Amor Fati
by flowerchild3286
Summary: Payson had a plan for her life. This wasn't it. COMPLETE!
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

A/N: I desperately need a break from studying and I'm in the mood to post something, so here you go. The first chapter of the new story. AU in that Emily is still around.

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><p>"Sasha?"<p>

He didn't like the sound of Kaylie's voice. That, coupled with the fact that she was willingly in his office, meant that trouble was brewing. He sighed. They were too close to the Olympics for this crap. "Yes?"

Kaylie bit her lip nervously. "Payson's locked herself in the bathroom and she won't come out. She's kind of freaking us out."

"Shit." Thinking back over the morning, Payson had come in early but never started training. He'd been busy working with Austin and hadn't noticed at the time, but that meant she had probably been in the bathroom for over an hour now. "I'll go check on her."

He was just standing from his chair when Summer spoke. "Sasha, maybe I should go. If she's upset she might respond better to another woman."

"No offense, Summer, but she doesn't even like you." Okay, maybe that was offensive anyway, but he didn't particularly care if he offended Summer right now. "If she's upset then you are the last person who should be talking to her. Excuse me."

He moved past her and made his way through the gym to the bathrooms. He could hear soft sounds of crying coming through the door, which sent his worry level through the roof. Payson almost never cried in the gym. She usually balled up her emotions until she got home. He knocked on the door and called, "Payson, it's me. Open the door."

"Go away, Sasha," she yelled back, sobs punctuating her words.

"Payson, you're scaring me and you're scaring your friends. I've known you for a long time you've never acted like this before. If you don't open the door, I'm going to break it down."

He heard movement inside and the lock clicked. When he pushed inside she was leaning against the wall by the door and immediately reached behind him to turn the lock again. Her face was puffy from crying and she was shaking. She moved away from him and sank against the opposite wall, where he suspected she had been crouching for the last hour.

"Payson, what's wrong?" The word 'upset' didn't do justice to how she looked. 'Devastated' worked better.

Instead of answering she nodded toward the sink. He walked over to where she had indicated and swore under his breath. Lying in the sink was the last thing he ever wanted to see for any of his elite gymnasts, much less for Payson: a positive pregnancy test. "Damnit, Payson, how did this even happen?"

"The normal way. I had sex. I got pregnant." This was not the time for sarcasm, but he couldn't blame her, either. Sarcasm was probably the only thing holding her together right now.

"What were you thinking?" He asked, trying not to sound accusatory. She knew what a huge mistake she made; she didn't need him to point it out for her.

"I wasn't thinking. I was drunk, I barely even knew what I was doing."

He felt his heart sink. "Payson…"

He didn't think he could even finish the sentence, so he was glad when she didn't need him to ask. They'd always been able to understand each other without words. "You don't have to worry, Sasha. He didn't force me. I was an _active_ participant." She put a self-derisive spin on the word. "Anyway, he didn't know what he was doing, either. He blacked out afterward, and I don't think he even knows we had sex. I mean, I'm sure he knows he had sex with somebody, but I don't think he knows it was me."

He winced at her all-too-blunt ramblings but refused to let it get to him. "Payson, I don't understand how this happened. You never drink."

"Yeah, that's me. I don't drink, I don't have sex, and yet here I am." She laughed a little. It was disturbing. "It's ironic, right? I was always the voice of reason, the one telling the girls not to focus on boys, but I'm the one who got knocked up. You know, I lost my virginity in almost the exact same context as Lauren did; at a party, drunk, with a guy who didn't love me. But at least Lauren was sober enough to use a goddamn condom."

Sasha would gladly go through the pain of busting his knee again rather than have this conversation. It was bad enough to listen to Payson talk about things like losing her virginity, but he was also obligated to ask the hard questions. "If you had unprotected sex, have you thought about the possibility of sexually transmitted diseases?"

"I went to the health clinic and got tested. I already knew he was clean anyway, though, so it was really just a precaution." She slapped both palms against the floor in anger. "This isn't supposed to happen, damnit! I don't even get my fucking period because my body chemistry is so screwed up, so how is it that I can get pregnant? Is there some god up there that just thinks it's funny to fuck with me? First with my back, and then I claw my way back on top only to wind up losing it all anyway."

Sasha came to sit beside her against the wall and wrapped one arm around her shoulders. "You don't have to lose it all, Payson."

"I've considered the options already, Sasha. Even if I get an abortion I'm out. The Olympics start in three weeks. If I have to take two of those weeks off, the NGO will replace me. It doesn't matter that I'm the National Champion or the reigning World Champion, they aren't going to take the risk of putting up someone who isn't well practiced." Earlier her voice had taken on a hysterical tinge, but now she just sounded hopeless.

"When did it happen?" This was his only hope.

Confusion was written across her face. She clearly didn't understand his line of thinking, but she answered anyway. "The last night in St. Louis. I was celebrating my win and things got out of hand."

"Clearly," he said, snorting. He immediately regretted it; he could feel her tense beneath his arm. "That puts you at eight and a half, nine weeks during the finals, right? You won't be showing yet."

She turned to face him, her tears temporarily stopped while shock took over. "You cannot possibly be suggesting what I think you're suggesting."

He was. "Hide it. You can get an abortion afterward, there will still be time. The NGO doesn't have to know anything."

"What if I get sick or dizzy or something? What happens then?"

"The alternates are there for a reason, Pay. If you can't compete then you step down, but at least you'll have tried." He put as much conviction in his voice as possible. If she missed the Olympics she would regret it for the rest of her life, and he didn't want her to have to live with that. She had worked too hard to let one drunken night ruin it all for her.

Then she asked a question that shocked him even more than seeing the pregnancy test had. "Do you think there is any chance that I could compete and still have the baby?"

The hope in her voice struck him momentarily speechless. It hadn't occurred to him that she would want to keep the baby, no matter what the circumstances. Finally he asked, "Is that what you want?"

She nodded slowly. He sighed and answered, "I don't know, maybe. Gymnastics is a hard sport, it's hard on the body. You'd have to ask a doctor to know for sure. Is this… is this a risk you want to take? Do you want to keep doing gymnastics if it could harm the baby?"

She nodded again. "I'm going to the Olympics. I guess I'm just hoping I can have both."

"Okay." He reached up with his thumb and brushed the tear tracks from her face. Then he said, "We don't have to tell the NGO, but you need to tell your parents, and you need to tell the father. You can't keep this a secret, not if there is even the slightest chance that you'll keep the baby. They need to know."

She looked terrified but agreed. He stood and pulled her to her feet, then shouldered the gym bag that was on the floor beside her. "Wash your face," he told her, "and then you're going home. Tell your parents, get your emotions under control, and come back Monday ready to train. We'll deal with this together, okay?"

She put her game face on and followed his directions. After she washed the tears from her face, although there was nothing to be done about her bloodshot eyes, she reached into the gym bag that he was holding and pulled out a small box. It was the package for the pregnancy test; she slipped the test back inside and zipped it into her bag. She answered his unasked question, "The last thing I need is for Lauren of Kaylie to find a pregnancy test in the trash can and put two and two together. The other girls can't know."

He didn't question her judgment about the girls. Instead, he laid his hand between her shoulder blades and urged her toward the exit. Before he unlocked the bolted door, he stopped and turned to Payson. "Just so you know, if I ever find out who he is, I'm going to kill him."

"Don't, Sasha. Just, please, don't."

"It shouldn't have been that way for you, Pay. You shouldn't have been a one night stand."

She closed her eyes and breathed deep, then compromised, "When you find out who he is, just give him a chance, okay? I don't know what to expect, so if he's an ass about it you can kill him, but if not then you leave him alone."

He nodded his agreement and then unlocked the door and led them back through the gym.

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><p>AN: Hmm… who's the father? Any guesses?

Reviews make me a very very happy person who is more likely to update quickly :) And FYI I plan to have a massive respond-to-reviews day when my tests are over, so if you've reviewed me lately you can expect to hear from me this weekend.


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

A/N: One test down, one to go. To celebrate I'm posting the next chapter :)

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><p>There was some kind of drama going on about Payson. Austin didn't know what it was, but Lauren, Kaylie, and Emily had been tittering about it all morning. They were surprisingly concerned. Normally this sort of thing was fodder for their gossip addiction, but he supposed the fact that it was Payson calmed down their evil tendencies a bit. She was the stable one in the group, the one who kept them from a global meltdown, so she had obviously earned some brownie points with them.<p>

He noticed when she finally came walking into the gym with Sasha. Everybody noticed. Somehow the news that Payson Keeler was crying in the bathroom had spread through the gym faster than a wildfire. She didn't look upset, though. She looked like her normal self, but when the other three girls started toward her Sasha warned them off with a simple head shake. He handed her the gym bag he had been carrying, squeezed her shoulder, and went up to stand guard on the platform outside his office.

That was pretty standard behavior for Sasha; Payson, on the other hand, was acting very strange. She fumbled around in her bag until she found her cell phone, then looked up and caught his eye from across the gym. She glanced down at her phone and then back up to him, a cryptic message if ever there was one, but Austin got the gist. She wanted him to check his phone. He didn't know why she was singling him out. Usually she didn't pay him attention even when he wanted her to.

Payson left, which confused the hell out of him because she never missed training, and he tried to look casual as he sauntered over to his bag. He dug out his phone just in time to see an alert flash across his screen: 1 New Message From Payson Keeler. Curious, he opened the message to see a single baffling line of text. _We need 2 talk. NOW._

Trying to look casual again, he pocketed his cell and headed toward the locker room, hoping no one noticed his departure. Whatever was going on, Keeler obviously wanted to keep it on the DL, so he would grab a pair of flip flops from his locker and sneak out the backdoor. It was fun having a secret rendezvous with her.

When he turned the corner of the building, Payson was leaning against the driver's side of her car and staring off into the distance. He turned to see what she was staring at and saw nothing but the normal old mountains that surrounded Boulder. Shaking his head, he made his way over to her. She was acting weird today.

She didn't smile when she looked up at him like he expected. In fact, she was staring him down with cold, hard eyes. Really weird. She tossed him her keys and said, "You're driving."

He stood there like an idiot while she walked around to the passenger side and climbed in. He finally got his feet working again and followed her to the car. He turned the key in the ignition and asked, "So where are we going, Keeler?"

She propped one foot up on her seat and wrapped her arms around her bent knee. "Somewhere alone. Where there won't be people passing by to see us."

"Okay," he said slowly, backing out of the parking spot. "Are we going there so you can kill me? 'Cause, I'm not gonna lie, you're kinda scaring me right now. What's with all the cloak and dagger?"

She didn't laugh at his joke (well, he was mostly joking), she just kept her eyes forward and said, "Shut up and drive, Austin."

He made his way to a secluded little spot near his lakehouse, which nobody seemed to appreciate but himself, and parked the car under a tree. Keeler hadn't said a single word during the fifteen minute drive. She had just stared into space, which is why it surprised him so much when she asked, "How much do you remember from that last night at Nationals?"

The question completely threw him, as much because she wasn't even looking at him as because it came out of nowhere. It was just one more thing to add to the long list of weird-ass things Keeler had done today, including texting him for this little get together in the first place. He could count on one hand the number of times she'd texted him. "Uhh, not much. I remember we went out to a club to celebrate our victories, and I think you got a little toasted on the champagne because I'm pretty sure we ended up doing body shots, and you would never have agreed to that if you were sober. That's about it."

"So you don't remember going back to the hotel?" He wished she'd goddamn look at him when she talked. It was freaking him out.

"No, but what does it matter?" he asked. "We both got back safe, so who cares if I remember it or not?"

She ignored him. "What about the next morning. What do you remember from then?"

"Being sick as hell. That's pretty much it, except I'm pretty sure I hooked up with someone, but that's really none of your business." She _finally_ turned to look at him. Then he caught sight of her stormy green eyes and the look of desperation on her face and things started to click into place. "That was _you_?"

She just turned away from him again, which had been driving him fucking mad ever since they got in the car, and he snapped. "Jesus Christ, Payson, why didn't you tell me? Why the hell did you sneak out of the room?"

"I know you think you're God's gift to women, Austin, but losing my virginity to _you_ in a drunken hook up, which _sucked_, by the way, was not one of my proudest moments. I really didn't want to rehash it all the next morning."

I opened his mouth to respond, but then her words caught up to him and he got offended. "What was so bad about your first time being with _me_?" he asked, mimicking the emphasis that she used. "And what do you mean it sucked?"

"It lasted all of two minutes and you passed out on top of me afterward, so yeah, it sucked, and I would really have rather my first time be with someone I loved, and who loved me back, instead of some jackass who gets offended because I wasn't particularly happy with his performance." She wasn't even yelling, she was just speaking with the same flat tone of voice which pissed him the hell off.

The words left his mouth before he could stop them, "You mean you would rather you lost your virginity to _Sasha_, right?" He hadn't meant to say it, really, but Sasha Belov was the big freaking purple elephant sitting in the middle of Payson's coupe, and it just slipped out.

She turned to look at him and he actually started to wish she'd look away again. If looks could kill… well, there was no _if_. He was pretty sure the look she was shooting his way could kill him. "Wow, you really are a jackass."

"Why the fuck are you telling me this now, Keeler?" A few minutes ago, before they started fighting, he would have been thrilled that it had been Payson, as soon as he got over his shock. Now he wished he could forget it again. "It's been four weeks, why the sudden need to confess and insult me?"

"I'm pregnant."

Complete silence reigned in the car for several long minutes. Austin was in shock. He had no idea what to do or how to respond. Finally, he asked, "What do you mean you're pregnant?"

"I mean I'm pregnant, as in there is a small person growing inside of me, as in diapers and onesies, as in you're going to be a daddy. How many definitions of the word pregnant do you know, Austin? Because I only know the one."

In the back of his mind he was pissed off about her sarcasm, but the front of his mind was too busy trying to process the word 'pregnant' for him to notice. "What are you going to do?"

She went back to the hollow, dead voice she'd been using. "I'm going to the Olympics. We'll see what happens from there. Sasha thinks there's a chance that I could compete and still keep it, since I'm not very far along, but I'll have to ask the doctor if doing gymnastics would harm the baby."

Austin's hands clenched around the steering wheel and he gritted his teeth, trying to keep his anger in check. "You told Sasha that you were pregnant with _my_ child before you told me?"

Payson rolled her eyes, the first real expression he'd seen on her face since she got in the car, and said, "What the hell did you think we were doing in the bathroom all that time? I wasn't exactly in a position to tell you _anything _until Sasha came and calmed me down. I noticed that _you_ didn't seem particularly worried that I was locked in the bathroom having a hysterical breakdown, so I don't really feel bad about telling Sasha first."

"Damnit!" he yelled, slamming his hand against the steering wheel and accidentally honking the horn. Payson jumped in the seat beside him. "What the hell is it with you and Sasha? Do you know how fucking hard it is to even catch your attention, Keeler? How the hell am I supposed to compete with him when you won't even look at me? All the time, every damn day, you're so caught up in _him_ that you don't even notice me."

She arched an eyebrow at him, a gesture she had picked up from Belov. "I'm supposed to notice you? Because all I've ever noticed from you is the fact that you hit on every girl in the gym and you broke my best friend's heart."

"You are so fucking oblivious," he yelled, throwing his hands up in the air. "That's it, I'm done. We're going back to the gym." He slammed the car into gear and sped back to the Rock, not caring how many traffic laws he was breaking. He was sick and tired of playing second fiddle to Sasha Belov. He'd been trying to get Payson's attention away from Belov for months, and even when she was in _his_ bed, carrying _his_ child, he was still second to Sasha.

He slammed to a stop in the Rock parking lot and tossed the keys in her lap. She spoke before he could climb out of the car. "Look, I don't want anyone to know I'm pregnant, so can you keep this quiet? And I'll speak to you before I tell anyone so it's a mutual decision, okay? I just don't want this leaking to the media."

"Fine, whatever. I won't tell anyone you're pregnant." He might tell everyone he slept with her, though, just to piss her off. He wasn't exactly in a friendly mood toward her right now.

"Wait." She reached out and took his hand, softening his anger by a hair. "I have to tell my parents, but I can leave you out of it if you want. Just tell me what you want me to do."

He wanted her to love him, but that probably wasn't what she meant. "Tell them the truth. I'm sure your dad needs a face to beat the shit out of, and it might as well be me." With that, he hauled himself out of the car and prowled his way back into the gym.

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><p>AN: Several of you guessed right :) It pretty much had to be Austin, all the other boys on the show are jerks. And Austin's not a jerk, despite how he acted in this chapter (and the next). He just got the shock of his life and didn't take it so well.

There is a reason I love reviews so much—they make you see things in a different light. So many of you thought/hoped that Sasha was the guy who didn't remember sleeping with her, and that didn't even occur to me as a possibility! It's so much fun to see what I missed in my own writing.

Reviews always make me happy, and even more so tonight because I would love to read reviews before I go take my National Boards tomorrow! And thanks so much for all of the well wishes ya'll have given me!


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

A/N: Don't judge Austin too harshly. Just sayin'

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><p>Sasha hadn't missed Austin until he came slamming through the doors. It was the hazard of running a big gym. Sometime you lost track of one gymnast while trying to help the fifty others in the gym.<p>

Austin looked furious. Anger was rolling off of him in waves; gymnasts were actually scampering out of his way as he stalked his way through the gym. The first thing that Sasha looked for was Kaylie. She was usually the reason behind any of his male gymnasts getting angry, but she looked as confused as Sasha felt. With Kaylie ruled out as a cause, he wracked his mind trying to figure out when Austin left. Suddenly an image floated to the front of his mind, and with it came suspicions. The last time he had seen Austin had been right about the time that Payson left, and he had been messing with his phone. Payson had walked out of the gym texting someone.

Sasha started sorting through what he knew about the father of Payson's baby. He had gotten completely pissed the night they slept together; that certainly fit with Austin. She had been with him while she was out celebrating her win at Nationals, which Austin had also won. But she also said that she knew he didn't have any STDs, which did not fit with what he knew about Tucker. There was always the chance that Payson knew something that he didn't, though, so that didn't rule out Austin as a possibility.

He turned to watching Austin's behavior, looking for clues. The younger man was fuming, too wired to stand still but without the concentration necessary to focus on a routine. As he watched, Austin slammed his fist into the wall and then turned to glare at Sasha. There was something in that look that verified all of Sasha's suspicions. Austin Tucker was the man that got Payson drunk and slept with her.

Sasha made his way to where his protégé was standing on the other side of the gym. That son of a bitch had worked with him one-on-one all morning like nothing was wrong, while Payson had been in the bathroom with her world falling apart around her. Sasha wanted to rip him limb from limb, but out of respect for Payson he wouldn't make a scene in front of the gym. She had told him that he was allowed to kill the father, though, if he was being an ass, and, based on Austin's current behavior, Sasha would bet his life that he had been no better toward Payson.

He came to a halt in front of Tucker, standing eye to eye with him in a way that no other gymnast could. With deadly quite, he said, "Collect your things and get out. You no longer have a place in this gym."

"So that's it, huh? It's all on me and she didn't do anything wrong, right?" He looked like a caged animal. One who was about to break free.

Sasha leaned closer to Austin's ear, so that no one else could hear, and whispered, "Do you know what the legal system calls it when you have sex with a woman who is too drunk to say no? They call it rape. Now get the hell out of my gym before I call the police and have you arrested."

Austin shoved hard against his chest; Sasha swayed back a few inches but he feet stayed firmly planted. One of the benefits of his boxing training was that no amateur fighter could ever best him. The younger man made to lunge at him, but two of the other male athletes in the gym reached out to hold him back. Anyone who wasn't completely stupid knew better than to take on Sasha in a fight.

Austin was yelling, effectively ruining any effort on Sasha's part to keep the confrontation private. "I don't force myself on women, you bastard. She was more than willing. Maybe you just can't handle the fact that your favorite gymnast isn't as perfect as you like to pretend she is."

Sasha turned to one of the two men holding Austin back and said, "Escort him out. If he gives you any trouble, just call the cops."

"No, you know what your real problem is?" called Austin, struggling against the gymnasts trying to pull him away. "Your problem is that I fucked the girl that you can't fuck. Everyone in the gym knows you're hot for her; we all see the way you touch her. It must be killing you to know that I already popped that cherry. She's good, too, better than I ever imagined. I bet it just tortures you that I know what it feels like to be inside of her and you never will."

Austin probably would have continued his rant if Sasha's fist hadn't made solid contact with his face. Austin slumped back and Sasha got in his face again, saying, "Get the hell out of my gym. If you come back here, I will have you arrested, and if you so much as look at Payson without her permission, I'll kill you. Do you understand?" Austin didn't respond, probably because he was halfway to unconscious, but Sasha took his silence as a yes. "Good. Now, as I said, gentlemen, escort him out. If you feel inclined, one of you can drive him home. If not, just dump him on the sidewalk and he can make his own way home."

He turned around to find the entire gym staring at him. He'd wanted to avoid such a spectacle, but he didn't think there _was_ a way of avoiding it. Tucker had been determined to make a scene, he had seen it in his eyes, and nothing Sasha could have said or done would have stopped the storm. Trying to minimize the effects of Austin's outburst, Sasha reprimanded them all with his standard, "Get back to work!"

He made his way to the office while his gymnasts scurried like mice to get back on their apparatuses, but as soon as he stepped through the door he regretted it. Summer Van Horne was standing by her desk with her hands on her hips and a disapproving look on her face. Bloody hell, why had he ever found this woman attractive? She was like a fly you couldn't shoo.

"Would you care to explain what just happened down there?" she asked, and he could almost feel the judgment and condescension radiating from her.

He pinched the bridge of his nose, feeling a migraine coming on, and said, "No, I really wouldn't, because it's none of your goddamn business." He heard her shocked intake of breath and fought down a smile. His choice of swearword had been coincidental, but the fact that Summer found it so particularly offensive was like wrapping a bow around the word and giving it to him as a present.

"I think that Austin Tucker just made it my business, when he shouted it loud enough for everybody in the gym to hear. And I also think that there is a real problem with the fact that everyone knew he was talking about Payson just because he brought you into the discussion."

Was she seriously taking that view on the situation? Austin Tucker had tipped over the edge of sanity, but at least he had a good excuse. He'd just learned that he was going to have a child he didn't remember conceiving. Summer, on the other hand, had no legitimate reason for the bullshit that was spewing from her mouth. "That 'discussion' as you called it, was the mad raving of a young man who took advantage of a seventeen year old girl and got caught. And despite how loudly Tucker was just broadcasting his opinions, Payson's life is none of your concern until she asks for your opinion, which she has not." With that, he dismissed Summer from his attention and turned to grab a stack of papers regarding the other elite girls' routines.

"What did he mean, the way you touch her?"

Sasha turned to stare at her, his face a mask of complete and utter disbelief. "What part of 'mad ravings' didn't you understand, Summer? You can't possibly be taking anything he says seriously, can you?" Not waiting to hear her answer, because he knew what it would be, he spun on his heel and left. She was even crazier than Austin.

Lauren, Emily, and Kaylie were waiting for him beside the office platform. Of everyone in the gym, these three girls were the ones who needed an explanation about what had just happened. Rather than do it in public, or in the office where Summer could eavesdrop, he led them into the trainer's room and closed the door.

Lauren was the first one to speak, and, surprisingly, she didn't have anything sarcastic or snippy to say. "Sasha, what happened out there? Was this why Payson was crying this morning?"

He didn't want to give out too much information, especially since Payson was adamant that the girls not know about her pregnancy, but they deserved some explanation. "In a way, yes, but obviously she had no idea that Austin would snap like that. I'm glad that she wasn't here to hear it."

"Did he…" Much like Sasha this morning, Kaylie wasn't able to put a voice to her question, but everyone in the room knew what she was asking.

Sasha felt fairly comfortable giving this answer. He knew that Payson would not want her friends to believe that about the father of her child, even though Sasha had just accused him of the same thing. "Payson says no. Either way, it was… not what he made it out to be."

"Come on guys," said Emily, "This is _Austin_ we're talking about here. Our _friend_, the one who's completely crazy about Payson. He would never do something like that." She sounded more hopeful than certain.

"You saw what just happened out there, Em. That was not the Austin we know. And _crazy_ about Payson might be more appropriate than you know." Kaylie, obviously knowing more than the rest of them, elaborated, "That's why we broke up. I don't know when it happened, but at some point he just got… obsessed. He watched her all the time, even when he was talking to me, and he was always trying to catch her attention but she just wouldn't bite. That's why he went off on you, Sasha, because every time he tried to get her to notice him she was talking to you. He was jealous."

He pinched the bridge of his nose again and closed his eyes. That migraine was going to be full-force soon. "Okay, I'm only asking you this because it's been a spectacularly bad day and I don't have the energy to figure this out myself. How many people in this gym think that Payson and I are involved?"

"About half," Lauren answered promptly. It scared him that she didn't even have to think about it before answering.

"Fuck," Sasha muttered under his breath; he recognized the giggle that followed even with his eyes still closed. "Don't tell your father I said that in front of you, Lauren, or he'll have me fired." He opened his eyes again and looked at his girls, all of whom meant so much to him. "You know it's not true, don't you?"

They all answered in the affirmative, and there was no sign of delay or lie in any of their countenances. This relieved him. He cared deeply for all four of his elite girls and he didn't want any of them to feel uncomfortable around him. Thankful for the assurances they gave him, he sought to give them some as well. "I don't think Austin is a bad person, girls. He's made some pretty big mistakes, but he's not dangerous and I don't think you're going to see a repeat of today. Like me, he's had a spectacularly bad day. We've all dropped our basket as some point, right?" They smiled, because the four people standing in the room had witnessed many of each other's crazy moments, and they had come out stronger for it. "So don't hold it against Austin because he dropped his."

"Come on," he said, holding the door open for them to pass through. "We're evaluating each other's vaults today, just like the judges would. We'll see who can get the closest to my scoring." Each girl hugged him on the way out, and he smiled when he realized that he'd needed the hug as much as they had.

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><p>AN: He's really not a bad person, I swear. He's actually a pretty great person, he just had a really, really bad day. I'm going to work on MKB now, so if that goes well it should be up in the next couple of days. If it doesn't go well I'll probably throw my computer at the wall in frustration and have to wait for a new one before I post :)

Review, please! They make me happy and happiness inspire writingness.


	4. Chapter 4

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

A/N: Sorry this is late. I took a trek down to my alma mater today and just now got back (it's midnight here).

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><p>Kim hung up the phone, not sure who to be more pissed at, her daughter or Summer. Summer had called to tell her all about the mess that Austin Tucker had just stirred up at the Rock, most of it revolving around her daughter. Somewhere between Summer's "I'm so concerned about Payson"s and "I thought you should know"s, Kim had decided that her co-manager was a nosy bitch. The young woman sounded almost gleeful while telling her about the things that Payson had supposedly done with Austin Tucker and the inappropriate relationship that Sasha was reportedly having with her teenage daughter. Kim dismissed the rumors about Sasha out of hand. She knew there was nothing going on between the two, and that Summer was bitter about her break up with Sasha, now long since passed. The rumors about Austin, however, concerned her considerably. She'd seen the way he watched her at the gym, and something had been different about Payson this last month. There was a definite possibility that Payson had gotten herself into something too big to handle.<p>

Despite having just hung up the phone with Summer, Kim was surprised when she heard Payson coming through the front door. Summer said that Payson had left the gym early this morning, but Kim had assumed she'd gone for conditioning. She never missed training, much less this close to the Olympics. If Payson was home, something was wrong.

Her suspicions were confirmed when Payson walked into the kitchen with red eyes and tear tracks down her face. Something was definitely wrong. "Pay, honey, what happened?"

Payson didn't answer. She just sat down at the counter, put her head down on her arms, and cried. "Payson," Kim started slowly, not wanting to push her daughter too fast. "Does this have something to do with Austin?"

Payson's head shot up from her arms. "How did you know that?"

So it was true. She just hoped the rest of it wasn't true, too. "Summer just called—" Payson mumbled something under her breath that sounded like "Bible-thumping hoochie mamma" "—and she said that Austin just made some kind of scene at the Rock. Apparently he said some things about you."

"Oh, God, what did he say?" She was desolate, which meant that there was something pretty damn bad that he could have said.

Kim hesitated, not sure how to word her answer. "He claimed to have…done things, with you. And he made some insinuations about you and Sasha."

"That stupid, jealous idiot," she said, pounding her fist on the counter. "He knows there's nothing going on between me and Sasha."

"And the other things he said?" she asked her daughter, afraid of what the answer was.

Payson eyes filled with tears again as she nodded her head. "They're true. Probably not in the way he said them, but they're true. We had sex."

Kim's heart sank, and then broke when she heard he daughter's last words. She said "We had sex," not "We slept together." Kim knew her daughter, and if what happened between Payson and Austin had been a positive experience, she would have used the euphemism. She was barely able to draw the breath to ask, "What happened, sweetie?"

"We went out, after Nationals, to celebrate. We got drunk. I don't even know how I ended up drinking that much alcohol, but the next thing I know were in his room and—" She broke off with a sob, unable to continue.

Kim whispered, unable to say the words out loud, "Was it consensual?" Payson nodded and all Kim could process was relief. She never thought she'd be relieved that her seventeen year old daughter had chosen to have sex with a man six years older than her, but it was so much better than the alternative.

"There's more." Payson barely choked out the words, and Kim's heart broke into even more pieces. "We didn't—we didn't use a condom."

"Oh, God." She was crying now, too, holding on to the counter for support. "Which one of the possible consequences of that are we facing right now?" She was praying for one of the more minor STDs. She couldn't believe she was praying for her daughter to have a sexually transmitted disease, but it was definitely the lesser of evils. If Austin had HIV, or if Payson was…

"I'm pregnant."

Kim dropped her head into her hands and sobbed. She didn't know how long she cried. When she finally looked up Payson eyes were dry but her body was still sobbing. She had probably cried so much today that she didn't have any tears left. Kim's throat felt strange and unused when she croaked out, "What are you going to do?"

"I don't know. For now, I'm going to go to the doctor and see if it's possible to go to the Olympics and still have a healthy baby. If that's not an option, then I'll get an abortion after the Olympics are over. I'm only four weeks. I still have time."

Kim had to be the one to ask. "Will you be able to live with yourself if you get an abortion?"

Payson closed her eyes, as if trying to block out the question. "If I have to choose, then I'm going to spend the rest of my life regretting something. I'll either regret not going to the Olympics or I'll regret giving up the baby. If I choose the Olympics then all of the regret I feel will be directed at myself. If I chose to keep the baby, then eventually I will resent it for what it took away from me, and I won't do that to a child. I'm hoping, I'm _praying_, that I don't have to choose."

"Does Austin know?" She was pretty sure she knew the answer already, but she needed to know for sure.

Payson nodded and grimaced. "I told him this morning, which was probably the reason for his freak out at the Rock. He didn't remember what happened in St. Louis, so he got a little more of a shock than most men in his situation do."

Oh, God. He didn't remember. Payson said they got drunk, but passing out and forgetting you had sex with someone was more than just drunk. She'd never thought so poorly of Austin before. She'd always assumed he was a decent boy, even if he did have an unhealthy obsession with her daughter. She'd never thought he would actually act on his feelings for her, at least not unless she was open to a relationship with him. Suddenly a darker image altogether was forming in her head.

"Payson, have you considered the possibility that Austin purposefully got you drunk so that you would sleep with him?" It wasn't like Payson to drink. She never even had more than half a glass of wine when they were at a special occasion, but if Austin was pushing her…

Payson moved the kitchen sink and wiped her eyes with a dishcloth. She answered, "It occurred to me, the first couple of days after, but I don't think so. He was definitely pressuring me to drink, but I think he just thought it would be funny to see me drunk. If he'd thought sleeping together was a possibility, he wouldn't have gotten nearly so drunk himself. It kind of defeats the point of tricking a girl into bed if you forget it all." She was right. His intentions obviously weren't honorable, but maybe they weren't quite as _dis_honorable as she thought.

Kim was mentally going through a list of all the questions she needed to ask Payson. This was not a list she ever expected to compile, but here she was doing it. She thought she had most of the big questions covered. "Who else knows?"

"Just Sasha. If it weren't for him, I would probably still be locked in the bathroom crying. I don't know how I would have gotten through this morning without him." For what was probably the millionth time, Kim thanked God that Sasha had come to the Rock. He was so good for her daughter, her rock in the storm. She made a mental note to thank him when she went into the office on Monday for all he had done for them.

"Who else are you going to tell?"

"Before the Olympics? Just Daddy and Becca. Austin may tell his parents, I don't know. They have a weird relationship. If I get through the Olympics and the baby is okay, then we'll start telling other people. For now, though, it's just us and Sasha.

Kim was surprised how well Payson was handling the situation, at least now that she'd stopped crying. She was being incredibly mature about it, which was helping Kim to calm down as well. When she'd found herself in a similar situation at eighteen, although without the Olympics on the line, she had cried for three days straight, and that was with Mark there to support her. Austin wasn't like Mark, so Payson was doing this alone. Suddenly, a question occurred to Kim that she should have asked first, not last. "Payson?" Her daughter looked up at her. "Are you okay?"

She smiled, in a sad sort of way. "Not really. I mean, how could I be? But I think I will be eventually."

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><p>AN: Poor Payson. It's a good thing she has such a great mom.

The next chapter of MKB is halfway finished. See aforementioned excuse for why it didn't get done today :) By the by, if any of you are juniors and seniors in high school and looking at colleges, Baylor University is the correct choice.

Reviews are like crack to me. Please feed my addiction.


	5. Chapter 5

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

A/N: You may have noticed a trend in my updates. I'm going to post a new chapter every other day.

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><p>They had to tell Mark. Or rather, <em>she<em> had to tell Mark. She and Payson had discussed it at length, and the ultimate decision was that she would tell Mark the news and let Payson talk to him afterward. Payson had been opposed to the idea, not wanting to put that kind of pressure on her mother, but Kim had insisted. Payson had been through enough already, she didn't need the added stress of telling her father. She was sure that Payson would stress about it anyway, but it hopefully wouldn't be quite as bad if she wasn't the one doing the telling.

He came home with Becca in tow, having picked her up from Avery's house on his way home from work. She hugged her daughter and sent her back to Payson's room, knowing that Pay would need the emotional support, even if Becca didn't know what she giving support for. Then she led her husband into the living room and sat down with him on the couch, turning herself so that she was facing him.

"Okay, Kim, you're scaring me. You're wearing your 'we're going to lose the house' look again, and since I know we aren't losing the house, it must be something else bad." He was joking, but he was too close to the truth for her comfort. She needed to rip off the band-aid and get it over with.

"Payson came home early from practice today," she said, trying to get herself on a roll and run straight into the truth.

Mark sat up straighter on the couch, alert to anything that would cause his daughter to abandon her training for a few hours. "What happened? Is she hurt? Sick?"

She winced. She hadn't meant to lead him down that path. "Not exactly. She found out some news this morning, which she came home to tell me."

"Okay," he said, his eyebrows scrunching together in confusion. "What kind of news?"

She reached out to hold her husband's hand, support for her rather than comfort for him, took a deep breath, and let the words out with her exhalation. "She's pregnant."

He sat still for a very long time, not doing anything but examining their interlocked fingers. "She's pregnant?"

"Yes," she said, nodding even though he wasn't looking at her head. "Pregnant. About four weeks. She just found out today."

"Who's the father?" he asked, completely calm. He was_ too_ calm; it was a bad sign.

"Austin Tucker."

He huffed out an almost-laugh. "Well, I thought you were going to say Sasha Belov, so at least that's an improvement." Kim would really have rather it been Sasha. At least he cared about Payson. "How long have they been sleeping together?"

"They're not," she said, not really wanting to give the answer to this question. It would be better if they had been sleeping together, in a regular relationship instead of a drunken fling. "It was one night and it wasn't a good experience for her, so you're not ever going to ask her about it."

"Not a good experience," he repeated, like he was testing the feel of the words on his tongue. "Does that mean something I don't want to think about or something I _really _don't want to think about?"

She frowned, knowing what he meant but afraid of his reaction to the answer. "It means something you really don't want to think about."

"That son of a bitch," he growled. An actual growl. Her husband just growled. "I'll kill him."

"No you won't," she said firmly, completely set against letting him harm Austin. "I don't think he _meant_ any harm, whatever the outcome might have been, and it would just make things harder on Payson if you hurt him. Things are rocky between them anyway, and the baby is going to need a dad."

"So she's keeping it?"

"She's going to try," she said, trying to determine what was going on in his head. "She's going to the Olympics, and we've got an appointment with the doctor to talk about the risks to the baby. We did some research this afternoon, though, and it looks promising."

His hand contracted around hers. "Why isn't she the one telling me all of this?"

"I wouldn't let her. It's been a rough day for her, finding out this morning and having to tell Austin and then me. That's a lot of stress, which can't be good for the baby." She was hoping to appeal to the child-lover in him, the one who picked up baby shoes every time they walked through the department store and reminisced about when Payson and Becca were newborns. "She's in her room, waiting to talk to you, but I wouldn't let her be the one to tell you."

"Well, if she's waiting to talk to me, then bring her out." She must have looked hesitant, because he promised, "I won't yell."

She went to collect Payson. They left Becca in Payson's bedroom and came out into the living room holding hands. Payson looked like she was going to be sick.

Mark hadn't moved from his spot on the couch, but he was now hunched forward with his elbows on his knees. "So, your mom says you're planning to keep the baby."

"If I can," Payson answered, lifting her head a little now that she had something concrete to concentrate on. "I have to talk to the doctor still, but Austin and I created a child together, and no matter how that came about I'm not going to take it lightly."

"Good," he said, lifting his eyes to meet his daughter's. "It's not something that should be taken lightly. Now I'm going to tell you the exact same thing my dad told me when your mom got pregnant with you. Get out."

"Mark!"

He ignored Kim's injection and continued. "If you're going to make adult choices, like the choice to have sex, then you're going to live like an adult. Make your own food, clean your own house, pay your own bills. Raise that baby like it's your child instead of a little brother or sister that your mom and I raise for you."

"Fine." That was all she said. She didn't argue or try to persuade him otherwise, she just spun on her heel and left the room. But just because Payson didn't argue with her dad didn't mean that Kim wasn't going to.

"What the hell are you thinking, Mark? Do you want to lose our daughter? And our grandchild? You cannot just throw her out."

His jaw was set like he wasn't going to change his mind. "My dad did the exact same thing to me, and he was right. You cannot learn to be a responsible parent when you still have parents taking care of you."

"This is completely different and you know it. You were twenty one. She's seventeen. You worked hard to get us through that time and I know that, but you have no idea what it feels like to be a pregnant teenager. She needs support! I had you to lean on and I was still terrified. She doesn't even have that. Austin is not like you. She can't rely on him like I relied on you, and she shouldn't have to after—"

"After what, Kim?" He demanded, standing abruptly from the couch. "She shouldn't have to rely on him after what?"

"I told you it wasn't a good experience for her. I meant what I said, I don't think Austin meant any harm, but that didn't make it any less humiliating or any less degrading for her. If she has to go to him to ask for help it will be like rubbing salt into her wounds." It had taken Kim most of the afternoon to get her tears under control, and now she was crying again. "I won't let you do this to her, Mark. I won't."

She fled to her daughter's room, where Payson was calmly packing a bag and Becca was sitting in the middle of the bed clutching Payson's stuffed bear. "What's wrong, Mom? Why were you and Daddy yelling, and where is Payson going?"

"She's not going anywhere," Kim insisted. "It was just a misunderstanding."

Payson looked up from her bag. "It's not a misunderstanding, Mom. Dad wants me gone, so I'm going. I'll stay with Sasha tonight and then figure the rest out in the morning. I have plenty of money, and so does Austin if I ever needed it, so getting my own place shouldn't be a problem. I'll be fine."

"It's not just about money, Pay," she said, trying to make her daughter see reason. "You need support. You can't go through this alone."

"I won't be alone. I'll see you and Becca and Sasha everyday at the Rock, and Austin may be a jerk but I don't think he's going to abandon me. I'll have plenty of support."

Becca cut across what Kim was about to say with a loud, "What's going on here? You guys are freaking me out. Dad's throwing you out and mom's saying things like 'you can't go through this alone,' it's making me think a lot of things that are probably way worse than the truth, so just tell me already. What's going on?"

Payson stopped packing and sat on the bed with Becca, laying one hand on her sister's shoulder. "You're right, Becs. I'm sorry, we weren't being fair to you. You have to understand that this is a secret, though, okay? So you're not allowed to tell anyone."

"Okay, fine, it's a secret, whatever. Just tell me already before I have an aneurism from the stress." Kim almost laughed at her daughter's hyperbole. Almost, but not quite. She should have known some of the stress would spill over to her youngest.

"Becca," Payson said, staring hard into her sister's eyes, "I'm pregnant."

Becca's eyes glazed over for a few seconds before she managed to say, "Is this a joke?"

"Becs, why would I joke about being pregnant, or about Dad throwing me out of the house? What could possibly be funny about that?"

"It's just," the young girl waved her hand about as if it could make the right word appear. "You're Payson. You have to have sex to get pregnant, and you're _Payson_."

For some unfathomable reason, Payson laughed. "Oh, damn, if you knew how many times I have thought that exact same thing today. I still can't even believe this is happening. Well, learn a lesson from your big sister, Becs. It only takes once to get you pregnant and it doesn't even have to be good. Don't be stupid like me."

"So you had bad sex with someone?" Becca asked. "Who'd you have bad sex with?"

Even Kim couldn't help but laugh that time. She knew it was horrible, but hearing that question come out of her thirteen year old daughter's mouth was so absurd that she had to laugh. The fact that it was directed toward her older daughter made it even more absurd. Suddenly Kim understood why Payson had laughed at Becca's previous statement. It was _Payson_, for God's sake.

Payson finally calmed down enough to answer her sister's question. "Austin. Austin's the father."

Becca wrinkled her nose. "Is that what the fuss at the Rock was about today? I got like twenty texts saying that Austin had gone all crazy at the gym and he was yelling stuff about you."

"Yeah, well, we've all had a hard day, including Austin. He's still a complete asshole for telling the whole gym that we had sex, but I get the breakdown."

The room was silent for a little while Payson finished packing. She was zipping up her bag when Becca suddenly piped up, "Wait, Austin Tucker's bad at sex?"

Payson laughed so hard that she fell to her knees. Tears were streaming from her eyes, probably equal parts laughter and despair, and when she could finally get words around her hysterical giggles, all she said was, "Oh, God, I wish I could put that on my Facebook wall."

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><p>AN: What do you think about Mark's reaction? Or even better, what do you think about Becca's reaction? (I always laugh when I write Becca)

I love reviews. I love knowing what you thought when you read the chapter and I _especially_ love when you ask questions. They are so much fun to answer.

**Note about the pregnancy—I'm sure a few of you will catch that Payson's not really 4 weeks. It's been 4 weeks since conception, so that makes her 6 weeks pregnant, but she doesn't know that yet.


	6. Chapter 6

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

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><p>Sasha had just dumped a stack of blankets and pillows on his couch when he heard a knock at the door. Payson had texted him earlier and asked if she could stay with him for the night, which could only mean that things had not gone well with her parents. He opened the door to reveal a relatively calm Payson Keeler standing on the other side with a bag slung over her shoulder.<p>

"Hey."

"Hey."

The lack of any real words should have been awkward, but it wasn't. Everything had always been so easy with Payson, with the small exception of the uncomfortable days after she kissed him. Payson just brushed past him into the apartment and headed toward the couch. She dropped her bag beside her, sat down cross-legged on the cushions, and dropped her head into her hands. She was a strange mixture of defiance and dejection, too proud to let her walls down but too hurt to act like nothing was the matter.

He moved next to her and sat down, offering his support without words. She spoke first, as he knew she would. Her voice was muffled by her hands, but he understood her words anyway. "Dad kicked me out."

Sasha was stunned. Mark Keeler was the most supportive father he had ever met; it didn't make sense that he would throw his daughter out of the house just because she made a mistake. "I'm sure he didn't mean it, Payson. He'll calm down."

"Oh, I'm pretty sure he did mean it," she said, lifting her head from her hands and looking up at him. "He didn't say this out of anger. He told me he was glad that I was taking responsibility and then very calmly told me to get out."

"Why would he do that?" he asked, rubbing soothing circles between Payson's shoulder blades. "That doesn't fit with what I know of your father at all."

She slouched so that she was leaning against his bicep, and he could feel her sigh. "He thinks I need to act like an adult, learn to take care of myself. His dad did the same thing to him when Mom got pregnant, and I can't really disagree with the philosophy. I can't raise the baby in my parent's house. I'll have to move out in a few months anyway, so it's not that big of a deal to do it now instead."

"It is a pretty big deal, Payson. There are problems with this that neither you nor your father have realized, the first one being that you are seventeen. No place, or at least no _safe_ place, will let you live alone as a minor."

He felt her ribcage rise and fall again as she took a deep breath. "Fine. I'll be eighteen in a few weeks. I can stay in a hotel until then. I have more than enough money."

"You'll have the same problem at a hotel as you would at an apartment," he pointed out. "You're a minor. Even when we go to competitions we are required to have a certain number of adults stay in the hotel to supervise you. So unless you want to tell one of your friends about the pregnancy and stay with them, you have three options. You can go home, you can stay with Austin, or you can stay with me. I'm going to assume, considering what happened today, that staying with Austin is off the table, so that leaves you with two options."

Payson sent him a withering look. "That leaves me with _no_ options, Sasha. Dad isn't going to let me come home and I can't stay with you on a long term basis. You have a one bedroom apartment."

"I can sleep on the couch for a month or two if I have to. That's it. Those are your choices. If you aren't comfortable staying with me then you have to work things out with your dad." He hated that she was even in this position, but there was no way out now.

The look she gave him was earnestly confused. "Why wouldn't I be comfortable staying with you? You're the one who would be inconvenienced by it, not me." It was clear in her eyes that Payson didn't understand why she might reasonably be uncomfortable living alone with a man who was thirteen years older than her and with whom she was constantly linked in rumors and innuendos. For perhaps the hundredth time that day, Sasha wondered how such a sweet and innocent young woman could end up in a situation like this. Probably from being _too_ sweet and innocent, he thought.

"I don't mind being inconvenienced, Pay. I'll talk to your mum tomorrow, see how things are with your dad. I think it would be better for you to go home, but if that's not an option then you'll stay here." It wasn't the best plan, considering how many people already assumed they were having an affair, but it was the best plan that they had. "There is still a problem after you turn eighteen, though. You can't live alone while you're pregnant."

Payson shifted away from him and leaned back into the sofa. Her eyes were drifting shut with exhaustion, even though it was only mid-evening. "People do it all the time, Sasha. I'm pregnant, not handicapped."

"I realize that, Payson. I know that women often live alone while they're pregnant, but that doesn't mean it's a good option for you or that either you mother or I would be comfortable with that arrangement. You need someone there with you in case of an emergency. And what about when you go into labor? How are you going to get to the hospital if you're alone?"

"Fine, you've made your point," she said, throwing her hands up in exasperation. "If everything is…okay…after the Olympics, I'm going to tell the girls anyway. I'll ask Emily to move in with me. Happy?"

He frowned at her. "No, I'm not. I'm not happy about anything in this situation. I'm glad that you're sorting out a plan, but I'm not sure if you realize how hard this is going to be. Raising a child is difficult enough under ideal circumstances. As a single teenage mother, it's going to be a million times harder."

She pulled herself upright again and leveled a serious gaze at him. "I know, Sasha. I know it's going to be hard. But I'm trying to take this one day at a time right now, and that means putting off some of the tough questions until I'm more equipped to handle them. Right now I'm trying to deal with the fact that I might—" her voice broke with emotion "—that I might not stay pregnant. I need to wait until I know for sure before I can start planning for the future."

Shit. Even though he knew how uncertain the pregnancy was, he had been thinking of it in terms of fact instead of possibility ever since she told him that she wanted to keep the baby. "You're right. I'm sorry, I was being insensitive. I can't imagine what it feels like to have that hanging over your head. I shouldn't have pushed you."

"You were just trying to help," she said. "I get that. It's just… it feels like my entire life is up in the air right now. I meant what I said this morning; I'm going to the Olympics. But I'm _terrified_ that I'm going to lose the baby in the process. I know that I'm seventeen, and I'm not ready, and Austin's _definitely_ not ready, but I can't just give this up. Now that I know I'm pregnant I can't go back to the way things were before."

Sasha drew her into a hug and she sank against him almost immediately. It had been a long, hard day for her and she was barely holding it together. "I wish I could tell you it will all be okay." He sat holding her for a long time, giving her the opportunity to relax, at least as much as possible, and wishing he could protect her from all the hardships she was about to face. An hour passed without speaking before he broke the silence. "You should go to bed. If you want the baby to be healthy you need to get plenty of sleep."

"I need you to tell me something first," she said, her eyes managing to be defiant despite the fact that she was nearly asleep. "I need you to tell me what Austin said. Word for word. No shielding me."

He didn't want to, but he told her. He cringed as he repeated some of the worst things that Austin said, but he didn't leave anything out. She listened without interrupting until he was finished, and then said, "I'm sorry he dragged you into this. I don't blame him for flipping out, really, because he did get two really big bombs dropped on him at once, but I just wish he'd left you out of it."

"I brought it on myself. I honestly don't think I could have stopped him from making a scene, but I did basically accuse him of raping you." He'd been angry at the time and the words had left his mouth before he could even fully consider them. "I'd go pretty ballistic if someone accused me of rape, too."

"You weren't wrong, though." He stiffened and she backtracked quickly. "I mean, you were wrong about what actually happened, but what you said was true. I was too drunk to say no, even if I had wanted to, and Austin was encouraging the use of alcohol in a minor. If I wanted to press charges, he could go to jail."

"Just so we're clear, you don't want to press charges, right? Because if you do I'll support you one hundred percent."

She shook her head. "No, I don't. It wasn't just him. We both made mistakes that night." She paused and bit her lip. "He said earlier that he couldn't compete with you, that he couldn't ever get my attention because I was too focused on you. I think that's why he said that stuff about you, because he was jealous. But, honestly, Sasha, I didn't even know he was interested in me. Was I blind to have missed that?"

"Maybe, but I was blind, too. Kaylie said he was obsessed with you. I should have noticed that, but I never did. I saw the way he looked at you sometimes, but I didn't think anything of it because all of the boys look at you that way. Now I keep thinking, what if I'm missing something about one of these other boys, too?" He'd been worried about it all day. If Austin had an unhealthy attraction to Payson, he might not be the only one. She would never notice until something bad happened, because she didn't have a clue how the opposite sex reacted to her.

Payson didn't seem as worried. "Kaylie exaggerates, Sasha. I don't think Austin is obsessed with me. Everyone is making him out to be a monster and he's not. He's an asshole sometimes, but he's not a monster. I think maybe I just pushed him too far, because he apparently really liked me and I pretty much ignored him."

"That doesn't make it okay."

"No, it doesn't," she agreed. "But it makes it understandable. I think Austin and I have both gone way past the edge of 'okay,' so there's no point in using that as a standard."

"Okay," he said, and then they both chuckled at his choice of word. "Alright. We will give him the benefit of the doubt for now, but I think you should stay away from him for a little while anyway. He needs to calm down before you see him again. Now let's get you to bed."

He pulled her up from the couch and grabbed her bag from the floor beside him. The action was eerily similar to the way they left the women's bathroom this morning. He gave her a quick tour of the bedroom and then left her alone to sleep. When he came back into the living room he had the strong urge for a beer, but he had to remind himself that binge drinking was not the best way to help Payson right now. Instead he just laid down on the couch and tried (unsuccessfully) to go to sleep.

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><p>AN: I know I'm a dork for even mentioning this, but I can't help it :) The past tense of 'lie' is 'lay,' but I have always thought that sounded stupid. _He just lay down on the couch_ doesn't sound good to me, so I intentionally used 'laid' even though it's the wrong word, and I'll keep doing it all through this fic. (They lie down a lot in this story :D)

Let me know what you think of the chapter! Or even just weigh in on the pointless grammar issue, because I always find it fun to hear if other people are bothered by things like that, too.


	7. Chapter 7

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

A/N: Posted a day early by special request :) Also, I combined two chapters because they were both really short, so you get a double dose.

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><p>The first thing he noticed was the crick in his neck. The second thing was that he was still tired. The third thing was that there were sounds coming from his kitchen.<p>

He'd spent the night in a fit of worry, dozing on and off and getting up every hour or so to check on Payson. He'd expected her to spend the night crying, but from what he could tell she'd slept soundly. She was probably too exhausted to even bother crying anymore. Around five in the morning, Sasha finally fell asleep and stayed that way.

He opened his eyes and then shut them again quickly. He's asked if Payson was comfortable staying with him, but he didn't think to wonder if he would be comfortable staying with _her_. He had no romantic feelings for Payson, but he was human, and when a man woke up to a clear view of a gorgeous woman wearing nothing but a pair of cotton shorts and a tank top, things were bound to happen. Maybe he should sleep with his head at the opposite end of the couch so that he would have a minute to prepare himself before he saw her in the mornings.

Once he was confident that he could handle the sight of Payson in his kitchen, he opened his eyes again. The clock on the wall said it was ten o'clock. If Payson was just now up, which her pajamas indicated she was, then she'd slept for well over twelve hours. Good. She needed it.

"Hey," he said, sitting upright on the couch and stretching out his neck and shoulders. One part of his brain was focusing on how to get rid of the various aches he accumulated over the night while another part was musing that the only greeting he and Payson ever used was 'hey.'

"Hey yourself. I thought you would have been up hours ago." She was cooking something, but he couldn't fathom what. He had no food in his apartment. She commented on it. "You're kitchen's pathetic, by the way. What do you eat? There's nothing in your refrigerator but milk, eggs, and beer, and I think this skillet was actually left here by the person before you. I had to scour it before I was willing to cook with it."

He smiled. Aside from the inherent problems, he could get used to living with Payson. "You read my mind. I was wondering what on earth you were cooking since I have no food here."

"It's the lamest egg white omelet in the world. Which, by the way, have you heard of a thing called an egg separator?"

"Um, no. I don't even know what that is." His skills in the kitchen were pretty limited. He could scramble eggs and make toast, and that was about it.

She rolled her eyes. "It's a thing that separates eggs, idiot. I had to do this the old fashioned way, which is a pain in the ass. If I'm going to stay here, I'm going grocery shopping. And even if I'm not staying here, I'm going grocery shopping. Cavemen live better than this."

He couldn't help but laugh. She sounded like Kim. "I never would have pictured you as domestic. You've been here for half a day and already you're taking over this place like a mother hen."

They both faltered at the word 'mother.' It was hard to get used to, this idea that Payson might be a mother in eight short months. Payson recovered first, offering up a snippy reply. "Well, obviously you need someone to take care of you. I'm surprised you're even still alive. I mean, when's the last time you did laundry?"

"I uh… I actually send my laundry out." It was a completely reasonable thing for a busy man to do, but saying it out loud made him sound pretty pathetic.

She stared at him in disbelief. "Why would you do that? You have a washer and dryer that comes with the apartment."

"I'm a very busy person. I don't have time to waste on house chores." The excuse sounded lame to his own ears. Payson was probably reevaluating her level of respect for him.

"Umhm, sure," she said, reaching Summer-levels of condescension. "It's not like my mom works the same hours you do and manages to clean and cook and help Becca with her school work. You're obviously way too busy."

He was used to Payson's cheek. She argued with him all the time in the gym, and made jokes, and called him out when he was being unreasonable. This was different, though. She was making fun of him with a level of self-assurance that he rarely saw in her, which was impressive as she was one of the most self-assured gymnasts he had ever met. He tilted his head at her. "You're different outside of the gym. I like it."

"Can you tell my mom that?" She asked with a grin. "She thinks I'm a smartass." She came over to the couch with two plates of food and sat them down on the coffee table. Then she went back to the kitchen for glasses of water, calling over her shoulder, "Yours is very yolky. I didn't want to waste the egg yolks from mine, so I just mixed them in with yours."

"Is yolky a real word or did you just make that up?"

She wrinkled her nose as she sat down next to him. "I'm not really sure. But it gets the point across, so I don't think it really matters."

"Good point." He took a bite of his omelet and was surprised at how good it was. It was probably the best thing that had ever come from his kitchen. Payson, on the other hand, didn't think as well of the meal.

"Geez, this is so bland. I don't know how you live like this." She ate it anyway, but she was clearly displeased with the taste.

They chatted about general things as they ate, but eventually Sasha had to bring the conversation back around to topic they would probably stick to for the next month. "We're going to have to take out the Rufolva."

"I know," she said, grimacing. It was a high impact landing and too close to her stomach for her to do safely right now. "I'm lucky that's the only thing we have to change. I went through it all in my head, and that's the only skill that needs to come out, I think. Thank God you talked me into going more artistic, because my old floor would have been impossible to redesign."

Like her, he'd gone through all of her routines in his head, skill by skill, and evaluated their risk to the pregnancy. "You routines are safer now all around, I think. You've mastered the art of a light landing, and I think the less jarring your landings are the safer it will be for the baby. What do you think about the Amanar?"

She shook her head. "Not worth it. I've got the half on one and a half down cold, so I shouldn't need the Amanar. It's too shaky to have been anything but a last ditch effort anyway, so I'm not going to bother training it anymore."

That, if anything, convinced Sasha how serious Payson was about keeping the baby. Having the Amanar as a backup could make the difference between medaling or not in the event finals, and he had never seen her willingly give up a shot at a medal. She had been willing to risk paralysis to win at the Olympics, so choosing the baby over medaling said a lot.

"Okay. We'll figure out something to replace the Rufolva and knock the two and a half down to a double permanently. All considered, we're getting off pretty easy as far as the gymnastics is concerned."

After breakfast they went their separate ways for a while. Payson went shopping and Sasha went to pick up some papers at the Rock. Mainly he was just trying to find a way to talk to Kim privately. He didn't know what that conversation was going to entail and he didn't want Payson around to overhear it just in case it didn't go well.

o-O-o

When he got home a few hours later, there was a delicious smell emanating from his kitchen and Payson was watching a movie on the couch, curled up beneath his blanket. She looked up when he came in.

"I don't think this apartment has ever smelled this good before. What are you making?"

She was a little stuffy when she answered, "Roasted chicken. It has to cook for a while. I made a salad for lunch if you want some." Judging by her voice, she'd been crying. She probably waited until she was alone to do it on purpose.

He collected a plate of food and went to sit by her on the couch. "What are you watching?"

"Stick It. I was going to clean, but it's been a crappy couple of days, so I'm being lazy and watching my feel-good movie instead." Only Payson could think she was lazy for watching a movie on a Sunday afternoon after what had probably been the worst day of her life.

Instead of broaching the subject of her crappy couple of days, he asked an unobtrusive question. "What's a feel-good movie?"

She looked at him like he was stupid. "You know, the movie that is guaranteed to make you smile no matter how shitty you feel. Don't you have one?"

He shook his head no. "What's this one about?"

"Seriously? It's pretty much the only big time gymnastics movie ever made, and you don't know what it's about?" He shook his head again and she rolled her eyes. "It's a group of gymnasts and their coach challenging the system. Basically, it's us against China, but funny."

He stayed and watched the rest of the movie with her. She kept up a running commentary for his benefit and said some of the lines out loud, apparently for her own entertainment. He didn't get most of the humor, but Payson thought it was hilarious. She was right, though. It was similar to life at the Rock, in a bizarre, chick-flick way—the new girl being shunned; the gymnast working her way back after having been out of the sport; the girls being punished for who their coach was; four girls and a coach working together to change the status quo. It was bits and pieces of the Rock shoved together in one tongue in cheek movie. The main character even looked a bit like Emily.

As the credits rolled, Sasha turned to Payson and said, "I can see the similarities between the story and the Rock, but I don't think this movie was made for men."

She laughed. "Okay, maybe not, but I appreciate you watching it with me. It was nice to just, you know, be a teenager four a couple of hours. I don't think I'm going to get that opportunity very much longer."

He squeezed her foot, which as some point during the movie ended up situated in his lap, and said, "You're right. Things are going to change for you either way now, but that's not necessarily a bad thing. Everybody has to grow up eventually, and between what you've learned from gymnastics and the way your mum raised you, I've never met anyone more prepared to be an adult." He waved his hand toward the kitchen. "Hell, you're more prepared than me."

"Women are _always_ more prepared than men," she said with an eye roll. Then she paused for a minute and asked, "So, I'm assuming you only went to the Rock so that you could talk to my mom without me overhearing. How'd that go?"

"Not so great." He was reluctant to tell her about his conversation with Kim, but he knew he had to. She needed some answers about her immediate future. "Your dad isn't budging. Your mum is pushing him to let you come home, but I think, if it's okay with you, we should just let it go. It would be best for _you_ if you went home, but I don't want, and I'm certain you don't want, for this to mess with your parents' relationship."

She scrunched her eyebrows together. "No, I don't want them to fight about this. But are you sure you don't mind? This is a pretty big imposition for you."

"I don't mind at all," he said, squeezing her foot again. "Like I said last night, all I want is for you to be safe. Besides, I could get used to your cooking."

She brushed off his teasing and kept her tone serious. "You could at least let me sleep on the couch. I'm smaller than you, I'd fit better. This thing is going to kill your back if you keep sleeping on it."

"Not a chance in hell, Pay." He hated the couch, but he wasn't going to stick Payson there instead. "I can handle a few kinks in my back; you cannot. Not this close to the Olympics."

"Fine," she said, moving her legs off of his lap and standing. "If I'm going to stay her then I'm cleaning this place right now. I cannot live in a dirty apartment."

He pulled her back down and placed the phone in her hand. "Call your mum first. She needs to hear from you, and she needs to know what you decided. I'm going for a run so you can have some privacy."

When he got back from his run, Payson had already finished the conversation with her mum and started on the cleaning. Sasha tried to help, but she told him quite firmly that she had no confidence in his ability to clean and he should get out of her way. He laughed and went to do his paperwork, thinking that maybe Payson was more ready to be a mother than she thought.

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><p>AN: An FYI if you were one of the earlier readers of the last chapter—I realized belatedly that Payson's birthday had moved during the course of this fic but I forgot to change it in chapter 6. Her b-day is in a few weeks, not a couple of months. It's fixed now.

Not many reviews for the last chapter :( I need some love from my readers!

p.s. If you want to see a Rufolva go to www(dot)youtube(dot)com/watch?v=WPXn916CFSc It's at 4:06. There was a Chinese gymnast at the Pacific Rims this weekend that did it exactly the way I envisioned it for Payson, very graceful and pretty, but I sadly can't get a video of that.


	8. Chapter 8

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

A/N: Lots of chapters are getting combined lately for being too short, this one included. That means good things for you, beyoncefan, because now we only have two more chapters after this until Austin is back :)

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><p>Waking up the next morning was easier, but Payson noticed that he had switched directions on the couch. He couldn't very well explain the real reason to her, so he made an excuse about light shining through the window. He was glad he had done it, though, because she wasn't in her pajamas this morning; she was in a pair of shorts and a sports bra. They'd decided the night before that she wasn't going to come in early or stay late anymore, so instead she was going jogging. Jogging was supposed to be good for pregnant women, so she thought it would be a good way to stay in shape without risk.<p>

"Are you sure it's a good idea to go running like that?" he asked doubtfully.

"Like what?" She looked up from where she was blending a smoothie. She hadn't just bought groceries yesterday, she'd bought kitchen appliances as well.

He cast a critical glance at her bare midriff and she rolled her eyes. "Sasha, it's ninety-five degrees outside. Everybody runs in sports bras in the summer. I do it and I'm the most conservative person I know."

"Conservative? Payson, you're pregnant."

She just grinned at him. "Which only proves my point more. Apparently I'm a slut, so walking around in a sports bra is no big deal."

He blanked her. "I can't believe you just made a joke about that."

"Well," she said with a shrug, "If I don't joke about it I'm going to start crying again, and I've cried enough to last me the rest of my life. Joking is the better option right now."

"Okay, fine, run half naked. Just be careful. And if you talk to anyone from the complex, act like you're my sister."

She laughed. "Why? Are you afraid people will think you're the father or something?"

"Don't be cheeky," he admonished, pulling on her ponytail. "We're not supposed to have long-term visitors here, so I'm going to pass you off as my sister who's waiting to start CU Boulder in the fall, and even then I'll probably have to flirt with the building manager to pull it off. Luckily, we look similar enough to make it believable."

Payson leaned back against the counter and examined him closely. "I've never thought about that before. We do look a lot alike. Same hair, same eyes. It'd be easy to mistake us for siblings."

"That's what I'm counting on. Okay, I'm headed out. Take it slow, a ten-minute mile—" she made a face at his restriction "—and be at the Rock by eight. We'll work on your beam first thing."

"Yeah, yeah, whatever, Coach. Now go away." She pointed to the door to emphasize her point and Sasha couldn't help but laugh. He liked this side of her.

o-O-o

Kim beat him to the Rock. She was already in the office when he got there, pretending to do paperwork while actually shuffling papers and tapping her pen against the side of the desk. She looked up from her fake work when he came in. "Where's Payson?"

Sasha mentally slapped himself in the head. He should have realized that Kim would be at the Rock early to see Payson. "I'm sorry, Kim, she's not coming in 'til regular hours. She's cutting back her training and it never occurred to either of us that she could spend this time with you."

"She's cutting back her training?" Kim asked, surprised. "I knew she wanted to try to keep the baby, but that's a huge step for Payson. I guess… I mean… I… She's really serious about this isn't she?"

He sank down into his chair, finally giving into the exhaustion he felt now that he didn't need to be strong for Payson. "She is. It didn't really sink in for me either until she said she didn't want to train the Amanar anymore. I think she's more scared of losing the baby than actually _having_ it."

She smiled sadly at him. "You won't understand until you're going to be a father, and maybe not even then, because it's different when you're the one carrying the child. It doesn't take long to start loving the baby, even if it was unexpected. It took me about a day and a half. I think maybe it took Payson a little less than that."

"I know this is going to sound crazy, because she's so young, but the more I watch her outside the gym, the more I think she's going to be a fantastic mum. She's more ready to be a parent at seventeen than I would be now at thirty-two." He'd meant it when he called her a mother hen. She seemed to have a natural tendency to take care of others.

"If you'd said that a year ago," she said, "you would have been crazy. But now… she's grown up so much since, well, really since you started working with her more intensely. It's like when you started training her to become an artistic gymnast you uncovered this entire part of Payson that we didn't even know existed."

Sasha thought back on the Payson that he'd first met and realized just how much she had changed. When he first came to the Rock, she'd been focused on gymnastics to the exclusion of all else. That girl was a pale shadow of the vibrant young woman she'd become. "I don't think I can take any credit for it, but she certainly has changed since I met her."

"You may not take any credit for it, but I'm sure giving it to you. I actually wanted to thank you, for all that you've done for her." He started to protest her thanks, but she wouldn't let him. "No, Sasha. I mean it. We're so lucky to have you as a friend. Payson said she never would have gotten through that first morning without you, and I don't know what we would have done if you hadn't taken her in. I can't count the number of times that I've thanked God you came to the Rock."

Sasha was blushing, but he didn't try to deflect any of her praise. That would only encourage her to continue. "I'm happy to be of service, Kim. I just want what's best for Payson."

"I know you do, and I'm glad she has you there to take care of her."

Gymnasts were beginning to filter in below them, and they cut off their conversation so as not to be overheard. It was a good thing they did, too, because Summer breezed into the office not long after. Kim narrowed her eyes at her co-manager as she walked in, which caught Sasha's attention. The two women normally got along well.

"Good morning," Summer said in her too-cheerful voice, and then immediately started snooping. "Kim, how is Payson doing? I've been so worried about her."

"She's fine. I actually wanted to talk to you about that." Summer somehow seemed to miss Kim's evident anger and thought that Kim was going to confide in her. "My daughter is not like Lauren. She doesn't lie. She doesn't keep secrets from me. I'm sure that you were trying to help by calling me the other day, but it was completely unnecessary and completely unfair to Payson. If she has something to tell me she should be allowed to tell me in her own time and her own way, without you tattling on her like a kindergartener."

Kim very rarely unleashed her wrath, but she didn't hold back when she did. Summer was about to cry. "Kim, I'm so sorry if you feel like I invaded Payson's privacy, I just thought you should know what Austin was saying…"

"Wait, you called Kim after Austin's outburst?" Sasha asked, interrupting her insincere apology. "What part of it's none of your goddamn business did you not understand? Because I thought I was pretty clear about that."

"I just thought—"

Sasha cut her off. He didn't want to hear her excuse. "Summer, I think maybe you should leave. If I can't trust you with what goes on in this gym, I don't think you have a place here."

She did a spectacular impression of a fish before she stormed out of the office like a child throwing a tantrum. Kim turned to him in disbelief. "Did you just fire Summer?"

"Of course not. I just asked her to leave for the day." He couldn't keep the mischievous smirk off of his face. If Summer didn't take his dismissal as a sacking then he would have to actually fire her the next day, but he was pretty sure she got the message. He'd had enough of her shit.

Kim smiled back at him. "Well, then. If she's not going to be in today then I better get started on coordinating with the NGO and IOC about travel arrangements. I would hate to fall behind and leave the office in a mess for when she comes back."

"You do that," he said, winking at her. "In the mean time I'm going to get the gym started for the day." He left the office chuckling at their shared joke and preparing himself for the trouble that was sure to come when the rest of the gymnasts arrived.

* * *

><p>AN: Ding dong, the witch is dead. Or at least gone. I think she'll show up one more time, but I haven't written it yet so it may go by the wayside.

I need some serious review love to get me inspired again, because my brain seems to have died. I've been sitting at my computer staring at the screen, hoping that either MKB or this fic would start happening, but so far no dice. I couldn't even concentrate to proof read this. I can't even concentrate to write this note—the screen is wavering in front of my eyes. HELP!


	9. Chapter 9

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

* * *

><p>Payson wasn't in the gym when Emily arrived, which was a first. It was one of the constants in her life—Kaylie was boy crazy, Lauren was bitchy, and Payson was early. It had always been like that, as long as she'd been at the Rock. She just hoped that what happened with Austin wasn't going to keep Payson out of the gym. She had to be humiliated by what Austin said, and the Rock would be a rough place for her for a while.<p>

When Payson walked in a few minutes later, Emily checked the clock. 8:02. That was the latest Payson had ever been by about an hour and two minutes. She looked pretty confident, though. If a boy had said those kinds of things about her to the whole gym, Emily would be walking in with her head down and avoiding eye contact. Payson was doing neither.

She put her gym bag down and came over their group to stretch, ignoring the stares and whispers she was attracting. Kaylie was the first one brave enough to speak to her. "Are you okay, Payson?"

Payson just pulled her leg up into a heel stretch like everything was normal. "I'm fine, and I'd be even better if we could just _not_ talk about Austin. I'm pretty sure you got the general gist of what happened, and I _really_ don't want to give out the details, okay?"

"Yeah, sure," Emily said before either of the others could respond. She glared at Kaylie and Lauren until they agreed. Payson didn't need to be grilled by them about something that was obviously a bad experience.

"Look, I get that you don't want to talk about it," Lauren added, "but I just want you to know that if you decide you do want to, I won't be a bitch. My first time sucked, too, so if you need a friend…"

Payson's expression softened at Lauren's relatively nice words. "Thanks, Lo. I appreciate the offer."

They moved on to the much less awkward subject of vaulting and Payson started to relax a little, at least until a group of the male elites made their way over. They were all leering at Payson, but a young man named Thomas, a member of the men's national team, was the only one with enough balls to speak to her. "So, Keeler, first Belov and now Tucker. I guess we've figured out what turns you on. Olympic gold medals."

Emily was ready to jump to her defense, and she saw from the corner of her eye that Sasha was as well, but Payson handled it on her own. "You've caught me, Tom. Gold medals get me hot. I guess that means you'll never have a shot with me, huh?"

There was the usual mix of male heckling at Thomas's expense and Payson turned to walk away with the other girls following. She led them over to the beam, where Sasha was waiting for them with clipboards. Emily thought she heard him mutter "Nicely done" to Payson, but she couldn't be sure.

He handed the clipboards to her, Kaylie and Lauren. "I want you three rotating out on beam, evaluating each other just like we did yesterday. Keep in mind that you're trying to help your teammates address their errors as well as addressing your own. Stop to consider if you might be doing some of the same things that you are giving deductions for." He turned to Payson, who didn't have a clipboard. "Payson, on the tape. We're going to try a flic flac full to a handstand to replace that Rufolva."

Payson arranged her features into an interesting mixture of confusion and determination. "A full to a handstand? But no one's ever done that before."

"I think you can. If you pull it off it will be named after you."

Payson's mouth dropped open a little bit. "Wow. That would be… ironic."

"It would," he chuckled, "But if you just stand there then it will never be anything more than an ironic theory. Tape. Now."

They made their way to the beam while Payson stayed on the tape. Lauren, in an exaggerated stage whisper that probably carried to Payson and Sasha, asked, "Why are they changing her beam a month before the Olympics? That's insane."

"Scared she'll beat you, Lo?" Kaylie teased. She was joking, but she was also probably right. Lauren was currently the number one beamer in the country, but Payson was less than a tenth behind her at Nationals. This new move could push Payson out front.

Emily brushed aside Lauren's question and asked her own. "I'm more interested in why she said it would be ironic. What does that mean?"

"Irony means that what happens is the opposite of what is expected."

"Har har, Lauren. I know what irony is. I mean why does she think her new move is ironic?" It was certainly strange for her to change her beam routine so close to the Olympics, but there was nothing ironic about it that Emily could see. Sasha had agreed with her, though, so whatever it was he knew about it.

She watched Payson as much during the rotation as she did Kaylie and Lauren. As a result, her scorings were way off and she was no help to either of them, but something was going on with Payson. She was different, and it was more than just embarrassment or regret about what happened with Austin. She was throwing her tricks at full strength, but Emily couldn't shake the feeling that she was holding back somehow, and Sasha was being oddly overprotective. Normally when he was spotting them, he would let them fall as long as it wasn't dangerous. He said that you needed to finish the fall in order to understand why it happened, but he wasn't letting Payson fall at all. Whenever she misjudged her momentum, he caught her legs and let her roll out of the handstand instead of landing on her ass like she would have on her own. Something strange was going on with her.

Sasha sent them on to their floor rotation alone while he and Payson kept working her new move, now on the low beam. Since Nationals, he'd kept them in one rotation and had been with them nearly the entire time. Splitting them up was odd; ignoring their floors was even odder. They rejoined the group for vault and Emily continued to make observations. Emily trained one vault and Kaylie and Lauren, who were trying for the event final, both trained two. Payson had been training three, her two regular competition vaults and an Amanar as a backup, but today she dropped the Amanar.

Curiosity got the better of her and she asked, "You're not training the two and a half today?"

"No, Sasha and I decided it was a waste of time. It's too shaky to use, so I'm just going to concentrate on getting my double perfect." It was either the truth or a really good lie, but Emily suspected it was the latter. The harder vault wasn't perfect, but it wasn't so shaky that Payson couldn't use it if needed, and that extra seven tenths start value could make up a lot of ground.

Things just kept getting stranger as the day went on. When they finished their final rotation and were splitting up to work on individual skills, Sasha laid his hands on Payson's shoulders from behind and whispered in her ear. Emily was the only one close enough to hear what he said. "Take a break. There's some fruit in the office for you. Eat something and drink plenty of water, the come back down in half an hour."

Emily couldn't believe what she was hearing. Sasha's idea of a break was five minutes to get some water. He would kill them if they tried to take a half hour break, and here he was suggesting one. Then Payson moved and she couldn't believe what she was _seeing_. Payson nodded and left the floor, heading up to the office to presumably eat something like Sasha said. Emily had expected at least some sort of resistance from Payson. This was the girl that came early and stayed late every single day, and snipped at them when they loitered too long, and she was actually agreeing to take a long break!

Lauren and Kaylie didn't notice and Emily chose not to point it out to them. Payson was a very private person. Whatever was going on, she probably wanted to keep it to herself. But both of the other girls noticed when, at three thirty, a full hour and a half before the training day was over, Sasha looked at the clock on the wall and asked, "Isn't it about time for you to leave?"

Payson followed his gaze to the clock. "Yeah, it is. I'd better go change."

Once she rounded the corner to the locker room, Lauren, with all her usual tact, said, "Did Payson just leave practice early? Is the world ending?"

"Well, it is 2012, so maybe," Emily said, hoping to distract her teammates. It worked, but Sasha was giving her a pretty penetrating look. He was a very perceptive man, so he probably knew that she had caught all of his and Payson's strange behavior. Hopefully he also knew that she wasn't going to point it out to the others.

* * *

><p>AN: I'm sorry, I think I freaked a lot of you out when I mentioned my writer's block. Believe me, it's still there, but it won't affect this fic. I've already got 95k words of this written, so the updates will continue every two days :) MKB and C&M, on the other hand, are both kicking my ass. I know what's going to happen in MKB, I just can't seem to make it go on the page. Grrr.


	10. Chapter 10

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

A/N: It's chapters like these that make me regret making stupid decisions like never writing from the main character's perspective. It leads me to interesting places sometimes, like writing from Valeri Liukin's POV in MKB because I couldn't write from Kelly's, but it is incredibly hard to write an OB appointment from someone else's viewpoint. I could never have done this without the help of poppetrussell, so a HUGE thanks to her.

* * *

><p>Kim knew that Payson was nervous. It was one thing to know that you were pregnant, but another thing altogether to hear it come from a doctor. During her first appointment, Kim had been so nervous that she threw up <em>and<em> cried. She'd been terrified at the prospect of having a child, and it was even worse for Payson because she had to be scared about having the baby and about _not_ having the baby. She confided in Kim on the drive over that, even though she was putting up a good front about accepting the circumstances after the Olympics, she was actually out of her mind with fear that she might miscarry. Kim miscarried once between Payson and Becca and it had been the most devastating experience of her life. She didn't want her daughter to go through that.

Payson was holding her hand so tightly that she was losing circulation, but when the doctor came in her daughter immediately relaxed her grip. She imagined he probably had this kind of calming effect on most of his patients, because even though he was considered one of the best obstetricians in Boulder, there was no denying that he looked like Santa Claus. Kim felt confident leaving her daughter in his care but, still, there was no way not to be amused by the idea of Father Christmas delivering a baby. She almost wished that Payson would be due in late December instead of March.

He addressed his patient first. "Good afternoon. I am Dr. Lehmann, and you would be Payson, I presume?" he asked, smiling at her. He had a very kind smile.

She smiled back, which was a pretty large accomplishment considering how nervous she was. "Yes, sir."

"And who is this lovely young lady with you?" He asked, turning to Kim, who couldn't help but find his German accent charming and his words flattering.

Payson answered with an amused tone. "This is my mom, Kim Keeler."

"Well, it is nice to meet you both." He shook hands with each of them and then sat down on a rolling stool. "So, Payson, you think you are pregnant?"

"Yes, sir. I took a pregnancy test this last Saturday and it was positive." She'd told Kim that she took the test based on a sneaking suspicion. As a professional athlete she was extremely aware of her body, and she said that something just felt _different_.

"Well, we are running your blood work just to be sure, but until then we will assume your home test was correct. When was you last period?"

Payson eyes twinkled and Kim knew why. She might be scared and anxious, but she wasn't above getting a little enjoyment out of surprising people. "About a year ago." He just raised his eyebrows in question, so she elaborated, "I'm an elite gymnast. We train too hard to get our periods."

"An elite gymnast? Well, that would certainly explain it. You broke through some rather extraordinary odds to get pregnant under those kinds of physical conditions." _Tell me about it_, Kim thought. She'd never considered pregnancy as a possible problem for Payson. "And are you still doing gymnastics?"

"Yes, sir. That is actually my biggest question. I'm going to the Olympics next month, and I wanted to know what the impact on the baby will be. Will I still be able to have a healthy baby after I compete?" The anxiety was clear in her voice and her fingers were clenched around the edge of the table. This is what they had both been waiting to hear.

He examined Payson's face closely for several seconds and then answered. "Well, I have to tell you that it would be best if you no longer did gymnastics for the duration of the pregnancy. But I think you already know that. So, assuming that you are going to compete no matter what I say, I will give you a conditional yes. The body is built to protect the internal organs, including the uterus."

Payson visibly relaxed and Kim thought she heard her utter the words "Thank God." The she was focused again and asking, "What are the conditions?"

"First, you must know that I cannot guarantee the pregnancy. The chance of miscarriage will be higher for you due to the stress you put on your body." Kim winced, knowing it was true but not wanting to hear it from the doctor's lips. That made it too real. "Second, you must follow some instructions to keep the baby safe. The body has many shock absorbers, especially in the arms and legs, and your baby is suspended in fluid so that it may move without jarring, but any hard impact to or near your stomach could cause irreparable damage."

Payson nodded. "We've already taken care of that. I only had one skill where I didn't land on my feet and we replaced it this morning." She'd retreated into her competitive mindset—make a plan, get it done, and don't think too hard about the outcome.

"Good, very good. You are being very responsible. It is good to see that in a young woman." He said, patting her on the knee. "Also, you must reduce the amount of exercise you do. I do not do gymnastics, so I do not know what your day is like, but I am sure that if you are going to the Olympics you must do much work. For you, the less exercise the better, and you must take breaks."

"Done. I cut my training back to the standard eight hours and built breaks into that time. A half hour in the morning and a half hour in the afternoon, and then shorter breaks between each apparatus." Kim knew that Payson was cutting back her training, but apparently Sasha had sat down with her daughter and come up with a definitive plan. Payson took a long break this morning, but it hadn't occurred to Kim that it was a scheduled break.

"Good, good," he said, nodding his white-haired, rosy-cheeked head. "It sounds like you have thought this through. You have taken good precautions. It is no guarantee, but this will help to keep your baby safe and healthy. Some women I must pound caution into their heads, but you I think do not need that. You will be careful on your own, I think, but we will still be careful together. You will have frequent checkups while you are doing gymnastics. Now, do you have any idea how far along you might be?"

"I know exactly how far I am," Payson said, blushing lightly. Knowing the exact date of conception was as good as admitting to a one night stand. "I'm four weeks."

"Ah, you mean four weeks since conception, yes? That means the gestational age is six weeks. We start counting from the beginning of the menstrual cycle, and conception occurs in the middle. Since you do not have a normal cycle, we will add on the standard two weeks." Kim was pretty sure she should have known that, but she had her babies a long time ago. If she knew it at one point she had certainly forgotten it since.

Payson was frowning. "So that means I'll be eleven weeks at the Olympics instead of nine. Is there any possibility that I'll I be showing then?"

"I do not think so. It is different for every woman, but you have wide hips," he said, gesturing toward Payson's midsection. "The baby will have plenty of room to grow before your stomach needs to expand." He stood up from his stool and rolled a machine over to Payson side. "Now, we have much tedious business to do. I will ask you many many questions and then we will ask your mother to step out so I can examine you, but we will do the fun part first. Lie back and we will take a look at you baby."

Watching Payson as she got her first ultrasound, Kim was reminded of the first time she saw Payson on that screen. It was one of the stand-out moments in her life, when it first really hit her that she had created a life. Despite the less than ideal circumstances of her pregnancy, Kim had never once regretted having Payson. She hoped that Payson would feel the same way about her child.

Payson was staring at the monitor with awe on her face as the doctor explained the image, and Kim was staring at Payson with equal awe. Seeing your baby never got less wonderful, even when that baby was seventeen years old and having a child of her own. Kim didn't understand what was on the screen—she'd had her first ultrasound at twenty weeks, so what Payson was seeing looked completely different—but Payson seemed to follow what Dr. Lehmann was pointing out to her. He smiled and said, "This is not the best part. _This_ is the best part." He reached over and turned a knob, allowing a soft swooshing sound to permeate the room. The baby's heartbeat.

"Oh my God."Payson was crying, unable to tear her eyes away from the screen, watching the tiny pulsing on the monitor that indicated her child's life. She wiped her eyes and laughed. "I thought winning at Worlds was amazing. This is like a million times better than that."

o-O-o

Sasha was sitting on the couch watching footage of the elite girls, looking for even the smallest of errors to correct before the Olympics. They weren't making any changes to the routines, simply analyzing and correcting minutia instead. It was the reason that Payson could reasonable cut back on her practice by so much. Her execution was nearly flawless already, so she just needed to maintain her skills.

She didn't say anything to him when she came home. She just went to the TV console, switched out his DVD for one that she was holding in her hand, and came to sit beside him. She leaned against him and pressed play. A grainy black and white image popped up on his television.

"Is that…?"

She nodded and he wrapped his arm around her shoulders, pulling her in closer. "Yeah, that's my baby. See that little fluttering right there?" she asked, pointing to the screen. "That's his heart. Isn't this the most amazing thing you've ever seen?"

Sasha looked down to where she was nestled in the crook of his arm. "His? Isn't it too early to know that? It doesn't even look like a baby yet."

"Call it a gut feeling. It is way too early to tell, but I just think he's going to be a boy. Although I did find out that I'm actually at six weeks, not four. The way they count it basically adds on two weeks." She pulled back a little so that they were eye to eye. "Just so you know, assuming everything works out, I'm going to name him after you."

He was stunned, and touched, and completely honored. He didn't know how to express his gratitude for the gesture, so he just made a joke, knowing that she would understand his deeper feelings. "So, Sasha Jr, huh?"

She elbowed him in the ribs and then sank back against him. "Definitely not. We'll call him Alex."

"And if it's a girl?"

"Still naming her after you. It'll just be Alexandra instead of Alexandru, and we'll call her Aly," she said, then smiled mischievously. "Or I guess we could call _her_ Sasha, since it is a girl's name."

"It is not," he pouted, putting on airs to make her laugh. "It's you Americans who got it backward. You started calling your girls by boys' names."

She stuck her tongue out at him and he pinched her arm, both laughing. Then they both sat back and watched the video of Payson's ultrasound on repeat for a while. She was the first one to break the silence. "Dr. Lehmann said I was doing everything right as far as training goes. I've been trying not to hope these last few days in case it didn't go well, but now… But because I'm hoping, if I lose him now, I don't think I'll ever recover."

He brushed her tears away with his thumb and said, "Well then, we'll just have to make sure you don't lose him. Or her."

She half sobbed, half laughed. "Him."

"Her."

She settled back against him and he dropped a kiss on top of her head. "So, other than your appointment, how was the day with your mum?"

"It was nice," she said, burrowing into his chest. "I'm so used to seeing her all the time that it feels weird to have to make time to be together. But it was nice, even though it was hard not talking about the baby during dinner. I think we both bit our lip about a hundred times each trying to cut off something that shouldn't be said in public. It will be such a relief after the Olympics when I can just be honest about it."

"It will fly by. There'll be so much going on in the next five weeks that you'll wonder how it went by so quickly." He remembered how fast the weeks leading up to Sydney seemed to go for him, and Payson had much more going on than he did. She wouldn't know what hit her. "Speaking of, let's go over your bars, make sure you're ready for London."

He switched the video back to their routines and cued up Payson's bars. They analyzed every little detail and then moved on to her floor and vault. They would re-shoot her balance beam later that week with her new skill. She stayed and helped him to evaluate the other girls' routines, as well, until she fell asleep against his chest and he carried her into the bedroom.

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><p>AN: Two exciting things. 1) Austin will be back next chapter. 2) I'M WRITING AGAIN! I had an epic case of writer's block, so bad that I couldn't even write an email, much less a chapter, but Creatively Licensed B broke it for me. She reminded me of all the things I love so much about MKB and all of a sudden the words were flowing again.

I'm so obsessive about detail that I have to mention this. I took a little creative license with the ultrasound. I did LOTS of research and looks at dozens of ultrasounds at 6 weeks, and seeing the heartbeat is a toss up. It's about a 50/50 chance for there to be a heartbeat then, so I put Payson in the half that could see it. Also, the sound she heard is a computer simulation. You can't hear the real heartbeat until several weeks later.


	11. Chapter 11

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

A/N: Grrr! I'm so frustrated with being busy. Okay, enough complaining. Let's see if I can make Ida feel sorry for Austin...

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><p>He was standing with Marty, discussing an error in his high bar routine, when the doors opened on the other side of the gym. He turned toward the entrance and found himself looking straight into Payson Keeler's eyes. She was standing frozen like a deer in the headlights, staring at him every bit as much as he was staring at her. Lauren, Kaylie, and Emily were gathered around her, swinging their head back and forth between them like a group of tennis spectators, and Lauren's voice rang through the gym, "What's <em>he<em> doing here?"

Sasha noticed where they were looking and urged them on toward the stairs. Once they were on their way to the office again, he turned and started his way across the gym.

Austin turned to Marty in desperation. "What are they doing here?"

"The women's Olympic team has a meeting here today with NGO representatives. Is this a problem?" He hadn't told Marty why he switched gyms, and it seemed like news of his tirade hadn't left the Rock. That was a near miracle, but he was glad, both for himself and for Payson. He regretted his actions almost as soon as he was out of the gym. He didn't want to hurt Payson. He loved her. He was just so overwhelmed by all that had happened that he freaked out, and he'd probably lost Payson and the baby for good because of it. It'd been a week and she hadn't spoken to him since.

"No, it's not a problem," he said when his mouth caught up to his brain. "I just don't get why they're having it here. Isn't the Rock their team gym?"

Marty rolled his eyes, as gesture that looked odd on the older man. "It is, but the NGO suits are too lazy to drive there, so they made the girls drive to them."

When Sasha reached them, he clapped his hand on Marty's back in greeting. "Marty. Tucker, I didn't realize you were training here now." It wasn't a question, but Austin read the deeper meaning in the words: _What the hell are you doing here?_

Austin didn't give him anything. "Yeah, I am."

"Well, I think you should take the day off."

He bristled. He hated when people ordered him around, and he was still angry with Sasha for accusing him of raping Payson. "You're not my coach anymore, Sasha. You can't tell me what to do."

"I'm not telling you what to do," he answered, refusing to rise to the bait. "I'm making a suggestion. She's not ready to see you yet. If you care about her at all, which she seems to think you do, then you will respect that and give her some space. Let her come to you on her own terms."

Shit. He couldn't argue with that. He didn't want to impose himself on Payson, not after what he had already put her through. He was about to agree when Marty interrupted. "Okay, someone needs to tell me what the hell is going on here."

"Stay out of it, Marty." He and Sasha said it at the same time and Austin almost smiled. Before all of this shit went down, they had gotten along really well. Austin had always resented the time that he spent with Payson, but he liked and respected him nonetheless. He decided to give in for now. "Fine, I'll go. But she can't avoid me forever. Sooner or later we're going to have to talk."

Sasha nodded. "She knows, and I'm sure she'll be by to see you soon."

Austin left, but he overheard the other men as he walked away. Marty was asking, "Is that why he left the Rock, because he messed around with one of the girls?"

"Drop it, Marty," Sasha answered. "It doesn't concern you."

o-O-o

Finding out that Payson was pregnant had been the biggest shock of his life. Finding out that he had slept with her was the next biggest shock of his life. The third biggest shock had been opening his front door on Sunday morning to find her on his welcome mat.

"Wow. When Sasha said you would be by to see me soon, he wasn't lying." He probably should have said something like 'It's good to see you' or 'I'm glad you came,' but he had never been great at saying the right things at the right time.

She winced. Yep, he'd said the wrong thing. "Yeah, I'm sorry, Austin. I know I should have talked to you sooner, but…"

"You weren't ready," he finished for her, sparing her from finding an excuse. She flashed a weak smile and nodded, indicating that he said the right thing for once.

"Yeah. Can I come in?"

"What?" he asked, and then looked around and noticed they were still on the porch. "Oh, yeah, definitely. I'm sorry, I'm not so great with normal social behavior. I don't think about things like inviting people in."

She snorted. "Do you ever think about _anything_?" He tensed and she winced again. "Sorry. I guess I'm not so great with normal social behavior, either."

She held up a jewel case she was carrying so that he could see the disk inside. "I had an ultrasound Monday. I thought you might want to see."

"Uh, yeah. So that's a picture of our baby?" He didn't know what he was expecting from this visit, but it certainly wasn't the chance to see his child.

"Better," she said, walking over to his TV and crouching down beside it. "It's a video of our baby. Come here." She held her hand out to him and he joined her and took hold of it. It was funny, he was having a child with this woman, but this was the first time they'd ever even held hands.

She turned on the DVD and he was faced with a big blob of black, white, and grey. "Okay, Pay, you're going to have to explain this to me, because I have no idea what I'm looking at."

She giggled. Actually giggled. "I figured. That's why we're over here on the floor, so I can point this stuff out to you. You see this black bubble?"

She traced a circle around what looked kind of like a bean. "Yeah. That's the baby?"

"No, that's where the baby is going to grow. See this lump over on the side of the bubble?" He nodded yes and she continued, "That's the baby."

He frowned at the TV. "That doesn't look like a baby."

"No it doesn't," she said, giggling again. "It's too early to see a head and feet or anything. He's just started to grow, but he'll get bigger every day until he looks like a little bitty person."

"He?"

She blushed. It made her look even more beautiful. "I don't know that. It will be a few more months before I know that for sure. I just think he's a boy." She averted her eyes like she was embarrassed and then changed the subject. "You haven't seen the best part yet. Look right here."

He squinted at where she was pointing. It looked like something was moving there. "What is that?"

She was smiling, the kind of smile that he hadn't seen on her in a long while. "That's his heart beating."

"Wow. That's… Wow." He couldn't believe it. The baby was barely even a smudge on the screen, but it had a heartbeat. That was the most amazing thing he'd ever seen. "Payson… what's going to… the Olympics…" He couldn't formulate a real sentence. He wasn't even entirely sure what he was trying to ask, but Payson seemed to understand.

"The doctor thinks there's a really good chance that I'll make it through the Olympics without any complications, and I'm doing everything I can to make sure that happens. I've cut my training way back, and I'm going to get ultrasounds every week for a while to make sure the baby is still okay."

She'd cut her training back a month before the Olympics. Because of him. If she lost in London it would be his fault. "Payson, I'm so sorry."

"For what?" she asked with an ironic smile. "For having sex with me while you were drunk, or for getting me pregnant, or for how you acted when I told you?"

"All of it." Last time he'd let her words piss him off, but he wasn't going to do that this time. He kept telling himself that she had a right to be angry with him. "I know you're mad at me, Payson. I'm mad at me too. I've been trying to get a shot with you for months, and when I finally did I blew it as bad as I possibly could."

"That's an understatement," she muttered. Then she turned to look at him again and he was sure that she could see into his soul. "Why did you do it? Why did you push me to drink that night? What was in it for you?"

He started to answer but then fell flat. He didn't know. He vaguely remembered encouraging Payson to drink more champagne, and refilling her glass whenever she ran out, but didn't know why. "Honestly? I don't have a clue. I wasn't planning anything, if that's what you thought. I don't think I ever even stopped to think about what I was doing. I know I messed up, Payson, but I would do anything to make that up to you."

"Then do it," she said, sitting up on her knees. "Make it up to me. Give me what that night should have been."

"Payson, that's not a good—" His words cut off as she pressed her lips to his, and suddenly he didn't remember why he was protesting at all. He'd wanted this for months, and he loved her, and they were having a baby together, so what would be so bad about them sleeping together again?

He didn't know how they got to the bedroom, but at least this time his memory lapse was cause by passion instead of alcohol. Their clothes had gone by the wayside on their way to his room and he paused to admire the beauty of Payson's body as she lay beneath him on the bed. She was the most gorgeous woman he had ever seen.

"Are you sure?" Stopping now might kill him, but he wasn't going to push her. He didn't want to lose her again. Her only response was to reach up and pull him down by the neck until their lips crashed together once more.

He made sure this time was good for her. It'd been a long time since he'd been with a woman, if you didn't count his last night with Payson, but he remembered a thing or two about how to please one. Judging by Payson's response, he'd remembered correctly. As the laid together after, panting and covered in sweat, he said, "I wish I could go back in time and make this our first time together."

She surprised him by pulling away and wiping away a tear as it rolled down her cheek. "I wish so, too. Maybe then I wouldn't hate you so much."

He didn't know what to say. He had no idea where this was coming from. After those first awkward minutes everything had seemed to go so well between them, and she had asked for this. He knew she'd enjoyed it, too, so why was she suddenly so angry with him?

She got out of bed and started to collect her clothes, putting on each item as she reached it. She paused at the door, pulling on her jeans, but she didn't turn around to face him. "You were right last week," she said, "I do wish my first time had been with Sasha."

Then she left, and Austin was too stunned to stop her. By the time he finally recovered enough to put on his boxers and chase after her, she was in her car and pulling out of his driveway. He punched the front door and sank down to the ground, and for the first time since his little sister was in the hospital, Austin Tucker cried.

* * *

><p>AN: I know I haven't responded to anyone in a while (Sorry, I'm _really_ busy!) but please don't stop reviewing! Reviews make my lunch breaks good :)

Did I make you feel sorry for Austin? Especially you, Ida ;) I'm making it a goal to make you like him :)

The next chapter of MKB is almost done. This is why I'm complaining so much about being busy :) I want to post so badly! I may stay up late tonight and get it done and posted.


	12. Chapter 12

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

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><p>Sasha had gotten used to the sight of Payson in his apartment, cooking or cleaning or just watching TV, so he got worried when he came home and didn't see her. Her car was in the parking lot. She was home, which meant that she must be in the bedroom. He walked in that direction and, as he neared the door, heard sobbing. Oh, God.<p>

He rushed to the bedroom and found her lying in bed with her head buried in the pillow, crying with a fervor that he hadn't seen since the first day she found out she was pregnant. "Christ, Payson, what happened. Is it the baby?"

She couldn't manage words, but she shook her head no. He sat on the bed next to her and shifted her so that she was crying against his chest instead of smothering herself in the pillow. "Talk to me, Pay. What's wrong?"

"I am a horrible person." She was hyperventilating and he could barely understand her, but he was able to make out what she said and didn't have a clue what it meant.

He grasped her by the arms and used his coaching voice to say, "Payson, calm down! This isn't good for the baby."

She was conditioned to respond to him when she used that tone, so she calmed down immediately. Her tears slowed and she hiccupped herself out of her hyperventilation. "Oh, God, Sasha, I'm such a horrible person. I shouldn't even be allowed to raise a child."

"What happened? Why do you think you're a horrible person?" He couldn't imagine what could have happened in the few hours he was at the Rock that would make Payson react like this.

"I had sex with Austin." He didn't understand what was going on. He knew she'd felt guilty about that night for a long time, but he thought she'd moved past it. Then she continued and he understood all too well. "I went over to his house this morning, to talk to him and show him the ultrasound. And I started it and it was wonderful, but afterward I said the most horrible things to him. I don't even know why, I don't know why I said it. He'll never forgive me, Sasha, not after the things that I said. He'll never forgive me."

He couldn't believe what he was hearing. This wasn't like Payson, and he couldn't believe that she'd been as cruel as she said she had. "I'm sure he'll forgive you Payson. You forgave him for the things that he said."

She shook her head and droplets of water spilled onto her neck from the stream flowing down her cheeks. "It's not the same, Sasha. What he said was because he was surprised and hurt and angry, he didn't do it on purpose. I did. I knew exactly what I was doing. I said exactly what I knew would hurt him most."

"What did you say?" Part of him knew he shouldn't be asking, but the part of him that controlled his mouth was too curious to resist. He couldn't imagine what she might have said that was so bad.

"I told him that I hated him, and I… I said that I wished it had been you. I knew, I knew that there was nothing I could have possibly said that would hurt him more. I said it on purpose just because I knew how much it would hurt him."

She was right. That would hurt him worse than anything else. One of the few things that was clear in this mess was that Austin was incredibly jealous of his relationship with Payson. There was absolutely nothing romantic going on between them, and the people who mattered most knew that, but Austin didn't seem to believe it. What she said to him was cruel, crueler than Sasha could have imagined Payson was capable, and he didn't understand what could have led to it.

"You said you don't know why you said it?" he asked, and she shook her head that no, she didn't. She needed to understand her feelings before she could deal with them, so he channeled his inner psychologist to help her. "Okay, well let's start at the beginning. You said you started it. Why?"

She sniffled and reached for a tissue to wipe her eyes, calming as his rational side grounded her. "Is it too early to blame it on pregnancy hormones? Because honestly, I think that's what it was. We were just sitting together looking at the ultrasound and he was being so nice and talking about how long he had wanted to be with me and how he wished he could make it up to me and I just… I wanted him to. I wanted him to make it up to me. I wanted a _good_ memory."

"And how did you feel after? Hurt, angry?" The last thing he wanted to be discussing was Payson's feelings about sex, but she needed to do it and her mum wasn't there, so the job fell to him.

"I didn't—I was fine. I wasn't really happy, but I was, I don't know, content, maybe? But then he said that he wanted to go back and change it, and I just thought, what right does he have to regret that night? He doesn't remember it, he didn't even care when he thought he hooked up with some random girl. It was nothing to him, but it was one of the worst nights of my life. It was one of the worst nights of my life and he was too drunk to even care!" She was rambling; he didn't think she even knew what she was saying anymore. He grasped her arms again made her look at him.

"Payson, does he know any of this? Have you told him how you felt that night?" She shook her head and averted her eyes. "You have to talk to him about this. If you can't be honest with him about your feelings then you're just going to keep lashing out, and that's not fair to either of you."

She kept her eyes turned away from him as she answered, "I don't think I can. I don't think I can face him."

"You have to," he said, drawing her back against his chest. "This isn't just about you and Austin, it's about the baby. You can't spend the rest of your life avoiding his father."

She cast her eyes up at him and smiled a very small, very watery smile. "You said his."

"I meant hers," he teased.

"His."

"Hers." It'd become a bit of a running joke between them, and it was guaranteed to make Payson smile. He'd employed this method several times within the last week to help her whenever she sank into melancholy. So far it worked every time.

"Fine," she said, wiping the rest of her tears away with the back of her forearm. "I'll try to talk to him again tomorrow. But if I come home like this again, I'm blaming you."

"I'm okay with that. I can handle a little blame." Then he slapped her lightly on the thigh and said, "Now go make my lunch."

She laughed softly, just as he planned. He wanted to make her smile. She was well aware that he was joking. He'd told her many times that she didn't have to cook for him, but she insisted that under no circumstances was he allowed into the kitchen. He felt guilty about it for a few days, until he eventually realized that she liked the cooking and liked taking care of him. It gave her a sense of control and stability that was otherwise lacking in her life, which had been turned upside down in every way possible.

She actually did go make lunch for them, and by the time they sat down on the couch with a sandwich and a bowl of soup each, she was calm. It wasn't until they finished eating that she turned to him and asked, "Sasha, be honest with me. Am I a horrible person for what I did today?"

She wasn't just talking about the things she said to hurt Austin. She was asking about her actions, too, about seducing a man that she didn't love for a few moments of physical pleasure. He just wasn't sure if she wanted him to give her absolution or condemnation.

"No, you're not. You're a very confused, very scared person, but you're not horrible at all. I promise."

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><p>AN: Sorry this one was a little short, but the conversation with Austin next chapter is long, so I couldn't really combine them. We're getting really close to the second major arc of the story now!


	13. Chapter 13

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

A/N: I've mentioned to a few of you that a theme in the first part of the story is that Payson does something really out of character and then someone says, wow, that was really out of character for her. So, fair warning for this chapter :)

* * *

><p>All through practice Austin kept pulling out his phone and re-reading Payson's message.<p>

_I'm sorry. I didn't mean any of it._

_Can we talk 2morrow so I can explain?_

She was coming to his house when he got home, and he was nervous about it. He knew she didn't mean what she said, almost as soon as the words were out of her mouth, but that didn't stop the pain he felt. It was like cutting yourself with a dull knife instead of a sharp one—the cut wasn't as deep, but it still hurt like hell. He was still bleeding a bit from Payson's cut.

It was a miracle that he got through practice without hurting himself, considering how distracted he was. He didn't stick a single landing all day, and he nearly killed himself when he missed a dangerous release move on high bar. Marty sent him home early after that, telling him not to come back until his mind was clear enough to pay attention.

When he got home, a full hour earlier than normal, he was surprised to see Payson's car in his drive way. It was empty and Payson was nowhere in sight. He walked through his house and out to his backyard to look for her there, and saw a small figure in the distance, sitting on a wooden dock jutting into the lake. He made is way over to her.

"What are you doing here so early?" he asked, dropping down to sit beside her.

She managed a weak smile in his direction. "I could ask you the same thing."

"Marty sent me home after I fell off the high bar and almost killed myself."

She huffed out a small laugh at his expense and then said, "I just came from the doctor's office, and I didn't want to go home for just an hour. I thought maybe sitting out here for a while would help clear my mind."

"Funny, that's what Marty told me. 'Clear my mind.' I don't think that's possible anymore." There was a long, awkward pause before he asked, "So, what did the doctor say?"

"I made it through one more week okay. If I can just make it through the next three and a half weeks we should hopefully be in the clear." She had an odd lilt to her voice, like she was sitting on the dock with him but her mind was somewhere else, miles away.

He thought that if he didn't bring it up, she might never do it, so he bit the bullet and asked, "What happened yesterday, Payson? I thought things were going really well."

She turned to look at him and he could see in her eyes that she was back from wherever her mind had wandered a minute before. "They were. But then I got angry. You hurt me so I wanted to hurt you, and I said the things that I knew would hurt you the most."

"Payson, I'm sorry about the things I said that day, really. I've regretted them ever since."

"It wasn't what you said that hurt me, it was what you did. That night in St. Louis was one of the worst nights of my life, maybe _the_ worst, and you didn't even care. It didn't even faze you that you'd had sex with someone and didn't remember it. I mean, we were together all night, did it even _occur_ to you to ask me what happened?" Her voice was taking on a hysterical tinge, and tears were streaming down her face. He had no idea that she had been holding this back.

"It… it didn't. I just figured that I had hooked up with someone to try to forget about you." He never would have asked Payson about that night, because the last thing he wanted was her to see him as some kind of playboy. One night stands weren't his style, and hadn't been for a long time, so he was a little ashamed when he woke up the next morning. "Payson, I know you're upset, but I honestly don't understand. I get that it wasn't, uh, _enjoyable_ for you, but it's like that for a lot of people. My first time was weird and awkward, and I came too soon, and I was completely embarrassed. What was so bad that it made it the worst night of your life?"

She shook her head, like he was missing something obvious. "It's different for girls, Austin. For guys losing your virginity is about status, an accomplishment to be checked off your list. It's not like that for us. You were embarrassed, but I was _ashamed_. It was humiliating, Austin. I felt like a complete slut, and it hurt, and I couldn't move because you were on top of me, and you weren't there to make any of it better. I felt _used_, Austin, like a goddamn condom that you just tossed in the trash because once you got off you didn't need it anymore. I sat on your bathroom floor crying for an hour before I could manage to leave, and you were too drunk to even notice."

He flinched at her graphic analogy, but it got her point across loud and clear. "Christ, Payson, I had no idea it had been like that. No wonder you hate me."

"I don't hate you," she said, her voice coming down from the high pitch she's been using. "I hate myself."

"You shouldn't."

She turned the full force of her stormy eyes on him, and he was so hypnotized that he barely even noticed when she leaned forward and kissed him. She nudged her tongue against his lip and he responded out of pure instinct, letting her deepen the kiss and attack him like a feral animal. It wasn't until she swung around to straddle his legs that his common sense managed to overpower his reptilian brain.

"Payson, stop!" he yelled as he pulled away from her. "We can't do this."

She gripped the lapels of his leather jacket and screamed, "Why not? You took what you wanted from me and left me to deal with the consequences, so why can't I take what I want from you?"

"You were hysterical a few seconds ago, and you just said you hated yourself for having sex with me. You don't want this! Not really."

"Don't tell me what I want," she said, shoving against his chest. "I want to be a normal teenager, one who has sex and actually enjoys it. Don't you get that this is it for me? I'm not going to get another shot, not any time soon, probably not for years. Nobody's going to want to date the teenage mom. I'm not asking you to marry me, I'm just asking for a few months. Just a few months of normalcy. You owe me that much."

He searched her face and found what he was looking for—certainty. She was telling the truth. She wanted this; she wanted to be normal for just a few months before she gave into her fate. It might destroy what was left his heart, but he couldn't bring himself to say no. So, just like he did yesterday, he asked, "Are you sure?" And just like yesterday, her only response was to kiss him.

They stumbled their way back to his house, never letting go of each other, not knowing where they were stepping. Halfway through his yard they tripped; he wasn't sure if there was something in their path or if their legs were just too tangled together to work. He caught himself with one knee and one hand as they fell, slowing their decent and lowering Payson to the ground with no jarring impact. They didn't bother to get up, and Austin found himself thankful for the high stone walls that surrounded most of his property and shielded them from view.

They didn't notice the rest of the world for quite a long time. He remembered the jumble of sensations and emotions he always associated with sex, intensified because it was with Payson, and then her intense passion was gone and she was her normal self again, like she was before the hook up. They laid together talking about nonsense things and pointing out shapes in the clouds, and when they made love again Payson laughingly insisting that she be on top because the grass was prickly beneath her. He allowed himself to forget that she didn't love him the way he loved her, instead focusing on making memories of what was unquestionably one of the best experiences of his life. She was relishing her brief time as a normal teenager; he was relishing his brief time of intimacy with her.

They were lying together on the grass, Austin in his boxers and Payson in nothing at all, enjoying the quiet and the warm breeze that was caressing their bodies, when Payson broke the silence. "There's something you should know… and you're probably going to be angry about it."

He sat up and managed to rasp through the knot of dread in his stomach, "What?"

She sat up with him, completely ignoring her state of nudity, but he was too nervous about what she was going to say to notice her body. "I'm living with Sasha."

"What?" he repeated, unable to string together a real question. His brain had temporarily stopped working, suspended in a state of surprise and unable to process the information. She was living with Sasha. What did that mean?

"My dad kicked me out. I can't get an apartment because I'm seventeen, so I'm staying with Sasha until I'm old enough to sign a lease somewhere." She was biting her lip, searching his face for a reaction.

What was his reaction? Anger? Jealousy? Confusion? Confusion sounded the most right. She was living with Belov… but she'd just spent the last couple of hours making love to him, and she was sitting naked in his back yard right now like nothing was wrong. "I don't… I don't understand."

"Listen, Austin," she said, taking his hand, "I know you think there's something going on between me and Sasha, but there's not. You're the only person I have something going on with. Sasha's just a friend, and a really great coach who cares about us a lot. He's even the one who convinced me to get over my embarrassment and come work things out with you."

He didn't really hear what she said because he was still struggling to comprehend her living situation. "Doesn't he have a one bedroom apartment?" He'd been over to Sasha's place once before, when he was dating Kaylie, to talk about some concerns he had about her recovery. He remembered that it was smallish, and he was almost certain that there was only one bedroom. No matter what Payson said about being 'just friends,' he couldn't move past the idea of her sharing a bed with Belov.

"He's sleeping on the couch, Austin. I swear, there is nothing going on between us." She sounded sincere, but still…

"Why stay with him, though? Why not just move in with me?"

She frowned, but he thought it was more because she was trying to work out her response than because she was upset with him. At least he hoped so. "That would be a bad idea in a lot of ways, I think. If I was living here, it would be too easy to start playing house, especially if we're doing this."—she indicated the space between their bodies—"It would be easy to just slip into a relationship that wasn't real, and that would hurt everybody in the end. Us and the baby."

"What if it was real?" he asked, reluctant to put his feelings out there knowing that she didn't feel the same way.

"It's not." Her tone left no room for argument. "You said you would give me what I want, Austin. I want this. I want sex, and a chance to pretend like I'm normal for a little while. And then I want it to be over. I'm not looking for 'til death do us part."

He'd never seen this side of her before, and he wasn't sure he liked it. The Payson he knew, the Payson he loved, was sweet and innocent and would have hated the idea of having sex without a relationship. This Payson was hard and cold, and she had shown up out of nowhere. Passion and desperation he understood. Calculation he didn't.

She'd been right before, though. He had no right to deny her anything she wanted. He'd fucked up every aspect of her life because he'd been an idiot and pushed her to drink. It all came back to that. She wouldn't have had sex with him if she wasn't drunk, and she wouldn't have gotten drunk if he hadn't pushed so hard. It was his fault that her life was falling apart around her and he owed it to her to make it better in any way possible. If casual sex was really what she wanted, he had to give it to her with no complaints, even if it did break his heart.

"Fine, I get it," he said, moving the conversation back toward the original subject. "We can't live together. But that doesn't mean I'm comfortable with you living with Belov."

"You don't have to be comfortable with it. You just have to accept it. That's the way it is." Then, just as suddenly as she came, the cold, hard Payson was gone and warm, smiling Payson was back. She leaned forward and kissed him, smiling against his lips. "There's nothing going on between me and Sasha. I'll prove it to you."

And she did. He allowed himself to be drawn in again, pretending every bit as much as she was. She was pretending she was just a regular teenager fooling around with her boyfriend instead of a pregnant seventeen year old who was willfully using a man who loved her too much to say no. He was pretending that she loved him, and that this was the start of a relationship instead of a death warrant on any possibility they had for a real future together.

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><p>AN: Ah, pregnancy mood swings. Actually, I meant this to be the mood swings of a really confused, really scared teenager, but she is at the right time in the pregnancy for mood swings, so that probably didn't help.

Next chapter is the beginning of the second arc. Arc one isn't really over yet, so there is a bit of overlap between the two, but we're getting pretty deep into the story now :)


	14. Chapter 14

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

A/N: Oh my gosh, I almost forgot to post!

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><p>Payson's body was like clockwork. She woke every single night at three a.m. and rushed to the bathroom to be sick. Which meant that every single night at three a.m. Sasha got up and stayed in the bathroom with her, holding her hair if it was loose and rubbing soothing circles on her back until the nausea passed.<p>

The line between them was blurry before she moved in with him. After nearly two weeks of living together, the line was nonexistent. The level of intimacy he shared with her surpassed what he'd ever had with a girlfriend. He'd held her as she cried, laid together watching TV, carried her to bed when she fell asleep on his chest—hell, he'd even talked about sex with her. Oddly, though, he thought sitting with her while she threw up was probably the most intimate thing they'd experienced together. It was probably the most intimate thing he'd ever experienced with _anyone_, even surpassing having sex or saying 'I love you.' There was something about seeing someone that vulnerable, in what was quite possibly the most unattractive state that a human being could be in, that struck him as being so personal that it was inappropriate. She needed him, though, so he wasn't going to leave her alone just because he was uncomfortable with the level of intimacy in the situation.

Exhaustion hit her at the same time as the morning (or night) sickness, and they both hit her hard. It started the night after her last visit with Austin, when she'd come home with grass in her hair and the faint blush of a sunburn. He wasn't an idiot, he knew what they'd been doing—and outside, no less—and he couldn't help but wonder if it had been the trigger for the first real pregnancy symptoms she'd experienced. He didn't know if it was the physical exertion of the sex or the fever of the sunburn, but something had caused a change in her that night. She'd been sick every night since, and tired every day.

After that first day at the Rock, she'd come in early in the mornings just to spend time with her mum, and with Becca if she came in early, too. That stopped when the sickness started. Now she slept late, took a nap when she got home, and either went to bed early or fell asleep on the couch so that he had to carry her to bed. Waking up in the middle of the night didn't help, but she was more than just tired. She was completely drained of energy, barely even able to train. He'd taken to spotting her every time she was on an apparatus, afraid that she would be so tired that she fell. She had, too, which was probably the only reason that the other girls didn't resent all the time he spent spotting Payson. It had only happened twice, but it freaked them out. Payson never fell. Most of the time one of them could be seen on the other side of apparatus from him, spotting her in case she fell in a direction that Sasha couldn't reach.

She managed their morning rotation, but by the time they broke for individual skills she was drooping, and by the third time she practiced her piked Tkachev she looked like she was going to pass out. If this didn't get better soon she wasn't going to make it through the Olympics.

"Payson," he said, as she let her momentum fail and dropped from the bars. He cupped her neck and lifted her face so that he could see her eyes. They were slightly glazed. "You're going to hurt yourself. Go upstairs and lie down for a while. I'll wake you in an hour and if you don't feel better then, we're calling the doctor."

She nodded and the motion caused her to sway on her feet. If he hadn't been holding onto her she would have fallen. "Scratch that. You're going home right now. I'll get your mum to drive you." He walked with her to where her gym bag was stashed, his hand anchored to her shoulder in case she lost her balance. Cautioning her to sit down, he left her to put on her cover-ups and went to collect her mum.

Kim was elbow deep in paper work at her desk. They were leaving for London in less than a week, and with Summer gone Kim was managing all of the preparations by herself. The NGO was technically handling the arrangements, but each gym was responsible for ensuring that everything was in order for their own gymnasts, and the Rock was the only gym involved that had multiple athletes going. Well, he supposed Denver Elite did too, now that Austin was training there.

"Kim," he said, walking into the office, "I need you to drive Payson home, and I think you should call Dr. Lehmann, too. I'm really worried about her."

Her face paled as she looked up at him, and it struck him that Payson's skin had been that same color for a couple of days now. "She's worse?" she asked, already knowing what he was worried about. They had been discussing it the past few days as Payson's fatigue continued to grow.

He nodded grimly. "She is. She's barely able to stand on her own, and I'm afraid she's going to pass out. This can't be normal."

"It's not. It was at first, when she was just really tired, but getting worse like this is not normal. I'll call Dr. Lehmann from the car and we're going straight to his office." She gathered her belongings as she spoke and they headed down the stairs together. Payson hadn't moved from where he left her. She'd managed to pull a pair of shorts over her leo, but her jacket was lying on the floor beside her like she didn't have the energy to put it on. Lauren, Emily, and Kaylie were standing nearby keeping an eye on her but not invading her space.

"Come on, Pay, time to go." He took her hands and pulled her up, but quickly realized she wasn't going to be able to walk on her own. He frowned and then swept her up in his arms. When she was awake enough to realize that he carried her out of the gym, she was going to be furious, but he would cross that bridge when he came to it. He noted that the worry on Kim's face reflected his own and made a snap decision. "You know what? Forget the doctor's office. We're taking her to the hospital."

He instructed Jake to take over the gym and told the girls to start a conditioning circuit, Kim told Becca to wait at the gym until she called, and then they left with Payson. Kim sat in the back seat with her daughter and spoke on the phone with the doctor, who agreed with their decision to take her to the hospital and said that he would meet them there. Sasha was speeding. There was a clamminess to her skin that hadn't been there when he carried her to bed the night before; it made him nervous. When she passed out halfway to the hospital, he floored it.

He left the women parked in front of the emergency room entrance while he ran in for help. He mumbled incoherent excuses to the people in line as he pushed he way to the front and told the receptionist, "I need help outside. I've got a pregnant woman out in my car and she lost consciousness on the way here."

Emergency room service may not be perfect, but when you say pregnant and unconscious in the same sentence, they get on the ball. They got a stretcher out to the car and rolled her in through a side door, completely ignoring the normal admissions route. Sasha made to follow, but he was told in politest way possible to get the car the hell out of the ambulance lane.

The emergency room parking lot was full—figures—so he found the closest metered spot and pulled in. He didn't bother digging out money for the meter. He'd pay the damn ticket later. He jogged back to the entrance and made his way to a desk off to the side, where he'd been instructed to go for admission to the ward. "I'm here for Payson Keeler, she was just taken back a few minutes ago."

She turned to type something in the computer and asked, "What's your relationship to the patient?"

"I live with her." He ignored the nurse's slightly raised eyebrow. She was probably looking at Payson's age on the screen and making some assumptions about their relationship, but he didn't care. Roommate or significant other got him back there. Coach probably didn't.

"Well Mr…?"

"Belov."

"Mr. Belov, it looks like she's about to be moved to the Women's Ward, but if you hurry you can catch her." She printed a visitor badge and handed it to him, saying, "Go through these doors and to the right. She's in treatment room eleven."

The woman buzzed open the doors for him and he rushed to her room, which was actually just a curtained off cubicle. Kim was standing by watching as a technician drew blood from Payson's arm, but she turned when he said her name. He opened his arms for her and she dropped against him just like Payson always did. It was funny how the mother and daughter could be so different and yet so much alike. "What's happening? What did they say?"

"Not much," she said, stepping out of the embrace. There was the difference between them. Payson would have stayed. "They're going to run some blood tests. They think maybe it's severe anemia. She's awake now, but barely."

He wanted to go to her immediately, but he made himself stay with Kim and get some answers. "The woman out front said they were moving her. Why?"

Kim laughed half-heartedly. It came off rather pathetic. "That one I actually remember from my younger days. They put all pregnant women in the Women's Ward, regardless of what's wrong. The nurse said it was standard protocol."

He was going to ask more questions, about what the anemia meant for the pregnancy, but behind him a soft voice said, "Sasha?"

He forgot about his question and hurried to her side, taking the hand that she was trying to hold up for him. It was like dead weight against his palm. "Hey. You had me worried there for a little while."

"I passed out?" she asked, obviously not remembering what happened.

"You did. Scared the hell out of me. I broke a half dozen traffic laws trying to get you here." Her smile was weak, but so was his teasing. It was tough being lighthearted in an emergency room.

"The baby?"

"I…" He faltered, not wanting to say it. "I don't know. Dr. Lehmann's on his way, so we'll know soon."

Her hand twitched against his, like she was trying to squeeze it but couldn't quite manage. He raised her hand to his lips and kissed it, trying to give her the comfort and support she needed. He didn't say anything else. He just stood there holding her hand until a nurse came to take her to the ward.

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><p>AN: And so begins the second arc. This is where things go off book, because I absolutely had not planned this. It just sort of… happened.

I need reviews! Any guesses as to what's wrong? (Don't worry, she's not going to lose the baby)


	15. Chapter 15

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

A/N: This one's long. This is actually the other part of chapter 14. I split it in two because it was so flippin' long.

I researched this stuff like crazy. Everything that happens medically in this story is possible. Maybe not likely, but definitely possible ;)

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><p>They settled Payson in bed and waited for the arrival of either Dr. Lehmann or the blood test results, and Kim and Sasha took the time to make some important phone calls. Sasha sat with Payson while Kim called Mark and Becca, and then she came back to sit with her while Sasha called Austin. It wasn't a phone call he was anxious to make, but, then again, telling Mark that his daughter was in the hospital probably wasn't fun for Kim.<p>

He called the office at Denver Elite and Marty answered. Sasha was surprised. He figured that this close to the Olympics Marty would be out on the floor with Kelly and Austin, like Sasha always was with his four girls. He told himself that now was not the time to wonder about trivial things and said, "Marty, it's Sasha. I need to speak with Austin right away."

"Why?" Marty probed. "When you were here last weekend I got the distinct impression that you two didn't get along anymore."

He pinched the bridge of his nose, not in the mood to deal with Marty's crap. "I don't have time to play games. I need to talk to Austin _now_."

Despite all evidence to the contrary, Marty wasn't a fool. He didn't bother to argue. He put Sasha on hold, and when the line picked up again it was Austin. "Sasha? What's going on, is something wrong?"

Austin wasn't a fool, either. Sasha wouldn't call him for any reason other than a problem with Payson. "Payson's in the hospital. She passed out."

"What?" In a strange twist of life, the terror in Austin's voice actually made Sasha warm to him. It proved that he really did care about Payson and her well being. "Is she okay? Is the baby okay?"

He really hoped that Marty wasn't in the room with Austin to hear that. "She's awake now, just really tired and really weak. We're not sure about the baby yet."

"I'm coming up there."

He figured as much. "We're in the Women's Ward. It's probably easiest for you to come in through the main entrance instead of the emergency room, and I'm sure the information desk can tell you how to get here. I wasn't paying much attention to where they were taking us."

"I'll be there as soon as I can," Austin said, and then hung up the phone. Sasha wasn't kidding when he told Payson she'd scared the hell out of him, so he couldn't imagine the kind of fear that Austin was feeling right now. He had a lot more on the line than Sasha did.

When he made his way back to Payson's room, he had to pinch himself to make sure he was awake. There was Payson, looking just as tired as she'd been when he left, and Kim, sitting by the bed and holding her hand, and… Santa Claus. He was obviously losing his mind.

Payson happened to turn her head and caught sight of him standing in the doorway. Her response was the same as it had been in that ER cubicle, a soft exclamation of his name and a hand lifted toward him. And just as he had in that cubicle, he strode to her side and took hold of her hand, this time lifting it to his lips for a kiss. Across the bed, Kim ignored his probably-inappropriate greeting and said, "Sasha, this is Dr. Lehmann. He just arrived."

"A pleasure to meet you, doctor," he said, shaking the man's hand. Why had Payson never mentioned that her OB looked like Santa? "Although, these certainly aren't the best circumstances."

"They certainly are not," he agreed, nodding his Santa-head. "But they are, I think, reparable. You are the father, yes?"

He and Payson both blushed, and even more so because it was a perfectly reasonable assumption based on his greeting. Payson answered, "No. Sasha's my coach." Then she smiled up at him and added, "The second most important man in my life."

He sent her a questioning look and she said, "Dad's first."

Sasha chose not to comment on the fact that Austin fell below him on that list even though he was the father of her child and the man she was currently sleeping with. He was starting to understand why the kid hated him so much.

Dr. Lehmann watched their interplay with curiosity but did not comment on it. "Ah, I see. Well, Coach Sasha, as I was telling Payson, she is suffering from iron-deficiency anemia, although quite a severe case of it." He turned to address Payson directly again. "Your red blood cell count is very low, which is why you have been feeling so tired and dizzy. We will give you some new blood cells while you are here and you will take iron supplements to help your body make more of your own blood cells. You will feel much better soon."

"What about the Olympics?" Payson asked, and for the first time Sasha felt like Payson might willingly give up competing. She hadn't just scared him. She'd scared herself.

The doctor shifted on his feet, appearing uncomfortable with the question. "You must be very closely monitored. They are in a week, yes?" Payson nodded. "You will feel much better by then. With the transfusion you will feel much better by Monday. But you must be followed by a doctor, and your mother and Coach Sasha must monitor your symptoms. You may need another transfusion, and if you are weak then you must not compete."

Sasha spoke before Payson could voice her agreement, already knowing that she would comply. There was something else important in the Dr. Lehmann's answer. "Wait, did you say transfusion?"

"Yes," he answered, "She must have red blood cells transfused to replenish what is missing."

"We're going to need documentation of that, that it was medically necessary." The IOC doping control was going to be a bitch about this.

Payson turned her gaze toward him with a drawn face. He could tell when comprehension dawned on her. "I'm going to pop positive for blood doping, aren't I?"

"It won't be a problem," Kim said, squeezing her daughter's hand. "WADA gives a blanket exception for any infusion during a hospital admittance. We don't even have to file a TUE. We just have to submit the documentation and they'll waive that positive result, no hassle at all. I promise."

What Kim said was mostly true, but she knew as well as he did that there _would_ be a hassle. Nothing concerning possible doping was ever hassle-free, even though the World Anti-Doping Agency did support her in this situation. They couldn't stop her from competing, but there was guaranteed to be at least one person in the chain of required signatures who wanted to investigate the situation. Their only defense was well-documented proof.

Sasha wasn't comforted by Kim's reassurance, but Payson was. She either fully believed her mom or was just too tired to care.

Dr. Lehmann was shifting on his feet again; Sasha was suddenly struck with the image of Santa getting caught with his hand in the cookie jar. He looked uncomfortable and distinctively guilty. He said, "I feel that I must apologize. This should not have happened. I failed to take into account Payson's diet and athletic demands. Had I performed my duties more effectively, this predicament might have been avoided."

"You're not God, Dr. Lehmann," Kim said, with the perfect combination of sarcasm and kindness to convey that she thought he was being ridiculous for blaming himself and sweet for caring enough to admit it. "You couldn't have seen this coming. You said earlier that Payson's morning sickness precipitated this. There was no way you could have know that she would get so sick."

Sasha wasn't around when he said that, and he didn't understand the connection between throwing up and blood count levels, but it did make sense that her morning sickness would speed up any bad thing that could be happening to her body. She'd thrown up everything her stomach had to offer and more this week, so her body probably wasn't getting enough nutrients.

Dr. Lehmann asked them to leave so that he could examine Payson more fully and ensure that there was no harm to the baby. As the closed the door behind them, Kim motioned for Sasha to follow her down the hall to the alcove they'd made their calls in. "I talked to Dr. Lehmann in the hallway for a few minutes before he came in to see Payson, and this is a lot worse than he's making it seem. We're trying to down play it so that Pay doesn't get stressed out and make it worse."

He knew what the doctor was saying sounded too good to be true. He made it sound like a small inconvenience, but that was not the way it felt when Payson was unconscious. "How bad is it?"

"Blood transplants are not common in pregnant women," she explained, "I've never even heard of it. Usually they just give you iron pills and move on, but Payson is too sick for the iron pills to even have an effect right now. He said that normal blood is about forty percent red blood cells, and regular anemia would be about thirty five percent. Payson's is _twenty-two_."

Sasha felt like punching a wall. "How did this happen so fast? I thought anemia was supposed to be something that happened over a long time. She was fine a week ago."

Kim pressed her hand to her forehead and struggled not to cry. "I guess it was a perfect storm. The baby takes a lot of her iron, especially now when it's first developing, and the things that gymnasts eat aren't high in iron, so she wasn't getting enough to make up the difference. Then she started getting so sick so she was getting _no_ iron and her body stopped making blood cells, and she was putting so much stress on her body that her old ones were dying way faster than they were supposed to. I mean, who could have ever predicted that everything would come together to make _that_ happen?" she said, pointing back toward Payson's room.

"Shit," he uttered, leaning back against the wall. Some great job he did taking care of her. "What about the Olympics? Is it really safe for her to go? Because that sounds a little too good to be true."

"We'll have to wait and see. The transfusion should make her a lot better, so we'll just have to monitor her like he said. She might be fine in a few days, once they get her red blood count back up, but there is a possibility that she'll need another transfusion." She sat down on a low bench by the wall and dropped her head into her hands. "And then even if she can compete, that drug test is going to be a nightmare. They can't do anything, WADA protects her under these circumstances, but somebody is going to want to investigate this. The IOC never takes anything at face value."

He sat down beside her and laid his hand on her shoulder, trying to comfort her even though what he wanted was to be comforted himself. "We'll deal with it. We'll deal with all of it and get Payson safely through the Games. Then after that I'm not even going to let her _walk_ anymore."

"Then you better be the one giving the orders," she said with a half-hearted chuckle, "because she would never listen to me if I told her to stay in bed."

She sighed and leaned back against the wall so that the crown of her head was tilted against the wall behind them. "Not that I'm begrudging you this at all, but your name was the first thing she said when she woke up. I'm so glad that she has you in her life, but when did I stop being the first person she would ask for?"

He had no idea what to say, so he didn't say anything at all. He squeezed her shoulder and knew that she would understand his silence. His feelings were just as confused as hers. He hated the idea of displacing Kim in Payson's life, but he certainly couldn't feel guilty for being the one she called for. He was more touched than anything. It meant the world to him that Payson considered him so important in her life.

Dr. Lehmann came to retrieve them when he left Payson. When they walked back into her room, the first words out of her mouth were, "The baby is okay."

"Oh, sweetie, I'm so glad." Kim rushed to her daughter's side and hugged her, which Payson was barely strong enough to return. "Did Dr. Lehmann say anything else?"

"Only that I'm going to be here for a long time still. I guess it takes a while for them to get everything ready and then the transfusion will take seven or eight hours." It was a necessary process, but that didn't make it any less frustrating, and Payson's frustration was written clear on her face. "Is Daddy coming?"

"Yeah, he should be here pretty soon," Kim answered. He was driving up from Denver, where his job was located. He couldn't find anything closer, but the distance was certainly inconvenient in the case of an emergency, like today.

"Do you think he could bring me some clothes?" she asked, grimacing. "I'd be a lot more comfortable if I had underwear."

Sasha checked his laugh. He'd learned a long time ago that Payson had no censors, so he had to stop being embarrassed by the things she said and be amused by them instead. He'd completely forgot that she'd come to the hospital in a leo. He didn't even remember when she changed into the hospital gown she was currently wearing. It must have been while they were settling her into the bed, but he didn't recall ever having left the room during that transition. It was entirely possible that she'd changed clothes in front of him and he didn't even notice.

Kim didn't bother to hide her chuckle. "Sure, sweetie. I'll call him and ask for him to drop by the house on his way here."

She stepped out to call Payson's dad and Sasha moved to sit on the side of her bed. "Austin should be here soon," he told her. "Probably sooner than your dad because I'm sure he's speeding."

Payson managed a weak laugh. "You should call him again and let him know that the baby and I are okay. He's probably freaking out."

"He probably is," he agreed. "I'll go call him now. And I should call the Rock and let the girls know you're okay. They were pretty scared when we left."

Payson nodded. "Tell them I'm not allowed to have visitors while I'm getting the transfusion or something. Otherwise they'll want to come see me and they'll wonder why I'm in the pregnancy ward."

"Okay, I'll tell them. But do you want to see them later tonight when you can go home?"

"You want me to invite them to our apartment so they can all see that I'm living with you?" she teased, but the effect was ruined by her inability to keep her eyes open.

"No, cheeky," he said, squeezing her knee affectionately. "I thought they could come visit you at your parent's house."

"Sasha, I want to go _home_." The whine in her voice was unmistakable, but considering the day she'd had he didn't blame her. He was just glad Kim wasn't around to hear her refer to their apartment as home. Her day had been hard enough as it was, but hearing Payson call someplace else 'home' after only two weeks might break her heart.

"I know Payson, but I don't think that's an option tonight. We were all really scared, and your parents and Becca are going to need to be around you tonight to reassure them that you're okay." He wanted to take her home, too, but he knew her family needed to be close to her right now.

"Will you stay, too?" she asked.

He smiled at her, the first real smile he'd had all day. "Of course. Where you go, I go."

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><p>AN: I spent several hours today locked in a room with 200 other girls because UT Dallas went on a tornado lockdown. Not my best day ever. Make me feel better with reviews.


	16. Chapter 16

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

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><p>Emily was the one to keep them going after Sasha left with the Keelers. She knew that Payson would be pissed at them later if she found out that they all sat around biting their fingernails over her instead of training.<p>

Becca _was_ sitting around biting her fingernails, but that was a lot more understandable. She wasn't going to the Olympics in a week, so she didn't have that to distract her from the fact that her sister was in the hospital, and training for training's sake wasn't going to help her right now. She was sitting upstairs in the office with her phone clutched in her hand waiting for calls and texts from her mother. Emily was certain that she was getting news about Payson, but they had no right to press her to share.

Tara, who had been manning the phones for the last couple of hours, came downstairs and headed straight for them, hopefully with news. "Sasha just called, girls. He wanted me to tell you that Payson is okay."

They all breathed half a sigh of relief. The other half was waiting for more news. Kaylie asked, "Did he say what was wrong?"

"He did. She's very anemic and she's getting a blood transfusion. But the doctor said she should be back to gymnastics in a couple of days."

"Well, where is she?" Emily asked, anxious to see her friend. "Can we go see her?"

The assistant coach shook her head. "I'm sorry girls, but she can't have visitors during the transfusion. That won't be done until late this evening, but Sasha said that he didn't mind if you stayed up late tonight to visit her." Tara, always sweet, tried to make the promise sound as positive as possible. "They think she'll be home around eight or nine tonight."

"Thanks, Tara," Kaylie said, though a little more disappointed than thankful. "Did he say anything else?"

Tara offered them a small, encouraging smile. "Just not to worry and to keep working. I'm sure she's going to be fine, girls. Sasha wouldn't lie to you about this."

When Tara left, Emily started to say that they needed to get back to work on their floor routines, but Kaylie beat her to the punch. "Listen, Em, I know what you're going to say, and your right. The Olympics are only a week away and we can't slack off. But right now I won't be able to concentrate. A short break won't kill us."

Emily thought about it for a minute and decided that Kaylie was right. It wouldn't do them any good to practice when they were distracted; it would only increase their chance of injury. She nodded her acquiescence and the three girls moved off to sit on the mats—the same ones that Payson was sitting on earlier. Lauren grabbed her phone out of her bag and started typing like crazy.

"Do you think she's going to be able to compete?" Kaylie asked with trepidation. "She's been sick all week, and just… one week to recover? That doesn't seem like very much."

Emily debated whether to not to share what she knew. She decided that it was time. "It wasn't just this week."

"What?"

"It was all last week, too. She wasn't acting like herself." She'd kept a close eye on Payson since that first day she noticed the changes, and something was definitely wrong. "Sasha was being super overprotective of her, and she stopped training the Amanar, and she took really long breaks. A lot of them. She was always here before us in the mornings, but she wasn't working out, and she hasn't stayed late in ages, and she actually left _early_ last Monday and this one." Neither of the other girls had noticed the changes, and listing them together made it sound even worse.

Kaylie was staring at her, stunned, when Lauren finally spoke.

"Guys?" she squeaked. She was still staring at her phone, and she looked about as pale as Payson had. "I think Tara was wrong. Sasha might have been lying to us when he said that Payson would be okay."

"What do you mean?" Kaylie asked. "Did you find out something else?"

Lauren looked up at them, her eyes wide with fear. "No, I… I googled blood transfusions. It's all about injuries where you bleed really really bad, which we know didn't happen to Payson, and… and cancer."

"Payson doesn't have cancer, Lo. There's no way, she would have told us." Kaylie turned to Emily for support. "Right? We're her best friends. She would have told us."

Emily was getting a sinking feeling in her stomach. "I don't know. She was hiding _some_thing from us."

"Do you think that's why she was crying a couple of weeks ago?" Lauren asked, biting her lip. "Because she found out she was sick?"

"No, that was about Austin. Sasha said it was about Austin." Kaylie was forceful, like if she insisted hard enough nothing would be wrong with Payson.

Emily couldn't be that forceful. In fact, she could barely get the words out of her mouth. "No, he didn't. We asked if it was about Austin and he said 'in a way.' I never did understand why she slept with him in the first place. Maybe that's why, because she was already upset about something else."

"So what do we do?" asked Lauren. "Do we talk to her about it?"

That was one answer Emily could give without hesitation. "No. Obviously she doesn't want to talk about it, so we can't force her. We'll go over to see her tonight and ask if she's okay, and if she doesn't tell us what's going on we drop it. Pressing her with questions isn't going to help her."

"So that's it?" Kaylie asked, clearly uncomfortable with the plan. "We just forget that our friend is in the hospital and pretend like everything is normal?"

"We train, that's what we do. I don't know what's wrong with Payson, but I do know that she wants us to win gold, so we're going to. For her."

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><p>AN: Okay, I know this one was short, but the next chapter is really long, so that makes up for it, right?

I put in Lauren googling blood transfusions as a little bit of art reflecting life. When I realized that Payson was going to be sick, I had to figure out _why_ she was sick, so I googled blood transfusions and that was what turned up. I knew she didn't have cancer, so I had to do some much more in depth research (like reading research articles from scholarly journals) to figure out what was really wrong with her.

A little behind-the-scenes tidbit—originally when Sasha told Payson to go upstairs and lie down for an hour, she was _actually _supposed to do it. But then when I wrote it that's not what turned up on the page, so I had to redesign a few things to fit where the _story_ wanted to go instead of where _I_ wanted it to go. And by a few things I mean pretty much everything from here on out ;)

I haven't written a word for an entire week, so I need some nice inspiring reviews. More than once a single review has gotten me out of a writing slump, so you might be the one to do it this time :)


	17. Chapter 17

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

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><p>Austin probably broke a record getting from Denver to Boulder. He sped the entire way, and when Sasha called him back less than half an hour later, he was already pulling into the hospital parking lot. He was relieved that Payson and the baby were okay, but he couldn't fully believe it until he saw her for himself. If she made it through this he was going to kill her. She'd been telling him all week that she was 'just tired.'<p>

He wound his way up to where she was staying, thankful for the signs at every corner that directed him to where he needed to be. A woman had to buzz him into the ward, but he saw Sasha as soon as he stepped through the door. He was standing in the hallway talking to one of the nurses.

"Sasha!" he called, rushing to his side. He wasn't entirely comfortable with Sasha's role in Payson's life, but he was at least thankful that she had someone to look after her. He was serious when he asked Payson to move in with him, but it was probably a good thing that she said no. He couldn't take care of her the way she needed, the way that Sasha could. "What's happening? Where is she?"

Sasha thanked the nurse and then clapped his hand on Austin's shoulder. "Come on, I'll take you to her. They're getting ready to start the transfusion."

He was shocked when he saw her. She looked small and weak, and her movements were slow even as she turned to look at him. Her skin was pasty and there were deep purple circles underneath her eyes, like someone had punched her. Everything about her was a complete contrast to the lively, smiling girl who left his house on Monday.

"Christ, Pay, are you alright?" He moved to the side of the bed and leaned to kiss her, ignoring the raised eyebrow from her mother. Even her kiss seemed weak, like she was trying to press her lips against his but wasn't quite capable.

"I'm fine Austin," she said, trying to smile at him. "They said this should make me feel a lot better."

He looked up at the nurses and noticed that they were hanging a bag of blood from a hook on the IV stand and attaching it to her arm. He shuddered, creeped out by the idea of someone else's blood being pumped into her body. "So that's it? They give you a little bit of blood and you're better, just like that?"

"Not exactly," she said, looking sheepish. "It's not so much a little blood as a lot of blood. They have to do this four times. Some doctor came to talk to me—a hematologist, I think he said—and said that my blood cells were committing suicide, so I have to do this, and take a bunch of iron, and maybe get another transfusion if my cells keep dying. But this really will make me feel better, at least enough to get me through the Olympics."

Wow. That was…intense. "Is this normal? I mean, cells committing suicide? I've never even heard of that."

She shook her head slightly. "No, not really. I guess I'm just special," she joked. "My life was like a petri dish for something like this."

Kim jumped into the conversation at this point. "It took a lot of things combined together to make this happen, Austin. Some of it was gymnastics, some of it was just her body, and some of it was a fluke. It was a one in a million chance, and the doctor said it might have happened even if she wasn't pregnant."

"He could probably write a paper on me when this is all over with. I'll make him famous." He was surprised by her light-hearted attitude, especially considering how sick she looked. There was no way she was feeling as upbeat as she was trying to sound.

Sasha noticed his confusion. "She hasn't been like this very long. I think she's still riding on the high of finding out the baby's okay."

Payson weakly stuck her tongue out at her coach. "I have to joke," she said, "Or otherwise I'm going to start thinking about the fact that I'm being force-fed blood and start freaking out."

Austin couldn't help but see the logic in her statement. He was freaking out and he wasn't even the one getting the blood. She was handling the whole situation really well, much better than he would be in her place.

"Did, uh… Do you know if… Was there, like, a trigger that made this start or something?" He didn't know how to ask this in front of her mom and coach, but he couldn't help but wonder about the timing. She'd been fine when they spent the afternoon together on Monday.

Payson knew what he was asking. She rolled her eyes—or at least tried to. "You are such a guy. Last I checked having sex does not cause your cells to kill themselves. The timing was a coincidence."

He blushed and Kim looked shocked, but Sasha was unperturbed by her implicit confession. He knew the two of them were close, but close enough for her to tell him that she was having sex? Was she really that frank with him?

At that time someone came to the door and asked to speak with Sasha, leaving Austin, Kim, and Payson sitting in awkward silence. He was pretty sure that Kim had not known that he was sleeping with Payson. You know, outside of the obvious first time. Austin had never been so thankful to see Sasha as he was when the older man walked back into the room. If the three of them had been alone any longer, he was sure that Kim would have broke down and asked them about their relationship, and he didn't have a good answer for her.

Sasha had a broad smile on his face. He walked over to sit on the side of Payson's bed and held up a movie case from a nearby video rental. "I have a surprise for you," he said.

She didn't reach for it like Austin thought she would, and he realized with a jolt that it was because she couldn't lift her hand that high. Her eyes brightened, though, and she smiled wider than she'd been able to so far. "Stick It? How did you get that?"

"I bribed one of the nurses going off shift to pick it up for me." Something was going on between the two of them that Austin didn't understand. He'd seen this before, in the gym, when they seemed to communicate without words. He was pretty sure that they were saying more with one look than he could in an hour long conversation with her.

She reached forward and put her hand on his knee, the closest to a hug that she would be able to manage for a while. "Thanks, Sasha. Now I'll have entertainment for two of the eight hours I'm stuck here."

"If I know you, you'll have entertainment for four hours, because you'll watch it twice." Austin didn't understand their teasing, and he didn't know what the big deal was about this movie, but one thing came through loud and clear: Sasha understood Payson in a way that he never would. It didn't matter that she was sleeping with him. It didn't matter that they would be linked together for the rest of their lives through their child. It would always be Sasha.

Sasha started the movie—who knew that hospitals had DVD players?—and Austin shook himself out of his thoughts. If Payson and Sasha together was inevitable, he was going to enjoy whatever time he had left with her. He felt out of the loop and there was at least one thing he could reasonably ask her about to get back in it. "Eight hours?"

Kim answered, because Payson wasn't even paying attention to him. "The doctor said that it would take about two hours for each bag. She has to have four bags, so we're going to be here for a long time. We appreciate you being here, but don't feel obligated to stay the whole time if you don't want to. It's going to be long and boring."

"No, I want to be here," he protested, but then he was distracted by what was going on between Sasha and Payson. She was stretching her hand toward him, without lifting it off the bed, as he walked toward her. He took hold of it and she gave a barely perceptible tug toward her, indicating that she wanted him to sit beside her on the bed. As soon as he was sitting she leaned her body against him and he wrapped his arm around her shoulders so that they were curled together. Austin felt certain that if her right arm hadn't been attached to a bag of blood, she would have wrapped both her arms around his waist.

Kim was completely unfazed by their intimate position. Was she okay with the connection they had or did she just not notice it? Was this normal behavior for them? In the gym they were always together, always paying attention to one another, but there was never this level of intimacy between them. Austin thought the way Sasha touched Payson in the gym, too comfortable and almost caressing her skin, was inappropriate, but this was taking it to a whole new level.

A nurse came in to check on Payson and looked indulgently at the embracing couple on the bed. Austin couldn't read minds, but he could read her face pretty well. She thought Sasha was the baby's father, and she thought they made a good couple. God, he hoped his son looked like him, because if he had Payson's coloring everybody would assume he was Sasha's child. Austin wanted people to know that he was the father. He needed to talk to Payson and find out if she planned to name the baby Keeler or Tucker. He hoped it was Tucker.

Not long into the movie, Payson fell asleep against Sasha. Considering how bad she looked when he first came in the room, he was surprised she'd stayed awake for so long. She didn't even wake when her dad arrived. When the nurse came in to change the bag well over an hour later, Payson woke to get her vitals taken and then dropped her head right back down on Sasha's chest, not noticing anything else in the room. She slept straight through until it was time for the third bag to be placed, and that time she stayed awake after the nurse checked her over.

"How long have I been asleep?" she asked, blinking to clear her eyes.

Austin smiled as he watched her. He'd seen her naked and he'd seen her face contorted in pleasure, but he had never seen her sleepy like this. There was something vaguely disturbing about that fact, but he chose to ignore it. "Almost four hours. You're halfway done now. How do you feel?"

She paused to consider for a moment and then answered, "Better. The world's not spinning. I don't feel like my body's full of lead anymore. Definitely better." She glanced around the room and finally noticed Mark sitting in a chair on the other side of Sasha. "Daddy. You're here."

"I'm here," he said, his eyes twinkling in a way that Payson's often did. "I would have said hi, but you were pretty occupied when I got here."

"You should have woken me," she insisted.

Sasha climbed off the bed so that Mark could scoot closer to his daughter. Payson whimpered softly at the loss, but brightened again when her dad sat next to her. "You needed the sleep, sweetheart. I'm so glad that you're feeling better." There was a long pause before he said, "I'm sorry, Pay. I was wrong."

"No you weren't."

Austin could make assumptions about what they were talking about—probably him throwing her out of the house—but he would never know for sure, because the nurse chose that time to kick them out of the room. "Alright, gentlemen, I know you've been waiting a long time to talk to her, but she's been in that bed for even longer, so we need to get her up. If you'll step out for a few minutes I'll help her to the bathroom and let her get changed. You can come back in as soon as she's done."

The three men left the room and stood in an uncomfortable silence in the hallway. Austin wasn't sure what Mark's feelings were toward Sasha, but he knew exactly what they were toward _him_. In the three plus hours that they'd spent together, Mark made it abundantly clear that he hated Austin. Nothing he could do would ever make up for the sin of getting Mark Keeler's daughter pregnant. Considering the death glares he'd been getting, Austin was lucky to even be alive.

When they came back into the room, Payson was sitting on top of the blankets and wearing regular clothes. She stretched her hand out—she was actually able to lift it now—and no matter how much Austin or Mark would each have liked to believe she was reaching for him, there was no mistaking that she wanted Sasha. She scooted over so that Sasha could sit next to her, and Austin and Mark settled in their former places on either side of her bed.

Austin tilted his head to evaluate her appearance. She looked much healthier already. Her skin was starting to show some color and her eyes were clear. He was a little confused about her clothes, though. "How did you manage to get your shirt over your head with that thing attached?"

She rolled her eyes, successfully this time, and said, "The nurse unhooked the IV while I changed and then re-hooked it when I was done. This is _so_ much more comfortable." She did sound relieved to be in real clothes again. Then she glanced up at Sasha and asked, "Can we start the movie again?"

Sasha chucked. "I thought you would say that." He nodded to Kim and she got up to press play on the DVD player suspended above her head. When the movie started, all real conversation was impossible, so the room was filled with the sounds of the TV and Payson's occasional comments, mostly directed to Sasha.

The whole room breathed a sigh of relief when the last bag was started. They had been there for over six hours while she got the transfusion, and Payson, Sasha, and Kim had been there for a couple of hours before that. They were all ready to go home, Payson most of all. The blood was making her feel better, but there was no way that she could be comfortable sitting in one place for so many hours with a needle stuck in her arm.

They chatted during the last couple of hours, the atmosphere considerably lighter now that Payson was doing better, and Payson dozed off and on. Somehow she managed to successfully avoid any topic that would be uncomfortable; her relationship with Austin, her current living situation, and her fight with her dad, just to name a few. She was a master at steering a conversation in the direction she wanted, and Austin couldn't help but marvel. There was so much more to this girl than people knew.

When they finally left, Austin wanted to go with her to her parents' house, where she would be staying the night, but Payson said no. "The girls are coming to see me, and you can't be there when they come. How am I supposed to explain why you're there when they think we're not even speaking?"

Austin couldn't argue with her, not because of her reasoning, which was sound, but because he was never able to say no to her. When she wanted something, he had to comply, even if it frustrated him like this did or hurt him like their sexual relationship did. He was whipped and had no compunctions about it.

He kissed her goodbye in the hospital lobby, ignoring her dad's disapproving glare, and left. His mind was full on the drive home with a jumble of emotions. He was worried about Payson and the baby, was feeling surprisingly resigned about Payson and Sasha, and couldn't quite shake the feeling that he should know more about the woman he loved. Sasha knew everything about her; Austin didn't even know what her favorite movie was until today, and he only knew now because Sasha told him. There was something wrong with that. He was only certain about one thing: he wasn't going to get any sleep tonight.

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><p>AN: I don't have much to say today. I'm too tired. It's been a rough week.


	18. Chapter 18

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

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><p>Sasha texted them at around eight thirty to let them know that Payson was on her way home, and they beat her to her house. Sasha pulled into the driveway, driving Kim's car, and Mark parked his car against the curb. The girls got out and greeted Kim and Mark, asking for news about Payson as they walked up to the house.<p>

"She's fine," Kim promised. "She looks like her old self now. Come see for yourself."

Sasha was opening the passenger side of Kim's SUV, where Payson was sitting. He helped to steady her as she stepped out and then lifted her off her feet and into his arms.

"Sasha, this is completely unnecessary," she said, using her normal droll tone of voice. It was good to hear her sounding like herself again. Her voice had grown progressively wearier as the week progressed until this morning, when it seemed like speaking was too much of an effort for her to make.

"What, and let you fall and crack your head on the sidewalk a week before the Olympics? What kind of coach would I be?" He winked in their direction, which drew Payson's notice toward them.

She smiled broadly at them and said, "Ignore him. I can walk fine, he's just being overprotective."

Kim unlocked the door and they all filed inside. "You scared the shit out of me," Sasha said as he turned to carry her through the door, "So I reserve the right to be overprotective of you for _at least_ another two days."

She looked over his shoulder at them and rolled her eyes. He sat her down on the couch and they all converged on her, each bending to give her a hug and them settling down in seats around her. Payson made a joke. "You know, you're lucky to get those hugs. Earlier I couldn't even lift my arms, so hugs are a luxury today."

"Oh my God," Emily said, her pitch rising with each word. "You couldn't lift your arms? Pay, that's… scary as hell. What on earth happened?" She'd been the one insisting that they not push Payson, and yet here she was, pushing Payson. She couldn't help it, not when her friend said such horrifying things with such candor.

Lauren whispered in her ear, "Way to play it cool, Kmetko."

Payson grimaced, but she answered them anyway. "Sasha told you I had a blood transfusion, right?" They all nodded and she continued, "Well, I guess I wasn't getting enough iron and my body just reacted really weird. My blood cells started killing themselves, and the more of them died the weaker I got. But then as soon as they gave me more blood I started feeling better. I feel fine right now."

Payson was acting like it was all nothing, but obviously it wasn't. Not being able to lift your arms was not nothing. Your blood cells killing themselves was not nothing. Needing someone else's blood to be able to stand was not nothing. It was a whole lot of something. Emily just didn't know what that something was.

"Okay, so you're fine right now," Kaylie said, "but are you going to stay fine? Won't your blood just start dying again?"

Payson bit her lip, a sure sign that she didn't want to answer the question. "They're not going to _keep_ dying, not in the long run. We're not so sure about right now, though. The doctor wants me to keep getting tested for a few weeks, until my iron levels out, to make sure I don't get like this again, and I might need more transfusions. My mom has to talk to the IOC to make sure they have blood on hand for me in London." She rolled her eyes and tried to put a joking spin on the last statement, but nobody was biting. Needing to have blood on standby was not funny in any way, shape, or form.

"Are you sure you can compete, Pay? This stuff sounds really scary. Are the Olympics really going to be safe for you?"

Payson nudged her shoulder against Laurens and laughed. "You don't have to pretend, Lo. It's okay to say that you're afraid I'll beat you on beam."

They actually did laugh that time, and Lauren slipped her arms around Payson's waist. "I don't even care if you beat me, as long as you're well. I've been so scared, Payson."

"I'm fine, Lo, I promise." She wrapped her arms around Lauren and Kaylie on either side of her, and the two girls reached to where Emily was sitting on the coffee table and took her hands. It reminded Emily of that night at gymnastics camp, when they all sat holding hands around the fire, for a short time one perfect team. The perfection never lasted, but the bond never fully broke either.

Payson was the one who finally broke the moment, saying, "So… I'm going to fail my drug test."

They all pulled back and looked at her, Lauren and Kaylie's faces reflecting the shock that was surely on Emily's as well. Then, at the same time, they all started laughing. It took a minute for it to sink in, but they all knew the standard drug tests well enough to know why Payson would fail. The test for blood doping involved checking to see if any blood cells came from a different person, and Payson obviously had a _lot_ of blood cells from someone else now.

Emily wiped her eyes, watery from laughing so hard, and asked, "So what's going to happen? Are you filing a TUE?" The only way to get around a positive result on a drug test was to file for a therapeutic use exemption. To get a TUE, a doctor has to prove the banned substance, in this case blood, was medically necessary and couldn't be substituted with something else. It was a long, drawn out process that was rejected more often than not.

"I don't have to," she answered, disentangling herself from the other girls. "They make an exception if you're in the hospital. But I have to file one in case I need any more before I compete. Mom thinks she can pull some strings to get it through quick, so we don't have to worry about a retroactive decision that could screw up the team medal. You know how much the IOC hates doping scandals, so they will probably work with us to get it sorted before competition starts."

Lauren snorted. "I can't believe you're going to fail a drug test. I mean, I know you're not _really_ failing it, but still… just the idea that you're going to have a positive result, it's so ridiculous."

Lauren and Kaylie, sitting beside Payson, couldn't see her expression, but Emily could. She was sitting directly in front of Payson, so she had a clear view of the look that flickered across her face. It had a lot of emotions rolled up together, most of which Emily couldn't decipher, but there was one that was pretty obvious: guilt. Apparently there was something going on other than, or maybe on top of, Payson being sick.

Kaylie, not realizing that Lauren's words had an effect on Payson, soldiered on. "So why were you at the hospital for so long if all you needed was to get some blood?"

Payson sank back against the couch and covered her face. "Oh my God, it took _forever_. I had no idea how long blood transfusions take. I spent _eight_ hours with a stupid plastic tube sticking out of my arm."

"It takes eight hours to do a blood transfusion? That's… a lot." Emily and Kaylie both giggled at Lauren's baffled expression.

"I don't think it always takes that long," Payson said, shaking her head. "I just got a lot of blood, so it took longer to do. I am really glad to be out though. I hope I never have to do that again."

"Girls." They all turned to see Sasha leaning against the entrance to the living room, watching them. "I know you want to talk, but Payson needs to sleep. And so do you three. You have practice in the morning."

Kaylie glanced back to Payson. "Aren't you coming tomorrow?"

She just shook her head. "I'll be back on Monday."

They all hugged her goodbye and left, promising to come see her again after practice the next day. For some reason that Emily couldn't fathom, Payson looked a little unhappy about that. Payson was all about the team, so she loved when they had to opportunity to just hang out together. It was strange to see her reluctant to spend time with them.

They all piled into the Tanner hummer and left, but Lauren didn't drive very far before she pulled over and put the car in park. She angled herself to face Kaylie and Emily and asked, "So, what do you think?"

"She's hiding something," the two girls said simultaneously.

Lauren nodded. "I thought so too. I just don't know _what_."

"Same here," Emily said, "She's definitely sicker than she's saying, but then I feel like there's something else, too. There are just things that don't fit. Like why did she change her beam routine, and did you guys notice that she didn't want us to come back tomorrow?"

"Yeah, I caught that. And I don't understand it at all. Why wouldn't she want to see us?" There was a note of hurt in Kaylie's voice along with her worry.

Emily mulled it over and came to a decision. "I don't know what going on, but I think… I think we have to trust her. She'll tell us when she's ready."

Neither looked happy about it, but Lauren and Kaylie agreed. "Trust her," Kaylie said, tasting the words. "Okay, I can do that. But if she gets worse, we're talking to her and we're getting some answers."

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><p>AN: Okay, one of the most frequent things I hear in feedback is that ya'll love the consistent posting schedule for this fic…which is why I feel so bad about this. I'm going on hiatus for a week. I'm having some health problems that I need to deal with, so I won't be on here for a while, but I promise I'll post a new chapter next Monday. I'll even set an alarm in my phone so I don't forget :)

Thoughts on the new season so far? Love it, hate it? I personally love it. Not as good as the Sasha/Payson stuff was, but awesome nonetheless :)


	19. Chapter 19

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

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><p>"What's going on with her, Kim?" They were closed up in their bedroom, where they could have a modicum of privacy while they discussed their daughter. "She won't even let me talk to her about coming home, and Austin is all of a sudden involved in this? I thought she hated him."<p>

Kim took his hand and pulled him down on the bed beside her. "I don't know, Mark. I don't know. She said she was trying to work things out with Austin, but I don't know when it got to this point." Mark wasn't there when Payson let it slip that they were sleeping together, so he didn't know the full extent of the relationship, but it spoke volumes that Austin was at the hospital with them. When Austin kissed Payson goodbye, Mark was glaring daggers at him.

"What about coming home? She won't even let me broach the subject, and I don't understand why. I thought she would be happy to finally get off Sasha's couch."

Kim responded offhand, not stopping to consider her words. "She's sleeping in the bed." She caught Mark's horrified look a second after the words left her mouth, and quickly elaborated, "_Sasha_'s sleeping on the couch. He gave her the bed. Mark, she's having a baby with someone else. Don't you think it's time to get over this thing with Sasha?"

"No I don't," he answered, frowning. "You may not see how inappropriate things are between them, but I do. Even if we completely ignore the fact that she is staying in his apartment, she slept _on top_ of him for hours today. She might be having a baby with Austin, but Sasha was the one she kept reaching for."

"Sasha is a good friend to all of us, Mark, and you should be thankful that Payson has him in her life. What do you think would have happened to her if he hadn't taken her in?" It was a low blow and she regretted it immediately. When Mark asked Payson to leave, he was only doing what he thought was best for her.

He stood up and started pacing the room again. "Do you want to hear me say that I was wrong? Fine, I was wrong, I shouldn't have made her leave. But I'm trying to fix that now, and I don't know how to do that when she won't even talk to me."

"She is talking to you, Mark. She doesn't resent you for asking her to leave, she hasn't been anything but happy to see you. Maybe she doesn't want to talk about coming home because she's afraid of what you'll say." Honestly, she didn't have a clue why Payson kept avoiding the topic, but that seemed like a likely explanation.

"I don't know what to do," he said, covering his face with both hands. "When you called me today it felt like Boston all over again. I don't want to lose her."

She stood up and walked over to where he was standing, wrapping her arms around his waist. "You're not going to lose her. She'll be fine. And seven months from now, when you're holding your grandchild, you'll forget all about how hard this was."

Mark dropped a kiss on top of her head and asked, "How did we even get here? Wasn't Payson supposed to be the good child?"

"You know, statistically, girls born to teenage mothers are more likely to be teenage mothers themselves. So, really, this is all our fault." Her joke worked; Mark smiled. "Let's just go to bed. It's been a long day and I'm tired. We could talk about this all night long and not come up with any answers, but maybe if we go to sleep things will be a little clearer in the morning."

She was asleep as soon as her head hit the pillow, but she didn't stay that way for long. Over the course of nearly eighteen years, she had conditioned herself to wake at the sound of one of her daughters being sick. She looked at the clock: 3:08

She got up to check on Payson, and her movement woke Mark. He followed her into the hallway, but they both stopped short of the bathroom. The door was wide open and Payson was indeed curled on the floor being violently sick. What surprised Kim was that Sasha was curled on the floor right behind her. She was cradled between his legs, hanging onto his bent knee for support as her body convulsed. With one hand he was holding her hair back from her face, and with the other he was rubbing circles on her back. Kim could remember Mark doing something similar for her when she was pregnant.

When her retching abated, Payson leaned back against Sasha's chest and Kim could see the tears streaming down her face. Sasha pulled an elastic from her wrist and wound it around her hair to keep it out of her face, all the while murmuring in Payson's ear. Kim couldn't hear what Sasha said, but she could hear Payson's response. "I'm tired of being sick, and I'm scared, and I want to go home but I can't because the girls want to come visit me again."

"I know," he said, "But you just have to get through one more day. I'll take you home as soon as they're gone, I promise."

Payson started throwing up again and Kim felt like joining her. She wanted to go home. She wanted to leave here and go home. This wasn't home for her anymore. Kim grabbed Mark's hand and pulled him back to their bedroom. The door was barely closed when she broke down. "Oh my God! That's why, that's why she didn't want to talk to you about coming home. Because she doesn't want to come back. Oh my God. I think I'm going to be sick."

He settled his hands on her shoulders, grounding her. "Kim, calm down. This isn't a bad thing. It just means she's growing up."

She shoved him away, not wanting to hear what he was saying. "This isn't a bad thing? How can you say that? Our daughter doesn't think this is home anymore. Do you get that, Mark, really? We're not home for her anymore."

"That's part of growing up, Kim. Part of becoming an adult is finding a place that's home for you, outside of what home is for your parents. Our first apartment was home for you, wasn't it?" It was, but it took a hell of a lot longer than two weeks for her to feel that way about it. It took months. "Look, I'm not happy about the fact that it's Sasha's apartment, but it's a good thing that she's attached to someplace else now. It means that she's ready to be on her own, and she has to be able to do that to raise a baby."

"I'm losing her, Mark," she said with a sob. "When she woke up at the hospital today, when we were still in the emergency room, she asked for Sasha. I was there with her, I'd been the one holding her when she passed out, but she asked for him. And now he's the one in there taking care of her instead of me, and he's the one she wants to go home with. I'm not that person for her anymore."

He pulled her to sit on the bed, just like she'd done for him earlier in the evening, and wrapped his arm around her. "It's natural, Kim. Believe me, I'd rather it been any other person in the world than Sasha Belov, but considering their living situation, it's natural that he's that person for her. You're her mom, you've always taken care of her, and that's a strong bond. But from what you've told me about the way things are for her now, they take care of _each other_. Isn't that right?"

She nodded her head against his chest and he continued, "It's not one way anymore, and that makes a huge difference. If she's taking care of him, too, then it's an equal relationship, and the relationship between a parent and a child could never be equal. It will always be you giving and her taking, and that's the way it's supposed to be with parents, but she can't live her whole life like that. She needs that reciprocal relationship, and Sasha's that person for her right now."

"I can't believe you're okay with this, Mark," she said, sniffling into his shirt. Mark's voice always had a calming effect on her, but she couldn't stop crying yet. "You're the one who said that Sasha and Payson's relationship was inappropriate, but now you _want_ them to live together? Because that didn't sound like something temporary until she turns eighteen. It sounds to me like something long-term. When I agreed to her staying with him, it never occurred to me that they might make it permanent. I don't even agree with you about their relationship and I'm not okay with that."

"What I want is for Payson to be able to take care of her child. I want her to be an adult and start taking responsibility so that she can be a good mother. And if Sasha Belov is the person who can help her do that then I will… try my hardest to accept it." Of everything he'd just said, it was his begrudging attitude that actually made her feel better. Mark still didn't like Sasha. At least something in this world was still normal.

She wiped her eyes with the back of her hand and asked, "How do I deal with this? Do I just let her go, or try to convince her to stay? Should I even try to talk to her about it? What if she's afraid to tell us that she wants to go with him, should I just let her go without questioning it?"

"You need to talk to her," he said, leaning down to place a kiss on top of her head. "I know it's hard for you, and I'm sure it's hard for her, too, but you can't just pretend like this isn't happening. She needs to hear you say that it's okay for her to leave."

"I don't know if I can say that, Mark. I'll talk to her, but I don't know if I can give her my blessing to leave for good."

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><p>AN: I'm back :) The chapters might not come every two days for a while yet, because I'm still at a point where I need to come home from work and crash every once in a while, but I promise no more than a one day delay in posting unless I let you know otherwise. I'm not going to leave you guys hanging :)

Best part of tonight's episode: the subtle reference to Jake. I'm shipping Lauren/Jake so hard this season. I don't know if the show is going there, but I really hope they do. One of these days when I'm feeling better I'm going to write a one shot for them. Also one of these days when I'm feeling better I'm going to finish the next chapter of MKB. This stupid health problem hasn't hit me so hard in nearly three years, and it's put a serious cramp in my writing :(


	20. Chapter 20

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

A/N: Note to self-post first, then sleep.

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><p>She'd been avoiding it all day. She knew she had to talk to Payson, but she'd put it off over and over again. She didn't know what she was going to say. Lying in bed last night, she decided that she couldn't support Payson's decision to stay with Sasha, no matter what Mark said. Then she woke up and came into the living room to find them sitting on the couch together with Payson curled into the crook of his arm, which was slung across her shoulders, and her resolve weakened. She could see the protective glint in Sasha's eyes as he looked down on her, and the joy on Payson's face as they spoke softly was unmistakable. It was one thing to see them in such an intimate position while Payson was sick and looking for comfort, but it was completely different to see them like that in a normal environment. Payson wasn't seeking comfort or reassurance this time, she was just doing what was obviously normal to her.<p>

So instead of talking to her daughter, Kim spent the morning on the phone with Marcus McGowan of the NGO and Emilie Morel with the IOC, trying to work out the details of Payson's drug test waiver and TUE. Speaking with Marcus gave Kim new appreciation for Sasha and made her more sympathetic to the possibility to Payson staying with him. Since the day they found out Payson was pregnant, Sasha's number one priority had been to protect Payson's interests, be it going to the Olympics, keeping the baby, or both. He was the coach of the Women's National Team and he could have insisted that she keep her normal training schedule, but he never did. Marcus was a completely different story. When she told him that Payson had just received an emergency blood transfusion, the first thing he said was, "Can she still compete?" Quickly following was, "Will she be at her usual level?" He wasn't evil like Ellen Beals, but the fact still remained that they called back and forth for four hours that morning and he never once asked how Payson was doing.

The process seemed to be going well, just as Kim expected. She was certain that there would be snags, but both parties had a vested interest in Payson being able to compete. The NGO wanted the medals that Payson could potentially, and probably would, win. The IOC wanted the publicity. Payson was an international star, and she was a big draw for this Olympic cycle. With her fierce talent, moving story, gorgeous looks, and the sparking personality that Sasha had somehow drawn out of her, the whole world was interested in her. People who would never have watched the gymnastics competition under normal circumstances would be tuning in this year just to see Payson. Millions were on the line for IOC.

Eventually, though, she ran out of phone calls to make. She had to talk to Payson. Becca would be home from Avery's soon, and the other elite girls would be following close behind, and then her time would be up. Sasha had promised Payson that they would leave together as soon as her friends were gone. If they didn't talk now, she wasn't going to get a chance.

She walked into the living room, where Payson was curled under a blanket reading _Little Women_, and sat down beside her. She was nervous as hell about the coming conversation, but Payson was either unaware of what they were about to discuss or just wasn't concerned.

"Hey, mom," she said, closing her book and putting it down beside her. "How is everything going with the IOC?"

"Pretty well. You're fine on the transfusion from yesterday. I already faxed the documentation over to Emilie Morel and she's submitting an exception notice into the computer. She agreed to push the TUE application through to the committee on Monday, too, and she's going to press for a quick decision."

Payson bit her lip and looked up from under her eyelashes. "Does this mean that they're going to know that I'm pregnant? They have to have my medical records, right?"

"No," Kim said, shaking her head, "They only need the records that pertain to the transfusions, so the doctor blacked out everything else, including the fact that you're pregnant. And Dr. Owen, the blood doctor you saw in the hospital, is the one submitting the report instead of Dr. Lehmann so it's not coming from an obstetrician. They won't know anything except that you have iron-deficit anemia and eryptosis. Dr. Owen said that the doctors on the committee would probably pass it through just because they would be too ashamed to admit that they didn't know what eryptosis was."

Payson laughed weakly at her joke, not because she was too weak to laugh like yesterday, but because she just didn't find it that funny. "What's my schedule like now, as far as the doctors go?"

"Pretty busy," she answered, grimacing. Payson was going to hate this. "You've got an appointment with Dr. Lehmann and Dr. Owen on Wednesday morning before you leave, and then Dr. Owen recommended a doctor for you to see while you're in London. He'll do blood work on you on every non-competition day and give you a transfusion if you need one, and then you have ultrasounds scheduled for the 28th, the 3rd, and the 7th."

She expected Payson to complain about having so many appointments, but she didn't. In fact, she nodded her head and said, "Good. Maybe if we keep on top of this we'll be able control it. It can't possibly be good for the baby for me to be this sick."

Kim was impressed with how mature her daughter was being about the whole situation, but thinking about Payson's maturity just brought her back around to the subject she'd been avoiding. She took a deep breath and steeled herself, then said, "Pay, I think we need to talk."

"Okay, what do you want to talk about first, Austin or where I'm going to live?" Whatever Kim was expecting, it certainly wasn't that. She mostly thought that Payson would avoid the discussion like her. Apparently the phrase 'like mother like daughter' wasn't so accurate.

In the commotion of last night, Kim had forgotten about the problem with Austin. They did need to talk about it, but it could wait for a little while. "Let's talk about where you're going to live first. You know that you're welcome to come back home, right?"

"I know, and I'm sorry, mom," she said. "I know that's what you want, but it's not what _I_ want. Dad was right, I can't raise a child if you're still taking care of me. I need to do what's best for Alex, and right now that's staying with Sasha. We're comfortable together. We work well together."

Kim was spared the trouble of coming up with a response, because she had a question to ask instead. "Alex?"

Payson's smile was shy and beautiful, full of all the motherly pride that you often see in pregnant women. "Yeah, that's his name. Or Aly if it's a girl, but I'm pretty sure it's Alex."

"Wow. I didn't realize that you had a name picked out already." Somehow that hit her hard. It was one thing to talk about 'the baby,' but it was entirely different to talk about 'Alex,' like he was already there. It was just one more check on the list of overwhelming things that kept making it sink in a little more that her daughter was going to be a mother.

"Yeah," Payson said, her smile widening, "It's either Alexandru Mark Tucker or Alexandra Ava Tucker, as long as Austin is okay with me using his sister's name."

"Alexandru," she said, her tongue slipping on the strange pronunciation. It was a good thing she was going to call him Alex. "So you're naming him after Sasha."

She nodded her head, not offering any further explanation. She probably didn't think she needed an explanation, and maybe she didn't. Maybe, considering their relationship, it was perfectly natural for her to name her child after Sasha. She said in the hospital that Sasha was the second most important man in her life, but Kim wasn't sure if that was true. Sasha was either ahead of Mark now, or would be very soon.

"Sweetie, I know how much you care about Sasha, and how much he cares about you, but are you sure this is a good idea?" She wasn't just talking about naming the baby after him. She was talking about the whole situation, with them living together and her depending on him so much. "This has gone past your friend or your coach helping you out during a tough time. Sasha's playing the role of a husband now, and that's a pretty big responsibility to put on someone who you aren't romantically involved with. Are you sure you aren't going to regret tying yourself so close to him? What happens when you meet somebody you want to marry? Or when Sasha does?"

"Nothing changes. This isn't permanent, Mom. We aren't planning to live with each other for the rest of our lives. We haven't even talked about what's going to happen when I turn eighteen yet. The plan was always for me to move out as soon as I was old enough to sign a lease somewhere."

Kim couldn't tell if Payson honestly thought that she would be moving out in a month or if she was just saying that to appease her. If she gauged the situation right, the only place either of them would be going when Payson turned eighteen was to a bigger apartment. The arrangement might not be permanent, but it was permanent enough. Instead of arguing the point further, which would get them nowhere, Kim just asked, "Are you sure this is what you want?"

Payson answered without hesitation. "Yes. We're good for each other."

"Okay," she said, even though it killed her to let her daughter go. "But we're not done discussing this. We're going to talk about this again when you decide what you're doing after your birthday."

Payson agreed and Kim moved on to the next difficult subject. "Now we need to talk about Austin. What's going on between you two?"

Payson snorted. "I'm pretty sure you caught on in the hospital," she said, and her attitude was a little too flippant for Kim's taste. "We're sleeping together."

"So after everything that's happened, you can just put that behind you and start a relationship?" Kim asked with narrowed eyes. That all sounded a little too easy to her, especially considering how things started between them. A one night stand was not a good foundation for a relationship, especially not one that had been so traumatizing.

After the past couple of weeks she should stop being surprised by things, but Payson still managed to shock the hell out of her when she said, "I didn't say we were in a relationship."

She didn't know what to say. What did that mean? That they were having casual sex? That didn't sound like something Payson would do. She wasn't casual about _anything_. But Payson had done a lot of things lately that were out of character for her, so Kim didn't know how to judge anymore. "I'm sure you don't want to tell me this," she said, "and I don't really want to hear it, but you're going to have to explain that. What _exactly_ is going on between you?"

"Pretty much just what I said. We're sleeping together. That's it. We get along and he's going to be involved in Alex's life, but I'm not interested in a relationship with him. It can't happen. I'll never be able to move past that first night."

"Did he talk you into this?" she asked, almost afraid of the answer.

She rolled her eyes and Kim felt like shaking her for not taking this more seriously. "I talked him into it. Or more like guilted him into it. I'm pretty sure he thinks he's in love with me, so he'll do just about anything I ask."

"Payson!" she cried, shocked at her daughter's behavior. "I'm ashamed of you. I taught you better than this. Sex is something incredibly special, and it's not meant to be treated so carelessly. You're not being fair to yourself and you're certainly not being fair to Austin. You can't use his feelings for you to manipulate him."

Payson's eyes were cold as they locked with hers. "You have no right to judge me, mom," she said. "You have no idea what I'm going through. You were pregnant with someone you love, someone who was going to start a family with you. I don't have that. Sasha might be playing the role of a husband like you said, but he's _not_ my husband. I'm alone, and I'll probably be alone for years. I'm not stupid enough to think that guys are going to be lining up to date the girl with a toddler at home. Austin ruined my life, so no, I don't feel too guilty about taking what I need from him."

"And you think that what you need is sex?" She thought that Payson was mature enough to handle this pregnancy, even with all of the complications and less than ideal circumstances, but this was childish.

"What I _need_ is a chance to forget how fucked up my life is for just a little while." Kim winced at her crude language, but chose to ignore it given what a difficult topic they were discussing. "And yeah, I do need to have a few good experiences before I resign myself to celibacy for the next several years. I don't want my only memory of sex to be the most devastating experience of my life."

That stopped Kim in her tracks. She wondered if Payson was exaggerating or if she really did consider that night to be the most devastating experience of her life. Kim knew that it had been devastating for her, but did she really consider it worse than breaking her back and losing gymnastics? "I don't know what to say here, Payson. You're right, I don't know what you're going through, and I don't understand how you're feeling, but I can't condone your actions. You're going to hurt a lot of people if you keep doing this."

"Austin knows exactly what this is, mom," she said, her tone conciliatory, like she was trying to make her mother understand. "I'm not lying to him and I'm not leading him on, and it's going to end long before Alex is born. I won't pretend like what I'm doing isn't going to affect my relationship with Austin, but it's better than spending the rest of my life blaming him. So you can disapprove all you want, but it's not going to change anything. It is how it is."

A car could be heard pulling into the driveway, and Kim wasn't sure if she should curse the timing or be thankful for it. Becca was home, which effectively put an end to her discussion with Payson, but maybe that was a good thing. She didn't have anything else to say that would help, and it didn't seem like she would be able to change Payson's mind. Payson was a different person now, and Kim didn't understand who that person was.

Becca raced into the living room to hug her sister and then talked ninety to nothing about how worried she'd been and how glad she was that Payson was okay. Kim went to the door to answer Mrs. Dashelet's polite inquiries about Payson's health and found herself actually grateful for the concern. Henrietta Dashelet was completely different than Summer Van Horne. She had been legitimately worried about Payson and was glad that she was okay, but she didn't pry for details and wasn't going to gossip about it. Kim made a mental not to get to know Henrietta better, because she had a feeling that they would get along well.

The rest of the day flew by. Becca talked non-stop until Kaylie, Lauren, and Emily arrived, at which point she went to her room because she was afraid that she would let something slip about the pregnancy. The four friends talked for about an hour until Sasha arrived to 'check on Payson.' The girls were barely out the door when Payson collapsed into a hug with him and muttered something into his shirt. It sounded a lot like "Take me home." Fifteen minutes later, they were gone and Kim was left alone with her worries and regrets.

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><p>AN: Holy crap, this was a really long chapter. Didn't even realize 'til I got ready to upload.

I haven't been responding to reviews much lately, so I just wanted to let each and every one of you know how much I appreciate your support :) It makes my day to see a new review in my inbox.

Okay, I'm going to sleep now. 'Night.


	21. Chapter 21

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

A/N: Wow, this chapter was way longer than I thought it was.

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><p>Waking up to the sound of Payson in his kitchen was relieving in a lot of ways. She hadn't cooked in several days because she was too tired, so he was glad that she was feeling well enough to get back to one of her favorite pastimes. On the most superficial level, he was happy that he was going to have a good breakfast again. On the most profound level, he was relieved that she was still there with him at all. Her dad had left it open for her to come back, but she chose to stay where she was. He didn't know what he would have done if she left. He couldn't imagine his apartment without her anymore.<p>

He rolled off the couch and headed toward the kitchen, stretching the knots out of his back as he went. Next time he bought furniture he was going to be more careful. The Keelers' couch was much more comfortable than his. He quirked a smile when she looked up at him and said, "It's nice to see you cooking again."

"It's nice to _be_ cooking again," she said, grinning. "Don't get me wrong, I'm so thankful that you took care of me while I was sick, but I was getting tired of eating food you brought home from Central Market."

He laughed. "I was getting tired of it, too. You have a special talent for making healthy food taste good." He glanced over her shoulder to see what she was making. Pancakes, probably whole-wheat, and blueberry sauce. He would bet his Olympic title that it tasted amazing.

They sat on the couch to eat as usual, and it occurred to Sasha that he should probably buy a table. The food did taste amazing, just as he predicted, and it was nice to just sit with her and enjoy breakfast again. She'd slept in everyday for the last week, so they hadn't had a chance to do this in a while.

While they ate, Payson said, "You know, I should probably figure out what I'm going to do when I turn eighteen. It's just a couple of weeks until my birthday. I've got the Olympics and whatever crazy press tour MJ makes me do, but I need to know where I'm going to live when that's done."

Sasha had been thinking about this too, and it was a conversation he was dreading. He'd gotten used to her living with him, and he wasn't so sure he wanted her to move out. They worked so well together. "I've been thinking about that," he said, putting his plate down on the coffee table, "and feel free to tell me I'm crazy, but maybe we should stay together for a while longer, at least until the baby is born. I don't like the idea of you living alone, or even living with Emily. She wouldn't be able to help you if you got sick again."

Her reaction surprised him. She set down her plate and leaned into him, settling into her favorite place against his chest, and said, "We'd have to get a bigger place, and three bedroom apartments are hard to find. We'd probably have to get a house."

"So you've thought about this already, huh?" He wasn't sure if she would still want to live with him once she didn't have to anymore, but he should have known better. They were so similar that he should have realized she felt the same way about it as he did. He couldn't help but smile.

"Umhm," she said, nuzzling into his shoulder. She picked at his t-shirt absentmindedly and asked, "So… just until the baby's born or longer?"

"Longer," he answered without hesitation. "For as long as you want me there."

She pulled away from him and smiled. "That's going to be for a long time, then."

She handed him his plate again and picked up hers, and they ate the rest of their breakfast while talking about finding a house suitable for them. It was an easy, comfortable conversation, and Sasha was disappointed when it was interrupted by a knock at the door.

He opened the door, expecting a neighbor come to borrow a cup of sugar or something. It had taken Payson all of three days to get to know his neighbors, and he'd had more people knock on his door in the last week and a half than he had in almost an entire year that he'd lived there. It wasn't a neighbor this time, though. It was a very unexpected MJ Martin.

"Hello, love."

He was too shocked to respond. He stood looking at her, unable to say anything, until the silence became so uncomfortable that MJ noticed. It was right about that time that Payson stopped on her way back from the kitchen to see who it was. She took one look at her manager, rolled her eyes, said, "It's like summoning the devil. I said her name once and she appears," and then walked back into the living room.

It was MJ's turn to stare with her mouth hanging open, but she recovered faster than Sasha. "What in the bleeding hell did I just interrupt?"

Payson scoffed from the living room and called back, "Breakfast."

MJ shoved past him to stand in front of her client, who was calmly folding his blanket like nothing was wrong. Hands on hips, the older woman demanded, "Have you lost your bloody mind, Payson? It's a week before the Olympics and you're shagging your coach?"

"Why does everyone think we're sleeping together?" she asked, ignoring MJ and looking at him.

"I think it might be justified this time," he said, laughing. "You are standing in my living room in your pajamas." Which were rather skimpy now that he thought about it. After the first couple of days he stopped noticing what Payson was wearing, at least consciously.

She turned back to MJ and motioned to the pillow and blanket she'd just stacked in the corner of the couch. "Obviously," she said, "Sasha is sleeping on the couch. We are not 'shagging.'"

"Then why are you here?"

She lost some of her bravado in the face of that question. They might have chosen to stay together, but the living arrangement had originated out of necessity, not choice; Payson was still a bit uncomfortable about that. She answered in a much more subdued tone. "My dad threw me out. I didn't have anywhere else to go."

MJ looked like she'd been slapped in the face. "You're dad, _Mark Keeler_, threw you out? What could you have possibly done that was bad enough to make him do that?"

Sasha understood her surprise. He knew what she'd done and he was still surprised by it. Mark Keeler was not the type of man who kicked his kids out of the house over a stupid mistake, or at least that was what he thought. Payson didn't answer the question. She just looked at him and said, "I'm going to take a shower," and then pushed past them to the bathroom.

MJ watched her go in disbelief, and Sasha took advantage of the moment of silence to say, "It's none of your bloody business why she and her dad are fighting, so drop it."

She turned on him like a teacher scolding a student. "It is my business if it affects her public persona. I've never met anyone so protective of their children as Mark Keeler, so if she did something bad enough to make him chuck her out of the house, it's bound to be bad enough to ruin her reputation. Whatever this is, I need to control it."

"Not unless she asks you to, you don't. Why are you even here?" As far as he knew, MJ wasn't scheduled to meet with Payson until they landed in London, and then only briefly. Payson had been adamant that the Olympics be about gymnastics, not publicity. The publicity stuff wasn't supposed to start until after she was done competing.

"NBC Universal wants footage of them training in the days leading up to the Olympics," she explained. "I left a message for you at the gym, but you never returned my call."

He tried to recall if he'd seen a message from her on his desk, but he couldn't remember. He'd been distracted the day before, anxious to get out and get back to Payson. "I've had more important things on my mind, MJ. With four girls getting ready for the Olympics and Payson in the hospital, I haven't had time to check my messages for days."

"What?" she shrieked.

He quickly thought through his last sentence to figure out what she was screaming about, and could have hit himself over the head when he figured it out. "Shit. I can't believe I just said that out loud. Listen, MJ, you are not using this as a publicity angle. She doesn't want people to know she's sick."

She narrowed her eyes and pinned him with her gaze. "How sick is she?"

"If this leaks I will personally kill you," he threatened, hating himself for letting it slip. "She has some kind of rare blood disease. Her blood cells are killing themselves. She had to get a transfusion to replace them."

She furrowed her eyebrows, confused. "Does this have something to do with why her dad kicked her out?"

"Not exactly," Payson's voice said from behind them. They turned to see her standing in the bedroom doorway, wearing jean shorts and a tank top with her wet hair piled on top of her head. Again, she ignored MJ and looked straight at him. "I called Austin."

He understood what she was telling him. She'd talked to Austin and they agreed to tell MJ. She was also telling him that she wasn't brave enough to do it this time. He kept his eyes locked on her as he said, "Payson's pregnant."

He heard rather than saw MJ collapsing to the couch. He ignored her. Payson walked straight to him and he enveloped her in his arms, not caring what his former flame thought of the intimate position. She burrowed her head into his neck, both thanking him for doing what she couldn't and asking him for support. MJ was the first non-family member she'd told, at least if you counted Sasha as family, which he did.

MJ broke into their moment. "You're pregnant?"

Payson pulled away from him and he used his thumbs to wipe away the tears that had collected in her eyes. She turned back to MJ and nodded. "Yeah, eight weeks. Pretty much on the dot."

"And you're keeping it?" she asked incredulously, somehow guessing Payson's intentions.

Payson narrowed her eyes, understanding the deeper condemnation beneath her agent's tone. "Yes, we're keeping him. And I would appreciate if you didn't refer to my child as _it_ anymore." Everyone called babies 'it' before they knew the sex, but there was something derogatory in the way MJ used the term. She thought any relationships outside of sex and business were useless, as Sasha knew all too well, so she would never be able to see a child as anything but a burden.

"Who's the father?"

"Austin Tucker," she said, not offering up any further details. MJ would only use them against her.

"And what does this have to do with your…" she waved her hand in the air as if that would explain what she meant, "you blood disease or whatever drivel Sasha was just spouting."

"Maybe nothing. I'm anemic, which is pretty common during pregnancy, and that might have triggered the eryptosis," Payson explained, managing to keep her cool. "But eryptosis is rare, so we don't know if the anemia caused it or if it caused the anemia. I may have had the problem even if I wasn't pregnant."

MJ seemed to come out of her shock and jumped right back into her role as Payson's agent. "If this ever comes out, we're going with the story that the disease had nothing to do with the pregnancy. We can't have people thinking that you did something to put the baby in danger. In fact, we're going to say that you didn't know you were pregnant until after the Olympics. You don't get a normal period, so it's perfectly reasonable for you not to know. Just don't go telling people how far along you are. If we knock you a couple weeks back nobody will suspect a thing."

Payson accepted the advice without complaint. She wouldn't say it, but she was concerned about her reputation, too. "You should know that I'm going to test positive for blood doping. It's supposed to stay confidential, but things don't always go the way they're supposed to. It could get leaked."

"Why are you going to test positive for blood doping?" It was proof of how shocked MJ was that she didn't catch on. Normally she was quick on the uptake.

"I had a blood transfusion. I may have more. That's going to show up on the drug screen. They've already waived the first transfusion and we're working on a TUE for any future ones, so I shouldn't send up any red flags. But shouldn't doesn't mean won't. You need to be prepared in case this gets out."

MJ nodded, slipping back into her professional persona again. "I'll get to work on it. We'll have a press release prepared if the test results leak, and one in case you look like hell and people start to notice you're sick. Now, you and Austin have to start acting like a couple. We're not ever going to confirm or deny a pregnancy, but when you start showing people need to automatically know who the father is. Having to guess makes you come off like a slag, not to mention that someone would inevitably guess it was Sasha."

Payson grimaced. "That'll be tough. The girls think I hate him. They'll notice if we suddenly start holding hands or something."

"Why do they think you hate him?" MJ asked warily.

Payson turned her head away again and Sasha knew that she couldn't answer. He laid a hand on her shoulder and she turned to hide her face in his chest while he explained, "Austin didn't take the news very well at first. He said some things about her. Loudly. The whole gym heard."

MJ asked what he said and he answered, even though he didn't want to. "Mostly he made accusations about us. Well, more about me. And he made some crude comments about having sex with her."

"Stage a make up," she suggested. "People stage break ups all the time, why should this be any different? Just have a loudly whispered discussion where he begs you for forgiveness and you resist for a little while and then give in. Problem solved."

Payson turned so that she could se MJ again, although she left her cheek pressed against his chest. "You want me to stage a make up for a relationship that doesn't even exist?"

"You mean you really were just shagging around?" She was really off her game today. He'd known MJ Martin since he was seventeen and he'd never seen her lose her professionalism like this. Even when they were sleeping together, she would put her clothes back on and get right back to work.

"MJ," he said, pulling Payson tighter against him, "This is not helping. Can we please get back to controlling the situation instead of making it worse?"

She pulled herself together again and started over. "You're right, Sasha. Payson, I'm sorry, that was completely inappropriate for me to say. It does, however, prove a point. If I was surprised enough to lose my cool, I can assure you that others will be as well. If you want to maintain even a shred of your reputation, you have to do this. Call Austin and set up your act. I'll give you until Wednesday, but when you pull up to that airport you and he are going to be lovey for the cameras. And be careful around Sasha. This," she said, gesturing to their intimate posture, "is not okay. There are rumors enough about the two of you already, we don't need any more."

"Fine, done," Payson responded, but she didn't draw out of their embrace. He suspected that he was actually supporting her full weight at this point. "But can we _please_ just stop talking about this? I've had a rough weekend and I really can't do this right now."

MJ nodded and headed toward the door. "Wednesday, Payson. Work this out however you want, but on Wednesday you're a couple whether you like it or not." Then she looked Sasha and said, "I'll be at the gym tomorrow morning with the camera crew. Make sure your girls are looking their best."

"Wait," Sasha said, halting her before she could open the door, "That's not going to work. If Austin has to come by the gym it needs to be in the morning before he leaves for Denver, and you can't catch that on tape."

She frowned, considering the options. She was contractually obligated to NBC Universal, but Sasha knew that she wouldn't jeopardize Payson's career by allowing her 'make up' to be recorded. "I could probably put it off until the afternoon and still make my deadline. Would that work?"

"Not really, no," Payson interrupted. "Not unless we want people to know I'm sick. I'm feeling better since the transfusion, but I'm not delusional enough to think that I can get through an entire day of training without wearing out. I'll last 'til noon at best."

"Why don't you come in a little later in the morning? Give Austin an hour to get in and out of the gym and then set up at nine o'clock. You can shoot Payson first, before she gets too tired, and then move on to Lauren, Emily, and Kaylie." Personally, he would rather they not be there at all, but he knew that wasn't an option. NBC Universal was practically the Word of God in U.S. gymnastics.

MJ agreed, and as soon as she was out the door Payson mumbled something into the fabric of his shirt. "I didn't quite catch that, Pay," he teased.

She pulled away from him and repeated herself. "I said I can't believe this is my life. Seriously, if someone told you when you first came to the Rock that one of us would get pregnant, wouldn't you have guessed Lauren?"

"Actually, I would have guessed Emily." She gave him a quizzical look and he elaborated. "She was all over the place when she first came here and she had some serious acceptance issues. I honestly wasn't sure if she would ever make it to the Olympics."

"Kaylie was boy-crazy; Lauren was slutty; Emily was needy. And yet… I can't change it now, though, so I shouldn't waste my time thinking about it. I have to go talk to Austin. We need to plan whatever is going to happen tomorrow."

She moved away from him but he grabbed her hand and pulled her back. "Payson, be careful."

As usual, she knew exactly what he was talking about. She raised one eyebrow and asked, "Really, we're having this conversation? Because I already talked about this with my mom and the answer is still the same: it's none of your business."

"I'm sure your mum was talking to you about this from an emotional standpoint. I'm not talking about emotionally, I'm talking about physically. You really think that it was a coincidence that you got sick right after the last time?"

"What is it with men?" she asked, jerking her hand away from his. "Yes, it was a coincidence. Pregnant women have sex all the time and it does not start morning sickness or kill your blood. Having sex did not make me sick."

Technically it did. Having sex got her pregnant, which in turn made her sick, but he didn't think he should point that out right then. Instead he asked, "What about the sunburn?"

Her cheeks turned scarlet at the implication and her answer was a little more subdued than her first fiery response. "No, it didn't cause this. Burning isn't really the problem about being outside while you're pregnant, overheating is. It was a cooler day and there was a breeze, so I wasn't anywhere close to overheating."

"Fine, you win. It was a coincidence," he admitted. "Listen, Pay, I can't stop you and I'm not going to try, but you need to be careful. You might feel better right now, but you are still sick, so nothing rough and no more having sex outside. Let him act like the man he ought to be and take care of _you_."

Instead of being embarrassed like she should have been, she chuckled and grinned up at him. "Did you seriously just give me sex advice as my _coach_? It's weird enough for you to say that to me as a friend, but you were definitely using your coaching voice. No wonder people think you cross lines with me."

He blushed and she laughed. "I'm just worried about you," he grumbled. "Someone has to look out for your health."

"Okay, I'm leaving," she said, still laughing. "I'll be sure to tell Austin how you think he should act in bed. He'll just _love_ that."

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><p>AN: MJ Martin… slightly horrible person, _completely_ awesome agent. She's fun to write anyway, and then I got to fit in the word 'slag,' which is my all time favorite British slang word, so I had a blast writing her this chapter :) Also, the fake make-up she suggested happens chapter after next, and it might be my favorite thing I've ever written.

Go ahead, click on the shiny blue button. You know you want to. I'm not above begging, and between being sick, finishing up grad school, getting licensed, and applying for jobs I really need some review love. Reviews are like sunshine; they make my day brighter. (Yes, even I'm cringing at how cheesy that was.)


	22. Chapter 22

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

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><p>Sex had not entered Austin's mind when Payson called to say she was coming over. On another day it might have, but she was sick. She'd just gotten out of the damn hospital. He didn't even think sex was a possibility right then. Which was why it surprised him so much that, when he opened the door, Payson drew him into one of the most passionate kisses he had ever been a part of.<p>

He pushed away from her and asked, "Payson, what the hell are you doing."

"I thought that was rather obvious," she said, grabbing his hand and heading for the bedroom.

He was completely befuddled by her behavior. "Are you even healthy enough for this right now?" he asked, following her without thought. "I mean, two days ago you were too weak to even kiss me, and now you want to have sex?"

"Austin," she said, pressing her mouth hard against his, "Shut up." She made sure that he did so by claiming his tongue for other purposes. She backed them toward the bed and broke their kiss long enough to pull her tank top over her head. As soon as she dropped the shirt she was kissing him again; he heard a soft rustle as her shorts hit the floor and she kicked them away from her ankles.

She sat on the bed and moved herself to the center, leaning back on her elbows and looking like a goddess. It was a lost cause. He was too weak to say no. "I'm not at full strength yet, so you should probably be gentle with me. I might not be able to participate much, but I _need_ this."

He couldn't deny her anything. He was gentle, holding her and touching her like she might break at any minute. She was more passive than she had been with him previously, neither trying to give him pleasure nor actively seeking her own, so he sought to please her in every way possible. He used every trick he knew to bring her pleasure, ignoring his own needs in order to fulfill hers. When she shattered beneath him for the second time, he finally allowed himself to fall over the edge with her. In the seven years since he'd first had sex, he'd never experienced anything quite so intense as he just had while putting Payson's needs ahead of his own.

His bliss was shattered when he opened his eyes to find Payson lying beside him with a tear slipping down her cheek.

"Payson?" he asked, panicking. "What's wrong? Did I hurt you?"

She shook her head but another tear managed to leak from beneath her closed eyes. "No, it wasn't you. You were wonderful. It's just… I'm scared. What if I don't get better?"

"You will," he promised. He stroked his fingers across her cheek and bent to press his lips against hers again. "You will get better."

She fell asleep and he sat watching her, but he couldn't help but notice that she didn't sleep on his chest the way she did on Sasha's. He couldn't shake the feeling that he was just a place holder in her life until she could have the man she really wanted, and that maybe the real reason she didn't want a long term relationship with him was because she was waiting for Sasha. He wasn't sure if he should be angry at her for using him or thankful that he was getting to be with her at all.

He was so lost in his thought that he didn't notice when she woke up, so he was startled when she said, "You know, I really didn't come over here just to have sex and fall asleep in your bed."

He smiled down on her. "I wouldn't have minded if you did."

"Yes you would have." She was right. He wanted an actual relationship with her, one that she wouldn't give him. It bothered him that all she wanted from him was sex.

"I'm assuming that you wanted to talk about MJ, right? What did she have to say about this?"

She sat up in bed, not bothering to pull the sheet up with her. For someone who used to have body image issues, she certainly had no qualms about nudity. "She wants us to start acting like a couple, so that people will know you're the father when I start showing."

"Okay, that's not a problem. There will be cameras everywhere in London, we shouldn't have any trouble selling that to the media." This plan had the added benefit of throwing him and Payson together more often, which he was more than willing to comply with.

"Selling it to the media won't be a problem," she said, biting her lip, "but selling it to my friends will. They're not going to just accept that we're together after what happened at the Rock. MJ thinks we should stage a make up at the Rock tomorrow."

"Stage a make up? How are we supposed to do that?" He'd heard of staging break ups before, but never staging make ups. He didn't have a clue how to pull off something like this.

Payson bit her lip again. "You'd have to come to the gym and beg me for forgiveness. And we'd have to act like we were dating for a while before all of that happened."

"Okay, I can do that. I already begged you for forgiveness once, why not do it again in front of a crowd?" He was joking, but he also knew he couldn't let the potential embarrassment of the show stop him from doing it. He humiliated Payson with what he said, so groveling at her feet was a more than acceptable punishment.

"I think—and I know this makes me a horrible friend—but I think that we should use me being sick as an excuse. That would explain away a lot of things, like why I was crying that morning, why I cut back my training and why I had sex with you in the first place. The girls know it wasn't a good experience, so we stick to the truth about that with a few embellishments."

That did kind of make her a horrible friend, because Emily, Kaylie, and Lauren were already worried enough about her, but he didn't comment on it. He had other concerns, though. "What kind of embellishments?"

"We change the timeline, obviously, so that we had sex the night before the…"

"Event?" he suggested, knowing that Payson was only trying to spare him by not calling it a freak out or meltdown or something.

"Right, the event. And I was drunk because I was upset, not because of… whatever reason I was drunk in St. Louis." He wasn't sure if she was trying to spare him again by not mentioning the fact that he got her drunk, or if she really just didn't know the reason.

"Sounds easy enough," he said, "but why do we need to know these details at all? Are we really going to bring them up in our fake make up?"

She snorted. "I doubt it, but the other girls are going to ask and we both need to know the answers."

"Okay, then what were my reasons for… the event?" he asked. He couldn't very well tell the truth.

"We were already fighting about having sex, and then I told you I was sick and you freaked out and then got mad because I told Sasha first and you're a jealous idiot. Which is pretty much all true if you replace 'sick' with 'pregnant.'"

Harsh but true. He knew he'd acted like a complete dumbass that day, letting his anger and jealously get the better of him. Which is why he also knew that he had to do whatever it took to make it up to her, including making an idiot out of himself in front of the entire gym… again.

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><p>AN: Okay, I don't want to spoil for anyone who hasn't seen tonight's episode, so I'm going to be a vague as possible. I hate what they did, but I love the way they did it. They did justice to her.

Also, the psycho bitch turned out to be even more psycho than I thought. Which is pretty damn bad considering that I already thought she needed to be institutionalized.

Virtual Sasha-kisses to everyone who reviews. (Yes, Ida, I did just steal from your trademark :D So you get double Sasha-kisses.)


	23. Chapter 23

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

A/N: And I bring you the "make up" scene... One of my favorite things I've ever written :)

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><p>Emily felt like an idiot being in full make up with her hair done up for a normal practice. She hated when camera crews came to the Rock, and she thought that this particular torture was already over with. They had shot all of their promotional footage three weeks ago after they made the Olympic team.<p>

Sasha had just told them that there was a hold up with MJ's crew and they wouldn't be there for at least another hour, which annoyed Emily to no end. That meant one more hour where she had to prance around the gym looking like a Barbie doll. Kaylie and Lauren didn't mind, they always loved the chance to dress up, but she thought that Payson would be as frustrated as she was. She didn't look frustrated, though. Mostly she just looked tired.

They had just finished stretching and were about to move to do a floor rotation, because vault and bars would mess up their hair, when the entire gym went silent. She followed the line of faces to the door and understood exactly why everybody was so quite all of a sudden. Nobody wanted to make any sudden movements and set off the ticking bomb that had just walked into their gym: Austin Tucker.

Payson swore under her breath and headed toward him with a determined set to her jaw. Emily looked at the other two and they all discreetly followed.

"Austin, what are you doing here?" Payson was whispering. "Do you have a death wish? Because Sasha will kill you if he catches you here."

"I don't give a damn about Sasha, I need to talk to you. I heard you were in the hospital this weekend. Is it true?"

Payson crossed her arms. "It's none of you business if I was or wasn't. You're not my boyfriend anymore, so what happens in my life isn't any of your concern. You made it _perfectly_ clear that you don't care about me."

He wasn't her boyfriend anymore. This was news to Emily. As far as she knew, Austin had never _been_ Payson's boyfriend.

"Damnit, Payson," he said, his voice rising slightly above the whisper they'd been using. "How many times do I have to apologize? You know I care about you. You know I didn't mean any of that stuff I said."

"Then why did you say it?" she asked, wiping tears from her eyes.

"Because—" he threw his hands up in the air in frustration. "Because I'm a jackass. We were already fighting about the night before and then you drop this huge bomb on me and I just… I didn't know how to handle it, okay? I know I'm a jerk and I've regretted it every day since, but I freaked out."

Payson was crying harder now, her chest beginning to heave as she fought to control her breath. "You are a jerk and that's why I don't want to be with you anymore. I needed you and you bailed. And for what? Because I told Sasha first? When your girlfriend tells you she's sick, you're reaction should not be jealousy. You should have comforted me, not accused me."

So Lauren was right. Payson already knew she was sick when all the stuff with Austin happened.

He cupped her face but she pulled back, away from his touch. "I'm sorry, Pay. Really, I am. You know Sasha's always been a sore spot for me, but I wasn't jealous, not really. I understand why you told him first, but I was scared, and it was easier to latch on to my anger from our fight than to admit that I was terrified of losing you."

"Well, you lost me anyway. I can't forgive you for this. You abandoned me when I needed you most."

"Please, Payson," he begged, cupping her face again. This time she didn't pull away. "Please forgive me. I love you. And I know you still love me."

"I don't," she said, shaking her head. "Not anymore."

Emily couldn't believe what she was hearing. Austin loved her? And she used to love him? She didn't understand how her friend could have kept something like this from them. But then again, Kaylie had kept her relationship with Carter a secret for a whole year.

Austin leaned down to kiss Payson, just a gentle brush of his lips against hers, and then pulled away again. "Can you still tell me that you don't love me?"

"I don't love you."

He kissed her again, deeper than the first, and this time she pressed her lips against his in return. "I don't love you," she said with a sob.

He pulled her against his chest and kissed her for a third time and Payson responded fully. It was so passionate and so full of devotion that Emily felt like a voyeur just watching it. "I don't love you," Payson cried, clinging to the lapels of his leather jacket like a lifeline. She buried her head in his shirt and cried, her sobs wracking her body. Austin stroked her hair and planted kisses to the top of her head until her tears abated. When she stopped crying, they stood with their foreheads pressed together having a whispered conversation, too soft for the words to carry. Periodically they would press their lips together, and when it seemed that their conversation was finally at an end, Austin lifted her mouth to his for a lingering kiss.

When he left, Payson stood for a minute looking after him before heading in the direction of the girls' bathroom, wiping her face with the back of her hand as she went.

The three girls stood staring at each other before they came to a voiceless joint decision. Lauren dug through Payson's gym bag to find her makeup case and they followed her to the bathroom.

She was washing her face when they came in, effectively taking off all of her makeup, which had been ruined by her crying anyway. They didn't say a word. Lauren just took the wet paper towel from Payson's hand and started to remove the mascara stains from below her eyes. They didn't speak until Lauren started applying a new layer of foundation to Payson's face.

"How long?" Emily asked.

"Four months."

Kaylie winced at the number. She and Austin had only lasted for two and a half months. "Why didn't you tell us?" she asked.

Payson ignored her and Lauren and looked straight at Kaylie. "I didn't want to hurt you."

Kaylie nodded, not bothering to question it. Payson's reasons for hiding the relationship were a lot more honorable than Kaylie's had been for lying about her and Carter.

Lauren asked the question that was weighed heaviest on their minds. "How long have you known you were sick?"

"About two weeks," she answered, "It's why I…"

She didn't need to finish the sentence because they all knew what she meant. That's why she slept with Austin, just like they surmised, although they didn't know at the time that she was actually dating him.

"What's wrong?" Emily asked, afraid to hear the answer. Lauren had mentioned cancer…

Payson shrugged and Lauren told her to be still if she didn't want to get poked in the eye with her eyeliner. "It's pretty much what I've already told you. My body doesn't have enough iron; my blood is dying. They don't know why. It just got bad a lot faster than they thought it would."

"I know this is a really personal question," Lauren said as she applied Payson's lip gloss, "But I thought… I got the impression that things were bad, but if you were in love with him…"

Payson frowned, marring Lauren's beautiful make up job with her sad expression. "Sometimes that's not enough. I was drunk. We both were, and I didn't really know what I was doing. It was over fast, and it hurt, and he passed out on top of me afterward, and I just… I wish I had never done it. I wish that I could go back and erase that whole night."

Emily couldn't really understand—her first time with Damon had been wonderful—but Lauren nodded her head sympathetically.

"Can you really just forgive him like that?" Kaylie asked. "I mean, what he did was so horrible. How can you move past that?"

"I don't know. I don't know if I _can_ move past it, but I have to try. I made mistakes too, so I can't just keep blaming him forever."

Emily glanced nervously between Payson and Kaylie, uncomfortable with the situation and knowing that they were too. "I think this is enough deep conversation for today, guys," she said, trying to break up their impromptu team meeting. "We're leaving for the Olympics in three days and we have a camera crew coming any minute. Let's go train."

"Emily's right," Payson said, "Let's go train." As she passed by on the way to the door, she mouthed the words "thank you." Lauren and Kaylie followed her and Emily trailed behind them, heading out to the gym to start the final countdown to the Olympics.

* * *

><p>AN: Payson's a pretty good actress, huh? I don't think Austin was acting much, though. That's pretty much just what he felt.

I've been getting a lot of questions about the Sasha/Payson and Austin/Payson stuff, so let's see if I can clarify a little bit. I'm a Sasha/Payson shipper, so you know where this is ultimately heading, but Payson's journey is pretty epic and it doesn't center around Sasha. It centers around the baby. So she has to find a way to work things out with Austin before she can be with Sasha, and that takes them through a romance. Austin and Payson are going to move through a romance to a friendship, while Payson and Sasha go through a friendship into a romance. I would have tagged the story for all three of them, but that kind of ruins the first chapter for the new readers :)

Reviews make me really happy. Just sayin' :)

P.S. Grad schools almost over, so I'm going to start responding to people again soon, I promise.


	24. Chapter 24

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

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><p>Payson had been quiet the past couple of days. She was still active, still living a normal life outside of the gym and holding up tolerably well inside of it, but the fear and stress were finally getting to her. When she came home for Austin's house the other day, she sat and cried on his shoulder for over an hour, finally admitting a new fear that she wasn't going to get well. It was a legitimate fear, too. The doctors <em>thought<em> that fixing her iron levels would solve the problem, but they didn't really know what caused the eryptosis in the first place, so there was no guarantee.

She had too much stress in her life and Sasha was worried that she wouldn't even make it to the Olympics, much less through them. She had the giant, overarching fears of losing the baby, being a mother, and being sick all hanging over her head, along with the more minor stress of training, her stupid fake relationship with Austin, and the status of her TUE. Her health was slowly but steadily declining, and it was becoming more apparent everyday that she was going to need another transfusion. If her TUE wasn't passed quickly, she wouldn't to be allowed to compete.

She was asleep on top of his chest, which was the way that she'd fallen asleep for the past three nights, and just like the past three nights he lifted her in his arms and carried her to bed. She was dead to the world when he laid her down, so he flipped the covers back and pulled off her jeans before he covered her back up. The first few times he put her to bed he had been hesitant to undress her, feeling that it was a line that shouldn't be crossed and knowing instinctively that it would be a bad idea for him to have a picture of Payson Keeler in her underwear engraved in his mind. His need to take care of her overcame his reservations in the end, though, when she mentioned casually one morning how much she hated sleeping in her clothes. Now he barely even thought about it. She had never brought up the fact that he undressed her, but she didn't seem bothered by it. She always put on shorts before she came out in the morning, but she seemed to have no qualms about her state of undress while they sat up together with her morning (night) sickness.

He was turning to leave when her fingers caught against his and she said his name softly. It was too similar to the way she sounded in the hospital for his comfort. He crouched down by the bed so that they were at eye level and she entwined her fingers with his.

"Stay," she whispered. He couldn't. He knew it wasn't a good idea. In fact, it was as far away from a good idea as you could possibly get, but then she said, "Please," and he couldn't say no. There was so much fear in the word, so much that she couldn't or wouldn't say out loud. Children are scared to sleep alone because they are afraid of monsters, but no child would ever realize that they might grow up and be scared to sleep alone for entirely different, much worse reasons.

He squeezed her hand and nodded. "I'll be right back," he told her, and then collected his pajamas from his dresser and went into the bathroom to change. When he came back out, Payson had changed into her own pajamas, probably just barely awake enough to realize that sleeping together was a bad idea, but sleeping together while she was in her underwear was an even worse idea.

He moved to the other side of the bed and laid down beside her, and she immediately settled herself on top of him. It was nothing new. He was used to her lying on top of him, or pressing herself so close to him in a hug that they were practically the same person, but it was somehow different in the context of a bed. Even as intimate as they were on a daily basis, this was on a whole new level. Sasha was torn between being weary of the lines they were crossing and the more natural comfort of lying in the arms of the person he cared most about in the world.

His t-shirt grew damp beneath her head, and he realized that she was crying silently against him. Considering all that had happened to her in the past few weeks, he was accustomed to her crying on his shoulder, but he had never experienced her like this. When Payson cried, she wept. There was no holding back, no gentle tears, just a pure, cleansing flood of emotions. But this, this was complete and utter desolation, a fear so deep that she couldn't even bring it to the surface to release it.

He pulled her closer and whispered in her ear, "It'll be okay, Payson. I promise, it'll all be okay."

It was an empty promise and they both knew it.

o-O-o

Austin kept craning his head, looking for the standard issue white suburban that would bring the Rock girls and their coach to Denver Elite. Every member of the U.S. Gymnastics Olympic team had converged on DE over the past day and a half, and the Rock gymnasts would be the last to arrive.

Their plane left at six o'clock in the afternoon, so everybody had put in a solid half day of practice before loading their luggage onto the coach bus that would take them to the airport together. Everybody, that is, except for Payson. While Emily, Kaylie, and Lauren practiced at the Rock, Payson was at doctor appointments. He was the only person privy to that information other than the Rock gymnasts. He wasn't even sure if the NGO knew about it.

They pulled into the parking lot at one o'clock, exactly on time, but it felt to Austin like they were hours late. He needed to talk to Payson to see how she and the baby were. As soon as she was out of the car he bounded over to her. He stepped as close to her as possible and whispered, "What did the doctor say? Is everything alright?"

She shook her head and his heart plummeted. She whispered back to him, "Alex is fine. I'm not."

If anyone overheard they wouldn't understand what she was saying, but he did. He didn't know when she picked out a name, but she was clearly telling him that the baby was healthy. But she wasn't.

"Come on," he said, taking her hand and leading her onto the empty bus where they could talk in private. Sasha would handle her luggage and whatever last minute details needed to be dealt with. They sat down in two seats near the middle of the bus so that they would have time to cut off their conversation if anyone else came on board. "Tell me what happened, Pay."

"They did an ultrasound and Alex is fine, and Dr. Lehmann said that the chance that I will miscarry is way down now because he's getting so far into development," she told him, and he breathed a sigh of relief. "I wanted you to see him, but I couldn't risk bringing the recording or picture with me in case someone saw it. It was amazing, Austin. He's getting so big, and he's starting to look like a little person now, with arms and legs and everything."

"What about you? Won't you being sick affect him, too?"

Payson shook her head no. "Dr. Lehmann said that as long as we keep my blood under control that he'll be fine even if I'm sick. He said that babies take what they need first, so that even if I don't have enough red blood cells to support _me_, I have enough to support him."

"But you don't have enough to support you?" he asked, frowning. She had said by the car that the baby was fine but she wasn't.

She bit her lip and her eyes filled with tears. "My hematocrit is already down four percent. If it drops another three I have to get another transfusion. It's happening faster than they thought it would. Dr. Owen said that he thought the last one would last me for at least two weeks before my levels dropped too low, but at this rate I'm not even going to make it to qualifying before I need another one."

This disease or whatever it was just kept sounding worse and worse. "And they still don't know what caused it? It could have been my fault, for getting you pregnant?" He would never forgive himself if something happened to Payson because of him.

"No," she insisted, shaking her head. "Dr. Owen doesn't think the pregnancy caused this anymore. He said that the problem was probably dormant in my system anyway and that Alex using all of my iron just sped up the process. It would have happened eventually anyway. Besides, it isn't your fault that I got pregnant. We both made mistakes that night."

Austin wasn't sure if he believed her or not, but he let it slide, knowing that Payson probably didn't want to talk about it anymore. He changed the subject. "So… Alex, huh?"

She looked uncomfortable with that subject, too, which surprised him. Talking about the baby had been the only thing that made her really happy since she got sick. "Yeah," she said with a grimace, "After Sasha."

He should have been angry about this. If she told him a week ago he would have been angry about it. Now, however, he was focused on his complete lack of surprise. After what he saw in the hospital, he felt like he should have expected it. "What if it's a girl?" he asked.

She seemed taken aback that he wasn't upset about the name choice. He was upset, of course, it just wasn't the primary thought in his head at the moment. "Aly," she answered. "Either Alexandru Mark Tucker or Alexandra Ava Tucker. As long as… you don't mind me using Ava's name."

"No, of course I don't mind. I would love that. And she'll be so honored." He was less inclined to be mad about the first name knowing that the baby would carry his last name and possibly his sister's name. "I wasn't sure if you were going to use Tucker or Keeler. I'm glad you chose Tucker."

"He's your son, Austin," she said, taking his hand and squeezing it. "Of course he'll have your last name."

Someone knocked on the door and opened it, putting an end to their conversation. It was Sasha. "Am I interrupting anything?" he asked, being well aware of why they came onto the bus.

"No," Payson said, shooting him a small smile. "I think we've pretty much covered all of the important stuff. Did you need us for something?"

"Yeah, Marcus wants everybody together for some pictures before we leave. You two are the only ones missing."

Payson was a fantastic actress. As soon as she stepped off the bus she was laughing and smiling, pretending that she didn't feel like shit and her world wasn't crashing down around her. Nobody noticed that someone was supporting her weight when at all possible. In the group pictures Austin had his arm securely around her waist, holding her up so that the only façade she had to maintain for the endless camera shots was her smile. Likewise, when the pictures were of just the girls' team, Emily, Lauren, and Kaylie always found a way for one of them to be on either side of Payson with their arms linked together behind her, allowing her to lean against their braced arms.

MJ would have been proud of the act he and Payson put on. Well, really, it was only an act on Payson's side. His actions were all real. These photos would be posted on the USA Gymnastics website, and they managed to be cuddled together in most of the pictures and even sneaked a kiss into a few of them. They looked like a real couple, and he felt like they were a real couple for a while, too. When they all loaded onto the bus for the ride to the airport, though, the mask crumbled. She leaned against him, completely exhausted by pretending to be well for an entire hour, but he could tell that she really wanted to be resting against Sasha's shoulder instead of his.

She was asleep as soon as her head found his shoulder, and she didn't wake up until they reached the airport nearly an hour later. Lauren came and did a quick make up job on her so that she didn't look quite so pale, and then they started the act all over again. She plastered a big, fake smile on her face, happily answered all of the paparazzi's questions about how excited she was, and rolled her eyes when they asked about her relationship with him like they were idiots for missing something so obvious. She pulled it off beautifully, and then as soon as they were past security she was asleep on his shoulder again.

He had a quickly whispered conversation with Sasha, the result of which was that Payson was woken and they left to 'go get coffee' because she was so sleepy, and the team doctor followed discretely after them. The airport had a small nurse's area in case of any injuries in the terminal, and they were allowed to use it for the check up.

"I'm fine," she insisted as the doctor took her blood pressure, "Really. It's just the pretending that wore me out so much. It's hard to act like you feel well when you really don't."

Austin wasn't so sure, but the doctor seemed to agree with her. "Your blood pressure and heart rate aren't ideal, but they aren't indicative of any serious bodily distress. Eat a banana to get your energy back up and relax a little bit, and then if you don't feel better before we take off we'll take another look at you."

The doctor left them alone, and he sat watching her while she ate, trying to discern any sign that she was feeling worse than she claimed. Payson noticed and was annoyed. "The doctor said I'm fine, Austin. Stop looking at me like I'm going to keel over at any minute."

"I'm sure he's a great doctor," he said, "but he's not a hematologist. A normal doctor won't know what's what with you."

She rolled her eyes, and the successful expression made him feel a little better. When she'd been really sick she wasn't able to roll her eyes. "I saw my hematologist this morning and he said I was fine, at least for another couple of days. I can make it 'til my next appointment, and if I can't I'll let someone know. I'm not going to put Alex in danger."

They got Payson a glass of orange juice—in a coffee cup, of course, to keep up appearances—and walked back to the terminal gate to rejoin their teams. Kaylie, Lauren, and Emily leaned forward when they got back, eager for news, and he nodded once to let them know that everything was okay. They rolled with it really well, and sat chatting with her until it was finally time to board the plane. Sasha, who was a commanding enough presence to lead both the men's and women's teams when they were grouped together, instructed them all to go to sleep during the nine hour flight, because it would be ten o'clock in the morning London time when the landed and they would be headed straight to the gym for practice. Austin couldn't hold back his snort, but Sasha didn't look offended. He knew exactly what Austin was snorting about—like Payson needed any encouragement to sleep on the plane.

* * *

><p>AN: We're off to the Olympics! A lot happens in London, so get ready for a crazy ride :D

Fantasylover101 brought up something that I intended to put in a note a long time ago and never remembered to do, about the drug tests. Athlete drug tests don't include a pregnancy test. It would be completely unethical for them to invade the athlete's privacy like that. The only things they test for are illegal drugs and substances that could be considered performance enhancing. MIOBI made that up for a plot line, kind of like they did with all the pharmacy stuff (I could get on a soap box about that. I used to work as a pharm tech and NONE of what happened in that scene was true).

This story has nearly 200 reviews now, so let's all review and get us past that milestone :) Some of you silent readers go review and let me know what you think!


	25. Chapter 25

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

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><p>Kelly Parker had never had such a difficult time digging up the information she needed. It had been nearly three weeks and she still didn't know why Austin Tucker was training at her gym now, and she had been completely shocked when Payson Keeler showed up the day before and started kissing him in front of everybody. She kept up on the dating gossip, and she'd never heard anything about Keeler and Tucker being a couple.<p>

It all seemed to come back around to Payson Keeler. Kelly would bet her life that Austin left the Rock because of her, she just didn't know why. As far as she could tell they were perfectly happy together. There was something else going on, too, though. Payson's boyfriend and groupies were hanging around her like mama bears protecting their cub, and Kelly was almost certain that the team doctor had sneaked away to speak with her. The timing of her departure and his was too coincidental. But what really tipped the scales on her 'something is fucked up'-o-meter was when Marcus McGowan asked to speak with the team captains and Emily Kmetko stepped up.

She spun around to face the other five girls in the gym with her—her three teammates and two alternates—and demanded, "Since when is Kmetko our team captain? I thought we voted Keeler for that position at our team meeting."

"Payson stepped down," Kaylie answered calmly, like it was no big deal. "We chose Emily as her replacement."

"And why wasn't _I_ contacted about this decision?" she asked, offended that they had left her out of the vote.

Lauren Tanner laughed. "Duh, because the exact same thing would have happened voting on Emily as did when we voted on Payson. It would be six to one, because you would insist on voting for yourself."

That wasn't true. It wouldn't have been six to one, because she would have been able to convince the alternates not to vote for Emily and maybe even mind trick Kmetko into not voting for herself. She didn't have a shot in hell against Keeler and she knew it—she had voted for herself out of principle—but she might have been able to beat out Emily. She was only competing on two events for God's sake.

She tried a new tactic. "Why on _earth_ would you step down, Payson? Aren't you supposed to be all about the team or some bullshit like that?"

Lauren glared at her and rubbed Payson's back. "You don't have to tell her anything, Payson. It's none of her business."

"It is her business, actually," Payson said with a sigh. "She's a member of the team and she deserves to know, and so do Andrea and Beth, especially since one of them might need to compete if I can't. I wouldn't be able to hide it from them anyway."

Judging by the looks on Andrea and Beth's faces, they didn't know what she was talking about anymore than Kelly did. "I'd just like the point out that we," she pointed to herself and the alternates, "don't have any idea what you're talking about. So could you please share with the class?"

"I'm sick."

She stepped back from Payson. "Should I not be standing next to you? Am I going to catch something?"

Payson sat down on the floor, presumably to stretch but really looking more like she was going to fall over if she didn't sit. "Not that kind of sick," she said as they joined her on the floor. "There's something wrong with my blood. My red blood cells are killing themselves and we don't really know why."

She heard Andy and Beth asking questions, but she wasn't paying any attention to them. She didn't know anything about the kind of sickness that Payson was talking about, but 'there's something wrong with my blood' sounded pretty damn dire. She and Payson weren't really friends, per se, but Kelly respected her, a hell of a lot more than she respected any of her other teammates. Payson had been her only real competition for a long time—Kaylie totally didn't count, she won Nationals on a fluke—and winning at the Olympics because Keeler was too sick to compete wouldn't be like winning at all.

"What can I do to help?"

They all turned and looked at her like she was crazy, which maybe she was. "What? I'm not a complete bitch. I don't want to win just because my competition had to drop out, that's totally not fair."

"Thanks, Kelly," Payson said, sending her a small smile. "But there really isn't much you can do. Just don't tell anybody. I don't want people to know I'm sick."

"And don't make a fuss when she has to sit out," Kaylie added, stating as a fact that Payson would need to sit out practice. Apparently this was not a new development. "Just move on and act like nothing's out of the ordinary. The NGO agreed to monitor the video footage going out so it doesn't look like Payson's sick, and that will be a lot easier if we act normal."

She, Beth, and Andrea all voiced their agreement and the moved on from the subject, mainly because Payson was uncomfortable with the attention. As soon as Emily rejoined the group they really got down to work, all too aware that Qualifying was three days away, but Kelly kept an eye on Payson. She wanted to gauge how sick she really was, and she didn't like what she saw.

Normally, Payson trained like Kelly did. They were always the first ones in the gym and the last ones out, and took the fewest breaks. The Payson Keeler she saw today was nothing like that. Out of the five hours they trained, Payson was sitting down for at least two of them. Actually _sitting down_, not doing anything but drinking water or eating an energy bar, and half the time leaning against Sasha or Austin, whichever one happened to be sitting by her at the time. Whenever she was on an apparatus, their other teammates watched her like a hawk, and Austin was completely neglecting his own training to spot her. It was a good thing that the U.S. had gone completely overboard and built a multi-million dollar training facility for all its athletes, because if they had been training in the shared international gym, everyone would be gossiping about her.

When they finally got to the Olympic Village more than fifteen hours after they left Denver, Payson went straight to bed. Emily gave her the only single person room in their tiny little apartment, and Kelly didn't even bother to complain because she felt so bad for her. When they all went out to explore the rest of the Village, Payson slept straight through. She wasn't even aware when Austin came to sit by in her room, just in case she needed anything while her roommates were gone.

When all was said and done, Kelly had never been so scared for someone in her life.

* * *

><p>AN: Oh, Kelly I love you so much. Don't take her too seriously, though, folks, 'cause she's a little full of herself still and her world view is a little bit skewed. (FYI, the U.S. really did build a mulit-million dollar training facility for its athletes in London. Not making that up.)

I can't say anything about the show without spoilers, so I'm just going to say this: OMFG.

Review! Review! Review! (In my head this sounds like Castle's ring tone for his daughter that says Dad! Dad! Dad! But now I'm mixing shows :D) I have a final exam tomorrow, so give me something good to take my mind off of it ;)


	26. Chapter 26

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

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><p>Marty waited until they were behind closed doors to start asking questions. Sasha was at least thankful for the privacy, if still completely annoyed by Marty's snooping.<p>

They retreated to the bedroom they would be sharing during the Games, one tiny cubicle in the flat that would be inhabited by the men's and trampoline coaches as well. It was bad enough that he had to share a flat with five other men, but living in the same room with Marty Walsh for two weeks might kill him. Or he might kill Marty.

"What the hell is going on with Payson?"

He'd expected an inquisition, but it still pissed him off. He would have to deal with the men's coaches as well, he was sure, due to Austin's behavior. They could deal with Austin themselves if they wanted to. Sasha was not going to try and stop him from taking care of the mother of his child.

"You saw her routines today," he replied, avoiding the question. "They were perfect. That is all you need to concern yourself with. What does it matter if she sits out practice as long as she can still win?"

Marty got in his face like he was going to start a fight, but then his common sense kicked in and he stepped back. "That's all you care about, whether or not she can win? Are you really that much of a bastard?"

"The next time you suggest that I don't care about Payson's well being," he growled, taking a single menacing step toward his roommate, "I will knock you unconscious. It's my job to look out for Payson; it's your job to look out for Kelly. Payson is a very private person, and she doesn't need you nosing around in her life. Take care of your own gymnast and leave mine alone."

"Then what about Austin?" he asked. "He's my gymnast, too, although the reason for that switch has never been fully explained to me. Whatever is going on with Payson is affecting his training as well, and like you said, it's my job to look out for him."

Sasha actually laughed. "By all means, ask him about it. I'm pretty sure he'll tell you to go to hell. If you want him to train harder, then _you_ talk to him. I am not going to try to stop him from being concerned about his girlfriend, Marty."

"So she's his girlfriend now, when the hell did that happen? Three weeks ago he shows up at my gym out of the blue, asking to train. And then two weeks ago you kicked him out of _my_ gym over one of the girls, which I think I can safely assume now was Payson, but all of a sudden they're a happy couple? I'm not an idiot, Sasha."—that was arguable—"I know something's going on here."

"They had a fight. They made up. She's a teenager, that's not so unusual."

"Maybe not," Marty agreed, "but Payson sitting out practice is, so I'm going to ask you again. What's going on with her?"

He knew it would come back around to this. Marty was like a dog with a bone, and he wasn't going to shut up until he got some answers. "I think it's pretty obvious, Marty. She's sick. And she doesn't want people to know about it. She has a right to her privacy."

Marty blanched, which looked strange with his dark complexion. Sasha begrudgingly had to admit that no matter how much Marty annoyed him sometimes, he did still care about those girls. "How sick?"

"Sick enough that they don't know how to fix it." He didn't bother trying to hide the fear in his voice. He was terrified for her.

"Christ. Is she really okay to compete?" He couldn't blame Marty for the question, because he'd asked it to himself a thousand times.

"I don't know."

o-O-o

Sasha was going over the day's training plans with Marty, since he would be at the hospital with Payson instead of at the gym that day, when he heard a pounding at the door. Kevin yelled at whoever it was to hold their horses as he went to answer the door, and a few seconds later Payson was storming into their living room, looking like hell and carrying a newspaper in her hand.

She tossed it in his lap and he picked it up to see a large picture of her on the front page with the bold-print headline: AMERICA'S SWEETHEART—NOT SO SWEET.

"Someone leaked my test results."

He swore and threw the paper away from him. "Did you call MJ yet so that she can handle it?"

"She called me. That's how I found out about it. She's already put out a press release, and the NGO and IOC are both putting out one as well, but the damage is already done. Nobody lives down a doping charge. This taints my entire career."

"Christ, love, your shaking." He stood up and rubbed his hands up and down her arms, trying to calm her down. "Are you really that upset about this? We knew it was a possibility."

She shook her head and her body swayed with the movement. "No. I woke up like this. I think… I think we should probably go to the hospital now."

"We'll go right now," he promised, "We'll get you a transfusion and you'll feel better. Marty, can you—shit!"

He didn't get a chance to finish telling Marty to get the girls to the gym, because Payson suddenly slumped over in his arms, unconscious. He caught her before she fell and lowered her to the ground, then looked up at his colleagues and started giving frantic orders.

"Kevin, call down to Emergency Services and arrange transport for her to Royal London. And tell them to get the blood ready to start a transfusion in the ambulance. They should have a supply specifically for her. Peter, call this number," he pulled a card from his wallet, "and tell them that we're bringing Payson Keeler to the A&E at Royal and we need Dr. Clarke to meet us there. And Marty, go get Austin, and call her mother. Let her know where we're going so she can meet us there."

"Payson, love," he said, stroking her cheeks, trying to get her to respond, "You need to wake up. You're scaring me again, and I told you to stop doing that. Wake up, love. Let me see those pretty green eyes."

His pleading was interrupted when Austin came barreling into the room, still in his pajamas, and slid to a stop beside them. He was quickly followed by Marty, but the other coaches stayed in the hallway to control the chaos that had erupted as athletes realized someone was down.

"What happened?"

The paramedics got there before he could answer Austin's question, so he explained it to them all at once. They moved her onto a stretcher and the paramedic asked, "Is there anything in particular I need to know about her? Allergies, pre-existing conditions?"

"No allergies," he answered, standing with her as they lifted the stretcher off the ground, "but she has iron deficiency anemia and eryptosis. Her hematocrit was twenty seven percent when they tested it on Wednesday, she got four units of packed red blood cells last Friday, and she's about nine weeks pregnant."

He noticed a blur of several things as he followed her stretcher through the building: Marty's shocked expression; his girls crying; athletes standing in their doorways watching as she was wheeled by; someone taking pictures when they loaded her into the ambulance. Then he and Austin were climbing in beside her and the doors were closing behind them. And then they were moving.

* * *

><p>AN: Okay, so it's kind of short and a cliffhanger, but the next chapter is nice and long and answers lots of questions. Plus there will be a lot of great Sasha/Payson moments and Austin/Payson moments.

A&E is the British way of saying ER if you were wondering. It stands for accident and emergency.

I don't have a clever way to ask you to review here, so I'm just going to ask all normal like. Review, please :)


	27. Chapter 27

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

A/N: Woops. I left ya'll on a cliff hanger and then forgot to post. Sorry!

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><p>"Sasha?"<p>

It was the first thing that Payson had said since she lost consciousness over ten minutes ago, and even though it was Sasha's name instead of his, Austin thought he had never heard a sweeter sound in his life. Those ten minutes of silence felt like years.

Sasha was by her side in an instant. "I'm here, love, and so is Austin. We're on our way to the hospital. What's the last thing you remember?"

"Talking to you… about the papers… and not feeling well." Her response was weak and spread out, like she couldn't manage more than a few words at a time. He'd never seen her like this before. She'd been worn out the past few days, and he'd seen her in the hospital last time she passed out, but that was nothing like this. She'd already had IV fluids pumping through her for over an hour by the time he got to the hospital in Boulder, but this must be what she looked like when Kim and Sasha first took her to the ER. It was terrifying.

Sasha swept her hair back from her face and let his hand linger against her cheek, stroking his thumb lightly across her skin like it was a completely normal thing to do. "I think 'not feeling well' is an understatement, love. You've been out cold for a while. They had to get some blood going in you before you could even wake up."

"Alex?" she asked.

Austin looked to the EMT riding with them in the back, the one who had just finished adjusting the settings for her transfusion. "The baby? Can we tell if he's alright?"

The young man nodded and pulled a largish machine out from beneath its cover. "These portable machines aren't the best, but we can at least visualize the fetus and look for a heartbeat. May I?" he asked her, gesturing to her midriff.

Payson chuckled low under her breath and nodded. "I'm not shy…" she said. "They've both seen me… in a whole lot less."

He lifted up her shirt and unbuckled her shorts, and Austin found himself wondering exactly how much _less_ Sasha had seen her in, but his thought got cut off when an image came onto the small screen. The man was moving some sort of stick over Payson's belly, now covered with gel, and a grainy picture of his child was showing on the machine. It wasn't nearly as clear as the last couple of pictures Pay had shown him, but he was definitely there, looking like a little person just like Payson said he did.

"There's the baby," the medic said, and Payson just nodded. She probably knew what she was seeing better than the tech did. "And the heart rate is registering at 172 beat per minute."

If Austin had to guess, he would say that the young man had no idea if that was good or bad, but Payson assured them all that it was normal. The vice around his heart unclenched a little at hearing that Alex's heart was beating normally, but he couldn't relax yet. They wouldn't know for sure if he was okay until a real doctor checked him out, and even if _he_ was okay, Payson obviously wasn't.

The original thought on her condition was that the stress placed on her body by the pregnancy, training, and her morning sickness had combined to cause an abnormal reaction that would be easily solvable by supplements and a modified schedule. After a close examination of her blood work, her blood doctor decided that the pregnancy probably just sped up a process which had already begun in her body rather than causing it, but there was still no reason to believe that she wouldn't get better. Now Austin was starting to doubt her recovery. From what he'd seen, she was only getting worse.

Sasha was wiping the gel off of Payson's stomach with a towel while the EMT put away the machine, and Austin was again struck with the level of comfort that existed between the two of them. Sasha's hands were touching areas of her skin that were too low for anyone but Austin to be touching, and Payson didn't seem to mind at all. In fact, she didn't even notice.

She said his name and he crouched beside her so that she didn't need to talk over the sirens. "You shouldn't be here… You have to go… back to the Village."

He was stunned. She didn't want him there? He thought they had moved past this into a somewhat healthy relationship, even if it was only as friends and cooperative parents… who happened to sleep together.

"You have… qualifying today… You have to compete."

He breathed a sigh of relief at her reasoning. It wasn't that she didn't want him there; it was just that she didn't want him to miss out on the Olympics. But still… she must know that she and the baby were more important than a stupid competition. "I'm not leaving you, Payson. Screw competing."

She could barely keep her eyes open, but somehow she managed to glare at him. "You already missed… the Opening Ceremony… for me… You're not… giving up Qualifying… for me, too."

She wasn't well enough to go to the Opening Ceremony the night before, where they would be surrounded by crowds and noise and she would be forced to stand for hours on end. He lied to her and said that the Ceremonies were lame anyway and he hadn't planned on going, but she knew that he was staying in the Village just for her. Sasha probably would have stayed, too, had it been an option.

"I don't care about Qualifying, Pay. I care about you and about Alex. I don't need another gold medal, but I do need you to be okay, so I'm not leaving until I know that's going to happen."

"Austin, please," she pleaded, her voice wavering with exhaustion. "I feel bad enough… that I'm messing up… my team… but I don't want… to be responsible… for the men losing, too."

It was the only thing she could possibly have said to make him consider competing. He didn't want his team to suffer because he wasn't there, but his reservation lasted only long enough to watch her eyes flutter shut. "No way, Pay. That's not important. This is."

Once again, Austin watched as Sasha and Payson communicated without words. With a single glance they seemed to have an entire conversation, and then Sasha turned to him and said, "You have to go, Austin. Don't put that kind of guilt on her; don't make her live with that. I'll keep you up to date on everything that happens, but you remember what it was like last time. We sat around for hours while Payson slept. You can't help her by just being there, but you can help your team."

"Fine, I'll compromise," he said, unable to argue with their logic and really not wanting Payson to feel guilty. "We compete at three thirty. I'll stay with you until ten and then leave."

"Nine."

"Ten."

"Nine." Damn, for a person who was too sick to support her own head, she could be really freaking stubborn. "Everything important… happens in the first hour… anyway. Please, Austin."

He caved. He never could say no to her. "Fine, but I want updates at least once an hour."

He was looking at Sasha when he said it, knowing that he would be the one making the calls. The older man nodded and said, "You're not taking your phone out on the floor, though. I'll call Kevin and let him pass the word onto you."

They both looked back at Payson and her eyes were closed. For a brief, panic-filled moment Austin thought she had passed out again, but she was just asleep. She woke up briefly when they reached the hospital, just long enough to call Sasha's name and twitch her hand for him to hold, and then she was asleep again. She didn't even notice when a nurse checked her over and drew blood. It made him nervous for her to be so deeply asleep, but her chest was rising in slow, deep breaths and color was returning to her skin; he hoped that meant she was regaining some of her strength.

They didn't admit her to the ward this time. They left her in a cubicle in the ER, which Austin took to be a good sign. It meant that they didn't anticipate her being there for long. A nurse informed them that the doctor was on his way and would meet with them shortly and until then they would continue the transfusion. Shortly after the nurse left, Kim arrived; he was surprised to see her alone.

Sasha filled her in on what was happening and then stepped outside of the cubicle to have a whispered conversation with a nurse. Austin let his curiosity get the best of him and asked where Payson's dad was.

"I had to leave him at the hotel to look after Becca," she explained. "I didn't want to leave her with one of the other gym parents when she was so upset, but I didn't want her to come here, either. She shouldn't have to see Payson like this."

"It's just as well," Sasha said, stepping back around the curtain. "A&E patients are only allowed two visitors. I've talked the nurse into letting the three of us stay, but we would never have been able to swing four people."

He walked to Payson and stroked one hand against her cheek while he ran the other one through her loose hair. "Time to wake up, love. Your mum's here and the doctor will be any minute." Austin wondered if he even realized he was calling her 'love.' The endearment was new for them, at least as far as Austin knew, but he'd used it several times since they left the Village.

Her eyes fluttered open and she said, "Hey." He thought that was a weird thing to say when waking up in the hospital, but he didn't particularly care since her voice sounded so much stronger. She was getting better with every ounce of blood they pumped into her.

"Your mum's here," Sasha repeated, and Payson turned her head to look for her. Kim rushed to her side and took her hand; Payson said, "The baby's okay."

He'd realized something in the ambulance. Payson honestly didn't care about her own health anymore, except in how it affected their child. She was scared, yes, but she was willing to accept whatever the outcome was for her as long as she could carry Alex to term. Austin wasn't there yet. He was anxious for his son's health, but he wasn't willing to sacrifice Payson, either.

Sasha wasn't exaggerating when he said that the doctor would be there any minute. Kim and Payson had barely exchanged greetings when a tall, lanky man with blonde hair and a white coat arrived. He introduced himself as Dr. Clarke, the hematologist recommended by Dr. Owen.

"I was planning to order a transfusion for you today, Ms. Keeler, but I see you've beat me to it." He was relaxed and cheerful, and the tension in the room abated a little with his easy manner. "I spoke with Dr. Owen yesterday and we agreed that you should receive blood transfusions as a prophylactic until your body can produce enough new red blood cells to support you. Standard protocol dictates that transfusions not be given until the hematocrit levels drop below twenty-five percent, but I think today has shown that waiting is not the best option for you."

Payson just nodded, not bothering to ask any questions. Austin wondered if it was because she was too weak or if she didn't want to know the answers. Kim was more than willing to ask on her behalf. "Do you know what's wrong with her?"

"We think we do, yes. Dr. Owen has studied Payson's blood samples very carefully and he discovered an abnormality in the structure of her red blood cells. It is genetic." He turned to Payson again and explained, "Your cells are formed in a way that makes them unstable. Therefore, they die much more quickly than they should. This has been happening your entire life, but because you are young and healthy your body was able to compensate by producing a higher number of red blood cells. It was inevitable that the rate of destruction would overcome the rate of construction."

Payson frowned. "Did getting pregnant cause this? Is that what made my body stop compensating?"

"In a way, yes," he said, bobbing his head to the side in a gesture that indicated the dubious nature of the connection. "The pregnancy caused normal anemia, which allowed your body the chance to slip into the disorder. But this reaction could have been triggered by any number of insignificant events—a heavy period, a change in your diet, the flu. This could not have been prevented without previous knowledge of the abnormality."

"So what do we do?" Kim asked. "Just keep giving her blood transfusions?"

"No, the transfusions are a temporary measure. They are dangerous when given repeatedly. We're going to start you on a drug to stimulate the production of red blood cells so that the transfusions won't be necessary anymore."

Payson studied the doctor's face critically. "You're talking about an ESA, right?" ESA's were a banned substance. She was already using one banned substance, blood. "What happens if I don't take it?"

"Your red blood cells will continue to die at an ever-increasing rate," the doctor replied, his face grave.

Payson finished the sentence for him. "And if my red blood cells die, then so do I." He nodded and the room went cold. It was their worst nightmare. Her face hardened and she said, "Do it."

Sasha reached out to take her hand. "Payson," he said, "Do you still want to compete?" If her life was on the line, they all wanted her to reach her dreams first.

"Is that even an option?" she asked, looking toward the doctor. "Would I even be capable of competing tomorrow?"

"You would be able to answer that question better than I could. You will be at the same level that you were after your last transfusion. Is that enough to compete?" Dr. Clarke hadn't shown any indication that he knew who Payson was outside of the medical realm, but there was something in his eyes that made Austin believe he knew exactly who his patient was, and he was a fan.

She looked at Sasha as she answered, "Yes." Austin breathed a sigh of relief. Payson had been dreaming about the Olympics since she was five; he didn't want her to miss it.

Sasha nodded once, acting strong for her. "I'll go call Emilie Morel and see what we can do about the ESA."

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><p>AN: So, Payson getting sick was not in the original plan for this story, but when I realized where the story was taking me I had to do about 3 days of research to figure out exactly what was wrong with her. This is all possible. Not _likely_, per se, but definitely possible.

So do you think the IOC will let her compete? What do you think will happen next? Review and let me know your guesses!

p.s. I'm working on Starcrossed right now, so expect that later tonight.


	28. Chapter 28

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

A/N: This is a fairly long chapter because it was either going to be really short or kind of long, and I went with the longer way :)

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><p>Considering the circumstances, they should have been falling apart on the practice floor, but they weren't. If fact, they were the best they'd ever been. Emily didn't even need to give a pep-talk to remind them to keep their heads in the game, because they were all thinking the exact same thing. They had to win gold, for Payson.<p>

Lauren glared at Marcus McGowan when he called them together for a meeting. That man was a slime ball. Ellen Beals was evil, but at least she was upfront about it. Marcus pretended like he was on their side so he could further along his own agenda, but he would just as easily kick them to the curb if he thought they were no longer helpful to him.

"Andrea," he said, once they were all gathered, "We need you to compete tomorrow. You'll do uneven bars and balance beam. Emily, you will add a vault rotation and Lauren, floor."

Lauren's heart stopped beating. If Andrea was in, that meant Payson was out. "What happened to Payson?" she asked. "Did they tell her she was too sick to compete?"

"Uh, no," he admitted, pulling on his ear. He had a horrible poker face. "We haven't heard anything about Payson's condition yet. But after the negative press from the drug test leak and what happened this morning, we have decided that it would be best for the team if Andrea competed in her place."

"No."

They all turned to look at Andy in shock. Marcus's mouth was hanging open. "Excuse me?" he asked.

"No. I won't compete as long as Payson is able to. If her doctors won't allow her to compete, I'll step up, but I won't take her place just because you are too chicken to put her in. She's better sick than the rest of us are healthy. She deserves to compete." Nobody turned down the chance to compete at the Olympics. It was preposterous. And _awesome_. Lauren had never given much thought to Andy, but now she was looking at her with new respect. She had some serious balls.

"Fine," snapped Marcus. "If you want to turn down the opportunity of a lifetime, be my guest. Beth, Andrea has just done you a favor. You're competing now."

The look Beth gave him was scathing. "If you think I'm going to take her place, you're seriously nuts. I am not going to take advantage of my friend's misfortune. Payson would never do that to us. If you don't trust her to pull her weight, you can compete with a four man team."

Lauren made a quick decision. "Three."

The group turned to her with the same expressions they had just given Andrea. Marcus seemed to have lost the ability to close his mouth. "What?" he asked.

"If Payson doesn't compete, I won't either. You've got a three man team."

Emily squared her shoulders. "Two."

"One," chimed Kaylie.

They all looked at Kelly, who was standing with her arms crossed over her chest. She jutted out her chin but deflated under the force of their gaze. "Fine, zero. Either let Payson compete or Team USA forfeits."

The National Team Coordinator didn't say anything in response. He glared at them all and walked away, not bothering to acknowledge their protest. Kelly turned to them all and said, "You know, this might be a moot point. She might not be well enough to compete anyway."

"Well then," Lauren shrugged. "At least we got to piss of the NGO. I love doing that."

Kelly ceded the point and they all went back to practice, agreeing to act under the assumption that Payson would be competing until they heard any news. They didn't stop working until Austin walked in about an hour later, still in the pajamas he was wearing when they left with Payson early that morning. They ran to his side as a group.

Emily stepped closer and hugged him, long and hard, giving him the support that he needed. Austin was one of her closest friends. He clung to her like a lifeline. His face was haggard; it looked like he'd aged ten years in the last two and a half hours, and his eyes were bloodshot like he'd been crying.

"How is she?" Emily asked, pulling out of the hug.

"Better. She's awake and talking, and they think she can compete tomorrow, if the IOC lets her. They figured out what's wrong with her, so they should be able to treat it now."

"What is it?" Lauren asked, scared of what the answer might be.

"Pretty much what we knew before, that her blood is breaking down, but they found out it's been doing that her whole life. She just isn't making enough new blood to replace it anymore and it spiraled out of control. They're giving her an ESA to help her get more blood of her own instead of having to do transfusions."

That explained what he meant about the IOC letting her compete. She was already involved in a scandal over blood doping, although the pictures of her being loaded onto an ambulance that were now circulating did a lot to dispel that rumor, but would they let her compete while using yet another banned substance?

There was more going on than what he was saying, though, Lauren could tell. Emily was the one to call him on it. "What aren't you telling us, Austin? I know you're holding something back."

He choked back tears, which scared the hell out of her, and answered, "The eryptosis, the red blood cells killing themselves, it builds on itself. The more cells die, the faster it happens, so if the medicine doesn't work…"

"Oh my God." Kaylie stepped away from him as if she could distance herself from the truth. "Tell me you're not saying what I think you're saying. _Please_, tell me I'm misunderstanding."

Austin set his jaw. "The medicine will work. The doctor said the medicine will work." He sounded like he was trying to convince himself as much as them. "It's not even permanent. He said that she only has to do it for a few months to get her body back on track and then she'll be fine. We _have_ to believe that she'll be fine."

The men's team coach, Kevin, walked over to them, probably seeing that the situation was about to escalate out of control. Much like Sasha, he had the ability to avert a potential explosion. "Austin," he said, laying his hand on the gymnast's shoulder, "The way I understand it, Payson wanted you back here to train. The best thing you can do for her right now is honor that request. I brought your gym bag with me, so go change and get to work. We only have a few more hours before we have to pack up and get to the arena."

Austin nodded and left, and Kevin turned to the six girls still surrounding him. "Don't let Austin scare you too much, girls. He's upset and scared himself, but Sasha assures me that the doctor said Payson would be okay. He's keeping Austin up to date through me, so I'll be sure to pass on the information to you as well. Like I told Austin, the best thing you can do for her right now is train. I know she wants you all on that gold medal podium."

"He's right," Emily said, stepping into her role as team captain. "Payson would want us to keep working. Let's go."

o-O-o

"I want to see Austin first."

Payson Keeler was one of the most stubborn women he had ever met. They'd been in the hospital for nearly eight hours and she was being released with strict instructions to rest, but she insisted that they go to the North Greenwich Arena before heading back to the Village.

"_No_, Payson. You are not leaving the hospital and going to an arena filled with twenty thousand people. You're the most famous gymnast in the world, you can't just walk in unnoticed. You'll be swamped within thirty seconds of walking in the door. That is _not_ resting."

"I'm not an idiot, Sasha," she said, stomping her foot. She could act rather childish when she was angry. "I wasn't planning to walk through the front door. We'll use the tunnel entrance and go straight to Austin. Nobody will even know I'm there."

"Sweetie, the doctor said you need to rest," Kim said, trying to reason with her. "You need to go lie down. Why are you so adamant about this?"

Payson scowled. "Because I know Austin. His head is all over the place and he's not going to compete well. Last time he was distracted over me he nearly broke his neck falling off the high bar. He needs to _see_ me to know that I'm okay."

"Payson…"

"No, Sasha. You're not talking me out of this. Everything is so screwed up, and I don't want another thing added to that list right now. I don't want Austin to lose because of me." Her voice was tight and there were tears in her eyes, which was what made him give in. She had cried enough lately; he didn't want to make her do it again.

He pulled his cell phone out of his pocket and said, "Fine. I'll call Kevin and let him know we're on our way."

It was a short drive from the hospital to the arena, less than fifteen minutes, and when they arrived the men were still in the locker room, minutes away from entering the arena. The timing was perfect.

Kevin answered their knock and opened the door wide for them to come in. The five men, all occupied with last minute preparations, looked up when they stepped inside. Austin was across the room in half a second, not even realizing that a roll of tape was dangling from his half-wrapped wrist as he swept Payson into his arms. For a long moment they stood holding each other, not bothering to speak. Austin finally broke the silence. "Thank God you're okay," he said, tilting her face up for a kiss.

It wasn't long and it wasn't passionate, but it felt too intimate to be watching nonetheless. Sasha found himself wondering exactly how fake their relationship was. He had conflicted feelings about that. On the one hand, a real relationship would certainly be healthier than the purely sexual relationship they had been engaging in, but on the other hand, he knew they would never survive as a long term relationship, and he didn't want to see her get hurt again.

His musings turned to curiosity when he noticed both Max Spencer and Nicky Russo watching the couple with sour looks on their faces. He knew that Payson had been involved with Max, but did she have a history with Nicky Russo, too? For a woman who didn't like complications, she sure had a lot of them.

Austin and Payson were having a whispered conversation, none of which Sasha could hear, but it didn't last long. The men were called to line up, so Payson quickly finished wrapping his wrist for him, pecked him on the lips, and wished him luck. She watched them file out of the room, and when the door swung shut behind the last athlete, she surprised Sasha by sinking into his arms.

She mumbled into his shirt, which he had learned to understand after much practice. "I wish I could stay and watch."

"We'll go back and watch it on the television, love. Austin understands why you can't be here," he promised, dropping a kiss to the top of her head.

She shifted so that she was looking up at him with her cheek resting over his heart. "Can I see the girls before we leave? We don't have to go up to the stands, they could come down here."

"You're pushing it, Pay. I agreed to let you see _Austin_, and only because he was about to compete. You can wait to see the girls until they get back to the Village."

"Please," she begged, pressing tighter against him. "You know they're worried about me. It's not fair to make them worry for another three hours, especially when I'm already here."

Damnit, she was hard to say no to. He'd never fully understood the expression 'puppy dog eyes' until then, and he knew he was licked. "Five minutes, that's all you get. And you're going to sit down the whole time."

"Thank you, Sasha." She pressed a kiss against his jaw, being too short to reach his cheek, and then pulled away to sit on one of the benches. He called Marty and asked him to bring the women's team down from their place in the stands, then spent the brief wait watching Payson. He was trying to gauge how she felt, to see if she really was well enough to compete. Her coloring was better and she was sitting upright with no support, which boded well for her health, but she was staring off into space. That was a very un-Payson-like thing to do, so he didn't feel confident that she was fully recovered from her exhaustion.

When the girls filed in a few minutes later, Payson perked up considerably. Sometimes Sasha forgot how close the bond between their team really was; seeing them together, he knew that Payson was right. They need to see her and she needed to see them. One at a time, her teammates came to hug her, being overly cautious because they were scared. Payson rolled her eyes and said, "You're not going to break me, guys. I think that if I can do gymnastics then I'm probably allowed to hug, too."

"So you can compete? You're well enough?" Lauren asked, stepping away from Payson's embrace.

Payson pursed her lips and nodded. "Depending on how I feel tomorrow, yes. Judging by how I felt after the last transfusion, I think I'll be able to."

"What about your drug test?" Kaylie asked. "Austin said you had to start on an ESA, and they still haven't passed through your first TUE either, right?"

Payson snorted in amusement. "They approved the one for the transfusions today and guaranteed an approval for the Aranesp. MJ went all evil genius on the IOC and threatened to go to the media if they tried to make choose between competing or living."

The rest of the team rolled past the tacit admission of the life or death nature of her illness. Austin had probably already informed them of the stakes and they were trying not to make Payson uncomfortable by talking about it. Kelly flipped her hair and casually stated, "Well, I'm glad they're letting you compete. I, for one, was not looking forward to forfeiting."

"What are you talking about?" Payson asked, her eyebrows knit together in confusion. "Why would you need to forfeit?"

"You haven't talked to Marcus yet?"

Sasha was the one to answer Emily's question. "No, we haven't. We spent most of the day negotiating with the IOC. I left a message for him earlier but I haven't heard back. Is there something we should know about?"

"Yeah, Andrea earned the award for most awesome person ever," Lauren said, beaming at the alternate, "by staging a coup. The NGO wanted to bench you, Pay, but she refused to compete."

Payson blinked in surprise. "Wow, Andy, I'm completely honored that you would do that for me. But how does that equal to you guys forfeiting?"

Kelly sat down on the bench beside Payson. "After Andy started it, everyone else stepped down. We all agreed that if you didn't compete we weren't going to either."

"_You_ weren't going to compete? Am I actually still in the hospital and having hallucinations?"

"Ha, ha," Kelly said, nudging Payson's shoulder with her own. "I told you the other day, I don't want to win just because you can't compete. It's not really winning if I don't beat you."

Sasha was so proud of his gymnasts, but this had gone on long enough. Payson needed to rest. "Okay, girls, I'm sorry to break this up, but Payson needs to get back and rest if she wants to compete tomorrow. I want you to know how incredibly proud I am of all of you, though. What you did for Payson was incredibly selfless, and I am honored to be the coach of such an amazing team."

They all hugged Payson again and then hugged him as well. Before Andrea stepped out of the locker room, he held his hand out to stop her. "Lauren was right," he said, "You definitely win the award for most awesome person ever."

Before Marty left to accompany the team back to the stands, he stopped and clapped his hand on Sasha's shoulder in a gesture that looked like camaraderie. In reality, he was squeezing hard enough to leave a bruise. "When I get back," he whispered, "You and I are going to have a long chat."

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><p>AN: So this chapter we get some hints of the relationship that they had before she got pregnant. They know each other fairly well because they _were_ friends before the shit hit the fan, she just never realized that he wanted to be more than friends :) There is also a little hint as to where their relationship is headed now.

Where is the review love?


	29. Chapter 29

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

A/N: I keep losing track of my posting schedule. Is this the right day?

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><p>The competition was nearly over and Marty still hadn't managed to stop fidgeting. Either his knee was bouncing or his fingers were drumming against his thigh or he was shifting around in his seat. He was always moving in some way, and he knew exactly why. He couldn't sit still because the North Greenwich Arena was not where he wanted to be. He wanted to be back at the Village laying into Sasha for lying to him.<p>

He gave up. It would be better to have this conversation while the rest of the gymnastics community was preoccupied. If he left immediately he might be able to finish his fight with Sasha before everyone got back. Or, if the conversation didn't go well, he might have time to hide the body.

He gave Emily instructions to get the team back after the competition and left. He was confident in Emily's responsibility and athlete transportation was well taken care of at these Games, so he wasn't a necessary chaperone. He caught a car back to the Village, and at some point during the ride Marty developed a facial twitch. He'd probably have a heart attack before all was said and done.

He was pissed, but when he got back to the apartment he shared with the other coaches, he became suspicious as well. There was something very wrong with the picture he encountered upon walking into his living room.

Sasha and Payson were both on the couch watching the men's qualifying, but they weren't just sitting together. No, they were—heaven help him for using this word—_cuddling_. Sasha was reclining into the corner of the couch with one arm around Payson's shoulder and the other reaching across their bodies to rest on her hip; if he moved his hand a few more inches the word 'hip' could easily be replaced with 'ass.' Payson's position was no better. Both her arms were wrapped around his torso and her chest was pressed against his, with her head resting in the hollow between his shoulder and neck. Her body was twisted so that she was practically lying on top of him while still watching the TV and, worst of all, her outside leg was thrown across both their bodies to rest between Sasha's thighs, with their calves linked together below. Suddenly Marty wondered if all of those rumors about the two of them were true.

"Sasha," he barked, "We need to talk." He pointed back toward the room they were sharing and waited for his fellow coach to disentangle himself from Payson and follow. Before he rose, she whispered something and kissed him. Sasha's returning kiss to the top of her head seemed relatively innocent, but there was nothing innocent about the way she had kissed him. It was no quick peck on the cheek. For one, it was in the wrong place. She was kissing right below his jawline, a little too close to his neck to be appropriate, and it was a little too lingering and too open-mouthed to be considered platonic.

Sasha passed him into their bedroom and Marty closed the door behind them. His first instinct was to punch his sometimes-friend/sometimes-rival right in the mouth, but his self-preservation instincts were too strong for that. He'd had more than a few fist fights with Sasha over the years, and he always came out the worse for it. Damn Nicolai for teaching Sasha how to box.

"I think you owe me a few explanations here, Sasha."

Sasha shut down, his face becoming a blank mask. "I told you before, it's none of your concern. You knew she was sick, and that was all you needed to know."

"No, that was not all I needed to know," he said, invading Sasha's personal space. "You left out a couple of major facts that, as one of her coaches, I should have been aware of. I shouldn't have found out that she popped positive for doping by reading it in the newspaper, and I definitely shouldn't have found out that she was pregnant while a paramedic was putting her on a stretcher. She shouldn't even be competing."

"Which, aside from the fact that _it's none of your business_, is one of the reasons we didn't tell you. I knew that you wouldn't want her competing if you found out she was pregnant, and that isn't your decision to make. She's not taking this lightly, Marty. She's been under medical supervision the whole time and she wouldn't be competing if the doctor hadn't assured her that it was safe."

"Safe?" Marty said, nearly choking on the word, "You think this is safe? She passed out in our living room this morning."

"That had nothing to do with the pregnancy," Sasha ground between his teeth. "It's a genetic condition. The obstetricians in Boulder and here both told her that doing gymnastics would not harm the baby, and the only thing about the blood condition that could prevent her from competing is weakness. The transfusion took care of that and they know now how to prevent it from happening again. She can compete."

A question slipped out of his mouth before he could stop it. "Are you the father?"

Sasha stared at him, struck silent by either the non-sequitur or genuine surprise at the question. Marty was hoping for genuine surprise, because that would mean the answer was no. "What?"

"I don't think there are many ways to misinterpret that question, Sasha," he said, the words somehow coming off as more threatening than sarcastic. "Are you the father of Payson's baby?"

Sasha glowered. "You know, I'm getting really tired of people assuming that I'm taking advantage of a seventeen year old girl. Why the hell would you think I am the father?"

"Oh, I don't know, maybe because she was just plastered to you. Or the fact that your hand was on her ass. Or maybe I got suspicious when she just sucked on your neck." Okay, he was exaggerating a bit. But not by much, and their position a few minutes ago was enough to make anybody start questioning their relationship. "But the thing that really got me wondering was that you both looked a little too relaxed like that for this to be a new development. What is going on between you two?"

"_Comfort_, that's what's going on. She's upset and scared. My hand was not on her ass nor did she in any way _suck_ on my neck. Just because your mind is permanently in the gutter does not mean that the rest of us have to walk on eggshells." Marty took umbrage at the description of his mindset, but he didn't have time to protest because Sasha was still speaking. "You coached Payson for five years, you know that she's a very physical person. That's what calms her down."

What was this drivel? Payson wasn't a physical person, she was a 'leave me the hell alone and I'll fix it myself' kind of person. He said as much to Sasha.

Sasha looked at him like he was a slug. "No wonder you couldn't help these girls," he said. "You don't know them at all."

"Really? You're trying to turn this back on me?"

"Yeah, I am," he said, taking a step closer. Marty swayed backward. "You're criticizing me for the way that I coach Payson, but maybe you should be taking a closer look at yourself. You worked with those girls for years, but did you ever see them as anything other than gymnasts? Did you know anything about who they were as a person? I could write the biographies of all four of them, but you didn't even know that Payson likes to be hugged when she's upset. So you tell me, Marty, am I really the one who should be on trial here?"

Marty didn't know what to say. He didn't agree with Sasha, not by a long shot, but they could argue until they were blue in the face and not agree with each other's coaching styles. He settled for blind, petty accusation. "Well at least the Payson that _I_ coached would never have gotten pregnant. Maybe they would have been better off if you hadn't got quite so involved in their personal lives."

"Yes," Sasha scoffed, "I'm sure they would be much better off if you were still coaching them. Lauren would still be lashing out, Kaylie would be doing childish routines and chasing after boys, Emily would have no discipline, and Payson wouldn't be doing gymnastics at all. _That_'s the life they should have led."

"This is ridiculous, Sasha. We're _both_ being ridiculous. Just tell me the truth. The _whole_ truth."

Sasha deflated, letting go of all his righteous indignation with a sigh, and said, "Fine, but you might want to sit down. It's a long story, and if you interrupt me I'll punch you."

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><p>AN: So Marty thinks that Sasha is too involved with his gymnasts and Sasha thinks that Marty isn't involved enough. That was fun :)

Oh, and also… REVIEW! And answer my question of the day while you're at it: does Marty stand a chance against Sasha in a fight or would Sasha beat the crap out of him? Wha'da'ya think?


	30. Chapter 30

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

A/N: If you've never had a migraine, be thankful. I just had one that lasted half a week. Blah.

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><p>Kevin couldn't be happier with how his men had done in the first day of competition. They were first going into finals, and only one major competitor was still to compete in the third round of qualifying. Austin and Nicky looked strong for the All Around and, barring any surprises in the last qualifying set, they would have at least one man in every event final. It was shaping up to be a good Olympics for the U.S. men.<p>

He had been worried about Austin's ability to perform. The kid's head wasn't in the game all morning, or really in the past several days. All of his attention was focused on Payson Keeler, and Kevin thought for a while that he would blow off qualifying to be with his girlfriend in the hospital. He wasn't wrong, either. From what Sasha said, it seemed that the only reason he left the hospital was because Payson made him.

Judging by the way he performed in the morning, Austin wouldn't even have qualified for the All Around, much less be seeded first, if Payson hadn't come to see him in the locker room. Whatever she said to him in those brief whispered moments had worked wonders, and Austin went out and had one of the best days of competition that he'd ever had. Kevin never thought he'd see the day that Austin Tucker was whipped, but he was wrapped around the finger of one five-foot-four little fireball. If she told him to win, then, by God, he was going to win.

He was planning to celebrate the day's success by having a few beers with his assistant coach, Peter, and maybe Sasha and Marty if he could talk them into it. The two trampoline coaches didn't associate much with the rest of them, so he wouldn't even bother to ask if they wanted to join. They probably wouldn't even be in the apartment. He wasn't sure where they spent all of their time and he didn't bother himself to find out.

His plans went out the window, or at the very least got delayed, when he opened the door to his apartment and found Austin's very own fireball lying on the couch and watching what appeared to be a girl making fun of the vault. It was surprising enough to find her in his living room, but what was more surprising was that she seemed to be there alone.

She lifted her head from the armrest when he and Peter entered the room and smiled at them. He could see why Austin was so hung up on this girl. She was gorgeous. "Congratulations," she said. "The team was amazing today."

He couldn't help but smile back. She was right, they were amazing. "Thanks, little one, I'm pretty proud of them myself. I thought you'd be back in your place waiting for Austin, though. What are you doing here?"

"I'm not allowed to be alone," she said, rolling her eyes. "Sasha has to supervise me for the next twenty-four hours to make sure I don't have a seizure or a stroke from the ESA they just started me on."

"You're on an ESA?" he asked with a frown. Not only were they banned, they were also rarely prescribed. If they were giving her an ESA, she was really sick.

She nodded her head toward the paper on the table. "Well, I figured since the whole world thinks I'm doping anyway, I might as well go all the way with it."

He chuckled. It was another reason that Austin was so crazy about her. She had a great sense of humor, even in the worst of circumstances. "Well where is your chaperone now?" he asked.

"In the bedroom fighting with Marty. The yelling stopped a little while ago, so Sasha either agreed to give him the details about my health problems or one of them committed homicide. It's a toss-up either way."

"Marty didn't know?" he asked, sitting beside her on the couch. She threw a glance in Peter's direction and he took the hint. She wasn't comfortable talking about this in front of strangers, and if Kevin hadn't been in contact with Sasha all day long, she probably wouldn't have talked to him either.

She waited until Peter was out of the room before she answered. "No. Nobody knew except for Austin and Sasha, and my family obviously. The girls don't even know the full extent of it."

"It's that bad?"

"It's worse." She turned the full force of her eyes on him, and he thought he might drown in their depth. "It's not just my life on the line."

He was overwhelmed by confusion; it took him a long time to process the words and even longer to process their meaning. "You're pregnant?"

She tore her eyes away from his and laid her head back down on the armrest. "Nobody knows," she said. "I just wanted you to know that Austin's not a complete basket case. He has a real reason to be freaking out. If I die then so does our son."

"Your secret's safe with me," he promised, reaching out to squeeze her hand. "I never thought that Austin was a basket case, anyway. It's easy to see how much he cares about you, and it's okay for him to be scared, baby or no baby. Nobody is judging him."

Her returning smile was more of a grimace. He was saved the trouble of finding something to say by a deep British voice coming from behind them. "I should have known."

She turned to look at him and her smile was real this time. "You really should have," she said. "Especially since you didn't pull through and get it for me like last time I was in the hospital."

"You were in the A&E, love. There wasn't a television."

"Excuses, excuses," she said as she turned around to face forward again. Kevin didn't understand their banter.

Sasha came to stand in front of them, blocking the TV. Payson gave a fake pout and crossed her arms. "Is Marty still alive?" she asked, "Or should I be calling the cops?"

Sasha and Kevin both chuckled. She had an amazing ability to joke during rough situations. Sasha answered, "He's still alive. I think he might be catatonic, though."

"That bad?"

He shrugged and tilted his head. "Give him time. It'll sink in eventually. We should get back to your flat, though. I'm sure the girls want to see you and Austin has already sent me nine text messages asking where you are. Besides, I doubt Kevin wants to watch Stick It."

"He should, it's awesome," she said, sticking out her tongue. It was strange to watch this mature young woman, dealing with a life-threatening illness and impending motherhood, morph into a silly, teasing child again. It was also strange that the person who made her relax and drop her guard was Sasha. Sasha was a hard ass and always had been, but Payson brought out another side of him. Coming to the Rock was probably the best thing that ever happened to that man.

Sasha took her hands and hauled her up from the couch, and she continued her forward momentum to lean against him and wrap her arms around his waist. The level of comfort between them was astounding. It reminded Kevin of the relationship that he shared with his former coach, except that instead of a hug he was usually looking for a shared night of drinking. Payson propped her chin on his shoulder and asked, "Can I just go to sleep and not wake up until it's time to compete?"

"Not quite," Sasha chuckled, "but pretty close. As soon as you eat you can go to sleep, and I won't wake you until right before we need to leave for the training center. That'll give you nearly twelve hours to recuperate."

She was nodding off against his chest, so Sasha swept her up to carry her back to her apartment. He said to Kevin, "I have to stay with her tonight, so I won't be back until the morning. Congratulations, though, on how well your men did today."

"Thanks, and I wish the same for your girls tomorrow." He reached out and laid his hand on Payson's shoulder. "Feel better soon, little one. I'm sure you'll do wonderful tomorrow."

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><p>AN: Hmm… looks like Payson is getting kind of tired of keeping this secret :)

So the finale… did anyone else think it was kind of lame? Especially since they kept touting it as being "epic." And is it just me or did Payson's new floor kind of suck? I'm erasing a lot of season 3 in my head :P

REVIEW! I want to know what you thought about the chapter and the finale!


	31. Chapter 31

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

A/N: My biggest concern with posting this story in spread out chapters instead of one big chunk is that Payson might come off as slutty instead of just really, really confused. Fair warning… Payson and Sasha sexiness ahead.

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><p>Payson wasn't asleep, but she wasn't awake either. They were sitting on her bed together, with her back resting against his chest and his legs settled on either side of hers. He hadn't realized how much he missed spending time with her until they sat together watching the men compete. It felt so right to have her curled against him, and it had been days since they had time to sit together like this.<p>

As usual, her mind was bent in the same direction. "I've missed you."

"I was just thinking the same thing," he said, pressing a kiss to her shoulder. "It seems like it's been longer than four days."

She hummed her agreement and brushed her nose against his neck. "I've been meaning to look for a house for us for when we get back, but I'm always so tired. I haven't been online all week."

"I've looked, but I haven't found anything yet. They're all condos, nothing with a yard." It had been quite frustrating. They knew exactly what they wanted, but it didn't seem to exist. Every time he looked he wound up wanting to chuck his laptop at the wall.

"Maybe we should just buy a house instead of renting," she suggested. "There would be a lot more choices that way."

"Isn't that a little bit… permanent?" he asked. He meant it when he said that he would be around as long as she wanted him there, but he didn't want Payson to feel obligated to stay with him because they owned a house together.

She picked up his hand and started tracing the lines on his palm; he wasn't sure if she was trying to relax him or herself. "It doesn't have to be," she said. "It's not like we'd be signing a twenty year mortgage. We'd own the house outright, so it wouldn't be a problem to sell it if we wanted to. It's certainly a better investment than throwing our money away on rent for the next few years."

"It's not a bad idea," he admitted, lacing his fingers with her. "It would be easier to find what we want if we were buying, and it would probably be good for the baby to stay in the same house instead of having to pick up and move in a couple of years."

She snuggled back against him and sighed. "When we have a house can we do _this_ every night? You have no idea how badly I needed to just relax like this."

He had a pretty good idea, because he'd felt the same way since they landed at Heathrow, but she was the one who was sick and pregnant, so her need was probably more intense. "You should go to sleep, love. You need to be as rested as possible for tomorrow. I'll stay here with you 'til you fall asleep."

"You'll stay here with me all night, Sasha Belov," she said, glaring at him from beneath her lashes. "Don't get any ideas about sleeping in the spare bed. We only have a few hours together and I don't want to spend them on opposite sides of the room."

"Has anyone ever told you that you're bossy?" he asked, unable to hide his smile. She answered that Becca told her that all the time.

He watched her as she changed clothes. It should have felt skeevy, but it didn't. He was admiring her beauty, yes, but not in a sexual way. It was like the difference between looking at a playboy centerfold and a well painted nude. One was meant to entice you and the other was meant to entrance you, and Payson was definitely entrancing. The muscles rippling in her back as she pulled her shirt over her head, her silky hair cascading over her skin, the curve of her breast just barely visible as she slipped off her bra—she was every artist's dream, the muse that would never stop inspiring. He'd seen Payson in nearly every state of undress possible, short of complete nudity, but the _action_ was something different altogether.

She was just as beautiful putting clothes on as she was taking them off. The soft camisole and cotton shorts she wore to sleep in were nothing special, but she imbued them with beauty. On her they were as breathtaking as the finest silk and lace.

She blushed when she turned around. "Were you watching me?" she asked, with curiosity but no hint of accusation.

"It's hard not to. It's like trying to look away from a Degas." Sasha grew up enraptured by the work of Degas. As a little boy, he liked the paintings because they reminded him of his mother, but as he grew older he learned to appreciate the beauty of the art. Payson knew better than anyone in the world what a compliment he was paying, which was part of the reason he didn't feel guilty about watching her undress. The level of comfort between them was such that they could admire one another without embarrassment. He knew she watched him in the same way.

She sat down next to him and leaned her head on his propped up knee. She said, "I wish I could see myself the way you see me."

"Maybe one day I'll hire an artist to paint you," he teased, "So that you can know how beautiful you really are. A painting of you could go down in history. You'd turn the artist into the next Leonardo Da Vinci."

His tone was joking, but he meant what he said. She was the most beautiful woman he'd ever seen. A faint red glow spread across her cheeks and down her exposed chest, making him wonder how far down that blush went. His eyes flickered down of their own volition, and he took a brief moment to appreciate the swell of her breasts and the shadowed valley between them. For the first time he realized that her top was thin enough for her nipples to be visible through it, and they hardened as he watched. He knew that he was aroused by Payson—how could he not be?—but this was the first indication that she might be equally as affected as him. It never occurred to him that she might feel anything other than a general appreciation for the male body when she watched him.

She turned her head away from him and he realized that his gaze had lingered for too long. Her blush deepened and she asked, "Does it make you uncomfortable, sleeping with me? Or just being so physical with me in general?"

"Does it make _you_ uncomfortable?"

"No. Well, yes," she said, facing him again, "but not in the way you mean."

His eyebrows knit together. "I don't understand."

She huffed out a silent laugh. "Are you particularly comfortable right now?" she asked, looking brazenly to his crotch and then back to his eyes.

"Ah, got it. Is that something you're okay with, though? Feeling that way… and me feeling that way." They had never really discussed the physical aspects of their relationship, mostly because he didn't realize it was an issue for her. He'd been dealing with his attraction ever since she moved in and, if he was honest with himself, for a long time before that. He'd mastered the art of not thinking about it.

"It's always been that way for me," she admitted, "Ever since I've known you. I learned to ignore it. But you didn't answer my question. Am I making you uncomfortable?"

He cupped her cheek and forced her eyes to meet his. "No. You're a very beautiful woman and I can't stop the way my body reacts to you, but that doesn't have to affect our friendship. We have something very special here, Payson, and I don't want to screw that up."

"I don't want to screw it up either, which is why I need you to be honest with me. Am I making this harder for you?" She grimaced at the unintended pun but pushed past it. "I'm all over you all the time, and I never stop to think about what I'm wearing or if you would be uncomfortable when I change clothes in front of you. I can stop doing that if it would make things easier for you."

"I don't want you to stop," he assured her. "I don't want you to have to think about the way you act around me. I like that you trust me enough to be yourself around me, and I like that you're all over me all the time." She chuckled at his use of her words. "That feels right for us. We're both very physical people and it makes sense for us to be physical with each other. Besides, you're not the only one whose behavior could change. I shouldn't have been looking at you the way I just was."

She blushed again and said, "It's flattering. Other men don't look at me like that, not even Austin. They just see my body and my face. You see more."

She was right, but he was surprised that she was aware of the difference. He was very aware of her body, but what kept him enraptured was the grace and sensuality she exuded without even trying. She was just as beautiful in a baggy t-shirt and sweats as she was naked… although he usually tried to ignore it when she was naked. Usually being the operative word.

"I will always see more, Payson. Always." He kissed her on the top of the head, and then again on the lips, just to prove a point. He didn't want her to think that things had changed between them, or that they needed to change. "Now come on, let's go to sleep. As much as I would love to, we can't stay up all night talking."

He moved to take off his shoes and she sat by, biting her lip. "I know this is going to sound strange, in light of the conversation we just had, but you are not sleeping in your clothes. You sleeping in denim would be just as bad as me sleeping in denim. It's still going to be rough against my skin."

"Don't you think we should leave at least some lines uncrossed, Pay?"

"You just watched me undress," she pointed out, "and we had a conversation about how turned on we are by each other. You sleeping in your boxers pales in comparison to the lines we have already crossed tonight." She nudged her foot against his thigh and joked, "Don't worry, I'm too tired to take advantage of you anyway."

This was exactly what got him into this situation in the first place. She was impossible to say no to. He crossed a boundary when he got into bed with her the night before they left, and it had changed their relationship. This was the first time they had been alone long enough to test the new waters; so far they were looking pretty deep. They were more than friends but not lovers, and he didn't know what the rules were anymore. He gave in.

He tried to pretend that her eyes weren't following him as he slid off his jeans, but he couldn't ignore the way her gaze lingered on the slight tenting of his boxers. He threw her a challenging look.

"What?" she said. "You can enjoy looking at me but I can't enjoy looking at you?"

He didn't have a good argument so instead he said, "Get in the bloody bed, Payson."

She bit back a laugh and shook her head. She moved so that she was kneeling on the bed beside him and reached for the hem of his polo, letting her knuckles brush across his abdomen as she pulled the shirt over his head. She didn't take her eyes from his, but her fingertips slid down and explored the hard planes of his chest.

"You know," he said, "I've had sex that was less sexual than this." His words broke the tension between them and the electric charge in the room died down. Payson giggled and leaned against him, wrapping one arm around his shoulder and the other around his torso and burying her head in his neck. This, at least, was nothing new. She'd hugged him while he was shirtless before. The only difference was that now he was wearing boxers instead of pajama pants. That, and the fact that he was incredibly aroused.

She pressed a hot, open mouthed kiss against his throat and his boxers got just a little bit tighter. "It's better this way," she said, "knowing that it's not just me. Even though it doesn't change things, it's good to know that it's reciprocated."

"If I'd known that, I wouldn't have worked so hard to hide it." He wasn't actually serious. Their relationship had always been strong, but their friendship could not have withstood a mutual admission of desire even a few days earlier. Even now, he couldn't let his attraction get out of hand like it had tonight. It would put too much of a strain on them.

Payson seemed to realize that they were pushing too hard at their boundaries, because she pulled away. "Come on, let's go to sleep. I've already stayed awake way to long."

He turned off the lights and they climbed under the covers of the too-small bed where she settled into her customary place on top of him. They had not thought this through. He could feel her hard nipples against the bare skin of his chest and one of her legs was hooked over his so that not only was her thigh brushing against his erection, but he could also feel the moist heat of her own arousal as she pressed against him. He had a brief second of conceited pride for having turned her on so much without even touching her before she interrupted his thoughts.

"We didn't think this through."

"We really didn't. Do you want me to sleep on the other bed?" It was probably a bad thing that he wanted to stay exactly where he was.

"No. I want you to sleep here, but I don't want to make you stay if you're too uncomfortable. That's not fair to you."

He kissed the top of her head and told her not to worry about him. "I'll go wherever you want me to go." His balls might be permanently blue by the next morning, but he wasn't going to leave her if she needed him.

He wasn't going to be able to sleep anytime soon, but she was too exhausted to stay awake. Right before she drifted off she said, "Sasha?"

"Hmm?"

"Thank you, for taking my mind off of everything else for a little while." She pressed a kiss to his jaw and he tilted his head so that she could press another one to his lips. And then she was asleep.

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><p>AN: Poor, delusional Sasha. He doesn't want her to change her behavior for him, but that really isn't going to work. When you hang around someone of the opposite sex all the time, you have to make at least some small changes.

How long do you think they can stay 'just friends'? The person who guesses closest will get virtual cookies :) REVIEW and let me know!


	32. Chapter 32

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

A/N: I think a lot of ya'll may be a little over optimistic about Payson and Sasha's relationship :D As Payson would say, attraction is not the same thing as love, and Payson and Sasha aren't in love (yet). She has to fall in love with Austin before she's ready to fall in love with Sasha, remember? Anam and Hazel got the closest, so virtual cookies to them :)

This chapter is a long one and a sad one.

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><p>Kelly waited until Sasha was gone to talk to Payson. He wanted her to sleep in, so if he knew that Kelly was going to wake her up he would go postal. She really needed to have this conversation without drawing attention to herself or to Payson.<p>

Sneaking into Payson's room was difficult with three other people in the apartment, especially when they were all mother henning her to death. Kelly breathed a sigh of relief when she closed the door behind her without getting caught. Payson was fast asleep in her tiny bed, but the other bed looked suspiciously unrumpled. The ugly London 2012 comforter was exactly in place and there was no dent in the pillow where Sasha's head should have been.

"Payson?" She moved closer to the bed and said the name again, this time a little louder. Payson's eyes fluttered open, reflecting the confusion that she obviously felt at waking to find Kelly in her bedroom.

"Is something wrong? Sasha was supposed to come wake me—" she glanced at the clock "—in an hour. Did something happen?"

Kelly shuffled her feet, not knowing how to broach the subject. "No, I just… I just needed to talk to you about something important. I didn't want to do it in front of the other girls."

"Okay," Payson said, sitting up in bed. Her pajamas were a little too revealing for her to have worn while Sasha was in the room with her, and her top was kind of see-through. "What do you need to talk about?"

She sat down on the edge of Payson's bed and gathered up her courage. When she thought she had enough to talk she opened her mouth and asked, "How far along are you?"

"Nine weeks." Kelly was thrown by the answer. She had expected a denial. "How did you know?"

"You were throwing up in the mornings. I thought it was just because you were sick, but that didn't really fit because it was only at that one time, around ten o'clock on both days that you were at practice." That was what had initially got her suspicious, so she started looking for other clues. "And then I noticed that your boobs were bigger, and that every once in a while when you were sitting you would rest your hand on your stomach like you were sick or hungry, but you weren't either. It all just kind of… clicked."

Payson frowned. "I'm going to have to be more careful about putting my hand on my stomach like that. I didn't even realize I was doing it." There was a long pause. "Are you going to tell? We wanted to keep it quiet as long as possible."

"No," she promised, considering how much she wanted to say. She decided to put it all out there, since Payson was probably the one person in the world who would understand. "Listen, I've been in your position. I didn't get a choice, so I respect the one you're making. I'm not going to rat you out."

"You were pregnant?" Payson's question was whispered, like she was too afraid to say it out loud.

She nodded, refusing to let herself cry. "That's why I missed World Trials. I had to take time off after the abortion."

"Oh my God, Kelly, I'm so sorry." Before she could stop it Payson was hugging her, and before she knew it she was crying. The secret had been crushing her for so long that she'd forgotten what it was like to live without it. Telling Payson was like breathing for the first time in almost a year—necessary but very, very painful.

Payson waited until her sobs had abated before she asked, "You didn't have a choice?"

"No," she said, trying to wipe her eyes and shake her head at the same time. She was not successful. "My mom and Marcus scheduled the appointment before I could even process what happened. I mean, I probably would have done it anyway, but it would have been nice to have had options."

"You wouldn't have."

Kelly furrowed her brows, which just caused more tears to overflow from her eyes. She wasn't sure what Payson meant. "I wouldn't have had options?"

"No, I meant you wouldn't have done it. If you had the choice, you wouldn't have had the abortion." She took both of Kelly's hands in her own. "When I first found out, I said that if I couldn't have the Olympics _and_ the baby, I would choose the Olympics. I had good reasons, too, but I never would have gone through with it. Once I saw him, once I heard his heartbeat, he was my entire life. I'm glad that I didn't have to choose, but if I did, I would have chosen him. You would have too."

For some reason that she couldn't understand, that made Kelly feel better. It should have made her feel worse, hearing what she had lost, but instead it made her feel for the first time like her choice could be separated from her mom's choice. It made her feel like maybe she wasn't crazy for that small part buried deep inside of her that wished she had kept the baby. Before she could comprehend what she was doing, she hugged Payson.

She wasn't sure how long they stayed that way, but when she pulled away her tears were coursing down the bare skin of Payson's shoulder. She didn't even realize she was crying. She wiped her eyes again and said, "Thank you _so much_ for letting me get that out, but can we _please_ not talk about me anymore? I don't think I can take this any longer."

"I know what you mean," Payson said, laughing even though she was crying too. "I know this sounds strange, but Sasha makes jokes now when I cry on his shoulder. He lets me get it out and then when he knows it's too much he says something to make me laugh. God, I don't know what I would do without him."

She shouldn't be asking this, but she needed to get her mind off of herself for a little while. "Is he the father?"

Payson's reaction was unexpected. She laughed. "I'm sorry," she said, clapping her hand to her lips. "I'm sorry, I know I'm being completely inappropriate here. I may be a little hysterical. I just don't get it, though. Why does everyone think Sasha and I are sleeping together?"

It was inappropriate, but Kelly was just thankful that the attention was off of her for a little while. If they kept talking about her past she might break too much to pick up the pieces, so she was glad to move on. "I can't speak for everyone else, but I'm going off the fact that he obviously slept in this bed last night, and I don't really picture Austin as the sharing type. I figured he was just a cover."

Payson laughed again. She was right, she was a little hysterical. "Austin definitely is _not_ the sharing type. He's so jealous of Sasha that it's insane. He flipped when I told him I was living with Sasha, wanted me to come move in with him instead. It took a blow job to finally get him to drop the subject."

Kelly wanted to ask about the living with Sasha part, but she got stuck on the words 'blow job.' "Huh. You do that?" It sounded kind of… experienced. She figured that Payson would be awkward and shy in bed, the way she was during her one brief sexual relationship.

Payson shrugged. "That was the first time. Actually, that was the only time, because I got sick right after that and the only time we've been together since was… well, 'Austin taking care of me' was what Sasha called it. I was too tired to participate much."

"What _Sasha_ called it? You talk to him about sex?" Her brain told her body to pick her jaw up off the floor, but it didn't listen, so she kept staring gaping-mouthed at Payson.

Payson's eyes twinkled. "Oh, you have no idea."

Kelly shifted so that she was sitting cross-legged in front of her teammate, leaning forward eagerly. "So tell me," she begged.

Payson bit her lip, switching from playful to serious lightening fast. "I'm sorry, I've said way too much already," she said. "I have a big mouth and can't shut up sometimes, but I don't want to get Sasha in trouble. No offense, Kel, but it is _you_."

Ouch, that hurt. It was true, but it still hurt. "Please," she pleaded, "I'm not going to tell anyone. I need some juicy gossip to take my mind off of my own stuff. You know how that is, right?"

Kelly was getting to her, so she continued, "Besides, what could I do? Tell the NGO and get Sasha fired? We're already at the Olympics, I don't need to scheme anymore. And I did boycott competing because of you, so you totally owe me."

Payson caved. "Okay, fine, but you have to swear not to tell anyone about this. This never leaves this room."

She agreed without hesitation, happy that for once someone was actually trusting her. Payson blushed before she even began. "Okay, so Sasha and I are not having sex—we never have and we never will—but he did sleep with me last night, and things got… kind of hot."

"How hot?" Kelly asked. She couldn't imagine anything hot that could have happened in a bed that didn't involve sex, which Payson had ruled out. "I need details here."

"I told you I was living with him, right?"

She hummed her agreement. "Which I still want an explanation of, by the way, but I want to hear about last night first."

"Okay, well we have a really relaxed relationship. We're just completely ourselves around each other, no pretending." Now that she was talking she sounded eager to share, like maybe she needed the girl talk as much as Kelly did. "And I don't think about what I'm doing around him. I'll come out of the bathroom in a towel, or walk across the apartment in my bra to get something out of the dryer, and it just never occurs to me that I shouldn't be doing that in front of him."

Kelly's eyes were wide as saucers. "That's a pretty big thing not to think about. I wouldn't even have walked across the house in my bra when I lived with my mom."

"Whatever," she said, rolling her eyes. "It doesn't bother me. Sasha's seen a lot of women a whole lot more naked than he's seen me, so I don't think I showed him anything new."

"But I bet he was sleeping with all of those other women, too, so the context is different."

Payson frowned. "You don't get it. I think most people wouldn't get it, which is the problem. What Sasha and I have is a million times more intimate than sex. We are closer than most husbands and wives ever get. What I have a with Austin, who I _am_ sleeping with, is just a drop in the bucket compared to my relationship with Sasha."

"You're right, I don't get it." She wasn't sure she believed it, either. It sounded too fairy-tale to be true. "But what about last night? You said it got hot."

"It did. When we came in here we laid around for a while just being together, which I needed _so_ badly," Kelly knew what she meant when she said 'just being together,' but she couldn't imagine doing that with Marty. That was what she did with her boyfriend—well, ex-boyfriend—but not her coach. "And when it was time for me to go to sleep I wasn't ready to give that up yet so I asked him to sleep with me. That's pretty much what started it."

"And _it_ was?"

"Just let me talk," she admonished lightly, and then continued. "When I got up to put on my pajamas, Sasha watched me. It's not like he usually averts his eyes or anything when I undress, but that was the first time he's ever just watched me like that." Her eyes shone at the memory. "It was… I don't even know how to explain it. You have no idea how amazing it is to have someone look at you that way, like they're completely mesmerized by you. And he wasn't just looking at my body, he was looking at _me_, you know? I felt like the most beautiful person in the world."

Payson thought it was amazing; Kelly thought it was creepy and stalkerish, but she wasn't about to burst her new friend's bubble. Payson was lost in her own thoughts so Kelly prompted her to continue.

"Well, I sat back down with him and we were talking, about how he sees me so differently than I see myself, and all of a sudden his eyes went dark and he _was_ just looking at my body. It was like electricity was running between us, and I tingled everywhere our bodies touched, and it's us so we were touching in a lot of places." Kelly couldn't help but wonder exactly which places their bodies were touching. "I have never been so turned on in my life. I'm used to being turned on by Sasha, though—I mean, you've seen him, you know how gorgeous he is—but what surprised me was that he was just as turned on as I was."

"Wow," Kelly said, staring into space as she tried to imagine feeling that way herself. "That is really hot."

"That's not the hot part." Kelly's jaw dropped again and she listened as Payson related the brief moment of awkwardness between them and their frank discussion about their attraction for each other, and then her insistence that he take off his clothes and the wanton way she stared at him. "I swear Kelly," she said, "I don't have a lot of experience, but I haven't found anything yet that is more arousing than seeing a man hard for you. It's so… empowering, to know you have that kind of effect on him."

Her eyes glazed over when Payson told her about taking off Sasha's shirt. "Honestly, I wasn't trying to make things escalate like that. I was definitely teasing him, but I had no idea how intense it would get. Sasha said that he'd had sex that was less sexual than what we were doing, and I know exactly what he meant. Austin is amazing in bed, but this was on another level altogether. I'm not even sure how we managed to stay in control of ourselves."

She took a few minutes to process everything that Payson told her before she spoke again. "I don't get it. If this is there between you and Sasha, then why aren't you together? Why are you still with Austin?"

"What Sasha and I have is too important to screw it up with sex," she said, and then bit her lip. "… And I'm not really _with_ Austin, per se."

They spent the next half hour talking. Payson explained how she came to be living with Sasha and what normal life was like for them, and came clean about her complicated relationship with Austin, and Kelly reluctantly talked about her own botched relationship. She had never had a girlfriend to talk to like this, and she decided that she liked it. Girl talk wasn't as overrated as she always considered it to be. In fact, it was kind of relieving to stop all the secrets, lies, and schemes and just be herself. She was actually disappointed when they heard a knock on the door and Sasha stepped inside.

"Hey," he said, confusion evident on his face at finding the two girls together. "I brought you some breakfast."

He handed over a stryrofoam box and bent to kiss Payson on top of the head. Kelly had seen him do this before, but the way that Payson tilted her head up for an actual kiss was new. They didn't seem to realize they were doing anything unusual. They had a quick and very confusing silent conversation—Payson tugged on his hand, he raised an eyebrow, and she tilted her head—and then he sat down behind her on the bed and wrapped both arms around her waist. One of Sasha's feet was on the floor and the other was propped up on the bed on the other side of Payson's body, allowing her to lean back against him so that their bodies were touching all the way from the top of her head to their hips.

Payson opened the take out container and handed Kelly the spoon, an implicit invitation to share the food. Kelly shrugged and took a bite of the omelet. If Payson and Sasha were going to act like everything was normal, she would too.

"You know," Payson said between bites, "Being able to eat a little bit beforehand has actually helped my morning sickness. That's kind of counterintuitive, huh?"

She responded to some minute change in Sasha that Kelly couldn't decipher by kissing him on the side of his jaw, whispering "I'll explain later," and then kissing him on the lips again. For some reason, the kiss on the lips seemed way more innocent than the kiss on the jaw. It was just a swift peck, but Payson's kiss on his jaw seemed like a caress, like the way a woman would kiss a man. Definitely not platonic.

"What you're doing now is better?" Kelly asked, pretending she wasn't weirded out by their behavior. "Because you sounded like you were puking your guts up on Friday."

"Yeah, well, I was, but puking my guts up could be taken literally the way I was before. It was horrible."

"Ugh, sounds like." She never experienced that when she was pregnant. She was a little queasy sometimes, but she just chalked it up to a stomach bug. It didn't occur to her until after she found out she was pregnant that it might have been morning sickness.

They moved on to less awkward topics, and after a few minutes Sasha relaxed enough to join the conversation. Talking with him wasn't a weird as she thought it would be. He told stories about his time at the Olympics and his rivalry with Marty, and Kelly realized with a shock that Sasha was nearly ten years younger than her coach. In that light, it wasn't nearly so strange for Payson to be hanging out with him.

He didn't stay long. They had to leave for the training center in twenty minutes and Payson still needed to get ready, so he left as soon as the two girls finished breakfast. As Kelly went back to her room to finish packing her gym bag—Sasha had already packed Payson's for her—she couldn't help but wonder if Sasha would have stayed if Kelly hadn't been there. Payson might believe that there was nothing going on between them, but Kelly sure didn't. They were walking a fine line, and there was a pretty big possibility that they had already stepped over it.

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><p>AN: Okay, so I stole Kelly's story line from one of my favorite authors. I won't say who, though, because that would give too much away.

I'm going to try really hard to find a couple of hours tomorrow to respond to ya'll. In the meantime, REVIEW! Reviews are very inspiring, and I'm trying my damndest to write right now :)


	33. Chapter 33

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

A/N: It's starting! It's starting! Qualifying is going to span several chapters, because obviously it's very important :) Also, this whole chapter is very tongue in cheek about the U.S. commentators.

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><p>"We are live from the North Greenwich Arena in London, England on day one of the ultimate event in women's gymnastics, the Olympic Games. I'm Al Trautwig, with Olympic Gold medalist Tim Daggett and Elfie Schlegel, and the U.S. women are about to start off these Games on floor. Tim, you've been in their shoes, how are they feeling right now?"<p>

"Well, Al, if they're anything like I was they are about to be sick. This is a team with incredible international experience, but the Olympics are an experience like no other. They have to be feeling the nerves right about now."

"And I'm sure they are. There is tremendous pressure on these girls. The United States has not won an Olympic Team gold since 1996, and many people think this is the team to do it, but they started off this competition with a scandal and a near disaster. Tell us about that, Elfie."

"It involves Payson Keeler, Al, the current World All Around Champion and the girl expected to take home multiple gold medals in these Games. She has the highest degree of difficulty in the world right now—actually, she has the highest degree of difficulty seen since the new scoring system was implemented in 2008—but there was some controversy over whether or not she would be allowed to compete. It was revealed yesterday that she had failed her pre-competition drug test."

"Unfortunately those results were misleading, Elfie. Payson tested positive for blood doping due to an emergency blood transfusion she received about a week ago, but the leaked results have a lot of people up in arms. There is good motivation for her competition to want her disqualified. She is expected to medal in every event this week. If she was out, several other countries would have a better chance at making it to that podium."

"That's right, Tim, and I think it's safe to say that America would not be taking home the team gold if Payson Keeler didn't compete. Is there any word on how those results were leaked to the public?"

"There is, Al, and what is so shocking is that it came from within our own National Gymnastics Organization. It was discovered earlier today that former National Team Coordinator Ellen Beals was responsible for the leak."

"That is just shocking, Tim. I don't know what it is, but it seems that Ellen Beals holds a grudge against Payson Keeler. The reason that she was removed as National Team Coordinator about a year ago was because of a previous attempt to discredit Payson. There is no love lost between those two women."

"I said before that the women started off the competition with a scandal and a near disaster. We've heard about the scandal, now, Tim, tell us about that disaster."

"Well, it seems that the name to know at these Olympics is Payson Keeler. Shortly after the news broke about her drug tests, she shocked the Olympic community by being rushed to the hospital, unconscious. We have here some footage taken at the scene yesterday. You can see the faces of her coach, Sasha Belov, and her boyfriend, Austin Tucker, as Payson is loaded into the ambulance, and they look terrified."

"She certainly has caused a stir here in London, although this is probably not the kind of attention she was hoping to get. It is still a little unclear exactly what happened, but a statement released yesterday morning stated that she is suffering from a rare blood disease requiring frequent transfusions. The Olympic Committee has assured the public that no disciplinary action will be taken against Payson for her failed drug test, since it resulted from a legitimate medical need. I think I can speak for us all when I say that we are hoping for a speedy recovery from our favorite American gymnast."

"Yes we are, Al. Now the Americans have just finished warming up their tumbling on floor and the competition is ready to begin. Starting off this rotation will be Captain Emily Kmetko. She has really come a long way since her elite debut at last year's Visa National Championship. Now, she placed twelfth at that event, barely qualifying for the National Team, but just a few months ago at her second National Championship, she placed fourth behind Payson Keeler, Kelly Parker, and Kaylie Cruz. She has had a remarkable year."

"She certainly has, Elfie. She will not be competing All Around in this competition due to the new team system in which only four girls compete on each apparatus, and that's a shame. At the World Championship last year, Emily shocked the world by placing sixth in the All Around standings during the first round of competition. Of course, only the top two girls from each country are allowed to compete, so Emily had to sit out the finals while teammates Payson and Kelly swept through the competition to take the gold and bronze medals."

"This routine really suits her. It has all of Emily's natural fire and spirit combined with the grace and precision favored by Coach Sasha Belov. And here comes her two and a half punch front—flawless!—and Emily has been quoted as saying that is her favorite pass in this routine."

"You know, there is something funny about that statement and I have not been able to find out what it is. She and her teammates laugh when she says that, but they will not share the joke. It just goes to show you how close their team really is."

"They really are, Al, and you can see that in the way her teammates are cheering for her right now. She's coming up on her final tumbling pass here, a triple twisting back salto, and they are on their feet. It's beautiful and—bam!—with a stuck landing, and we've got a fist pump from Payson Keeler and very bouncy hug between teammates Lauren Tanner and Kaylie Cruz. They are thrilled."

"Kaylie Cruz is up next and the two girls share a quick hug on the stairs. Emily gets a big hug from her coach and hugs from each of her teammates, and you just don't see that from any other team in this arena. Gymnastics is ultimately an individual sport and these girls are competing against each other for a spot in the event finals, but they don't seem to realize that."

"And here's the green light for Kaylie. This is where she really stands out from the crowd. She is a contender on both the vault and balance beam, but floor is the event that most fans associate with Kaylie Cruz. It was this event that won her the Visa National Championship last year."

"That's right, Al. Kaylie has a lot of personality and floor is the place to show that. The judges love her. Now here's something interesting that she does—a tour jete raising her back let to a ring position. It doesn't have a very high difficulty rating, but it is beautiful to watch."

"In contrast to teammate Payson Keeler, who gets much of her difficulty from her dance skills, Kaylie's high level skills are all acrobatic. Coming up is one of her most difficult tumbling passes, a double Arabian. That's a half turn and then two flips in the air, just insanely difficult, and Kaylie makes it look easy here."

"You mentioned Payson Keeler, and interestingly, she does this same skill in the stretched position in her floor routine, which is worth two difficulty points higher than Kaylie's tucked double Arabian. But that is Payson's only high level tumbling pass, whereas all four of Kaylie's are loaded with difficult skills."

"And here is her last tumbling pass, a forward salto with a half twist straight into a backward double salto with a full twist—which is like her double Arabian but backwards and with an extra half twist. Ooh! A big step on her landing. That's unfortunate, but she recovers and ends with a big smile on her face."

"Well, while Kaylie was performing, the scores came back for Emily Kmetko. She received a 14.65, a very decent score, but it won't get her into the event finals."

"It won't, Al, but Kaylie has a good shot, as does her teammate Kelly Parker who is taking the floor now. She's a crowd favorite and has long been noted as Payson Keeler's fiercest rival. It seems that in the last year she has bowed out gracefully and let Payson take the spotlight, and Kaylie Cruz is now her biggest competitor."

"They have very similar styles. Both gymnasts are very upbeat with their routines, as compared to Emily whose style is more dramatic, and Payson whose routines are all about grace. Kelly has just started and already she has the audience clapping along with her music. In fact, she is clapping along to her music, which is very unusual in a floor routine, but she prides herself on being unique."

"And unique she definitely is, Elfie. She changed her music after last year's Worlds, and I won't even attempt to tell you the name of her new song, because I can't pronounce it. She wanted her floor routine to have more of a personal connection, so she chose the music of a Filipino folk song that her grandmother sang to her as a child. She told us in an interview last month that she felt like she lost her Filipino heritage when her father died at a young age, and this music was a way to get back to her roots."

"And the change has done her well. Since she changed her floor routine, she has consistently scored higher executions score than she did with her old music. She has a real passion for this routine, and the judges can see it and have rewarded her for it. Look at this—she does a one and a half backward salto straight into a one a half _forward_ salto, and look at the smile on her face when she sticks that landing."

"Tim, I hate to interrupt you, but the scores have just come up for Kaylie Cruz. She scored a 15.4, which is definitely high enough to get her into the event finals. The only question now is will she be in the top two for her country."

"It will be close, Al. She only has a one tenth point advantage on Kelly in difficulty, and as Tim said before, Kelly has been consistently scoring high throughout this past year. Here comes her last tumbling pass, a double front, and she sticks the landing, and it's down into her final position with a huge smile."

"Kelly Parker with a fantastic routine, and she's off the podium and straight into the arms of her coach, Marty Walsh. Kelly is the only girl on this team who isn't coached by Sasha Belov."

"All of the Rock girls, as they're called, credit their success to their coach. In particular, the girl who is taking the floor right now says that Sasha Belov is the reason that she is here today. As many of you will recall, Payson Keeler fractured her spine during last year's National Championships, and during her time out she had a growth spurt, leaving her unable to perform many of her old skills. She says that Sasha Belov believed in her when she couldn't believe in herself."

"Payson Keeler is largely touted as the greatest gymnast the sport has ever seen, a sentiment that I happen to agree with, and in a way her injury is responsible for that status. It forced her to become a more artistic gymnast, and as she slowly regained many of her old power moves, she has become the most complete gymnast in the world."

"I just hope that we get to see that gymnast today, Elfie. Payson was in the hospital yesterday and the word around the gym is that she sat out much of practice over the past few days, and anyone familiar with her can tell that she is not feeling well today. She is lacking her usual vivacity. It's possible that what we see from her today won't be up to standard. Let's watch and see."

. . .

"Her dancing is just beautiful. This is a move that was named after her after she performed it at the World Championships last year, a switch ring leap with a full turn. It's been rated as an E-level skill."

. . .

"Payson, unlike most gymnasts we will see here this week, gets most of her difficulty from her dance skills. The eight hardest skills are added together to form the difficulty score, and at least three of them have to be dance elements. Most gymnasts have B and C level dance skills, and the really talented ones like Kaylie and Kelly have C and D level skills. Payson's are all D's and E's, and she actually takes four of her top scores from dance elements instead of the required three."

. . .

"This tumbling pass here, it's the same one that Kelly Parker does but in reversed order, a one and a half forward and then a one and a half backward. It doesn't add to her difficulty value, but it does give her a one tenth point connection bonus."

. . .

"And here is another skill that is named after her, a triple turn with her leg in a back attitude, another E-level skill."

. . .

"Here is her final tumbling pass, the double Arabian stretched. It looks like a completely different skill than Kaylie's double Arabian tucked. One is all power and the other is all grace."

. . .

"Well, Al, you said you weren't sure if Payson could live up to her potential while she was ill, and I think she just answered your question. That was the most beautiful thing I have ever seen."

"Folks, you can't see us on your screen right now, but Elfie Schlegel is crying."

"She's not the only one, Al. Most of the people in this arena have tears in their eyes, including me, and some are openly sobbing. Look at this footage—we have Nastia Liukin and Alicia Sacramone in the stands and they are both crying, and Genghi Cho of China who is finished up on vault is wiping her eyes. Payson Keeler has moved the entire North Greenwich Arena to tears."

"She has said in interviews that one of the things she worked on during her comeback was how to tell a story with her body, and I think we all know what story she is telling today. She's off the podium with a hug and a kiss for coach Sasha Belov, and a silent conversation with boyfriend Austin Tucker across the arena."

"Here are her teammates, with a much more subdued congratulation for Payson than they had for each other. I'm not sure if they are still trying to get control of their emotions or if they are making a conscious effort not to overwhelm Payson. They do seem very protective of her."

"They certainly do care about her, Elfie, that's for sure. I heard a rumor—bear in mind that this is just a rumor, I don't know for sure—but I _heard_ that she was removed from the team due to concerns about her ability to perform, and her teammates refused to compete unless she was reinstated."

"Well, I think all doubts as to her ability to perform have been removed at this point. Not only was her floor routine touching, it was also flawless. We can expect huge scores for her."

"The American team is headed to the vault, and the arena is still anxiously awaiting the scores for Payson Keeler. And here it is—Tim, am I really seeing this?"

"I was just wondering the same thing myself, Al. Payson scored a 16.4. If I'm not mistaken, that's the highest score that has ever been awarded on floor under the new scoring system."

"That's not just the highest score ever awarded, it's the highest by a _lot_. That was a record already held by Payson from the event finals at Worlds, and she just broke it by nearly five tenths of a point. Her execution score was a _9.7_. That is the closest to a perfect ten we will probably ever get under the current scoring system. This is unbelievable."

"Well, there you have it, folks. Payson Keeler has just made history."

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><p>AN: If any of you were wondering, Nicole Anderson really is Filipino. And if you want to see the team leo for qualification, go to pinterest(dot)com/flowerchild3286

What are your predictions? Will Payson make it all the way though? Who will qualify for the floor finals, Kelly or Kaylie? REVIEW and let me know!


	34. Chapter 34

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

A/N: Okay, yes, I did forget to post last night, but I swear it's not my fault. It's JCI's *throws her under bus* I started watching Dance Academy on her recommendation and got so caught up in it that I forgot all about posting.

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><p>"You know, if you don't want people to think you're together, you probably shouldn't kiss him on the lips in front of millions of viewers."<p>

Payson rolled her eyes. "Whatever, Kelly. We're not going to change our behavior just because—Oh my God."

"What?" Kelly turned from where she was setting her gym bag in a chair by the vaulting podium. "Oh my God."

All five girls stood completely still for several seconds, looking at the massive score board hanging above their heads. Then Emily screamed and they all recovered enough to pounce on Payson in a group hug. Then they recovered enough to remember that Payson felt like shit and probably didn't want four girls jumping on top of her.

"Payson, that is amazing," Emily said, with all of her usual earnestness. That was the one good thing about Kmetko—when she said something, she meant it. No backhanded compliments, no false promises, just the truth. As much as Kelly hated to admit it, Emily was a pretty good captain.

"I can't believe this. Is that real?"

"It is real," Sasha said, walking up behind Payson and putting his hands on her shoulders. "And you deserve every tenth. But you can't get distracted by this, none of you can. We still have three rotations to get through and our warm up period is about to start. All of you, get going. Payson first, and then _sit down_," he said, glaring at Payson. She was supposed to stay sitting during floor but didn't. "And then Lauren, Kaylie, and Kelly."

Warm ups were always insanely fast. They were over as quickly as they started and the Lauren was up. She had two solid vaults and would have a real shot at the event finals if she didn't have three teammates who were better. Kelly, Kaylie, and Payson could easily make up the top three girls in qualifying, but only two would be allowed to compete in the finals.

Payson was a shoo-in, her vaults were always flawless, but it would be tight between Kaylie and Kelly. Kelly had the higher DOD, but Kaylie had the better execution. It was the opposite on floor and Kelly came out on top. She wasn't really sure what she wanted to happen in this rotation. She wanted to make the finals, obviously, but Kaylie didn't have a prayer on bars or beam and it would suck for her to not make any of the event finals. Kelly already had floor, so she wouldn't be too upset if Kaylie beat her out on vault. She would be upset if Kaylie beat her out for All Around finals, though, and it would be a close race. Their All Around DODs were almost identical.

Lauren's handspring front salto with a full twist was gorgeous, and it had the advantage of not being frequently used. Judges got bored of seeing Amanars and double twisting Yurchenkos all day, so it was good to throw them something different every now and then. It brought in a good score, too, a 15.075.

They all cheered for her as she jogged back up the run and she threw them a quick thumbs up. Kelly imagined hearing the judges groan when Lauren flashed her next vault, a double twisting Yurchenko. The American team was going to bore the hell out of the E-Panel. They had two doubles and two Amanars.

Kaylie was up next and it was obvious that she was Sasha's gymnast. He stressed technique and perfection, harping on the smallest errors until they were fixed, and the result was execution scores through the roof. Kaylie's Amanar scored a 15.975, but the low start value on her second vault might contradict that. She was doing the easier version of Payson's vault, a round off half on half off. The DOD was 5.6.

Payson was already taking the podium when Kaylie's second score flashed, a 15.15, giving her an average of 15.5625. It would be hard to beat. Kelly gave Kaylie an absentminded hug, but Kaylie was just as distracted as she was. The whole team was waiting for Payson's vault.

She looked exhausted, but when she got the green light she straightened her shoulders, smiled, and raised her hands in salute. She had one hell of a game face.

The whole world seemed to hold its breath while Payson pounded down the runway. Her feet hit the spring board, her hands hit the table, and in a quick twisting flash of her blue and red leotard, Payson was done. It was probably the best execution of that vault that anyone had ever seen, and she did it while she was ready to fall over with exhaustion. The score posted while she was chalking her feet for the next vault. A 16.05.

Kelly didn't watch Payson's second vault. She was up next, anchoring the event. She personally thought it was stupid for her to be the anchor, because even though her DOD was higher than Payson's, her scores never were. Sasha probably didn't want to look biased by putting Payson in the coveted last position in three of the four events.

Kelly had a strange version of tunnel vision when she competed. Mainly she saw the vault run, but she was aware of other things as well. She saw Marty setting the mat for her. She saw the judges at their table. Out of the corner of her eye she saw Payson and Sasha in an embrace that was far from appropriate given how many people were watching. And then she saw a green light and the only thing in her line of sight was the vaulting table.

There was something exhilarating about running full speed toward a stationary object. It defied the rules of logic, and that was what Kelly loved about it. That was what she loved about gymnastics in general. Gymnasts took all of the laws of gravity and inertia and common sense and said to hell with them. Like right now, as she flew through the air in her Amanar, she was telling gravity to shove it. And when she stuck her landing she was saying screw you to inertia, because this moving object was going to stop dead.

She didn't have time to look at her score, but she knew it was the best she'd ever done that vault. Everything had been perfect—her position on the vault deck, her momentum, her body alignment, her rotation. They would find deductions to take anyway, but in every way that mattered it was perfect.

Her Tsukahara double was different. It was a good vault, she didn't make any major errors, but there was something in the Yurchenko that was missing from the Tsukahara. It was that thing that made the difference between a good vault and a great vault. Kelly thought maybe it was insanity. Maybe what made the Yurchenko perfect was that insane joy that she felt at doing something that was stupid beyond belief.

She jumped off the podium and looked to the scoreboard, noting that she scored a 16.0 on her first vault, a career high. It felt like forever before her score popped up, and she almost couldn't comprehend what it meant. A 15.25, terrible execution when compared to Kaylie's second vault, but her DOD made up the difference. With an average of 15.625, she was in the event finals.

Payson had scored an unsurprising average of 15.725, cinching her a spot in the finals, probably top ranked. Kelly sat down next to her and said, "So I guess it's you and me in the event finals, huh?"

"Yeah," Payson said, trying (and failing) to look happy. "I'm sorry, Kelly, you know I'm happy for you, but I'm disappointed for Kaylie."

"Don't worry, PK, I get it. I'm kind of disappointed for Kaylie, too. She deserves a shot at a medal, but I'm not willing to give up the All Around for her, either. I was surprised it was me this time. I didn't expect that Amanar at all."

Payson's smile wasn't forced that time. "It really was a beautiful vault. That was the best you've ever done it."

"I know. I don't think I've ever had that much fun doing a vault." She sounded like a giddy school girl, but she didn't care. It was true. The vault she just did had been one of the most enjoyable experiences of her life.

Sasha was talking to Kaylie at the opposite end of their row of seats, and Lauren was there too, with her arm slung over Kaylie's shoulder, so Kelly took the moment of relative privacy to say, "You know, I was serious before. You shouldn't kiss him on the lips like that."

"Yeah, what's with that?" Emily asked, sitting down beside them. "I've never seen you do that before."

"Come on guys," Payson whined, "It's completely innocent. Nastia kisses her _dad_ like that."

"Yeah, but Sasha's not you dad. And he doesn't kiss Emily, Lauen, and Kaylie like that either, so it stands out. You need to stop doing it."

"I told you before, Kelly," Payson said, a note of frustration creeping into her voice, "We're not going to change our behavior just because it doesn't fit someone else's idea of normal. Kissing is normal for _us_."

Emily looked confused. "It's normal for you? I'm with you all the time at the gym and I've never seen you kiss him before."

Payson fidgeted in her seat. Emily didn't know the full extent of her relationship with Sasha, so it would be impossible to explain that she spent time with him outside of the gym, too. If Kelly hadn't stumbled on to the truth, she would be just as confused as Emily.

"I'm sorry, guys, I don't mean to be snippy, but we only have a few minutes left until the other rotations finish up and we have to move to bars. I would really like to spend that time resting. Can we talk about this later?"

It was evasive but true. She looked like hell. Her skin was turning pasty and she was slumped back in her chair, and she had none of her usual calm focus. She was exhausted and needed to rest. "Fine," Kelly said, giving in, "Just… don't do that thing where you kiss him on the jaw. It looks really bad, way worse than when you kiss him on the lips."

Kelly ignored Emily's confused look and walked away. Emily, playing the part of a good captain, stayed sitting by Payson for moral support. They didn't speak, and Payson had her eyes closed, but Kelly saw Payson reach out and take her friend's hand.

Normally she would never approach Lauren. Their abrasive personalities didn't go well together, so they tended to stay apart, but Kelly had a higher cause today. She walked to where Lauren was still sitting with Kaylie and Sasha and whispered in her ear, "I think Payson needs your make up skills. She's lost all of the color in her face and she looks horrible."

They were short on time, so Lauren hurried over to play Barbie with Payson's face. She had done Payson's make up every time they stepped out of the Olympic Village, trying to avoid the media frenzy that would occur if people saw what Payson _actually_ looked like right now. It was jarring to realize that, as horrible as Payson looked right now, she would look even worse without the layers of make up caked on her face.

Kaylie and Sasha both showed signs of wanting to go to Payson, so Kelly sat down and crossed her legs, feigning indifference for the cameras, and muttered, "Don't push it. She's a little overwhelmed right now and five people crowding around won't help. Emily has it covered."

The following conversation, all for the sake of the cameras floating around, was stilted and awkward, so Kelly was glad when they were signaled to move onto bars. They were halfway through.

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><p>AN: So Kelly's a little less cocky now and a little more team oriented. That probably has something to do with her talk with Payson, but it probably also has something to do with the fact that she's rooming with Emily ;)

Sorry to post this on here, but if folks don't log in when they review I can't respond to them privately. What I have to say is this: If you don't like the story, don't read it. This is not a hard concept. So if all you're going to do is bitch, don't bother to review. Everyone else, please do :)

On a nicer note, Dancerchick33 asked a question that was so fantastic that I thought I should answer it for all of ya'll :) She wanted to know who I like Payson with better, Austin or Sasha. The answer is that I don't have an answer. (Does that make sense?) I've been shipping Sasha and Payson since episode 3 when he first said "You're Payson Keeler," so they are my first shipping love, but I also really enjoy Austin and Payson together and I think the show missed out on a great opportunity with them. He could have loosened her up a little and she would have grounded him. Right now the imaginary world that I slip into when I'm stuck at traffic lights and such is Austin and Payson, but on another day it might be Sasha and Payson. That's what I love about this story. I get to play in both worlds :)

Review and ask me more awesome questions. I love answering them.


	35. Chapter 35

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

A/N: Okay, I _tried_ to post yesterday, I swear. They were doing upgrades on the site or something and wouldn't let me update my stories.

I'm slowing down the updates to every three days for a little while, until I can manage to write something. I haven't written anything other than those two little short fics, Luck and Starcrossed, for at least the past two months. I've been posting old stuff without writing any new stuff, so I need to slow down until inspiration strikes again.

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><p>Emily almost wished she was performing first. Sasha put her third for a reason, because scores tended to climb higher with each gymnast and she was expected to make the event finals, but her concern for Payson overrode her concern for her scores. She wanted to keep an eye on her friend, to gauge for herself if she was well enough to perform, but instead she had to concentrate on competing. Lauren, who wasn't competing on bars, would keep an eye on Payson in her place.<p>

It still surprised Emily when Lauren did something nice. It had been nearly a year since Lauren confessed to sending the training cam video to Ellen Beals, and she was a completely different person now. At Payson's insistence, she started therapy and worked to break her cycle of dishonesty. As time wore on, the person who shone through at her best moments became her norm, and she formed actual friendships with her teammates. Emily never thought she would see the day when she counted Lauren Tanner as a friend, but she did now, and she trusted her to take care of Payson. Payson was the first person to hold Lauren accountable for her actions, and Lauren's thankfulness had turned into devotion. She would do anything to protect her friend.

Kelly's apparent affection for Payson was new, though. There was something going on there, and Emily couldn't tell if it was good or bad. Kelly had a reputation for tricks and stratagems, but, then again, Payson had a reputation for bringing out the best in people. If Payson could work her magic on the Bitch of the Beam, it was possible that she could work it on Satan, too.

There was something strange going on between Payson and Sasha, and Kelly knew more than the rest of them. They all knew there was nothing romantic going on between them, no matter what other people said, but there had been a shift in their relationship lately. There was a new level of comfort there, even deeper than the close relationship they shared before, and Emily wasn't sure where it came from. It was like they were spending time together alone, but Payson wasn't staying late anymore, so when could they be seeing each other?

Kaylie sat down beside her and Emily realized with a jolt that she hadn't even noticed her compete. Instead of pretending to have seen her routine, she asked, "How do you feel?"

"Relieved that bars are over. I'm ready to move onto beam." The bars were Kaylie's biggest weakness. Not in the way that they were a weakness for Lauren, but she still struggled with them. It was always a relief to get your worst apparatus over with. As much as Emily would have liked the chance to compete All Around, she was relieved that she didn't have to compete on beam. All Around was a lost cause for her anyway. She would have placed within the top eight, but Kaylie, Kelly, and Payson would always be higher than her. It was enough to know that she was one of the best gymnasts in the world; she didn't feel the need to prove it.

She zoned out, knowing that Kaylie wouldn't mind. She was up after Kelly and she needed to visualize her routine. She stretched out of pure habit while she went over every handstand, every pirouette, and every release in her head, imagining Damon standing beside her, encouraging her, loving her, just like he always had. Her eyes snapped open and looked straight into Damon's across the stand, sitting with her mom and Brian. They were all wearing their homemade Team Kmetko shirts and cheering like crazy. Beside her mom, Steve Tanner had completely lost his professional manner and was screaming his head off. He was holding hands with her mom. She should have seen that coming.

As she made her way to the podium to switch places with Kelly, Emily nudged Lauren with her shoulder and nodded toward their parents in the stands. Lauren rolled her eyes, smiled, and said, "We should have seen that coming."

A year ago this would have completely thrown her off her game, but today it gave her strength. Her mom was happy, and she was getting along with Lauren, and she was about to show the world exactly what she was capable of. This was a night for the books.

When she mounted the bars, images flooded into her head. She was five years old swinging on the monkey bars at the park, laughing as she realized that she could make herself go upside down. She was eight and walking into a real gym for the first time, running straight for the bars and unintentionally showing up the girls who had trained there since they were toddlers. She was twelve and falling repeatedly as she tried to teach herself how to do a Comaneci. She was sixteen performing for Marty for the first time, hoping that he would think she was good enough to train at the Rock. She was in the gym with Damon, practicing her full in back out in the middle of the night. She was competing against China and winning her first international silver medal. She was receiving her bronze medal at Worlds. She was crying as they handed her an Olympic Team jacket… and she was dismounting.

She didn't bother with the stairs. She jumped straight down into Sasha's arms and let him swing her around, knowing without needing to see the scores that she was in the event finals.

"Thank you," she said, tears falling from her eyes. He didn't ask what for, because they both knew. He taught her trust and discipline, and he brought her here to experience this moment. She owed him everything.

She moved on quickly, aware that he needed to set up the spring board for Payson, and ran into a squealing group hug with her friends. They tried to sit down without letting go of each other, which wasn't going very well, when they saw her score, a 16.525, and the all broke into squeals again. That was huge, an execution score of 9.125. Nobody got those kinds of E-scores except Payson. Genghi's DOD was higher, but she couldn't execute like Emily did, which gave Emily a real shot at the silver.

It was because of Sasha. He stressed perfection, not letting them add a skill to their routine until it was flawless, drilling them constantly about something as small as a finger being placed incorrectly. He taught them to see what the judges saw, and with that insight they were able to correct errors that other gymnasts never noticed. He was the reason that they were winning.

The whole crowd quieted as Payson stepped up to the bars and her teammates gave up sitting down. They stood together holding hands, waiting with baited breath until Payson got the signal to mount. There were still athletes on floor and beam, but nobody was watching them. Payson had the highest DOD in the world on this event, and she performed it better than anyone ever had. Every eye was on her.

She was flawless. It was probably the best she had ever performed it, without even the smallest error, but her teammates could tell something was wrong. It was nothing concrete, no sign that they could point to that would explain their apprehension, but they all knew. Payson was crashing.

Lauren squeezed Emily's hand and whispered, "She would stop. If she couldn't do it she would stop and drop off the bars."

"I hope your right, Lo," Kaylie replied, squeezing Emily's other hand so hard that it hurt. They all held their breath as Payson performed her final release move, a piked Tkatchev, the move they all associated with the day she left the Rock for the hospital, and then swung to build momentum for her dismount. Her hands left the bar and she flipped twice through the air with a full twist on each salto. A double double stretched, the hardest dismount in the code of points.

The landing was perfect, ramrod straight, not even a bend in the knees, and looking like she hadn't done anything harder than hop off the bottom step of a staircase. She lifted her arms in salute to the judges, the smile that they loved so much firmly in place, but when she lowered her arms she couldn't do it anymore. The façade shattered and in the place of a fearless competitor stood a small, sick, scared little girl. Sasha, who was standing by to spot her, stepped to her side and she slumped against him, too tired to pretend.

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><p>AN: Dun dun dun.

A note on the gymnastics- The Comaneci that Emily teaches herself is a Comaneci dismount, not a Comaneci salto. If she tried to teach herself a Comaneci salto she would probably break her neck.


	36. Chapter 36

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

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><p>He was always terrified when she was on the bars. The image of her falling at Nationals played in his mind like a video loop, not stopping until she was safely on the ground again. Today was different, though. Today he saw her as she collapsed against him the previous morning, saw her face devoid of all color, saw the fear in her eyes when the doctor confirmed her suspicions that she might not survive. The worst part of it all was that he knew she was falling apart. With every minute she was losing strength and he didn't think she could make it though this rotation, much less the next one.<p>

Her second vault was the turning point. He knew as soon as she stepped off that podium that she had tipped too far over the edge of exhaustion to stay afloat. She fell into his arms the way she would at home, with complete abandonment of her pride and a desperate need to be comforted. The fact that she was lowering those walls in front of millions of people scared the hell out of him.

He let her salute before he came to her, knowing that she would want that dignity. As soon as her arms were lowered he was at her side, and she dropped all pretense of being well. She fell against him and he wrapped one arm around her shoulder and the other around her waist, supporting her weight. She wasn't even strong enough to stand by herself anymore. She moved her feet as they moved off the podium, but they both knew she wasn't really walking. He was carrying her.

He sat her down in a chair and kneeled in front of her, taking both of her hands in his. "Payson, be honest with me. How bad is it?"

She was leaning back in the chair and her eyes were closed, but her voice was strong when she answered. "Not nearly as bad as it looks, I swear. Just let me rest until it's time for me to compete and I'll be fine. I'll skip warm up and eat something and by the time I'm up I'll be okay again."

"Payson, I just had to carry you off of the podium. You are not going to be okay again in ten minutes." He wanted her to compete, but not if she was going to hurt herself doing it. No medal was worth that.

She opened her eyes and they were clear, not showing any signs of the feverish glaze that she had yesterday. "I'll be okay enough not to fall off the beam for ninety seconds. It won't be good and you'll probably have to carry me out of the arena afterward, but it will get me to the finals. I wouldn't take a chance if I wasn't sure."

He believed her, but only because he knew what was at stake. She might risk her own life to compete, but she wouldn't risk her baby. She would never allow herself to be overconfident and take a chance that could harm Alex, so she must be certain. He nodded his acceptance but added, "If you get up there and don't think you can do it, don't hesitate. Kelly's beam isn't great, but it's enough to get us to the finals if you have to scratch."

"I know, Alexandru. I won't risk it if it's too dangerous." He smiled at her use of his full name. It was part affection for him, and part reminder that her mind was in the same place as his. They were both thinking about the baby, and he was sure that Austin was as well as he watched from the stands.

He sat beside her and she leaned against him while they waited for the floor and beam rotations to finish up. Those rotations always took longer than vault and bars, so they had a few minutes for her to just rest. He nodded to the other girls to let them know that Payson was okay. Emily came over to get a report from him.

"She's fine, Emily. She's just tired and needs to rest, but she can still compete."

Payson mumbled against his bicep, "She's also awake and can hear you talking about her like she's not in the room."

He chuckled and kissed the top of her head, but judging by Emily's confused expression she didn't hear the joke. He jerked his head toward the other girls, who were standing with Marty and openly staring. "Tell them they need to be getting ready for beam. And warn them that Payson isn't going to warm up so they don't freak out when we get over there."

Emily left just as the last athlete mounted the beam. He reached to take off Payson's handgrips and stashed them in her bag, looking around to make sure they wouldn't be leaving anything behind, and before he could blink they got the signal to move. The other girls walked to the other end of the arena in formation, but Payson didn't bother to try. Sasha carried her gym bag and had one arm supporting her as they walked; normally Payson would balk at appearing weak like this, so it was a testament to how tired she was that she didn't protest his help.

She sat down and ate a banana while the other girls warmed up, and then leaned back and closed her eyes again. He barely noticed Kelly and Kaylie performing, which he felt guilty about. Kelly was Marty's gymnast, but he still should have been watching her, and he _really_ should have been watching Kaylie. It wasn't fair to ignore her. His consolation was that he knew Kaylie didn't mind. She was just as worried about Payson as he was.

She opened her eyes as Kaylie prepared to dismount. If he guessed right, she had been listening to the sounds of the beam reverberating with each of her teammate's skills. She was steady when she stood up for a quick stretch, and she showed no signs of doubt. He walked with her to the stairs but stopped her before she took the podium.

"Are you sure?" he asked.

She nodded her head once. "I am. I can do this."

He cupped her neck with both hands, trying to convey the depth of his emotions—love, support, pride, mixed with overwhelming fear. "Don't try to push yourself. If you can't do it, just hop off the beam."

"I know. I'll be careful."

He kissed her head and she kissed him back, which was a good sign because earlier she hadn't been able to, and then watched with dread as she climbed to the podium. Kaylie came to stand beside him and put her arm around his waist, and he wasn't sure if she was trying to take comfort for herself or give it to him. He put his arm around her shoulders and promised, "She'll be fine."

o-O-o

"So I think the question we're all asking ourselves here is will Payson Keeler compete? She did not look well after the last rotation and she didn't participate in the warm up for beam. Will this be where her hope for All Around gold ends?"

"It looks like she's going for it, Al. Here's her mount, an aerial walkover to the beam, very pretty. And here is her first big skill, a switch ring leap with a full turn. We mentioned earlier that that leap is named after her."

"She is about to do something really interesting here. She does a flic flac with a full twist, landing in a handstand and then lowering herself into a split position. This is a new move for her since the Olympic Trials one month ago."

"It is, Elfie, and it will bear her name after today."

"Now this pose that she does after it, Tim, I understand is being unofficially called a Payson. She is in a split on the beam with her body arched backward over her leg, very elegant."

"She is acquiring quite a few skills named after her, Al, and we're about to see another one coming up. First we have a split leap straight into a Yang-Bo, which mirrors that pose we just saw but in the air, and then an aerial walk over. Now here it is, a Wolf hop with two full turns. That is new since Worlds."

"It is only fitting that she should have so many moves named after her, Elfie, since she is reshaping the sport of gymnastics. From now on power alone will not be enough, the best gymnasts will have to combine grace and strength."

"Speaking of grace, here is her double illusion. Only three people in the world have done that move in competition, and one of them is her teammate Emily Kmetko. It is incredibly difficult and incredibly beautiful."

"Here comes her only flight series, where we can see some of that power. She does a flic flac layout to a full twisting layout, but not the best landing. You know, several gymnasts do multiple series, looking for connection bonuses, but Payson doesn't need to. Her skills are hard enough to give her a gigantic score without connections. In fact, I believe she has the highest DOD on this apparatus since the new code of points was introduced."

"How many times have we said that today, Elfie? She was tied with teammate Lauren Tanner for that record, but her new move pushed her ahead by one tenth of a point. There is the ten second warning bell, but no, it looks like she's not even trying. She's going to take the deduction for being over time. Now the dismount, a front handspring into a—whoa, that was not the dismount she planned! She was supposed to do a double salto forward in the stretched position, which would have been another skill named after her if she landed it, but she just did that tucked. And a big step on the landing, too."

"That is very surprising, Tim. She says that coach Sasha Belov does not allow her to do any skill that is tucked because it does not fit with her artistic image, so he can't be happy about that change."

"Overall I think we can say that this routine was not up to standard for Payson, but I am impressed at her ability to simply get through it. I was worried that she might be too sick to finish, and apparently so was her coach. One of our correspondents on the floor is telling us that before Payson took the podium, Sasha Belov told her to get off of the beam if she couldn't finish safely."

"Well, she did finish and it should be enough to get her into the All Around finals. She needed to score above a 12.95 to be in the top two from her country, and I think we can safely assume that she did. There were several errors, but her score is out of a possible 17.3."

"That's a 17.2 now, Tim, with the downgraded dismount."

"Excuse me, Elfie, it's out of a possible seventeen point _two_. That starting value makes up a lot of ground, and I would bet that she makes the event finals as well."

"Well, let's see. Her scores are being posted now. It looks like a 17.2 difficulty value, and an 8.8 execution score—that is the lowest I have ever seen from Payson—for a combined total of 16.0. That should get her into the event finals."

"Next up is Lauren Tanner, the best beamer on the American team, many think the best beamer in the world. She has even better execution on this event than Payson Keeler, and that is saying a lot, so this should be interesting."

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><p>AN: I haven't proofed this, so let me know if there are errors :)

REVIEW and let me know what you think. Also, remind me what happened, 'cause I straight up don't know what's in this section ;) I normally re-read before I post, but I'm running short on time tonight.


	37. Chapter 37

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

A/N: This might be a bit of a tear-jerker. I cried when I wrote it and again every time I read over it.

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><p>She came down the steps straight into his arms. She was hanging from his neck, not even able to support her own weight, so he maneuvered her to the chairs on the sidelines and helped her sit down.<p>

"I have to set the board for Lauren, but I'll be right back. I'm so proud of you." He dropped a quick kiss on her forehead and bounded up the podium to get ready for Lauren's beam. Behind him he heard Payson tell Lauren to go kick ass.

He got the board ready and turned to face Lauren. "I want to see Lauren Tanner out here, okay?"

She knew exactly what he meant. He wanted her to be the woman they had worked together to uncover, the one who performed the hardest tricks in the code of points with a huge smile on her face because she _loved_ it. She was scared for her friend right now, but she couldn't let that affect her. The best way she could help right now was to kick ass, just like Payson told her.

Just like Emily had after bars, Lauren hugged him and said, "Thank you," and it meant the world to him. He had changed their lives, but they had changed his more. Before he came to the Rock he had been a lonely, bitter man hiding from the world. Now he was happy, happier than he had been since his mother's death, and he had a family. He had four young women he would die for, one of whom was the most important person in the world to him. He owed them everything.

"Thank _you_, Lauren. Now show the world what you can do."

He watched her mount the beam with a flawless round off full stretched, a G-level skill, pulled the spring board away, and jumped down into the alley before they could deduct for him being there too long. He sat next to Payson and his other girls gathered around them, holding hands and cheering as Lauren dominated on beam.

Unlike Payson's beam, which depended on insanely difficult dance elements and a few key acrobatic skills, Lauren's beam was all about tumbles. She threw gigantic skills and amazing aerial series; a standing full; a full turning pike jump straight into a layout, now called a Tanner; a round off back handspring layout; an aerial cartwheel to the side connected with a flic flac into a hip circle; a double Arabian dismount. She made the hardest tricks in the world look easy and got the entire crowd engaged in her routine. Nobody rocked the beam like Lauren Tanner.

Even Payson, too exhausted to stand in support of her teammate, was screaming her head off. It still amazed him how supportive this team was of each other. Every single one would cheer for the others to beat them. She clutched his hand as Lauren powered into her dismount, getting huge height on it and sticking the landing cold. Sasha knew what she wanted without her even having to say it; he helped her stand and the whole stadium followed suit. Lauren Tanner, the last gymnast to perform in this round of qualifying, got a standing ovation.

Lauren saluted to the judges and then turned to them. They noise was deafening, but the team was close enough to all hear when she pointed to Payson and said, "That was for you."

She ignored the stairs and jumped down to them, rushing into the middle of a group hug, and Sasha knew that even if they didn't win a single medal, all the blood, sweat, and tears would be worth it for this one moment as the perfect team.

o-O-o

She couldn't believe this was happening. She knew that it would be close between her and Kelly, but she never considered this as a possibility. So as if to punish herself, she was sitting on her bed staring at the three custom leotards that she would never have a chance to wear.

They all had them. They had a leo for every event final they were expected to make, special ordered through GK to have the required USA insignia on the sleeve. Lauren and Emily each had one, and they would both get to use them. They knew coming in that they would qualify for beam and bars, respectively. Payson had five, one for the All Around and then four more specially chosen to go with the tone of each routine. She and Kelly each had three. Kelly would get to use all three of her. Kaylie wouldn't get to use any.

They were mocking her. She knew she shouldn't have bought three, but her mom insisted. She said that it was better to be safe than sorry, and that it wouldn't be the end of the world if one or two of them went unused. She shouldn't have listened. At best she would have made the All Around and one event final; she and Kelly both knew there was no chance that one of them would be in all three of the possible finals. Except that it _had_ happened, just not to her. The worst thing was that she couldn't argue with the results. She couldn't pretend like it was unfair or that the judges were biased, because she knew that Kelly was better than her today.

Kaylie's floor routine was good, and she executed it well, but it was missing what gave Kelly's floor that extra oomph: a personal touch. Sasha was always telling Payson to tell a story with her floor routine, and that was what Kelly did today. Kelly told them the story behind her music change one night at the Karolyi ranch, and it was easy to understand why she was so passionate about it. Her grandmother had written a letter to her every month for the past nine years, and Sheila, having never liked her husband's family, hid them. Kelly found out by complete accident. She got to the mail before her mother when they got back from Rio, and in it she found a letter from the Philippines addressed to her. She broke off ties with her mother because of it, but she was reconnected with her father's family for the first time since he died.

She hadn't expected to make the floor finals, not really. She would never have the passion that Kelly had for her routine. But she was surprised about the vault. Kelly was surprised, too, she thought. Vault was all about precision, and Kaylie had that in spades. All of the Rock girls did. That was the way that Sasha coached them, precision above power. Even with a lower DOD, Kaylie _always_ beat Kelly on vault. Even today, Kelly's average DOD was two tenths higher than Kaylie's and she only beat her by six hundredths of a point. That perfect Amanar Kelly did came out of nowhere, but the ability to do the unexpected was what made Olympic Champions. Austin's All Around gold in Beijing had been a fluke, just like Kelly's vault, but nobody could argue that either of them didn't deserve it.

What hurt the most was the All Around. If it hadn't been so close it might not hurt so much. Kelly beat her by five hundredths of a point. It just seemed so unfair that Kaylie could rank third in the list of qualifiers and not go to the finals. She supposed that Ivanka could still knock her down to fourth, but she doubted it. Nobody in the world had the kind of execution that the Rock girls had or the kind of passion that Kelly had.

Passion, that's what it all came down to. Kaylie just didn't have enough of it. Payson and Kelly loved the sport in a way that she had never understood. Nothing in the world could give them the joy that they found in the gym, and it showed when they competed. Lauren was never happier than when she was on the beam, and she brought down the house today not because of her moves, but because she was in the most stressful situation that and athlete could ever face and still managed to have the time of her life. The bars gave Emily a sense of freedom that she couldn't have in her normal life, so she flew every time she was on them. And then there was her. Sitting on her bed and staring at her stupid pink leos because she really really liked gymnastics, and that just wasn't enough.

There was a knock on the door and she yelled for whoever it was to come in. Really she wanted to say "leave me the hell alone," but she cared too much about her teammates to do that. They wanted to help her and it would hurt their feelings if she was rude about it.

Sasha stepped inside and closed the door. There was a time when he would have been uncomfortable doing that, but things had changed so much within the last year. Sasha wasn't just her coach anymore, he was family. He eyed the leotards spread out in front of her.

"Are you trying to torture yourself?"

"A little bit, yeah." Sasha chuckled, and because he knew her so well he knew that she was only half joking.

He picked up the leos one at a time and put them back in her suitcase. "No more torture. What happened today was unfortunate, but don't let it eat at you. Bitterness can destroy your life. Trust me, I know."

She didn't understand what had made him into the gruff, egotistical, unhappy man who first came to the Rock—Payson probably did—but she knew he was a different person now. "What changed?"

It wasn't the clearest of questions, but he understood. "I found something that I cared more about than myself. You. And Lauren and Emily and Payson. Even Kelly, in a way. You made my life worth living again."

"You didn't have that before?" she asked. That was really sad.

"I didn't." He reached forward and took her hand. "You do. Don't shut yourself off from your friends, Kaylie. There is more to life than gold medals. Ask Payson or Emily and they'll both tell you the same thing."

"I don't get it. Why Emily and Payson?"

"Because they both know what it is that makes their life worth living. Everybody figures that out at their own rate. It took me thirty one years. It took Payson eighteen and Emily seventeen, and you will figure it out when the time is right for you." He tilted his head in question. "Emily wants to talk to you. Is that okay?"

When he first knocked on her door, she didn't want to talk to anyone. After what he said, she was anxious to talk to her friend. She wanted to know what he was talking about. She wanted to know how to be okay with this, and it sounded like Emily might have some answers. "Yeah, that's okay."

He squeezed her hand and before he left he kissed her on the top of her head, just like he always did for Payson. It made her feel special. The connection he shared with Payson was beyond anything the rest of them could understand, and while she had stopped being jealous of that a long time ago, it was still nice to be included in that group in some small way. That kiss went a long way toward making her feel better.

Emily stuck her head in a minute later. "Can I come in?"

"Yeah. Sasha said you wanted to talk to me?"

She nodded and sat down on the bed. "I did," she said. There was a long pause while Emily seemed to collect her thoughts. "You know that I would probably have been in the top eight if I competed All Around, right?"

Kaylie was confused. That was not what she expected Emily to say. "Yeah. I hadn't thought about it, but you were sixth at Worlds and you've only gotten better. Were you upset that you didn't get a shot?"

"Not even a little bit," she said. Kaylie wouldn't have believed it if it was anybody but Emily. Emily was always sincere. "The way I see it, _I_ know that I'm one of the best gymnasts in the world. Not competing All Around doesn't make that any less true. It's not the medal that's important, it's the pride I feel in my accomplishments."

"You can really just be okay with that? You've worked your whole life for this. Don't you feel like… like you've failed?" It was the word she had been trying not to think for the past hour, but it actually felt good to put it out there. The thought wasn't crushing her anymore.

"I don't, and you shouldn't either. Kaylie, you placed within the top eight in three different events. You're top _three_ in the All Around. It doesn't matter if someone else takes home the medal, because you know, and the whole world knows, that you're better. I feel sorry for Genghi and Ivanka. Whichever one of them wins will spend the rest of their life knowing that it was an empty victory because they didn't get the chance to compete against you."

Everything Emily was saying was true, but Kaylie wasn't quite ready to accept it yet. Instead, she asked the question that she needed the answer to. "Sasha said that there was more to life than gold medals, and that I should ask you about that. He said that you had already figured out what made your life worth living. What is it?"

"It's you guys." Emily said it with such honest frankness that it brought tears to Kaylie's eyes. She knew the team was special to Emily, but she had no idea how special. "I spent my whole childhood alone. I love my mom and Brian, but it's not the same as having friends. When I first came to the Rock I was so happy to have a team, and then as time went by you became more than a team. You became family. If I had to choose between you and gymnastics, I would choose you every time."

Kaylie didn't know what to say, so she went with the only response that seemed appropriate for the situation. She hugged her friend. And she cried. She cried because she didn't make the finals; she cried because she didn't love gymnastics the way her friends did; she cried because she wanted so badly to find that thing that made her life worth living. But mostly she cried because she had never felt more loved than she did in that moment.

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><p>AN: I think Kaylie is a much more interesting character when she loses. Don't you?

If you want to see Kaylie's leos, go to my pinterest at pinterest(dot)com/flowerchild3286.

REVIEW and let me know if you cried (and, you know, anything else that you wanna tell me :D). I'll feel less like an emotional mess if I know other people cried too lol.


	38. Chapter 38

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

A/N: Lots of Paystin goodness in this chapter.

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><p>Payson was waking up.<p>

Austin sat on the side of the bed and laid a hand against her stomach. She smiled and looked at him through half-lidded eyes. "You know there is nothing to feel yet, right? No bump, no kicks. Just a very tired mommy."

He couldn't help but grin. "You've never called yourself that before."

"It sinks in just a little bit more every day, that I really am going to be a mom. Sometimes I think it was all a dream."

The grin fell from his face. "Do you want it to be a dream?"

"No," she said, covering his hand with hers. "As unexpected as this was, and as scared as I still am, I'm glad it's real. They say the biggest blessings are the ones you least expect."

There was a long silence, one that he would have felt the need to fill a couple of weeks ago, but now he was comfortable with it. She spoke. "I have to tell them."

"I thought you would say that." He knew that Payson wouldn't be able to keep this secret from her friends. She made it far longer than he expected, but it was just delaying the inevitable. They were too close to keep secrets from each other.

She sat up and wrapped her arms around his neck. "You don't mind?" she asked.

"I knew you would tell them, Pay. I've known since the beginning. I get that you're trying to protect Alex by keeping the pregnancy a secret, but lying isn't who you are. Especially not lying to your friends."

"Then why did you let me do it?" There was a strange sense of seriousness to the question. They both knew that Austin couldn't _let_ her do anything, but she was questioning his intentions. She wanted to know why he didn't try to talk her out of it.

He tried to explain. "You weren't yourself at the beginning, Pay. You were doing things that you wouldn't normally do and saying things that you wouldn't say, and I didn't know how to help you. Really, it's only been the past few days that you _were_ yourself, and I still don't even understand what changed."

Ah. There it was, written clear as day in her guilty eyes. Something happened with Sasha; that's what caused the change in her. He was the one who brought her out from the hole she had lost herself in.

She lifted her face and kissed him, long and slow and sultry, the way she kissed him when they had sex. There were so many possible motivations behind that kiss—maybe she was trying to avoid fighting about Sasha again; maybe she was looking for comfort; maybe part of the change he mentioned was that she actually cared for him now; maybe she just wanted to have sex. The one thing that was still the same, though, was that Payson Keeler confused the hell out of him and he would never understand her thought process.

She broke the kiss and laid back against her pillow with a sigh. "I want to keep going with that, but I am just too damn tired. Why do you think that is, anyway? I can get through a whole rotation in practice, sometimes two, so why did this wear me out so much?"

"The Olympics are different than practice," he said. This was something he knew from experience. "They are exhausting for everybody. It's like the thousands of people in the stands are sucking the energy out of you, and you didn't have very much to give. I'm so proud of you for making it through."

"I think that is the worst I have done of beam since that stupid Pinewood meet," she said, but with no hint of distress. She was laughing about it, which was just another in the long list of reasons that he loved her.

He laughed right along with her. "It was pretty horrible. You only qualified in third place, and I'm sure Ivanka is knocking you down another spot as we speak. I never thought I'd see you fall so far."

It was a joke, but the words could almost be taken seriously. Payson hadn't qualified fourth for anything since the disastrous first day at Worlds last year. She made up for lost ground during finals for that competition, and Austin was certain that she could do it again.

While Austin was thinking about Payson on the gold medal podium, she was obviously thinking about someone else being there. "Lo was amazing today, wasn't she? I think that was the best she's ever done it."

"There was a lot of that going around today." It was actually rather amazing. So many athletes tanked when they got to the Olympics because the pressure was too much, but the American women had the day of their lives. "Your floor, Lauren's beam, Kelly's vault. You were all amazing."

Payson frowned and he could tell where her mind jumped to. Kelly had the vault of her life today, and it had knocked Kaylie out of the event finals. It was probably the reason Kelly landed in the All Around, too. She only beat Kaylie out by five hundredths of a point, and her normal vault scores wouldn't have gotten her there.

"How is Kaylie doing, anyway?" Payson asked, concern coloring her voice. "I can't imagine how hard this is for her."

Guilt washed over Austin in waves. "I don't know. I haven't left your side since you fell asleep on me back at the arena." He should have checked on Kaylie. He loved her once, but he had never been fair to her. He chose Payson over her all of those months ago and he was doing it again now.

Payson turned her head away, refusing to meet his eyes. "She's had a horrible day and I'm about to make it worse. What I did was necessary and I'm not sorry I did it, but I wish I could make it hurt less for them."

"They will forgive you," he promised. "They love you too much not to."

"I hope you're right… I shouldn't put this off any longer. If I wait I'll lose my nerve."

He cast a critical eye over her. "You can wait long enough to take a shower and get comfortable again." She was still wearing her competition attire. She fell asleep on Sasha's shoulder before they even made it to the locker room, so Austin had carried her back to the Village while the other girls changed at the arena. He'd been on vigil for the last hour and a half while she slept, sitting silently on the bed across from her, watching her breathe. "Come on, I'll help you get to the bathroom."

She leaned against him as they walked the short distance to the bathroom and then allowed him to remove the pins from her hair and take it down. A healthy Payson would never have consented to being babied like this.

It took her longer to take off her makeup than it would probably take her to shower. For what was probably the millionth time in his life, Austin felt grateful that he was a guy. They didn't need to mess with crap like make up. Payson had to use what smelled like rubbing alcohol to get all that gunk off her face.

"Are you going to be okay in there by yourself?" he asked, worried that she might pass out and hit her head or something.

She stopped in the middle of taking off her leo. "Are you offering to take a shower with me, Austin?"

"Yes."

"Well then, let me ask you a question. How hard are you working right now not to look at my boobs?"

Busted. It was hard not to be distracted when she was standing in front of him with her leo bunched around her waist. "Pretty damn hard."

She put her hands on her hips, which pushed her chest forward a little bit farther, and the battle was lost. He had to look. "This is exactly why you're staying on _this_ side of the shower curtain," she said. "If you get in there with me this turns into something else, and if I'm too tired to have sex lying down then I'm sure as hell too tired to have sex standing up. You are keeping your clothes on and your pants zipped up."

"Fine," he grumbled. "I'll stay out here." Then he smirked and asked, "Can I at least watch?"

He was trying to make her laugh and all he got was an eye roll and a droll, "Sure. If watching me wash my hair five times to get the hairspray out turns you on, then go ahead and watch."

As it turned out, that did turn him on. He felt a little sleazy leaning against the wall watching her shower, but it was hot as hell. She was right, it would have turned into something else. If he was in that shower he would already be buried balls deep within her, and it took all of his willpower not to step in there and fulfill that particular desire. The words _she is too sick for sex_ were running through his head like a mantra, and they were the only thing keeping him from following his instincts.

She noticed his condition when she stepped out of the shower. Her eyes flickered down to his pants and then back up, but she chose to ignore it. She leaned back over the edge of the tub to wring out her hair, and the new angle did all kinds of delicious things to her body. She wasn't ignoring it, he realized. She was teasing him.

She wrapped a towel around herself and she was such a picture of innocence that he thought maybe he was wrong. Maybe she just didn't realize what it did to him when she leaned over the tub like that, or when she—Christ—bent over to pick her clothes up off the floor. She was still relatively inexperienced in the realm of sex, so it was completely possible that she was oblivious to the response she evoked in him.

Then she proved that she knew exactly what she was doing. She pressed herself as close to him as the bundle of clothes in her arm would allow, and kissed the living daylights out of him. When she pulled away from the kiss he was too dazzled to notice what she was doing, so when his head cleared and he realized that her hand was brushing against the front of his jeans and her breath was hot against his ear, he nearly had a heart attack.

"I'm sorry this is so _hard_ for you. I wish I could help—" She sucked on his ear lobe in the most obscene, suggestive way possible. "—But I'm just so, so tired."

She placed a hot, wet kiss to his neck and then walked away, leaving him too stunned to move. She was a brazen hussy. When some of the blood finally returned to his brain he followed her, barely cognizant enough to hope that nobody was in the hallway to see him or, rather, to see his very obvious erection.

When he walked into her room she was lying on the bed, towel nowhere in sight. "How quiet can you be?" she asked.

"I thought you were too tired?"

She raised a challenging eyebrow. "The shower woke me up."

Oh, hell yes.

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><p>AN: So, Austin listed four possible reasons for that first kiss this chapter, and one of them is the truth. Which one do you think it is? Also, did anyone figure out happened that made Payson snap back into herself?

I haven't responded to reviews in a long time because I'm trying to concentrate on writing, but that doesn't mean that you should stop leaving them :) I almost always respond eventually. And, happily, I am writing again. If I can keep this up for a little while longer I'll be able to go back to posting every other day :D


	39. Chapter 39

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

A/N: My picks for the men's gymnastics Olympic team- Dannel Leyva, John Orozco, Jonathan Horton, Jake Dalton, and Steven Legendre. And yes, that is the same Steven and Jake from this story :)

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><p>Sasha wanted to be with Payson. He was trying to act like he didn't, but it was obvious. The first thing he did when they got back was to check on her, and he stayed watching her for longer than he really should have, but he was too good of a coach to ignore his responsibilities the rest of the team. He spoke with Emily, Kelly, and Lauren as a group, said what an amazing job they had done and how proud he was of them, and then went to speak with Kaylie.<p>

When he sent Emily in to speak with Kaylie she expected him to leave, but he didn't. He was still there when the two girls emerged from the bedroom, sitting with Lauren and Kelly and having a casual conversation. Sasha had always been close with his team, and the five of them had an enjoyable time chatting together, but Emily knew why he was hanging around. He was waiting for Payson.

He wanted to go back to her bedroom. The jiggling of his knee gave him away, indicating that he wanted to be up and moving instead of talking to them. She assumed that he was trying to give Austin some privacy, since the younger man had spent little time with his girlfriend since she got sick, but it wouldn't last long. If Payson didn't come out soon Emily was sure that Sasha would go to her.

He was about to snap when Payson and Austin finally emerged from the bedroom holding hands. He sprang from his seat like a jack-in-the-box, but refrained from walking over to her. Their greeting was, as usual, enigmatic. Those two had a language of their own, and nobody else seemed to know the translation. He raised an eyebrow and she shrugged one shoulder, saying, "I stole it."

Austin kissed Payson and left, and she asked, "Where are Andy and Beth?"

Andy and Beth were living in what had been termed (but not by their team) the alternate apartment. The female alternates from several different sports were all housed in the same apartment, but since the women's gymnastics team considered their alternates to be very much a part of the team, Andy and Beth spent most of their free time with the other five girls. It was unusual for them not to be there. "They're back at their place," Emily answered. "I think it's a little hard for them to be around us right now, while we're all celebrating."

Payson grimaced but said, "It's better that way, anyway. I need to talk to you guys alone."

Sasha seemed to comprehend more in that statement than Emily did, because he asked, "Are you sure?"

"I'm sure. They deserve to know."

Payson's words sounded dire, and Emily was getting nervous. She could see on her teammates' faces that they were, too. Except for Kelly. She seemed surprised but not worried.

Sasha strode to Payson and hugged her, and they had a short whispered conversation before he kissed her and left. Emily waited until the door shut behind him to start asking questions, but Kelly beat her to it. As soon as the door clicked closed she asked, "Did you just have sex with Austin?"

Payson blushed scarlet. "Crap, could you hear us? We were trying to be really quiet."

Emily saw her shock and horror reflected in Kaylie and Lauren's faces. Shock because she couldn't believe that Payson had been having sex while they were all sitting in the living room, and horror because she couldn't believe that Payson and Kelly were talking about it like that. They were both painfully blunt, and it was a million times worse when they were together.

"Don't worry," Kelly said, "We couldn't hear. It's just that you got out of the shower a while ago, and when you didn't come back out I figured you must be screwing. I don't get it though. Why now? Why not at least wait until tonight?"

Payson came to take Sasha's abandoned spot on the couch. "For pretty much the same reason I always have sex with Austin. I was trying to distract myself from something else."

"And that something else would be telling them the truth," Kelly deduced, scrutinizing Payson's face, looking for some unknown detail in the expression.

"The truth about what?" Kaylie asked, surprising Emily with her forwardness. Usually it was Lauren who asked those kinds of questions.

Payson seemed to shrink in front of them. She was already drowning in one of Austin's t-shirts, but she somehow managed to look even smaller. "The truth about a lot of things," she said. "I've been lying to you guys, a lot, and I'm afraid that you'll hate me for it."

She was scared. Emily reached over and took her hand, offering her support for whatever it was that was upsetting her, and saying, "We could never hate you, Payson, no matter what you've done. What do you want to tell us?"

Payson sobbed and clutched at Emily's hand, leaving nail marks in her palm. "That day at the Rock, when Austin flipped out, it wasn't because I told him I was sick. It was because I told him I was pregnant."

The only sound in the room was Payson's sobs. Emily wanted to break the silence of her team, but she didn't know what to say. Payson was pregnant. _Payson was pregnant_. Or was she? "Did you… are you still…"

Payson didn't need to hear the rest of the question to answer. She nodded and said, "Nine weeks, on the dot. We're keeping him."

"Nine weeks? But you said you slept with him the night before all of that happened." Kaylie's voice had a far off quality to it, like she wasn't there with them. She was struggling with this as much as Emily was.

"I lied," Payson choked out. The collar of her shirt was soaked with tears. "It was all a lie. We were never dating and I'm not in love with him. I never was. We got drunk at Nationals and hooked up, and Austin didn't even remember it."

There was a part of her that recognized the bitterness in Payson's response, a part of her that was angry about the lies, and a part of her that wanted to comfort her very upset friend. But the part of her that had control of her mouth had just realized something. "That's why you changed the Rufolva in your beam."

It was a completely inappropriate thing to say in the moment and all of her teammates were staring at her. Somehow the knowledge that she had said something so stupid made her snap out of the stupor she was in. "Oh God, Pay, I'm so sorry." She hugged her friend, who clung to her like a lifeline. "You surprised me, is all. Are you okay?"

"As long as you don't hate me I am. I'm happy about the baby now, really. I mean, I'm scared as hell, but I'm still happy." She didn't look happy. Her nose was running and tears were coursing down her cheeks, and she was still pale from being sick. Emily wondered if Payson's illness was the result of her pregnancy, but that was a question for later.

Lauren spoke for the first time. "I don't understand, why did you lie? Don't you trust us?"

Payson's lip quivered in response to Lauren's hurt tone. "I do. I trust you with my life, but I was scared and confused. At first I didn't know if I was going to keep him, and then I didn't know if I would even make it through the Olympics without having a miscarriage, and I just _couldn't_ deal with anything else. It's not that I didn't trust you. I just wasn't ready for you to know."

"What changed?" Kaylie asked. "Why are you telling us now?"

Payson sniffled and wiped her face. "I couldn't lie to you guys anymore. You're my family. Austin… Austin said that I haven't been acting like myself since I found out, and if I had been I would have told you from the start. I didn't really see it at first, but I think maybe he's right."

"I don't understand. You said you weren't with Austin, but he's obviously a big part of your life, and you just…" Lauren never shied away from talking about sex, but even she couldn't bring herself to finish that sentence.

"It's complicated. _Really_ complicated," she admitted. "At first I just wanted to have sex, to forget how messed up everything was for a little while."

If Payson had been looking for casual sex then Austin was right, she really hadn't been herself. She continued, "But we've had to deal with so much together, freaking out about whether Alex would be okay with me sick, and whether I would even live through this, that things changed. I'm not sure where we stand anymore. I care about him, a lot, but I don't want to be with him. I can forgive him for what happened that night in St. Louis, but I will _never_ be able to forget it."

There was so much to comprehend in that explanation, too much, so Emily stuck with something simple. "Alex?"

Payson smiled and there it was, that happiness that she had mentioned earlier. She really was happy about the baby. "Alex if it's a boy; Aly if it's a girl. I think it will be a boy, though."

Whoa. She had a name picked out. That made it all so much more real. Payson was going to be a mother. "Is 'I'm happy for you' the right sentiment here?"

Payson half-laughed, half-cried. "Definitely the right sentiment. You don't hate me?"

"We would _never_ hate you, Pay," Lauren said, reaching out for Payson's hand. "And you didn't do anything to deserve hate, anyway. Keeping this a secret doesn't hold a candle to the things that I've done and you've forgiven me for every one of them. We're here for you, whatever you need."

Kaylie added her hand. "Yeah, you can't get rid of us that easily. Like you said, we're family. This baby is going to have a lot of aunts."

Payson broke down again, presumably from relief, and they all gathered around to give her support. When she was able to calm down, she explained everything to them. She told her story from start to finish, and showed them a picture of her ultrasound. Emily was still in shock; she was sure the other girls were, too, but they meant what they said. Payson was family, and they would do anything to support and protect her.

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><p>AN: So the girls know now. And the question from the a/n in the last chapter kind of got answered. The reason behind the kiss was that she really does care about him now, she's just really confused about it. She knows she feels something, but she's not sure what.

New question: What did "I stole it" mean?

I need some review love.


	40. Chapter 40

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

A/N: Okay, so there is a really hilarious reason that this is posted late. I got suspended from the site for posting explicit material. Isn't that funny? So Cat and Mouse and Of Love and Trucks aren't here anymore, but I'm bouncing over to LiveJournal to create a site where I can post them. I'll be sure to let you know if I post something new on that site so ya'll can head over to look at it.

You know how I said a while back that I was worried that posting the chapters spread out would make Payson seem like a slut rather than someone who was just really, really confused? This is where that comes into play. Payson and Sasha are about to have a REALLY frank discussion.

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><p>When someone knocked on the door at 9 p.m., Sasha assumed that something bad had happened. That was the way things had gone lately, so he wasn't surprised to see Kelly on the other side of the door. She was biting her lip and shifting her weight from foot to foot.<p>

"You said to come get you if Payson got worse," she said, which confused the hell out of him because he'd never said that. "She got all pale again and she's shaking and… well, she's really kinda freaking us out. Can you come check to make sure she's not, you know, dying or anything?"

"Yeah, let me grab my key." He slipped into the bedroom he shared with Marty and grabbed the key out of his jacket pocket. He was teetering on the edge of panic, but he was kept calm by a niggling suspicion that Kelly was lying about Payson's condition. She was speaking a little too loudly, like she wanted his flatmates to hear, and her apparent unease didn't reach her eyes. Something else was going on.

His suspicion was validated as soon as the door closed behind him. After just a few steps Kelly muttered, "She's totally fine, by the way."

"And you're a horrible actress," he told her. "Why am I coming to your flat if she's fine?"

"Because Payson is a horrible actress, too. She wants you there but she won't say so."

When they entered the girls' apartment, Kelly said a cheerful goodnight and walked away without another word. He disapproved of her behavior, but that didn't stop him from taking advantage of the excuse. He knocked on Payson's door.

She called for him to come in and he opened the door to a dark room. She was already in bed. He flipped the light on and observed her, still wearing his t-shirt and levering herself to a sitting position. She had her sonogram taped to the wall beside her.

"What are you doing here?" she asked. Apparently Kelly didn't inform Payson of her plan.

"Kelly just knocked on my door and said that you were sick again and I should come check on you to 'make sure you aren't dying or anything.' You don't look like you're dying to me." He was grinning, but Payson looked confused.

"I'm fine and I don't have a clue why Kelly would say that."

He chuckled and moved to sit beside her on the bed. "I do. She was giving me an excuse to come see you."

He watched as comprehension drew on her and her eyes lit up. She looped her arms around his shoulders and leaned against him. "Are you staying for the night?"

"I can if you want me to," he said, kissing her forehead.

She kissed his lips in response and said, "I definitely want you to. Get into bed."

He was rather hampered by the fact that she was clinging to him and had her head buried into the curve of his neck, but he managed to untangle himself long enough to undress. He turned off the light and climbed into bed with her; she didn't hesitate to situate herself on top of him.

His hand settled on her hip and he groaned. She'd taken off the pair of shorts she was wearing earlier and the baggy t-shirt she stole from him had ridden up over her hips. The only thing separating his hand from her skin was a very brief pair of panties.

He felt the heat of her blush against his bare chest. "I'm sorry," she said. "I forgot what I was wearing."

"Don't worry about it, love. I'll deal. I'm wearing less than you, anyway."

She propped herself up so that she could see his face in the dim light. The movement shifted her body beneath his hand so that instead of her hip he was now grasping her ass, and he couldn't stop his fingers from clenching in reaction to the change. Above him, her eyes fluttered shut and a tight groan escaped from the back of her throat.

It was his turn to apologize. "No, I get it," she insisted. "Involuntary reaction."

She forced her eyes open to meet his. "Seriously, Sasha, I can put on shorts. It would probably make this a lot easier for both of us."

"I don't want you to change for me, Payson." He was talking about more than just her clothes and she knew it. "I don't want you to ever do something different than you normally would just because I'm around."

"Are you sure?"

Like she had the night before, he lifted his head and placed a hot kiss to the column of her throat. A memory flashed through his mind of Marty saying that he had his hand on Payson's ass and she was sucking on his neck. He couldn't help but smile at the current situation. His hand _was_ on her ass, but this time it Payson whose neck was being sucked. He pushed the thought away and said, "I'm sure."

She settled on top of him again and rested her head above his heart. "Do you think we'll ever be able to sleep together without an awkward sexual moment?" she asked. He could hear her smile without needing to see it.

"Are you planning to make this a common occurrence?"

"Yes."

He chuckled and she hummed her approval of the rumbling in his chest. It was such a Payson thing to say. No explanations, no conditions, just a simple yes like it was the most normal thing in the world for them to sleep together. He hitched her closer and whispered, "Go to sleep, love. We'll worry about the next time when it gets here."

She did go to sleep, and he followed soon after. His last waking thought was that he could spend the rest of his life in Payson's bed, and maybe he should be worried about that.

o-O-o

The first thing he noticed upon waking was that he was spooned against Payson. The second thing he noticed was that he was hard as a rock. The third thing was the exact position of his hands.

One of his hands had slid beneath her shirt during the night and worked its way up to cup her breast. He noted the soft skin and heavy weight, the perfect way that her flesh filled his hand, and the rasp of her hard nipple against the pad of his thumb as he stroked it.

His other hand was in an even more perilous position. His arm was snaked under her and curled around her lower abdomen, and his fingertips were brushing the skin beneath the waistband of her panties. It would be so easy to slide his hand down a few more inches and bury his fingers in the warmth that he had so far only felt through the barrier of clothing.

His hand was already moving south when reality came crashing down on him. He froze when realization dawned that he was feeling up Payson in her sleep. What would happen if she woke up now, while he had one hand up her shirt and the other down the front of her underwear? It was a complete and total violation of her trust.

He decamped from his current position as quickly as he could without waking her. He pulled away but her body followed, attempting to settle back into its normal place on top of him. This was a disaster.

What was he going to do? He couldn't sleep with her anymore, that much was clear. And he would have to be honest about what had happened, and more importantly what had _almost_ happened. He didn't lie to Payson, and she would never accept that they couldn't sleep together anymore without an honest explanation.

He had to get out of the bed right now, but he couldn't go back to his flat without hurting and confusing Payson. She expected him to be there when she woke up. He couldn't walk down the hall in his current condition, anyway, and it showed no signs of going away on its own. He looked at the clock. 4:30. Good, he'd have time to take care of the problem before anyone was awake. He threw on his clothes and headed to the bathroom.

He tried to imagine the NGO's reaction if he was caught wanking in an apartment full of teenage girls. That fallout would probably be worse than if he was caught doing what he almost just did with Payson.

He was torn. He knew that it would be wrong to think about Payson while he masturbated, but he needed to be fast or risk getting caught. The fastest way to get off would be to imagine finishing what he had just started with her. If he was completely honest with himself, Payson had been foremost in his thoughts every time he wanked for the last year. He settled for his usual denial. He would think about her and then pretend later that he hadn't.

He let his mind wander. His imagination was far more vivid than it used to be due to firsthand experience. There wasn't a single part of her body that he hadn't seen except her breasts, and he'd just had an up close and personal experience with them. He knew what her skin tasted like, he knew how she felt against him, and he knew the fire that could burn within her. His last thought before he fell over the edge was to wonder if that was all he knew. There was a real possibility that they had done something in their sleep that he didn't remember.

He sat on the other bed when he came back into her bedroom. He didn't think that he should be touching her right now. He could borrow her laptop and get some work done, but he chose instead to brood on all of the potential ways that he could ruin their relationship with the upcoming discussion.

She woke earlier than he expected. It was only half past five and she didn't have to be up until six. She sat up in bed confused. "What are you doing all the way over there?"

For the first time since they were in Romania, he couldn't meet her eyes. "I thought it was best that I get out of the bed."

"Sasha, you're scaring me," she said, climbing out of her bed and on to his. "What's wrong?"

She turned his head so that he couldn't look away from her and he saw the worry in her eyes. "I don't think we can sleep in the same bed anymore, Payson. I woke up about an hour ago and… we were in a compromising position, to put it mildly."

"Oh, geez. What was I doing?"

Despite all of his trepidation, he smiled. It figured that she would think she was the one to cross a line. Of the two of them she was more physical, which said quite a lot. "You weren't doing anything," he admitted. "But I was doing a whole hell of a lot."

She didn't seem concerned. "Define a whole hell of a lot."

"I was groping your breasts with one hand and sliding the other one beneath your underwear." He was talking to Payson, so he didn't bother being delicate. She preferred the cold, hard truth.

A faint blush covered her cheeks. "Well, I don't think that can all be attributed to you. I'm pretty sure that I _put_ your hands there at some point during the night. I thought I dreamed it."

"That's the problem, love. When we're asleep we act on instinct and we don't even realize that what we're doing is real. Or worse, when we first wake up we're aware of our actions but don't think about the consequences. You have no idea how close I came to—" He broke off, unwilling to say the words. Payson deserved to know, but he was having a hard time admitting what he almost did.

"To what? To fingering me? Big fucking deal."

He stared at her with his mouth hanging open, surprised by both her crass language and the crass thought. She crawled so that she was straddling him and pressed her forehead against his. "I don't care, Sasha. I don't care what you almost did and I wouldn't have cared if you did it. You're the best thing in my life right now and I don't want to lose that."

There was desperation in all her manner, which is probably where the crude exclamation stemmed from. She thought that this would drive them apart. "I don't want to lose it either, love, which is why we can't keep sleeping together. I don't want to screw this up by doing something stupid while we're in bed."

"It's not what you did last night that's screwing things up," she said, pulling back from him. "It's how your acting now. You're trying to make my decisions for me. _I_ don't want to stop sleeping with you. You keep saying that you don't want me to change for you, but that's what you're asking me to do now. You're asking me to stop needing you and I can't do that."

His heart clenched at her words. "You need me?"

"Of course I do, you idiot," she said, tilting her forehead back against his. "You're the only thing keeping me together right now. Austin said that something changed in me the last few days, that brought me back to myself, and I know exactly when that happened. Do you?"

He shook his head no.

"It was the night before we left Boulder, the first time that you got into bed with me. I let down walls that I'd built up since the night I got pregnant, walls that I thought were protecting me but were really just hurting me. I would never have been brave enough to do that without you."

They were so close that her tears were running down his face. He hated that he made her cry. "I want to give you what you need, Pay, but I don't want to hurt you while I'm doing it. I have no idea what we did last night. Can you honestly rule that out as a possibility?"

She sat back and her body rocked against his in a way that would have turned him on if he wasn't so distressed. "I can rule out sex hands down," she said, considering the situation. "That definitely didn't happen. But anything else, no, I can't rule it out. But I don't care, Sasha. I don't care what we do in our sleep."

"It's not just in our sleep, Payson." He slammed his eyes shut, unable to look at her. He didn't mean to say that, didn't mean to open that can of worms. It was a secret he planned to take to the grave with him, but it just slipped out, and she was not going to let it slide. She would persist until he came clean with her.

"Open your eyes," she ordered. He followed her command out of sheer instinct. "Now tell me what's wrong. You aren't allowed to castigate yourself unless I know _exactly_ why you think you deserve it."

He hadn't been to confession since he was a little boy, but that was exactly what this felt like. Scared to confess his sins, looking for absolution but terrified of condemnation. Only now he had the added fear of losing the most important person in his life.

She stroked her knuckles down the side of his face. "There is nothing you could say that would break us, Sasha. I promise."

She wouldn't let this go, he knew. She would make him confess, and she always wanted the brutal truth. He had to tell her. He closed his eyes and let his secret tumble out, the secret that he'd been keeping even from himself. "I think about you when I masturbate."

He expected horror or disgust, and the same judgment that he inflicted upon himself. What he did not expect was soft laughter. He opened his eyes when he felt her nose brush against his, and their lashes tangled together. "That's what you're freaking out about?"

"Isn't that enough?" he asked with fond exasperation. He would never understand the way her mind worked. She should hate him for this.

"It's normal for you to think about me. I think about you. In fact, I didn't even start masturbating until I met you. We have to have some kind of outlet for our attraction. Like we talked about before, we can't just stop the way our bodies react to one another. Masturbation is a healthy way to deal with that." For a woman who was a virgin until a month ago, she had an incredibly liberal view on sex. She didn't care if they fooled around in their sleep or if he got off thinking about her, nor did she have any reservations admitting that she got off thinking about him. What was Kim teaching her daughters?

"Should I be worried that you seem to have no limits about sex?"

She wound her arms around his neck and pulled herself closer. "I have limits, Sasha, just not with you. I trust you with my life, and my heart, and my child's life, so why shouldn't I trust you with my body, too? I know that you would never take advantage of me, and I know that you would never risk our relationship by pushing for something that I wasn't willing to give. I'm not trying to turn this into some kind of twisted friends with benefits relationship, but if we lose control once or twice, I'm not worried. We can handle it."

"What makes you so sure?" he asked. He wasn't so certain that their relationship could withstand the pressure of a slip up, and he didn't want to risk that.

"I'm sure because it's us. We're strong enough together to overcome anything that could happen. Look, I'll prove it."

She pressed her lips to his, but it was different from their normal kisses. She wanted to take this farther. When her tongue swept against his he let his instincts take over. One hand fisted in her hair and the other moved to her ass, pulling her hips flush against his. Their bodies were pressed together from their lips all the way down to their thighs. He imagined they made for one hell of a sight when the door clicked open seconds later.

* * *

><p>AN: Uh oh.

So many of you guessed correctly on last chapter's question. She stole Sasha's t-shirt, and the girls just assumed that it was Austin's. We also just got to an earlier mystery, about what happened that made Payson come back to normal.

So Sasha keeps using the "I don't want you to change for me" line, and he's coming to it from a very innocent place, but he's just figured out that sometimes you have to make small concessions. He doesn't want Payson to ever have to stop and think about her actions around him, but the fact is that women and men in platonic relationships _do_ behave differently around each other, and they are no exception. Sometimes Payson just really does need to put on shorts.

Review and let me know what you think about the chapter, and I'm leaving the door wide open here. If you think I went way too far, tell me, because I'm still a little unsure myself. Or if you loved it, well, I always want to hear that :)


	41. Chapter 41

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

A/N: The livejournal is up at .com. I'm still in the process of posting C&M, but the first two chapters are up and so is Of Love and Trucks.

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><p>"Hey Payson, are you—"<p>

She wanted to finish her sentence, but the sight that greeted her made her forget how to speak. Payson was making out with Sasha. At least she hoped they were only making out, because she couldn't say for sure that they weren't having sex. With the position that they were in it was impossible to tell. Sasha was sitting on the side of the bed with Payson on top of him, and they were so close together that they were almost the same person. Payson's shirt was pooled around her thighs, making it obvious that she was not wearing her shorts but a little unclear if she was wearing anything at all. God, she hoped they were just making out.

"Emily," Payson started, but Emily didn't want to hear her excuses. She just wanted to get out of the room.

"Oh my God, I am so sorry. I'm just going to leave, and I'll make sure to knock next time." The words managed to sound calm, even though she was freaking out inside. She shut the door and walked away instead of covering her eyes and running away screaming like she wanted to.

She bet that if she looked in a mirror her face would be the color of a tomato. She had been in some pretty embarrassing situations in her life, but this was by far the worst. Her best friend making out with their coach was close to the top of the list of things she never, _ever_ wanted to see.

She tried to figure out if Payson and Sasha had been lying about the relationship or if this was a new development. She thought it must be new. Payson had been very open with them last night about the fact that she and Sasha were living together, so why would she be honest about that but hide a romantic relationship? And she was sleeping with Austin. Payson would never be involved with two men at once.

"Are you okay, Em? You're face is beet red."

Kaylie's concerned question pulled Emily out of her thoughts. She didn't even remember walking into the living room. If she had been paying attention to where she was headed she would have gone to her room instead, to avoid the questions of her friends. She didn't know how much, if anything, to share.

"Um, yeah, I'm fine. I just…" Unsure of what to say, she changed the subject. "Do you guys want to go down to breakfast?"

"We've been up for ten minutes," Lauren pointed out. "I haven't even showered yet. Are you sure you're okay?"

She was saved the trouble of answering that question when Payson appeared behind her. "That was not what it looked like, Emily."

"Then please tell me what it _was_," she begged, turning to face her friend, "Because, seriously no judging, but I don't know what to do with this information."

Payson pursed her lips in thought. "Why don't you tell me what you think is going on first, and then I can figure out where to start with my explanation."

"Well, I think you were just making out with Sasha," she said, stating the obvious, "And I really hope that's _all _you were doing. And I'm pretty sure this wasn't going on when you talked to us last night, so something must have happened between then and now."

"You were making out with Sasha?" Lauren asked, coming to stand beside Emily. "I totally saw that coming."

Payson glared at her friend. "We were not making out. We were kissing, and I was just trying to prove a point."

"And the point was what, that you're completely hot for him?"

"Not helping, Lauren," Emily said, trying to regain control of the situation. "She's right, though. What point could you possibly prove by kissing him?"

Payson sighed and moved to sit down beside Kelly, who was ignoring the whole situation. "I'm glad you know that I wasn't lying about our relationship, but I think maybe you need some backstory." She waited until Emily and Lauren sat down with her to continue. "There is nothing going on between Sasha and I other than a really close friendship… but we are both attracted to each other. We talked about it and agreed not to let it affect our relationship. But this morning Sasha was freaking out because when he woke up we were in a 'compromising position.'"

The use of air quotes indicated that the words were Sasha's rather than Payson's, but there was something missing in the story. "You were sleeping in the same bed?"

"Yeah. We're used to spending a lot of time alone and we can't do that here," Payson explained, "so sleeping together gives us a chance to just be together for a while, like we would do during the evenings at home."

Nobody bothered to mention how weird that was, because there were more pressing issues to be addressed. Kaylie, with her usual avid curiosity, asked, "Exactly how _compromising_ was your position?"

"Well, me lying on top of him while he has an erection doesn't even phase him, so use your imagination to figure out just how bad it had to be to make him freak out."

Emily couldn't stop her mind from conjuring that image, even though she didn't want to think about it, and the picture her head came up with was pretty damn bad. She hoped it wasn't that bad in real life.

"Okay," Lauren drawled out, "I think there are some big things missing from that, but I'm following you so far. Horny plus same bed equals fooling around in your sleep. What I don't get is how that adds up to you kissing him."

Payson shrugged. "Like I said, I was trying to prove a point. He said that we couldn't sleep together anymore, which I was _not_ okay with, so I was trying to prove that we could deal with a slip up. I wanted to show him that there was nothing we could do that would screw us up."

Emily could almost see the logic in what Payson was saying, but she was still a little too caught up in what she saw to accept the explanation. "That explains the kissing part—sort of, in a really weird way—but why were you on top of him?"

Payson was earnestly confused. "I'm always on top of him. That's kind of the way we work. If you come to our apartment, ninety percent of the time I'm sprawled out across him."

"Well for future reference," Emily said, "It is not okay to straddle some guy while you aren't wearing pants." She needed to knock some sense into her friend somehow.

Payson scrunched her nose in consternation. "I don't even think about stuff like that with him. I mean, we've had some pretty intense sexual moments, but the way we were sitting, that's not sexual to us. It's just normal."

Kelly, who had been reading the newspaper without seeming to listen to the conversation, broke her silence. "Really, Payson, just fuck him already."

"I'm not fucking anyone but Austin anytime soon," was Payson's nonchalant answer. She didn't seem bothered by Kelly's less than polite statement. "Attraction and love aren't the same thing, Kelly, and even though I don't think a slip up would ruin us, I'm not going to turn the most important relationship in my life into friends with benefits. It's not healthy."

Emily didn't think what Payson was doing with Austin was healthy, either, but she wasn't going to bring another problem into the already messy conversation. Lauren spoke. "Are you sure you're not in love with him, Pay? Because what you're describing sounds a lot like love to me."

"It is love," Payson agreed, "But not the kind of love you're talking about. He's just family."

Kaylie said the thing that Emily really wanted to say but wasn't brave enough. "I don't go around making out with members of my family."

Kaylie shrank back under Payson's baleful gaze. "We were _not_ making out."

"Was there tongue?" Lauren asked.

Payson hesitated, because the answer would not support her case. "Fine, yes."

"Then you were making out."

Payson muttered under her breath and Emily was, unfortunately, close enough to hear it. "It's still a lot better than what we were doing last night."

Kelly, with all of her usual subtlety, asked, "So what exactly _were_ you doing last night?"

Payson turned scarlet. She should know by now that muttered statements are always heard. "I didn't tell Sasha," she said, "So I'm certainly not going to tell you."

"What do you mean you didn't tell Sasha?" Emily asked. "Doesn't he know?"

"No, and he's not going to," Payson insisted. "He doesn't remember and he doesn't know that I do. It would only freak him out."

Lauren took that as bait. "So, what is it that he doesn't remember doing?"

"I'm going to take a shower," Payson said, completely avoiding the question. "Sasha and I have to leave earlier than you do, so I need to get ready."

Kaylie waited until Payson was out of the room before she leaned forward and whispered, "What do you think they did?"

"I don't know," Emily answered, "and I don't want to know." It was bad enough to see them kissing. It was worse to conjure up images of the way they woke up together. Knowing exactly what they did in their sleep would be too much for her to handle.

"Well I do," claimed Lauren. "Do you think they had sex?"

Kelly put her paper down and engaged in the conversation. "Do you really think they could have sex and he wouldn't remember it? That's a lot of movement, a lot of rearranging clothes, and a lot of mess for him to not know that it happened."

Lauren ceded the point and moved on to the next suggestion. Emily could tell that they were about to launch into a discussion of the likelihood of several different scenarios, and she didn't want to hear it. She got up and left, and hoped that the conversation would be over by the time she came back.

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><p>AN: I haven't proofed this because I'm in a hurry, so let me know if there were any mistakes so I can fix them.

Review, please :) And _what_ did they do? Btw, the story doesn't ever say, so the only way you'll find out is to review and I'll tell you if you're right ;)

I'm off to some wedding festivities… (my best friend, not me)


	42. Chapter 42

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

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><p>Kim found Payson and Sasha easily enough when she walked into the medical office building attached to the hospital. They were sitting together in the waiting room, a little closer than they probably should be in public. She should really talk to them about that.<p>

Payson, leaning into Sasha's chest and looking up at him as they spoke, didn't notice her come in, but Sasha did. He lifted one hand to signal her over, but he didn't remove his other arm from around Payson's shoulder.

When she reached them Payson stood to hug her. "I'm so proud of you, sweetie," she said. "You were amazing yesterday."

"Thanks, mom. I just hope that I can do as well tomorrow for the team." Payson sat back in her chair and Sasha slung his arm around her shoulders again. It was still hard for her to accept, but Kim understood more and more why her daughter wanted to stay with Sasha. They were so comfortable with each other, and seemed to draw so much strength from one another. Right now Sasha was doing all of the taking care, but Mark was right. Under normal circumstances they took care of each other.

It was nice to spend a little bit of time with her daughter, despite the circumstances. The U.S. gymnastics team was not allowed to socialize outside of the village as a general rule, so the only time Kim had seen Payson since they arrived in London had been in the hospital. The plan today was that Sasha would come with Payson to the hospital and take her back to the training facility when they were done, but if she needed to stay for treatment he would leave her with Kim and go to the gym alone. She knew that he would rather stay with Payson no matter the circumstances, but he had responsibilities to the rest of the team.

They took Payson back to run some labs and left Kim and Sasha in a private room. She took the opportunity to ask Sasha how her daughter was _really_ doing.

"Better than I expected," he said. "She had a rough time getting through qualifying, but she bounced back. She was fine last night and she seems okay so far today. But then again, she didn't start really going downhill last week until about Wednesday, so I don't know how long this will last."

"I'm so scared for her," she admitted. For the past two days she'd been hearing Payson's voice like an echo in her head. _If my red blood cells die, then so do I_. It was haunting her. "I don't know how you're staying so calm."

"Honestly, Kim, I'm doing the mental equivalent of covering my ears and humming. I can't deal with the truth, so I've completely blocked it out." This surprised Kim, yet somehow made her feel better. She thought Sasha was being so strong and she was being weak. In an odd way it helped to know that Sasha was weak, too.

"I'm surprised by how little media fallout there is," she said, making a blatant attempt to change the subject. "I thought they would be all over this, but the commentators barely even mentioned it."

Sasha snorted. "That's because MJ bribed them. She's spent years building up a cache of favors owed, and she's called in half of them in the last three days."

"I guess we owe her a lot then," she said, frowning. She didn't want Payson to be indebted to MJ Martin.

"No you don't. She's suing Ellen Beals and the paper that published that doping rubbish for libel. She'll make millions, for her and for Payson."

Kim didn't know how to respond. She wasn't comfortable with MJ profiting from her daughter's misfortune, but she did want Ellen Beals to be held responsible. What she did was detestable, and she deserved to be punished for it. There would be a criminal trial, of course, but that didn't guarantee a guilty verdict or even a fair punishment if she was found guilty. A civil case would ensure at least some retribution.

It didn't take long for Payson to get back from the test lab. She told them that it would be a while before they got any results back, and Dr. Clarke would come talk to them then.

"Sasha," Kim said, "Could you give us some time alone, please? I'd like to speak with Payson."

He looked to Payson for permission. She kissed him and whispered, "I'll text you when we're finished."

It was one of the things she needed to talk about. "Payson, sweetie, you should be more careful. _I_ know there is nothing going on between you and Sasha, but the rest of the world doesn't know that. The two of you act a lot like a couple."

She grimaced. "I know. I'll try. It's just hard to be one way in private and another way in public. It's all silly anyway. There's nothing wrong with the way we act."

"There's not, but you know all too well how quickly things get blown out of proportion. I'm not saying change everything, just maybe don't _touch_ so much. Keep a little distance between you." That was the main problem. The kissing people could blow off as quirky affection, but it was hard to look past the way that sat or stood together.

"Got it," Payson said with a nod. "Start a personal space bubble. We can do that. But that's not really why you wanted to talk to me, is it?"

Payson was a very intuitive young woman. There was much more on Kim's mind than her daughter's behavior toward her coach. "How are you doing? And I don't just mean physically. How are you handling all of this?"

"Well, physically I'm exhausted. I've been sleeping a lot, and that helps, and my body seems to have stayed on Mountain Time so I'm throwing up in the morning instead of the middle of the night, which also helps. But I'm still really tired. Not so much where my body feels heavy anymore, though. More just like I don't have enough energy." She took a long pause, probably to collect her thoughts, and continued, "Otherwise, I'm just… trying not to think about it. Luckily I have a lot to distract me right now."

Kim smiled at her daughter's droll tone. "It can't be that easy, though, Pay. You have to be scared."

"I am," she said. Fear and pain flashed across her face for a brief second before disappearing again. "But probably not in the way you think. I'm afraid of dying, but it's the other stuff that's worse for me. I'm scared that I'll let my team down, which I know is stupid but it's still there. I'm scared that I won't be able to carry Alex to term or that he'll be sick because of what's happening to me. I'm scared of leaving Austin to raise Alex on his own. I'm scared that Sasha won't get over it if I die."

Kim knew, at least on some level, that Payson was feeling these things, but the last one threw her for a loop. "What do you mean, about Sasha?"

"It took him years to move on after Amelia died, and I'm—" She cut herself off and started again. "I'm so much more to him than just his gymnast. I don't know if he would ever recover if something happened to me."

She thought there was something more to the statement, but she didn't press. She knew from experience that if Payson didn't want to talk about something, there was no way to make her. She had other issues she needed to address. "And Austin? How are things with him?"

Payson raised an eyebrow. "Do you have a checklist of things to ask me while Sasha's out of the room?"

"Yes." They had a lot of things to discuss and not a lot of time, so she'd thought long and hard about what she needed to ask.

"Okay then," Payson said, accepting the situation. "Things with Austin are… better. Much better. We haven't talked about it—we will soon though—but I think we're at a point now where we can really work together to raise our son. I don't think there will be contention between us."

Kim asked the question she didn't really want the answer to. "Are you still…"

"Sleeping together?" Payson didn't shy away from the topic at all. "Yes. But it's different now. It's more like a real relationship, one that you would normally see between people our age, where we care about each other a lot but don't expect it to be forever. At least, that's what it is for me."

"But you said you haven't talked to him about it?"

She shook her head. "No. We haven't had time. But I think it's the same for him. Okay, what's next on your list?"

Payson could be amazingly flippant for someone who had the weight of the world on their shoulders. "Hmm… We still haven't talked about your living situation. Did you make a decision?"

"Yes," she said, guilt etched across her face. Kim would bet her house that Payson made that decision a week ago and never told her. "I'm staying with Sasha. We're going to move out of the apartment and get a house."

Kim wasn't surprised by the answer. "I thought as much. Although, I thought you'd be renting a bigger apartment rather than a house."

Payson averted her eyes. "We're not renting."

"Not renting?" Kim's brain took longer than usual to process the information, but when it did the acceptance she'd worked all week to build went flying out the window. "You're _buying_ a house together? What happened to this not being a permanent arrangement?"

"It's not," she protested. "Not in the long run. It's just an investment instead of throwing away our money on rent. Look, I know we don't ever talk about the money stuff, but you know I have millions. So does Sasha. Buying a house is not a big deal for us."

"I don't care how much money you have, buying a house is still a big deal. It's _house_, Payson, not a pair of shoes."

Payson blanked her. "Mom, I got paid more than your house costs from wearing that Tiffany Lock necklace when we landed at Heathrow. I get six figures for every event that I'm photographed at wearing Louboutins, not to mention the money I'm already getting paid for being there. I made five million dollars in one day when I did that Chanel commercial. So for all intents and purposes, buying a house might as well be buying a pair of shoes for me."

She hated thinking about the money that Payson made and she tended to forget about it. It was uncomfortable and surreal that her daughter was a millionaire. She had a valid point, though. Buying a house wouldn't even make a dent in Payson's bank account, or in Sasha's—though he didn't have nearly as much money as her daughter did. Payson was the biggest thing to hit sports since David Beckham. Actually, she was bigger than Beckham thanks to her being female and gorgeous.

Kim covered her face with her hands and leaned back against the wall. "Payson, I don't know how to deal with this. With any of it. The money, the celebrity, Austin, Sasha, the baby, _this_." She waved her hand around to indicate the doctor's office.

"Mom, I think you need to stop expecting me to be a normal teenager," she said, laying a comforting hand on her mom's arm. "I'm not. I never have been, even before all the media blow up after Worlds. Sasha is the most normal thing in my life right now, and I need that. If you saw us together at home you would understand."

She remembered the morning after Payson got out of the hospital, how she found Payson and Sasha on the couch together and looking so natural. That image had been one of the driving forces in her growing acceptance of the situation, and it was weighing on her mind right now. Sasha made Payson happy, and she made him happy as well, so what right did Kim have to condemn that? Payson deserved some peace of mind right now.

"I'll work on it," Kim promised. "That's the best I can do right now, but I will try to accept this."

* * *

><p>AN: So I did some digging around about the money stuff, and those numbers are real. Kind of a tribute to how crazy the world is today, right? All said and done, Payson made about 30 million dollars since Worlds. She's loaded.

So I've been writing AND responding to reviews today. I'm on _fire_ ;) Lol. So you should send some new reviews my way to inspire me even more :D


	43. Chapter 43

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

A/N: Since I missed the last update (I was involved in a lot of wedding stuff at the time), this is going to be the length of a couple of chapters. It's a bit choppy, because the first bit really should have gone in the last chapter, but I didn't realize that at the time ;)

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><p>Sasha was so glad that he had a smart phone. Otherwise he would be bored out of his bloody mind waiting for Kim to finish talking to Payson. He would also have nothing to distract him from the fact that he was separated from Payson, however temporarily, and he hated that.<p>

He was being ridiculous. He just couldn't shake the fear from this morning of losing her. Other than the awkwardness of Emily walking in on them, she'd made a spectacular point. If their relationship could withstand the intimacy of that kiss, which felt an awful lot like they were drowning in each other, it could withstand anything. They'd talked about it in depth during the drive to the hospital and come to an understanding (they seemed to be doing that a lot lately) and he knew nothing had changed between them. Still, the primal fear of losing her was there, and it grew with each passing moment that he couldn't see her. He was relieved when his phone buzzed with her text message.

_U can come back now_

_Fyi I told her we r buying a house. Shes not happy_

He didn't want to upset Kim with their plans, but he wasn't going to change them either. After three weeks of living with Payson he wasn't sure if he could ever go back to living alone. He hated the first two nights he spent in the Village because missed having Payson in the next room. They'd agreed that he couldn't sleep with her that night for the sake of appearances, and he already knew he wouldn't be getting any sleep alone. The arrangement would be that he and Austin would alternate night watching out for Payson, with Sasha taking the nights before Austin had to compete. He wasn't entirely happy with that plan, mainly because it meant he would spend three nights in a row without Payson, but it would take the attention off of them and give Payson and Austin some much needed time together.

When he came back into the room with them, Payson situated herself in a way that even Sasha knew was a bad idea. She sat so that she was more in his chair than her own, with her legs thrown over his and her arms wrapped around his torso while she leaned against him. If they weren't in a private room the position would cause a stir. Even Kim, who was incredibly tolerant of Payson's tendency to glue herself to him, didn't look pleased. Of course, Kim was already upset with them about the house, so that could have something to do with her expression. It probably also had something to do with why Payson was draped on top of him. She was looking for comfort.

Dr. Clarke didn't comment on their position when he finally came in, nor did Payson move. Both acted as if nothing was out of the ordinary while they discussed Payson's test results. Her red blood cell count was down, but not enough to warrant a transfusion. Based on her previous rate of deterioration a transfusion was ordered for Wednesday, the day before the All Around. The timing was a coincidence, but it would put her at best strength for the most important event of the Olympics.

Sasha was worried about her ability to make it through the team final, though, and apparently so was Dr. Clarke. He administered a B-complex injection, which he said should give her a slight increase in energy to carry her through to Wednesday. The time that it took for the doctor to give her that shot was the only time during the appointment for which Payson detached herself from him.

As soon as they were in the car and on their way to the practice gym she said, "I'm sorry I'm mauling you today." Of course, she didn't stop doing it, but she did apologize.

"I don't mind at all, love," he assured her. "Are you upset about your mum?"

She hesitated before she answered. "Not really, no. I expected that reaction, and I think she'll accept it in the long run. It's just _everything_."

She didn't need to explain what that meant. The Olympics were overwhelming. The baby was overwhelming. Her illness was overwhelming. When you put them all together, Sasha wasn't sure how she was even coping. Most people would have broken down a long time ago.

He lifted her chin so that she was looking up at him and promised with his eyes that he would never leave her, no matter how bad things got. He pressed his lips to hers and was surprised when her mouth opened slightly beneath his own. He didn't question when her tongue nudged against his lips; he just gave her what she needed.

In the thirty two years of his life, he had never experienced anything like that kiss. As kisses went, it was relatively chaste, but it carried so much of Payson's fear and hope and confusion. She wasn't looking for comfort; she was filling a desperate need to share her pain with someone who understood. It was the single most emotional experience of his life.

Her eyes were glistening when she pulled away. "I'm sorry. I'm not going to make a habit of that. I just needed…"

"You don't have to explain, Payson. I understand."

"I need you to promise me something," she said, fisting her hand in his shirt. "Promise me that if I die, you'll keep going. Keep coaching; keep being there for the girls; keep _living_."

He held on to her tight, unable to let her go, physically or hypothetically. He whispered into her hair, "You're not going to die, Payson."

"We don't know that for sure. _Please_, Sasha. I need to know that you'll be okay without me."

"I'll try." It was the most he could promise. He wasn't sure if he could recover from Payson's death, but he still had Lauren, Emily, and Kaylie to look after, and possibly Alex. If the worst happened, he would try for them.

Payson sobbed and laughed in one breath. "See, this is where I could use one of those awkward sexual moments to distract me."

He chuckled. She could make light of even the worst situation. "Do you want me to engineer one?" he asked.

"I don't think even you could manage to make this moment hot," she said. It was true. Payson could dance naked in front of him and he wouldn't be aroused, not while his heart was breaking like this.

They were silent for the rest of the short ride, drawing strength from each other as they sat curled in the back seat. When the car stopped in front of the training center, he wasn't sure if he should be sad that their time alone was over or happy that they would have a distraction from their pain for a few hours. He settled for a combination of both.

o-O-o

Coming into the Olympics, the U.S. Men were expected to take the bronze. After their outstanding first day of competition, hope was raised that they would win silver. Nobody expected them to win gold.

They were second going into the final rotation. Austin knew that was largely thanks to him. It wasn't conceit; it was numbers. His team was good, but he'd outscored the competition on four of the five apparatuses they'd competed on so far. He hadn't competed so well since the day he shocked the world by winning All Around gold as a nineteen year old underdog.

He was ready to shock them again.

"I can do this, Kevin."

He was having a whispered conversation with his coach while they adjusted the parallel bars for his height. "It's too risky, Austin. I can't let you do a routine I've never seen before."

"Look, we can't win gold with my normal routine." He'd done the math, and even with his best execution score of the night they wouldn't beat China unless he used his upgrades. "But if I do this we win. China's already finished their vault rotation, so they can't compensate for my score. It's the perfect upset."

"But if you fall we're off the podium altogether," Kevin argued.

Their time was up. Austin walked with Kevin to the stairs as he said, "I won't fall. I can do this."

Kevin paused for the briefest moment before descending the stairs. Austin doubted that anyone in the arena saw his nod, but it was there. He gave Austin permission to win.

He looked to where Payson was sitting in the stands and smiled. He mouthed "this is for you" and she mouthed back "I'm so proud of you." They'd been having these conversations across the arena for the past two days of competition and his teammates made fun of him for it, but he didn't care. It meant the world to him to know that Payson cared about him, even if it wasn't in the way he hoped for.

He didn't visualize his dismount like he normally did before he competed; he thought about Payson instead. He replayed their last moments together before the competition, which had motivated each performance so far. She'd been upset but was trying to be brave for him, and tears dropped from her eyes while they stood with their foreheads pressed together. "I don't regret it," she said. "I don't regret any of it."

It was his greatest fear, that he'd ruined her life that night. Hearing her say that she didn't regret it was like lifting a stone from atop his chest; he could breathe again. She kissed him and then pulled away to look him in the eyes. "Now go win gold."

He was going to, for her.

He got the green light and saluted, ready to astound. It was the hardest parallel bars routine in the world, harder than Tanaka's by three tenths of a point. As he worked though his swings and releases he imagined the reactions in the stadium. The Japanese coach would be staring in shock, realizing that Tanaka suddenly had a new contender for gold. Tanaka himself was competing on rings and wouldn't even notice. The Chinese team would be on the edge of their seats, hoping he fell and feeling guilty about it. His own team would be cheering like crazy as it sank in that they were going to win gold. Sasha would have a smug expression on his face because he was the only person who knew about this routine. They had worked on it before Austin got kicked out of the Rock. Payson would be furious that he was doing something so dangerous.

That was his primary thought as he stuck his landing. Payson would be pissed. And then she would be proud. And then she would be pissed again. The back and forth could continue all night.

He glanced to the stands and saw her mouth the blood chilling words "I'm going to kill you." She turned to Sasha and, even though he couldn't see her face, Austin knew exactly what she was saying. She was threatening his life as well for keeping the secret.

The medal ceremony went by in a blur. It was always that way for him; he remembered miniscule details about the competition but had only the vaguest idea of what happened afterward. He knew that he posed for hundreds of pictures with his team and spoke with dozens of reporters, but it wasn't until he was speaking with Andrea Joyce from Universal Sports that he snapped back into reality. Or, rather, he was shoved back into reality.

The floor had opened up and the women came down to congratulate their male counterparts, but Payson wasn't in a congratulatory spirit. She ran to him and shoved hard against his shoulder. "How could you do something so stupid? I was terrified!"

She didn't seem to notice the news camera, and Austin wasn't paying it much attention, either. He slipped his arm around her waist and pulled her closer. "Now you know how I feel every time you get on the uneven bars. Your routine is _way_ more dangerous than mine was."

He was partly joking and partly serious. Payson's bars scared the shit out of him. "That's different, Austin. I practice those skills every day. You haven't done that routine once since we got here. You could have killed yourself."

"So your performance on parallel bars wasn't planned?"

Andrea's question threw him off guard, because he'd forgotten she was there. "Uhh, no, not exactly. I had it prepared beforehand, but I hadn't planned on using it unless it was absolutely necessary. But I saw how close we were to China and, well, Payson said before the competition to go win gold, so I did."

"Don't blame that act of idiocy on me," she cried, pushing him again. "I'd rather have you alive than a gold medalist. You scared the hell out of me."

She was scolding him, but he could hear the note of panic behind her anger. He really had scared her. He knew she would be mad at him, but he didn't think about how frightened she would be for him, or the consequences for her if he had seriously injured himself. His body didn't just belong to him anymore; it belonged to Payson and Alex as well.

He cupped her cheek and rested his forehead against hers. "I'm sorry, Pay. I swear, I would never have done it if I wasn't sure I could pull it off. I'm sorry I scared you." He pressed an apologetic kiss against her lips and wasn't surprised when she deepened it and slid her hand up to his neck. He could feel her desperation.

"How long have the two of you been dating?"

Damn it all, why didn't this woman leave them the fuck alone? Couldn't she take a hint and go away? He tried to keep the frustration out of his voice when he said, "I'm sorry, Andrea, but could we postpone this interview for five or ten minutes? I'd like some time with my girlfriend."

She smiled and agreed like everything was normal and she hadn't been invading their privacy. He wanted to take her microphone and chuck it across the stadium. As the reporter walked away Payson mumbled in his ear. "Our agents are going to kill us for that."

"I don't care," he said. He picked her up and spun her around, and when he sat her back on the ground she kept her arms looped around his neck. "I really am sorry I scared you. I didn't realize how that would make you feel."

"Well if you ever do something like that again, I will kill you myself. I'm already planning to kill Sasha for putting that routine together and Kevin for letting you do it."

He kissed her again to clear the frown from her face. "I meant what I said before. I did it for you. I wanted to win gold for you."

He took off his medal and placed it around Payson's neck instead. A week ago she would have protested such a display, but now she accepted it for what it was: an acknowledgment that he couldn't have done it without her. She lifted on her toes to kiss him, an acknowledgment on her part that their relationship was real now.

She pulled away and smiled up at him. "I really am proud of you," she said. "Still angry, but proud. The men haven't had a team gold since eighty-four, and you made that happen tonight."

"_You_ made that happen. I haven't competed that well since Beijing and it was because you were here supporting me."

The kiss that followed was smoldering, and the only thing that kept it from flaming into passion was presence of dozens of cameras and hundreds of people on the floor around them. He was seriously considering going back to the Village to be alone with her. Then the fire that was building between them was doused by the sudden presence of a microphone in front of their faces.

He would never cease to be amazed by the gall of reporters. Nothing was sacred to them. "Austin Tucker, what can you tell us about your win here tonight?"

He slung his arm around Payson's shoulder and she slipped hers around his waist. If the dick from ESPN could act like there was nothing unusual about shoving a camera and a microphone in front of a couple while they were kissing, so could they. Payson swiped her thumb across his lips to clear away the lip gloss she'd left there.

"I'm very proud of what we've accomplished here tonight. Team USA is really strong this year and I'm glad we got a chance to show that to the world." It was the standard press release BS.

"Many people are giving you credit for this win. How do you feel about that?"

He felt that they were right, but he couldn't say that out loud. "I'm honored by the sentiment, but it's not true. No one person can win a team gold. My parallel bars set us over the top because it was the last score to count. It could just as easily been Max's pommel horse or Nick's rings, or any one of the outstanding routines we saw from the U.S. tonight. We couldn't have won without the hard work and dedication of every member of the team."

"I see that Payson is wearing your gold medal. Tell us about that." At least it was a novel question, although it probably wouldn't stay novel.

"I couldn't have performed the way I did tonight without Payson's support. The medal belongs to her just as much as it belongs to me."

He moved the microphone in front of Payson. "Payson, do you feel that you deserve Austin's medal?"

She ignored the incredible rudeness of the question. She also ignored the microphone. Instead, she smiled up at Austin and said, "I think he is giving me way too much credit, but I understand how he feels because his support has meant the world to me as well."

"You've been having some health problems lately. How are you doing now?" The guy was on a roll for being a douchebag.

"I'm doing much better." Her smile was planted firmly on her face, but she was shutting him down. He'd have to be an idiot not to notice.

Apparently he was an idiot. "Not much is known to the public about your illness. What can you tell us about it?"

Her smile never wavered as she quoted MJ's prepared statement. "It's a rare disease that affects my blood. I was born with it and we are treating it effectively."

The reporter finally seemed to realize that he wasn't going to get anything else and retreated. He was replaced by another. They moved closer to the exit with each interview, all of which were nearly identical. Some reporters caught on to the freeze out and gave up and some pushed harder. Every one asked personal questions to them both.

When they reached the edge of the tunnel they sneaked away. Sasha met them by the locker room and arranged for transport back to the village, and Payson was asleep as soon as they were in the car.

o-O-o

She was exhausted when he carried her to her room and put her to bed, so he was surprised when she woke a few hours later wanting to make love. The heat that burned between them in the arena was still there, and she was fiery and aggressive. He experienced a new side of her every time they made love.

They laid together in a sweaty tangle of limbs while Payson peppered kisses across his chest. She chuckled as she laid her head over his heart. "This was probably a bad idea the night before finals."

It hadn't occurred to him. Sometimes she acted so well that it was easy to forget that she was sick. He shouldn't have allowed this. "I'm sorry, Pay, I didn't even think about that."

She chuckled again. "I was probably making it hard for you to think about anything. But don't apologize. I needed this."

"Pay, what's happening between us?" This was not the best time to ask, but he needed to know. "This feels real now. Is it?"

"It is." She shifted so that she was looking up at him. "It's real in the same way that your relationship with Kaylie was real. I care about you so much, and I'm glad that you're Alex's father, but this isn't forever, at least not the romantic part of it. Can you be okay with that?"

Her question gave him pause. Could he be okay with that? Could he handle really having her and then losing that? "I… I don't know. I don't understand. Why do this at all if it's not going to last?"

"Someday, when Alex is old enough to wonder about us, I want to be able to tell him about a time when we were happy together. I think that I can do that now. I think that I can really be with you and enjoy the time we have as a couple, even knowing that it will end. Almost all relationships at our age do end. The only difference is that we know it will, so it won't come as a surprise."

"Do you think there is any chance at all that it could work for us?" he asked, stroking his fingers along her cheekbone. He didn't try to hide the desperation in his voice.

She turned her head to kiss his palm and leaned into his touch. "I want to say yes, Austin. I want to say yes so badly."

He knew what she wasn't saying. "You want to say yes but you can't." He drew her in for a kiss and rested his forehead against hers. "I won't push you, Pay, I promise. It will be hard when we end this, but I'll let you go. I won't ask for something you can't give."

She kissed him again, and they made their promises with actions instead of words, but before things could go too far she pulled away. "I need to tell you something. If this is real then I don't want to keep secrets from you." She paused to draw breath and said, "I've been sleeping with Sasha. Not in the sexual way, but we've been sleeping in the same bed."

Austin was at a loss for words. There were so many questions and emotions associated with that sentence that he didn't know where to start. His mouth decided for him. "Why?"

"Comfort. Security. Maybe addiction."

"Addiction?" Comfort and security he understood, but addiction confused him.

She linked their fingers together as if to prove a point. "Addiction to touch. I feel like I'm going to fly apart if I don't have something holding me together, or someone. I need an anchor."

"And Sasha anchors you better than I do." It wasn't a question. It wasn't even an accusation. It was a truth that he couldn't ignore.

"I'm sorry."

She didn't need to apologize, because he'd already come to terms with that a while ago. Sasha connected to her in a way that Austin never could and he'd learned to accept it. There were some things, however, that he could not accept. "Has anything happened between you?"

She raised herself on her elbow to see him better. "I'd be lying if I said no, but the answer's not really yes, either. We've had moments, but we've never consciously acted on them and we're not going to. I've kissed him, but it wasn't romantic or sexual."

From any other woman he wouldn't believe that a kiss could be platonic, but it made sense with Payson. The way she expressed herself was always through physical touch, and she'd been through enough lately to need an outlet outside of normal bounds. There was something else that concerned him far more. "What do you mean, not consciously?"

"It's harder to control our actions when we're asleep." She was not apologetic, but she didn't try to defend her actions, either. She just accepted them for what they were.

"I won't share you, Payson. "

"I know, and I'm not asking you to," she said. "I promise, as long as we're together I am one hundred percent yours. I won't stop sleeping with him, but you know that's not sexual for me, and everything else will stop. I'll be completely committed to you."

He believed her, and he wanted to accept what she was offering, but not unless it was what she really wanted. He didn't know if it was. "Are you sure you want to do this? I want to be with you, but I don't want you to get hurt because of it. You obviously have feelings for Sasha and this will affect that. Is that a change you can live with?"

Austin hated the idea of losing her to Sasha, but he wanted her to be happy. If Sasha made her happy, he didn't want to be the one to stand in the way of that. It was a concession that he could never have made a few weeks ago, but he and Payson had both grown so much since they found out about the pregnancy. The Austin Tucker who would rather see her unhappy than happy with someone else was gone, as was the Payson Keeler who would use him without a second thought to his pain. They would both make sacrifices for the other now.

"The feelings that Sasha and I have for each other are not the same as the feelings I have for you. They're strong, very strong, but not romantic. It's more of a mutual need to take care of each other, a partnership in life. With you it's different. I can't even explain it, but I don't want to be with Sasha the same way that I want to be with you."

He didn't understand, but words were not the way that Payson best expressed herself, so he said, "Show me."

She did, and he understood what her body was telling him better than what her words had. She was showing him—not quite love, but something close, and a devotion that would last the rest of their lives, long after their passion had faded away. And he knew, as they fell apart looking in each other's eyes, that she was right; the romance would not last forever. But what was left over would.

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><p>AN: So a lot of you have been asking about the nature of Payson and Austin's relationship and I've been hedging around the question because this chapter was pretty much the answer. The last paragraph pretty much defines their relationship now and where it will go in the future.

REVIEW! They make me happy and are inspiring, and since I'm making a big writing push on this story, I need plenty of inspiration :)


	44. Chapter 44

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

A/N: Oops, I forgot I was supposed to update tonight!

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><p>Payson was happy, and Sasha was happy because of it.<p>

They barely had any time alone together the day before, which he hated, but while they were waiting at the hospital they discussed her developing feelings for Austin and she said that she was going to talk to him about the possibility of a real relationship, but without the expectation of a long term commitment. Judging by the smile on her face and the way that she was leaning into Austin while they sat together on the bus, the conversation had gone well.

It was the best possible solution. The vague, undefined relationship that Payson and Austin had been engaging in was not healthy. It held too much potential for one or both of them to get hurt. It was clear that they cared for each other, and under normal circumstances the affection they felt would have led to a romantic relationship. But it would have been the kind of romance that teenagers and young adults typically have, where they feel passionately for each other for a few months and then drift apart. They would never have lasted.

They'd both grown and matured enough to accept that inevitability, and their current arrangement would build the foundation for a healthy relationship as cooperative parents. They needed and deserved a time of happiness together, a way to look back and not resent the events that had created their child. So they would be a couple, and learn to love one another, and let it go when the time came.

The downside to this was that as Payson spent more time with Austin, she would spend less time with Sasha. It wouldn't be so bad when they got home and were together all of the time, but the next two weeks would be hard. He was so used to having Payson around, and having time when they could just sit and talk, that he felt like something was missing when he didn't spend time with her. He was anxious for evening, when they could retreat to her bedroom and just be together.

Things would have to change, though, now that she was in a serious relationship with Austin. She'd made it clear the morning before that she did not want their sleeping arrangement to change no matter the circumstances, and he would respect that, but the moments of charged sexual tension couldn't happen anymore. They shouldn't have happened in the first place.

He had to stop thinking about this; they had finals to get through, and practice would be interesting. Payson would be taking it easy, to keep her energy for the team finals that night, and he was worried about how the team would deal with their star gymnast sitting out for the day. It could unnerve them, or it could inspire them to work harder. If they responded in the same way that they had at qualifications, they would take the world by storm.

He was somehow unsurprised to see MJ waiting in front of the training center. The beast had lain dormant for a week, and it was only a matter of time before she surfaced again. She'd been active behind the scenes, plotting, pulling strings, and making bribes, but so far she'd respected Payson's ban against marketing during the Olympics. It looked like that was over.

Austin and Sasha stood on either side of Payson as she approached MJ, ready to play interference if necessary. MJ could be subtle and conniving in one situation and brassy and aggressive in another, and if Sasha predicted right, this would be one of the brassy and aggressive situations. She was rarely subtle with Payson.

Payson was wary as she stopped in front of her agent. "I thought I said the Olympics were going to be about gymnastics, not media."

"You did, but you've proven that you're not capable of making good choices, so I've decided to ignore your decision."

"Wow, MJ, way to support your client," Payson said, sounding more annoyed than offended. "I'm so glad that I have you on my side."

MJ stood in front of them with her hands on her hips, exuding power and control. "I am on your side, love, which is why I've been working my ass off to correct your mistake."

"Watch it," Austin growled.

MJ smiled. "At least you're doing something right. Keep up the protective act; it looks great for the cameras. And your performance last night was brilliant. I couldn't have planned that better if I tried."

"It wasn't a performance, MJ, it was our life," Payson said. "I was scared."

They were starting to draw attention. The other athletes were sending surreptitious glances in their direction, and a couple of the men were trying to sneak closer and overhear the conversation. Sasha laid his hand on the small of MJ's back and whispered in her ear. "You're making a scene. I don't think that fits into your plan."

"Right. Let's move this inside, shall we?" MJ didn't wait for an agreement. She turned around and strode into the gym without a second glance.

She was tapping her toe on the floor when they trailed in behind her. The other athletes went to work, thanks in part to the women interfering with the men's spying. Sasha loved his girls. They were so protective of each other.

He motioned toward the trainer's room, indicating that they head there for some privacy, and Payson stopped Austin before he could follow. She slid her hands to his neck and kissed him before saying, "Go work out, babe. You've missed enough practice for me already. MJ doesn't bite."

Actually, she did bite, but that was information that nobody in the room needed to know.

Austin resisted, but as Sasha well knew, Payson was a very persuasive person. Once she convinced him to work out while she spoke with MJ, Sasha indicated for Marty to run the practice and the three of them retreated to the trainer's room.

MJ turned to Payson as soon as the door was closed behind them. "I can't keep up with you, love. You hated Austin, and then you got along with him, and now you're calling him babe and kissing him? I thought all that for the cameras last night was an act."

"Well it wasn't," she said with a sigh. "No matter what our romantic relationship is, we're still having a baby together and I want him to be safe. That bars set was not safe. Besides, I thought you would be pissed about that, blowing off the media."

"Why would I be angry? It was bloody inspired. Everything you did was perfect. You scolding him, him giving you his medal, the way you couldn't keep your hands off each other. Everybody is talking about it. You're the 'it couple' of the Olympic Games. Take a look at these." She pulled a stack of tabloids and papers out of her bag and handed them to Payson.

Sasha looked over her shoulder as she flipped though them. They all had pictures of her and Austin, some of them kissing, others of them walking together through the crowds, one picture that managed to capture Austin as he placed his medal around Payson's neck. They had hokey headlines like "The Golden Couple," "Heart of Gold," and "Love on the Olympic Podium." He saw their names thrown together as Paystin several times, and one newspaper claimed to tell "the heart wrenching story of how Austin gave Payson the strength to fight her life threatening illness."

He couldn't help but roll his eyes. He knew the media attention was exactly what Payson needed, but seriously, _Paystin_? It was ridiculous.

"Okay," said Payson, looking up from the papers. "This is good. Stupid, but good. So why were you just bitching at me?"

Sasha snorted. It was a minor miracle that those two hadn't gotten into a cat fight yet. Both could be abrasive when they wanted to be, and for some reason they always chose to be so around each other. He almost thought it was a game, because they didn't do it when things were serious. They just liked to play _Who Can be the Bigger Bitch?_

"This isn't enough," MJ snapped. So far she was winning the contest. "When people realize you're pregnant, being a cute couple won't cut it. We need to get rid of the good girl image and make you into a sex symbol."

Payson collapsed onto the training table with a sigh. "MJ, the only reason I even care about what people think is because I want to coach. Getting pregnant ruins my reputation, but wouldn't this do the same thing? Parents don't want their daughters training with a sex symbol."

"We're not going to put you on the cover of Playboy, Payson. We just need to move away from the idea that you're a little girl. When America's Sweetheart gets pregnant it's a scandal; when a sexy socialite gets pregnant it's gossip. You're going to have trouble as a coach no matter what, but without the scandal there will be room to work. There will be a few people willing to work with you because you're the best, and once you get a girl on the podium at Nationals people won't care that you got knocked up."

MJ was on a good run there until she used the phrase 'knocked up.' Now she was back in the bitch game.

Payson glared at her. "Fine, what do I need to do?"

"Well for starters, I've pulled some strings to get you the October cover for Cosmo."

"Wait," Payson said, interrupting MJ. "Don't they choose those covers months ahead of time?"

"They do. They've pushed off Jennifer Lawrence to a later date to open up a slot for you, and I had to call in a lot of favors to get it. I was hoping for the September issue, but it's already been sent to print." She looked offended by this, as if the publishers sent their magazine to print for no other reason than to upset her plans.

"Great," Payson deadpanned. "Now I'm the girl who messes with other people careers to promote my own. I've always wanted to be that bitchy. Who else am I screwing over?"

"Besides Austin, nobody." MJ was going to get bitch slapped, and Sasha was going to enjoy watching. She didn't seem to realize the danger she was in, though. "The Cosmo shoot is next Thursday. Before that you have a shoot for the Body Issue and after that a shoot and interview for Sports Illustrated."

Payson held up her hand to stop her agent. "Hold up. Did you just say the Body Issue?"

"Yes. They called a few weeks ago to ask but I was following your instructions of no publicity work until after the Olympics. When you got pregnant I took the liberty of agreeing without consulting you."

He had no idea what MJ was talking about, but apparently Payson did. "MJ, are you insane? You want me to do a nude photo shoot while I'm pregnant? What part of you thinks this is a good idea?"

He had to jump in. "You want her to pose nude? And this is supposed to protect her reputation how, exactly?"

"It's not porn, Sasha, it's a few very tasteful photographs published in a respectable magazine. It's through ESPN and several Olympians have done it. So keep your mouth shut." He bit back the protests he was about to make. The last thing he needed to do was piss of these two women by offering advice that they wouldn't listen to anyway. MJ turned to face Payson again. "This shoot is critical to my plans for you. Gymnasts are seen as children, and very often they look the part, like Kelly and Kaylie do, but you have a very womanly body. We have to take advantage of that. This photo shoot places you firmly in the realm of adults, which makes it much more socially acceptable for you to have a baby. And don't pretend like being pregnant is an excuse not to do it. You're not showing yet."

"What's the point, though?" Payson asked. "It doesn't come out until October, right? I _will_ be showing by then and the cat will be out of the bag, so why bother?"

MJ waved aside the question. "We're going to leak the photos long before that. Besides, don't make any assumptions about when people will realize you're pregnant. Stylists can do amazing things."

"Yeah, well I won't have a stylist when I'm working at the Rock. It'll just be a pair of maternity jeans and a t-shirt to cover my baby bump, so I'm pretty sure the parents are going to figure it out."

"We will control it, Payson," said MJ, laying her hand on Payson's shoulder in a rare act of support. "This won't be the end of the world. Lots of professional athletes overcome scandals like this and continue to have successful careers."

Payson stood and walked to the door. Before she opened it she said, "Obviously. You still have a great career and you've fucked everybody under the sun."

She left and MJ stood staring after her. Sasha laughed. Hard. And for a long time. Few people ever bested MJ Martin, and he was so glad he got to see it. Apparently Payson won their little game today; she was _definitely_ the bigger bitch.

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><p>AN: Oh, I love MJ. And I especially love putting her together with Payson so they can be snippy with each other.

I'm kinda sick today :( so you should totally leave me reviews to make me feel better. Reviews are the best kind of medicine.


	45. Chapter 45

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

A/N: The chapter is kind of short, but it's also one of my favorites :)

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><p>For some reason Austin couldn't fathom, the men's and women's teams hadn't associated much at these Games. They trained in the same gym every day, and they were at the arena to support each other during competition, but otherwise it was hard to tell that they were really all the same team. They rarely interacted, with Austin being the notable exception. He spoke with the girls as much, if not more, than he spoke with his male teammates.<p>

Today was different. Instead of congregating in two separate groups during lunch, with Payson and Austin making an awkward bridge in the middle, they were all sitting across the same mat and chatting while they ate. He could hazard a guess as to why; the alternates were no longer training with them, and the loss of the five athletes made their teams seem too small.

Payson was sitting between his legs and leaning against his chest while she ate. He drew a lot of heckling from his teammates for the less than manly act of eating off the same plate as his girlfriend, but he took it in stride. He was happier than he'd been in months, maybe years, so they could make fun all they wanted. He wasn't moving.

There were two general topics of discussion: the men's win the previous night, and the women's final this afternoon. The men's win had been a surprising upset, but the women were expected to take home gold. Barring catastrophe, they would. They were nearly four points ahead of China, their nearest competition, going into the finals. The lead was epic. Unfortunately the qualifying scores didn't count toward the medal, so they were starting from scratch, but there was no reason not to expect similar results that night. Austin had no doubt that by the end of the evening they would each have a gold medal. Payson would have two, since she was the owner of his team medal as well.

"Can you believe this is _finally_ happening, guys?" Kaylie asked, showing some of the spirit that made him fall for her, in the pre-Payson part of his life. "After everything we've been through, we're here, in the team finals at the Olympics, just like we always planned."

Emily smiled and he saw that fire in her, the one that made him so sure she would make it, even when she was floundering. These girls were going to rock the world tonight. "Yeah," she said, "but it's not exactly the way we planned, is it? There have been so many changes. Like, who would have ever thought that Payson would be an artistic gymnast?"

They all laughed, because a year ago that would have sounded insane. She was a power gymnast through and through, and nobody but Sasha saw the potential for grace in her.

"And who'd have ever thought we'd be _friends_ with Kelly Parker?" Payson asked.

"It's an Olympic miracle!" Kelly said, with a high pitched, sing-song voice. Austin had never seen her be so playful.

He noticed the mischievous glint in Lauren's eye before the others did and prepared himself for whatever outrageous things she was about to say, but she still shocked him when she asked, "Who would have _ever_ thought that Kaylie would be the only one of us still a virgin?"

Kaylie blushed scarlet and the other girls all burst out laughing. The men look gobsmacked; they weren't used to Lauren's brand of humor like he was. When Payson managed the rein in her laughter she said, "I kid you not, I have said the exact same thing before."

"Let's be honest," Kelly said, still chuckling, "We all thought it would be Payson. No offense, Pay."

She held up her hands in surrender. "Hey, none taken. I thought it would be me, too. I didn't see Austin coming."

"But you have now!"

He dropped his head down to Payson's shoulder as the girls catcalled. He wasn't sure if he should be mad, amused, or embarrassed. Payson threw a carrot at Lauren, who cried out when it hit her with an audible smack.

"You have a smutty mind, Lauren Tanner." Payson was pretending offense, but she couldn't keep the note of laughter out of her voice.

Jake's voice cut across the laughter. "Are you guys always like this?"

Austin lifted his head back off of Payson's shoulder and answered, "Yeah. Yeah, they really are. Sometimes they're worse."

"Men always think they have the market cornered on sex talk and heckling," Kelly said. "You have no idea what girls talk about when we're alone. We get _all_ the juicy details."

"I think you're missing the obvious fact that you're not alone here," said Nicky. He looked as uncomfortable as you can get. The guy had a giant stick up his ass, so he'd probably never gotten laid in his life. He'd probably never even thought about it; all he ever seemed to think about was gymnastics.

"Yeah, well, meet Lauren Tanner," Kaylie said, waving her hands like she was presenting Lauren to the room. "She has no social bounds. She'll say any_thing_, any_where_."

Lauren preened. "Damn straight. Social norms are stupid, so why should I follow them? I'm a free thinker."

Max was staring at Austin and Payson in horror. "You guys are sleeping together?"

The situation couldn't have been more awkward, because Max had once harbored a major crush on Payson _and_ on him. Max kissing him really hadn't affected their friendship at first, but things got tense around the house when it became obvious that Max didn't just kiss him because he was drunk. Austin didn't care that his friend was bi, but it was uncomfortable knowing that he was living with a guy who had feelings for him that he definitely did not return. When Payson broke up with him, Max left the gym and Boulder, and their friendship was a lot easier because of it. That might change though, now that Max was showing jealousy of his relationship with Payson. He might be jealous of him, he might be jealous of Payson, or he might be jealous of both. It was all too surreal for Austin's tastes.

It was too surreal for Payson's tastes, too, because she covered her face and said, "Can we please stop talking about my sex life? Lauren may have no social bounds, but I do, and this is embarrassing."

"No, you know what's embarrassing?" Kelly asked. "The moans I heard coming from your room last night. The walls are not that thick, guys, and I don't want to hear you screwing."

It was Payson's turn to blush scarlet. "Oh my gosh, stop! Let's just go back to talking about China and Russia's chances tonight. That conversation shouldn't embarrass anybody."

They did, but Austin couldn't help but notice the change in the group dynamic. Nicky looked uncomfortable, Max looked heartbroken, and Jake and Steven seemed to be reappraising Payson with the new information. All in all, he thought he might kill Lauren.

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><p>AN: I laughed so hard during the episode that Lauren said she couldn't believe Payson beat Kaylie to the cherry pop, because I'd already written this conversation. Also, the four point lead is real. It's what happened at the 2011 Worlds, where the U.S. woman decimated the competition :)

Leave reviews! :D


	46. Chapter 46

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

A/N: I give you the women's team finals :) Since the last chapter was a short one, this was is extra long. Also, just to tell you ahead of time, the DOD's for Emily and Genghi's bar routines are a mistake. They were supposed to be 7.1 and 7.2, but I put them in my spreadsheets wrong. I'd done some pretty intricate math based on that spreadsheet, so I just changed the numbers in here rather than re-doing all that math. So thier DODs are a little unrealistic.

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><p>"You can feel the excitement in the air here at the North Greenwich Arena in London, England, where we are about to start the biggest event of the Olympic Games. I'm Al Trautwig, with Olympic Gold medalist Tim Daggett and Elfie Schlegel, and this is the final of the women's gymnastics team competition. Elfie, what can you tell us about the chances for the U.S. women tonight?"<p>

"Well, Al, I think I can tell you that they're going to win. Team USA is hands down the best team at these Olympics, and I don't think the other teams will even give them a challenge. Would you agree, Tim?"

"Well, I think they have a very good shot tonight, but they have some stiff competition. China and Russia are the closest in the standings right now, but Romania is right there with them, looking for a spot on that podium."

"But they are leading by nearly four points, is that correct?"

"It is, Al, and that kind of lead is _huge_ in a sport like gymnastics, where winners are sometimes determined by hundredths of points. But they start with a clean slate tonight, so the other teams have a chance to catch up."

"Well, we're starting off in a strong event for them, the uneven bars. The American team will be in the same rotation as the Chinese team today, and China is up first. Elfie, what are China's chances against the U.S. team on this event?"

"Not good, Al. The American team has two gigantic start values, a 7.9 for Payson Keeler and a 7.4 for Emily Kmetko. Those kind of difficulty scores are unheard of. Many of you will remember Nastia Liukin's uneven bars routine from the 2008 Olympics had a start value of 7.7. Well, they've changed the scoring on this event since then to lower the start values, but Emily and Payson just soar right past the expected scores. There is only one other gymnast in the competition capable of competing with them is in this rotation, Genghi Cho of China, who has a start value of 7.5, but honestly, Emily is just better."

"The Rock Rebels, as they're called, are known for their high execution scores. Why is that, Tim? What makes them so much better than everybody else?"

"Well, it's all about the little things. You can see here with Jinnin Yao, there are moments when her toes aren't pointed, and a few small leg separations, and she doesn't always hit her handstands at twelve o'clock. That's pretty normal for a gymnast, even the best of them, but the girls from the Rock just don't make those mistakes. And that is all due to their coach, Sasha Belov."

"Now Sasha Belov, if his name sounds familiar to you, there is a reason why. He competed for England in the Sydney Olympics in 2000 and won four gold medals, a silver, and a bronze. Then he came back to the Athens Olympics as a coach for the Romanian women, which many believe to be the best team ever to compete in the Olympics. I think it is safe to say, though, that the American women have taken that slot now. What is it that makes Sasha Belov such a good coach?"

"Well, as you know, there has been a clamor in recent years to move gymnastics away from the difficult skills and back to artistry, but Sasha Belov embraces both. He encourages his gymnasts to perform the hardest skills they are capable of, but only if they can do so with perfect artistry. Payson Keeler said that he once made her do four hundred and forty three cartwheels in one day until he was satisfied with it. I'm not sure if she was joking about that number, but he certainly does expect perfection."

"Well, Elfie, we're starting off the competition for the American team here with Kelly Parker, who is their weakest performer on bars. You said earlier Payson and Emily are in a league of their own, so where does that put Kelly Parker?"

"Well, it puts her very close to the top, Al. Her start value is a 6.8, which is one of the more difficult routines you will see here tonight, but she doesn't have the execution of Payson or Emily, which knocked her out of contention for an individual medal on this event."

"The top eight girls in each event advance to the finals, with the chance for an Olympic medal, but only two athletes from each country are allowed to compete. That rule affects the U.S. more than any other country. Kelly was actually ranked number five in the world on this event, but she isn't allowed to compete in the finals because Payson and Emily are ranked higher than her. They have the same problem on beam, where Kaylie, Lauren, and Payson were all top eight; floor with Kaylie, Kelly, and Payson; vault with Lauren, Kaylie, Kelly, _and_ Payson; and the All Around, where Payson, Kelly, and Kaylie are ranked one, two, three, respectively. This kind of domination by one country is unheard of. It is possible, maybe even _probable_, for the U.S. to take the silver and gold in every event."

"And here's Kelly's score, 15.7, a very good score, but nowhere close to what we'll see from her teammates coming up."

"Emily Kmetko is up now, and she is always a crowd favorite on this event. Bars have always been her strength; she took home the silver on this event in her first international competition one year ago. You can expect to see huge things from her."

"Emily has a very interesting story. She'd never competed on a national or international level until last year's National Championships. A little more than a year ago she was training out of the YMCA in Fresno, California, and now she's competing at the Olympics with the expectation to win a team gold and silver on bars. She could not have come farther."

"We're coming up on her dismount, it's called a full in, back out, and it is very difficult. At Worlds last year she did this dismount in a tucked position, but she has upgraded it—oh, that was beautiful! As I was saying, you can see that she has upgraded it to the more difficult stretched position, which added a tenth to her start value. And it is gorgeous."

"Yes it is, Tim. Now up next we have Payson Keeler, who has been the story of these games. She has the highest start value ever seen in this event, but the attention around Payson has not just centered around her gymnastics. Elfie, tell us about that."

"Well, Al, Payson seems to be in the headlines everywhere. Three days ago she was publicly accused of blood doping, a prohibited method to enhance performance, but that rumor was quickly dispelled when she was rushed to the hospital that same day. It was revealed that Payson has been receiving blood transfusions for a life threatening medical condition, which is why she failed her drug test. She has sparked a buzz about whether or not she can compete or should even be allowed to, given her fragile medical state. The only thing being talked about more than her health problems at these Games is her highly publicized relationship with boyfriend Austin Tucker, who is expected to take home the All Around gold in the men's competition."

"I'm sorry to interrupt you, Elfie, but we have the scores back for Emily Kmetko. She scored a 16.5, an incredible score, but it's not enough to beat her biggest competition, Genghi Cho, who scored a 16.525. It will be a close race between them in the event finals."

"Now here's what we've all been waiting for, Payson Keeler up on bars."

"Payson, like all of her Rock teammates, is known for her precision, and the bars are a great place to see that. She doesn't make any mistakes on this event."

"She doesn't, Elfie, but her execution scores are high on every event. What makes her stand out so much on bars is her insanely high difficulty value. The skills that count toward her score are as high as you can get, and then she has a full point in connection bonuses. This pirouette sequence here, it adds six tenths of a point to her starting value."

"Tim, that release she just did always terrifies me. What is she doing there?"

"It should terrify you, Al, because it is the hardest release move in the code of points. That is a backwards swing into a forward salto over the bar, and she has made it even more difficult by piking the salto. She doesn't get any extra difficulty value for that pike, because the tucked release is already as high as you can get, but coach Sasha Belov doesn't allow her to do tucked skills."

"That's right, and that restriction had added a lot to her difficulty value, because piked and stretched skills are always worth more than a tuck. Here's the last example of that we'll see in her routine, a double double stretched, the hardest dismount in the code of points."

"Well Tim, Elfie, I don't know about you, but that routine looked perfect to me."

"It was, Al, but I'm sure the judges will find something to deduct for. She set a record on Sunday with a 17.25 on this event, so we'll see if she can do it again."

"She's set a lot of records, Tim. She has the highest starting score ever seen on three of the four events and she has set and broke several records for the highest _final_ scores in each of those events, as well. The only event she doesn't currently hold a record for is vault."

"But that's not to say that she isn't one of the best vaulters, Elfie. She's currently ranked number one in the standings. And here's her score for the uneven bars, a 17.375. A new record for Payson Keeler."

"That was an outstanding start for Team USA, with a two point lead over China at the end of the first rotation, while Russia and Romania are neck and neck for third place. It's shaping up to be a good night for USA Gymnastics."

o-O-o

"How are you doing?" he asked, careful not to speak too loudly or move his mouth too much. He was well aware that cameras were watching their every move.

She took off her grips and started to pack up her bag, bending down to disguise the conversation. "Well enough, at least for now. I'll be fine for beam, probably for floor."

"Vault?"

Payson cringed and answered, "We'll see. Lauren should be prepared, though."

He didn't want to hear it, but it was expected. They knew going in that she probably wouldn't make it through all four rotations. He wouldn't tell Lauren yet, though. He didn't want to psych her out for beam.

"Lauren, Kaylie, are you ready?"

"Yes, Sasha," the chorused. It made him smile. They hadn't responded to him like that in nearly a year, not since their team had become a family. He wasn't sure if it was a joke or if they were just so in the zone that they we doing it without thinking.

"C'mere." The two girls, along with Payson, gathered around him, and he reached out to squeeze their shoulders. "You three are the best beamers in the world. Know that. _Own_ it. We're two points ahead of China right now. If you go out there and do your routines like I know you can, we'll turn that lead into three points and _dominate_ the Olympics. Can you do that?"

"Yes, Sasha," they answered together. He smiled again and pulled them each in to drop a kiss on their heads. They all had a unique response to his affection. Kaylie grinned at him, Payson returned his kiss with a second one to his lips, and Lauren wrapped her arms around his torso in a hug that nearly crushed him.

When they moved to get ready he turned to Emily. He picked her up and twirled her around, saying, "I'm so proud of you. You were fantastic."

"I can't believe it's over," she said, smiling while she wiped away tears. "It's been such an amazing ride."

"It's not over yet, Emily. You still have event finals."

She waved a dismissive hand. "That doesn't matter; not like this does. This is what I wanted, the team."

He never failed to be amazed by Emily. Gymnastics was essentially an individual sport, and most gymnasts were only minimally concerned with a team medal, but not Emily. The team medal meant more to her than the All Around gold would to any other gymnast.

He really didn't want to burst her bubble. He lowered his voice and bent closer so that he couldn't be overheard. "Emily, don't…" He stopped, not knowing what to say. "It might not be over yet. You need to stay warm."

She understood what he wasn't able to say. There was no guarantee that Payson would be well enough to perform on floor, so Emily had to be prepared to take her place. She paled a little but nodded. "I won't let you down, Sasha. I won't let her down."

"You never could," he said, squeezing her shoulder like he'd done for the other girls. Then he was all business again. "Keep warm, but don't be obvious about it. I don't want China to know that we might not put Payson up."

They would be moving any second, so he had to be quick about talking to Kelly. She was standing with Marty, already discussing her floor routine, when he came to hug her. She had been difficult to coach since the beginning, and of the several different coaches she'd worked under Marty was the only one she really got along with, but she returned his hug whole heartedly. Something had changed in her since they arrived in London, and the result was a friendlier, more open, and all around happier Kelly Parker.

"You did a great job, Kelly. I'm so proud of you."

"Thanks," she said, smiling up at him, but she was perceptive enough to know that something was going on. She was also smart enough to conceal the conversation by arranging herself so that she was in a triangle with the two coaches and nobody else could see her face. "What's happening with Payson?"

"Nothing yet," he muttered, "but she doesn't think she'll make it all the way through, and she won't take a risk if she's unsure of herself."

Kelly surprised him with a brisk nod. "Good, she shouldn't. She knows we don't care about the medal, right? Not if it puts her or Alex in danger."

She was a bright girl. She knew better than to say 'the baby,' even though she was concealed. Sasha was surprised at her concern. He knew she would be supportive of Payson, but to say that she didn't care about the medal, that was huge.

"I'll be sure to tell her," he promised.

They got the signal to move and the girls headed across the arena to the balance beam. It was another event on which the U.S. was untouchable. Payson and Lauren had the two highest DODs in the world on beam, and Kaylie's 6.7 was nothing to sneeze at, either. They were all capable of huge execution scores, Payson and Lauren especially so. As long as none of them fell off the beam, they should increase their lead by at least a point, which gave them a little wiggle room if Payson couldn't finish out. Her DOD helped, but it wasn't so necessary that they couldn't win without it.

China was up first, as they would be on every event, so the girls had plenty of time to prepare themselves. They were all closed off in their own head, so they didn't notice when Lien Zhou fell off the beam. Twice. She was one of China's best beamers, and he'd never seen her fall in competition, but the stress was getting to her. Not the stress of competing in the Olympics, but the stress of being put into competition with the likes of Payson and Lauren, who could intimidate the best of performers with their skill.

He was glad that his girls didn't notice. It was easy to get cocky when your opponent fell, and cockiness led to mistakes. They couldn't afford that. They had a two point lead, which would probably be four points after Zhou's abysmal showing, but all it took was a few falls to lose that advantage.

Jinnin and Genghi both had solid beams, although certainly not their bests, and then it was time for his girls. Kaylie was up first. He remembered when he first came to the Rock, how childish her beam routine had been. She'd grown so much since then. She still had that same iconic smile, could still engage the crowd, but now that was coupled with harder skills and a more mature attitude. Where there had once been a little girl there was now a young woman. Of course, there was a difference between the _young woman_ that Kaylie was and the _woman_ that Payson was, but their routines reflected that. Kaylie knew her own capabilities and knew that it would be a mistake to try to replicate Payson's sensual choreography. Her current routine suited her perfectly.

It was beautiful. Almost perfect, even. It was a shame that she couldn't compete in the event finals, but Kaylie wasn't bothered by this one. Unlike floor and vault, where she would very likely have medaled, she didn't have a chance on beam. It would take a disaster for Lauren and Payson not to take the top two spots, and Ivanka was a shoo-in for bronze. The other qualifiers might as well not show up.

Her smile was brilliant as he picked her up. Whatever Emily said to her after qualifying had worked, because Kaylie seemed to be having the time of her life, despite not having made a single final. In a strange way it was the best thing that could have happened to her. She'd always had such high expectations for herself that she couldn't just enjoy the sport. Now, with the pressure of winning taken away, she could compete for the fun of it.

He had to set the board for Payson, so he gave her a quick "You were amazing" and bounded to the podium. The finals weren't the rush of madness that qualifying always was, because they catered more toward the television coverage, so he had a brief moment with Payson while they waited for Kaylie's score.

"Kelly said to make sure you knew that none of them cared about the medal." He couldn't keep his mouth from quirking up at the side when he said that. He loved that his team was so selfless.

Payson's eyes crinkled with her smile. "I know, and I love them for it. But we're going to win it anyway."

Kaylie's score came up, a very good 15.8. Payson called a congratulations down to Kaylie and then steadied herself to compete. When she got like this he couldn't even tell that she was sick. It was likely that the competition couldn't tell either.

His gymnasts almost never got E-scores below a 9.0, so their totals were sky-high. This was especially true for Payson. Her 8.8 execution score during qualifying was the lowest she'd scored on anything in nearly a year, and she'd lost a tenth for downgrading her dismount, but that was still higher than nearly every other player in the field. Tonight she would blow the competition out of the water.

She was flawless from start to finish. No balance checks, perfect lines, a mysterious smile on her face that she had cultivated specifically for this routine. She was enthralling. There were gymnasts on the floor and bars, but nobody was watching them. Their own teammates weren't even watching them. Every eye in the house was on Payson.

When she dismounted with the planned double front stretched, Sasha couldn't help but chuckle, because MJ told him that the commentators thought he would be mad about the change during qualifying since it broke his injunction against tucks in Payson's routines. It was ridiculous. He didn't let her do tucks, but did they really think that he would rather she clip her feet on the beam?

She jogged down the steps and he met her at the bottom with a kiss. "One more skill named after you, huh?"

"Yeah, I'm going for a record," she joked. It was actually true. She wasn't trying for the record, but that dismount was the sixth skill that would be named after, so she was tied with Nellie Kim for the most eponymous skills.

He had to go back up to set the board for Lauren, but he called over his shoulder, "Want to add something for the finals and pass Kim?"

She laughed and called back, "Yeah, lets add a quad twist on floor."

It was obviously a joke. Outside of that double Arabian, Payson didn't have anything higher than a two and a half, but he was sure that somebody would take her seriously and be expecting that quad twist by the floor finals next Tuesday.

Their banter, while entertaining in and of itself, was largely for the benefit of the cameras. Payson was a great actress. He could see all of the signs of exhaustion in her—the flatness in her eyes, the slight slump of her shoulders, the care with which she took each step, as if she was afraid of tripping—but to the rest of the world she would look fine. Her relaxed manner would hide the fact that she likely wouldn't finish out the competition, and it had the added benefit of putting their opponents on edge. China was already in third place behind Russia. Payson might rattle them right off the podium.

Lauren was lost in her own head, working her way through her routine, so Sasha didn't interrupt her. He readied the spring board and stepped aside, knowing that Lauren would come to him when she was ready. He could see the change in her eyes when she stopped visualizing. She turned to him and asked, "Famous last words?"

He shrugged his shoulder and phrased his answer as a question. "Lauren Tanner?"

She laughed, and from the corner of his eye he noticed several of the Chinese gymnasts looking their way in shock. Nobody laughed when they were about to perform at the Olympics.

There was an odd sense of lightness with his team today. They were in the finals of the biggest competition of their lives, and not a single one of them was nervous. It could be because of confidence, knowing that they were the best team in the world, but he didn't think that was the reason. He was pretty sure that Kelly was right. They didn't care about the medal.

They already had their perfect night as a team. Qualifying had been an amazing and emotional experience, and it was enough for them. Winning a medal would just be icing on the cake.

Payson's score came up and it was massive. A 16.65, even higher than Lauren's had been during qualifying. Of course, the difference was from difficulty value, not execution, because nobody executed like Lauren on beam.

"Way to kick ass, Keeler!"

He couldn't stop himself from laughing. Only Lauren Tanner would say something like that while she was staring down the beam at the Olympics.

It all seemed to go quickly after that. If anyone asked, he could tell them exact details about her routine, even down to her hand placements, but he couldn't tell them how he got off the podium. It felt like a single second had passed, but Lauren was coming down the stairs to meet him, so it had to have been ninety. It was surreal.

Lauren was smothered in hugs, and then the girls quickly moved to gather their things. Beam and floor were usually the last apparatuses to finish, so they would be heading to the next rotation with little delay. The girls were just shouldering their bags when the world turned surreal again.

The audience was booing. This was his third Olympics and he'd never experienced a booing crowd before.

Lauren's score had been posted. A 16.475, a fantastic score for any other gymnast, but it was a huge underscoring for Lauren. He kept track of every mistake she made, and she should have got a 16.6 _at least_. Enough people in the crowd understood the code of points to be booing the score, and the rest understood enough to join in. Payson scored a 16.65, and Lauren was better, so even the most inexperienced of spectators could figure out that something was wrong.

"Wow," Lauren said, "I'm… kind of honored."

He didn't even have to say anything; the confusion on his face was clear enough. She clarified. "Thousands of people are booing because they think I got underscored. It's flattering. I can't believe that this many people care about my score."

It was times like these that he wondered what happened to the angry little girl he met when he first came to the Rock. He didn't always notice it, because her flamboyant personality hadn't changed, but she'd grown up so much. He pulled her in for a hug and asked, "When the hell did you become an adult?"

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><p>AN: Where were the reviews last chapter? Did you all go on vacation :(

So, the real Olympic teams are Jonathan Horton, John Orozco, Danell Leyva, Sam Mikulak, and Jake Dalton for the men and Jordyn Wieber, Aly Raisman, Gabby Douglas, Kyla Ross, and McKayla Maroney for the women. I couldn't be happier with the men's team. They are going to be amazing! I _could_ be happier with the women's team; I think there was a bad decision in there. Anyway, what do ya'll think?

Let me know what you think about this chapter, too :)


	47. Chapter 47

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

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><p>The pride that Lauren heard in Sasha's voice was worth way more than a few measly tenths of a point. He called her an adult. She'd never been called that before.<p>

It was funny to think that she used to be jealous of Sasha's relationship with Payson. It was obvious now that he loved them all. Of course, he loved Payson _more_, but he couldn't help that. It wasn't his fault that they fit so well together.

She owed so much to both of them, because they made her change. It was ironic that she spent so many years trying to avoid the consequences of her actions, but when she finally had to face them it made her life better. She'd been so lonely back then. Now she had more love that she could ever have imagined possible.

She looked at the scoreboard again, searching for the team rankings. She knew they were in the lead, but she was wondering by how much. What she saw surprised her.

They were four points ahead… of _Russia_.

"Huh. How'd that happen?" She was thinking out loud, really. She knew that Sasha couldn't answer, not with the Chinese team so close by.

China was in third place, and Romania was just a few tenths of a point behind them. China had their two strongest events behind them, and vault was a huge weakness for them. Russia and Romania each had their strongest apparatus ahead. It was looking pretty likely that China would be off the podium by the end of the night. Which kind of sucked, because Lauren had put money on them for silver.

She put her warm ups back on before they moved to floor. She was done for the night, at least as far as she knew. And even if she wasn't, she wouldn't be letting the other teams know that. Payson intimidated the hell out of most gymnasts, but if they thought she was out they would go full throttle trying to make up lost ground.

Sasha was apparently thinking along the same lines, because he approached Payson as soon as they dropped their bags. He was right up behind her with his hands on her shoulders and his head bent down to whisper in her ear. Lauren didn't know who they thought they were fooling, other than themselves. If Payson wasn't already with Austin, everybody would think she was sleeping with Sasha. The way they touched each other, it was hotter than sex.

Sasha needed lessons in subtlety. He finished talking with Payson and then went to speak with Kaylie and Kelly in what was the most obvious cover up she'd ever seen. As if the whole world didn't know that they were talking about whether or not Payson was well enough to finish out. There was no point in trying to hide it. The thing that he needed to worry about hiding was if the answer was no.

At least he was smart enough not to come talk to her about it himself. Payson came instead, and she was a much better actor. She slipped her arm around Lauren's shoulders and asked, "Are you sure you're okay about that score? You deserved so much higher."

"I'm fine," Lauren answered, bumping her hip against Payson's. "I'm just a little bitter that you beat me. But don't worry, I'll take you in the finals."

"Bring it," Payson said.

She answered with a classic movie line. "Oh, it's already been broughten." They both laughed and Payson slung her arm around Lauren in a hug. It made a fantastic showing for all the people eavesdropping.

Of course, what they couldn't hear was Payson whispering in her ear, "Can you vault without a warm up?"

Out loud she said, "I can take you any day, any time, Keeler." Translation: Of course I can.

Payson pulled away from the hug. "Okay, I have to go get ready for floor. You just… keep on bringing it."

They shouldn't be this flippant at the finals of the Olympics. It defied all logic. This was the time when people started freaking out, like China was apparently doing. It made no sense for them to be joking around, but they were, and most of it wasn't even about the cover up. They were just having a lot of fun.

Emily came to stand beside her and nodded toward their parents sitting together in the stands. "So what do you think, are we going to end up stepsisters?"

A year ago she would have scratched Emily's eyes out for saying something like that, but now she just laughed. "I'm so not sharing a room with you, Kmetko."

"Okay, let's pretend that your house doesn't have like ten bedrooms. I'll be in LA and you'll be at Stanford, so when would we _ever_ have a chance to share a room?"

"Okay, fine," she admitted, "My joke didn't make sense. Don't rub it in. But yeah, as long as neither of them does something stupid to screw it up, I'd put money on a marriage. When did I become okay with that?"

Emily nudged their shoulders together. "Probably around the same time I did. Last time they were together I wanted to shoot my mom. Or your dad. Or you."

Lauren tried to act offended, but since she'd pretty much felt the same way back then, she couldn't pull it off. Instead she nodded to the floor, where Genghi Cho was finishing up for the Chinese. "What do you think, her or Kelly for the silver?" It went without saying that Payson would win the gold. Nobody else came close.

"I think Kelly," Emily said. "Floor is more dependent on artistry than any other event, and Kelly loves that routine so much. It shows."

She nodded. Emily was right; artistry was a way bigger deal on floor than it was on any other event, and Genghi was more about hard tricks and good execution than artistry. She couldn't draw the crowd in like Kelly could.

Kaylie had the same problem, Lauren thought as her friend took the floor. She had a beautiful routine and her execution was flawless, thanks to being Sasha's gymnast, but she wasn't telling a story. Her floor didn't _mean_ anything, and Kelly and Payson's routines did. Kelly was telling the world about one of her fondest memories, spending time with her grandmother in the Philippines, and Payson… well, Payson told a different story every time she performed. For a long time it had been about her feelings for Sasha. Then it was about her own journey, becoming an adult and learning to see the world around her. At Nationals it had been about the fear and pain of being back at the competition that she had nearly died for a year earlier. Payson thought she'd kept those feelings a secret from the rest of them, but she couldn't hide anything while she was on the floor. Those that didn't know her probably didn't catch it, but the Rock girls understood everything about each other.

Payson's performance at qualifying the other day had been devastating. It would haunt Lauren for the rest of her life. Of course, she didn't understand the full extent of it at the time, because she didn't know about the baby, but she understood enough. Payson had shown them a combination of terror and acceptance, and it was the acceptance that bothered Lauren so much. She wasn't ready to accept the possibility of Payson dying, and Payson shouldn't be either.

Lauren was in a sort of trance during the floor rotation. She saw Kaylie and Kelly's floor routines, noted how well they'd done and cheered them on, but it was all from a distance, like she wasn't really there. She, like the whole rest of the world, was waiting for Payson. It could be amazing or it could go terribly, terribly wrong.

When Payson took the floor, her four teammates stood together holding hands, watching with fear and expectation. The story she was telling was mesmerizing. It was one of hope, and it lifted the girls out of their worry, but it wasn't perfect. Not by a long shot. She was performing better than most of the field, but that was far below what she was capable of. It didn't matter how many mistakes she made, though, because she had the crowd enthralled.

They all breathed a sigh of relief when Payson floated down to her final pose. She wouldn't have done it if she wasn't sure that it was safe, but that didn't stop them from worrying about her, and knowing that she made it through unharmed was as good as winning gold.

She came off of the floor and straight into Sasha's arms, as expected. They all hugged their coach first, and he meant even more to Payson than he did to the rest of them. She came to them next, though, for a group hug. The five girls crowded together into the amount of space that two people would normally fill, giving literal meaning to their constant statement that they were a close team. Lauren would bet her life that a picture of this hug ended up on the front of the next issue of Sports Illustrated. SI covers during the Olympics were always pictures of iconic moments, and this was definitely iconic.

They didn't pull apart until Payson's scores were posted. A 15.9, low for her but still the highest of the night. Lauren searched for the team rankings next.

V UB BB FX Total Gap

1 United States 49.575 48.925 47.1 145.6 0.0

2 Russia 47.35 47.125 47.175 141.65 3.95

3 China 47.625 44.975 46.125 138.675 6.925

4 Romania 47.325 45.225 46.025 138.575 7.025

Russia was holding ground and had even gained a little bit, mostly because balance beam was their best event and uneven bars had been a relative weakness, but China was dropping rapidly. They were only a tenth ahead of Romania, and the last event of the night would be China's weakest and Romania's strongest. Unless there were any major falls, the podium would be the U.S., Russia, and Romania.

They shouldered their bags and moved to vault. Lauren still didn't know if she was competing or not. She expected more of the whispered conversations they been having, so she was surprised when Sasha turned to Payson and asked, "Final decision?"

Payson raised an eyebrow at his lack of discretion, but she answered anyway. "No. I think I could do it, but it's not worth the risk. There's too much of a chance that I'll fall."

"Okay. You're up," he said, clapping Lauren on the shoulder.

Curiosity got the better of her and she asked, "What happened to hiding this until the last minute? I thought we didn't want people to know that Payson was out."

He grinned. "There's no point now. They can't catch up."

She smiled back. That was pretty damn cool. Not many teams ever had the chance to say something like that. "So I guess I get to warm up after all, huh?"

"Yeah, and you better get going," he said, giving her a light hearted shove toward the run.

Time sped up. The Chinese put on a fantastic showing, all three of them getting the highest vault scores of their careers, but it was a futile effort. Romania was just too good on floor. The only way the Chinese would land on the podium was if Romania tanked.

It seemed like seconds had passed, though in reality it had been several minutes, and it was her turn to vault. Before she climbed the stairs she turned to Payson. There was something she needed to say, something she should have told Payson a long time ago.

"Thank you," she said, trying hard not to cry.

The look on Payson's face was quizzical. "For what?"

She couldn't hold the tears back anymore. They slipped from her eyes as she finally admitted something that she'd known for a year. "You saved me, Payson. You didn't have to forgive me back then. You could have just cut me off and stopped speaking to me, and nobody would have blamed you. You helped me and I didn't deserve it, but I swear I will _never_ do anything to make you regret that decision."

Payson was crying, too, and she took both of Lauren's hands in hers and said, "I didn't save you, Lauren. You saved yourself. You were so brave, working to change like you did, and I am so proud of you. I'll _always_ be proud of you."

Sasha laid his hand on her shoulder, reminding her that she needed to go, so she hugged Payson tight and then stepped away. Payson was a mess, with tears leaving streaks in her makeup, and Lauren was sure that she looked the same, but she didn't care. For once, something was more important than looking good on camera.

She checked her distance and steadied herself to vault, but then she heard Payson call her name. She glanced sideways at her teammate, who winked and said, "Go kick ass."

It was the same thing she'd said before Lauren's beam on Sunday, the beam that had won her a standing ovation, so she took it to be good luck. She was going to rock this vault.

She saluted with a huge smile on her face, which the judges would love, raised up on her toes, and pounded down the runway. She loved this vault. Handspring vaults were always more fun to her than Yurchenkos. They made her feel powerful, and Lauren's gymnastics was all about power. That's why she was so great on beam. She couldn't be graceful like Payson, but she could throw a standing full like nobody's business, and that move was all about strength.

It was one of the best vaults she'd ever done, a 15.1, and no matter what Payson said, Lauren knew the truth. She owed it all to Payson Keeler and Sasha Belov.

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><p>AN: Hmm… what's going to happen in the team rankings? Predictions?

Thanks so much to all of my awesome reviewers! To those of you who reviewed as guests, THANKS! Thanks to those of you who logged in to review, too :) I heart you all. Now go do it again! :D


	48. Chapter 48

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

A/N: Get your suspension of disbelief ready for this chapter. It's not as unrealistic as it might seem, though. The scores are almost exactly what happened at the World Championships last year.

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><p>His girls didn't pay attention to their competitors, which is the way he liked it, but they were missing out on some of the most shocking moments of Olympic history. They didn't notice when Zhou tanked on beam and Genghi and Jinnin choked, knocking the Chinese out of medal contention. That beam rotation would be replayed by sportscasters for years, the ultimate black mark on a nation's gymnastics team, but now they would have some notable company. Serafima Oborski of Russia just had the worst floor of her life, scoring an abysmal 12.975. Everything that could go wrong on floor did. Falls, stepping out of bounds, failure to end with the music. It was an unmitigated disaster.<p>

The team didn't notice the scores until long after Kaylie, the last American to compete, jumped off the podium and into his arms. They didn't need numbers to know they'd won. They hugged and screamed and cried, and more than a few emotional words were exchanged, until Kaylie finally looked for her score (a 15.95, .275 points higher than Kelly's vault) and froze in place.

"Oh my God," she said.

Kelly was less delicate. "What the hell happened?"

He tried not to smile. It was so unprofessional to smile while talking about another team's misfortune, but he couldn't shake the part of him that thought it was kind of funny. "The short version is that Zhou fell off the beam twice and Oborski had the worst floor of her life."

Payson's lips were moving as she did the math. "Romania has a shot at the silver. They need thirty one points to do it and they're capable. It would be by a hair and they'd have to be perfect, but they can do it."

"I know." He couldn't keep the smile off his face that time. He was born in Romania, and even though he chose to compete for England in Sydney, he couldn't completely shake his allegiance to his home country. He _really_ wanted them to beat Russia.

The girls exchanged looks and seemed to come to a decision as one, because they all took off at the same time and ran to lean against the middle of the vault run, where they would have the best view of the floor. Anca Kisslinger was just finishing up.

Now that the U.S. had secured gold, the whole arena was concentrating on the Romanians, rooting for the underdog to pull to the front. It would be a huge upset. Romania was a solid fourth place team, good but not good enough. Their shot at the podium relied heavily on one of the other teams making a mistake that would leave an opening, but nobody expected China _and_ Russia to screw up. Both teams had self-destructed, but there would be nothing empty about a victory for Romania now. If they managed to win the silver they would go down in history as the team that held together when everybody else was falling apart.

Kisslinger's scores posted: 15.4. The reaction of the crowd was mixed. Those who knew relatively little about gymnastics or who hadn't done the math were cheering for what was a very good score, almost to the level of the Americans. The experts were groaning, because they knew that Elisabeta Patrescu needed to score higher than a 15.6.

Lauren's shoulders slumped. "She can't do it. A 15.625, that's almost as high as Kelly. She just doesn't have the DOD for it."

"Don't count her out yet," he advised. "I bet she's got something up her sleeve. She'll go all or nothing." Sasha knew their coach, and he was a risk taker, much like Sasha himself. He would rather lose the bronze than say they hadn't even tried for silver.

He was right. Elisa piked her forward full, raising her connection bonus for the pass, and added a full twist to her double back. With two tenths of a point in upgrades, and good execution for it all, she had a real shot at pulling it off.

There was complete silence in the arena, or at least Sasha thought there was. It could be that he was blocking out all the sound, but he was pretty sure it was real. It was as if the whole world had stopped to wait for Elisa's scores.

There was a flash of numbers on the electronic score board, a few charged seconds as comprehension drew on the crowd, and then an explosion of sound. One side of the JumboTron showed a 15.625 for Elisabeta, the exact score she needed to pull her team out front, and the other side posted the final rankings for the team competition.

V UB BB FX Total Gap

1 United States 46.725 49.575 48.925 47.1 192.325 0.0

2 Romania 47.325 45.225 46.025 46.35 184.925 7.4

3 Russia 47.35 47.125 47.175 43.25 184.9 7.425

4 China 46.275 47.625 44.75 46.125 184.775 7.55

"Yes!" he yelled, pumping his fist in the air. The word was out of his mouth before he could stop to consider that he shouldn't be saying it, but he couldn't bring himself to care. His girls were taking home the gold with a record breaking lead, one that would probably never be equaled, and his homeland withstood enormous pressure to win the silver. He was too happy to worry about diplomacy.

o-O-o

Austin was worried and happy, and he was having a hard time deciding which emotion won out. The girls had just made history, and Payson had played a huge part in that, so he was happy, but she hadn't competed on vault and he didn't know why, so he was worried. Payson didn't seem to be really sick, though, and he was pretty good at telling by now, so he thought that she might be sitting out as a precaution. That put happy in the lead over worried.

The interval between Elisabeta Patrescu's game changing floor routine and the medal ceremony seemed endless. He wanted to see Payson and he couldn't do that until after the ceremony, so he wished they would hurry up already.

It was worth the wait, though, when he finally saw his friends on top of the podium with tears falling from their eyes and huge smiles on their faces. They knew that they would win—everybody knew they would win—but it was different actually experiencing it. He'd been on that podium several times now, and it never got less awesome, but the first time was special. Payson would be up there five more times before the Games were over, but for the rest of her life this would be the moment that stood out for her. It was fitting that her first Olympic Championship was with her friends. She'd been through hell and back with those girls, and they were a family in a way that no other team would ever understand.

When the ceremony was over and the team was gathered to take pictures, Payson broke away from the pack. He could see Marcus McGowan yelling at her to come back, but she ignored him and ran to where he was sitting in the stands. She was calling a name, but it wasn't his.

"Andy!" she said, climbing up and over the rails to stand in front of Andrea Conway. She took her gold medal off and placed it around Andy's neck instead. "This belongs to you. You're a part of this team, and so are you, Beth, and you deserve this medal just as much as we do. You gave up the chance of a lifetime for me, Andy, and I will never forget that."

Andrea seemed to be in shock, but she hugged Payson and said, "Thank you. Thank you so much, Payson. This means the world to me."

Pay broke away and came to him for a quick kiss. "I have to go back down," she said, "but I wanted you to know that I'm fine. I'm tired, but nothing worse."

"Thank God," he said, pressing another kiss to her lips. "Go. I'll find you as soon as they let us down there."

It was another interminable wait. He couldn't imagine how hard this had been for Payson the night before, waiting to come down to him while she was a mess of emotions. He felt guilty for having put her through that, and thankful that she'd prevented his own fears from going into overdrive by letting him know that she was okay. With this long to stew, he would have grown completely irrational and talked himself from confident in her wellbeing to certain that she was dying.

It was a relief when he could finally go down to her. It didn't take him long to find her in the crowd because he'd been keeping track of her the whole time. His eyes followed her every time she moved to speak with a different reporter, so he knew exactly where she was standing when the floor opened. It was just a matter of weaving his way through the crowds.

When he reached her, he picked her up and spun her around. "I am so proud of you," he said, ignoring the reporter she was speaking to. He thought it was someone from the BBC, but he wasn't sure.

She turned to excuse herself from the interview he had just interrupted, and then wrapped her arms around his neck and lifted on her toes to kiss him. She pulled away and grinned. "I'm an Olympic Champion now. I've joined the ranks of you, Sasha, and Marty."

"Please," he snorted, "You'll surpass us all by the end of competition."

She snuggled closer to him, heedless of the multiple photographers snapping pictures of them. "Sasha and Marty _maybe_, but I don't think I'm going to beat you. You're a three time gold medalist already, and likely to win several more. The most I might do is tie you."

She was right about the sheer number of medals, but she didn't comprehend, and never had, just how important she was to the sport. There had never been a gymnast like her, and likely never would be again, but she was humble enough to believe that she was just like every other athlete here, except that maybe she worked a little harder. "Okay," he teased, "We can't really compare us, because the men have more events, so let's talk about percentages. So far I'm three for nine, Marty was three for eight, and Sasha was four for eight. You're one for one. We'll keep a running tally."

She laughed and agreed, but he could tell that she didn't take him seriously. She would never be able to see just how amazing she was.

He wanted to go back to the Village with her so that they could spend as much time as possible together before curfew, but she crushed his hopes with just a few words. "The NGO promised NBC an exclusive interview with the whole team right after this, so I'm going to be stuck here for a while."

"Haven't you already done an interview with NBC? I thought they talked to you guys as a group right after the medal ceremony?" He was sure he'd seen the team talking to Andrea Joyce, and then again individually.

Payson grimaced. She hated doing interviews. "Yeah, we did, but this is supposed to be special. This is with Matt Lauer, something about talking to us as a family rather than a team."

He could tell that Payson didn't want to do it, but he couldn't help but think that the interview would be interesting. It was a side of the girls that the public never saw. People talked about how close the team was, but nobody outside of a very close knit group got to see the full extent of their relationship. Even the male gymnasts, most of who had known these girls for years, were flabbergasted by their interaction at lunch earlier that day.

"Can I come with you?" he asked.

She snorted. "Not unless you kill Marcus first, because he's never going to let it happen. I'll come see you when we're done, though."

As if he had been summoned, Marcus McGowan appeared by their side. He glared at Austin. "Payson," he said, "You have responsibilities to the press. There are reporters waiting to speak with you. You can talk to your boyfriend on your own time."

"Of course, Mr. McGowan," she said, with a big, fake smile on her face. Austin was surprised that Marcus didn't notice her insincerity. "Who would you like me to speak with now?"

Marcus took her elbow and started leading her away, but she reached back for Austin and took his hand, dragging him along with her. Beside her, the women's team coordinator was giving her instructions. "There is a reporter from CNN International that you need to talk to, and then Sky Sports wants an interview. After that you need to head out and get ready for the NBC interview. One of the other girls will fill you in on the details when you get to the locker room."

He left them with a young woman who looked rather like Payson. Her blonde hair was shorter and her eyes were blue instead of green, but they did look similar. She introduced herself as Amanda Davies from CNN International. She was less invasive than most reporters, but she did still ask some personal questions. It would almost be bad reporting at this point _not_ to ask Payson about her medical problems. Of course, she always fed them the exact same bull shit line, but they had to ask.

Austin stood by her side as she finished the two interviews, fielding a few questions himself with each newscaster, and then enlisted the help of Steven and Jake to get Payson to the locker room. They walked slightly to the front on either side of her, forming a barrier between her and the dozens of people trying to shove cameras and microphones in her face. He hoped that this would all calm down after the Olympics, or she would need to hire real bodyguards.

Payson was the last girl there, having had the most media attention, so he didn't get to go inside with her while she got ready. He had to say goodbye at the door. He pressed a sweet kiss to her lips, then considered the fact that he wouldn't have much time with her until the next evening, and pulled her in for a deep, passionate kiss. Her eyes were clouded with lust when they separated, but she knew her responsibilities. So, despite both their wishes, she stepped out of his arms and into the locker room.

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><p>AN: So, like I said, the scores for the team finals here are almost exactly like the scores for Worlds last year. There were these gigantic number gaps between the U.S., Russia, China, and Romania. If one of the Russia gymnasts had disaster routine like Anca did in this chapter, those would pretty much be the standings.

Where did all of my reviewers go to? Show me the love, people! If I get lots of reviews on this chapter the next one just might be huge ;)


	49. Chapter 49

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

A/N: Ya'll lived up to your end of the bargain, so now I'm living up to mine :D Here's that big chapter I promised you.

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><p>"Good evening everybody. I'm Matt Lauer coming to you from beautiful London, England, and I'm here with the five young women who have captivated America. I'm sure you were all watching this afternoon when gymnasts Payson Keeler, Kelly Parker, Kaylie Cruz, Lauren Tanner, and Emily Kmetko made history by winning the Team Gold in the Women's Gymnastics Final with a record-breaking seven point lead. I'm here with them now to discuss that win and to talk about the relationship that they share, which they say goes deeper than a team. Girls, congratulations and thank you for being here."<p>

They all murmured polite replies. They were grouped together in a backstage room at the North Greenwich Arena which had been decorated to look like they were in a house. There was a richly embroidered rug on the floor and drapes hung on the wall behind them to simulate windows, with furniture, plants, and soft lighting strewn about to make the space look lived in. In the center of the room there were a couch and loveseat angled together, with Kelly, Payson, and Kaylie on one and Emily and Lauren on the other. They were dressed casually, but with the ridiculous addition of their gold medals hanging around their necks. Matt Lauer was sitting in a wing backed chair across from them. There were several cameras set up to catch different angles of the girls and host, rendering the whole atmosphere awkward.

"Ladies," Matt said, "You are only the second U.S. Women's gymnastics team to win the team gold, the first being, of course, the Magnificent Seven in 1996. Many people are saying that you are the best gymnastics team ever assembled. To what do you owe your success?"

Emily answered. "Well, a lot of it we owe to our coaches, Sasha Belov for us and Marty Walsh for Kelly, who have really driven us to be our best, but I think the biggest reason we've been so successful as a team is because of the bond we share. We're not just teammates, we're not just friends. We are a family."

"We've seen some rather extraordinary examples of that bond over the past few days of competition, especially during day one. I've never seen anything like it—during that day you were competing against each other for a spot in the finals, but you all really seemed to be cheering for each of your teammates to beat you. Was that real?"

"Of course it was," Lauren said with a laugh. She was smiling, but if anyone looked closely enough, they might see that she was tad offended by the question. "Why wouldn't we want our best friends to succeed? A lot of people probably won't believe this, but for us competing isn't about winning medals, and it hasn't been for a long time. It's about doing our best and having fun, so if one of our friends winds up with the medal we don't resent that."

"Speaking of medals," Matt said, shifting his gaze, "Payson, you aren't wearing yours. We saw earlier that you gave it to Andrea Conway, one of the alternates for your team. Why?"

"Andrea and Beth are very much a part of our team, Matt, and they both deserve medals, but Andrea in particular I felt like deserved the one that I was given. That medal could have been hers but she gave it up so that I could compete. That kind of selflessness, that is worth more than a thousand gold medals. Andy is a truly exceptional person."

"So it is true that you were removed from the team but Andrea refused to compete in your place?" he asked.

She nodded her head once. "Yes, it is true. At the time my health was very uncertain and we weren't sure if I would be able to compete, so the decision was made to replace me rather than risk a problem if I had to pull out at the last minute. I understand the decision, but I am incredibly honored and grateful that Andy and Beth would fight for me like that."

"What can you tell us about the health problems you've been having? How are you doing now?" He kept the questions vague and polite. He'd been instructed not to pry into her medical issues.

She gave her standard press release answer. "I have a genetic blood disorder that requires me to get frequent transfusions, and the reason that I was taken to the hospital on Saturday was because I needed a transfusion earlier than expected. I've started a new treatment, though, and I am getting better."

"I'm very glad to hear that, and I think I can speak for all of America when I say that we are hoping for a quick recovery for you." He waited for her to thank him before he changed subjects. "Now Kelly, you're doing very well in competition so far, having qualified in second place for the All Around, floor, and vault finals, but you are the only girl on this team who is not coached by Sasha Belov at the Rocky Mountain Gymnastics Training Center. How do you fit into this family that you've all created?"

Kelly laughed and tossed her hair. She could charm the pants off of any and all reporters. "I'm the bratty stepsister."

"You can just call her Drizella," Lauren chimed in.

Kelly picked up a small pillow from the corner of the couch and chucked it at Lauren, who screeched and ducked. "I said bratty stepsister, Lo, not evil stepsister. Anyway, Matt," she turned to face the anchor as if she hadn't just engaged in a pillow fight with her friend. "We've gotten along as a team for quite a while now, but it wasn't until recently that I really got to know them and become close friends with them. Now I can't imagine my life without these girls."

By 'recently' she meant the past week, but they didn't need to get into that on TV.

"Kaylie, Kelly, did the way qualifications played out for the two of you affect your friendship at all? Kaylie, you were ranked third behind Payson and Kelly for the All Around and vault, and ranked fourth on floor exercise, but you can't compete in any of the three finals because of the two-per-team limit. That can't be easy to deal with."

"I won't lie and say that I wasn't disappointed," Kaylie said, although there was no disappointment in her tone or expression, "but Emily said something to me that put it all in perspective. She said that, for her, it was enough to know that she was one of the best All Arounders in the world without feeling the need to prove it. A spot in the finals or a medal, they're great, but what's really important is the pride that I feel in my accomplishments and the pride that I feel in my friends. Kelly was amazing on Sunday and she really deserves to go to the finals and take home some hardware."

"And Kelly, how do you feel about this? I'm sure you're happy to be going to the finals, but it must be hard knowing that you knocked one of your best friends out of the competition."

"Oh, geez," she said, tilting her head back and huffing out a breath. "You hit the nail on the head. I don't know what to feel. Obviously I'm excited to be competing, but I hate that I'm the reason that Kaylie _isn't_, especially since it was so close between us. I would feel so much better about it all if Kaylie would agree to take the spot in the vault finals, but she's being stubborn."

Matt was taken aback. "You want Kaylie to compete in the vault finals? Is that even possible?"

"It is," Kaylie verified, "Kelly came to me yesterday and said that she wanted to step down, and since I ranked third during qualifying, I would take her place in the lineup. I had to threaten to step down too before she would give up on the idea."

"I told them I would be more than happy to stand in for both of them," quipped Lauren, "but Kelly didn't like that idea. I guess she just likes Kaylie better."

They all laughed at Lauren's joke, and Kelly 'apologized' for hurting her feelings. The host brought them back around to the topic. "Kelly, that's a pretty generous offer. How did you come to that decision?"

"I don't know how generous it really is, Matt, because I only offered to get rid of my own guilt. I didn't even consider it at first, but then I couldn't sleep that night after qualifying because it kept running through my head that Kaylie is a better vaulter than me. It was haunting me. It still is, really."

"And Kaylie," he asked, turning to face her, "Why did you say no? Did you feel like Kelly was offering you charity?"

Kaylie laughed. "Oh no, I never thought about it that way and Kelly _definitely_ didn't mean it that way. She offered because she thought I deserved it more, and I said no because I think she deserves it more. We don't bother with false modesty on this team, so I know that I'm a better vaulter than Kelly is, but being a champion isn't about skill alone. It's about being able to go the extra mile during a clutch situation. You see it all the time at the Olympics, athletes who come out and really show what they're made of, like Austin did on the parallel bars last night and Elisabeta did on the floor tonight. Kelly had the vault of her life on Sunday and she deserves to be rewarded for that."

"Now, you mentioned Austin Tucker, Payson's boyfriend and your ex-boyfriend. That has to be uncomfortable for you, watching your best friend and your former love interest together."

Kaylie's laughter rang across the room. "If we got upset every time one of us started dating someone else's ex, none of us would be speaking. This isn't some kind of teen soap where everybody hooks up with everybody else, but we live in a very small social circle, so it's inevitable that sometimes we date the same guy."

"So this is not the first time something like this has happened?" Matt asked.

The girls all looked at each other and then, as one, burst out laughing. Emily was the first one to recover. "Okay," she said, "I think I should explain this—what would you call this, a love octagon?—because I'm the only one not involved."

She took a long pause as if to gather her thoughts. "I'll try to do this without names. First there was Boy 1, who dated Kaylie and then Lauren, and then he left and went to Denver Elite and dated Kelly."

Kelly interrupted. "You know, I didn't really date him. That was back when we were enemies, so I was just trying to mess with Kaylie and Lauren's heads, and he was trying to make Lauren jealous. Honestly, he was kind of a jerk."

"Yeah, I know that _now_," Lauren said.

"And _that_ would be why I'm not using names," Emily said. She continued her explanation. "Then there was Boy 2. He was involved with Payson first and then he and Kaylie liked each other—"

Kaylie interrupted. "Ahh, I forgot about him. He was sweet."

Emily ignored Kaylie's interjection and kept going. "But he still had feelings for Payson, and Kaylie and Payson neither one wanted to hurt the other by being with him, so he left. Then there was a period of everyone being single until Boy 3 showed up. He dated Lauren first and then Payson, and when she broke up with him a while later he left."

"Wow," Lauren said, with a thoughtful expression. "I've never thought about it before, but we've run off a lot of guys."

"And then there was Austin," Emily concluded. "He and Kaylie ended things amicably and he stayed a good friend to all of us, and then several months later he and Payson got together. That's it. That's our whole dating history."

"I know this is going to sound cheesy," Kaylie said, "but boys come and go, as Emily just proved, but us, our team, we're forever. No guy is ever going to change that."

"And Emily?" Matt asked. "You didn't mention yourself in that story. Are you dating anyone?"

Lauren answered. "Oh, you know, just a rock star. Total normal teenage girl stuff."

Emily blushed and smiled. It was the smile of a girl in love. "I've been with Damon Young for about a year now."

"So you all have your normal teenage girl stuff, as Lauren put it, but you certainly don't live normal lives. As elite athletes things have to be pretty intense for you. What is a typical training day like for you girls?"

"A typical training day for us," Kelly asked, with a laugh, "or for Payson?"

"I didn't realize there was a difference," he said. "Why don't you tell me about both?"

"Well, a normal day for us _sane_ people," Lauren said, with a significant glance at Payson, "goes from 8 to 5 on Monday through Saturday. We train skills in the morning, a full rotation and then whatever apparatus we need to concentrate on that day. In the afternoon we do two hours of strength and conditioning and another two hours of skill training, and once a week Sasha makes us come in at 6 a.m. to run up Golden Gate Canyon Road, which is a half marathon _all uphill_. Kelly is nuts, so she usually comes in at 7 and stays 'til 6. And then there is Payson…"

"And you, Payson? What is a training day like for you?"

"Not that different," she said modestly. "I come in a little earlier and stay a little later, but we all do the same training."

"What makes Payson so great," Kaylie said, "is that she actually believes that's true. She works twice as hard as any other gymnast in the world and honestly thinks it's nothing special. She comes in a 6 every morning and does an hour of conditioning, then works skills 'til we get there and she joins in with us. When we leave she stays and does another hour of skills and then an hour of ballet, and on Sundays she and Sasha run Golden Gate Canyon again. And because they're both _insane_, they run all the way up and then turn around and run back down. I get tired just talking about her schedule."

Payson was blushing. "It's really not a big deal. You're making me sound like Superwoman or something, and I'm not."

"Well, I think you all sound like Superwoman," Matt said, giving Payson an out from her embarrassment. "What you ladies do is amazing. I have a hard time just getting to the gym three times a week, and you do it for eight hours a day. What is it that motivates you to work so hard?"

"We do it because we love it," Kelly said, her tone conveying her bafflement. To her, the reason should have been obvious. "Gymnastics is a part of who I am. I can't _not_ do it. I'm happier in the gym than I am in any other place in the world."

"The gym must have been a very welcome sanctuary to you this past year, because you have certainly had some difficulties. You cut ties with your mother earlier this year and filed for legal emancipation. I'm sure this can't be easy for you to talk about, but can you tell us a little bit about what caused the split?"

Kelly faltered. It was a tough subject and nobody really knew the reason for it outside of her six teammates. "I… It was a difficult decision to make, but I think it was the right one. My mother was making some decisions for me that I didn't agree with and emancipation was the only way I could take control of my own life. It hasn't been easy, and you're right about the gym being my sanctuary. Gymnastics kept me going when I didn't think I could stand on my own anymore."

"Your floor routine in particular helped you, I understand?"

"It did," she said, a soft smile returning to her face. "It's a memory from my childhood, before my father's death, and it has given me so much strength. The time I spent in the Philippines when I was little was one of the happiest times of my life."

"It seems that this has been a tough year for this team, which makes your accomplishments even more extraordinary. Kaylie, you faced an eating disorder earlier this year. Talk to us about that."

"I wouldn't say that I _faced_ an eating disorder," Kaylie said, putting emphasis on the past tense verb. "I'd say that I'm facing it still, and will be for the rest of my life. Anorexia doesn't just go away. It's a battle that I will fight for the rest of my life, but I have a great support system to help me. My teammates and Sasha, they keep me grounded. They give me strength every single day to keep fighting."

"Gymnastics is a sport that puts enormous pressure on girls to be perfect. Do you think that the sport caused or contributed to your disorder?" Matt asked.

Kaylie shook her head. "No. That was something that took me a long time to figure out, but gymnastics did not cause me to become anorexic. I used it as an excuse, but I was in a place that I would have found any excuse to justify my actions. The body image issues and the need for control, that existed outside of gymnastics. If anything I think the sport helped me. It gave me a reason to get better."

"So gymnastics helped you to recover from your eating disorder and it helped Kelly to get through a rough time with her family," he listed. "Did it do the same thing for you, Payson? Did the love you feel for the sport help you when you broke your back? You nearly died; it must have been difficult for you to risk your life with a comeback."

"My love for the sport certainly gave me the desire to comeback," she answered, "but it was my parents and Sasha who gave me the strength to do it. I _wanted_ to have the surgery to fix my back, but I was so scared that I almost didn't go through with it. If my parents hadn't supported me, I never would have been able to do it. And then when I actually got in the gym… God, I don't know what I would have done without Sasha. I wanted to give up so many times and he kept me going. He held onto my dream when I couldn't."

"You two are certainly very close," Matt said, leading into the inevitable question. "So close, in fact, that there was once an investigation into whether or not your relationship was inappropriate. What can you tell us about that infamous kiss video?"

Payson huffed out an exasperated groan. "Ugh, I'm never going to live that down." She paused to gather her thoughts. "What you have to understand is that what I do on floor, it's very emotional. Sometime I'll finish my routine and be completely elated, and sometimes I'll sit on the floor and cry uncontrollably. So when I kissed Sasha, that was the very definition of being caught up in the moment. It took me all of two seconds to realize what I was doing and freak out. Thankfully Sasha understood and didn't hold it against me."

"And what about the person who leaked the video? Do you know who it was?"

"I do."

There was an awkward pause as the host realized that Payson was not going to elaborate. He recovered and went in a new direction. "And now? You kiss your coach every time you come off the podium. Can you explain that to us?"

"Oh, God, how do I explain that?" she asked with a chuckle, looking at her friends. "It's so normal that I don't think about _why_."

"I think I can explain it," Emily offered, taking the pressure off her friend. "We're all best friends, but we are very different people. We all express ourselves differently. Like Kelly, she's really shy—don't kill me for telling people that, KP—and she doesn't talk about her feelings much, so when she changes the subject or makes a joke during a serious conversation, we know it's because she's uncomfortable and we roll with it. To people outside our group that might seem strange, but it's normal to us. And Lauren, she says _everything_ she's feeling. She's our emotional barometer. You can always look to her to figure out what's going on in our group. So just like we know those things about Lauren and Kelly, it's an accepted fact to us that Payson is a very physical person. All the hugging we do, that's a direct result of Payson. She made that the norm for us. Sasha has always kissed her on the top of the head, just like he always spins me around, and since we know Payson so well, it seems completely normal to us that she would kiss him back. It's just part of who she is."

"That's very interesting," Matt said, flying off the cuff because he didn't know where to take the conversation from there. Smooth transitions were escaping him. "I think that's a side of you that the public doesn't often see."

Kelly snorted. "I would think it would be pretty obvious considering the way she and Austin maul each other all the time."

"Kelly! We do not _maul_ each other."

"You kind of do," Kaylie added with a grin. "I mean, you did make out in front of hundreds of people yesterday."

"I think that went beyond making out. Seriously, the way you were going at it, I didn't even think you would make it back to the bedroom."

Payson blushed scarlet and covered her face. "Oh my God, Kelly! You can't say things like that on television." She looked up at Matt. "Can we edit that out?"

He didn't answer, which meant that no, they would not edit it out. Instead he said, "You all seem to be very comfortable joking with each other. In fact, there are some jokes that you have the whole world wondering about. Will you explain some of those?"

"Well, that depends on the joke," Emily teased.

"Okay, well we'll start with one that I've always been curious about. Why do the four of you—" he gestured toward the Rock girls— "call Kelly Satan? That sounds like an insult to me, but Kelly doesn't seem to mind."

Kelly answered. "Wow, you're the first person to ever ask that. I didn't even realize anyone knew about that nickname. It's because of my hair, obviously. Lauren pointed out a long time ago that my braids looked like horns, and it sort of evolved into the nickname Satan. I think at first it really was an insult, because we didn't always get along, but then it was just a joke."

"Plus," Emily added, "She's kind of the devil on our shoulders. She goads us on."

"Well, if Kelly is the devil on your shoulder, who is the angel on the other one?" Matt asked.

Emily said "Payson" at the same time that her friends all said "Emily."

Their host chucked. "So, I think the general consensus is that it's Emily, but Emily, you said Payson. Why?"

"Well I guess maybe she's just the angel on _my_ shoulder. She's always the one who keeps me grounded when I get distracted by life."

"Or by Damon," Kaylie teased.

"Well, Emily, my next question revolves around you. My fellow host Elfie Schlegel has been curious about this one for a long time, and she specifically wanted me to ask you about it. Just what is so funny about a two and a half punch front?"

All five girls laughed. "Should I tell him?" Emily asked her friends.

"Go ahead," Lauren said. "Let's put Elfie out of her misery."

"Well, when I first came to the Rock, the very first thing anybody said to me was 'Nice two and a half punch front.' Then we all proceeded to not speak to each other for two days straight."

"Why?" asked Matt.

"Because we were sixteen and didn't handle change very well," Lauren answered. Then she paused and admitted, "And I was jealous of the tumbling pass."

Payson moved them past the awkward moment, saving Lauren from any embarrassment. "Okay, what's next? What else are you dying to know about us?"

She said it with such casual teasing that it didn't seem like she was forcing a subject change. Matt collected his thoughts and asked, "This is another one from Elfie. Did Coach Belov actually make you do four hundred and forty three cartwheels in one day, or did you make up that number?"

"Oh, no," Payson said with a hearty laugh. "That is the absolute truth. I kept track. I _hated_ him that day. Looking back, I'm surprised I even did it. That's usually the kind of thing that leads to us having a knock down, drag out fight in the middle of the gym."

"You fight with your coach?" Matt asked, flabbergasted.

"Payson and I fight with him," Emily said, "and Payson more so than me. Kaylie tends to go more for passive-aggressive disrespect—" Kaylie snorted "—and Lauren… actually, have you ever gotten into an argument with Sasha?"

"No, I haven't," she answered, her tone indicating that this was a revelation for her. "I guess we're sort of on the same wavelength. I'm a pretty simple gymnast, compared to you three who are pretty complex, so there is less to argue about. I'm about power and hard work and that's it."

Kelly nodded her agreement. "Yeah, it's the same way for me. I don't have to argue with Marty about which move fits my style better because there is really only one option. It either works or it doesn't. There isn't any grey area."

Matt moved on. Their time was running short. "Let's talk about the team finals. You won with a record breaking lead, nearly seven and a half points. You seemed very relaxed during the competition. Was it because you knew that you were so much better than your opponents?"

"No," Payson said. Her tone left no room for argument. "Winning was never a sure thing. We are a very strong team, but so are China, Russia, and Romania. China and Russia had falls, but that could have just as easily been us. In a sport like gymnastics where every tenth counts, you can't take anything for granted."

"I think what really made the difference for us," Kaylie said, "is that we weren't competing to win. We were just there to have fun, which left us a lot more relaxed than the other teams and, as a result, let us perform at our best level."

"You weren't competing to win?"

Emily smiled and answered, "We wanted to win of course, but that wasn't the most import thing to us. A medal is just a thing. What really matters is our team, and we'd already had our perfect moment together. As awesome as it was to stand on that podium tonight, it doesn't hold a candle to what we experienced after Lauren's beam during qualifying. _That_ is the memory that we're all going to walk away from here with."

"That was a very special moment," he admitted. "Lauren, you received a standing ovation after that routine. I don't think I've ever seen a single event get a standing ovation during a team competition before. What did that feel like?"

"It was… God, it was too awesome to even explain. I was so honored. I just wanted to make Payson proud; it never even occurred to me that I would get that kind of reaction. It was… it was one of the best experiences of my life."

"You wanted to make Payson proud," he repeated, leading into this next question. "The two of you seem to have a very special connection, even outside of the relationship you all share as a team. What is it that makes the two of you so close?"

Both girls hesitated. Their history was very private, and neither wanted to make the details known. Lauren finally answered. "Payson was there for me when I was going through a very difficult time. I was hurting and lashing out because of it, but Payson just refused to let me push her away. She loved me when I was making myself very hard to love, and I'm never going to forget that."

Lauren was getting emotional, and through unspoken agreement Payson and Emily stood up and switched seats. Payson pulled her into a tight embrace.

"Can you tell us what happened before the vault rotation?" Matt asked, his voice low and quiet. He was reluctant to interrupt the touching moment, but he had an interview to finish. "The two of you spoke before Lauren vaulted and you were both crying. A lot of people are speculating that the conversation was about the reason that Lauren took your place in the rotation, Payson. Is that true?"

The two girls were holding hands as they sat on the love seat together. Payson smiled at Lauren before she answered. "No, it had nothing to do with why I didn't vault. There was nothing special in that decision. I was tired and didn't know if I could vault without falling, so Lauren stepped up. What we were talking about was more of a best friend thing."

He, unlike most reporters, accepted the answer at face value and respected their privacy. "Well, ladies, thank you for sitting down with me tonight. You have done amazing things here this week and I'm sure you will all continue to accomplish great things. I just have one more question. For each of you, what is the greatest thing you've learned from your journey to the Olympics?"

"Strength," Kelly said. "Strength to do the things that I thought were impossible." She wasn't talking about gymnastics tricks and they all knew it. Gymnastics had given her the strength to stand up to her mother and reclaim her life.

Emily took Kelly's hand in her own and answered, "Trust. Trust in my teammates, my coach, my family, and myself."

"Confidence," Kaylie said, joining the chain by twining her fingers with Emily's. "I've learned to believe in myself no matter the circumstances." The five girls were all thinking about the same things. Kaylie's fear at the China meet, her eating disorder, her recent loss to Kelly during qualifying. But mostly they were thinking about the way she overcame them all and came out stronger for it.

Lauren bridged the gap between the couches to hold Kaylie's other hand, completing the link between the five girls. She looked to all of her friends before she said, "Love. I've learned how to love, but more importantly I've learned how to accept it from others."

Payson glanced to each of the other girls. "Everything they just said," she answered. "Strength, trust, confidence, love. _Life_. I've—we've _all_—learned how to live a life worth living."

Her smile turned mischievous. "That, and a few Romanian swear words from listening to Sasha all this time."

There was a pause before Kelly giggled and slapped her free hand over her mouth. One by one her teammates followed suit until they were all laughing, clinging together as they tried to rein in their mirth, and leaving Matt Lauer sitting across from them looking baffled.

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><p>AN: Posting tonight is a testament to how much I love all you guys, because I'm so tired that I can barely pick up my computer. But I promised so I'm forcing myself awake to do this :)

For those of you wondering about Mother Knows Best, it is temporarily on hiatus until I finish this one. As some of you might have noticed, I got in a little over my head ;) I have too many stories going at once and then craziness in real life, too, so I had to slow it down a little. I'm going to finish Amor Fati (which is getting a lot closer to happening now), then finish Mother Knows Best, then this other story that I'm working on, and then we'll see what happens from there :)

Give me reviews to help me make the push to finish this! REVIEWS=INSPIRATION.


	50. Chapter 50

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

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><p>The Austin Tucker from the Beijing Olympics would laugh at the Austin Tucker from the London Olympics. Beijing had been two straight weeks of hard partying for the entire men's gymnastics team. They'd been in London for an entire week and, with the exception of Max, the only party any of the men's team had been to was the Opening Ceremonies.<p>

Max was out getting trashed every night, which played a large part into why he barely qualified for the pommel final in 8th place. Otherwise, though, the guys were mainly hanging out in their apartment in the evenings. Nicky wasn't the kind to party, so nobody was surprised that he was staying in every night, and Austin just wasn't in the mood. Getting drunk had stopped being fun to him a long time ago, and why would he want to hook up with a bunch of random girls when he could be with Payson instead? Jake and Steven, faced with the choice between watching Max drink himself into a coma or playing Call of Duty with Austin and Nicky, made the smart decision to stay in.

Austin paused their game when he heard a knock on the door. As soon as he stood up, his friends un-paused the game and let Austin lose while they continued to play.

He didn't expect to see Payson on the other side of the door. He figured that after the NBC interview she would either want to go to sleep or hang out with her teammates to celebrate their win. But here she was, standing in front of him with her hand on her hip and a small smile on her face. "Hi."

"Hi," he said, pulling her in for a kiss. "I didn't think I'd be seeing you again tonight."

She wound her fingers into his hair and returned his kiss with far more vigor than he had intended. Behind them Steven wolf-whistled. She pulled back and smiled against his lips, saying, "I just wanted to say good luck in case I don't get to see you before you compete tomorrow."

"I don't need luck. I have you." It was as cheesy as you could get, but he meant it.

Payson hesitated before she spoke again. "Austin… please don't do that parallel bars routine tomorrow."

"I can stick the routine, Payson. I promise."

"Don't do it," she pleaded. "I know that you _can_, but that doesn't me you should. You have responsibilities now, Austin. You can't take the same kind of risks."

She lowered her voice and whispered, "With everything that's going on already, do you really want to take a chance like that? Do you want to leave our child an orphan?"

"Payson… It won't happen." He leaned down and pressed his forehead against hers. "You're going to be fine. We're going to raise our son together. But if you're really that worried I won't do the routine."

"Thank you," she said, and then rose up to kiss him. It was too melancholy. She deserved a lighthearted celebration after her win, so to lighten the mood, he nudged his tongue against her lips and slid his hands down to squeeze her ass. She recognized his motives and responded fully.

The kiss soon turned from a distraction to real desire. Forgetting that his teammates were in the room with him, he allowed himself to get caught up in the passion and press her body against the door. His hands were getting re-acquainted with her curves while one of hers fisted into the cotton of his t-shirt and the other slid under it to ghost over his abs. Things were getting hot when suddenly the TV remote smashed into the wall beside their heads. The three other men were watching the game intently and trying to look innocent.

Not long ago Payson would have been embarrassed by the situation and tried to escape as soon as possible. Actually, back then she would never have been in the situation to start with. Now she just laughed. "I think we're bothering your friends," she said. Only Austin could see the twinkle in her eyes. "Maybe I should go."

He ducked down to kiss her neck and mumbled against her skin, "Or maybe we should just take this to another room. If we're not going to see each other all day tomorrow don't you think we should make some memories to get us through the day?"

She laughed again, which quickly turned to a moan when his lips found the perfect spot on her neck. "I don't think they'd appreciate that, either. I suck at being quiet."

She really did. They'd discovered a few days previous that she had a hard time keeping the volume down during sex. They'd had to get creative to stop her moans from carrying out to where her roommates and coach were in the living room.

"We can find ways to fix that," he said, and then proceeded to whisper all kinds of suggestions in her ear, which grew progressively dirtier until she finally stopped him.

"Austin!" She pressed her hands against his chest and pushed him a few inches away. She was smiling, though, so he knew that she wasn't angry with him. "We are not doing _any_ of that, because I have to get back to my team. We just won Olympic Gold, remember?"

"I could come back with you. You can celebrate with them and then we can celebrate together." He was teasing, but he did want to spend the night with her.

He slipped his fingers beneath the hem of her shirt and her eyes fluttered shut. "I _really_ want to say yes, but you know what Kevin said. You can't lose that much sleep the night before you compete."

"Fine," he grumbled. He pulled her in for one more kiss and almost thought she'd changed her mind, but she left anyway, albeit a little unsteady on her feet.

He moved to rejoin the game and Jake, with a fake air of indifference, said, "So… you lose a lot of sleep when you're with her, huh?"

Austin slapped him upside the back of his head. "The reason Payson can't sleep alone right now is because someone has to check on her every hour to make sure that she hasn't had a stroke. You still think that joke is funny?"

And awkward silence settled over the group and Nicky, in a rare act of social appropriateness, called their attention back to the game and broke the tension in the room.

Much later, after Nicky had retired to the room he shared with Austin and Max had stumbled back into the apartment with some random guy he picked up at a party, the remaining three members of the team sat around the living room shooting the breeze and trying to ignore the sounds coming from Max's bedroom. When his cell phone rang, Austin escaped to the balcony to answer it. He didn't recognize the number, but when he picked up he recognized the voice immediately.

"Hey Austin," his sister said. "Guess where I am?"

o-O-o

Sasha was surprised by how quickly his girls were able to fill their coffee table with junk food. Lauren and Kaylie ran down to the store connected to the Olympic Village and loaded their arms while Andy and Beth brought in several bags full of candy, chips, and cookies from their room. The two alternates had a similar party the day of qualifying, but it was more of a wake for their Olympic dreams than a celebration. They hadn't been around for the past few days while they mourned their dreams, but they loved their teammates too much for them to stay away for long.

He should stop the junk food binge, but he didn't have the heart. Kaylie, Beth, and Andrea were done, so they could eat whatever they wanted, and Lauren and Emily had a little wiggle room because they wouldn't be competing again for a full week. Payson and Kelly, on the other hand, had the All Around in two days and couldn't afford to pig out, but a small indulgence wouldn't hurt them.

"Oh, that's just cruel," came a voice from over his shoulder. Payson was back from Austin's and looking at the snack-laden table like it was a poisonous snake about to bite her.

He threw a bag of M&M's her way. "As your coach I am giving you permission to eat some of this. It won't kill you, and you deserve to celebrate. Just don't go crazy." Like she ever would.

"I can't believe you're telling me to eat candy while I'm at the Olympics." She moved to sit beside him on the floor and settled against his chest. The other girls sent them curious looks, and Sasha was confused until he realized that they weren't used to seeing Payson act like this with him. It was one thing to know it was happening, but another thing altogether to see it. Andy and Beth didn't know about Payson's private life, so they were especially confused, but they didn't question her behavior.

It was a fun evening. The girls were in high spirits, bordering on euphoria, laughing and telling stories from their many years of training. They coaxed some stories out of him, too, and his recounting of the time the British gymnasts covered every surface of the French team's rooms with gay porn had Lauren laughing so hard that she hyperventilated. It wasn't the most appropriate story to tell them, but hell, that was a really funny prank.

They stayed up much later than he should have let them. Around midnight Payson nodded off in his arms, so he carried her to bed while the others continued their celebration. As he walked away he heard Emily explaining the situation to Beth and Andy.

He let her sleep while he changed clothes. He knew without being told that things had to change between him and Payson now that she was in a real relationship with Austin. Even though they didn't act on their attraction, it wasn't fair to Austin to continue as things had been lately. He couldn't sleep in his boxers anymore and she had to dress more conservatively as well.

After he donned his pajamas, he woke her. Her eyes fluttered open and he said, "You need to change, love. I know how much you hate sleeping in your clothes."

She reached out and tangled her fingers in the hem of his t-shirt. "You read my mind, didn't you?" she asked.

He chuckled under his breath. "I did. We have to be more careful now that you're with Austin."

"I told him everything, you know. He was surprisingly okay with it. He didn't resent anything. He was even fine with us still sleeping together, as long as we stopped… everything else. Whatever it is that we've been doing."

He didn't know how to define it either, but he knew that it had to end, at least for now. "Get changed, then," he said, and then teased, "And I promise that I won't watch you this time."

When she climbed into bed with him she rested her head above his heart and said, "I've missed you. We haven't had more than a few hours alone together these past couple of days."

He'd missed her too. He didn't resent the time she'd spent with Austin, but that didn't stop him from tossing in his bed the night before and reaching out for her in his sleep. He was far too used to sleeping with Payson for his own good.

Her eyes were glittering at him in the darkness. "I can't believe we really did it, Sasha. We're Olympic Champions."

"I never doubted that you would. I knew long before I came to the Rock that you would be up there on that podium. You're the reason I came, you know. I recognized your potential and wanted to be a part of it. And I've never regretted that decision, even when I was back in Romania. I was angry with myself for hurting you, but I was always glad to have had the opportunity to work with you. You—and Lauren and Emily and Kaylie—made me a better person."

"You did the same for us," she said. "You made us so much more than what we were before you came."

They lapsed into a comfortable silence. She was nearly asleep when he said, "You're doing better."

"I know. I'm not healthy, not by a long shot, but I am doing better. And I'm so, so thankful."

"Me too, Payson. Me too."

* * *

><p>AN: I've jinxed myself. Just when I mentioned that I could see the light at the end of the tunnel for this story, I got so busy that I haven't been able to write for days. Lol. I will soldier on, though!

Let me know what you think! There are four very important words in this chapter, and the character who they came from doesn't even know how important they are ;) Can you guess what it is? Gold stars to everyone who gets it right :)


	51. Chapter 51

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

A/N: Sorry for the disappearing act! Real life temporarily put my imaginary life on hold. Don't worry, I'm fine, but I got so busy for a while there that I've barely been on the internet in weeks, and even then it was on my phone. But I'm back now with a nice long chapter for you all :)

* * *

><p>Austin arranged for his family to come to London. He bought plane tickets, made hotel reservations, arranged seats for them at the O2 arena during the competition. He knew they wouldn't come, just like they didn't come to Beijing, but he did it anyway.<p>

Ava would have gone to the '08 Olympics if she could have, but she was fifteen years old at the time and couldn't go without her parents, who flatly refused to come. Now she was nineteen, but being around gymnastics was still difficult for her. She hadn't watched him compete in nearly three years, so as much as he wanted her to be there for him in London, he didn't expect it. Which is why he was so surprised when Ava called him last night from her room in the Four Seasons at Canary Wharf.

Kevin arranged for him to see her before he competed, and his excitement about seeing Ava far outweighed any nervousness he might feel for the All Around that afternoon. They hadn't seen each other in person in over a year, since before he moved to Boulder. He couldn't wait to see her, to hear all about her life, even though he'd heard it all over the phone before, and to tell her all about his.

He had a lot of explaining to do. She scolded him for not telling her about Payson before and asked how long they'd been together, and he didn't have the heart to tell her the truth over the phone. It was too complicated. Had they been together for two and a half weeks, one week, or two days?

And then he had to tell her about the baby. He was waiting to tell her in person, which he assumed would be after the Olympics, but suddenly she was here and he had to tell her now. How do you tell your baby sister that you had a one night stand with the woman you love, got her pregnant, and didn't remember any of it? As awkward as that conversation would be, though, he wanted her to know. He'd always shared everything with his sister, and he was so happy about the baby. He wanted to share that with her. He was excited to tell her about the baby's name, too. Ava would be honored that Payson wanted to name their child after her.

He was already excited about Ava, and his good day was made even better when Payson walked into the gym shortly after lunch. She wasn't expected to leave the hospital in time for any practice, so the whole gym stopped dead when she came thought the doors. Her teammates rushed toward her for a group hug and hundreds of questions, while he and Sasha stood by waiting for a chance to see her. Eventually the girls realized that there were other people who wanted to speak with her and started training again. Sasha indicated for Austin to go to her. He had one of those mystifying one-look conversations with Payson and then went back to work with the other girls, giving Austin some privacy with her.

He put his arms around her and lifted her up so that their lips were at the same level. Payson took advantage of the position and kissed him. She had a huge grin on her face.

"I thought you weren't going to be here today," he said.

"I thought so too. But it turns out that I didn't need as much blood today as I have the last couple of times, so it didn't take as long."

"That's fantastic, Pay. It's slowing down, isn't it?" Outside of that first day at qualifying, Payson hadn't been nearly as tired as she was the past few weeks.

Her smile was brilliant. "It is. My blood levels are still dropping, but not at the same rate as before. Baby steps, right?"

He couldn't help but laugh at her word choice. She kissed him again, her own thoughts turned in the same direction of his. Austin was conjuring up images of a little boy with his dark hair and Payson's green eyes wobbling across the floor to where Payson was sitting with her arms held open for him.

"What's going on with you?" she asked. "You look like you're about to burst with excitement."

He was impressed that she could tell. They hadn't been together for long, but already they were learning how to read each other. "Ava called me last night. She's here."

"Really?" she squealed, excitement clear in her voice. "I'm going to get to meet her?"

She sobered and pulled away from him. "Wait, does she know about… everything?"

He was busted. "No, not yet. I'm going to tell her this afternoon before I introduce her to you. She'll love you, though, don't worry."

"Are you sure? I mean, that's a pretty big bomb to drop on her when you haven't seen her for a whole year. And I don't come off so great in this story. She might hate me."

He furrowed his eyebrows. "What do you mean, about you not coming off so great?"

"I was a complete bitch to you," she said, rolling her eyes like he was missing something obvious. "And I manipulated you to get what I wanted. That's not going to endear me to Ava."

"That's not true, Pay." Sure, she'd made some mistakes, but so had he. "You were scared and angry. You didn't do or say anything that I didn't deserve."

They both dropped the subject. It was best not to dwell on the beginnings of their relationship. Their future was what mattered.

"It'll be fine. I promise." The words 'It'll be fine' were being thrown around a lot lately, but this was a time when he could mean it. Ava would love Payson. "But I think we should both go train before Kevin comes to drag me away."

He didn't have much longer to train before he peaced out to go see his sister. Kevin was the most understanding coach in the world, unrivaled by anyone except maybe Sasha. He made huge concessions when it came to Austin spending time with Payson, and he was even letting him leave practice a half hour early to see Ava before they all had to go to the arena. Kevin understood that there was so much more to being a champion than just skill, and seeing his little sis before the competition would put Austin at the top of his game.

He didn't even see her when he walked into the lobby of her hotel. He just walked in, glanced around, and then all of a sudden felt a small torpedo slam into him.

If it weren't for the familiar freckles covering her face and the electric blue eyes that she shared with him, he wouldn't have believed that the young woman staring up at him was the same tomboy kid he'd left in Texas just a year ago. She was beautiful. And grown up.

He gave her a bear hug with an accompanying growling roar. "It's so good to see you." The sentence carried a deeper meaning that they both felt. It's so good to see you _looking healthy_.

For years the anorexia hung around her like a shroud. Her weight came back slowly, her skin was pasty, her hair was dull. Worst of all, there was a haunted look in her eyes, like she was broken. The look was still there, but there was happiness mixed in with it, and her body looked like _her_ body again.

"It's good to see you, too," she said. A familiar grin covered her face, one that Austin hadn't seen in years, since before the eating disorder took over her life. "Come on, I want to hear about Payson and I know you won't talk about it out here. We're going to my room." She grabbed his hand and dragged him toward the elevators.

As soon as the door was closed behind them she turned to him and demanded that he spill. She'd never been one for small talk.

He decided to drop the biggest bomb first. "So… you're going to be an aunt."

"What!" she screeched, then punched him on the shoulder. "You got her pregnant?"

"I think I should be insulted that you don't sound more surprised by this." She was frustrated, sure, but not surprised.

"Are you kidding, I've been waiting for something like this to happen ever since Beijing. I just thought you'd be a little more careful with someone you cared so much about." She ran her hand through her hair and sighed. The gesture reminded him of Payson. "I don't get what's going on here. You've haven't shut up about her in months but you never bothered to mention that you were dating her, and now you're telling me that she's pregnant? So no more secrets. Tell me everything."

He did. As uncomfortable as the conversation was, he told her everything, starting with falling in love with Payson and his jealousy over Sasha, the night in St. Louis that he didn't remember, finding out that she was pregnant, the fight and their complicated relationship, Payson's illness, all leading up to the agreement he and Payson finally came to on Monday night. He finished by telling her about the baby's name, knowing that it would soften the blow for her.

"Payson's convinced that it's going to be a boy, but if it's a girl she wants to name her Alexandra Ava Tucker, if you're okay with that."

"Of course I'm okay with that," she said. It was the first time she spoke since he started his explanation. "Austin, I… I don't know what to say here. You're acting like you're fine with all this, but it can't be that easy. You're having a _baby_. She's sick. You love her and she doesn't love you. Nothing about this is fine."

"It is, A. It wasn't easy to get here, but we're in a good place now. And we're both really excited about the baby. Payson is going to be an amazing mom. And you'll be an amazing aunt."

"What about her?" she asked. "She's still sick, right? With that and the baby, should she even be competing? Isn't that irresponsible?"

He'd never thought about it, but he could see how it might seem that way. That was probably why MJ wanted them to pretend like Payson didn't find out she was pregnant until after the Games. "I see where you're coming from, A, but Payson has been under doctor supervision the whole time. If they told her it wasn't safe to compete she wouldn't, and she knows when to sit out. She's being safe about this."

Ava gave him a penetrating look. She knew him better than anybody, and she could read him like a book. "You're really happy?" she asked.

"I am," he assured her. "Happier than I've been in forever."

"And you really love her?"

"I do."

She nodded her head like she'd made a decision. "Okay then. Take me to meet her."

As was always the case with them, he heard what she wasn't saying. She accepted it all. She was happy for them. She was ready to make Payson part of their family. Like every other situation in her life, Ava would go into this with her whole heart.

"Okay," he agreed, "But we're hanging out later and it's your turn to talk. I want to hear everything I've missed since I moved to Boulder."

She reached out and shook his hand. "Deal."

o-O-o

Kaylie was uncomfortable.

Ava Tucker was sitting with the women's team in the stands while Austin competed below, and Kaylie didn't know where she fit in the situation. Ava, Payson, and Emily were telling funny stories about Austin, with occasional help from Lauren, but Kaylie stayed clammed up. All her stories about Austin were from when they were dating, or leading up to them dating, and that was a little too awkward for her tastes.

For some reason she always assumed that Ava would be like her, maybe because they were both dealing with eating disorders, but the girl that Austin brought to meet them in the tunnels of the North Greenwich Arena was a lot more like Payson. She hugged a lot. She was outspoken. She was beautiful without trying. Kaylie had a hunch that Ava Tucker wouldn't be caught dead in pink.

When Austin introduced them to his sister, she hugged them all, but there was something special in the way she hugged Payson and the loaded way she said "Congratulations" so that they all knew she was talking about more than just their Olympic medal. Kaylie used to think she'd be the one that got the special hug when they met. She wasn't regretting the way things turned out, but it still stung a bit.

Ava made Kaylie feel young, kind of like Payson did. Both of them were very much adults despite their age, but Kaylie and the other members of the team were teenagers in every definition of the word. It was easy to ignore when it was just Payson, but when the two of them were together it felt like a line had been drawn. Adults on one side, children on the other. Or maybe it was all in Kaylie's head.

"So he gets down on the floor," Payson was saying, "And starts meowing and making these scratching motions—" she demonstrated for them "—because I need to _find my inner cat_."

Ava was laughing almost too hard to talk. "What in God's name made you think that Austin was the right person to give you sexy lessons? You might as well have asked a trained ape."

"I didn't ask," Payson swore, holding her hands up in surrender. "He offered, and I was so freaked out about having to perform Lauren's routine that I had a moment of insanity and said yes."

Kaylie didn't know that story, but that was when she was still in rehab so it was understandable. It was a little harder to explain why she didn't know any of the other stories. She was beginning to realize that she didn't know Austin nearly as well as she thought she did.

For what was probably the twelfth time in three rounds of competition, Payson and Ava's faces flashed onto the JumboTron. Austin kept Ava out of the media as much as possible, but it didn't take long for word to spread that Austin Tucker's sister was sitting in the stands with Payson, and the cameras were having a field day with it. They cut to the two of them as often as possible. Neither girl noticed the attention. They were too busy either talking about Austin or watching him compete.

He was leading Nicky by five hundredths of a point going into the fourth rotation, and that lead would only increase because his worst apparatus was over. If he did his upgraded p-bars routine he would be ahead by a gigantic number.

Kaylie really didn't understand what he and Sasha were thinking when they put that set together. Lots of people have more difficult routines in their back pocket, but not one that was six tenths of a point higher in difficulty. Why didn't they just incorporate some of those skills into his normal routine for a more moderate increase in score?

Her thoughts weren't the only ones turned in that direction. Beside her Lauren asked, "Is Austin doing his upgrades?"

"If he is I'll strangle him," Payson said. "He promised he wouldn't."

Beth leaned around Emily to join the conversation. "I don't get it. Why are you so dead-set against him doing that routine? I mean, I know it's dangerous, but so is everything we do."

"That routine goes beyond dangerous and into stupid, especially considering that he doesn't practice it on a regular basis. He's going to kill himself if he keeps doing it."

"And if he did that I'd bring him back to life and kill him again," Ava insisted. "He ought to do whatever the hell Payson wants him to do right now, and she's right to ask him not to do it. There are more important things than winning."

Beth looked a little confused by Ava's speech, but she didn't comment on it. That was one of the things that was so great about Beth and Andrea. They let things slide.

Lauren, with all her usual tact, said, "You know, people are going to think Austin's whipped when he gives up a medal on parallel bars just because you asked him to."

"Oh my God, don't you dare say that in front of him!" Payson said. "Don't you know that you never, ever say the w-word to guys?"

"Even if it's true?" Kaylie teased. This, at least, was something that she felt comfortable with. They joked around about everything.

Payson crossed her arms and pouted. "It is not true. He's not whipped, he's just… responsible."

"Oh yeah, he's _real_ responsible," Kelly said. "Tell me again how you ended up together?"

Payson looked around like someone might be spying on them. "Can we not talk about this while we're surrounded by thousands of people?"

"Don't worry, Payson," Ava said, giving her a condescending pat on the knee. "Whatever people might think about him not doing that routine will be counteracted by the fact that he's nailing you."

Everyone except Payson and Ava cracked up. Payson glared while trying really hard not to smile, and Ava acted like she hadn't said anything unusual at all. Kaylie couldn't believe how casual Ava was about the whole situation. She didn't even want to think about the fact that Leo might be having sex, much less make jokes about it.

"By the way, Kel," Payson said, "I really appreciate how you mentioned that fact on national television."

"Hey, don't snap at me," Kelly said, leaning away as if Payson's biting sarcasm could _actually_ bite. "MJ told me to do that."

"She what?"

At the end of the isle, Sasha stopped watching Daniel Purvis on bars and turned toward them. "Girls, I really don't think this is the appropriate place to have this conversation. Austin's about to compete, and I'm sure he'd appreciate it if you cheered for him."

They did just that, but Kaylie was glad for the brief teasing because it broke the ice. She didn't feel nearly as awkward being around Ava when she just thought of her as a combination of Austin and Payson. In fact, she bet their kid would be exactly like his sister.

o-O-o

In the end, Austin won by a point and a half. The success the USA was having at these Olympics was epic. The men came out of nowhere to take the team gold, the women won with a record breaking lead, and the last man to win the All Around by such a margin was Sasha in 2000. Nicky was disappointed with his bronze, but it was still a medal and he would cheer up when he won gold on either rings or vault, or possibly both.

For the second time that day, he got hit by a tiny brunette torpedo. It had been a year, so he'd forgotten just how much he loved getting tackled by Ava. She never held back on anything. It was both her greatest strength and biggest downfall. She didn't do anything by halves, which had a huge impact on the development of her eating disorder. It also helped her get better, though. Once she accepted that she had a problem, she threw herself head first into rehab.

"You were awesome!" She yelled, thumping him on the shoulder. "Way to kick ass!"

She stepped back to give Payson a chance to see him, whose greeting was much more subdued. She smiled and said, "You're four for ten now."

"I guess I am," he agreed. "Four gold medals. I'm officially tied with Sasha."

They stood grinning at each other for about thirty seconds before Payson broke down and kissed him. They got carried away in each other until Ava cleared her throat behind them.

Payson was scarlet with embarrassment when she pulled away, and he was pretty sure his face was red, too. "Uhh… sorry, A."

"Whatever," she said, waving a dismissive hand. "As long as you keep your hands where I can see them I don't care. I just thought that I should remind you that you're standing in the middle of the Olympic Stadium and this is not a good place for foreplay."

Yup, just like he remembered. Ava didn't hold back on anything. "Okay, I don't ever want to hear those words come out of your mouth again. It's disturbing."

He didn't want to spend the next hour dragging Ava and Payson around the gym while he talked to reporters, so he led them over to sit on the side of the vault run and let the reporters come to him. It was one of the benefits of being the best. He didn't have to chase after the attention; wherever he went, the media followed.

It was fun just sitting with his girlfriend and his sister, basking in the glory of his win. He was so glad that Ava was there to support him. Kevin had been awesome with her, giving her a seat in Team USA's designated spot in the stands and pulling some strings to get her a floor pass. Kevin had been coaching Austin on the National Team for five years, and he was one of the few people in the world who knew the complexities of the Tucker family. He was a huge support system, and Austin was glad that he knew about the pregnancy. In a lot of ways, Kevin was the father that Robert Tucker never could be. Austin would definitely be modeling his parenting style after his coach rather than his biological father.

There was a brief lull in the interviews while two reporters argued amongst themselves about who would be next. Beside him Payson asked, "So what does your agent think about this? You just sitting up here with us, I mean."

"Oh, he loves it. It makes me look like I don't care about the press, which increases my badassness."

"So what does he think about you and Payson?" Ava asked.

"He loves that, too." He had been surprised by that. His agent _hated_ when he dated Kaylie but was thrilled when Austin and Payson showed up at Denver International Airport together. "He said that Payson is every guy's wet dream and it made me look good to be with her."

Payson dropped her head into her hand. "Oh my God, I hate it when people say stuff like that about me. It's so embarrassing."

"You should be flattered," he insisted. "Every guy in the world wants to be with you, and so do a lot of the women. It's a good thing."

She grumbled a response, but one of the reporters won the fight before he could ask her to repeat it. He BSed his way through another few interviews until Payson's head drooped onto his shoulder. He stopped the interview and the three of them walked back to the locker room.

They stopped outside the door and Payson leaned against the wall. Ava looked worried; this was the first time she'd seen Payson wear down.

"I'm sorry," he said, "I should have got you back to the Village a long time ago. Just give me a minute to change and we'll go."

She shook her head. "No. You just won the All Around, and you haven't seen Ava in a year." She glanced to his sister and then back to him. "The two of you should go out and celebrate."

"You can't go back to the Village alone, Pay."

She tugged on the zipper of his USA tracksuit and pulled him in for a kiss. "Don't worry about me, babe. Go celebrate. Sasha can stay with me tonight." Her smile turned wicked. "It's better that way, anyway. If you stayed with me we would end up having sex, and I probably shouldn't be doing that the night before the All Around."

"Oh, gag," came Ava's voice from behind them.

Payson stared down his sister and then pulled him in for a hard, passionate kiss. When she released him, she shared another look with Ava, who raised an eyebrow in response. There was a long, heavy silence and then Ava barked out a laugh and Payson joined her.

He wasn't sure if Payson had just challenged Ava or if she was responding to a challenge that his sister laid down, but one thing was clear: he was in trouble. They'd only known each other for a few hours, and already they were speaking their own language. He was already confused by each of them separately. Now he had the rest of his life to look forward to being confused by the two of them together.

"Uhh, guys? Next time you have a battle of wills, can you leave me out of it?" That just made them laugh harder, so he gave up and left them standing outside the door while he went to shower and change.

When he came out they were still there, but Payson must have called Sasha, because he was standing with them. Looking at them, Austin had a flash of his future. This would be a picture that he would see many times in his life, he was sure. Sasha would always be a huge part of Payson's life, and a huge part of Austin's by proxy, and Ava and Payson were already becoming a family. The baby was bringing them all together in a way that would never have been possible otherwise.

The women were so caught up in their conversation that they didn't even notice him, but Sasha did. "Congratulations, mate," he said, offering a hand to shake. Austin thought that maybe things were finally good between them again.

"Thanks, man. I know I owe a lot of it to you, so… thanks." He saw Payson roll her eyes at the awkward guy moment. Sasha was offering an olive branch, so he decided that he would offer one as well. "Take care of Pay for me tonight, alright?"

"I will." It was a given that Sasha would take care of her, but it was their way of calling a truce. Austin's question held an apology and an assurance that he didn't resent Sasha's role in Payson's life; Sasha's answer was an acceptance and a promise that he wouldn't betray Austin's trust. And it was enough.

As Payson and Sasha left, Ava asked, "Did I just witness some kind of weird male bonding ritual? Should there have been cameras for the Nature Chanel hanging around to film that?"

He shoved her. "Shut up."

"So you're really okay with somebody that hot sleeping with your girlfriend?"

"Yeah, I trust—" He cut himself off when he processed her words. "Wait, you think Sasha is hot?"

She scoffed. "I don't get it. Girls know when other girls are hot, so how is it that guys are completely oblivious? Yeah, Sasha is hot. It would take a blind idiot not to notice that."

In a strange way, it made him feel better to know that Ava thought Sasha was attractive. He couldn't blame Sasha for being attracted to Payson, because, like said before, every guy in the world and a lot of the women were turned on by her. He just never thought about women having the same kind of response to a man. If other women were that attracted to Sasha, then he couldn't really blame Payson, either.

"Well, anyway," he said, clearing his throat, "I trust them. Payson says she's one hundred percent committed to me, and I believe her. Even if Sasha wanted more, which I'm pretty sure now that he doesn't, he would never do anything that would hurt her."

"Yeah, I kind of get that vibe, too," she admitted. "I just wanted to make sure that you were really okay with it. Nobody would blame you if you weren't."

Sometimes he thought his parents had their kids in the wrong order. Ava acted so much like a big sister that she should have been born first. "I wasn't for a long time. But I get it now." He couldn't explain it without sounding like a girl, but he finally understood that just because Payson and Sasha loved each other, it didn't mean that they were _in_ love with each other. That also kind of made him understand where he and Payson were headed. When things fizzled out between them, they would have the kind of relationship that Payson and Sasha had now, and that was the next best thing to being romantically involved.

"Okay," he said, "We've talked about me long enough. It's time to celebrate."

"So we're going to go from talking about you to celebrating you?"

He shoved her. "Shut up. Actually, though, I know this is supposed to be you and me time, but would you mind if we brought Nicky along wherever we go?"

"Yeah, sure," she said, giving him an appraising look, "But I thought you didn't like him?"

"I don't, really, but he's kind of alone here, and I know how that feels." He'd had plenty of people to celebrate with him in Beijing, but the vast majority of them he didn't even know. His family wasn't there and he was too new to have any real friends on the team, so he just got trashed with them and pretended like he was happy with the arrangement. Nicky wasn't the kind to get trashed, so if Austin didn't drag him out he would just end up back at the village playing Call of Duty with Jake and Steven like it was any normal night.

As it turned out, Nicky wasn't that easy to find. He wasn't out on the floor talking to the few reporters still floating around, and he hadn't been to the locker room yet to change. They asked around and followed a trail that eventually led to Nana's Flat, the deceptively lame front room to the North Greenwich Arena's triple-decker backstage area.

"Hey, Nicky," he said, swinging the door open, "You're coming out with me and Ava whether you like it or n—"

Austin wasn't sure who was more surprised, Kelly and Nicky at seeing him, or him at seeing them together. They were just sitting together talking, but by the look on their faces you would think they were caught in flagrante delicto. They might as well have been for all the surprise they caused, because the two of them together was the last thing Austin expected to find.

He couldn't think of anything to say, so he went with the less than eloquent "Uhh… hi."

o-O-o

Nicky was hiding. He hated all of the publicity crap, and even more so when he was the loser. He didn't want to hang around the arena and listen to people congratulate him for failure.

He knew she could find him if she wanted to. She always could. He just wasn't sure if she would want to.

"Hi, Nick." Apparently she did.

He looked up from the bronze medal in his hands to see Kelly framed in the door. It was uncanny how similar it was to the last time he saw her, when she stood in the doorway of the men's locker room watching him pack. Except this time she wasn't crying.

He didn't know what to say, so he didn't say anything at all. Half the time they spent together was silent, anyway. She came inside and sat down next to him, but they didn't speak for another several minutes. It felt like old times.

He took a moment just to look at her. It had been months since they talked, and she'd changed so much. He kept expecting her to call him—when she won/lost with a bronze medal at Worlds, when she split with her mom, when she made the Olympic team—but she never did. She wasn't the same girl he fell in love with all that time ago. She'd grown up.

"You should be proud, you know."

He sighed and let the ribbon from his medal slip through his fingers. "I know I should be. That doesn't mean I am."

"I figured. You and me, always second best, right?" she said. He forgot sometimes that she was in the same boat as him. He'd never be able to live up to Austin and she'd never be able to live up to Payson.

"You sound… surprisingly okay with that." He never thought that Kelly Parker would accept anything less than gold.

"I surprisingly am. I don't know, Nick. It's just… so much has happened. I gave up so much for this sport, and I always thought it was worth it, but now I don't know. Watching Payson and Austin… that could have been us."

"What, you could be sick and I could follow you around like a lost puppy?" It was supposed to be a joke, but it came out a little bitter.

Kelly glared at him. "That's not funny, Nick. You have no idea what's they're going through."

"I know, I'm sorry." He dropped his medal down on the table beside him. "I'm just so tired of hearing about them. It's bad enough that they always win, but now nobody will shut up about what a perfect couple they are."

"Damnit, Nick, just stop! Stop talking about things you don't know about! They aren't a perfect couple, life isn't that easy for them. It's hard, really hard, but they're facing it together instead of running away like we did."

It was the first time he'd ever heard her yell. When she broke up with him, she was crying but her voice was flat and emotionless. Now her eyes were dry but she was yelling. It didn't make any kind of sense.

"What's going on, Parks? Why do you care so much about Payson and Austin?"

She took a deep breath and he knew that she was building up to something big. "There are things you don't know. About the reason that I broke things off between us."

It was the conversation he'd been waiting on for nearly a year. He never understood what went wrong, and not knowing was killing him.

The universe was working against him, though, because just as Kelly opened her mouth to tell him, Austin barged into the room. "Hey, Nicky, you're coming out with me and Ava whether you like it or n—"

Kelly looked like a deer caught in the headlights, and Nicky was sure that he didn't look any better. Nobody knew that he and Kelly had a past and that was the way he liked to keep it. Thinking about Kelly hurt bad enough already; he didn't need other people nosing around asking questions about it.

"Uhh… hi," Austin said. "Sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt anything."

"It's fine," Kelly said, cutting off anything that he might have said in response. "I was just telling Nick congratulations. I should get back to the Village, anyway. Big day tomorrow and all that."

Nicky was about the tell Austin where he could shove it, but Kelly anticipated him and said, "You should go with them. Celebrate." She leaned over and kissed him on the cheek. "You did good, Nick. Be proud."

He couldn't let her leave that easily. "But what about…"

"Tomorrow. We'll talk tomorrow."

She congratulated Austin on her way out and told Ava it was nice to meet her, and then he was alone with them. Both men were shifting around uncomfortably, but Ava didn't seem to be affected in the same way. She watched Kelly walk down the hallway and then turned back to them and said, "So… that was your ex-girlfriend, right?"

Nicky blushed and Austin sputtered, and in the end she gave them an out. "Okay, none of my business, I get that. We're going to Café de Paris, you coming?"

"Uh, isn't that a cabaret club?"

She grinned. "Yup. You don't happen to have a fake ID, do you?"

He wondered if Kelly would still have told him to go with them if she knew what the plan was. "No. So I guess I can't go." He tried to put some fake disappointment in the statement, but judging by the look on Austin's face, he didn't pull it off.

"Of course you can," he said, slapping Nicky on the back. "We'll just have a bribe a few people. No worries."

Austin might not have worries, but Nicky did. Lots of them.

o-O-o

Ava was an evil genius. Café de Paris was her idea, and Austin didn't understand the choice until well after they got there. It was a clever, sneaky, brilliant way to get Nicky out of his shell.

Their table was on the edge of the balcony, directly above the burlesque show happening on the main stage. Nicky was resolutely looking away from the dancers below them, his face the color of a boiled lobster, but it was impossible to ignore a beautiful woman taking off her clothes unless you had something else to concentrate on. He had no choice but to talk to them.

Ava was regaling them with the details of her life for the past year, veering off to give backstory to Nicky whenever it was called for, and she had them in stitches. Nicky's quiet reserve extended even into his laughter; his shoulders shook and his eyes watered, but he didn't make any sound. Watching him was hilarious in and of itself.

Once she got him relaxed, she turned the conversation away from herself. "So what's your next step, Nicky? Are you headed for Rio 2016?"

"No, I don't think so," he answered, already pulling back into his shell. The kid really didn't like attention. "I'll probably go to school, or maybe coach somewhere, but I think I'm done competing."

Austin choked on his drink. "You're retiring? _Why_? You're only twenty, you've probably got two more cycles in you."

He didn't answer, but Austin figured it out for himself. He didn't think he was good enough.

"Listen, Nicky, you've gotta cut yourself some slack. I know you wanted gold, but there's still plenty of time for that. You're just a kid."

"You were younger than me when you won in Beijing," he said, full of self-flagellation. "And Sasha was my age in Sydney."

Nicky Russo had always been the dorky kid that he made fun of, but now Austin was starting to feel sorry for him. Nick Russo, Sr. must be a real douchebag to give his son an inferiority complex this big. "Okay, first off, comparing yourself to Sasha would be like any of the girls comparing themselves to Payson. It's an impossible standard. None of us are ever going to live up to him."

"You won by the same margin as he did today," Nicky reminded him.

"Yeah, but it's not the same. I'm in the best shape of my life and I had Payson and A in the stands to support me. Sasha won on a destroyed knee after his mom died, his dad stopped speaking to him, and his girlfriend dumped him for the competition. And as for me winning in Beijing… I got lucky. I'm willing to admit that. I had nothing to lose so I pulled some crazy stunts and it paid off."

Nicky had obviously spent a long time thinking about his own inadequacy, because he had an automatic response. "Didn't you win with a hangover?"

He cultivated that rumor, partly to cover the truth, partly to build his reputation, and partly to intimidate the competition. The message came across clear: I'm better drunk than you are sober. He just never realized how effective that mind game had been. It was time to tell the truth. "Okay, if you tell anybody this I'll beat the shit out of you, but the hangover stuff was a lie. My eyes were bloodshot so people assumed, and I let them because I didn't want anyone to know the truth. The reason I looked like hell was because I'd been crying."

That got Nicky's attention, and he stopped beating himself up long enough to listen. Beside him, Ava sat up straighter in her chair. She didn't know about this. Kevin was the only person who did.

"Why?" Nick asked.

He took a big gulp of his Jack and Coke before he attempted an explanation. "Our dad is a real bastard. He never hit us or anything, but he made an art form out of making us feel like shit about ourselves. Only time Mom every stood up to him was when I wanted to move to Dallas to train. She waited 'til he passed out drunk one night, shoved all our clothes in a bag, dragged his ass to the car and drove all night. It's not like it mattered what state we lived in, he didn't have a job anyway, but he was pissed. Pretty much stopped speaking to me after that, which was an improvement, really, but for some dumbass reason I still wanted his approval."

He saw understanding in Nicky's eyes. Unemployed alcoholics didn't have the market cornered on being bastards. There was plenty of room for high powered orthopedic surgeons in that club, too. "I called him, right before the finals. I guess I thought he'd be proud or something, that I'd made it so far, but he wasn't. He made fun of me for being ranked 18th. Called me a loser. By the time he hung up I was ready to drop out of the finals and quit gymnastics altogether."

"But you didn't," Nicky said, like he was reminding them all of how things turned out. "You won."

"Yeah, Kevin talked me out of quitting. And I figured, hey, I don't have a chance in hell of winning, so if I'm going to lose I might as well lose big. I threw every trick I had. It was stupid beyond belief, but it worked. It didn't matter to him, though. I could have won every gold medal there was to win and it wouldn't be enough. There are some people you just can't please."

Austin couldn't remember the last time he talked so much about himself, especially about his family, but he figured that Nicky needed to hear it, and it was almost relieving to tell the truth. He'd made up so much shit about his parents over the years that he'd lost track of the lies, and it was getting too complicated.

Ava leaned against him and wrapped her arms around his waist. Austin protected her as much as he could while they were growing up, and he got her the hell away from their parents' house as soon as he had enough money, so a lot of this was news to her.

Nicky broke what could have turned into an emotional moment. "So… was that your way of telling me not to retire?"

"Yeah," Austin said, laughing. Nicky wasn't quite as bad at the social stuff as they all thought. This was the second time in as many days that he'd moved the conversation away from an uncomfortable topic before it got too tense. "Keep working and come back and kick my ass in Rio."

He raised his glass in a toast. "I'll take that challenge. I'll see you from the gold medal podium in four years."

Overall, Austin thought Ava's plan worked pretty well. She definitely got Nicky Russo out of his slump.

* * *

><p>AN: A few acknowledgements—Ava belongs to Romance Novel, and I've basically stolen the entire Nickelly universe from Creatively Licensed B. And there were a couple of Firefly reference in there :)

There are pictures of Ava on my pinterest in the board titled "Amor Fati," and a little video explaining Nana's flat that Nicky was in is linked to my profile. I tried to put links in here, but I guess the website got savvy to all the normal trick to inserting web addresses, because all the spaces in the world or symbols replaced by words can't make them show up right.

The four words from last chapter were "At least not yet." And to answer a question that a few of you had, the story isn't ending soon, but me writing it hopefully will be, at which point I'm going to post gigantic chapters every other day.

As for the real Olympics, I have one thing to say: Aly! I knew she was going to be amazing, and she totally was!


	52. Chapter 52

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

A/N: I know I was supposed to post this yesterday, but I got home from work, fell asleep, and then didn't wake up for the next 15 hours. Which probably gives you a little bit of an idea of why I went missing for a couple of weeks ;) Life is crazy right now.

There are definitely sections of this that are an ode to writer's block. I just started writing random stuff to get past the block and I left it in as a tribute lol.

* * *

><p>Kaylie was in a strange sort of limbo when it came to practice. Lauren and Emily were training one event each. Kaylie was training all four, but she would never get to perform them. She wasn't in any of the finals, but she was the alternate in the All Around, vault, beam, and floor, so she couldn't just stop training. This would be her last day to train bars. Ever. She would drop off one apparatus at a time as her best friends performed in, and likely won, the event finals.<p>

At the moment, Payson and Kelly's training situation was even more unusual. As in, they weren't. Lauren, Emily, Kaylie, and Marty got up at their usual time and took a bus over to the practice gym. Payson, Kelly, and Sasha slept in.

Sasha said that they needed rest more than practice, so they were taking the morning off and coming in after lunch for a light warm up before moving to the arena. It was an unconventional strategy to say the least, and it had the added benefit of intimidating the hell out of the competition. Word had spread to the other teams (through Lauren) that the American's were sleeping in, and it was screwing with everybody's heads. Lo had cultivated an extensive network of spies, and the word coming in from the international practice gym was that Genghi and Ivanka were both having a rough day.

Kelly and Payson got mobbed when they walked into the gym. The girls rushed to them in one chaotic, excited hug where lots of words flew around, including "good luck," "kick ass," "I love you," and "I'm so proud of you." Kaylie wasn't sure what surprised her most—that she was saying these things to Kelly, too, or that she actually meant them.

She thought it would be hard, watching her friends get ready for the All Around while she sat on the sidelines, but it wasn't. It almost felt… relieving. Kelly and Payson were excited for the All Around because they _loved_ doing gymnastics. Kaylie stopped loving it around the time she became an elite, when everything became about winning. She never felt the drive to be the best like they did; she just felt the pressure. Now that the pressure was gone she could have fun again. It was nice.

The men came to wish them luck, too, and Austin drew Payson away from the crowd. They stood together making out like their friends weren't just a few feet away, and Kaylie was surprised by how much emotion seemed to be in the kiss. The progression of Austin and Payson's relationship was so confusing that Kaylie couldn't keep track. First they were friends, and then Austin went crazy over her and she didn't even notice, and then they hated each other. Then the girls found out they were dating and a few days later found out that it was all a lie, that Payson was just hooking up with him, which turned into a weird pseudo-relationship and now was a _real_ relationship. But there was something going on between Sasha and Payson for a while there, too, and Payson kept insisting that it wasn't romantic even though it damn well seemed like it was. Now all Payson would say about her relationship with Sasha was that nothing had changed but they were "being more careful." Who would have ever thought that Payson Keeler would have such a complicated love life?

Nobody else was competing until at least Sunday, so they decided to take the afternoon off and cheer on Kelly and Payson while they practiced. It must have been a surreal feeling for them to be the sole athletes working in the large gym while five men, three women, and four coaches sat around watching them and cheering. There was a fair amount of heckling from Steven and Jake, as well, which kept the whole gym laughing. Someone should be recording this, Kaylie thought, to show the world just what a strange and wonderful family they were.

Sasha wasn't kidding when he said that they were going to have a light warm up. They practiced their tumbling and ran through their choreography, but they didn't put the two together, and neither of them did a full bars set. All they did was loosen up their muscles and mark their timing before they left for the arena. As was the case during the team finals, they were relaxed and smiling. Nobody could touch them and they knew it.

The girls went with them to the locker room when they got to the North Greenwich Arena. They were sharing the room with several other finalists, all of who were looking at the Americans with a bit of fear and awe. It was intimidating enough just being in the same room with Payson and Kelly, much less when they were laughing and joking around just an hour before the biggest competition of their lives. It meant that they were either incredibly self-assured or a little bit crazy.

Lauren did the hair and make up for both of them, and the last thing they did before heading out for the official warm up period was change into their competition leos. Then they gathered their belongings and turned to go, but when Payson and Kelly faced each other full on for the first time since coming into the locker room, they both burst out laughing.

Lauren glanced back and forth between them and asked, "Did you guys just go insane?"

Kelly was clutching at her stomach, but she managed to choke out, "The purple!"

"The blue!" Payson cried in response.

Purple and blue were the colors of their leos, but Kaylie had no idea what was so funny about that. Apparently Emily did, because she started giggling.

"Can someone explain this to me? Because I'm not following."

"It's just so _Payson_," Kelly said, reining in her laughter. "I haven't seen her in anything but red, white, and blue since we got here, but _of course_ she would wear purple when she got to choose her own. I don't know why I didn't realize that before."

Kaylie took a second look at Payson's attire. It was two different shades of purple, a rich dark velvet and lighter spandex sleeves, and suddenly it occurred to her that of the several dozen leos that Payson owned, nearly all of them were purple. Why had she never noticed that before?

With that revelation in mind, she looked at Kelly again and realized that she had a signature color, too. They had been on the same competitive circuit since they were twelve, but somehow Kaylie had missed the fact that her teammate almost never wore anything but blue. The two-toned blue leo and devil horns were so familiar that they looked natural on her, like she might have been born that way. An image danced through Kaylie's head of an infant Kelly wearing blue spandex and her hair in buns. She snorted.

"Hey, at least it's not pink," Payson said, holding her hands up in defense of her color choice.

Kaylie glared at her. "What's wrong with pink?"

Kelly ushered them all toward the door as she said, "It's pink. Enough said."

She wanted to respond, but an event coordinator stepped in and herded Payson and Kelly toward the competition area and shooed the rest of them away, so they made their way up to the stands to meet the men.

Ava was already there with them, managing to look like a super model wearing nothing but jeans and a men's Team USA polo tied up at the waist. She waved them over.

"Hey, Emily," she said, indicating for the bars-specialist to sit next to her, "I downloaded Damon's album last night and listened to it. I'm guessing seven of those were about you?"

"Actually, it's nine, right?" Kaylie said, looking to Emily for validation.

She shook her head. "No, Ava's right, it's seven. Most people guess nine, but two of those he wrote before he met me. How did you know?"

"I don't know, they just sound totally different. And Black Widow, that's about you, isn't it?" she asked Lauren.

"Yes," she said with a frustrated huff. "And he thinks it's so funny. It's not nearly as clever as he thinks it is."

Ava chuckled. "It kinda is. All those gymnastics references that nobody else would ever notice, like the line about the high heels where he talks about 'the way her hips sway while she balances on those four inches,' and the clock going tic toc, and then that hilarious line about mounting."

Lauren _hated_ that song. Mentioning it was a guaranteed way to make her snap at you, but for some reason she didn't tell off Ava the way Kaylie expected her to. She just said, "Yeah, you think it's hilarious now. Just wait until he writes something embarrassing about you."

"Well, when he does you have my permission to make fun of me. I'm pretty hard to embarrass, though."

It was a casual statement, but there seemed to be a deeper meaning to it, like she was saying that she would be around for Lauren to make fun of her. Like maybe she was planning to stay.

o-O-o

Mental toughness. Some people have it, some people don't. Ava Tucker had it in spades. She just had this one, tiny chink in her armor. And it kept getting bigger and bigger until it took over her entire life.

It had been three years, and every single day she woke up and had to tell herself that she didn't need to be perfect. She was fine the way she was. Most days she believed it. Because she had that mental toughness.

Payson Keeler had it, too. The whole world thought she was perfect, but Ava knew the truth. She was just as broken as Ava was. She was scared, and sick, and she had no idea what she was doing—with the baby, with Austin, with her life—but she woke up every morning _didn't_ need to be perfect. She was fine the way she was. She didn't have to convince herself because she knew it was true. Ava was more than a little jealous of that.

She watched the women's qualifying on television. She watched the Secret U.S. Classic, and Nationals, and Olympic trials, too. She hadn't watched, talked about, or done gymnastics since the day she fell off the bars and got taken to the hospital in an ambulance, but when Austin started talking about Payson Keeler she knew that something had to change. He didn't talk about her the way he talked about any of the models he dated, or even the way he talked about that Kaylie girl. It was different. _She_ was different. So one day Ava turned on the TV and flipped to Universal Sports and watched Payson Keeler perform Swan Lake.

That very first day at the Olympics, when she performed on the floor, she brought the whole world to tears. She brought Ava to her knees. It was an expression of pain, fear, and desperation—all the things that Ava battled on a daily basis—and it brought those feelings flooding to the surface. She sat on the floor of her Dallas apartment and cried for hours after she watched that routine, not even noticing the rest of the competition, but when the tears stopped falling she felt… cleansed, somehow.

The next morning, she didn't have to fight her demons quite so hard. She watched Austin compete and it didn't hurt quite so much. She packed her bags to go to London and wasn't quite so scared.

The problems the two girls were facing weren't similar, not even close, but somehow their journeys seemed linked, probably because Austin loved them both so much. So when she sat in the stands at the Women's All Around finals and watched Payson dance out her hope, it gave Ava hope to. For the first time in years, she looked ahead and saw a future that made her smile. She was going to be an aunt.

Austin wrapped his arms around her shoulders and pulled her closer. It had been a long time since he did that, or, rather, it had been a long time since she'd let him do that. In the darkest times she didn't let people touch her. She went for an entire year without touching another human being except for Austin, who never stopped trying. He didn't care that she pushed him away every time; he would do it anyway. She saw how happy he was when he introduced her to his friends and she hugged them, just like she would have _before_.

"She looks so much better today," he said. "We're two rotations in and she doesn't even look tired yet."

"Didn't you say she just had a transfusion yesterday, though? Will this last?"

Emily, on her other side, said, "She'll still probably go downhill again, but it doesn't seem like it's happening as fast. If you'd seen her before… This is a huge improvement."

"So what's changed?" Ava asked. "I mean, I know she's on that medicine now, but it can't have worked that fast."

"Probably not," Austin agreed, "It's probably just starting to kick in, but even a small difference in her blood makes a huge difference in everything else. And things have been a lot better for her here, she's not getting as sick and she's getting a lot more sleep, so I'm sure that's helping."

"Do you think she's going to be okay?" There was a lot of fear in her question, and for a lot of reasons. She was scared for Austin, because he loved Payson so much and she didn't want him to lose her; she was scared for the baby, because as crazy and unexpected as that development was, she loved that kid already; she was scared for herself, because she way too invested in Payson's wellbeing for her own good. She _needed_ Payson to be okay.

Austin gave her shoulder a comforting squeeze. "She will be. She's a fighter, just like you."

She threw off her melancholy with a toss of her head, and lightened the mood by saying, "Well, obviously, just look at how well she's fighting tonight. She's kicking ass."

She was. She'd scored a record-breaking 16.7 on beam, higher even than Lauren had ever scored, and a giant 16.35 on floor. She was 1.7 points ahead after just two rotations, so as long as she could keep up her energy she would have no problem taking the gold. She could even take a fall and still win. Of course, she was trying to avoid falls at all costs to protect the baby, so that wasn't likely to happen.

Kelly was holding her own, too, edging out Ivanka for 2nd by a few hundredths of a point. The two girls had traded out best and worst apparatuses during the first two rotations. Kelly was weak on beam and strong on floor, while Ivanka was great on beam and weak on floor, so they were neck and neck so far, but Kelly was better on both vault and bars. Barring disaster, Kelly Parker would be the silver medalist and Payson the gold medalist. Bronze was still up for grabs between Genghi and Ivanka.

Ava heard Lauren, sitting a couple of seats away, say, "I really hate the vault rotation during finals. It's always the exact same vault over and over again."

She was right, at least for the rotation that Payson and Kelly were in. The top six ranking girls were grouped together, and Payson was the only one of them not doing a Yurchenko. There were two doubles from the Chinese gymnasts and three two and a halves from the other girls. It was boring as hell.

"Why do Genghi and Jinnin do doubles?" Ava asked. "Especially Genghi, being a medal contender. Why not an Amanar?"

"They don't weigh enough." Lauren threw the answer out offhandedly, and an uncomfortable silence settled over the group. Lauren winced when she realized what she said, but she didn't apologize for it, which Ava appreciated. She hated when people walked on egg shells around her.

"Huh. That's an object lesson, isn't it? Too skinny for silver. Because she'd have a good shot at beating Kelly if she had an Amanar."

Emily took the opportunity to change the subject and ran with it. "Yeah, maybe, but it would still really be a toss up. Even if Genghi had that extra seven tenths, Kelly would be stiff competition."

"Does anyone else think it's kind of weird how the U.S. is dominating this year?" It was unbelievable how well they were doing. Nastia and Shawn set a really high standard in '08, but the 2012 gymnasts were just soaring past it.

"It's not weird," Austin said, "It's Sasha. He's the best coach in the world."

Nicky, on Austin's other side, elbowed him in the ribs and jerked his head toward the end of the row where Kevin was sitting. Austin hastily amended, "Uh, you know, the best Women's coach. Between Sasha and Kevin, of course we're doing well."

Ivanka increased her lead over Genghi to seven tenths, and then it was Kelly's turn to vault. All conversation was at an end while they cheered for her and watched while she did a near perfect vault. 15.975, close to the vault that beat Kaylie out of the event finals but still not quite that good.

Austin took her hand when Payson stepped up to the vault run. He was never that demonstrative of his worry—with the one exception that she never thought about—so he was really nervous. She would be to, in his position. Hell, she was worried in _her_ position. Just one fall could be catastrophic to the pregnancy.

It was over before she could think too hard about it. Payson was running toward the vault and flying through the air, and then she landed light as a feather, like her half on, one and a half off was no big deal. Her lead over Kelly increased to nearly two points.

One more rotation to go.

* * *

><p>AN: As always, pictures of the leos on my pinterest :) The website is on my profile, as is the link from the last chapter if you missed that. The site has figured out all of the sneaky tricks we use to put in web links and got rid of them.

If anyone would like to write me lyric for the song "Black Widow," I would love you forever. Maybe even enough to give you a scene from Sasha's POV ;)


	53. Chapter 53

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

A/N: Farfallama won you all a little bit of Sasha/Payson by writing me some awesome song lyrics :) (Btw, Farfallama, do you mind if I share those?)

I had a choice between making this chapter a lot short or a little long, and I chose the long option. The flip side of that is that the next chapter will be just a tad shorter than my standard 2000-ish words.

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><p>Payson was having a conversation with Austin across the stadium. Not just a few mouthed words exchanged. A whole conversation.<p>

"How do you even understand each other?" he asked, walking up beside her. "I couldn't tell you a single word that Austin just said."

"You and I have conversations by just looking at each other. Try explaining that."

He stopped to consider and realized that she had a point. He couldn't explain the way he and Payson communicated, so he shouldn't expect her to be able to explain how she communicated with Austin. "Good point. Forget I asked. How are you feeling?"

She didn't answer immediately, so he knew the answer wasn't simple. She was trying to figure it out. "Better than I thought I'd be," she said. "Not great, but not horrible. I can definitely finish out."

"Good. Because I really want another banner for the front of the Rock."

She rolled her eyes at his joke. "You know, I think we're going to have to move some of those. The front of our building is getting a little full."

She was right. Kaylie's National Champion banner had long since been moved inside to make room for the several banners from Worlds, where Austin and each of the four girls took home individual medals, but those wins would be eclipsed by Olympic medals over the next week.

"We'll take all of the old ones inside," he suggested. "Are we getting banners for Austin?"

The real question was, is Austin coming back to train at the Rock? The reason he was thrown out was because of what happened with Payson, so now that they had worked things out, the door was open for him to come back.

"I think so," she said. "But we haven't talked about it. I'll ask him later tonight."

"It would be the perfect set up, you coaching and him training. You'd always be together."

Payson stretched out while she talked, getting ready for bars. She was last to go, but the time always flew at the end of a competition like this. "Me coaching at the Rock is the perfect set up altogether, I think. Austin's there, you're there, mom and Becca are there. On the other hand, though, I'll be surrounded by over protective people who want to take me to the hospital every time I so much as yawn."

"Very funny. Just wait until you're better and we all finally allow ourselves to have mental breakdowns. Then you'll have to take care of all of us." It was mostly a joke, but he did think that he, Kim, and Austin were holding it together out of sheer willpower.

Payson didn't even watch the other girls perform, which was a good thing, and he pretended that he wasn't watching either. Being able to watch something out of the corner of your eye was a necessary skill as a coach, and he was putting it to good use. Elisabeta edged out Jinnin, and Ivanka did a decent job with a 15.675. It would be really close between Ivanka and Genghi. Ivanka had a seven tenths lead going in, but Genghi was capable of gigantic scores on bars, on the same level as Emily, so that could bridge the gap.

As it turned out, it did. Genghi had a six tenths DOD advantage over Ivanka on the bars and better execution, so she ended up taking the bronze by less than two tenths of a point. That's how he thought of it in his head, at least, which was a bad idea. He wouldn't know that Genghi had the bronze until after Payson and Kelly competed.

He and Payson both wished Kelly luck before she took the podium, and the Denver gymnast surprised him by giving them both a hug. There had been a huge change in Kelly over the past week, and all that Payson would tell him is that Kelly was dealing with a personal issue that had changed her outlook on some things. He didn't push because he knew that Payson wouldn't (and shouldn't) betray Kelly's confidence, but that didn't stop him from being curious as hell.

Kelly was fantastic, with barely an error to be deducted for. He gauged her at around a 9.1 execution, give or take a bit, and turned out to be spot on. She scored a 9.125, taking the silver by nearly a five tenths lead. But he really needed to stop assuming that Payson would win gold. It was bad luck.

The fear never went away when Payson was on the bars. Even knowing that she was well enough to perform, he still couldn't shake the now dual images of Payson falling in Boston and her collapsing into his arms on Saturday. He was terrified out of his mind for the entire minute that she was up there, and when she landed her double double stretched with just the slightest bend in her knees he was so relieved that he had to lean back against the bar rigging just to support himself. Then they were off the podium and she was hugging him and hugging Kelly, and then hugging them both at the same time. They talked and laughed and cried, and when her scores posted (did it even matter what they were?) and the two girls saw their names at the top of the scoreboard they both screamed.

The whole stadium was in an uproar, and his ears were ringing from the girls' scream, so he sidled up to Marty and said, "I'm not sure I'll ever be able to hear again. I think they burst my eardrums."

"Yeah, but can you blame them? Remember what it was like when we were up there?"

Memories of his time in Sydney flooded to the surface. His win was bittersweet; he was proud of his accomplishments, but he was also still reeling from the forced retirement that he knew was coming thanks to his busted up knee, MJ's betrayal, his mom's death, and his dad's disapproval. When he stood on the gold medal podium, he wasn't happy. Payson would be.

He'd known her for a little more than a year, but she never stopped surprising him. He was amazed by her capability to fight her way through anything, the joy that she found in gymnastics, and the way that she never stopped loving life no matter how bad things got. Thrown into the worst possible situation—pregnant, sick, and afraid for her life—she'd still managed to achieve her dreams and be happy doing it. As cheesy as it sounded, Payson Keeler was his hero.

She cried when her gold medal was placed around her neck, and so did he. She was an extraordinary woman and he was so proud to be a part of her life. Her win meant more to him than his own ever had.

o-O-o

Interviews. Hundreds of them. Photographs. Autographs. Flowers. Congratulations. Hugs. Tears.

Women were nuts.

Austin was psyched about his win, but nothing like this. People went over the top for Payson. She spent a full five minutes after the ceremony just sobbing into his chest, but that was forgivable, because she had a lot going on at the time. She was mostly crying out of joy, but it was coupled with profound relief. She and the baby had made it through safely, and even if she couldn't compete in the event finals she still had the All Around gold. But she would be able to compete, he knew, because she was getting better. Which was the most profound relief of all.

MJ had arranged a reception in the ballroom at the Dorchester, which Payson pointed out was a huge risk since it she might not have won. MJ scoffed at the idea, and, secretly, so did Austin. Of course she was going to win. There was never any doubt.

Payson looked gorgeous dressed in drapey white lace (even though Austin could only think about taking it off of her), but her behavior was, according to MJ, "atrocious." She danced exactly four times, once each with Austin, her dad, Sasha, and Marty, and sat at a table with her friends and family the rest of the time, not bothering to mingle. MJ wanted her to work the room and schmooze the hundreds of guest that none of them knew, but she politely said that she was tired and wanted to rest. When her agent persisted, Payson less than politely told her to go fuck herself. Austin was impressed with her ability to say something like that with a smile on her face and friendly tone of voice. Her friends laughed. Her parents looked horrified. Ava slapped him on the back and said, "You picked a winner, big brother. I like her."

His favorite part of the night, though, was the end of it, when he got to take Payson back to the Village and celebrate alone.

It turned out that the best part of being in a real relationship with Payson wasn't the sex; it was the talking. They laid together for hours discovering each other's pasts, dreaming of the future, reveling in the present. They talked about the baby endlessly.

He was trailing kisses along her stomach, making Payson laugh by whispering to the baby, while she ran her fingers through his hair. She was talking about decorating a nursery. "We want a house with four bedrooms so that you'll always have a place to stay even after…" _we aren't together anymore_, she didn't say.

"Wait," he said, scooting up to be level with her in the bed again. "We?"

"Yeah, me and Sasha." She looked confused, like he should have known that. Maybe he should have. "We're looking for a house to buy."

Austin wasn't sure how he got to this place, but he wasn't jealous. Somewhere along the line he had figured out that Sasha and Payson were untouchable, and he was okay with that, because he knew that he would always have a part of her. "Payson, you know that I've accepted you living with Sasha, but buying a house together is a big deal. You need to tell me about things like that before you do them."

She furrowed her eyebrows. "I didn't tell you?"

He shook his head. She reached up to cradle his cheek and said, "I'm so sorry. I honestly thought I told you. There's so much going on right now that I can't keep track. But you're right. No more big decisions without discussing them with you, I promise."

Even though he knew it wasn't her intention, her words made him feel like an ass. "I'm not trying to control you, Pay, I swear. I just want to be in the loop."

"I know. I told you the other day that you had responsibilities to me and the baby now, but that goes both ways. I have responsibilities to you and Alex, too, and part of that responsibility is to be open with you."

He pulled her in for a kiss and then whispered a thank you in her ear.

He could tell when a thought flickered through her head. He was beginning to read her almost as well as Sasha did. "I just remembered something that I was supposed to ask you," she said. "Talking about Sasha reminded me. Are you going to train at the Rock again when we get back?"

"Do you want me there?" He hadn't given a thought to where he would be training after the Olympics were over.

"I do, as long as you'd be happy there. I'll be there coaching, and I'd like to have you that close every day."

He was glad she felt that way, because there was a time when she wouldn't have. "Then I'll come back. I don't want to waste a single minute that I could spend with you and Alex."

"I don't want to waste a single minute, either," she said, drawing his mouth to hers and pressing her body against him.

They lost themselves making love, and afterward Payson fell asleep, or so he thought until her eyes opened and she whispered his name.

She waited until he was looking in her eyes to say, "I think… that I should tell you about that night in St. Louis. You deserve to know what happened."

Just the mention of that night gave him chills. They hadn't brought it up, at least not explicitly, since she got sick. "Payson, you don't have to tell me. You shouldn't have to re-live that."

"You deserve to know," she repeated. "I know I always _said_ that we both made mistakes, but deep down I blamed you, and I think you blame yourself, too. But that's not how it happened."

He couldn't stop himself from asking, "What do you mean?"

She sat up and reached for a shirt, which happened to be his, and pulled it over her head. She responded to his raised eyebrows by saying, "I feel like we should not be naked for this conversation."

Payson never had qualms about being naked, so he knew whatever she needed to say was very important to her. He rummaged around until he found his boxers to put on, and then they sat facing each other on the bed.

"I was not in good place at Nationals," she started. "I think everybody knew I was having a hard time with it, but nobody knew how bad it really was, not even Sasha. I _knew_ I was in St. Louis, but in my head I couldn't get out of Boston. Every time I looked at an apparatus I saw myself falling, and sometimes I was so scared that I couldn't even move. My muscles would just lock up and I'd have to make up an excuse for why I wasn't practicing.

"I started having panic attacks. I stole a bottle of Xanax from my parents' medicine cabinet before we left home, and I was popping them every four hours on the dot—extra at night, just to be able to sleep—but it wasn't enough. After the first night of competition I hyperventilated so badly that I blacked out for a couple of minutes."

"Christ, Payson, I had no idea." She was so strong during that competition, seeming to push aside all of her emotions, but he should have known better. She almost _died_ at Nationals the previous year. That was not something you just got over. "You shouldn't have had to go through that alone."

She wiped a tear from the corner of her eye. "I should have told someone, I know, but I just didn't know how. I couldn't even explain it to myself, much less to someone else."

She took a deep breath to regain her composure, and then continued her story. "When you asked me to go out and celebrate with you when it was over, I just wanted to get out, get the hell away from the gym and forget everything, so I said yes. You were drinking, a lot, and you kept filling up my glass and telling me to drink more, and any other night I would have said no. But I just _couldn't_ that night.

"Eventually you talked me into doing shots, and it started out innocent enough, just licking salt off your arm, and it just, I don't know, spun out of control. And we were talking in between the shots, and I ended up telling you everything, about the panic attacks and the pills and blacking out, and you said, 'You know what your problem is, Keeler? You need to fuck someone. Hell, _I_ need to fuck someone. It's been a year and I'm tired of waiting on one woman. First Kaylie and now… Maybe we should get out of here and solve each other's problems.'

"The next shot you did, the salt was on my breast, just right above the edge of my bra, and I guess you were really serious about needing to have sex, because you went a little farther than just licking off the salt. So when you tried to take the lime out of my mouth, I dropped it and kissed you instead.

"After that, we ended up back in your hotel room, and I you already know how that turned out." She started crying and wiped her cheeks with the back of her hand. "I'm so sorry, Austin," she sobbed. "I was hurt and scared and I took it all out on you, but I shouldn't have. I'm sorry that I let you feel guilty all this time. It wasn't your fault."

It took him a long time to process her words, but when he worked it all out one thing was clear: "It was, Payson. I took advantage of you. You were too messed up to make good decisions and I used that."

"You didn't know," she said, cupping her hand against his cheek. "Just like I didn't know that I was the woman you were talking about. How could I expect you to stop after I kissed you like that, when you'd waited so long for me?"

She moved forward curled into his chest. "I wish I had known how you felt so we could have done this the right way."

"You would have wanted this? I didn't think that you were ever interested."

"I wasn't, because it never occurred to me to be interested. I was so focused on gymnastics that I didn't think about the possibility of anything more between us. You were just my friend. But if I'd ever stopped to consider it, yeah, I think I would have wanted this." She paused, like she was done speaking, but then she asked, "Why didn't you ever tell me?"

Why didn't he tell her? In retrospect, he should have. "I know this sounds stupid, but I guess I thought you knew and were trying to let me down gently. I flirted with you like crazy, kept trying to win you over, but I could never get your attention away from Sasha. I thought that you wanted to be with him instead of me. Now I wish I'd taken the risk and asked you out."

"You know what, though? As much as I would have liked to have done things the normal way between us, I don't think I'd change it if I could. If anything was different, we wouldn't have Alex."

He was floored by the sentiment. "Do you really mean that?"

"I do. I thought I'd never be able to move past that night, Austin, but I was wrong. It was a horrible experience, and I'll never be able to look back and be thankful for it, but I can be thankful for the things that came from it. You gave me the biggest blessing of my life that night." She took his hand and spread it flat across her belly. "We did this, Austin. We made a baby. No matter how bad the circumstances around it are, that will never stop being amazing."

"You'll never stop being amazing, either," he said. He moved down to kiss her still-flat stomach again, and knew that Payson was right. It didn't matter how Alex was conceived or that they were too young and not ready to be parents. Despite everything, this was the best thing that had ever happened to him.

* * *

><p>AN: We're having horrible storms roun' 'bout here tonight, and I'm posting thins in a break between two of them. So be appreciative ;P

So I forgot to mention this before, but this is one of the few places in this story where I just blatantly wrote something that was inaccurate. The top ranking AA finalists start on vault and end on floor, but I wanted her on floor first so I ignored the normal starting order.

What do you think about what happened in St. Louis? Hopefully this gives you a little insight into why they slept together in the first place, because they were both feeling pretty needy that night. Also, is it weird that I just assumed that the Keelers would have a bottle of Xanax lying around? I'm not sure if that's a product of me living in the south or not. (If you don't get the connection between the south and Xanax, google Pistol Annies "Takin' Pills")


	54. Chapter 54

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

A/N: We're taking a short little break from Sasha/Payson/Austin for the next couple of chapters to deal with Kelly and Lauren's lives. Don't worry, we will return to our regularly scheduled program soon :)

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><p>This was not the plan. This wasn't anywhere close to the plan. The plan was to go back to the Village with Nick early so that she could tell him the truth. Sitting up in his bed clutching a sheet to her bare chest while she freaked out <em>definitely<em> wasn't the plan.

When she came to his room the night before, she had no intention whatsoever of sleeping with him. She wasn't even all that sure how it happened. She blamed it on her silver medal. She was too nervous to tell him at first, so she let herself get caught up in small talk about winning the silver. He said congratulations and leaned in to hug her, and the hug turned into a kiss, which turned into a whole lot more. It was all the medal's fault.

She started searching around for her clothes, putting them on as she found them, and her movement woke Nick.

"Parks? What are you doing?" He must have noticed her panic, because he asked, "What's wrong?"

"Nothing!" she squeaked, then corrected herself, "Everything. I shouldn't have let this happen, Nick."

"Kelly, calm down. You're freaking me out."

"You don't call me Kelly. You never call me Kelly. I call you Nick and you call me Parks, that's the way it's always been." She was rambling, but the use of her first name threw her. They'd known each other their whole lives and he'd never once called her Kelly. She picked up his clothes and tossed them in his lap. "Get dressed. We need to talk."

Everything was ruined now. She had a plan; she knew exactly what she was going to say and how she was going to say it, but then she went and screwed everything up by sleeping with him. She didn't have a plan anymore, and she _freaked out_ when she didn't have a plan. This was wrong. She _always_ had a plan. Nick _always_ called her Parks.

"Oh, God, I can't do this. I'm sorry, Nick, I just can't do this." She bolted out the door, trying to get away as fast as she could so that she could calm down and figure out what to do. She needed a new plan.

She was halfway across the apartment when he caught up to her and jerked her back around. "Kelly, stop! Tell me what's wrong."

She shoved against his bare chest (why wasn't he wearing a shirt?) and yelled, "Don't call me that! I'm not Kelly, I'm Parks. I've been Parks since we were three fucking years old. You can't just change what you call me after fifteen years!"

"Fine, you're Parks!" he yelled back. "Nothing's changed. You're still Parks and you're still just as fucking insane as you've always been! But I've put up with it for fifteen years already, so why the hell do you think I'm going to let you run away this time?"

"You were the one that ran away, Nick, not me! _You_ left!"

"What the hell else was I supposed to do, Parks?"—thank _God_ he called her Parks—"You iced me out. You wouldn't even speak to me!"

She finally let herself admit what she'd been hoping for when he left. "You were supposed to fight for me! You said you loved me." She was horrified to hear the sob that came out with the words and feel the tears slipping down her cheeks. She was supposed to be strong. _That was part of the plan_. "You said you loved me, Nick. I wanted you to _fight_ for me."

"Then why did you end things?" he asked. He stopped yelling, like he just ran out of steam. "We've broken up more times than I can count, but that was different. You didn't call me a jerk or hit me or act like a psychotic bitch like you normally did. You just said it was over and walked away. Why?"

A whimper escaped her lips. She thought breaking up with him would be the hardest thing she'd ever have to do, but telling him the truth now, after all this time, was so much harder. "Because I was pregnant."

"What?"

She spoke with less than a whisper, but she knew he heard her. He just couldn't process it, like she couldn't process it when she found out, but _finally_ having someone to share that emotion with gave her strength. "I was pregnant. I wanted to tell you, Nick. I wanted to tell you but my mom wouldn't let me."

"You had an abortion." It wasn't a question or an accusation. His eyes were unfocused and his mouth was hanging open a bit; she thought that he might be saying things out loud just to make himself understand.

She nodded her head and another whimper slipped out. "I hate myself for what I did, Nick. There hasn't been a single day since that I didn't wake up and wish that I could undo it, but I can't."

His eyes cleared and met hers. "Parks…"

It was all she needed to hear. She slid into his arms and they cried together, just like they did when her dad died, just like they did when his mom left. But their baby didn't _leave_, it was taken away, and this time when they blamed themselves they knew it was true.

When she started to calm down, she sniffled and said, "I'm not a psychotic bitch."

"Yes you are. That's what I like best about you."

She laughed. She sobbed. She was crying again and clinging to him like her life depended on it. She'd missed this so much. Nobody understood how truly fucked up she was better than Nick, because he was fucked up in complementary ways. She just wished they hadn't ruined it all.

o-O-o

"How did I never know this?" Kaylie asked.

Kelly shrugged. "I don't know, we just didn't talk about it. We're both very private people."

She spent the last half hour telling her teammates the story behind her very public break down in the men's apartment. She and Nick were yelling loud enough to wake up the other people in the apartment, so they had an audience which they unfortunately didn't notice until long after it was over. It was bad enough that his teammates were there, but the nameless girl that Max slept with last night heard, too. It would probably be the talk of the Village by now if Max hadn't blackmailed the girl with the naked pictures he took of her the night before. (What kind of idiot lets a stranger take naked pictures of her?)

She was exhausted, tired of talking, and desperately wanted to go to bed, but she owed her friends some kind of explanation, so she was sitting on the couch with them rather than sleeping.

"I'm sorry I brought him up in that interview the other day," Emily said. "That must have been so awkward for you."

She shrugged again. She hated talking about stuff like this, so she was communicating by shrugs as much as possible. "It was fine. We've been on again, off again our whole lives, but we'd been off for nearly a year when that stuff happened. I made fun of him for it when we got back together."

"So what happened when he went back to Denver? How did you end up… where you ended up?" Lauren asked. Kelly thought that their resident loudmouth probably cut herself off right before she said something like 'knocked up.' Lauren didn't do socially appropriate very well, but she was trying.

"Nothing all that different than before. We were just older." She felt the need to justify her actions, even though none of her friends were judging her. "I swear I'm not an idiot, guys. We used protection. It just didn't work."

"Glad to know you think I'm an idiot, KP."

They all swung to look at Payson. She was sitting with her legs and arms crossed, wearing a wry expression. Kelly backtracked quickly.

"No, that's not what I meant! I mean, you didn't know what you were doing, you were drunk…" Kelly trailed off when she realized what she was saying, and then she remembered that she was Kelly fucking Parker and she didn't apologize for anything. "Wait. You know what? You are an idiot. You got trashed, had sex with a guy you _weren't_ dating, didn't use a condom, and didn't take emergency contraceptives the next day. You're _beyond_ an idiot."

Payson smiled. "Welcome back, Kelly."

Her jaw dropped. Payson manipulated her! "I can't believe you just did that."

"Kelly," Payson said, leaning forward and stretching out her hand, "You're not okay. Stop trying to pretend like you are. You don't have to sit around and talk about this like it isn't hard for you. Cry, scream, sleep all day, make Marty take you to the gym to work out; do whatever it is that you need to do to deal with this."

She wasn't sure how to deal with it. Usually she just shoved her problems in a box in her head and got on with her life. "What did you do? When you found out you were pregnant, how did you deal?"

"I screwed Austin. But I'm not letting you borrow him, so don't ask."

It was said with so much seriousness that Kelly couldn't help but laugh. And then she cried. She leaned her head against Emily's shoulder and closed her eyes, letting the exhaustion sink in. Payson was right. She needed to stop pretending like this was a normal day. "Can I just go to bed? I just want to sleep."

"Come on," Emily said, helping her stand up from the couch. She suddenly felt like her limbs had turned to lead. "You can sleep for as long as you want."

She let Emily lead her into the room they shared and tuck her into bed like a child. Nobody had taken care of her in years. Maybe she needed that as much as she needed sleep.

* * *

><p>AN: Poor Kelly :(

So I was supposed to post last night, but yet again I came home from work, went to sleep, and stayed that way for 14 or 15 hours. So I think we can safely assume that if I'm supposed to post on Fridays it won't happen. I'll try to post on Monday this week to make up for it, and to get me off the vicious cycle that puts me always supposed to post on Friday.

I forgot to mention this last time, but there is a picture of Payson's dress from the All Around reception on my pinterest, on the Amor Fati board. The web address is on my profile page, or you can just google pinterest and flowerchild3286 to find it. And as always their leos can be found on the board called Amor Fati Leos.


	55. Chapter 55

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

A/N: Woops, I almost forgot that I promised to do this tonight!

* * *

><p>Austin wasn't sure when he'd become Nicky Russo's shoulder to cry on—metaphorically, of course, because they were guys and didn't cry—but it had happened. He'd been sitting in his room with Nicky for nearly an hour, giving him support just like Payson and her teammates were probably doing for Kelly. Well, not <em>just<em> like them, because he was pretty sure the girls were talking instead of drinking, but the basic concept was the same.

When Steven texted him about what was happening in their apartment, he and Payson came to diffuse the situation. Pay wrapped her arms around Kelly and led her back to their place, while Austin grabbed a six pack of beer from the fridge and motioned Nicky into their bedroom. Russo didn't say much. They sat together and drank, and once Nicky asked, "Parks and I can't ever go back, can we? It's never going to be the same."

Austin didn't bother to answer, because his opinion didn't matter. Nicky was the only one who knew what he and Kelly could shoulder together, and if he thought they couldn't work things out, chances were he was right.

Because they'd been so quiet, Austin was surprised when his friend (when did they become friends?) spoke again. "The other day, after our finals, Kelly said that she gave up a lot for the sport and she didn't think it was worth it anymore. I get that now. But then she said, about you and Payson, 'that could have been us.' What did she mean?"

He didn't need to answer that question, either. Nicky knew; he was just asking for confirmation.

"Are you happy about it?"

"Yes."

"What's it like, knowing that you're going to be a father?" Nicky asked. "I just want to know what I'm missing out on. What I would have had if I'd done a better job of protecting Parks from her mom."

There was so much that Austin wanted to say. He wanted to tell Nicky that there was nothing he could have done to stop Kelly's mom. He wanted to tell him that their situations were completely different, because Austin was five years older than Nicky and in a different place in his life. He wanted to tell him that punishing himself wasn't going to solve anything. Instead, he grabbed his laptop off his bed, dug a CD out of his bag, and sat down next to his friend. It was Payson's last ultrasound, from when they were in the hospital on Saturday. If Nicky wanted to know what it felt like, this was the best way to show him.

He pressed play, and then pointed to the screen. "That's his head, and those little stumps are his arms and legs. This is his heart beating. He was moving around a lot that day, and in a minute here he'll kick in just the right way so that we can see his toes."

They listened to the heartbeat, and when Alex kicked he rewound the video and played it again so that Nicky could get the full impact of the five little toes. Austin had the decency to pretend like he didn't see when Nicky wiped away tears.

There was a tentative knock at the door, and even though he was pretty sure it was Payson, he closed the laptop before he said, "Come in."

It was Payson, and she leaned against the doorframe rather than coming all the way inside. "Sorry to interrupt," she said, "but we need to leave, babe. I have an appointment with Alex."

He liked the way she said that. Anybody listening would think she was talking about one of her doctors. She did, in fact, have an appointment with two doctors—Dr. Clarke, the hematologist, and Dr. Flockton, the obstetrician—but one of them involved a new ultrasound of their son.

He sat his laptop down on Nicky's bed, an implicit invitation to watch the video again in private if he wanted to. He stood up to get his key and credentials before he left, and he heard Payson say, "I'm so sorry, Nicky. If you ever need anything…"

Austin couldn't think of anything worse than sitting down with your ex-girlfriend to discuss an aborted pregnancy with your other ex-girlfriend, but he figured there was something in Payson's nature that obligated her to offer. She couldn't see someone in pain and not try to help.

"Come on," he said, leading her out with a hand at the small of her back. "We should go." _We should get to your appointments. We should leave Nicky alone for a while._ Payson understood both meanings.

In the car, he told her that Nicky knew about the pregnancy. She took the development well, but said, "We went from four other people knowing to thirteen other people knowing in just a few weeks. We suck at keeping secrets."

The appointments went better than they had dared to hope. Her hematocrit levels were still well in the safe zone. They scheduled a transfusion for the next day as a precaution, but she would only be getting one bag, which was a huge improvement over the three bags she got on Wednesday morning. She would be getting another Aranesp shot at the same time as the transfusion, and there was every reason to believe that it was working. It was the most encouraging meeting she'd had with Dr. Clarke so far.

The appointment with Dr. Flockton went just as well. Alex was growing right on track and there were no problems with the pregnancy. That was even more relieving to Payson than the news that her blood levels were good. She was practically glowing as she watched Alex wiggle around on the ultrasound screen. Austin thought that if he looked in a mirror, he might be glowing, too.

When they left the hospital, they met Ava and Payson's family for lunch. Strictly speaking, they weren't supposed to be socializing outside of the Village, but as long as they were already out they were going to take full advantage of their only day off.

"Do you think your dad will ever stop hating me?" he whispered in Payson's ear. Mark hadn't stopped glaring at him since they sat down.

"Give him time," she whispered back. "He'll come around when he sees how much you care about us. Right now he only knows you as the man who hurt me. He needs to get to know you and the man who makes me happy."

"I make you happy?" he asked, in full flirt mode.

She ghosted her lips close to his and hummed her agreement. "Mmm. Very happy."

She was so close that he couldn't resist. He swooped down to steal a kiss from her, but his lips had barely touched hers when Becca interrupted them. "Are you guys going to turn into one of those couples who are so lovey-dovey that it's nauseating?"

"I don't think lovey-dovey fits them," Ava said. "'All over each other' works better."

"Think about everything that's happened to us lately," Payson said. She didn't enumerate them, but they were heavy in the air. She was sick. She was pregnant. They were at the Olympics. They _won_ at the Olympics. "We get a free pass to behave however we want right now. Talk to me in a few weeks when there is a little bit less going on, maybe then I'll listen."

Mark scowled, Kim hid a smile behind her napkin, Becca stuck out her tongue, and Ava said, "Just wait. Next time I have a boyfriend I'm going to make out with him in front of you as payback."

Oh, God. That was not something he wanted to think about. He hurried to change the subject to something less disturbing.

In the end, he was surprised at how little tension there was at the lunch, which he owed in large part to his sister. Ava had a near miraculous talent to make people love her. It was rivaled only by her ability to alienate people, and she chose which talent to use depending on the situation. If she found somebody interesting or if it served a purpose to befriend them, she turned on the charm. If she disliked someone, she didn't hold back in letting them know it. Anyone who fell in between might as well not exist.

When they were in their car again—Payson had probably made more use of the town cars than any other athlete so far—Payson leaned her head against his shoulder and said, "I feel guilty being this happy when Kelly is so devastated."

"Don't be. She wouldn't want that. Her mom made her miserable for seventeen years, so I'm pretty sure she doesn't want to start doing that to other people."

Payson tapped him on the tip of the nose and asked, "When did you get so smart?"

"I've always been this smart," he said. "People are just distracted by my insane hotness and don't notice."

She rolled her eyes but otherwise ignored his comment. She asked, "Is it weird that I'm this happy? Considering everything that's happened, my life should be falling apart right now, but instead I feel like everything is clicking into place."

"You chose that, Payson. You're pretty amazing like that. You don' just make the best of a bad situation, you make the bad situation good."

"What do you mean?" she asked.

He tried to explain. "Well, like when you found out you were pregnant. A lot of people in your situation would think this had ruined their life, but you made a choice to be happy about it. And when your dad kicked you out, you took that and turned it into something that worked well for you and for Sasha. And even the stuff with your blood, when Dr. Clarke told you the results today you didn't concentrate on the fact that you were still losing blood cells, you focused on the fact that you weren't losing them as fast as before. You're happy out of sheer willpower, Payson."

"I never thought about it like that before. I just don't see any point in focusing on the bad stuff, I guess. You miss out on so much that way. Like you," she said with a smile. "If I'd kept holding onto how things started with us I would never get to experience this. And you're definitely worth experiencing."

"So are you, Payson. I'll never have any regrets about this." He knew their relationship was going to end, and he knew that it would be one of the hardest things either of them would ever do, but he would never trade away this time together. Because Payson Keeler was worth experiencing.

* * *

><p>AN: How _did_ Austin become Nicky's shoulder to cry on? I still don't know. The story takes me to a lot of places that I don't expect, and that happened twice with Nicky. They're both in the back ground and one of them you probably won't even see, but it did have a huge impact on other parts of the story.


	56. Chapter 56

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

A/N: J-Lo! No, not Jennifer Lopez, Jake and Lauren. Lauren's outfit in on my pinterest, username flowerchild3286

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><p>It was her first Olympic party, at least as long as you didn't count the reception party for Payson the night before, which Lauren didn't. For one, it was formal, which was fun in its own way, but it wasn't the raunchy dancing, beer drinking, hooking up with random strangers kind of party that the Olympics were famous for. And two, it wasn't in the Village. She couldn't go to the Olympics and <em>not<em> go to a party in the Village. It was sacrilege.

Andy and Beth had been out a couple of times, since they were no longer needed after qualifying, but the rest of them hadn't been allowed to party until after the Team Finals, and that night was about _them_, so they celebrated as a group in their apartment. Lauren, Emily, and Kaylie could have gone out the next night, but it didn't feel right to go without Payson and Kelly, who were still under lockdown, so tonight was their first night out.

Payson and Austin were swaying together in the middle of the dancing crowd, Emily was off to the side being entertained by Steven and Jake, Kaylie was helping Kelly drink herself into a happier state of mind, and Sasha was leaning against a table fending off women. Lauren wondered what excuse he would give if someone asked him why he didn't accept one of the many offers—after all, most of the women were hot. The truth was that he'd stopped looking at other women since Payson kissed him, but she doubted that he even realized.

She noticed it when he came back from Romania, how he didn't discreetly check out the hot gym moms anymore and he didn't flirt with women at competition receptions. She was pretty sure that he hooked up with one of the event coordinators at the 2011 Nationals, but his hotel room had stayed company-free ever since Payson's lips touched his. At first she wasn't sure how to use the information against him, but then things changed and she didn't _want_ to use it against him. If he and Payson didn't understand their feelings for each other yet, she wasn't going to push them. It would happen on its own eventually. Besides, Payson was really happy with Austin right now, and Lauren didn't want to screw that up. That would end on its own eventually, too.

She was winding her way through the crowd, distracted by her thoughts about Payson, when somebody slammed into her and knocked her drink out of her hand. She ignored the indignant cry of the person her beer splashed onto and turned to the culprit.

"Hey, watch where you're going! These shoes are Gucci and you almost made me spill my dr—" She stopped mid-word when she caught sight of the guy who bumped into her, totally unprepared for the hotness before her. He smirked and she was caught off guard by the rush of warmth between her legs. Random hook ups were an Olympic tradition, and she found herself seriously considering one.

"Easy there, Barbie," he said. God, his voice was just as hot as his body. "You ran into me. I was standing still."

"Well—" she stalled out, searching for an excuse. Her libido was hampering her ability to respond. "You should have moved out of my way, then. And don't call me Barbie."

"If you don't want to be called Barbie you shouldn't dress like one." He raked his eyes down her body, stopping to linger at her low cut black top and then continuing down to her red leather mini skirt and all the way down her legs. "You look the part, too. You've got the blonde hair—" he reached out to twirl a strand around his finger "—and great legs, but otherwise… well, you fall a little flat."

Her jaw fell open. Did he seriously just insult her boobs? "Well you're not exactly Ken yourself. I don't think Barbie was in to short and bald."

"Oh, I'm not short."

What was with this guy and innuendos about body parts? She ignored the part of her that wanted to see if he was telling the truth and asked, "Who _are_ you, anyway?"

"Jake Williams," he said, leaning into her personal space, exuding sex and confidence. She found herself leaning toward him, too. "The future wrestling Olympic Champion."

She let condescension drip from her reply. "Good luck with that. Gold medals are hard to get. I should know, since I already won one."

He slid his eyes over her body again and she felt another rush of warmth down south. She was so turned on that they could go at it right now and she'd be ready. "So who are you, Barbie? And what exactly are you an Olympic Champion of?"

"Why don't you figure that out for yourself? It shouldn't be too hard. I'm pretty well known." She walked away from him. Her body was screaming at her to go back and screw the hell out of him, but if she played her cards right she could get more than a one night stand. She just needed to make him work for it. If she'd learned anything from the twin disasters of Carter and Max, it was that men stuck around longer if they had to chase you.

She abandoned her quest for a new dance partner and headed back toward Payson and Austin. She could content herself with just talking to her friends until Jake came to find her. She was pretty sure it would be worth it.

Emily, Jake, and Steven had joined them, so she got her dance partner after all. Technically she was dancing with Jake (gym-Jake. There were too many Jake's now), but she could just as easily have said the six of them were dancing together. The girls floated between the three men and sometimes even danced with each other, chatting the whole time.

"Where's Nicky?" she asked to the group in general. She hoped he wasn't off by himself somewhere, dwelling on what happened that morning. She'd learned the hard way that it wasn't a healthy way to deal with things.

Austin was the one that answered. "He's off with my sister, actually. She's like a nerd whisperer, she knows exactly how to get to him. If anybody can get his mind off of the stuff with Kelly, it's Ava."

She could see that. Ava Tucker was kind of a genius when it came to people. "Did she really take you guys to a strip club the other night?"

"Not quite," he said with a laugh. "It was a cabaret club. There were still women taking their clothes off, but it wasn't technically a strip club. They might be at one now, though. Who knows."

The conversation was interrupted by a rich, deep voice that carried over her shoulder, "Lauren Tanner. Gymnastics gold medalist."

"Well that didn't take long," she said, spinning around to face the man that she'd already come to think of as 'her Jake.' She felt the same inexorable surge of lust as before.

"When you said that you were well known, I thought to myself, that girl has an ego the size of the sun. Which is true, but you were also right. You're the girl who got the standing ovation."

She knew that he would be able to figure out who she was, but she didn't think he'd do it that fast, and she didn't think he would know about the standing O. There were a limited number of gold medalists so far, so she figured that he would just look on NBC's medal tally and get her name. Apparently he went a little farther.

"Good job," she said. She put on a fake air of indifference, not giving him an inch. "You figured out the obvious. That might have been more impressive if you didn't just insult me, too."

"Oh, come on, Barbie, you know it's true. It's a good thing. Confidence is sexy." Wow, this guy had swagger. He managed to call her sexy and still make it about him. The air he was giving off said, _because you're so hot, you _might_ just have a shot with someone as awesome as me. If you're lucky._

She pushed aside her attraction and said, "Well that's great to know. I'm arrogant, but it's okay because I'm sexy. Thanks for letting me know." She turned her back to him, dismissing him.

"Now wait a second," he said, just like she planned. "I think I earned at least a dance here, since you made me work to find out your name."

"Sorry, I already have a dance partner." She pulled Jake Dalton closer to her. "Jake, meet Jake. He's a gold medalist, too."

Dalton looked a bit surprised, but accepted her Jake's handshake and didn't question Lauren's obvious attempt to make the wrestler jealous.

"Congrats on your medal, man. But you don't mind if I steal your date for a dance, do you?"

"Sure," gym-Jake said (this was getting confusing). He grabbed Payson's hand and tugged her toward them. "I'll just steal Tucker's."

"Hey, I recognize you," Jake said. Lauren was a little put out that he knew who Payson was, but she accepted it gracefully. Payson was more famous than the rest of them combined and then times ten. "You're the one they took out on a stretcher last week, right?"

Payson rolled her eyes. "Really? I'm the All Around Olympic champ, the face of Chanel and Louboutin, and I haven't gone a week without being in some kind of magazine for nearly a year, but now I'm known as the girl that got taken out of the Village on a stretcher? This is so not fair."

He'd struck a nerve. Payson never brought up her celebrity, but she'd been known as the girl who got injured way too often in her life and she hated it. "Don't worry, Pay. He's just an unobservant idiot. He didn't know who I was, either."

He seemed to realize that he'd stuck his foot in his mouth, because he backtracked. "No offense meant, I promise. I don't know who any of you Barbies are, and I'm not in to Chanel and Louboutin."—he mispronounced Louboutin—"I've got no frame of reference other than you being rolled past my room."

"Barbie?" Payson asked, an incredulous note in her voice. This guy was doing a good job of pissing of a woman who was notoriously hard to piss off.

Lauren gave a contemptuous toss of her head and said, "Okay, let's dance before you make an even bigger ass of yourself."

She used some of her best moves with him, but she held back. Nothing too sexual, being careful of how often her body brushed against his, not showing too much interest. He knew she was playing games, but _she_ knew that it was working. He wanted her as much as she wanted him.

"So that guy you were dancing with," he started, pretending not to remember Jake's name. As if he could forget that. "You said he was a gold medalist?"

"Yeah, all my friends are," she said. It wouldn't hurt to make sure he knew she was an important person. "We've all got at least one, and then Payson's has two, Marty has three, and Austin and Sasha each have four. American gymnastics is a pretty big deal."

She didn't bother to mention that Sasha and Marty were coaches, not contemporaries. They were impressive names to drop.

"Sounds like," he whispered. He was standing close behind her, his hands on her hips, and his breath hot on her neck as he leaned closer to murmur in her ear. "Not bad for a bunch of people in spandex doing backbends."

She punished him for the comment by putting a foot of space between them. "Are you really dissing _my_ sport? You roll around on the floor with other men wearing short shorts. Homoerotic much?"

"Humans have a primal need to exert dominance over each other," he said, pulling her against him again. She shuddered at the term 'primal need.' That was exactly what she felt for him. "Wrestling is an expression of that instinct. Now, I'm not an anthropologist, but I don't think that balancing on a stick of wood is part of basic human nature."

She slipped away from him again and said, "Exactly. You're not doing anything that a caveman couldn't do. We, on the other hand, challenge the laws of nature and win."

The song ended and she walked away, which was becoming her signature move when it came to this guy, but before she was out of hearing range she turned back to him and said, "See you around, Jake Williams."

He winked and said, "Back at you, Lauren Tanner."

This was _so_ not over.

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><p>I get a lot of questions about Cat and Mouse being gone, and I always intend to post something about it but never remember. So I'm knuckling down and doing it now. Cat and Mouse and Of Love and Trucks got taken down for violating the site's policy on explicit material, so I moved them over to livejournal. Love and Trucks is posted already, and parts of C&amp;M are up. I'm going to post the link on profile here, but since it takes a while for that to show up sometimes I'm also telling you that it's livejournal with the same username, flowerchild3286. I'm headed over to post another chapter or two now, because I promised farfallama I would do it days ago and haven't yet.<p> 


	57. Chapter 57

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

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><p>Payson was leaning against Sasha's shoulder in the backseat of their car. Not because she was tired, but because it had been too long since they'd had a chance to be together like this.<p>

He didn't resent the time she spent with Austin, because the younger man was really good for her, but he still missed being alone with her. They'd slept together the night after Austin's All Around final, but they didn't get to talk much because she was, oddly enough, sleeping. The past two days had been a whirlwind of group activities—Payson's reception, a group breakfast the next morning, video games in the men's apartment during which they discovered that the apartments in the Olympic Village were not built to house twelve men and seven women in one room, a raucous dinner not suited to the five star restaurant they were having it in, and then a party back at the Village. The ride to the hospital was the first time they'd been alone in two days.

They were catching up on all the things that had happened when they weren't in each other's presence over those two days. The ride to the hospital was short, so they didn't get to cover very much, but once she was checked in they had more time and more privacy. Because of the attention surrounding her, she was getting her transfusions in a private room rather than the common room used for outpatient transfusions and dialysis. Other than the nurses who would check on her ever so often, there was no one to overhear their conversation.

She kept things casual while a pair of nurses set up the transfusion, recapping the lunch that she and Austin had with their families, but as soon as they were alone she turned to more serious topics. She told him everything about her appointments the day before, giving him details that she had skimmed over when she first got back. She'd bought an app that allowed her to download the video of her ultrasound to her iPhone, so she played that for him and they marveled over the miraculous development of Alex's elbows. Sasha had never given much thought to elbows, other than to know that they hurt when knocked into sharp edges, but seeing the first evidence of a crook in a tiny person's arm threw the inconspicuous joint into a new light.

They paused every time a nurse came in to fiddle with the machines controlling the transfusion, but Payson managed to tell him some of the highlights of her conversation with Austin after the finals. Obviously there were large chunks of that discussion which she left out, but she told him about her realization that she'd been leaving Austin out of important decisions and her conviction to include him from then on, and Austin's decision to come back to the Rock after the Olympics were over. When she struggled her way through a recounting of what happened during Nationals, Sasha felt his chest tighten.

"Payson, I'm so sorry. I should have noticed how bad things were for you that week."

She reached for him and cupped her hand against the side of his face. "Don't punish yourself for not knowing," she said. "Nobody knew. I kept it from all of you."

"But I knew you were having a hard time. I should have tried harder to help you, to get you to open up about it." It was just like Boston; he'd missed the signs. She had a world class poker face, so he should have know that if Payson was showing her struggles at all, it must have been so much worse than it seemed.

"Stop," she commanded. "We're not doing this. I'm done with looking back; we can't change anything. We're looking forward now."

He turned his head enough to press a kiss to her palm. "You're right. So let's talk about the future instead." He felt guilty, but he would try his hardest to move past it, just to make her happy.

She laughed as if he'd said something funny. "But there are so many options there! How will I choose what to talk about?"

"Ok, I'll narrow it down," he said, laughing, too, now that he understood the joke. "Let's talk about the near future. Your birthday is tomorrow. How do you want to celebrate?"

"I didn't think we would be," she said, eyes wide. "I mean, I expect the girls to stick a candle in a pancake or something at breakfast, but Emily and I compete on Monday, and so do Austin and Nicky. Aren't parties against the rules when we compete the next day?"

"Technically, yes, but you are turning eighteen. That only happens once, so we should recognize that somehow. The competition is over at 4:30, and if you add in time for the press and then going back to the Village to change, we should be able to do something by six, so you won't have to stay out late."

"Okay, then how about dinner somewhere, where we can have a private room with no paparazzi hanging around."

He started rifling through long forgotten knowledge to find a restaurant that would fit their needs. It should be doable. "So who do you want? The girls, your family, anyone else?"

"Nobody who doesn't know about the baby, because I don't want to spend the night hiding that. So you and Marty, obviously, and maybe Kevin, but that might be awkward to leave Peter behind. The girls, although I hate to leave Beth and Andy out of this, and my family. Nicky knows, but it's weird to invite him and not the other guys. So…" she stopped to add in her head, "twelve, maybe thirteen for the reservation."

He did the math in his head, too, and came up short. "I'm missing somebody here. Me, Marty, you five girls, Austin, your parents and Becca. But that's only eleven, so who am I forgetting?"

"Ava. I'm including her as my family, but I guess your head hasn't caught up to mine there yet." She was right. They were normally on the same page, but he hadn't quite gotten used to the idea of Austin's family now being Payson's family. Payson and Ava had a blood connection now through Alex.

"Alright," he said, "We have a plan. I'll find someplace that works and set up a room for us."

o-O-o

Austin was a five time gold medalist now. He dominated on floor, but Jake landed just off the podium, taking forth place behind Kai Zou of China by a one tenth gap. Austin's win would have been a lot better if Jake had won with him, but even though he regretted his friend's disappointing finish, he was still the Olympic Champion on floor, and that felt good.

Standing at the top of that podium never got less cool. He'd been up there four times before, not to mention once on the silver platform and once on the bronze, but all the same emotions were there. When you were standing beneath that American flag and listening to the national anthem, winning a gold in an event final felt just as good as winning in the All Around.

The press for event finals worked differently than it did for the All Around and Team competitions, because the women were competing on vault right after the medal ceremony. So rather than the press being allowed onto the floor, there was a press conference set up after the final ceremony of the day. He had to deal with the cameras following them around, but there were no reporters accompanying them, so the eight men walked out of the arena with minimal interruption.

The women were already lined up in the tunnel when the men exited the competition area, and Payson was at the front of that line. He stepped out of his queue and over to her for a quick kiss and hug.

She wrapped her arms around his neck and whispered, "I knew you would win. I'm so proud of you."

Cameras were hanging around trying to get close ups of them kissing, which were no doubt being shown on the JumboTron right outside, and the event coordinator was glaring at them, so he gave her a quick peck on the lips and said, "Good luck. Go show them how awesome you are."

He gave Kelly a quick hug and "good luck," and then sprinted back to the locker room where he was supposed to be. Behind him he heard Kevin say, "Good luck Kelly. Good luck little one. Just do it like in practice and you'll be golden."

That was what Kevin always told them. Try to forget that you're competing and just do your routines like it was any other practice day. That was why it was so shocking when Austin came out with his upgraded parallel bars routine during the team finals, because he _wasn't_ doing it like in practice, and Kevin never allowed that. Austin was proud that his coach trusted him enough to go against his normal strategy.

He only had about 45 minutes before he had to be back out on pommel, so he couldn't stay and watch the women, but he was quick to turn on the TV when he reached the locker room. No one complained; most of the athletes in the room had friends and teammates competing on the women's side, so they wanted to watch as much as Austin did.

He heard the announcement blasting through the arena's loudspeakers, and then again on the television as a quieter, more distinct echo. "Ladies and Gentlemen, please welcome to the floor… the finalists for the women's gymnastics vault competition!"

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><p>AN: Okay, a little bit of a cliffhanger, but at least not a dramatic one. And to make up for it I have something else for you. Smut, of the Payson/Sasha variety. It's technically a tag to a later chapter in this story, but it makes complete sense as a standalone, so I'm posting it now. Head on over to my livejournal (flowerchild3286) if you're interested. For any of you who haven't read my M-rated stuff, I should warn you… it's M-rated for a reason.


	58. Chapter 58

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

A/N: Was I supposed to post today or yesterday? I'm a little unclear on that.

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><p>The announcer's over-enthusiastic voice boomed through the vast room, bouncing back off the walls so that Sasha's ears hurt. His girls didn't even notice. When you were competing, nothing else mattered.<p>

The screams and applause escalated for each girl introduced, as they moved closer to the gymnasts that were best known. Kelly had the honor of being announced as "Kelly Parker, All Around silver medalist," and when she stepped forward and waved to the crowd, there was an explosion of noise.

There was a small pause while the fanfare for Kelly died down, and then a loaded pause until… "And your All Around Olympic Champion, Payson Keeler!"

The word 'explosion' applied to Kelly's cheers, but it didn't come close to the kind of applause that Payson got. The floor shook beneath him and his ears rang, and he saw several people clap their hands to the sides of their heads to muffle the deafening noise. It was epic.

Payson didn't let it go to her head. If he had to bet, he would say that she didn't even realize that her applause was louder than everybody else's. She knew that she was the best, but in a very humble way. In Payson's head, she won because she worked the hardest, not because there was anything extraordinary about her. The rest of the world recognized that she was special. More than special.

As a group, the athletes moved to their chairs beside the vault run and started shedding their track suits and warming up. Payson not only spoke with Kelly, but she made small talk with the other girls as well. After having dealt with a bitchy Kelly Parker for so many years, Payson was adamant that she would never be like that. She was friendly with all of her competition, regardless of their threat status in the event.

The girls got to run through each of their vaults once, and Payson looked strong. She hadn't wobbled in ages. But Kelly looked like she was struggling.

He sidled over to Marty and leaned close to ask, "Is she going to be okay?"

Marty shook his head. "I don't know."

It was a miracle that she was able to compete all, considering the trauma she'd experienced so recently. Marty told him that when Nicky left Denver, Kelly was a wreck. At the time he didn't know about the abortion—he believed that she had taken time off because of her ankle—but he knew that something was deeply, deeply wrong. She walked around like a zombie, half the time not seeing what was in front of her, and at one point she sat down her vault and just didn't get up. He had to pick her up and carry her out of the gym, pretending like she'd hurt her ankle again, and sit her down on one of the tables in the trainer's room. She rolled over and cried, and for the next hour he sat silently beside her while she wept. He never asked questions, but for weeks afterward she would come into his office, curl up on his couch, and cry.

The competition started, and two coaches and two gymnasts talked as a group while the girls stretched lightly. Several times Payson reached out to her friend and rubbed between her shoulder blades, giving as much comfort and support as possible in the situation. Sasha had one eye on his girls and the other on the vault run and score boards, and they made it through the first five finalists with no surprises. There were only three girls left to compete: Ivanka, Kelly, and Payson. The three expected to take home the medals.

Ivanka took the podium, and Sasha had to admit that he understood why Kelly made fun of the Russian star's bangs and garish hair color. It was really ugly. After the close finish in the All Around finals, Kelly said that Ivanka probably got fourth place because her hair counted as a 'lack of artistry' deduction.

He pretended not to watch as she pounded down the runway, but he couldn't stop his sharp intake of breath during the split second she was in the air. In front of him, Payson asked, "Did she just do a double front?"

She must have seen it in her peripheral, because her back was turned against the vault run. He was beginning to realize that she was a lot more aware of what happened during competitions that he thought.

"Yeah, she did." It was a good one, too, but he wasn't about to say that to them. It wasn't perfect, but it was good, and the 7.1 DOD would give the score a sizable cushion. Suddenly Kelly's chances at silver looked a lot slimmer.

The score was good, a 15.875. Granted, Payson and Kaylie usually scored higher than that on their 6.5 vaults, but they were the exception, not the rule. Kelly's Amanar generally scored at around the same level, but her second vault, a Tsukahara double, started out five tenths less than the Amanar that Ivanka was about to do. Unless Ivanka blew her next vault, it was next to impossible for Kelly to beat her.

She didn't blow it. She came off the podium knowing that she was going home with at least a silver, maybe even a gold. Kelly wisely did not look at the score board. Instead she went to the podium and started chalking her hands and feet, oblivious to everything except Payson's hug of encouragement.

When the score came up (an average of 15.8375), Ivanka celebrated her inevitable victory. No matter what the Americans did, she was at the very least on the podium. Payson went to congratulate her, offering a handshake and the words, "Nice Produnova. That was awesome."

The Russian girl's uncertainty was almost comical. He would have looked the same way if one of his competitors had congratulated him like that when he was in Sydney. Payson was going above and beyond good sportsmanship.

"I'm not giving up," Payson continued, "But you might have just won Olympic gold. That's going to be tough to beat. Congratulations."

There was no doubting the sincerity in her voice, so Ivanka returned the gesture. "Thank you. But I will not hatch my chickens. You are very good."

Sasha chucked at the botched attempt to use an American idiom. Idioms never translated well between languages. But it was time for Kelly to vault, so Payson said "thank you" and moved back to watch her friend.

"Come on KP," she yelled, "You can do this."

It started off well, but Kelly had too much power off the table and couldn't control her momentum, so when she landed she kept moving forward, straight into a faceplant. He saw her pound her fist on the mat in frustration, but she kept her dignity and stood up to salute.

Marty held his hand on her shoulder as they walked back to the start of the lane, and her face was stone. She was pissed at herself. She re-chalked and stood talking to her coach during the seemingly endless interval before she got her score. Sasha knew what _he_ would be saying to her, but he had no idea what Marty might be saying. They were such different people that he never knew what was happening in the other man's head.

She didn't so much as glance at her score when it came up, which was a smart decision, because it wasn't good. A 14.9, the lowest she'd ever scored on that vault, but she couldn't let it get to her. She needed to come back strong.

Her Tsukahara double was good, exceptional, even, but it wouldn't be enough to make up the lost ground. Kelly was off the podium and Galina Nesterov of Russia was on it.

She came down the stair and into Payson's arms, where she let her mask crack and a sob escape. "It should have been Kaylie," she cried. "It should have been Kaylie, she's a better vaulter than me. She would never have made a mistake like that. It should have been her in the finals."

Payson took hold of her shoulders and pushed her a few inches away, so that they could see each other's faces, and said, "I don't want to hear that, Kelly, and neither does Kaylie. You earned your spot here and we're proud of you, fall or no fall. It took so much strength to come here and compete after what happened. You're _strong_, Kelly. You are so strong and I am so proud of you."

She clasped Kelly to her again, rocking gently back and forth as the girl cried, murmuring comforting sounds in her ear. He didn't want to break it up, because Kelly needed the release and the support, but he had no choice. Payson had to get up on that vault run.

He dropped a hand on Payson's shoulder, and she nodded. She signaled Marty to come over and passed her sobbing friend over to his arms. There were tear stains on the shoulder of her purple leo.

"I'm sorry," he said as they climbed the stairs onto the podium.

"Don't be," she said. "The timing sucks, but you didn't have a choice."

He pulled her closer and dropped a kiss on her head. "I'm still sorry. Good luck."

"Thanks." She lifted her lips to his for a quick kiss, and then went into her zone. She wasn't going to hear or see anything else until that green light flashed.

She needed to be perfect to beat Ivanka, and she very nearly was. He joined her as she walked back up the run for her next vault and said, "It'll be close. If you do the Amanar, you win hands down. If you do the double, it could go either way."

She threw a contemptuous glance at him, as if to say _why the hell are you telling me this?_ Out loud, she said, "I'm not even going to dignify that with a response."

"I know, I just figured I had to lay it out there." She hadn't trained the Amanar in weeks, and there was no way she would put Alex in danger just to win a medal. "You've still got a shot, even with the double. It's doable."

She didn't notice when her score posted, but he did. A 9.7 e-score on a 6.5 vault—that was 16.2, higher than Ivanka scored on her double front, but Payson's Yurchenko double only had a starting value of 5.8. It would be insanely close.

There was audible surprise around him when she flashed her vault number. She'd done the Amanar in competition before, so people knew she had it, and everyone expected her to pull it out of her bag of tricks in such a tight race. It had never been as good as her double, but the extra DOD would have made up for that and given her an extra few tenths. It was always a risk to do a shaky vault, and a non-pregnant Payson would have taken that risk. Now, she had something a lot more important than a medal on the line.

It was over in seconds, and then she was back down into his arms to wait for her score. Kelly had calmed down somewhat, so they sat together and held hands, which was an interesting dynamic. Kelly was trying to give support to Payson while she waited, and Payson was more focused on giving comfort to Kelly.

The crowd groaned when her score popped up just beneath Ivanka's. The Russian redhead beat her by little more than a hundreth of a point, about as close as two gymnasts could get. He felt rather bad for Ivanka, to get such a negative response to her victory. She beat the best gymnast in the world fair and square, and she deserved recognition for it. Payson wasn't shy about giving it.

"Congratulations," she said, shaking the new vault champion's hand again. "You were fantastic."

Again, Ivanka seemed confused by Payson's sincerity. It was a rare person who could accept losing with such grace. She recovered, though, and responded, "Thank you. I am honored to have such a fierce competitor."

'Fierce competitor' was right. She'd done the math; they all had. She had a .65 advantage in DOD over Payson, but she won by only .0125. In the public's mind, Payson would be the winner of this showdown. But in Payson's mind, Ivanka's victory was uncontestable. She would never knowingly take the glory away from someone else.

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><p>AN: I have to rat myself out. Kelly does a Yurchenko 2 ½ and a Tsukahara double, which are not allowed together in real competition. I didn't know that when I wrote this, because the rules for which vaults you can do are very confusing. They're supposed to change it for the next Code of Points to match the men's rules, which are much easier to understand. By those rules this combination would be allowed, so let's pretend that's how things work, K?

Also, pic of their leos on my pinterest.


	59. Chapter 59

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

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><p>The press room was set up with two tiered rows of tables for the twenty-odd gymnasts who had competed that day, with the medalists sitting front and center. Of those medalists, the vast majority of the attention was focused on Payson Keeler, vault silver medalist, and Austin Tucker, Olympic Champion on floor and pommel horse.<p>

The men's second rotations had ended spectacularly well for Austin and spectacularly bad for Max. It had a kind of symmetry to it—Payson's boyfriend took 1st place, while her ex took last place. It was possible that there was a causal relationship there. Of course, it was much _more_ possible that there was a causal relationship between Max's hangover and his multiple falls off the horse.

Sasha watched with a mixture of pride and amusement as the media fawned over Payson. There was something about her that drew people in like moths to a flame. Even Austin, now a six time Olympic gold medalist, was garnering his attention from being Payson Keeler's boyfriend.

Most of the attention was positive—praise and congratulations for her achievements, comments on how much healthier she looked and well wishes for her recovery, etc—but there were also the standard nosy questions about her medical problems and her relationship with Austin, and the one big question that needed to be answered about the competition. Everybody wanted to know why she didn't use the Amanar to win the gold.

"There is a very simple reason why I didn't do the Amanar," she said. "I don't have it anymore. It's always been shaky, which is why I don't use it as a regular competition vault, and I haven't trained it since I got sick. Attempting a skill that you haven't trained in weeks is a good way to get yourself killed"—she turned a significant look on Austin, who had the good sense to look ashamed—"and while a gold medal would have been nice, it's not worth that kind of risk. I was just as likely to blow it as I was to land it. Actually, I was probably _more_ likely to blow it."

The press conference wasn't wholly focused on Payson, though. The others got a share of the attention—not a fair share, mind you, but a share nonetheless—but much of it was unwanted. Ivanka was hounded by questions about her narrow win over Payson, with many reporters bringing up the discrepancy in their DODs and execution scores, but Payson would not stand for that abuse. She was passionate in her defense of Ivanka's win, and she left no room for argument. There wasn't much she could say to help Kelly, though.

Few people commented on her unexpected 5th place ranking. They were more interested in why the notoriously unflappable Kelly Parker had an emotional breakdown on live TV. She gave a mature, poised, and, most importantly, vague answer: "The mental game is a large part of competing, and I didn't have that in check today. I'm dealing with personal issues right now, and I unfortunately took that out onto the floor and let it affect my gymnastics. I am disappointed that I didn't reach my full potential today, but I'm ready to put that behind me and move on to the next step—supporting my friends on bars and beam, and competing on floor on Tuesday."

They pressured her to discuss her 'personal issues,' but Jake stepped in and said, "We've all had experiences in our lives that we don't feel comfortable discussing with complete strangers, so I'm sure that you can understand the position that Kelly is in. I realize that she is a public figure, but she has the same right to privacy as everyone else. Please respect that."

Sasha wanted to cheer. He liked this kid. Jake Dalton, along with Steven Legendre, had played bodyguard for Payson several times since they arrived in London, and Sasha respected the ethic behind the gesture. Both men had a mischievous streak a mile wide, but neither would stand for any woman being harassed, so they were just as quick to help the girls as they were to tease them. As long as one of them was around, all of the female athletes would have someone on their side.

Jake was asked about his disappointing 4th place finish, and his answer was a PR rep's dream. He was polite and gracious, complimented his competitors, and didn't blame himself or anybody else for the loss. He should have given lessons to Max, who used the oldest trick in the book to explain away his 8th place finish: he blamed the apparatus. He said that the handle was loose and it affected his balance, causing the falls. He had no answer for why the seven athletes who competed after him didn't have any problems with the handle.

Sasha was pretty sure that Max never got over the dual rejections of Payson and Austin, even though none of the three people involved were at fault. If they had come at separate times he might have dealt with it better, but to have been shot down by Austin and then dumped by Payson only a month later, with both happening during a time when he was confused about his life, that was hard to move on from. When Payson and Austin went public as a couple (even though it was fake at the time), Max went into a tailspin that he hadn't come out of yet.

All of the athletes were relieved when the conference was over. They were at the Olympics for the love of the sport, not the attention, and most of them hated dealing with the press. There were a few who were really good at it, like Payson and Kelly, but that didn't mean they liked it. In fact, Payson might hate it more than any of the other gymnasts, in large part because she was hounded so much more.

The five Americans worked their way to where their coaches were gathered near an exit. It was a strategic move planned by Sasha so that they could make a fast escape. He hated the media just as much as the younger gymnasts did, so he'd developed a playbook of ways to get away from them.

They caught a ride back to the Village, where the other girls already were because, as they informed him that morning, they needed more than an hour to get ready for Payson's party. They stayed just long enough to give their friends a hug after the final ceremony and then left, taking a more than willing Steven and Nicky with them. Nobody wanted to stick around for the media if they didn't have to.

He left them with strict instructions to be ready to leave by 6 o' clock, which he knew meant 6:15 at the earliest, so he didn't even bother to get dressed until six; it only took him a couple of minutes to don a suit and tie.

He skipped over the girls' apartment and went to collect Austin, who he could reasonably expect to be ready, and was surprised to find Payson there, sitting on the arm of the couch next to Austin and chatting with his teammates. She was dressed and ready, looking completely beautiful in a pinkish-beige dress that brought out the color in her skin and made her look healthy. She was still a little on the pale side, but as she regained her red blood cells she was also taking on a bit of a "pregnancy glow." It had more to do with being happy that anything to do with her skin, he thought.

"What are you doing in here?" he asked her.

She rolled her eyes. "Escaping. It's a zoo in my apartment. You'd think we were going to the Oscars instead of out to dinner."

"Yeah, I figured as much. I told them we needed to leave earlier than we really do, to build in time for the madness." He knew they would never be ready on time, so he made the reservation for seven and told them it was at six thirty.

"Genius, man," Austin said. "I'll keep that in mind. Luckily, I don't need that trick right now since Payson's never late."

"Damn," Payson swore, "If I was any other girl there would be a great joke there. I'm so frustrated that I can't make it."

"Huh?" Sasha and Austin said at the same time, while Steven and Jake looked at Payson like she was crazy. Nicky seemed to be the only one who got it, because he huffed out a laugh.

"Oh, never mind," she said. "You guys are clueless. Nicky, you're a man among apes. I don't know how you put up with it."

Sasha ignored the slight at his intelligence and said, "The other girls should be ready by now; we should get them."

Austin looked to Nicky. "Are you sure you don't want to come?"

"Nah," he said. "It might make Parks uncomfortable, and she's had a rough day already. I don't want to make things worse for her."

It was a tense moment, but Steven broke it by asking, "So why are we the only ones who didn't get an invite to this shindig? Don't you love us, Pay?"

He was joking, trying to steer the conversation away from a painful topic, but Payson paused to consider and then said, "You know what? You should come. You're kind of a part of this crazy little family now."

Steven looked like a deer caught in the headlights, unsure of how to respond. "I was kidding, Pay. I totally get that this is just for your closest friends. We're not trying to crash your birthday party."

"You're not crashing, you're invited. I wanted to invite you anyway, but... just, whatever you hear, keep it to yourselves. If you're okay with that, then I would really like for you to come. Like I said, you're part of the family now. We've officially adopted you."

Sasha could read their faces like books. They both wanted to come, and Payson had piqued their curiosity with her 'keep it to yourselves' caveat, but they also didn't want to intrude and didn't want Payson to feel obligated to bring them along. She didn't let them make a decision.

"Go change," she commanded, pointing to their bedroom. "I'm sure Lauren's not ready, so we can wait a few minutes for you to get dressed."

While Jake and Steven were putting on suits, Nicky excused himself to his room and came back out with a cardboard tube clutched in his hand. He gave it to Payson and said, "Happy birthday."

"Nicky, you didn't have to get me anything," she said.

"It's no big deal," he said, shrugging his shoulders uncomfortably. You didn't have to know Nicky Russo very long to figure out that he was uncomfortable with any sort of attention that didn't involve gymnastics. "I saw it and it made me think of you, for some pretty obvious reasons. Open it and you'll see why."

She pried the plastic cap off the end of the tube and pulled out a rolled up piece of paper. As she unrolled it, she gasped and said, "Oh, Nicky, this is amazing."

It was a print of a dancer performing Swan Lake, and the painting depicted her folded into the final pose of Payson's floor routine. Sasha understood what the boy meant by 'obvious reasons.' If he walked by this print in a store, he would automatically think of Payson, too.

"Nicky, this is perfect. Thank you so much." She gave him a hug, which he returned in an awkward but sincere fashion. In a way, Nicky Russo and Kelly Parker made perfect sense together. Nicky was shy and quiet and Kelly was loud and brash, but they both struggled with normal social interaction. They wouldn't have to try so hard together, because it's not quite as bad being awkward with another person who's also awkward. But the fact that they were so perfect for each other only made what happened to them all the more tragic.

By the time she rolled the paper up again and slid it back into its casing, the two boys emerged from their room, ready to go. They said goodbye to Nicky and asked him to check in on Max in a couple of hours to make sure to make sure that he wasn't drinking himself to death, and then left.

Lauren was already standing in the hall when they came out of the door, dressed to kill and exchanging barbs with a young African American man wearing USA colors. A wrestler, his jacket said.

Sasha recognized her stance. He'd seen it on women a million times, although never on Lauren. She was on the prowl. He was always wary of anything involving boys with this girl, but it was at least good to see such confidence on someone who struggled with insecurity. And the boy's attitude did a lot to ease Sasha's concern, as well. He recognized that from his own youth; the kid was trying really, _really_ hard to act cocky and self-assured, while doing a poor job of concealing the fact that he was crazy over the girl in front of him.

They both noticed the group approaching them and stepped farther apart. The young man didn't stick around. He winked, said, "See you later, Barbie," and left.

Payson watched him walk away and said, "You know, it's funny how none of us had ever seen him before that party on Friday, but since then you've run into him what, four, five times?"

"Shut up," Lauren snapped.

"Lauren, obviously the no dating rule is dead by now," he said, indicating Payson and Austin, "but you are at the Olympics and you have a real shot at a gold medal on Tuesday. Don't get distracted."

She tossed her hair and said, "Please. Like I would let _anything_ come between me and gold. So why are we even talking about this? Let's go party."

He let her get away with the distraction. "Sounds like a plan. Let's go."

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><p>AN: Ah, Steven and Jake. I heart them so much. In real life Jake placed 5th on floor, which broke my heart, but he really is one of the most gracious losers in the world. I'm sooooo pulling for him in 2016.

As always, pictures are up on my pinterest (flowerchild3286) on the board Amor Fati. I have all the girls' clothes and the print that Nicky gave Payson.


	60. Chapter 60

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

A/N: Ummm… oops. I think I was supposed to update this a few days ago.

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><p>"I'm glad you came, Kevin," Payson said as he helped her out of her car. Their towncars were lined up in front of Clos Maggiore, the restaurant Sasha made reservations at, and the men were playing at being gentlemen by escorting the women inside while one of the drivers carried in their packages.<p>

"I wouldn't have missed it for the world, little one," he responded. He couldn't have said no if he wanted to; it was impossible to deny Payson anything. Kevin understood why Sasha and Austin were wrapped around this little girl's finger. She was charming.

They were shown to a private room in the back, where the Keeler family was already waiting. They had picked up Ava Tucker on their way across town, since her hotel was only a few minutes away from the Olympic Village. As soon as she saw her parents, Payson abandoned his arm in favor of a hug from her father. He heard Mark Keeler whisper, "Happy birthday, sweetie. I can't believe my little girl is all grown up."

Grown up was right. Professional gymnastics throws girls into adulthood at a young age, and then when you add in the pregnancy and illness, Payson was well beyond her years. His youngest daughter was the same age, but he couldn't imagine his little girl going through everything that Payson was experiencing. He was glad that his daughters didn't have to grow up that fast.

They stood mingling while the staff added two more place settings to accommodate the additional guests, and Kim Keeler said, "You look beautiful tonight, Payson. That dress is lovely on you."

"Yeah, and the best part is that it has an elastic waistband," Payson said with a laugh, resting her hand low on her abdomen. "My normal clothes are starting to get uncomfortable."

Kaylie joined the conversation. "Really? You don't look any different yet."

"It's nothing noticeable. Austin says he can't tell a difference at all, and he would know better than anyone, but I can _feel_ a difference. Everything still fits, but my pants feel just a little too tight, like I ate too much at Thanksgiving."

Nearby, Jake and Steven were exchanging confused looks. From what Kevin gathered, Payson hadn't told them about the pregnancy but wasn't going to bother hiding it. It should be an interesting night.

Kim smiled indulgently. "Well get ready, sweetie, because things are going to keep getting tighter. You're lucky though, because when I was your age we didn't have the same kind of options that there are now. Clothes were either too big or too tight and there was nothing we could do about it. Now days they have bands that you can wear over unbuttoned jeans to make them fit."

Payson let out a throaty growl of longing. "Oh, unbuttoned jeans. That sounds like heaven right now. Seriously, I never thought that I'd be so glad that I spend most of my time in spandex. Leos don't fit any differently at all."

"Speaking of gymnastics," her dad said, changing the subject, "Congratulations on that silver medal today. But I hope that you aren't disappointed that you didn't get gold."

"Oh, God, no. I don't think I have any right to complain about a silver medal. I'm just thankful that I'm able to compete safely. Anything else is just icing on the cake at this point."

She was a truly spectacular person, thought Kevin. She had the potential to win six gold medals, and she would be the first female gymnasts to do so, but she wasn't a bit disappointed to have that possibility taken away so early. And if he was correct in his assumptions, she came to London with complete faith that Lauren would take the gold on beam. It was, in fact, a toss up between the two. Lauren was better, but not by much, and Payson had a higher DOD.

The wait staff finished their adjustments, and the group sat down with Payson at the head of the table. The others instinctually arranged themselves so that the people closest to Payson in life also had the seats closest to her, meaning that her family, Austin, and Sasha took the first few seats on either side of her, the girls were in the middle, and Kevin, Marty, and the men sat farthest away. The result was that, even though the dinner was boisterous at times, Jake and Steven heard very little of what Payson was discussing and didn't have a chance to validate the suspicions that were surely forming in their heads.

It was a fun evening. Kevin was glad that he came, and glad that his men came, as well. The men's team and women's team had not done a good job of bonding leading up to the Games, and Kevin had worried that they wouldn't present a united front, but somehow they managed to bridge the gap once the competition got into full swing. Now they were all becoming more of one family rather than two individual families, and this night proved it. Steven and Jake easily found a place in the group. It was unfortunate that Max and Nicky had failed romantic relationships standing in the way of bonding as a team, although Nicky seemed to be staying away more for Kelly's sake than his own. He fit in very well with the group under normal circumstances.

After the waiters cleared away the remnants of their dinner, Kim started the process of gift opening by placing a wrapped package in front of Payson. She worked her way through the pile, exclaiming over every gift. Kevin himself gave her a framed copy of the Sport Illustrated issue that came out on Thursday, with the cover featuring the girls in a tearful group hug during finals, and a matching frame for the planned cover that she was doing a photo shoot for later that week. The present earned him a hug from the birthday girl, who circled around the table to give it to him.

In the midst of typical birthday presents, a few were noteworthy. Emily gave her a biography of Albert Einstein, which surprised Kevin by the sheer depth of Payson's interests. Becca gave her a photo book which contained pictures of the two of them together throughout their lives, starting with a picture of a four year old Payson holding a newborn Becca on her lap and ending with a picture taken right after Payson won at the Olympic Trials.

"There's room to add more," Becca said, "So we can keep going with it."

Lauren gave her a seemingly innocent purse, with a note attached that said to look inside. As soon as Payson opened it, she propped her elbow on the table and dropped her head into her hand. She didn't say anything other than, "Oh my God, Lauren."

"There's another note in there," her friend chimed.

Payson didn't move, so Austin took the purse from her and looked into it. He repeated Payson's sentiment. "Oh my God, Lauren."

He pulled out another folded note and read, "Since your mom apparently neglected to include sex education in your homeschooling, here's lesson 1: these are important."

Payson recovered enough to retrieve the mysterious item, which turned out to be a pack of condoms, and toss it back to Lauren. "Here, use those with your little wrestler friend."

The smirking girl tucked the box into her bag without further ado and acted as if nothing unusual had occurred. Mark didn't look too pleased with the joke.

While Lauren's gag was memorable, it was the presents from Austin and Sasha that stood out the most. Austin's gift came in a small box, and when Payson removed the wrapping paper, a Swarovski logo was visible on the lid. She opened it and cooed, "Oh, you got me cloud turtles! This is so sweet."

She leaned over to kiss him, and Kevin found himself looking away from the intimate moment. It was a g-rated kiss, just a soft press of her lips to his, but the way he cradled her face and her eyes fluttered shut made him feel like an intruder. He wasn't the only one who suddenly found the wall fascinating, either, at least until Ava broke the moment by saying, "Sorry to interrupt, but what the hell is a cloud turtle?"

Payson stopped kissing her boyfriend and placed a tiny crystal turtle in the palm of her hand for everybody to see. "Back at the beginning," she explained, "We were laying out in Austin's backyard, just being cheesy and pointing out shapes in the clouds, and I kept seeing turtles. He said I was being unimaginative, because turtles are basically just circles with heads, but I think he was being _over_ imaginative. He kept saying things like, 'look, there's a donkey with a teapot on his head.'"

"It wasn't a donkey, it was a zebra."

"See what I mean?" she exclaimed. "How do you see a zebra in a cloud? He was just making stuff up. My cloud turtles were real."

"It was a good day," Austin said, drawing Payson into a world of their own. "It had its rough spots, but it was a good day."

She agreed. "It was. I'm glad I have something to remember it by now."

She kissed him again, and this time it was a little more than g-rated until Marty cleared his throat significantly.

Sasha's gift was the last one that she opened. It was a large box, well wrapped with a large ribbon tied around it. Payson said, "I'm guessing you didn't wrap this yourself. You can barely fold a letter into an envelope."

"Uh, no," he admitted. "I gave it to your mum and let her do that."

She chuckled as she untied the ribbon and slid her fingers beneath the tape. She never ripped or tore any of the paper. She unfolded it with as few tears as possible. She opened the box with a sharp intake of breath.

Kevin couldn't see what was inside, but she was staring at it with awe, trailing her fingers over what Sasha had given her. A tear escaped from her eye and she was out of her chair like lightening to hug her coach. They held on to each other for too long, but nobody had the heart to break the moment. Sasha's gift, whatever it was, had deeply affected Payson.

She loosened her grip on him and wiped her eyes, saying, "Thank you, Sasha. Thank you so much."

"I can't take all the credit," he said. "It was your mum's idea."

Kim spoke up from the other side of the table. "Don't you dare listen to him. I gave him a suggestion, but he did all the leg work."

"Come on, Payson, I'm dying with curiosity," Becca said, bouncing in her seat. "Mom wouldn't let me see it. What did he get you?"

Payson moved back to her seat and drew the gift out of the box, letting folds of brightly colored fabric fall loose.

"It's a baby blanket," she said. She traced the outline of the circus animals covering the surface, focusing on the elephant that covered the center panel and the letters embroidered above it. "Austin, look. 'A.T.' Austin Tucker, Ava Tucker, and now Alex Tucker. We're following a tradition."

"Or Aly Tucker. You don't know that it's a boy." Something in Sasha's playful tone said that this was a conversation they'd had many times before.

Payson smiled but didn't take her eyes away from the blanket she was examining. "Yes I do. Just because I don't have a picture to tell me for sure doesn't mean that I don't know. It's mother's intuition."

Kelly moved to stand behind Payson and look at the blanket and trace the letters like Payson had. Kevin couldn't be sure, but he thought that she was spelling out a different set of letters, one that ended with the letter R. She said, "This is beautiful, Sasha."

"It really is," Kim agreed. "When I told you to get her something for the baby, I never dreamed that you would find such a thoughtful gift. You did a good job."

"Uhh," Jake said, and everybody looked at him. "I'm going to go ahead and ask the stupid question here, just to make sure that I'm not hugely misinterpreting everything that's gone on tonight. You're pregnant?"

"I prefer to use the term knocked up." Only Lauren Tanner would say something like that. "Since it was in no way on purpose."

"Lauren." Payson managed to chastise her friend with a single word and the slightest flick of her eyes toward Kelly. 'Knocked up' was not a good word choice to use in front of their struggling teammate right now. "Yes, I'm pregnant, and nobody knows it but my family. Like I said earlier, you're part of the family now."

It was interesting to know that when Payson said 'her family,' she meant everybody in the room. It was even more interesting to know just how accurate the term was.

To Kevin's right, Steven floundered for words and came up with, "Uh, congratulations?"

Austin laughed and pretended like Steven's words had been a statement rather than a question. "Thanks, man. I know the timing sucks, but we're really happy about it. I mean, getting to have a kid that's part Payson, who wouldn't be happy about that?"

Kevin remembered how he felt when his first daughter was born, how amazed he was that he got to help create this little person that was part him and part Laura, and how he was certain that she got all her good qualities from Laura. Watching Payson and Austin together tonight, he knew that Austin was feeling the very same things. He would be just as wrapped around his child's finger as he was around Payson's.

o-O-o

Payson had most of her birthday presents neatly stacked on the spare bed, but a few of them were in places of honor. Becca's photo album was open on the bedside table, turned to a page that showed the two sisters ice skating together in Minnesota, Austin's turtles were next to it, nose to nose like they were kissing (after all this time she still managed to surprise him. It was such a sweet, childlike way to arrange the figurines), and the baby blanket was spread out on the bed before her. She was sitting cross legged at the head of her bed, still tracing the circus patterns, and over and over again running her fingers across the baby's initials. She was hypnotized by it.

He came to sit behind her on the bed. He let his legs settle on either side of hers and wrapped his arms around her waist. She leaned into him.

"I'm glad you like it," he said. He'd worried about how she would react to the gift.

"I don't like it, I love it. It's perfect." She slowed her hands to a stop and let them rest on top of the small red 'A.T.' "I bet he'll look just like Austin, since I'm one big mess of recessive genes."

"Except for the eyes. Green is less recessive than blue, so he'll probably have your eyes."

"Oh, and my curly hair, too." She grimaced. "If he has curly hair, we're keeping it cut short. I will not have my son looking like Carter Anderson."

He couldn't help but laugh. She had a point. He wouldn't want his son to look like Carter Anderson either.

"Okay," he said, "so we'll hope for no curly hair if it's a boy. I have something else we need to talk about, though. I have another present for you."

"Another present?" she asked, her eyebrows knit together.

"Yeah." He stood up and retrieved a small Tiffany's box from the pocket of his jeans, which were folded up on the end of the other bed. He picked up the blanket, folded it, and sat it with her other presents before taking its former place in front of her. He handed her the box.

"Happy birthday, Payson."

She was still confused, but she opened the box to reveal a small golden band with an inscription: Payson Keeler – 2012 All Around Olympic Champion. The words wrapped almost all the way around the ring, and the small space left was filled with a tiny engraving of the Olympic Rings. She looked from the box to him, eyes wide.

"Sasha, you must have had this made ages ago, long before I won."

"I never doubted you. I've know you were going to win the All Around since you showed up at your first Junior Nationals when you were eleven years old." He'd watched that meet on TV, bored with the vast majority of candidates that year until this fidgeting, nervous little girl stepped up to the vault and landed a double Yurchenko, a move that many girls in the seniors we still aspiring to.

She looked doubtful. "Sasha, I did horrible at that Nationals. I fell off the bars and sat down one of my tumbling passes on floor. There is no way you saw me compete that badly and knew that I would win the Olympic All Around."

"You were _eleven_," he said. He couldn't believe that she was criticizing herself for being nervous at Nationals when she was that young. Actually, he could believe it, but that didn't make it any less ridiculous. "I recognized your potential even then."

Her doubt changed to a wide smile and she teased, "So you had this ring made in 2005?"

"No, cheeky, I had it made a couple of months ago. It was always meant to be a birthday present."

"So why the blanket?" she asked, confused again. "Don't get me wrong, I'm so thankful for it, but why did you get me something else if you already had this?"

"I didn't think this was something I should give you in front of other people." People already thought that they were too close, and this ring could be misinterpreted as something romantic.

She nodded. "I can see that. It could look like it's something it's not."

"Exactly." He picked up the ring and slid it onto her right ring finger. "So this is just for us. I am so proud of you, Payson. You're the most amazing person I've ever met and I'm honored to be a part of your life."

"I feel the exact same way about you," she said, taking hold of his hand and squeezing it. "Not a day goes by that I don't feel thankful that I know you. I can't imagine what my life would be like if you never came to the Rock."

He kissed her and said, "Luckily, we'll never have to find out."

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><p>AN: There are tons of pics up on my twitter for this chapter. The girls dresses, Payson's shoes, and Sasha and Austin's gifts.

So did that last scene feel a little like wedding vows? 'Cause that's what I was going for.


	61. Chapter 61

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

A/N: I think the show was a little confused about men's gymnastics. (Actually, I think they were a little confused about gymnastics in general.) Nicky Russo would totally be a rings worker. Carter Anderson, who they called a "rings specialist" wouldn't have a shot in hell on the rings. It's all about muscle mass.

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><p>Austin never thought he'd be so happy to have somebody else standing above him with the gold. He was beginning to think of Nicky as something like a younger brother, and he wanted the kid to win Olympic gold. It had been a tough race between them, but in the end Nicky Russo was the still rings Olympic Champion, and Austin was the silver medalist. Nobody was really surprised, except maybe the novice spectators who only knew what the media put out. Austin was touted as the golden boy, but when it came right down to it, Nicky was the better rings worker.<p>

Exiting the arena, Payson and Emily met them in the tunnel with hugs for them both, although Austin got the added benefit of a kiss from Payson. They wished the girls a hurried good luck before they were shooed away by an event coordinator. It was the same one who had glared at him and Payson the day before.

Austin was done for the day. The second event for the men would be vault, and he hadn't even come close to qualifying for the finals. His height was a disadvantage, but on most apparatuses he could find a way to compensate for that by altering his style. Vault was different. At six foot one, he was just too tall to do the more difficult vaults. So he was free to shower and head up to the stands, where he could watch Payson and Emily on bars and Nicky on vault.

He took as little time as possible getting showered and changed. There were announcements, warm ups, and five girls to compete before Emily was up, but he wanted to see as much of the competition as he could. It was next to impossible for anyone other than Genghi, Emily, and Payson to medal, but there was always the chance that someone would come out of the woodwork like he'd done during the All Around finals in Beijing. He'd jumped from eighteenth to first. There were never any guarantees.

Nicky was still cooling down, being much more careful than Austin had been since he had to compete again in less than an hour. Doubling up during event finals was always tricky, because you couldn't stay warm during the whole wait, so you had to cool down, rest for a few minutes, and then warm up again. Competing All Around took a toll on the body, but competing in multiple event finals could take a toll, too, just in a different way.

Austin clapped his hand on his friend's shoulder. "Good luck, man. Go win yourself another gold medal."

"I'll do my best." Nicky, unlike Austin, would never predict a win for himself, no matter how likely it was. He shared that trait with Payson and it had developed at some point after last year's Nationals, much like it did for Payson. They both wanted to win but were humble about their chances. Humility was a foreign concept to Austin.

He followed the blocked off path to the stands. It was the only way to avoid being trampled by fans. When he reached the athlete area he had to climb over the national teams of several other countries and apologize for blocking their view before he could reach the Americans, where a seat was saved for him next to his sister.

Ava was sitting next to Lauren, who was one of her favorites from the group. She and Payson might as well be sisters already, and she got on really well with Lauren and Emily. She could have been good friends with Kelly, he thought, if circumstance had been different, but Ava's growing friendship with Nicky made that awkward.

Between Kelly and Nicky themselves there was no awkwardness and no blame, but a whole lot of pain. It would be a long time, if ever, before they could be together without thinking about what they lost. Austin couldn't imagine being in their situation. Mark might hate him, but neither he nor Kim would ever force Payson into an abortion.

He forced himself away from the dark thoughts. There were enough concerns with Payson's pregnancy without fixating on abortion. It didn't happen and wasn't going to happen, and he wasn't going to think about it.

"What's happened so far?" he asked Ava. The best way to stop his current train of thought was to replace it with a new one.

"Nothing significant," she said. "The screams almost knocked the walls down when they announced Payson. Kimika Sato fell during warm ups but she's fine. Carolina Jayme performed really well, but nothing unexpected. She might move up to seventh, but I doubt she'll go any higher unless someone bombs."

She ended her concise recap with, "Oh, congratulations, by the way."

It didn't take long for her to be disenchanted with his success. She was really excited for him during the All Around finals, when she was still riding on the high of seeing him for the first time in a year and being at a live gymnastics competition for the first time in three years. After that, he was back to being her annoying older brother who happened to win Olympic medals. He liked her both ways. It was great to have her so excited for him, but it was also great to know that his success didn't put any kind of strain on their relationship. She didn't resent him for having what she couldn't have.

For the next four finalists, the competition was uneventful. There was a small amount of shuffling in the ranks, but nothing more than a change of one place in either direction, with the exception of Kimika Sato. She fell again while she was competing and dropped from fifth place to eighth. Things didn't get interesting, though, until Emily stepped on to the podium.

The fanfare was huge. Like the rest of the American team, she was a crowd favorite, especially on bars. She and Lauren garnered a lot more attention on their specialty apparatuses than they did in an All Around or team competition because they were so far and above the rest of the field.

He saw her searching the stands, and it was no mystery who she was looking for. The smile that graced her face said that she'd found Damon in the crowd. She blew him a kiss, which the fans loved, and then squared off to the bars and waited for the start signal. Austin could feel the energy she was radiating all the way across the stands. She was going to rock.

Once she saluted, the world stopped for sixty seconds while she defied gravity. It was the best she'd ever performed it, reaching execution levels almost as high as Payson, and her full in back out dismount was flawless. There wasn't a single deduction to be made for that dismount—perfect stretch, perfect rotation, legs glued together, feet straight and pointed, not the slightest hop in the landing. The pickiest judge in the world couldn't find a tenth to take off on that skill.

Sasha had a different way of celebrating with each of his gymnasts, and for Emily it was always that he picked her up and spun her around. This time he spun her around twice. She couldn't have asked for a better set in the event finals. Genghi was second coming into the finals, but after that routine, there was a good chance that Emily could overtake her.

She sat down to wait for her scores and put up the standard façade of not caring. Sometimes Emily didn't have to fake it, because she was so laid back, but Austin could tell that she was anxious this time. She knew how close it would be.

When her name finally came up on the scoreboard it was, unsurprisingly, at the top, and the number was huge. A 16.575, the highest she'd scored at the Games so far and higher than any of Genghi's previous scores. Genghi would have to pull out all the stops if she wanted to take the silver.

Payson was competing next, so she couldn't watch Genghi's routine, but Sasha stayed sitting next to Emily and holding her hand as the tiny Chinese gymnast performed an excellent set. It wasn't quite as good as Emily, but she had an extra tenth of a point in difficulty value to aid her.

The tension was palpable as the whole arena waited to see who would win in the showdown between Genghi Cho and Emily Kmetko.

The scores posted and there was several seconds of baffled silence while the crowd interpreted what they saw:

D-Score E-Score Total Gap

1 Kmetko, Emily USA 7.4 9.175 16.575 0.0

2 Cho, Genghi CHN 7.5 9.075 16.575 0.0

Someone screamed—he couldn't be sure, but Austin thought it might have been Damon—and that triggered an explosion of noise. It was unbelievable. For the second Olympiad in a row, there was a tie on the uneven bars between China and the U.S., but this time the U.S. came out on top. Ties were broken by who had the fewest deductions taken, and Emily's execution score was a full tenth of a point above Genghi's. Unless a disaster happened to knock Payson out of first place, Emily was taking home a silver medal on bars.

Payson was already on the podium chalking up when the scores posted, but she leaned over the side to give Emily a hug. When they separated, Emily had chalk hand prints on the back of her black leo. (So much for black leos being bad luck.)

The competition was held up for a few minutes while inquiries were made about the tie, so Payson wasn't able to perform immediately. She stood on the podium stretching out her arms and neck, waiting for the judges to be freed up, and during the delay a reporter managed to wrangle his way up into the athletes section and shove a microphone in Austin's face.

"Austin Tucker, we've just witnessed history in the uneven bars event finals"—history repeated, Austin thought. The same thing happened in 2008 with Nastia Liukin and He Kexin—"and fellow American Emily Kmetko stepped into first place. How do you feel about that?"

He felt annoyed, but that had nothing to do with Emily and everything to do with the reporter. "I'm very proud of Emily. She's one of the best bars workers in the world and she really deserves this."

"There has been a bit of a hold up, but we're waiting for your girlfriend, Payson Keeler, to finish out this competition and many expect her to take home the gold. What's going through your head right now while you wait for Payson to compete?"

"I just want it to be over. Payson's bars set scares the shit out of me and I'm never fully comfortable until she's back on the ground." His agent was going to be pissed about that answer, but he couldn't think of the appropriate lie at the moment.

"What scares you so much about this routine?"

Duh, the fact that it's incredibly dangerous. "The reason that Payson's DOD is so high is because the skills she does are so hard, and hard means dangerous. She is more than capable, but that doesn't mean that I'm ever going to stop being nervous while she competes, just like she'll never stop being nervous when I compete."

An announcement blared that the competition was about to resume, so the reporter had no choice but to leave, which Austin was thankful for. He always hated reporters, but he couldn't remember his standard BS when Payson was about to compete.

She re-chalked after having waited so long, and then saluted the judges. She looked healthier than she did the last few times she competed on the apparatus, which eased his worry by a fraction, but it was still no guarantee that she would be safe.

He watched as she did death-defying tricks one right after another. First there was the Schaposchnikova, which she broke her back on last year, and then the insane pirouette sequence that should be physically impossible and was for most gymnasts. If she didn't have such perfect execution it _would_ be impossible, because even the slightest leg separation or bend in her elbow would knock her out of the perfect balance required for the combination. Then there was the forward pike out of a backswing, which was possibly the stupidest thing she'd ever done in any routine. That was so hard that she couldn't even get full difficulty points for it, because the skill directly below it was already rated at a G. God, he hated this routine.

Without realizing, he held his breath through the entire set, which was longer than most others because there was so much in it. When she landed her double double stretched with a perfect stick, he drew in a breath and noticed that he was in desperate need of oxygen. It was one more routine that she got through safely, and there was only one day of competition left. In little more than twenty four hours she would be done with gymnastics.

The crowd cheered for her victory, because it was obvious that she won, but down on the floor she was waiting for her score to celebrate. It seemed impossible, but when the score came up the audience got even louder.

D-Score E-Score Total Gap

1 Keeler, Payson USA 7.9 9.3 17.2 0.0

2 Kmetko, Emily USA 7.4 9.175 16.575 0.625

3 Cho, Genghi CHN 7.5 9.075 16.575 0.625

She was smiling and hugging her coach and Emily, but she and Sasha were talking and glancing at the scoreboard, seemingly basking in her name being at the top of the board. Austin saw what everybody else missed.

"Oh-ho, she's pissed."

"You think?" Kaylie asked.

"Yeah, definitely pissed," he said. "Ready to spit fire."

Beside him, Steven asked, "Why would she be mad? She won."

"Yeah, but they underscored her. There were not seven tenths worth of deductions in there; she was perfect." She was obviously still excited about her win, but Payson competed against herself more than anyone else, and her score tonight came in lower than what she'd been scoring over the past week and that was sure to rub her raw.

He only caught two tenths that could be deducted, and those were iffy at best, but he wasn't a judge and wasn't as familiar with women's gymnastics as he was with men's. He called to the other end of their row for a better opinion. "Hey Marty, what do you rate that as? I only saw two tenths off, but you're the expert."

"I got a 9.5, 9.6, depending on how harsh you want to be. Definitely not 9.3. I don't know where they got that score."

"I figure they did it on purpose," Ava said. "It wasn't like it was going to affect her placement since she was so far ahead, so I think they just deducted really hard so it doesn't look like she's getting special treatment just because she's the favorite."

Lauren frowned. "So do you think they'll do it again tomorrow?"

"I doubt it," Ava said. "They can't do it on beam, because there it actually could affect the placement. It's so close between the two of you that unfair judging on either side might affect the medals, or at the very least affect the way people view the medals. Like, if you legitimately beat Payson but they underscored her, there would always be douchebags who say that you didn't deserve the gold, even though you did." There were already people saying that about Ivanka, even though she beat Payson fair and square. "So beam's out. And then on floor, you would have to have a heart of stone to underscore her. She has such an emotional impact on people that it would be impossible to stay mean enough to do something like that."

Sometime he forgot just how damn smart his sister was. She could read a situation better than anyone he knew and almost always be right.

Payson might be pissed about her score, but she didn't let that rain on her gold medal parade. Once she was up on the podium, she was all smiles, and they were real this time. Once they took the standard photos of the girls with their medals, Payson pulled Emily up with her on the gold medal platform to take pictures that way, which the photographers ate up. Genghi was standing alone below them, and Payson took pity and pulled her up with them for group pictures. It was almost certain to be the only time that the tiny girl stood on the gold medal platform.

Austin felt a little bad for Genghi. Bronze seemed to be her color at this Olympics. She beat out Ivanka for a bronze in the All Around, but Ivanka managed to pull off a gold on the vault to make up for it. The Chinese gymnast didn't have that possibility. She was in the beam finals, but unless somebody fell, those medals would be going to Lauren, Payson, and Ivanka. Then on floor, she had been favored to win bronze, maybe even silver if she had a spectacular day, but Elisabeta Petrescu's upgrades made that a lot less likely. The chances were that Genghi Cho, once considered the greatest gymnast in the world, would be going home with two bronze medals.

Men's vault was up next, and even though the cheers were nothing like what the women got, it was still huge, especially for Nicky since he'd just won a gold medal on rings. The athletes were announced by their highest individual medal, if they had one, or their team medal if they had one of those. Nicky started the All Around competition as "gold medalist in the team competition." When he was introduced earlier in the day he was "All Around bronze medalist." Now he was "Nicholas Russo, Olympic Champion on the still rings." It was a title that would stick with him, too, until he beat it in the 2016 Olympics. Olympic Championships never wore out. Austin started the competition this year as "Austin Tucker, 2008 All Around Olympic Champion." After he won his second All Around, the announcers dropped the 2008 from his title. The 2012 part would go unspoken until the selection process started for the 2016 Games.

Nicky did two gigantic vaults, both out of a 7.2. The first was essentially Payson's vault with an extra twist: a round off, half on, two and a half off. They trained the skills at separate gyms, so it was just a funny coincidence that they ended up with such similar vaults. The second was a Dragulescu piked, which was Ivanka Kirilenko's vault made insanely more difficult: a double front, but piked and with a half twist. His vaults were the perfect showcase for how different the bodies of men and women were. Sheer muscle mass gave him the power to make the vaults more complex than the women could.

Vault rotations went fast, so four men had competed by the time Payson, Emily, and Sasha made it to the stands. The girls were braving it by being in public with wet hair and no make up, but they wanted to see Nicky compete. They couldn't go to the press conference looking like that, but they could push off the girly stuff at least long enough to watch the rest of the rotation.

The congratulations were fairly subdued, because the people behind them would get angry if they stood up or talked too loud, but everybody made sure that Payson and Emily knew how proud there were. Emily and Sasha wedged their way to the end of the row, where there were seats still open by Marty, but Payson chose to sit in Austin's lap instead. She leaned back against his chest so that they could speak quietly without being overheard.

"So how angry are you?" he asked.

"I'm not angry, babe. I won gold. I have nothing to be angry about."

"Don't press conference me," he scoffed. "I'm not going to judge you, so you don't have to pretend."

She sighed and dropped her head on his shoulder. "Okay, fine, I'm pissed. I won gold and I'm pissed off about a few tenths of a point. I'm a horrible person."

"No you're not. You're a wonderful person. You got underscored, it's okay to be mad about that. But you didn't let it spoil the win for you, and that's what's important." He kissed her temple, and then her nose, and then hovered over her lips and waited until she bridged the distance between them.

It was a playful kiss, a chasing series of their lips and breaths mingling together with smiles and laughs in between, and it could have continued for a long time if Ava hadn't elbowed him and muttered, "You're on the JumboTron."

"Wha…?" He trailed off when he realized what she was talking about. A camera was zooming in on them and broadcasting a video of them kissing on the massive screen. He was less embarrassed than guilty. This was hardly the worst of what they'd done on camera, and MJ said for them to kiss in public as much as possible, but it wasn't fair to the athletes competing below. They were all exceptional, and it was unfair to take the attention away from them with something so frivolous.

She settled back against him again with the faintest hint of a blush and redirected the conversation. "What's happened so far? Have there been any surprises?"

"Actually, yeah." Unlike the women's bars, where everyone performed more or less as expected, there had been a few upsets in the men's vault competition so far. "Dominik Kastner blew his double pike and under rotated his Kasamatsu one and a half so badly that he got knocked down to a full, so he dropped to last place. And Patrick Campbell came out of nowhere with a Kasamatsu two and a half. Now he's got a vault named after him and a real shot at the gold."

"Wow." She looked impressed. "A two and half, that would be a 7.4, right? That's amazing. What's his other vault?"

" A Dragulescu. His DOD averages the same as Nicky now, so it all comes down to execution. It could go either way." Of course he was rooting for Nicky, but nobody would resent the other man if he won. Campbell was British, so if he took the gold he would be a hometown hero.

There were no other surprises; nobody fell and nobody else pulled a brand new vault out of their ass like Campbell did. Nicky was the last athlete to vault, having qualified in first place, and the gold was hanging in the balance. Campbell had an average of 16.5, so Nicky needed to average at least a 16.5125 to take the gold. Austin guessed there could be another tie and tie breaker, but he doubted it. Ties weren't common.

The first vault, his half on two and a half, was fantastic, scoring a 16.475. Austin did the math in his head, but Payson was faster. She whispered, "He needs a 16.55. He can do it."

Nicky repositioned himself at the end of the run, and Payson clenched his hand so hard that it hurt. When his friend pounded toward the vaulting table, Austin squeezed her hand back. It was over in seconds, and it was nearly perfect, but would _nearly_ perfect be good enough?

The wait was as loaded for the men's vault results as it was for the women's, but this time the crowd wasn't pulling for the American athlete. The majority of people in the stands were England Nationals, and they were hoping for a victory of their own.

The scores posted, the crowd erupted, and Payson groaned. Nicky's name was listed second. He scored a 16.5 on his second vault, meaning that he lost by .0125 in their average scores. It was literally the smallest margin that a gymnast could lose by on the vault.

The screen was showing footage of Patrick as he realized he was an Olympic Champion, pumping his fist in the air, hugging his coaches, and crying. The Olympics were one of the few places where a guy could cry on live television and not be judged for it. Nicky stepped into the camera frame to shake Campbell's hand and congratulate him, and he didn't give away the slightest hint of disappointment. He was disappointed, Austin was sure, but he could hide it well enough, and his win on rings did a lot to ease the sting of the loss. It was easier to be gracious when you already had a gold medal.

Payson and Emily sneaked back the locker rooms to get ready for the press conference, but since Austin didn't need to mess with hair and make up he could stay and watch the medal ceremony. It was like déjà vu, watching Nicky standing where he had been himself, little more than an hour ago. He had been happy to stand on the silver medal platform below someone who deserved the gold, and he hoped—no, thought, really—that Nicky felt the same way about standing beneath Patrick Campbell.

* * *

><p>AN: Okay, so in real life Jake and Steven are both vault specialists, but I wanted Nicky to be the only one on vault, so Jake had floor (also his real life specialty) and Steven got moved to parallel bars. Also, I'm amused that I wrote a tie in this months ago and then two real life ties happened :)

I really want to go play on my Paystin playground, but I'm sticking with Amor Fati so that I can finish it. Be grateful lol ;)


	62. Chapter 62

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

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><p>Payson grunted when Austin slammed her up against the door of his apartment, and it was quite possibly one of the sexiest sounds he'd ever heard. She removed her tongue from his mouth just long enough to ask, "Do you think Olympic medals are an aphrodisiac?"<p>

"Oh, hell yes," he said. "Gold looks hot on you."

He stopped kissing her while he unlocked the door, knowing from experience that fumbling to get a key in a keyhole never worked well. He would get inside the apartment, and consequently Payson into his bed, much faster if he paid attention to what he was doing. She was making it hard, though, by nibbling on his neck and sliding her fingers beneath the hem of his shirt.

They stumbled backward as he opened the door, but he made quick work of regaining his balance and lifting her to wrap her legs around his waist. She reached down and pulled her shirt over her head, but before she tossed it aside they were interrupted by a loud "Whoa! Hold up."

Payson squeaked and dropped her legs back down to the floor. "What the hell are you doing here?"

"Uh, this is our apartment," Steven said. "I think the better question is why are you guys going at it in our living room?"

Payson seemed to realize that she was topless, and she spun around while she put her shirt back on. Austin drew the attention away from her by saying, "You're supposed to be in the girls' apartment for a party. That's why we came here instead. Why are you here?"

"We came to get the Wii," Jake said. He held up the gaming remotes in explanation. He was bright red.

"Okay," Payson said, turning back around. "You've got the Wii now, so you go celebrate in our apartment, and Austin and I are going to go celebrate in here."

She dragged him into his bedroom and slammed the door behind them. He laughed.

"I can't believe you just did that."

Her only response was to jerk his shirt up over his head. She pressed her lips against his bare skin and he decided that he didn't care that she'd basically just told his friends to go away so that they could have sex. He only cared that they actually did go away.

He could tell that she really was feeling better, because she had the same kind of energy that she had that day in his backyard, before she got sick. Long after he was worn out, she was still straddling his waist and pressing kisses across his chest.

"So you're what," she asked, working her way up to his neck, "six for fourteen now? How do I measure up?"

He rolled them over so that he was hovering above her, and then laid down beside her and cradled her in his arms. "Okay, I'm six for fourteen, that's a little less than fifty percent, and you're three for four, that's seventy-five percent. I think you're winning."

"But if you just look at this year, you're four for six, and that's a lot closer."

"Does it bother you, losing on vault?" he asked. It had been weighing on his mind. "You would have won if you weren't pregnant. The only reason you didn't do the two and half is because of the baby."

"Why would I want a gold medal when I could have Alex? He's worth a million medals." There was complete honesty in her eyes. She didn't care that she missed out on the vault championship. He thought she'd chosen Alex over winning, but he was wrong. To her, there was never even a choice to make.

He smiled and drew her in for a kiss, but he stopped before it could get out of hand. "We need to head back to your place for the party. We've been gone long enough."

"But we're having our own party," she pouted.

"Uh-uh, we're going. We are not going to bail on our friends." He stood up and threw her over his shoulder. "Come on, we're taking a shower."

"No!" she shrieked. She pounded on his back and tried to make him put her down. "Okay, okay, we'll go to the party, but I am not going out there naked! One of your roommates could come back."

He sat her back on her feet and grinned. He wasn't going to open the door and she knew it. "Fine, put some clothes on. Let's go."

When they walked into the girls' apartment fifteen minutes later, Payson's wet hair piled on top of her head, they were met with catcalls from all their friends. It was no secret what they'd been doing alone in his apartment. Payson waved off the attention and plopped onto the floor beside Lauren.

He noted the absence of Kelly and Nicky but didn't comment on it. Whether they were hiding from each other or off somewhere talking, it was none of his business. Max wasn't there, either. Pommel was his last event, and he decided not to stick around for the end of competition like Jake and Nicky were doing. He left early that morning.

He was distracted from his thoughts by a loud groan from Steven and Jake. He scanned the room to find the reason for their protest, and his eyes landed on Lauren. She was holding up a movie, and it was one that he was all too familiar with now: Stick It. He groaned, too.

o-O-o

Nicky and Kelly made their way up to the roof of their building, a place that the athletes were not intended to see, but it was the most private place he could think of in the over-crowded Village. They had to talk before Kelly competed on floor the next day.

"I'm worried about you, Parks. You're not handling this well, and I don't understand why. I mean, obviously I understand _why_, but I don't understand why _now_. What changed?" The question had been bothering him. It had been nearly a year, and he didn't understand why she decided to come clean to him, or why she was crumbling under the pain now, after all this time.

She walked to the edge of the roof and stood looking over the skyline. A place to keep her eyes so that she didn't have to look at him, because that hurt too much. He knew she was feeling that way, because he felt that way, too.

"I think I've lied to myself about it this whole time. I kept telling myself that it didn't happen, that it was all a bad dream or something. I was never pregnant and I didn't have an abortion." Her voice cracked, so she took a deep breath and a long pause before she continued. "You know how, when you hurt yourself during a competition and they spray that numbing stuff on it before they wrap it, you can pretend like you're not really injured? Like, if you don't feel the pain, the injury isn't there. It was like that. I was numb. I couldn't feel anything, so I convinced myself that none of it was real."

"So what changed?" he asked.

"Payson."

The name hung in the air, and for the first time he thought about how hard it must be for her to be around someone who was pregnant, and especially with those circumstances. Payson got pregnant on accident, too, but she was so happy about it. It was the 'what if' come to life.

Kelly continued, "She didn't tell me. I figured it out on my own. And everything came crashing down on me, all these memories of experiencing things that she was experiencing now. I couldn't pretend anymore, because I was remembering all these things that I made myself forget, and it just kept getting worse. Every day I remembered something else. Every day it hurt more."

She finally turned to look at him, and it broke his heart to see the pain in her eyes. It hurt so bad for him, but he would never, ever be able to understand how broken she was because he wasn't the one who carried the baby. "I _hate_ myself, Nick. I hate that I'm standing here talking to you when our baby is dead. I hate that I'm at the Olympics winning stupid medals, like I have some kind of right to be celebrated, when I destroyed my child. I killed someone for a fucking medal."

Hearing her, he knew that his suspicious were right. She didn't blow that vault the day before because she was emotional or because her head wasn't in the game. She blew it because, on some level, she was punishing herself. She didn't think she deserved that medal, and she was pretending—maybe even believed—that it was because she knew Kaylie was better, but it would just keep going. She would find a reason that she didn't deserve floor, and a reason that she didn't deserve whatever the next good thing to come along was. She didn't think she deserved anything good because of what she did.

"Parks, this isn't your fault." He took her face in his hands so that she couldn't look away, because this was too important. "And I know that I should have done a better job of protecting you, but it isn't my fault either, not really. I'm not even sure that it's your mom's fault, because she's so messed up that I don't think she has a grasp on reality anymore. I know that you want to undo the abortion, but you can't, and punishing yourself is not going to bring the baby back. You have to forgive yourself."

"How do I do that? Tell me how to do that, Nick, because I don't think I can!" She was yelling, but it wasn't at him. It was at herself. "How do I move past this?"

"You get help. You don't have to do this alone. You're not alone, Parks. There are other women who have been in your shoes, or who are there right now. You can help each other." He moved his hands down to her shoulders to ground her, to make her stay connected to reality. "There's counseling, support groups. There are people who can help you."

She broke, falling into him while sobs wracked her body, chanting the same four words over and over again: "I can't do it."

"You can. You're the strongest person I've ever met. You always said that you could never stand up to your mom, but you did. You can do this, too. I know you can."

She cried until she couldn't anymore, and even then her chest still heaved with silent sobs. It took a long time for her to calm down enough to speak.

"I kind of hate you."

The words hurt, even though he expected them. "I know."

"I hate you for getting me pregnant. I hate you for not realizing what was wrong. I hate you for leaving," she listed. "I hate you for replacing me with Ava Tucker."

"What?" He should have said more, but he didn't know what. He was too surprised.

"We always used to escape together, whenever things got to be too much. Now you escape with her. I know we can't go back, but… I just didn't think I'd be so easy to replace."

"I could never replace you Parks. It's not possible. Ava's just a friend. She's been through some bad stuff, too, so she's helping me figure out how to deal with this." Their problems were completely different, but it was good to be with someone who understood what it was like to be fucked up and what it took to get healthy again. "She's the one who suggested counseling. She said it helped her a lot and it might help me, too."

Kelly was trying to wipe her face dry, so he dug into his pocket for a handkerchief to give her. She always made fun of him for carrying handkerchiefs, called him an old man. She dabbed at her eyes and asked, "You're going to counseling? You didn't mean just for me?"

"I need help, too, Parks. I'm not telling you to go to counseling because I think you're weak or you're crazy, I'm telling you because something really, really bad happened to us, and neither of us can deal with it alone. We need help to move past this."

She looked away from him again, out over the cityscape. "You know, sometimes I think this was all a nightmare, and when I wake up it will still be September, and you'll still be in Denver with me. I wish it was a dream."

He let out a long sigh, following her gaze off to the horizon. "Me too."

* * *

><p>AN: Some of you know that I'm a research maniac, and I researched this, too. Some women who have had abortions describe these "symptoms" (that word sucks for describing what actually happens), and it has nothing to do with whether or not they chose to have it. What happens to Kelly in this story is taken from the real lives of women who were brave enough to share their experiences.


	63. Chapter 63

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

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><p>Since Payson was competing today, she couldn't go to the hospital for her tests, but she still needed to have them done. The solution they worked out was for a lab tech to come on site and draw blood, and then take it back to the hospital for it to be examined. The downside to this was that without Payson being at the hospital, the bloodwork wouldn't be considered a priority. The doctor would call with the results when they came back, but it wouldn't be for hours, maybe as late as the afternoon. She would be going into the finals blind.<p>

She looked fine, though. She hadn't gone downhill at all since Saturday, and that was the longest she'd lasted since she first got sick. It was like lifting a giant weight off Sasha's chest. Every day that she stayed well was a day that he breathed a little bit easier.

Practice was small. It was the last day of competition, so the only people still training were Lauren, Kelly, Payson, Steven, and Austin. Kaylie ran through both her beam and floor routines once, just to be on the safe side, but there was no reason to think that she would be needed as an alternate. The other three girls were looking strong. Kelly, thankfully, was showing no signs of the wobbles she was plagued with over the past few days.

The other team members were there, but they weren't working out. Ostensibly they were there for moral support, but Sasha wasn't sure how sitting on a mat playing poker constituted support. Marty was mostly absent from the practice as well, and Sasha wasn't sure why. The assistant coach had been on and off the phone all morning, but he wouldn't answer any questions about who he was calling.

They were just breaking for lunch when Marty called over Kelly and handed her the phone. She looked just as confused as Sasha felt, but when she put the phone to her ear her face split into the first real smile he'd seen her wear for days. Marty left her alone and wandered over to the rest of the group.

"Who is that?" Sasha asked. Curiosity was eating him alive.

Marty smirked. He was proud of whatever he just made happen. "Her grandmother," he answered.

Payson joined the conversation. "Her grandmother? As in the grandmother who lives in a fishing village in the Philippines?"

"That's the one."

Marty wanted them to dig for information, and Sasha didn't want to give him that satisfaction, but Payson didn't have any reservations on that score and asked, "How did you get her on the phone? And why?"

"It wasn't easy, but if you spend enough time you can contact anybody," he said. "Kelly has the number, but I wanted it to be a surprise, so I just used the information I had. I knew what her name was and what town she lived in, so that was enough to find her."

"Okay, but you didn't answer why," Sasha said, giving into Marty's game.

His smirk wavered a bit as he answered the question. "You've seen what she's been like these past few days. Nicky thought this might help her. She doesn't have any family here, so this is the next best thing."

When people thought about the Olympics, they always thought about happiness and dreams fulfilled, but nobody stopped to consider how many of those athletes were alone. Some families, like the Keelers, were incredibly supportive, and some weren't. Sasha had been alone in Sydney. Austin was alone in Beijing. Kelly was alone here, and Nicky might as well be. His dad was there, but it was all for show. He came because it would reflect poorly on him if he didn't, not because he wanted to support Nicky. The road to the Olympics was hard, and not all parents wanted to travel it with their children.

Payson was staring at her friend, watching the way her face lit up. The only time Sasha had ever seen that look on Kelly was when she was performing her floor routine.

She took her eyes off of Kelly and looked at Marty again. "Thanks, Marty. Thank you for doing this for her. I think Nicky was right. This will help."

Lauren sidled up next to them, inserting herself into their conversation. She was never shy about making sure that she was included.

"Sooo, what are we talking about?" She followed their gaze and added, "And, whoa, what made Kelly so happy? I haven't seen her like that in ages."

"Come on," Payson said, "I'll explain it to you while we get our lunch. I needed to talk to you anyway."

The next few hours were uneventful, unless you counted Emily and Kaylie having a chalk fight as eventful, and before he knew it he was standing outside the women's locker room, waiting for Payson and Lauren to come out for the line up. He couldn't believe that it was the last day of competition. It seemed like yesterday he was walking into a chaotic Rock for the first time and telling them that they needed him. God, he'd been an egotistical jerk back then.

When the eight beam finalists spilled out the door, he caught sight of his girls and chuckled.

"What?" Lauren asked. "Do we have toilet paper stuck to our butts or something?"

The joke just made him laugh outright. "No, it's nothing. You look lovely."

They did look lovely, and they looked like _themselves_. That was why he laughed. The girls had put a lot of thought into their leos, and they had done a good job, because how they were dressed was a perfect representation of their personalities. Lauren's silver and green leotard was flashy and loud, drawing everybody's immediate attention. She looked like a superhero, which fit her as a power gymnast. Payson, on the other hand, was wearing a deep purple leo—her signature color, Kelly said—that epitomized her subtle grace and beauty. It was almost sensual, just like her beam routine.

"Okay, let's go. Line up." This was the first time that Payson wasn't leading the line. Lauren qualified in first, so she was at the front, while Payson stood a few spots back in fourth. It was kind of mind blowing that she competed the worst she'd done in ages and still managed to take fourth place.

When Austin exited the arena, for the first time without a medal around his neck, Payson slipped out of her place in line to kiss him. Despite his loss on the parallel bars, they were laughing while one of the event coordinators tried to scold them into separating. Sasha was pretty sure it was a game at this point. Every time they passed in the tunnel they tried to steal as many kisses as possible before this lady badgered them in to compliance. If she didn't wear her disapproval so openly they would probably settle for a quick congratulatory kiss and move on. The poor woman probably hated Payson by now.

They followed the now familiar process of introductions and warm ups, and then it was a waiting game until Payson was up. She stood beside him while they watched the first qualifier perform and said, "I don't know why, but I've been thinking about the first day you came to the Rock."

"That's funny, I've been thinking about it too." He wasn't surprised. They were usually on the same wavelength. "I was such an arse back then."

She laughed. A real, full out laugh, drawing the attention of the other athletes. "You really were. But I thought you were a gymnastics god, so I didn't even notice. I was so excited to have the great Sasha Belov as my coach."

It was his turn to laugh. "Well, that didn't last long, did it? I was there for less than a day before you started arguing with me."

"And never stopped." She gave him a playful nudge with her shoulder. "We're both too stubborn for our own good. I acted like such a child sometimes."

"Those were usually the times you won, though. You'd pout and stomp your foot, and it was so damn funny that I'd end up giving in." There were few things in this world that were more adorable than Payson stomping her foot like a three year old. It was impossible to stay angry in the face of such cuteness.

"I do not pout!"

"Yes you do. You're doing it right now." She was, in fact, pouting, and rather than admit she was right she shoved him sideways and went away to visualize. He stood behind laughing, drawing strange looks from everybody around him. God, he loved that girl.

o-O-o

"Good afternoon, everybody, and welcome back to the final day of gymnastics competition at the 2012 London Olympic Games, and if you're just joining us, you've picked a good time to tune in. I'm Al Trautwig, with Olympic Gold medalist Tim Daggett and Elfie Schlegel. We are halfway through the event finals on balance beam, and Payson Keeler, three time Olympic gold medalist, is about to compete. She is one of only eight girls who qualified to compete for a medal on this apparatus. Tim, what are her chances?"

"Well, Al, I have always said that if Payson missed the gold on any apparatus, it would be the balance beam. I was wrong, of course, because there was that surprising upset on vault this past Sunday, but this is still the event to watch. There are two Americans, Payson Keeler and Lauren Tanner, fighting it out for the beam Championship, and a lot of people think that Lauren will come out on top. She already has one gold medal under her belt, and she's looking to add another to her collection tonight."

"We'll talk more about Lauren Tanner later, but right now, tell me about what happened on vault, Elfie."

"Well, Payson was widely expected to take the gold medal on that apparatus, but she left the vault event finals on Sunday with a silver medal instead. Russia's top gymnast, Ivanka Kirilenko, who prefers to just go by Ivanka, surprised the world by landing what's called a Produnova. That's a handspring onto the vault with two forward saltos, and it's the hardest vault in the gymnastics code of points. It has a possible score of 17.1, as compared to Payson's harder vault which is out of a 16.5. That extra start value made the difference between gold and silver for the Russian bombshell."

"Now here she is, up on the beam with an aerial walkover mount. Very pretty. But back to the vault finals, Ivanka won that gold medal by the smallest of margins. She beat Payson by less than four hundredths of a point, even though she had nearly seven _tenths_ advantage in average starting value. If Payson hadn't been sick, she had a harder vault that would easily have won her the gold."

"Payson has struggled with her health throughout these Games, Tim, but her illness hasn't had any lasting impact other than on vault. She is looking very well today. Better, in fact, than I've seen her look since she arrived in London. Look how steady she is going into this move. What is that?"

"It's called a flic flac full to a handstand, so that's a flip backwards with a full twist, and then stopping her momentum halfway through the flip. This move will be named after her in the next code of points, but, honestly, I'm not sure what she and coach Sasha Belov were thinking when they put this in her routine. This move replaces a Rufolva, which we'll see an example of with Genghi Cho in just a few minutes, but it puts her in a time crunch. A Rufolva goes straight down to the beam and is very quick, but this new move takes up a lot more of her allowed ninety seconds. She has to hold that handstand for at least two seconds, and then lower herself down into a split, which requires both time and control. She's had to change up a few non-essential moves to make this fit, and she can't afford even the smallest of pauses. I'm not sure that a one tenth increase in difficulty is worth that kind of extra pressure."

"I've wondered that same thing myself, Elfie, but she and Coach Belov are known for taking chances. Maybe they know something that we don't."

"Now here comes her dismount, a double front handspring in the stretched position, one of the hardest dismounts in the code of points, tied with Lauren Tanner's double Arabian dismount. She didn't do this dismount on the first night of competition, because she just didn't have enough energy to get the height that she needed, but she hasn't had a problem since. And… no problem tonight! That was beautiful. One of the best dismounts I've ever seen, and one of the best beam routines. Only Lauren Tanner could do it better!"

"Tim, that was fantastic, and I can't imagine anyone beating it. Do you really think that Lauren still has a shot at the gold?"

"I do, Al. It will be tough, but I believe she's capable. Even Payson will admit that Lauren is the best beamer in the world."

"You can see Payson down on the floor right now, laughing with Lauren and her coach while she waits for her scores. She's not nervous at all. She's either very confident with her performance or she's just not concerned with the results."

"I think it's the later, Elfie. She's said before that after the All Around, any more medals that she wins will just be icing on the cake. In fact, I think she's rooting for her teammate to beat her. They are incredibly supportive of each other."

"And here's her score, a 16.7, tying the record she set during the All Around competition. Nobody has ever scored that high on the beam before, including Lauren Tanner. Does that change your opinion, Tim?"

"Not at all. I never said that it would be easy or that it would be a sure thing, but I maintain that Lauren has the ability to win this competition. She's capable of those kinds of scores."

"Well, I guess we'll find out in a few minutes. But right now we have Genghi Cho stepping up to the beam…"

o-O-o

"And we're back live at the North Greenwich Arena in London, England, just in time for the final competitor in the beam event finals. Lauren Tanner was first coming into this competition, but Payson Keeler is currently sitting in first place with a huge score of 16.7. We're all asking ourselves the same question: Can Lauren beat her or will Payson walk out with her fourth gold medal."

"You know, Al, it all depends on the judges scoring at this point, and we've had some strange things happen here this past week. During the team finals, Lauren's score on beam was actually booed, which I've never seen happen before, because she was underscored so badly. The fans here were outraged on her behalf. And then again yesterday there were some questions regarding the scoring. Payson Keeler won gold on the uneven bars with a 17.2, but experts are saying that she deserved a lot higher. In both of those situations, the discrepancies had no impact on the medal standings, but if Lauren gets underscored again today it could mean the loss of a gold medal."

"You know, Elfie, if that happened I think there would be an inquisition, and I think it would be led by Payson. She wants her friend to succeed. I don't think she would ever accept a medal that she didn't win fairly."

"Well, let's watch and see what happens. Here's Lauren Tanner up on beam…"

"She starts this routine with a full twisting layout up onto the beam, which is the hardest mount in the world right now, and I still don't know where she gets the height to it. I know that when I was competing, I never could have done that skill. I couldn't have done anything close."

"Lauren is known for her incredibly difficult skills, but I think she's known just as well for her 'sizzle,' as she calls it. She can really engage a crowd."

"Here's one of those incredibly difficult skills now, Al. She does a full turning pike jump and then goes _straight_ into a standing layout, without even the slightest hesitation. They're calling that combination a Tanner. I'm sure that there will be many gymnasts who repeat that move in the coming years, but I don't think any of them will be able to do it as well as Lauren does."

"She's definitely in a league of her own. Payson may be neck and neck with her as far as scores go, but their routines are so different that they might as well be competing in different events. Lauren is all about power, with these gigantic tumbles, and Payson is about grace with mind blowing dance elements. They train with the same coach, but their styles are nothing alike."

"We're coming up on the dismount now, a double Arabian, made famous by 2004 All Around champ Carly Patterson. The only other dismount being done today that equals it in difficulty is Payson's double front stretched. There's the ten second warning, aaannndddd… perfect! Yes! I think she's done it. I think Lauren Tanner just won a gold medal!"

"Wow, Tim, I don't even think Lauren is as excited about that routine as you are. Did you place money on this event?"

"In fact, Al, I did. I bet my wife twenty dollars that Lauren would be the new balance beam Champion. Because she is Just. That. Good."

"Well, don't crow too loud, Tim. We don't know who the winner is yet, and it's going to be close either way. Down on the competition floor Payson and Lauren are holding hands, waiting for the scores to post."

"They're coming up now, and, oh my God, the new Olympic Champion on the balance beam is—"

* * *

><p>AN: *evil laugh* I made this chapter long just so I could leave ya'll on that cliff hanger. It wouldn't be any fun to just tell you upfront, would it? :) Who do you think won?

(I have the urge to put this in here… "Har har har, mine is an evil laugh… Now die!")


	64. Chapter 64

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

A/N: Obviously I have no concept of my schedule any more. I have no clue when I was supposed to post this. Ya'll are going to have to start reminding me when I'm supposed to put up the next chapter.

To make up for the lateness, this chapter is super long.

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><p>Payson won. <em>Payson won!<em>

Lauren squealed and tackled her friend. "You won! We're silver and gold, just like we always planned!"

Payson was hugging her back, moving along while Lauren hopped up and down, but her eyes were glued to the scoreboard. She was in shock.

"Lo—" her voice was raspy and strangled "—you should have won. You were better than me."

"Well, duh, that's why I got a higher execution score." She scored a 9.45 over Payson's 9.4. "But you had the higher DOD. That's the way it works."

Her friend turned to her with haunted eyes. "You should have won, Lo. If I hadn't changed that stupid Rufolva you would have. You deserve the gold."

"Oh my God, you're such an idiot. You're an idiot that I love, but still an idiot." Payson would go to her grave defending Ivanka's win on vault, but she wouldn't accept her own win on beam. She was always quick to jump to someone else's defense. "Payson, you won. There was nothing unfair about the results. You just came out on top this time. Be happy."

"She's right," Sasha said, laying a hand on both their shoulders. "I kept track of the deductions. They didn't underscore her or overscore you. You were virtually equivalent. It could have deviated by as much as five hundredths in either direction for both of you and still be fair, and it just happened that the numbers worked in your favor this time. If you put up another six judges it might have been Lauren, or another six and it might have been a tie. It doesn't matter who got the medal. You're both champions here."

Payson considered his words. "Okay, then how about a deal. I'll take the title, since they won't let me give that away anyway, and you take the medal. What do you think?"

"Are you serious? You really want me to take your medal?"

"It's not my medal, it's our medal. You heard Sasha, it was a toss up. I'll take the silver." She was crazy. But crazy in a good way. Nobody but Payson Keeler would give away a gold medal, and this wasn't even the first time. She gave her team gold to Andy.

"Okay, deal," Lauren said, sharing a token handshake with her teammate. "We'll switch medals."

Payson had been up on that podium by herself four times now, but it was Lauren's first. She found that she missed having her teammates with her, and she was really glad that Payson was standing next to her. As she sang along to the Star Spangled Banner, she couldn't stop the tears from coming. She'd worked for eighteen years for this moment and it was finally happening. But it was even better than she had imagined, because it wasn't the end.

She always thought that her life would seem meaningless after the Olympics, not having that dream to chase anymore, and if the events of the last year hadn't happened that's how it would be. But now she had plans, and a life to look forward to. She had a goal: Stanford, and then maybe law school. She had her friends, and she knew they wouldn't disappear from her life when they were done with all their publicity work. She had a woman who would be a mother to her and not run away when things got tough, and a girl who would be her sister. Lauren and Emily knew it would happen, even if their parents didn't yet, and she surprised herself by being excited about the prospect of having the Kmetkos as part of her family. And she maybe had a man. It was new and exciting and scary, but she saw Jake Williams in the stands and knew he was there for her. He was a keeper.

She cried again when they placed the medal around her neck, and laughed when Payson took the gold off of her own neck and swapped it for the silver. Lauren was thrilled when she won the silver and honored when Payson gave her the gold, but she was downright amused when her friend insisted that they trade places on the podium. The event coordinators were pissed, but that seemed to be Pay's specialty. She was going to give that one lady an aneurism before the day was over.

And as if to prove Lauren's unspoken point, Payson jumped into Austin's arms when they exited the arena, wrapping her legs around his waist and kissing him soundly. She was definitely doing it to screw with that woman, because this was going far even for Payson, who had no qualms about PDA.

"Okay, come on, Lolita, your boyfriend has to compete now. You can maul him later."

o-O-o

Sasha couldn't believe that he was standing on the floor about to coach Payson and Kelly through the last event of the Olympics. An event Payson would win hands down.

Payson was a lock for first, but the other medals were up in the air. The thought coming out of qualifications was that Payson would take gold, and Kelly and Genghi Cho would take the other medals. The only question was which order they would rank in. After Elisabeta Patrescu's performance in the team finals, it was anybody's game. Elisabeta had the potential to beat both Genghi and Kelly, depending on what the other two brought to the table. If Kelly performed like she did over the weekend, after the debacle of a confrontation with Nicky Russo, she wouldn't medal. But Sasha was fairly certain that she wouldn't choke this time. Speaking with Nicky the night before helped her, and then the phone call with her grandmother that morning made her happy in a way that he almost never saw on her. He had a bet on with the Romanian coach, an old mate of his from his pre-Amelia days, about who would take the silver, and he was confident in his choice. Kelly would win.

If all went according to plan, then the only event that the U.S. wouldn't take home a medal for would be the parallel bars. It was the men's team's major weakness, and even though they had two men qualify, neither were on the level needed to medal. Steven landed in seventh place and Austin landed in fifth. It stung a little bit that he didn't do the ungraded routine they worked so hard on, because it would have won gold, but Sasha understood why Payson didn't want the father of her child competing something so dangerous. Austin was more than content to make up for the loss with a gold on high bar, and Sasha would have to be content with that, too. Technically he wasn't Austin's coach anymore, so the wins and losses had nothing to do with him, but he choreographed those routines and he was emotionally attached.

Time seemed to be on fastforward. If anyone asked, he wouldn't be able to describe a single element in the first three routines. When Elisabeta competed in the fourth slot, he had a vague impression that it was excellent, but he didn't notice any specifics. The score was huge, another 15.65, identical to her team finals score. Definitely bronze worthy. Maybe silver worthy.

He didn't notice anything else until Genghi was up, and even then the only thing he noticed was her rank. He didn't have a clue what her score was, because he didn't pay enough attention, but she was in second place behind Elisabeta. It all depended on Kelly.

He forced himself out of his daze when Kelly was up, because it was important for him to watch her. She might be Marty's gymnast, but he was the National Team coach, so she was his in a way, too. She was standing close with Payson, holding hands and whispering together. Sasha thought that Payson was probably giving her a pep talk, and it would mean more coming from her teammate than it would from either coach.

She saluted and settled into her opening pose, and he couldn't help but notice that she looked like some kind of exotic bird with her devil horn buns, the flamboyant yellow streaks on her black leo, and her arms lifted beside her while she waited for her music. The overall effect was very folksy, which was appropriate considering that she was competing to a folk song. She was smiling.

He was going to pay attention to this routine and take note of all the possible deductions so that he could tabulate her score. At least, that was the plan, but as Kelly launched into her first tumbling pass something happened that derailed that plan completely: he got a text message.

It was such a bizarre occurrence that he had to check it. He was at the _Olympics_, for God's sake, who would be texting him? He slipped his cell phone out of his pocket, feeling grateful that nobody had thought to ban the use of cells on the floor, and opened up the message. It was from Kim, and it was a single line of text.

_Dr called. NO CHANGE in blood levels!_

"Oh my God." He didn't realize he'd said the words out loud until Payson looked at him and tilted her head in question. Rather than answer, he handed her the phone.

"Oh my God," she echoed. Then the truth caught up to her and she said again, "Oh my God! Sasha, oh my God! Do you realize what this means?"

He did. The Aranesp was working. Her body was making blood again to compensate for the cells that died too fast. She was going to be okay. _She was going to be okay._

He picked her up and hugged her, dropping kiss after kiss to the top of her head while tears streamed down her face, and a few fell from his eyes as well. It was the most profound relief he'd ever felt. _She was going to be okay._

She stepped out of the hug to search the crowd, her eyes flying to the U.S. athletes' section where Austin would be. She caught his attention away from Kelly and had one of their baffling lip reading conversations where they managed to understand one from across the stadium. Austin had no outlet for his relief other than to hug his sister, a poor substitute for Payson but one that would work nonetheless. Higher in the stands, the Keelers were participating in the same ritual. It was like they'd all just been released from a prison of fear. _She was going to be okay._

Kelly's music ended and he had no idea how she'd done, but judging by the smile on her face it had been spectacular. He hoped that she wasn't going to give up gymnastics completely after this, because that routine was healing for her. It was a physical embodiment of being loved, and that was what she needed more than anything else right now.

Payson ran to meet her on the stairs, grasping both of Kelly's elbows and sharing the news. Kelly practically tackled her with a hug and the two girls stood together on the steps, rocking back and forth as they clung to one another. They were both smiling, and it was the best sight he'd seen in ages.

o-O-o

"Well, I'll admit it, Elfie. I have no idea what's happening down on the floor."

"I don't either, Al. Kelly Parker just had the floor routine of her life, one that will probably cinch the silver for her, but I don't think what's going on between her and Payson right now has anything to do with that. I don't know what it is, but something just happened to make Payson Keeler very happy, and the two girls appear to be celebrating together."

"For those of you at home, let me explain what you just missed. Just after Kelly's floor routine started, Payson Keeler and her coach, Sasha Belov, both went wild. They were hugging and crying, and I'm hearing from the people down on floor that they were both yelling the phrase 'Oh my God.' Payson communicated with her boyfriend Austin Tucker, and now the same thing is going on in the athlete's section. Something happened to get the American team very excited."

"You know, it's good to see both Kelly and Payson looking so happy. Kelly was struggling last time she competed and had what is fast becoming an infamous break down after she sat down one of her vaults, but she has certainly been smiling today, and I haven't seen Payson Keeler look this genuinely happy since before Nationals."

"Payson hasn't confirmed any details about her illness, Elfie, but many people are speculating that she was already sick during that competition two months ago, so I'm hoping that maybe this sudden—well, the return of the normal Payson Keeler, if I can say that, might mean good news on that front. I know that we all want to see her healthy again."

"Well, whatever has them so happy, here's something to add to it. Kelly's scores just came up and she's in first place, ahead of Elisabeta Patrescu of Romania. She scored a 15.725, nearly a tenth of a point higher than Elisabeta, and let me tell you, she deserved it. That was one of the best floor routines I've seen performed. She really brought it to life."

"Here is something that I've never said before, and will probably never say again. Kelly Parker, the current leader with one athlete still to go, has no idea that she's in first. She's not even looking at the scoreboard, and it looks like Sasha Belov is approaching the girls to remind them that Payson still has to compete. I've never seen a gymnast forget to take her place on the apparatus before. Have you, Tim?"

"Definitely not, Al, and certainly not at the Olympics. But we've said it before, these girls on the American team just aren't like other girls. I've learned to expect the unexpected."

"Well this is it, the last gymnastics performance in the 2012 London Olympics, and it is fittingly Payson Keeler who has that honor. Elfie, you might want to get out your Kleenex, because the last few times we've watched this routine you cried."

"I already have them right here, Al."

. . .

. . .

"I…. I don't know what to say. I don't know if there are words to describe that."

"Ladies and gentlemen, this is the first time that I've ever seen Tim Daggett at a loss for words. Elfie, are you able to speak yet?"

"I don't know what to say, either, Al. That was beautiful, and such a change from what we saw her compete here during the qualifying round. When she first competed this last Sunday, it held such sorrow and such pain that she had the entire arena, including myself, in tears. But today… it was so uplifting! I have never seen anyone convey that kind of joy through a floor routine."

"I don't know what's come over Payson Keeler, but I have to say, I'm glad to see this change. One of the things that makes Payson a crowd favorite is how much she obviously enjoys the sport, and as I said earlier, that has just been missing these past few months. _This_ is the Payson Keeler that the world fell in love with."

"I think that it is safe to say that she is the new Olympic Champion on floor, which makes that five gold medals, which I believe is a record. Until now, the most gold medals that any female gymnast has won during a single Olympics was four."

"I think you're right about her being the new champion, Elfie, but we need the scores to make it official and we're still waiting on those. While we're waiting, Al, tell us the medal count."

"Well, let me take a look at the paper here… we added these up earlier, and if we assume a gold for Payon of floor, then that put the U.S. with five gold medals and five silvers, Russia with a gold and two bronzes, Romania with a silver and a bronze, and China with two bronzes. I don't think there has ever been a single team that dominated at the Olympics the way that Team USA has here in London."

"And don't forget, that's just the women. The American men are leaving with six golds, two silvers, and a bronze. Austin Tucker and Nicky Russo made sure that the women weren't the only ones with success in these Games."

"Well here are the scores back for Payson, and she unsurprisingly took the gold. A 16.425! Tim, you said during qualifying that Payson's 16.4 was the closest we would ever get to seeing a perfect score in the new code of points. It looks like you'll have to eat your words."

"I'm happy to do it, Elfie. I was wrong and I'm glad I was! Payson Keeler has stolen the show here at the London Olympics!"

o-O-o

The rest of the day was a whirlwind. First there was the press conference, nearly all of which centered around Payson. People of course asked her about their reaction to her test results just before floor, and she hedged around the truth by saying, "I got some good news that I was very excited about." People could interpret that however they liked, and most of them would probably even get it right.

Kelly didn't hedge around at all. When asked if she would comment on her break down during the vault finals, she answered with a succinct "no," and when they asked about the reason for her happier countenance today she said, "I talked to my grandmother this morning." The truth at its bare minimum.

After the press conference, Payson and Austin managed to sneak off to the hospital for an ultrasound, to make sure that Alex made it all the way through the Olympics safely. They had to bribe multiple people to set up an appointment after normal business hours, but large sums of money can usually get people to work a little late, and it was money well spent. When they met the rest of the group at the OXO Tower afterward, Payson was glowing. The first thing she did upon entering the room was to hug Sasha and whisper, "Everything is perfect with Alex. He's safe."

They were at the OXO Tower for the final reception for the USA Gymnastics. MJ coordinated with the NGO to plan it, and it was on a much smaller scale than Payson's reception after the All Around. That party had involved hundreds of guest, most of whom Payson had never met, but the OXO Restaurant and Bar were rented out for about fifty people—just the athletes, their families, the coaches, and the highest ranking officials of the NGO. It was a celebration of the end of the Olympics, at least as far as gymnastics was concerned.

They were asked to wear their medals to the event, which was fine for the majority of the athletes who had only one or two, but difficult for Nicky, Austin, and Payson. Nicky had four medals to wear, Austin had five, and Payson had six. Their necks were so weighed down that they couldn't manage to wear them any longer than the photo session. The NGO photographer wanted everybody wearing the medals they won, meaning that Andrea would give Payson back her team medal, Payson would give Austin back his, and Payson and Lauren would switch back the silver and gold medals for beam. They all flatly refused.

Sasha knew that Payson was a master at manipulating people, but it never failed to amaze him. She couldn't lie worth crap, but she drew a distinction between lying and acting, and she was a fantastic actress. When the president of the NGO asked why she and Austin were late (nosiness disguised as concerned curiosity), she said that they had to stop by the hospital and then let him make his own assumptions, which he did exactly to her plan. They didn't make the particulars of her ESA known to anyone other than Emilie Morel and the five members of the Anti-doping committee, so the official assumed that she was needed at the hospital for another round of her mystery treatment.

A few minutes later, someone offered her a glass of wine and tried to encourage her when she said no, assuming that she was only uncomfortable with the lower drinking age in Europe. She gave the man a regretful smile (how did she manage so many different smiles?) and said, "I really can't. I'm on a lot of medications right now." It was a calculated reply. Since the social standard considers it rude to ask about something as personal as medication, he had no choice but to drop the subject.

Currently, she was standing off to the side of the room with MJ, discussing God knows what. As usual, their method of communication was confrontational. When they separated, the older woman made her way over to where Sasha was speaking with Marty and said, "This is the last time, Sasha. I am never representing one of your gymnasts again. You've turned her into a female version of you."

"Don't be silly," Payson said, following her agent to the group. "I haven't slept with nearly enough people to be considered a female version of Sasha."

Sasha choked on his drink, and then glared down the chortling of his fellow coach. "Payson, that sort of thing if only funny when you do it to her," he said, pointing at MJ.

"This is exactly what I mean," MJ said. "You're both incorrigible. I mean it, Belov. Never again."

He watched his former flame walk away, not enjoying the view nearly as much as he used to. He knew exactly why he came back to her time after time, but her body no longer held the same temptation for him, nor did he hold onto the idea of eventually winning her heart as he did for years after their break up. He was over it and over her.

He turned back to the much more pleasant view of Payson. She was wearing a loose fitting dress with no waistline, and he was reminded of the conversation she had with her mom about not being able to button her clothes comfortably anymore. He supposed that she was choosing her clothes around that fact now. He nodded his head toward MJ retreating figure and asked, "What did you say to get her in such a strop?"

"I told her that you were going to the photo shoot tomorrow, just to screw with her. She flipped her lid."

"What's so bad about that?" Marty asked. "I've chaperoned a few of Kelly's, after the split with her mom."

"It's a nude photo shoot," she informed him. Her poker face was perfect.

This time it was Marty who choked on his drink. "Please tell me that's another one of your jokes," he sputtered.

"I wish it was," Sasha said. "But Payson almost never listens to me and MJ never does, so I didn't get a say in it."

"Payson, what the hell are you thinking? _Nude_ photographs?"

Payson rolled her eyes. "It's the Body Issue, Marty, not Playboy. Tons of people have done it—Serena Williams, Evan Lysacek, Alicia Sacramone, Apolo Anton Ohno. Hell, the entire 2008 Water Polo team did a cover a few years back. I have a great body. Why shouldn't I show it off?"

This was all an act, too. Sasha knew that she didn't particularly want to do the shoot, but she trusted MJ when it came to her public image (that was the _only_ time she trusted MJ) and was willing to go out on a limb here. But as far as the rest of the world was concerned, she was posing because she wanted to make a statement that strong could be sexy. That was the basis of the issue, to show that stick thin models were not necessarily the gold standard of beauty. Payson really was the perfect candidate. Not only was her body toned and muscular, it was also voluptuous. She had some serious curves in a world where curves were frowned upon, but no man ever looked at Payson and thought that her hips were too big. Usually their thoughts revolved around feeling those hips under their hands.

Marty was casting wary looks between Sasha and Payson. "You're not really going with her are you?"

"Yes, Marty. My coach is going to watch me get all bendy on the beam while I'm naked. That's not at all inappropriate, nor would my boyfriend have any problem with it. You know how much Austin loves to share," she deadpanned. It was funnier knowing what Sasha knew—the only reason that he wasn't going to be there was that it would look bad. It was best that he not go anyway. They were making a dedicated effort to minimize slip ups as long as she was with Austin, and seeing her 'get bendy on the beam' would make that harder—uh, more difficult. Harder was too much of a pun.

The conversation was put to a welcome end by the call to the dinner tables. Sasha was placed at a different table than Marty, so the other man couldn't pester him with disapproval. The downside to the arrangement was that he had to suffer through three courses with NGO diplomats. He would rather have sat with the Keelers, but their table was full with a few strays. The four family members were joined by Austin and Ava, who were family in a way, too, and Nicky, whose own father had left after a quick round of greetings during cocktails. The Tanners and Kmetkos sat together, and Kelly joined the Cruz family along with Andrea Conway and her mother. Despite the fact that the arrangements stuck him with people he couldn't stand, he was glad to see his girls situated so happily.

The families all enjoyed the reception, since they'd had very little time with their children during the competition. It was against the rules, and though Payson had a good excuse to see her family and Kevin made a blanket exception for Austin and Ava, the other gymnasts hadn't seen their parents for more than an hour or so on their day off. The athletes were having a good time, too, but as the time grew late they became anxious to leave. They would see their families again the next day, but for most of them this was their last night in the Village, and they wanted to spend it in traditional Olympic fashion—partying until they were either too drunk or too tired to continue.

They changed clothes again when they got back to their apartments, because apparently their dress clothes were not appropriate for a party. It hadn't been that long since Sasha was a partier himself, so he knew exactly what that meant: the men would change into something more casual, and the girls would change into something sluttier.

At thirty two he was the youngest coach there by nine years, so he was the chosen chaperone for the group. There was a reason that he chaperoned the last party, because most of them still had event finals to compete in, but he wasn't sure why he was there this time. He suspected that Kevin just wanted him to loosen up and have some fun of his own.

He did enjoy himself, thanks to Lauren's unrelenting insistence that he dance. Dancing somehow turned into a fight with rave paint, which then turned into a break dancing contest—Jake Dalton won—and ended with runs on a Slip 'n Slide. You never knew what was going to happen at a Village party; this was something he knew from his own run at the Olympics. He distinctly remembered a jello wrestling ring at one of the parties in Sydney, and somewhat less distinctly remembered jumping off the roof and into a pool. Payson didn't participate in the rowdier activities for obvious reasons, but that didn't stop her from enjoying herself. She even managed to stay up 'til twelve thirty before she headed back to her apartment leaning on Austin's shoulder. Sasha had to stay with the others, but he trusted Austin to take care of her.

It was past three a.m. when he crawled into bed, and he would be up early the next day to see off those who were leaving. He was glad that Kevin and Peter insisted that he attend the party, because he needed this last Olympic memory with the whole team. He would coach other girls and care about them just as much as he cared about Lauren, Kaylie, and Emily, but he knew that he'd never have another team that lived up to this one. They were a once in a lifetime group.

o-O-o

The men said goodbye with a solid handshake, a thump on the back, and wish for good luck in the future. It wasn't that they didn't care about each other, because they did, but they weren't separating for the rest of their lives. Jake and Steven were going back to Oklahoma, but they would see each other the next week for some group media and then again at the traditional presidential reception in October. The girls cried when they hugged the two men goodbye, but that was nothing compared to how they bid farewell to each other.

Andy and Beth had a more legitimate reason to cry, because they likely wouldn't see the other five very often. They lived in different states and wouldn't be invited to most of the media and honorary celebrations. The other girls, though, Austin didn't understand. It was Wednesday and they had an appearance together on the Tonight Show the next Tuesday, but they were carrying on like they would never meet again.

Kaylie was going home. She loved every second of her Olympic experience despite the circumstances, but there was nothing holding her in London. The best place for her to be until the publicity run started was back in Boulder with her parents and Leo, enjoying free time together in a way that they hadn't done since Kaylie started the elite circuit at fourteen.

Emily was going to Paris with Damon, with both of them having achieved their dreams just like they planned. It was a honeymoon of sorts, but without the marriage bit. They were celebrating a new stage in their life together. Emily would start UCLA in less than a month, so they could see one another on a daily basis instead of once every month or so.

Kelly had planned to stay at the Village until Closing Ceremonies, because she had nowhere else to go, but after the floor finals she decided to book a last minute flight to the Philippines. She needed to be with family, if only for a few days, so she would stay with her grandmother as long as possible and take a red eye back to New York in time for the Leno interview.

Lauren and Nicky were staying. Home was a shitty option for Nicky because, well, home was shitty for him. A couple of weeks ago he would have gone anyway and sat in a depressing hole until they had their first press obligation, but he'd become something of a surrogate Tucker, so Austin wouldn't let him leave. And Lauren… well, he wasn't really sure why Lauren was staying, but he thought it might have something to do with that wrestler who kept popping up.

The coaches were leaving, too, since their charges would be gone. That left Payson, Austin, Lauren, and Nicky with the lone chaperone of Sasha. They were all over eighteen and didn't actually need a chaperone, but the NGO didn't want any metaphorical blood on their hands if anything bad were to happen. Sasha wouldn't have left Payson, anyway.

As Sasha loaded Kaylie's last suitcase the trunk, the seven girls gathered together and exchanged tearful hugs. Then Kaylie, Andy, and Beth piled into one car and Emily and Kelly piled into the other, and they left. It was the perfect ending to a movie, except that in a movie they would be heading straight to the airport to part ways. In real life, only Kelly and Emily were doing that. The rest were going to the Dorchester to pick up every their families. It was rather anticlimactic.

Austin wasn't sure what he expected to happen once everybody was gone, but it wasn't for Lauren and Payson to run off together. Literally. Lauren said something about being late and Payson threw the worst explanation ever over her shoulder, "We have to go do something. I'll see you in a couple of hours."

"Uh… what just happened?" Nicky asked.

"I have no idea."

Sasha, looking a bit shell shocked, asked, "Is it too early for a drink?"

It was nine in the morning. But Sasha was on the right track; if they were going to deal with Payson and Lauren alone together for the next five days, they needed alcohol. "Nope. Not at all. You in, Nicky?"

"Uh, actually, I have plans. Since you're supposed to be at the shoot with Payson all day, Ava and I thought we'd go sightseeing, do all the touristy London stuff."

"Oh. Yeah, uh, no problem. Have fun. A's never been to London before, so I'm glad you're doing this." If he didn't know for a fact that Nicky was still in love with Kelly, Austin would think that he had something going on with Ava. The two had been inseparable since that first night at Café de Paris. They were turning into the next Sasha and Payson, with Ava playing the role of Sasha and Nicky playing the role of Payson.

"Ok, well, I'm gonna go. I'm supposed to meet her at the hotel whenever I'm done with, you know, all of that." He waved his hand in the general direction of the road, and they understood that he was talking about the group goodbyes.

Nicky left. Austin looked at Sasha and said, "I guess it's just you and me for that drink, then. If you're still up for it." Things were better between the two of them, but he wasn't sure if drinking together without Nicky was a good idea.

"Yeah, come on. I've got a bottle of scotch up in my apartment."

They didn't speak again until they were both sitting with tumblers in hand. "We better be careful with this," Sasha said. "Payson will be pissed if we end up drunk before it's even noon."

"I honestly think I might never get drunk again, after what happened the last time."

"Good plan," Sasha said. "You've got too much going for you now to screw it up with alcohol."

They sat in silence for a while before Austin broached the inevitable subject. "Listen, about what I said that day at the Rock… I know now that it's not true."

"It was true enough," the older man admitted. "I'd have to be a blind idiot not to be attracted to Payson, and I'd be lying if I said I'd never thought about her that way. But it's not something that I would ever act on, or something that I was even hoping. I knew you were interested, and if you'd gone about it the right way I would have supported it."

"You know, Payson said the other night that if I'd just asked her out that she would have said yes. I'm such an idiot."

Sasha laughed. "You're twenty three. We're all idiots when we're twenty three. Hell, I'm _still_ an idiot. I honestly had no idea that I was treating her differently than the other girls. I shouldn't have let that happen."

"It's kind of hard not to, though, isn't it? It's hard to be normal with a girl that's extraordinary."

Sasha snorted his agreement, and then they were quiet for a few moments until Sasha broke the silence. "I'm glad the two of you worked things out. It's good for her."

"You really do care about her, huh?" Austin saw that when he first came to Boulder, but then he got jealous and lost sight of the truth.

"I do. I know this is insane, but Payson is pretty much the center of my life. I was a mess before I met her."

There was another long lag in conversation and then, "You do realize that we're being girls here, right?"

Sasha grinned in response and held up his glass. "Don't worry, the scotch makes it manly."

They both laughed and then turned the conversation to a more causal, masculine topic, namely a debate over the merits of baseball and cricket. It was back to the way things were before Austin got jealous, just two men with a lot in common and very little difference in age hanging out. Their mutual connection with Payson meant that they would have to put up with each other for the rest of their lives, so they were both making an effort to put the past behind them.

True to her word, Payson was back within a couple of hours, but she didn't come into the apartment straight away. Lauren poked her head first and said, "Oh, good, you're together. You can both see at the same time."

"See what?" Sasha asked.

"The new Payson Keeler." With that, Lauren opened the door all the way and shoved a laughing Payson into the room. It was the same old Payson—same gorgeous body, same smile, same green eyes—but new hair. Really new hair.

"Wow," both men said.

All of her beautiful long hair was gone, replaced with a boy-short crop that hung in loose waves over her head. She lifted a self conscious hand and brushed a lock out of her face, but failed to tuck it behind her ear because it didn't reach that far.

"So does wow mean it looks fantastic and you love it," she asked, "or that you can't believe I did this to myself?"

"Both," Austin answered. "You look gorgeous. But I still can't believe you did it. What made you decide to cut it off?"

She shrugged her shoulder. "I've had long hair my whole life, and cutting it wasn't an option because of gymnastics. But now that I'm not competing anymore, I wanted something new. I'm a different person than I used to be. This makes that a little more real."

"You look so grown up," Sasha said. It was true. Her long hair was beautiful, but it was at odds with the rest of her body which looked very adult. With the new haircut she could easily be mistaken for twenty five, which would help with her image when people realized she was pregnant. MJ didn't want anyone viewing Payson as a teenager, and now she didn't look remotely like one.

"See," Lauren said, giving Payson a hip bump. "I told you they would love it. You're getting a good head for fashion."

Payson bit the side of her lip. "So you really like it?"

Neither man hesitated in his answer. They both gave a resounding "Yes."

* * *

><p>AN: The Olympics are over, folks :) Payson's life is a lot less complicated now, but she still has her fair share of things to experience. Like, say, having a baby ;)

As usual, there are pics on my pinterest, screenname flowerchild3286. The leos for Payson, Lauren, and Kelly are all in the Amor Fati- Leos board, and there are pics of Payson's hair and all the girls' dresses for the reception on the Amor Fati board.

Let me know what you think!


	65. Chapter 65

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

A/N: If you're happy to see this update, then you should send a nice big thank you to zabini123 for reminding me to post!

* * *

><p>Payson was supposed to be getting ready for the photo shoot (although Austin wasn't clear on why she needed to change clothes only to go somewhere and take them off again), but what she was actually doing was standing naked in front of the full length mirror attached to the inside of the wardrobe.<p>

"Are you sure I don't look pregnant?"

"Positive. Believe me Payson, I've memorized every inch of your body, and the only things that have changed are your boobs and the color of your skin in, ahem, certain places." Payson blushed, over either the change, the fact that he'd noticed it, or that he'd mentioned it. "But since you don't make a habit of showing those body parts to strangers, I don't think anyone will know."

She spread her hand across her stomach, and for once it wasn't a loving gesture. It was self-consciousness. "If my body hasn't changed, then why don't my clothes fit anymore?"

"They do fit, Pay. You said yourself that you can still button everything up, but it's just not comfortable. Maybe you're more sensitive than you used to be, or maybe you've even gained a couple of pounds. With your body a couple of pounds wouldn't be noticeable at all."

He stood behind her and ran his hands over her body, seeking out any changes that might have occurred. It was a testament to how much the trust between them had grown that she was letting him explore her like this, in a way that was more clinical than sexual. He wasn't even looking; he had his eyes closed so that he could feel the changes without the deceptive interference of his vision.

When he was done, he opened his eyes and rested both hands at her waist. "Your hips might be a little bit wider. That would mess up the way your jeans fit, but I don't think it's a bad thing for this shoot. We want you to be curvy, remember?"

He trailed his fingers up her stomach and let his thumb stroke the underside of her breast, and this time it was sexual. Not enough to turn her on, and definitely not a prelude to anything, but just enough to help her relax and make her feel sexy again. When she sank back against his chest, he knew he'd accomplished that goal.

The underwear she chose was subtly sexy, black boyshorts with lace trim and a matching bra, but he had no idea why this was important. It wasn't like she was going to be wearing them. She tossed him a scrap of material and said, "Here, put that in your pocket so I don't have to take a bag with me."

"What is it?" 'It' was a tan rectangle of fabric with a few clear rubber straps attached to it.

"A backless bra. They want me to tumble, and I can't do that without a bra, so that's the easiest thing for them to photoshop out."

He got lost in a vision of Payson doing a two and a half twist topless, so he didn't notice her approach until she jerked the bra out of his hand and stuffed it into his pocket. "Stop imaging me tumbling naked. That's never going to happen; it would be way too uncomfortable."

"How did you know what I was thinking about?"

She kissed him rather than answering, and then slipped a dress over her head and stepped into her flip flops. "Come on, let's go. Then instead of thinking about me naked you can see it."

He was quick to follow her out the door. That was a plan that he was more than happy with.

MJ met them outside the USA Training Facility, where they would be doing the shoot. She took one look at Payson new haircut and said, "Have you ever thought about going into PR? Because for someone who supposedly hates playing media games, you're bloody brilliant at it."

"I have no desire whatsoever to be like you, MJ. Ever." Austin didn't understand MJ and Payson's relationship. He and his agent stayed out of each other's hair most of the time, as long as neither of them did anything incredibly stupid, but the two women brought out the claws whenever they were together. Aside from the fact that they were complete bitches to each other, though, they had a great working relationship. It was part of the reason that Payson was so freaking rich.

As soon as they got into the gym, the whole facility was locked up so that nobody would wander in during the photography session, but it took less than a second to realize that his idea of a closed set wasn't accurate. He assumed that it would be something along the lines of Payson, him, MJ, and the photographer, but there were a couple dozen people wandering around the gym, with a good portion of them male. Payson was going to have to strip down in front of all these people?

MJ must have told her what to expect, because the size of the crew didn't even faze her. She waltzed forward to meet the photographer without a second glance at the rest of the room.

His name was Jack, and he was flamboyantly gay. He turned her back and forth, ruffled through her hair, and felt up parts of her body with neither permission nor apology. "Oh, you are fantastic. What a body! Have you ever considered doing erotic art? No? Well, if you ever do, give me a call. With girls like these and an ass like that, I could get pictures of you in the MET." He noticed Austin standing by Payson's side. "Hello tall, dark, and handsome. Who are you and can I have your number?"

Payson spared him a response. Fighting back a smile, she said, "This is my boyfriend Austin. He's a gymnast, too, with seven Olympic golds."

Sometimes he loved how mischievous his girlfriend was, and sometimes, like today, he hated it. She was totally pimping him to her gay photographer.

"Excellent," Jack said. "Are we shooting you too?"

He was quick to kill that idea. "No. Just Payson."

"Hmm. We'll see what we can do about that." He called across the gym to his assistant, "Cheryl, get on the phone and see if we can add another gymnast to the spread. His name is Austin…"

"Tucker," Payson supplied.

"Austin Tucker. Tell Mel that he has seven Olympic gold medals, I'm sure that makes a difference."

If Payson wasn't pregnant, he would kill her right then. How did she manage to get him roped into something like this within five minutes?

"No, really, I'm not interested. I'm just here to support Payson."

MJ jumped on the bandwagon and asked, "They're a couple, so do you think we could get a few shots of them together? The Santos couple did it a few years back."

"Honey, we won't even ask. I'll just take them and then when the editors see them they'll go wild. Her light coloring with his dark, it will look gorgeous."

Despite how great it would be to have nude pictures of him and Payson together, this was _so_ not happening. "Let's not get ahead of ourselves here, guys. I'm not doing this."

"Please, babe?" Payson begged, pressing her body close to his in an effort to manipulate him. "I would be so much more comfortable if you were doing this, too. And don't you want pictures of the two of us together?"

"Yes, but no. I'm still not doing it."

MJ interfered again. "I'll call his agent. I'm sure between us all we can convince him to do it. In the meantime, you go get your hair and makeup done."

He sat with Payson while a woman poked and prodded her with makeup and hair product, and watched as she transformed from beautiful to… beautiful. There was really no point to make up with someone who was that gorgeous naturally. When that was finished, the make up artist made Payson slip out of her dress so that she could—get this—put make up on her _body_. Gymnastics was a hard sport, and Payson had bumps, bruises, and scars all over her body that had to be covered. There was also a hicky in a rather embarrassing place that he hadn't noticed before.

He'd seen Payson stretch a hundred times before, but seeing her do it in her underwear was a totally different experience. It wasn't supposed to be part of the photo shoot, but she looked so sexy doing it that the photographer grabbed his camera and took pictures of her at all different angles. He was surprised at how well Payson handled the situation. She was freaking out a couple of hours ago, but now she seemed to have no qualms about taking her clothes off in front of dozens of people. When it came down to crunch time, she could always do what was needed.

They started out on the beam, because one of the main pictures that ESPN had asked for was her doing the pose people were calling "The Payson." It turned out to be harder than anticipated. She was in a split on the beam with her body arched over her back leg and her fingertips brushing against the beam by her feet, and the problem was that her breasts were completely exposed.

"Can you rotate your torso away from me a smidge?" Jack asked. "I think I can angle it so that all you see is a silhouette, but right now your nipple is in the shot."

She followed the instructions and called back, "Austin Tucker, wipe that smirk off your face."

"You can't even see me!" he cried. He was smirking, but there was no way for her to know that.

"I don't need to see you. I know you're doing it."

The rest of the shots on beam were simpler, a few leaps with strategically placed arms, a pose or two, and then they moved on to the floor.

There were only a few non-tumbling shots that they wanted on floor, namely her opening and closing poses, and then they took a break to reset for action photos. During that time they sat her down to do a video interview. Her answers would later be intercut with footage of the shoot to promote the issue before it was released. She seemed to have no problem being in front of a camera wearing nothing but a robe.

"How did find out that you had a spot in the Body Issue, and what was your reaction?"

The questions would all be edited out, so Payson had to phrase her answers as a narrative rather than a response. "My agent came to me and said that ESPN Magazine had called about me possibly being in the Body Issue, and my immediate reaction was, 'Are you insane?' But once I got over the initial shock, I was really very flattered. It's kind of an honor to be singled out for this."

"How would you describe your body?"

"I'm not sure that there really is a simple way to describe my body. You would think, doing what I do, that I would have a very athletic build, and I do in some ways. I'm very toned, I don't have unnecessary muscle mass or body fat, but I can't undo nature. I'm curvy and I always will be."

"How do you feel about your body? Are you happy with the way you look, or do you have any insecurities?"

"There was definitely a time in my life, and not very long ago, that I was uncomfortable with the way I looked. I don't have an ideal body for a gymnast. Actually, my body is as far from ideal as you get. I'm taller than most of the other girls by several inches, I have wide hips that lower my center of gravity, and I'm about three cup sizes larger than the average gymnast. I felt like I was monster. But when I stopped trying to be like the other girls and accepted the way I am, I realized that what I thought were faults could actually be used to my advantage. I created my own style—well, I say _I_, but I couldn't have done it without Sasha—and that style won me Olympic gold."

"How do you feel about posing nude?"

"About an hour before I came here, I was freaking out. It's very intimidating, being completely naked in front of thirty or so people. And not just naked. Naked and doing gymnastics. But once I got here it really didn't bother me. I'm comfortable in my skin, I don't have a problem with nudity. Although Austin apparently does."

"Hey," he interjected. "Don't bring me into this."

She stuck her tongue out at him and continued for the camera, "We're trying to talk him into doing a shoot, too, but he's refusing. He's more than willing to watch me take my clothes off, but he won't take his off."

He couldn't believe she was doing this to him. She was forcing his hand. Now if he didn't do it he would look like a wuss.

The interviewer was flustered, but she rallied well. "Okay, Payson, this is the last question and then I think Jack will be ready for you again. What does the Body Issue represent to you?"

"I love the whole idea behind the Body Issue, because it celebrates so many different types of beauty. Most media today kind of presents the idea that if you don't look like the models in fashion magazines then you aren't beautiful, and that's not true. Beauty comes in all shapes, sizes, and colors, and that's what this is all about."

They shut off the camera and the woman shook Payson's hand. "Thanks, that was great. I think they're almost done setting up the high speed camera, so you might want to get ready for that."

He waited until the camera crew was gone before he said, "I could kill you for that."

"Yeah, but you won't. Did I change your mind?"

"Forced my hand is more like it. I have no choice after you said that on camera."

She grinned and turned toward the floor to call, "Hey Jack, he said he'd do it!"

He chose to ignore the other man's response (something about getting him out of his pants) and swung Payson around to face him again. "Hold up. I have conditions. First off, MJ is gone. Stripping down in front of strangers is bad enough, but stripping down in front of a woman I know is worse."

"There's no need to be embarrassed, babe. You don't have anything to be ashamed of." Her voice was low and sultry. She was flirting with him.

"That's condition number two. None of this. I don't want to walk around this gym with a hard on, so stop trying to turn me on."

"Spoil sport."

"And I'll do rings and nothing else. Nothing drawn out like what they're doing with you." She'd been there for hours already. He didn't want to do this for more than a half hour.

"Rings and vault," she bartered, "and then pictures with me."

"Fine, I'll do one vault. But if they don't get what they need then they're out of luck."

"Two vaults, and you can go easy. You're handspring one and a half."

"Thanks," he said, his sarcasm coming through loud and clear, "but I'll do the Melissanidis." It was the harder of his two vaults, but it was also a tucked skill and therefore not nearly as exposed.

"Deal." She leaned into him and pressed her lips against his, which was exactly what he told her not to do, but she was gone in a flash. She held up and item of clothing. "I just needed to get my bra out of your pocket."

She was walking away, but he called after her, "You couldn't have just asked?"

Watching Payson run through her floor routine wearing nothing but a scrap of flesh colored material wasn't nearly as fun as it should be, because he knew he was expected to do something very similar in just a few minutes.

They made him sit through hair and make up, too, a process that he always hated. He didn't care for photo shoots, even when he was fully clothed. Although, come to think of it, he was rarely fully clothed. Almost all of his print ads had him shirtless, but being pantsless was another issue altogether. There were parts of a man's body that just weren't meant to be put on display to anyone other than the person you were sleeping with.

Payson thought it was hilarious. She stood around with the photographer—still nude, because she was apparently over her shyness—and suggested different shots and angles. If he wasn't so freaked out, Austin would be impressed with how well the two people worked together, Jack contributing his knowledge of photography and Payson her knowledge of gymnastics.

Jumping up for the rings had its downside, namely the bouncing of parts that shouldn't be bouncing, but the other option was to have someone assist with a lift, and that was _way_ more awkward. So he swallowed his embarrassment and hauled himself up to the rings. The moves that could be done that wouldn't completely expose him were relatively few in number, so he stuck with a few simple holds. An L-cross, an inverted cross, a modified straddled support scale, a particularly creative straddled L-sit. At least while he was on the rings he had to concentrate on the moves, but when he finally dropped off he had nothing to distract him from the fact that he was buck naked in a room full of people.

They set up the high speed by the vault, and he was true to his word. He did two vaults and two only. After that they moved on to couple shots with him and Payson, which was something that he was much more comfortable with.

"Okay, Payson, let's get you sitting up here on the, what's this called?"

"The vaulting table," Payson supplied.

"You get up on the vaulting table. Now, you, gorgeous, I want you standing right in front of her, in between her legs—"

"That is my favorite place to be," he muttered, loud enough for only Payson to hear him. She thumped him on the shoulder in retaliation.

"—facing toward me. Lean back against the table and cross your arms." Austin followed the instructions and Jack continued, "Alright, Payson, you wrap your legs around his waist and cross your feet in front of his package. You're the only cover he's got, so make sure you do it right."

"Don't get an erection," she whispered in his ear, "I won't be able to cover that."

His lips slid into a cocky smirk, and the photographer exclaimed, "Perfect! Don't move a muscle, that expression is exactly right. Sweetie, you lean over his shoulder and smile."

It was cheesy, but a surprising amount of fun. It was possibly even more awkward than the solo shots had been, due to the placement of Payson's feet, but they muttered jokes back and forth and had each other laughing. There were a few more kitschy shots, and then some steamier ones that were just to satisfy the photographer's artistic eye. Those would be just for them and would never be sent to the editors for selection. Jack promised to turn the proofs over to Payson and make a few prints of the best ones for them to keep.

The last shot of the day was for the magazine, and it would just be from the waist up so they put their underwear back on. He was standing behind her with one arm wrapped around her chest and covering her breasts while the other hand was linked with hers against her hip. She'd kept her promise to stop trying to turn him on, but he was fighting a losing battle. Some of those artistic poses were really hot, and standing with her body molded into his just sent him over the edge. There was no way to control his reaction.

"Well, I guess it's always good to know that you're attracted to me," she teased.

"I didn't prove that last night?"

"Good point. But if it makes you feel any better, I'm there too. Want to find a broom closet somewhere?" She tilted her head so that they could look at each other, and for a moment he got caught up in the heat of her gaze. She was only half joking.

"I think we'd be pretty much guaranteed to get caught," he said.

"Even better."

His hips pressed closer to hers, an involuntary reaction to her sultry tone, and her eyes fluttered shut. When she opened them again, she asked Jack, "Are we done here?"

The photographer sent them a knowing look. "We are if you insist, which I'm assuming you do. I think I have all the shots I need."

"Excellent. Let's go, Austin." She walked away, back to where her clothes were draped over a chair, leaving him with nothing but his boxers to hide his arousal. They weren't doing a very good job, and Jack was unabashedly checking him out.

"Really, Pay? You're just gonna walk away and leave me like this?"

* * *

><p>AN: If any of ya'll caught onto this, yes, Payson's photographer is Jack McFarland. And to add a few notches on the long list of bizarre similarities between things I wrote in Amor Fati and what happened in the real Olympics, Kerri Walsh was pregnant when she won Gold in London, and Danell Leyva really is supposed to do the Body Issue.

As usual, there are pics up on my pinterest. There is something similar to 'The Payson' on there, and then examples Alicia Sacramone's real Body Issue shoot so that you get the idea of what the pictures are like.


	66. Chapter 66

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

A/N: Again, thanks to zabini123 for reminding me to post! Thanks for keeping me honest, hon :) Warning: awkward formatting ahead. One of the annoying things about this website is that it will undo a lot of formatting so you have to find creative ways to work around it. Mine may not be pretty or even very creative, but they get the job done.

* * *

><p>Since they were no longer competing, the gymnasts that were still in London were taking in some of the other competitions. On Wednesday, Sasha and Lauren had spent a little while watching track and field, and then volleyball in the afternoon, and the others had joined them for the diving competition in the evening. They had, of course, attended another party that night before they retired to the single apartment that they were all inhabiting. Since there were so few of them left, Sasha and Nicky moved into the spare bedroom left by Emily and Kelly, while Austin took up permanent residence in Payson's room. It was unconventional to say the least, but it worked for them.<p>

Thursday was booked for Payson, like the day before had been and the day after would be. She wouldn't get a day off until they left London on Monday, and then it was right back to work on Tuesday. So while Lauren, Nicky, Austin, and Ava headed off to the Olympic Stadium to watch more track and field, Payson would be posing for the camera.

She didn't have to be there until eleven, so she and Sasha got some time alone together in the morning. They sat curled on the couch, chatting about trivial things and taking a much needed break from all of the serious concerns in her life right now. He'd missed spending time with her. They were together all the time, of course, but it was almost always with other people around, and since they were no longer competing she was sleeping with Austin rather than Sasha. It was just a few more days, he kept telling himself, and then they would be back in their apartment in Boulder.

Sasha wasn't sure what he expected out of the Cosmo photo shoot, but it wasn't what he got. He had been to several of Payson's shoots, but this one was different. Before, the emphasis had been placed on her athleticism or her breathtaking beauty, but the Cosmopolitan spread was all about showing how sexy she was. The whole world knew she was sexy, of course, because no matter how elegant you dressed a body like hers it was still, well, a body like hers, but this was the first time that a photograph was making a point of it.

Her pink dress was so tight that they sewed her into it, like he'd heard Marilyn Monroe used to do. She looked rather like 1950's bombshell, really, with her short blonde hair and hourglass figure. Although Monroe's clothes were never quite this revealing. Payson's breasts were pushed up and her dress was cut low, and the slanted hemline was so high that at the wrong (or right, depending on how you viewed the situation) angle you could have seen her underwear, had she been wearing any. But the dress was too tight to allow for underwear underneath, so what was actually showing was a lot more… umm, private.

It was a good thing that he wasn't sleeping with Payson that night, because he knew exactly where his head would be. They were trying to reel in their attraction, but it wasn't easy, especially when he saw her looking like that. It was impossible not to fantasize. With a dress that short and nothing underneath, it would be so easy to…

He cut that thought short. Going there, even in his mind, was a bad idea.

They took a break from the photography session to reset the lights, and Payson walked to where he was sitting behind the cameras. "I think I might burst a seam in this dress if I sit down," she said, "but I'm doing it anyway."

"They can always sew you back in." He tried to ignore the way her hem slid even further up her body as she sat down. She noticed his line of sight anyway, though, because she looked down and realized how revealed she was. She blushed and crossed her legs, which exposed more of her thigh beneath the longer side of the hem, but her thighs were never covered in a leo, so it wasn't a big deal.

"I'm sorry," he said. He pulled his eyes back up, only to realize that the top of one nipple was peeking out above her dress. That stupid piece of clothing was just all too revealing.

"It's not your fault. It's this idiotic dress. There is a thin line between sexy and slutty. This is sexy on camera, slutty in real life."

"You do look amazing, though. The cover is going to be great."

"Yeah, great," she drawled. "Me half an inch away from a crotch shot right next to a headline that says something like 'Blow His Mind: Blowjob tips that will make his head explode.' It's a dream come true."

He fought back a smile. "Did you come up with that title off the top of your head?"

"Yeah. It's the kind of thing that I would expect to see on a Cosmo cover."

"Maybe you should pitch that to them. I bet they would love it."

"Oh, shut up." Lacking anything to throw at him, she punched his arm instead. "I'm going back to work now."

They did several more shots in "the dress," and then moved on to shots for the article spread, which were more casual. MJ and the stylist picked out a pair of jeans and form fitting Team USA shirt for her. Sasha was the only person who noticed Payson's grimace. She'd avoided jeans for days.

They had her recline in a chair with her All Around gold around her neck, and the other five medals draped around her, off the corner of the chair and the end of the armrest, one hanging from her fingers, a couple suspended from a lampstand behind her. Finding places to put that many medals was harder than one might think. She was more than annoyed when the switched the scene and made her wear them all. Those medals were really damn heavy.

They had lunch together from craft services while MJ held court with the photographer and interviewer. Payson was in a good mood now that she was back in her loose-fitting dress, and she laughed and joked the whole time. He hadn't seen her this high spirited since she got sick, and every laugh was like music to his ears.

Just as they were finishing their food, MJ interrupted them. She looked smug, so whatever she had to say was bound to be good for Payson's career.

"A courier just dropped this off," she said, handing a manila folder to Payson. "It's not often that I'm surprised, but this one got me. Look what hit the stands today."

Payson glanced between her agent and the folder as if that would answer her questions. Sasha elbowed her to make her open it; he was curious what had MJ smirking like that. A glossy magazine was inside, the title becoming legible as Payson slipped it out. _Sports Illustrated_. She kept pulling and revealed a picture of herself on the gold medal podium, with a huge smile on her face and holding a bouquet of flowers in the air. She'd been up there several times, but he recognized by her leotard that this picture was from the All Around finals, the most important of all the possible medals.

"I'm on the cover of Sports Illustrated."

"It would appear so," MJ responded.

"But I was on the cover last week."

"Yes you were."

"And I'm supposed to be on the cover next week." Payson was deadpanning her words, too shocked to express emotion.

MJ, on the other hand, was wearing a shit-eating grin. "Yes you are."

"Three weeks in a row. I'm on the cover of Sports Illustrated three weeks in a row. That… doesn't happen."

"I told you I was surprised. You now share that honor with Michael Jordan. He's the only other person to do it."

"Holy shit."

Sasha lost it. He cracked up. It was too funny, Payson's emotionless shock contrasted to MJ's smugness. He was roaring with laughter until both women kicked him in quick succession.

"I'm sorry," he said. "Really, I am. But you should see your faces."

Payson kicked him again and left, calling over her shoulder, "I have an interview to do. If you can manage to get yourself under control, feel free to come watch."

It took him a couple of minutes, but he did manage to calm himself down enough to follow her. He fired off a quick text to Kevin as he went. _Looks like u need to buy Pay another frame 2 match the ones u got her 4 her birthday._

o-O-o

**The Cosmo Quiz**

Name: Payson Keeler

Nickname: Pay

.

The accomplishment I'm most proud of is:

**a) Returning to gymnastics after my injury**

**b) Winning a Teen Choice Award** _–I'm so honored!_

**c) Winning five Olympic Gold Medals**

d) Being named one of Maxim's 100 sexiest women of the year

e) Other:

.

My favorite way to start the day is: _A couple of hours of cardio_

.

My favorite body part is:

a) My boobs

b) My hips

**c) My abs** –_My core control allows me to do all of my tricks!_

d) My legs

e) Other:

.

The three words that best describe me are: _determined_, _strong_, and _loyal._

.

If I weren't a gymnast, I would be: _Who knows? There are so many options that I couldn't even guess!_

.

I feel sexiest in:

a) A slinky dress

b) Jeans and a t-shirt

c) High heels

d) Nothing –_I think this is Austin's favorite ;)_

**e) Other**: _A leotard_

.

The weirdest rumor I've ever heard about myself was: _that I was dating Michael Phelps._

.

The best gift I've ever been given was: _crystal turtles from Austin._

.

My celebrity crush is: _Austin Tucker ;)_

.

The TV show I'm totally addicted to is: _America's Got Talent_

.

The most important person in my life is: _Mom, Dad, Becca, Austin, Ava, Sasha, Lauren, Emily, Kaylie, Kelly_

.

I think my body is:

a) Just right.

b) Maybe not perfect, but it's real.

c) Could stand to gain/loose a few pounds.

**d) Other**: _Perfect for me._

.

If I could trade lives with another woman for a day, it would be: _Anybody who isn't famous. It would be nice to take a break from this for a day._

.

I am most insecure about my _hands and feet_, because _they are very scarred from gymnastics._

.

The last time I cried was _yesterday morning_, because _I said goodbye to my friends when they left London_.

.

In a relationship, I usually:

a) Wear the pants.

b) Am the more emotional one.

c) Can't get enough PDA.

d) Make all the plans.

e) Overanalyze everything.

**f) Other**: _Go with the flow. Relationships are constantly changing._

.

I couldn't date someone who didn't love: _my passion for gymnastics._

.

The best advice I've ever been given is: _Keep showing up. No matter how hard something is, you can get through it if you just keep trying._

o-O-o

THE MIDAS TOUCH: AMERICA'S GOLDEN GIRL

BY SANDRA JACOBS

When the name Payson Keeler is mentioned, two different images come to mind. The first is the fierce and beautiful gymnast who sweeps her way onto gold medal podiums wearing nothing but a leotard and a smile. The second is the sexy woman who struts down red carpets in some of the biggest names in fashion, outshining the stars around her. It is almost impossible to believe that a woman living such an exciting life could be down to earth, but Payson is.

Tucked away in the corner of a photography studio, all of Payson's glitz and glamour are gone. Her newly shorn hair is still styled from the photo shoot she just finished, but her make up is gone and she's dressed in a simple FELICITY & COCO jersey dress. Her signature Christian Louboutin heels have been replaced by flip flops, and those are tossed aside on the floor while her bare feet are tucked beneath her. Even still, she is breathtaking.

Payson is just days out from her record breaking win at the Olympics, where she took five gold medals and one silver medal, but she hasn't let the success go to her head. "I couldn't have done any of this without such a great support system," she says. "Nobody wins Olympic medals on their own. My family, my friends, and my coach, they all lifted me onto that podium."

Her coach, Sasha Belov, is with her today, and they are every bit as close as they seem on TV. It's easy to see where the rumors about them stem from—when they are together, they are almost constantly touching, and more than one kiss has been exchanged in the few hours they've spent in the studio. "We're both very physical people," Payson explains. "It's more noticeable with us, I think, because it's coming from both sides, but it's easy to tell the difference when you compare the way Sasha and I act with the way Austin and I act. You've seen what we're like together."

She's referring to her boyfriend Austin Tucker, her male counterpart in gymnastics. He's won seven Olympic gold medals himself, two at the Beijing Olympics and five in London. They are famous, or infamous, for their very public displays of affection. "We're not always this bad," she says, laughing. "The past few weeks have been very emotionally charged for us, so we've probably let things get out of hand. Don't expect the PDA to stop, but we'll try to dial it back a bit."

On paper, the two look perfect together. They are both National Champions, both World Champions, and both Olympic Champions. According to Payson, they work just as well in real life. "We get each other. You have to be a little bit crazy to do what we do, and it's nice to have someone who understands that."

Crazy is debatable, but what Payson spends her days doing is certainly dangerous. So dangerous, in fact, that she fractured her spine while competing at the National Championships a year ago. "The injury was devastating," she says, "but that was nothing compared to the feeling of losing gymnastics. People compare losing something you love to losing a limb, but it was so much worse than that. It was like losing a lung. Looking back, though, I'm glad it happened. It taught me that there is more to life than gymnastics, and that was probably the biggest lesson I'll ever learn."

It's a lesson that she seems to have learned well. Her life might revolve around gymnastics, but she's got a lot more going for her than just her ability to do death-defying tricks. She's active in the fashion industry, having connections to Christian Louboutin, Chanel, Tiffany's, and Gucci, is a spokesperson for The American Heart Association (in honor of her late grandfather), the ASPCA, and Ronald McDonald House Charities, is taking online courses at the University of Colorado with a major in Integrative Physiology, and of course has a busy social life. With so many options open to her, she doesn't know where she's going next. "Anything is possible. The plan right now is to coach, but that's not set in stone. Right now I'm just thankful to be alive, so I'm not thinking too far into the future."

It's instantly clear that she regrets the allusion to her health problems. She's been tight lipped about her illness ever since she was taken out of the Olympic Village on a stretcher during the first day of competition. The official statement is that she has "a rare blood disease" and needs "frequent transfusions." Little else is known, except that the problem is apparently genetic. It is unclear how long she has had the condition, how serious it is, or what treatment she is receiving. Her slip of tongue is the first confirmation that her life is indeed in danger, but she won't give any more details. "I'd rather not talk about it," she says. She is closing off by the second, her body language becoming defensive.

Her coach is quick to jump in and steer the conversation in another direction. "She's had a rough time," he says, "but she's got a great support system. Her teammates are always there for her."

Talking about her friends helps to relax Payson, although the casual air that accompanied the beginning of the interview is gone. "I'm incredibly lucky," she says. "The group that we have is one of a kind. It's more of a family than a team, including the men and the coaches. The medals mean nothing, not when you compare it to the kind of love that we have together."

As the interview wraps, Payson leaves a final bit of advice. "There is no secret to success. There are a lot of things that play into achieving a dream, and people know them already. If you want something, go after it with your whole heart. Be willing to work hard and take risks, because that's what it takes. Don't give up when things get tough. And most importantly, don't do it alone. No matter how far you can get by yourself, you can _always_ get farther with someone to help you."

* * *

><p>AN: Ah, the glory of fanfiction. You can be as unrealistic as you want, like making Payson the second person ever to have three SI covers in a row :)

It was torture to write that article in first person, because I'm used to writing third person. But that is how Cosmo cover interviews really are written, so I forced myself to do it. If you've never read Cosmo, now you have an idea of what it's like :) There are pics on my pinterest of the cover and her dress for the interview.


	67. Chapter 67

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

A/N: I don't know what I would do without zabini123. This one is for all the J-Lo lovers like me :)

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><p>It sucked that Payson wasn't there. Austin and Nicky totally didn't get it, and Lauren hadn't known Ava long enough to do serious girl talk with her. Payson would understand, but she was off with Sasha and MJ doing a photo shoot and interview for <em>Sports Illustrated<em>.

Lauren was psyched for her friend, because three weeks in a row on the cover of _Sports Illustrated_ was huge, but the timing was horrible. The interview was at the same time as the first several rounds of the men's freestyle wrestling competition. So much was riding on the outcome of this match, and those after it if Jake won, and Payson was the only one who would understand _why_ so much was riding on it.

Maybe she was being stupid, but she felt like if Jake didn't win gold, whatever was happening between them would end. They met at the Olympics, the place where everyone dreamed of winning gold, and she already did. If Jake lost it would put a barrier between them. She would be the woman who accomplished her dreams and he would be the man who didn't. Dating her would be like rubbing it in his face every day, even if neither of them intended it that way.

He tried to kiss her after the beam finals, but she told him that she only kissed gold medalists. It was a joke, but she regretted it now. What if he didn't win? She would still want to kiss him, of course, but would he want to kiss her after she'd said something so bitchy? He had to win. That was the only way that this could work.

After a week of playing hard to get, she lost it all when they introduced him. She didn't know what came over her, but she jumped to her feet and yelled and clapped for him like some stupid groupie. He saw her, too, and winked, which was encouraging rather than embarrassing. The only way he could have spotted her in this crowd was if he was looking for her, just like she looked for him during the beam finals.

She didn't know much about wrestling, but she'd been doing some research. Jake lucked into the 1/8 finals by drawing a low lot number, so he didn't have to compete in the qualification round, but she used those matches to study the sport in practice. It helped when Jake had his first match. She still didn't understand the vast majority of what happened, but she knew enough to cheer at the appropriate places, and she knew when he was about to win so that she could be on her feet when it happened. She was making an utter fool out of herself and didn't give a damn.

He was in the quarterfinals, one step closer to the gold he sought, and she was more nervous than ever. She didn't know how her dad did this for so many years. Being in the stands was _way _more stressful than competing. When she was competing she had control over the situation; it was all in her hands. Here, in the stands, doing nothing but waiting was going to kill her.

He lost the first period in his second match, and Lauren found herself crushing Ava's hand. She didn't even notice taking hold of it. Jake won the second, sending the match to a third period which in turn went into overtime. Jake won, but it was far too close for her liking.

She always thought that in competitions like this, each round would be harder than the one before it. It turned out that she was wrong. A lot of it was luck of the draw, and if Jake's quarterfinals partner had been in the opposite bracket, they would likely have been in the finals together. The semifinals were nothing like the quarters. It wasn't easy, not by a long shot, but Jake had no trouble winning and advancing to the finals. At this point he was guaranteed at least a silver medal. A part of her worried that he was being overconfident when he introduced himself as the future wrestling champion, but she was beginning to realize just how good he was.

The finals wouldn't be held until later that evening. She would probably have a stroke before then. In the meantime, she used her athlete's credentials and considerable flirting skills to make her way down to the floor. He was speaking to a reporter, and she waited until they were done to call his attention. She didn't want to bring this, whatever it was, into the limelight until she knew where it was going.

"Congratulations," she said, and then waited for him to face her. "I thought you were being cocky, but it looks like you're _almost_ as good as you think you are."

Her playful grin faltered and turned to desire as his eyes raked down her body. She was used to men looking at her like that, but usually when she was wearing something particularly hot. Today she wasn't dressed remotely sexy. She was wearing jeans and her Team USA jacket, but he was looking at her like she was something to eat. She felt the same pull of desire that was always there when she was around Jake Williams. She wanted him just as much as he wanted her.

She drew closer to him with no control over her body. It was like she was a fish on a line and he was reeling her in. "Is that all I get?" he asked. "I'm in the finals at the Olympics and all I get is a measly congratulations?"

"How about a congratulatory kiss?" she asked.

She leaned toward him, he leaned toward her, her eyes fluttered closed… and nothing happened. She opened her eyes and his lips were millimeters away from hers, but rather than close the distance he whispered, "But you only kiss gold medalists."

She shoved him. "I can't believe you just did that, you jerk!"

"Okay, okay, I'm sorry," he said, but showing no signs of remorse. "But the look on your face was more than enough as a congratulation. I'll make you a deal. At eight thirty tonight, after I've won gold, you meet me in this same place and _then_ you can kiss a gold medalist."

"And if you don't win gold?" The teasing was over. She needed to know what was going to happen if things didn't turn out the way they wanted.

"I will."

"But if you don't," she begged.

"Then I guess you'll have to get used to kissing a silver medalist." He said it with all of his usual swagger, like there wasn't a shot in hell of it ever happening, but it was exactly what she needed to hear.

For the first time since she met him, she completely dropped the game. She threw her arms around his neck and hugged him tight, the way she had picked up from Payson. "You were so good. I'm proud of you."

"Easy there," he said. "Don't go getting all sentimental on me." Despite his words, he didn't let her go.

The next time that she was in the ExCeL Exhibition Centre, Payson was with her. Lauren was so glad, because she really needed that support. She clutched her friend's hand so hard that both their fingers were white. She thought the repechage round would never end, and the bronze medal matches were a meaningless waste of time to Lauren. She barely noticed that the wrestler who almost beat Jake took one of the bronzes. All of her attention was focused on that one spot in the locker room where her almost-boyfriend was waiting to compete.

When he finally entered the arena, she couldn't stand and cheer. All of her muscles clenched up and she sat frozen in place. "Oh my God, I'm going to be sick."

"I don't get it," Austin said. "I know you want him to win, but you're acting like this is the end of the world."

"The end or the beginning," Payson muttered. She sounded almost as nervous as Lauren. "Depending on how this match turns out. He _has_ to win gold."

This was exactly why Lauren needed Payson with her. "Oh, thank God you understand. I really needed someone else to get how important this is. I felt like I was going nuts."

She stopped breathing when the match started. She had no doubt that Jake was the better wrestler, but the better athlete didn't always win at the Olympics. Look what happened with Kaylie and Kelly on vault, and again with Payson and Ivanka. Sometimes someone got lucky.

The first period was so close. It went back and forth, with each man gaining a point here and there and then giving one up to his opponent, so that the score stayed almost tied the whole time. There were ten seconds left in the period and neither wrestler had enough points for a technical win. Unless someone manage a takedown in that time then it would be a decision win, and right now that would go to Jake's opponent. There were nine seconds left…

Eight…

Seven…

Six…

And then the unthinkable happened. With five seconds left in the first period of the Olympic finals, Jake Williams pinned his opponent.

The time lapse between when the other man's shoulders hit the mats and the cheers started was seconds, maybe even less, but to Lauren it seemed like hours. Her whole world slowed down, her ears rang, her vision blacked out everything except the two athletes below her, and then, slowly, very slowly, she realized what this meant. She shrieked.

She leapt to her feet, pulling Payson with her and jumping up and down like an excited five year old. Payson jumped with her, but she shouted in Lauren's ear, "What does this mean?"

"He won! He's the Olympic Champion!"

"I don't understand. I thought he had to win two periods?"

"He pinned his opponent, that ends the whole thing!" she explained, hollering over the noise in the arena. "It's over. He won!"

When they gave him his medal, the new wrestling champion searched for her in the crowd. He pointed to her and then lifted his medal away from his chest. She got the message loud and clear: _I won gold, now you owe me a kiss._

Lauren and Payson headed down to the floor a few minutes before it opened up, leaving Ava and the men behind. She felt like she was going on her first date, which was kind of nice considering that she never got a real first date. Her first everything was with Carter, and none of it was sweet or romantic. But maybe Carter wasn't her first _everything_, because what she was feeling right now was new. Nobody had ever given her butterflies the way Jake did.

She was depending on her flirting skills to get past security, and it had worked the first time around, but this time the guard was a woman. Lauren tried flirting anyway, and Payson tried her 'most charming person on the face of the planet' schpeel, but nothing worked. Finally Lauren appealed to the security guard's feminine compassion.

"Please, I'm begging you. Every guy I've ever dated has been a jerk, but that guy out there, he's the real deal. And I have a date with him in—" she checked her watch "—two minutes in the middle of the mat to have our first kiss. This is the single most romantic experience of my life._ Please_ don't let me miss it."

The woman's resolve wavered and then broke. "Fine, let me see your credentials again."

"Thank you! Thank you, thank you, thank you!"

Lauren took a long, deep breath before she stepped past the security guard, prompting Payson to say, "What are you waiting for? Go get your man!"

All of her nerves disappeared as soon as she took action. It was just like competing, she told herself. She had control over the situation, not the other way around.

She didn't say his name or alert him to her presence at all. She let him find her, which he did quickly. He'd been casting his eyes toward where they were supposed to meet since before she stepped onto the floor. He disentangled himself from the reporters he was speaking to and came her way, stopping just inches away from her.

"Now we're both gold medalists," he said.

"Looks like. Of course, I have a silver, too, but it's okay that you don't. I won't hold it against you." Now that he won, she was more than willing to tease him again.

"You've always gotta one-up me, don't you, Barbie? Well, you can gloat all you want later, but right now you owe me something."

"Hmm, I think you're right. I guess I should pay up." She leaned forward and pecked him on the cheek, but as she pulled away he turned his head so that their lips met. The earth moved.

It was impossible not to respond; she needed to kiss him like she needed to breathe. She leaned into him and he responded by slipping his arms around her waist and pulling her against his chest. It was the most innocent, pure kiss she'd ever been a part of, and also the _best_ kiss.

The first time he swept his tongue against hers she lost herself to the pleasure. She wasn't sure how long they stayed that way, kissing in the middle of the mat that he just won his championship on, but she knew that he didn't give any other interviews. When they finally parted, he led her out of the arena, stopping only to collect his gym bag out of the locker room. Lauren caught Payson's eye across the crowds and indicated that she was leaving with Jake, and then they were gone. Finally, after eighteen years, she was getting a real first date.

* * *

><p>AN: Movie reference alert. Did anyone catch it? (hint: there is a clue in this author's note)

Also, I just realized that the site undid all of my formatting for the Cosmo Quiz last chapter so that it read weird and might not have even made sense. I have very awkwardly worked around the problem, so it might be easier to read now.


	68. Chapter 68

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

A/N: Headed back to Boulder…

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><p>Austin was vaguely aware of a chiming noise intruding on his sleep, and then more aware of Payson sliding out from under his arm. She whispered something about meeting MJ, kissed him, and left, and he fell back asleep before he could even register what happened.<p>

He woke up much later, but still earlier than he planned. He was roused by the lack of Payson's warmth in the bed, and it took him several seconds to remember why she wasn't there.

Nicky and Sasha were already up when he came into the living room. They were both early risers, so they'd probably already been to breakfast and back. Sasha glanced up from his newspaper and asked, "Where's Payson?"

"She left at some ungodly hour to meet MJ. I texted her and she said she'd be back soon."

"There is a suspicious lack of women in this apartment," Nicky said. "The door to Lauren's room is open and she's not in it. I don't think she ever came back last night."

As if on cue, the front door opened and Lauren walked in with circles under her eyes and her shoes in her hands. Austin almost wondered if she' been waiting in the hallway to hear a mention of her name, because the timing was so bizarre.

Sasha raised an eyebrow but didn't ask any questions. He wasn't her coach anymore so he didn't grill her for information, but he had a commanding enough presence that Lauren would tell him without being asked.

"Don't look at me like that," she said. "We _talked_. That was it."

"All night?" Austin asked.

"Yes. I'm not doing girl talk with a room full of men, but yes, we talked all night." She looked around the room. "Where's Payson?"

"Out with MJ somewhere. She said she'd be back soon, but who knows what that means. It could be an hour or five minutes."

It was about fifteen minutes, long enough for Lauren to take a shower and come back to the living room with a comb to detangle her hair. It was an oddly comfortable arrangement, the four of them sitting together while the men teased Lauren about the night before. She teased back with equal good humor, and they were all laughing so hard that they didn't notice when Payson returned.

"I'm sorry to interrupt the party," she said, drawing their attention. She was standing in the doorway holding what appeared to be a rolled up magazine. She came in the room and kissed first Austin and then Sasha hello. "This might entertain you, too, though."

She perched on the arm of the couch and read aloud from the cover of the magazine, "Love at the London Olympics: U.S. Gymnastics Rules the Podium and the Heart."

"Aren't you tired of reading about you and Austin by now?" Nicky asked. "You've been on every cover for weeks."

"Oh this isn't about me and Austin." She flipped the tabloid around so that they could see the cover. Spread across it was a large picture of Lauren and her wrestler kissing after his medal ceremony. Lauren blushed and Payson opened to the article and read, "'Payson Keeler and Austin Tucker, perhaps the most famous couple in sports, might have a monopoly on medals, but not on love.' Gag me. 'Olympic Champion Lauren Tanner, often called the Queen of the Beam, also holds court in the heart of newly crowned wrestling Champion Jake Williams'… 'Sources say that Tanner and Williams met at the Olympic Village and have been smitten with each other ever since, often traveling out of their way to spend a few minutes together.' Hey, they're getting stuff right."

She flipped the page and continued reading, "'There must be something in the air at the U.S. training facility (other than gym chalk), because love has spread like wildfire'… 'It appears that London is not lovely enough for uneven-bars specialist Emily Kmetko and her long-time boyfriend, rocker Damon Young. They were seen together on Wednesday boarding a plane bound for Paris.' Oh, this is great… 'The love bug has become pandemic, spreading beyond the gymnasts and into their families. Steve Tanner and Chloe Kmetko, parents of the two champion gymnasts, have sparked a romance of their own…'" Payson's eyes widened and she stopped reading out loud. "Shit. This just stopped being funny."

Her tone concerned Austin even more than her words. She wasn't just upset by what she was reading, she was worried. "Tell us what it says, Pay."

She swallowed a couple of times before she read, "'The family ties continue to grow. Nicky Russo, Olympic Champion on the still rings, has scarcely been seen without the company of Ava Tucker, younger sister of his teammate Austin Tucker. The two lovebirds have been sighted flying all around London.' There's a picture with it, of you and Ava on the London Eye."

"You're right, that's not remotely funny," Nicky agreed, a deep frown marring his face. "I really hope Kelly doesn't see that trash. She's already upset because she thinks I replaced her."

"Oh God, poor Kelly," Lauren said.

Payson reached out and squeezed Nicky's hand. "Don't worry, we'll take care of her. I was supposed to share a room with Emily when we're out on the publicity run, but we'll put Kelly in there instead. You can't get much better than Emily for support, and then I bet she could probably stay at Kaylie's place for a while, too, so she won't have to be alone in her apartment."

"Thanks, Payson," Nicky said. "She's had more than her share of hurt in her life, so I'm glad she has you guys to look out for her now."

"We're here for you too, you know," Lauren told Nicky.

"I know, and I appreciate it. But can we just burn that stupid magazine or something?"

"I think it's against the fire code in the apartment," Sasha said, with such seriousness that Austin had to snort. If it wasn't against the rules, Sasha would probably be pulling a lighter out of his pocket to set the damn thing on fire.

Payson tossed the tabloid in the trashcan and said, "Okay, enough of this crap. There's plenty of real gossip to talk about without making up more. Lauren, spill. What happened last night?"

Austin would die before he admitted that he wanted to hear almost as much as Payson did. He wasn't alone, either. Nicky and Sasha were pretending to read, which is what they were doing when he first came out of his room that morning, but neither turned a page while Lauren gushed about her date. Austin was just as interested in what Payson said, too, because he'd never seen Payson do the girl talk thing and he loved discovering new sides of her.

They talked for nearly an hour, but Lauren still had more to say when Payson had to leave for the hospital. The last time she had bloodwork done was on Tuesday, and those results had been so good that they pushed off her Thursday appointment—because drawing blood from a person with low blood counts is counteractive unless there is a good reason, the doctor said—but they still needed to keep track of her levels and she was due for another dose of Aranesp.

"I want to hear the rest of this," Payson told her friend, "but it'll have to be later tonight. I have a doctor's appointment and then my sadistic agent has scheduled me for six or seven camera interviews."

Nicky sent her a wary glance. "That's a joke, right?"

"Oh, I wish it was. MJ is psychotic. She reserved one of the Olympic Committee's media rooms and different news stations are just going to come in one after the other and do interviews, and I have to change clothes between each one so it doesn't look like I did them all on the same day. My own personal version of hell. But we've got to leave or we'll be late. Are you ready, Sasha?"

Sasha understood the details of Payson's medical treatment much better than Austin did, so he would be the one to accompany her to the hospital. She wasn't having an ultrasound, and wouldn't until they got back from the press tour. Since she wasn't doing gymnastics anymore the danger to the baby was over, so they would have one more check up and then no more ultrasounds until they found out the sex of the baby at twenty weeks. Austin would miss seeing how his child grew each week.

Austin wasn't allowed to go to the interviews after the appointment. MJ said that having him around too much would be just as bad as not enough; Payson couldn't be viewed as needy. Rules were imposed on Sasha, too. He could go as supervision only, with no touching, no joking around, and no drawing attention to himself. He was to "be seen and not heard, and seen as little as possible," according to MJ. Payson would be bored out of her skull and Austin would have to deal with a grumpy girlfriend at the end of the day.

She kissed him goodbye before she left. "I'll call you when we leave the hospital, babe. You guys have fun watching the diving competition."

o-O-o

This was Sasha's third Olympics but his first Closing Ceremony. He'd never stayed to the end of the two weeks before, much less attended the ceremony, but Payson wanted to go. She was too sick to go to the Opening Ceremony, and even though she could never make up that experience, the Closing Ceremony was the next best thing.

The two ceremonies were very different experiences. The Opening Ceremony was full of hope and excitement, whereas the Closing Ceremony was a mixture of celebration, disappointment, and sadness that the Olympic experience was over. But the biggest difference lay in the way the parade of athletes was arranged. At the start of the Olympics the athletes marched in by country and the people wearing different colors were the competition. At the end, everybody was mixed together and national loyalties were cast aside in favor of international friendship. There was no other situation in the world that could lead to Payson Keeler, Lauren Tanner, Ivanka Kirilenko, and Elisabeta Patrescu dancing together and having the time of their lives.

If he coached another Olympics he would encourage his gymnasts to attend the Closing Ceremony, because it was too cool of an experience to pass up. He snapped a picture of the four girls together and it would go up in his office as a reminder to himself that there was more to international competition than just competition.

It was a short night of sleep after the ceremony, because they had to be at Heathrow early Monday morning to catch a flight back to Denver. They were doing a pointless amount of flying, because Sasha and the girls had to be in New York by noon on Tuesday, but everybody wanted it this way. Ostensibly they were going home to repack. They had been living out of suitcases for over two weeks, so they all needed to refresh their wardrobes for the next week of media travel. The truth was, though, that Lauren and Payson just wanted to sleep in their own beds for a night. Or, in Payson's case, Sasha's bed.

It was late in the afternoon when they landed in Denver, and still later when Sasha and Payson made it back to their apartment. They were met at the airport by the Keelers and Steve Tanner, who left London with everyone else on Wednesday, and made their way to a welcome home barbeque in the Tanner's backyard. Emily and Damon got in earlier the same day and Kaylie was already in Boulder, so the whole team was there. It was nice, but at the same time all he wanted to do was to get back home with Payson. The dinner didn't last too long, though, because all of the travelers were exhausted and most had to fly again the next day. Lauren went to bed, Nicky and Ava went to Austin's house for the night, and Payson and Sasha went home.

Payson was spread out on the bed by the time he carried in the last of their suitcases. Her eyes were closed but she was awake. "Did it really happen?" she asked.

"It did." He climbed onto the bed next to her and she rolled into his chest. "You really went to the Olympics. You really made it through. You really won five gold medals and a silver. You did it, Payson. You made your dreams come true."

She pressed a kiss to his jaw and said, "I didn't do it alone. If it weren't for you I wouldn't even be doing gymnastics anymore, much less be an Olympic Champion. Thank you for believing in me."

He kissed her and then brought her right hand up to his lips and kissed the gold band on her finger. "I meant what I said. I've known since you were eleven that you were destined for greatness."

She snuggled closer, wrapping her arms around his torso. She was halfway to sleep. "I'm so glad to be home."

"Me too. I've missed this."

Payson hummed her agreement. "I loved every second I spent with my teammates, but I'll be good to have time alone with you again."

If he didn't move they were going to fall asleep, so he disentangled himself from her arms and stood up. "I'm going to take a shower," he said. "Don't fall asleep while I'm gone."

She didn't listen. He was gone for five minutes, but when he came out of the bathroom Payson was curled on her side with her hands folded beneath her head. It was such a sweet sight that he hated to interrupt it, but he knew Payson. If she went to sleep wearing the same clothes that she flew in for fifteen hours she would wake up feeling disgusting. He knelt beside her and rubbed her shoulder.

"Wake up, love. Time for you to take a shower."

"No."

He tried not to laugh at her petulant tone, but it was so cute. It also eased any worry that he might have felt otherwise, because it showed that her sleepiness had nothing to do with her illness. When she was sick she was too tired to respond at all.

"Yes. Come on. You'll be cranky tomorrow if you don't take a shower, and I don't like you when you're cranky," he teased. He picked her up and carried her into the bathroom, and she was tired enough not to protest. He waited until he was sure she was awake enough to shower on her own before he left her.

While Payson was in the bathroom, Sasha unzipped their bags and started sorting their clothes into laundry piles. They didn't have time wash clothes before they left for New York, but the alternative was just dumping their clothes into one large pile to free up space in their suitcases, and that would piss Payson off. He was halfway through her second bag when he realized that he was sorting their clothes together in one load. She'd been doing his laundry since she moved in, but he wasn't sure at what point he came to expect that their clothes would be washed together. Or at what point he became comfortable handling her underwear.

He knew exactly, on the other hand, when Payson became comfortable coming out of the bathroom in front of him wearing nothing but a towel. That happened on the third day she spent with him. Not much later, around the same time that she took over part of his closet and dresser, she started stealing his clothes, which she did now without hesitation. She chose one of his t-shirts and a pair of his boxers to sleep in. She'd been trying to make things easier for him lately, but she was either too tired or too comfortable being home to think about the fact that she was changing clothes in front of him.

She walked to where he was standing in front of an opened suitcase and wrapped her arms around him from behind. She pressed her face against his shoulder and mumbled, "Thank you for doing that."

"You do the laundry," he said, "so the least I can do is sort it."

"Still thank you. But let's leave it for the morning. I'd rather go to bed now and wake up early to get ready. Come to bed."

She could have no idea what it did to him to hear her say those words. There were a few different three-little-words phrases that men liked to hear, and 'come to bed' was right up there with 'I want you.' Payson didn't mean anything remotely sexual, though, so he tried to ignore it. Like he was ignoring the fact that she was wearing his clothes and that was hot as hell.

They climbed into bed together and she settled on top of him. It felt strange to have so much room around them. In the Village they slept on a twin bed and there was barely room to roll over, much less spread out, but they could sleep without touching on this bed. That was why it felt so weird to him. They always touched, no matter where they were, and Payson was especially cuddly when she was sleeping. They didn't need that much room.

She was asleep within seconds, and it didn't take him long to follow. It had been a long, crazy, amazing few weeks, filled with some of the best moments in his life and also the scariest, and it was already blurring into a dream-like memory. He needed a healthy dose of normal, and even though it was crazy, sleeping with Payson in the apartment they shared together felt normal for him. It was really, really good to be home.


	69. Chapter 69

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

A/N: I know, I know, ya'll want more Payson and Sasha. This chapter is Paystin, but next chapter is SUPER Sasha/Payson.

* * *

><p>"Austin!"<p>

Payson spotted him from across the hotel lobby and ran into his arms. He felt like it had been years since he saw her last, though in reality it was only days. It was now Friday, and he hadn't seen her since their quick kiss goodbye on Tuesday morning before she left for New York. By his standards, that was way too damn long.

They stood greeting each other until Jake Dalton interrupted them with, "Don't I get a kiss, too, Pay? It's been longer since you saw me than since you saw Austin."

Payson laughed. "Of course you get a kiss. I'm so happy to see you again." She gave Jake a hug and a quick peck on the lips. It was funny to see Jake's face when Payson gave him that kiss, because he had not been expecting her to take him seriously. He should have learned by now that joking with Payson led to unexpected consequences.

The rest of the women made their way over (they didn't run like Payson did), and there was a flurry of hugs and hellos all around. The two teams would be in the same place for about twelve hours, the only overlap in their press weeks. The men started out in LA and switched to New York while the women started out in New York and would travel to LA the next morning. They planned to make the most out of their time together.

"I have a present for you," Austin told his girlfriend.

"Ooh, I love presents. What is it?"

"I don't know. It's not from me, it's from Kevin." He dug through his carry on to find what he was looking for and pulled it out with a triumphant "Ah-ha!"

Kevin and Peter weren't with them this week. They had families and had been gone for a long time, so they went home to see their wives and children and let the men go out on press tour by themselves. The youngest man on the team was nineteen year old Nicky, so there was no need for supervision, but they got it anyway in the form of Nicky and Austin's agents. MJ was with Payson, too. The savvy agent had other clients coming off the Olympics, too, but Payson was by far the most important so she was traveling with the gymnastics team and handling her other charges during spare moments.

Payson opened the package from Kevin to reveal a framed copy of her second Sports Illustrated cover (the third came out just the day before). It matched the frames that he gave her for her birthday, and there was a note with it: _Apparently I gave you one too few of these at your party. Congratulations, little one. I'm proud of you. –Kevin_

"This is so sweet," she said. "Kevin is such a wonderful person."

Austin couldn't agree more. Kevin was more of a father to him than his biological dad ever was. He was glad that Payson was bonding with his surrogate father.

The group drifted toward the hotel restaurant, where they were having dinner together. The manager of the restaurant probably regretted making that particular reservation, because they were boisterous. The men and women had a week worth of events to catch up on, and most of those stories were swapped with animated hand gestures, laughter, and even a few reenactments. At least three water glasses were knocked over, and Lauren shrieked loud enough to raise the dead when Steven dropped a piece of ice down the back of her dress. Austin was sure that they got a lot of complaints from the other customers.

Kelly looked much happier. The time with her grandmother had helped, as had the three nights she'd spent with Emily. Payson was right about Emily being good for Kelly. They were even talking about the possibility of Kelly moving out to LA with Emily and Damon. It was too late for her to apply to UCLA, but she could start at a community college and then transfer in later, and a fresh start would be good for her. Colorado had been a toxic place for Kelly, so she needed to get out.

Lauren's romance had not ended with the Olympics. J-Lo, as her teammates called them, was going strong and it turned out that he was from San Francisco, so they would be within an easy commute from each other when Lauren moved to Stanford in a few weeks. Austin had never seen Lauren with so much self-confidence.

It was a fun night of catching up, and when they left the restaurant Sasha left a tip that was bigger than their bill. Not only had they been pains in the ass, they also stayed for hours doing nothing but talking. The few drinks that the men ordered during that time were not enough to compensate for the amount of space that they were taking up.

The party didn't end after dinner. The men followed the girls into Lauren and Kaylie's room and eight people piled onto two beds to watch a movie. Payson and Austin didn't attend.

He reserved a room separate from the rest of the group for the night so that they could have some time alone, and they spent a little while focused on nothing but themselves. They forgot about everything while they made love, and then laid together after just relishing the feeling of skin on skin. He was fascinated by her stomach. It was amazing to him that when he left her on Tuesday her stomach was flat, but when he saw her again on Friday she had a small bump. He knew it wasn't that simple, that she had probably been growing just a little bit each day, but since he hadn't seen her for several days it was more noticeable to him.

He couldn't tell at all when she was dressed. It wasn't until they were in bed together that he realized how much her body had changed. It was subtle, just a slight rounding of her belly where it was once flat, but it was the most beautiful thing he'd ever seen. That was his child in there.

"I'm so glad there's a bump now," she said. "Feeling pregnant but not looking pregnant was getting old. I know that we're hoping that I don't show much so people won't find out, but it's nice to be able to see the difference myself."

"You're twelve weeks on Sunday, right? How soon do people usually start noticing?"

She chuckled. He didn't get the joke, so she explained it to him, "Every pregnant woman in the world wants to know that answer, including me, but nobody does. It's different for everyone. My mom said she showed early with me but not until a lot later with Becca, but then it's the opposite for a lot of women, too. If you look up pictures, some people are huge by twelve weeks and some still look like I do when they're fifteen or sixteen weeks. I _wish_ I knew when I'll show enough to be noticeable, but I don't have a clue. All I know is that Dr. Lehmann said I might not show until later because I have wide hips."

"I love your hips." He rolled them so that he was towering over her and moved his hands to grasp either side of the body part under discussion. "They make me go all primal and all I can think about is holding on to them while I come inside you."

Her laugh rang through the room. "Easy there, caveman. We have all night to make that happen."

"Hmm, I'm not sure this can wait," he teased. He kissed his way down the column of her throat, heading for her breasts, and she moaned.

"But we still… have things to… _oh_… things to talk about."

He smirked against her skin. "But we have all night, remember?"

"You're horrible," she said, but her body was responding.

"That's right, I'm a bad, bad man."

She shouted out a laugh and hit him with a pillow, but as soon as he rolled away from her she tackled him. He loved her like this. Her playful nature was part of why he fell in love with her in the first place, and it had been so long since she'd been like this. She was such a mess after their hook up, trying to deal with the emotional backlash of that night, and then she was too sick and too scared to be this lighthearted. He was pretty sure that this would be one of their times together that he remembered best, because it was what he always imagined being with Payson would be like.

Later, when she was lying panting beside him, she reminded him, "I was serious earlier. We still have things to talk about. I want to know everything that you didn't get to tell me on the phone."

"Uh-uh, you first. Tell me about your appointment this morning."

He joked that she was collecting doctors all over the world, and it wasn't that far from the truth. The doctors in Boulder recommended her to doctors in London, who in turn recommended her to a doctor in New York. She wasn't seeing an obstetrician this time—she would wait to see Dr. Lehmann in Colorado the next week—but she needed to see a hematologist. She went to the hospital that morning.

"I already told you," she whined.

"You said 'My levels were good and I got a transfusion.' That is not enough information, Pay."

She arranged her face into a petulant expression. "Fine. I just hate talking about this stuff. I'm so tired of it."

"I know, but it's important. I need you to keep me up to date on this."

"There really isn't that much to tell. My hematocrit was at twenty eight percent. The doctor said that my blood was still dying faster than the new blood was being made, but it's a lot better than it was. But we already knew that. If it wasn't better I wouldn't have been able to go for two weeks before I needed another transfusion, which to me feels about like a miracle right now."

It felt like a miracle to Austin, too. After having been so scared that Payson would die, her problems slowing down seemed like a gift from God. "So the ESA is really working?"

"It is. I have to have another injection tomorrow and _Sasha_ has to give it to me. I'm not looking forward to that."

"Why would Sasha have to give you your shot?" This was the first Austin was hearing about this. She didn't mention it when she called him earlier that day.

"I'm supposed to get them at about the same time every week, which with the time change ends up at about seven tomorrow morning, right before we fly. I don't have time to go to the hospital, so Sasha is going to give it to me before we leave."

"Huh," he said. "Is that safe?"

Payson grimaced. "Safe? Yes. He has basic medic training from when he was coaching in Romania. But something that I'm happy about? Hell no. I don't want anyone coming at me with a needle who isn't a doctor or a nurse."

"I'm right there with you. I sure as hell wouldn't want Sasha to give me a shot." Austin conjured an image in his head of Sasha standing in front of him with a hypodermic needle in his hand and an evil glint in his eye. Actually, Sasha could make a pretty badass super villain, because he could be downright scary when he wanted to be. He wouldn't be an evil doctor though; he would be something with super powers. For some reason Austin was picturing him as a vampire, probably because he looked kind of like that guy on _Blade_.

Payson was looking at him funny. "What? You've got a weird look on your face."

He shook his head to clear away the image of Sasha with fangs and said, "Nothing, I just had a really bizarre thought. Not worth talking about. You wanted to hear about LA with the guys, right?"

"Yeah," she said. He couldn't believe she was letting him get away with that diversion. "Tell me everything."

He did. He told her everything that he forgot to tell her over the phone and a few things that he remembered but couldn't say in front of other people, like how Nicky was doing or Max's journey down the path to self-destruction, and then she returned the favor for him. She gave him details about her media appearances, told him stories about the adventures the five women were having together, and talked in depth about the houses that she and Sasha were planning to look at when they got back home. They talked until they were both hoarse and were too tired to stay awake any longer.

Saying goodbye to her the next morning sucked just as much as it did when they said goodbye on Tuesday, and he was already counting down the days until they were together again in Boulder. Four days to go.

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><p>AN: I didn't proof this, so let me know if there are errors.


	70. Chapter 70

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

A/N: I did promise you that this chapter would be super Sasha/Payson…

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><p>The first thing that Samantha Roberts did when she walked into the house on Placid Drive was to turn on the air conditioner. It was warm outside and she needed her clients to be comfortable. Comfortable people were more likely to buy houses.<p>

The house had been on the market for nearly a year and the calls on it were few and far between, so she really needed to sell it to the couple viewing it today. If it was just this one house that wasn't selling she wouldn't be so desperate, but none of them were. The market was down and people just weren't buying homes right now. She needed the commission on this house to be able to pay the mortgage on her own.

The couple was on time, which was a good sign, but they were young, which was a bad one. Most young couples these days couldn't afford a house at all, much less one that was more than half a million dollars.

She shook both of their hands. "Hi, I'm Samantha. You must be Sasha and Payson." She wasn't entirely sure which was which, because they both sounded like girl's names to her.

"It's nice to meet you, Samantha," the man said. His rich British accent gave her quivers. She was happily married, but she could still appreciate a gorgeous man when she saw one, and he was. Apparently his wife was jealous, though, because she wrapped her arm around his waist and leaned into him. It screamed 'get away from my man.'

She studied the couple as she showed them around the first few rooms. He was older than her, but she couldn't tell by how much. He was in his late twenties or early thirties, she thought, and the girl was early twenties. She was obviously arm candy, and judging by the way she hung all over him, she played her role well. They were nauseating, touching and kissing so much. Was that kind of behavior really necessary in public?

Maybe he was a sugar daddy and he was loaded? She decided to test the waters and see. "The asking price is six fifty, but that isn't set in stone. If it doesn't fit into your budget there is a little bit of wiggle room."

There were usually two reactions to that statement. If they could afford the house they would show mild interest at the idea of saving money. If they couldn't afford it, they would look relieved that the price might be talked down. Never in fifteen years of selling real estate did Samantha hear a woman snort and say, "We don't have a budget."

So they were screwing with her. It wasn't the first time it had happened. People came in all the time wanting to look at houses just for fun, the adult version of playing pretend. They looked at the houses up for sale and dreamed about one day owning them, even though it might never be an option. This was the first time she'd ever had someone brazen enough admit it.

She was pissed and wanted to kick them out of the house, but she couldn't. They might call her company and complain on her. She sure as hell wasn't going to continue to kiss their asses, though. The rest of the showing was going to be cursory.

They wouldn't cooperate. They lingered in each room, pointing out things that they liked and didn't like, until they reached the kitchen. There they acted even odder.

"Is this a good enough kitchen for you, Pay?" the young man asked his wife. He was teasing her, and it was pretty obvious why. It wasn't like she was ever going to _get_ that kitchen. At least Samantha did figure out that the woman was Payson and the man was Sasha. Who named a man Sasha?

"It's certainly better than what we have in the apartment. I actually have room to turn around," Payson said, a wide grin spreading across her face. "But you still won't be allowed in here. You'd set something on fire and cause smoke damage to the whole room."

This was bizarre. They came to look at a house they couldn't afford, _told_ her that they couldn't afford it, and now were talking about the kitchen like they were actually going to live there. Maybe they were high. They didn't look high, but appearances could be deceiving. Samantha gave her usual speech to appease the crazy people. "The kitchen has been completely renovated. Granite countertops, all new stainless steel appliances, state of the art stove. And of course you can see the recessed lighting above. This really is a gourmet kitchen."

"That's fitting," Sasha said. "Payson's a gourmet cook."

The girl blushed at the compliment and kissed him on the jaw, prompting him to give her a real kiss. It was practically foreplay.

They moved on, and the couple's behavior only got stranger. In the breakfast nook Sasha pointed to the built in shelves covering one wall and said, "Look, there's already a place for all our trophies."

"Where are yours now?" Payson asked. "I've never seen them."

"They're boxed up in Cambria. I haven't looked at them in years, but I can't let you get all the glory in our house, can I? We'll have to put both of ours up together."

"Well, we'll put them in a display case so they collect less dust. That's a lot trophies to clean."

Samantha had no idea what they were talking about. Trophies? Like bowling trophies, or high school sports trophies?

They moved upstairs and it was more of the same. They examined everything closely and talked about what they liked or what changes they would make as if they were actually going to buy the house. It was infuriating. She didn't have time to waste on people playing games. She could be spending this time showing a house to a real customer.

When they entered the master bathroom, Payson pressed her face into her husband's arm to stifle her laughter. It was clear what she was laughing at—the faux-Grecian statue affixed to the end of the bathtub that portrayed a nude woman washing herself. Samantha told the owners to get rid of that stupid statue, but they insisted that it was 'art' and people would love it. So far nobody had.

Sasha kept his composure and said, "We'd renovate the bathroom, of course." Then they left the bathroom and dismissed it from their notice. So weird.

They walked through the rest of the upstairs and the finished basement and then made their way outside. Sasha spent some time evaluating the structure of the house, giving the impression that he was an experienced buyer. Maybe they owned a smaller house already and were just looking to compare.

"It needs some work," he said. "It's an older house and that always comes with problems."

Payson agreed but added, "I still really like it though. I think it fits us. The only other one we've seen that has the kind of acreage we want is that place on Valmont and it's so"—she wrinkled her nose—"_showy_."

There was only one house for sale on Valmont, and every realtor in the city was familiar with it, because they all wanted the commission. It was a four million dollar house. Samantha had made a huge mistake. When Payson said that they didn't have a budget, she didn't mean that they couldn't afford a house, she meant that they could afford _any_ house.

The realtor thought she might throw up. She'd spent the last hour giving the cold shoulder to people who could afford to buy this house and several more on top of it. She hoped that she could salvage the deal. They seemed very interested, so maybe it wasn't a lost cause. She put on all the charm that she could manage.

"Well, the land here really is fantastic. There are nearly fifteen acres, well treed, and some nice landscaped areas as well. If you'd like to follow me down just a little bit I'll show you around."

They walked past the immediate back yard, of which she pointed out every selling point, and down a set of stone steps. A few hundred yards from the house was a small garden area with a bench and man-made pond. People tended to really love it.

"Look Sasha," Payson said, "There's a pond for you to fish in."

"Very funny, love. You know what else would be funny? You taking an unexpected bath in that pond."

Samantha was pretty sure he was kidding, but rather than risk it she said, "Do you like to fish, Sasha? There is a real pond behind us, some of the men in the area fish there. Would you like to see it?"

They walked way more than she wanted to in her high heels, but she thought she might have salvaged the sale. They loved everything that she showed them, and when they got back to the porch Sasha was talking about new siding and a new roof.

"We're looking to move pretty quickly," Payson said. "How fast could we close on this?"

Bingo. They wanted the house and they wanted to do it quickly, which meant full asking price and probably some extra fees. "We could put an offer in today, and then the process usually takes six to eight weeks. It would be possible to have you in the house by early October."

Payson flashed a condescending smile. "I'm sorry, you misunderstood. When I said we want to move quickly I meant in the next couple of weeks. We're paying cash so we don't have to wait for a bank to process a loan. I realize that you're going to want to squeeze us for every dime possible to rush this, and honestly I'm okay with that as long as we can do this as fast as possible. What is the absolute earliest that we could close with a cash payment?"

Samantha barely had time to process the words 'cash payment' before Sasha said, "I didn't realize you hated our apartment so much, love. Why the mad rush?"

"Have you forgotten the reason that we're moving in the first place? I don't want to be in the middle of a move six or seven weeks from now." Lovers' quarrels weren't uncommon in real estate, but they could derail a sale if they went on for too long. The agent was thinking of the best way to diffuse the situation when Sasha's words stopped her.

"Ah, good point. You're right, the sooner the better."

Payson must wear the pants in this relationship. Samantha was quick to get the discussion back on track while she still had a shot. "I'm sure that we can work something out for you. Without the bank's involvement we can speed things up quite a bit, possibly as quick as ten to fourteen days. Would that work for you?"

"Much better," Payson agreed. She raised an eyebrow at her husband and asked him, "What do you think? Obviously we need to get an inspection and I have to talk to Austin before we decide anything, but is this what you want?"

He nodded. "I think you were right before. This place fits us. As long as everything checks out okay, I say we go for it."

"The house has already had an inspection on it," Samantha said, "and everything looked great. I can get you a copy of it if you'd like."

"Thank you," he said, "but we'll hire our own inspector. We're willing to pay what's fair for rushing the sale, but we're not going to take a bath on this house just because we're in a hurry. An independent inspector might see things differently than the inspector who is paid by the company selling the house, and if he _does_ find any problems, they'll be fixed at the seller's expense."

Damn, she hated when she got customers who knew what they were doing. Still, she was getting a good deal out of them, so she couldn't complain too much. "When would you like to schedule the inspection? I can set it up so that one of my staff members is present for the process."

"Let's shoot for tomorrow," Payson said. "I'll make some calls this afternoon and see if we can throw some money around to get an immediate appointment."

She was incredibly flippant about using her money to get her way. Samantha wondered just how much money they had, and whose it was. They must be very wealthy to afford the house on Valmont, but did one of them come from a rich family, or both, or were they self made millionaires? She would have to google them later and see what she could dig up.

She ended up getting impatient. Sasha expressed a need to get back to work, so the couple left and agreed to call about the inspection as soon as they found out any details. Samantha stood in the doorway to the house watching them drive away, and then pulled out her cell phone. She thought he said their last name was Belov, so she would search for Sasha and Payson Belov and see what popped up.

She typed in S-a-s-h, and Sasha Belov came up as one of the most popular search terms. He must be well known to be on a most common search list. She clicked on it and waited for the screen to load.

For the second time that day she realized that she had completely misinterpreted the situation. They weren't Sasha and Payson Belov; they were Sasha Belov and Payson Keeler. Samantha's client was the little sick girl who won all of those Olympic medals. How had she missed that?

This was huge. Payson was supposed to be involved with that other gymnast, Austin something or other, but here she was living with her coach. She did say something about talking to Austin before they put an offer on the house, though, so Samantha wasn't sure what that meant, but she was sure about one thing—the tabloids would pay out the ass for this information. Way more than what she was going to get in commission for this sell.

She was wracking her brain to figure out how to get in touch with The National Enquirer when it occurred to her that what she was about to do was unethical. She couldn't use information from work for her own gain. She could lose her license for that. Or worse, she could get sued. If Payson and Sasha sued her then she might lose even more money than she got paid for the information, and she would be in an even bigger hole than she was now. Damn it, she couldn't risk getting sued. She had the scoop of a lifetime and she had to keep it to herself. This was so unfair.

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><p>AN: My mom and I are so guilty of looking at houses for fun. Sometimes we go to all the open houses on the weekends and say that we're looking for a house for my sister who's planning to move back in town.

Pictures of the house are on my pinterest. I spent hours upon hours looking for their house, but it's off the market now. Putting the pics up may be illegal, I'm not sure, so _shhh_. Oh, and there is also a picture of Sasha with fangs on there from the last chapter :)

Thank you again to Zabini for reminding me to post! I would lose my head without you!


	71. Chapter 71

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

A/N: This turned out to be an extremely long chapter. Thank you Fantasylover for reminding me to update :)

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><p>Sasha came to stand by Payson on the side of the floor. She was watching a group of Level 10s working on their tumbling in pairs.<p>

"This is kind of genius," he said.

Her lips twitched into a hint of a smile. "I know." She was teaching all of the level 8, 9, and 10 girls' classes now, along with the toddler classes and helping out with the elites who were left after the Olympics. She'd only been coaching for two weeks, but she was a natural. Today she paired them off to evaluate and improve one another's tumbling, with the best gymnasts each working with one of the weaker gymnasts. The ones who were struggling got the benefit of help and a good example from their more experienced teammates, while the stronger gymnasts learned to teach the skills, which in turn improved their own tumbling. The best way to learn something was to teach it to someone else.

"February 16th," she said out of the blue.

"Excuse me?" He heard her, but he didn't know what she meant.

"February 16th," she repeated. "That's the day of Jess's elite qualifier."

Damn, she was way ahead of him. Jessica Torres was one of their level tens who was ready to move up to the elite level, and she had to petition into a qualifying meet to do so. He hadn't even looked those dates up yet, even though he knew he needed to. There was too much else going on. This was the perfect opportunity to test Payson's coaching instincts, though. "You think she'll be ready by then? That's not much time to prepare."

She snorted. "Are you testing me, Sasha? You know as well as I do that she's ready. She's _been_ ready. You would have petitioned her this past spring if you didn't have to get us ready for the Olympics. Becca is a little more questionable, but I think she can be ready by February if she wants to try, too. She's mentioned it a few times, but she's never outright said that she wants to go elite. I'll talk to her and find out."

"Anyone else?" he asked. Just because she called him out on the test didn't mean that he was going to stop.

She pursed her lips in thought. "None for this coming year. Jess is Olympic track, Becca's ultimate goal would be a PanAm team in a couple of years, _maybe_ a Worlds team depending on how things shake up. Lizzie and Alyssa might go elite in a couple of years looking for college recruitment. Outside of that, I don't see any of our in house girls moving up for the 2016 quadrennial. But I'd place money on Katie Russell for the 2020 Olympics."

He searched his memory for a Katie Russell but came up empty. Payson smirked. She must have known that she just one-upped him.

"She's a level five," she told him. "Our youngest one, just seven years old. Throw a glance over at the fives next time they're in and you'll be able to tell which one I'm talking about. I noticed her a few months back and I've been keeping an eye on her. She has crazy natural talent."

Wow. Not only did Payson pass his test, she surpassed _him_. Her assessment of the current level tens was spot on, and he couldn't believe that she was already picking girls for the 2020 cycle. The level fives had a class the next evening, and he was going to take time to observe it. "Is this why you wanted the toddlers' class?" he asked. "Picking seven year olds for the Olympics wasn't good enough so you thought that you'd start with the three and four year olds?"

"Don't be snippy, Sasha. I wanted the toddlers because they're adorable. I love working with the little kids."

She did love it. They offered classes for the younger children on Wednesday afternoons and Saturday mornings, and Payson had been helping out for months just for fun. She was great at it. She almost always had a small child attached to her somehow—on her hip, piggyback, holding her hand, hanging on her legs. But thinking about Payson and kids made something else sink into his head. "Wait, February 16th? Isn't that awfully close to March 3rd?"

Payson was due on March 3rd, which would make her eight and a half months pregnant during Jess's elite qualification. She'd be ready to pop, or possibly popped already. It wouldn't be unheard of for the baby to come a couple of weeks ahead of schedule.

"It's as early as we can get," she said, "And we certainly can't do it afterward. The NGO is still taking bids to host the qualifying meets, so I thought we might be able to talk Marty into it. That way we don't have to travel, but we won't have any of the stress of hosting it ourselves."

"Wow, you really thought this through, didn't you?"

She threw him a scathing look. "Of course I did. Did you think that coaching was just a game of dress up for me?"

"Of course not, love," he backtracked. She wasn't really angry, but she was annoyed, and an annoyed Payson usually meant a Payson that didn't cook dinner. "I know you take your job seriously. I'm just impressed that you got all this figured out in such a short amount of time. I can't manage that level of planning. That's the reason I hired your mum."

Her lips twitched again, but she didn't let him off the hook. Instead she asked, "What are you even doing here? Shouldn't you be at home packing? Or hauling some furniture to Goodwill?"

They were moving in a week. They put an offer in on the house the day after they first looked at it, and it had gone through faster than anyone could have hoped. Neither of them had a problem with paying people off to make the move happen as fast as possible, and the result was that they would close next Tuesday, just twelve days after the process started. This entire week would be spent packing and, as Payson said, toting stuff to Goodwill. None of his "crappy bachelor furniture" would be coming with them to the new house. Sasha couldn't argue much; he'd slept on that couch for weeks and Payson was right. It was crappy bachelor furniture.

"I'm going now," he said. "I didn't just come down here to bug you, though. MJ called. She said that you and Austin are going to Beyonce's birthday party this weekend."

"What! Sasha, you should have told her no. She's not supposed to schedule thing on Fridays, it makes me miss class on Saturday morning. Besides, this was supposed to be our weekend off."

"Really, your idea of a weekend off involves walking down runways but _not_ parties?" Payson and Austin had spent the past few weekends in LA going to as many parties and red carpet events as MJ could wrangle them into, and this weekend the couple would be flying into New York for Payson to walk in the Heart Truth Red Dress Fashion Show.

"That's different," she insisted. "The Red Dress show is something that I actually want to do. MJ didn't plan it. As much as she would love to control my charity work as a publicity angle, I won't let her, and I'm not happy about her tagging onto it, either."

MJ did control his charity work when he was younger, but there was no good reason for her to control Payson's. Sasha let MJ connect him with whatever charity helped his image and couldn't have cared less about what they were, but Payson was involved in charity because she believed in the cause rather than because it looked good. Her support for the American Heart Association, the ASPCA, and Ronald McDonald House all came from very personal experiences, as did the gymnastics charities she founded. Despite the name, the Emily Kmetko Scholarship for Promising Gymnasts was created and funded by Payson. After she got her first big sponsorship, Payson started the scholarship in honor of her friend, and the two girls personally reviewed the applicants and chose the recipients together. She was hands on in every charity she was involved in.

The fashion show was a part of one of those charities. Every year the American Heart Association recruited celebrities to walk down the runway wearing red dresses to raise awareness of heart disease in women, and this year Payson was one of those women. She was chosen long before she got pregnant, though, and Sasha wasn't sure how it was going to work now.

"I'm still not clear on this fashion show thing," he said. "I saw the dress they designed for you and it's pretty revealing." Not revealing in that it showed a lot of skin, but revealing in that there was no way to hide a pregnancy in it. It was form fitting, and Payson's 'form' was growing rounder with each passing day. If she was wearing loose clothing, like the Rock t-shirt she had on now, her baby bump wasn't visible, but it would be in a slinky dress.

"I'm not wearing that dress anymore. MJ talked to the designer and got him to make me something a little more appropriate." They were both becoming masters talking about one thing and making it sound like another.

"And how did she explain the reason for the switch?"

Payson called out to the girls to get ready to show her the skills they had been working on and then said to Sasha, "Apparently in a wink wink, nudge nudge kind of way. She said not to worry about it, though, so I'm not going to. I have enough to worry about already. Now get the hell out of my gym so I can coach."

He barked out a laugh. She said that as if it was a completely normal way to end their conversation and ignored the fact that it was also _his_ gym. She was going to make one hell of a coach with that kind of self-assurance.

"Fine, I'm going," he said, holding his hands up in surrender. "Call me when you leave and I'll order us some dinner."

He kissed her and left, more than happy with how Payson was handling life after retirement. She was happier than he'd seen her in a long time, and the gym was benefiting from having her as a coach. Despite the difficulties that they still faced, things were going pretty damn well.

o-O-o

Sasha taped another box closed and added it to the others labeled 'Kitchen.' A couple of months ago his kitchen supplies consisted of nothing but a few dishes and utensils. Now he had five large boxes packed with stuff from that room, and he couldn't name over half of it. For a while he asked Payson what things were, but that annoyed her so he stopped.

He wasn't sure how so much stuff could come out of such a small apartment. He was sure that he didn't have this much stuff when he moved in, and not all of it could be blamed on Payson. The two boxes full of video game accessories, for example, were definitely his.

He started collecting frames that were scattered around his apartment and placing them on the coffee table. Payson was particular about the way things were packed, and one of her nitpicks was that anything breakable had to be bubble wrapped, so he would gather the frames first and pack them all at once. There were a lot more than he realized—Payson's _Sports Illustrated_ issues, pictures of his teams in Sydney, Athens, and London, a photograph of his mother, one of Amelia, several from the Rock. He was amused to realize that his two favorite photographs were of Payson and Lauren together—one with their individual gold medals at Worlds, and another of them dancing with Ivanka and Elisabeta in London.

He was picking up the last one when he heard a knock at the door. The only person he was expecting was Austin, but it was too early for him to be there… except that it wasn't. Once glance at the clock told him that it was two fifty, and Austin was supposed to pick Payson up at three for their flight to New York. Sasha was supposed to wake Payson up from her nap half an hour ago.

He opened the door with an explanation already on his lips. "Sorry, I lost track of time. She's… Summer?"

Summer Van Horne was standing on his doorstep, looking exactly like she had the day he threw her out of the gym. The same perfectly finished hair and make up, the same designer clothes, the same deceptive fuck-me-heels, and the same I-act-humble-but-I'm-really-fucking-conceited smile. It was like he'd just opened the door to his past mistakes. Maybe MJ would be following right behind her.

"Hi Sasha," she said. She didn't seem to realize how weird it was for her to be there. "I went by the gym but it was closed. Is everything okay?"

"Yeah, we took the afternoon off. There are no classes on Friday, and most of the elites have retired, so we're just doing half days for now." Why was he explaining this? "What the hell are you doing here?"

She flinched, either at the swearword or his unwelcoming tone. Probably at the swearword, because she didn't seem to get the 'you're not welcome' part of the message. "I wanted to congratulate you," she said. "The girls did so well at the Olympics, and I know that a lot of that was because of you."

This was the time when he was supposed to say something gracious like, "Thank you, I'm very proud of them," but nothing came out. He was still stuck on the part where Summer was at his apartment. When he didn't speak, she said, "Can I come in?"

He stepped aside for her, again wondering why he was doing it. He wanted her gone, not further in the apartment.

She looked around his half-packed apartment with wide eyes. "Are you leaving Boulder?"

It was a reasonable assumption for someone who didn't know him to make. He came to the Rock to coach Payson, Kaylie, Lauren, and Emily, and now that they were no longer training with him there was no obvious reason to stay. They had become his family, though, and the Rock his home, so anybody who knew him well knew that he would never leave. Summer just didn't know him nearly as well as she thought she did.

"No, I'm just moving out of the apartment. I bought a house."

"Oh, that's wonderful, Sasha!" She said with way too much enthusiasm. "I'm so glad you're not leaving."

"I don't mean to be rude," (yes he did), "but why do you care? Last I checked our lives had nothing to do with each other, so there is no reason for you to care where I live."

She faltered a bit, but held tight to whatever mission of condescension she was on. "I know that I don't work at the Rock anymore, Sasha, but I do still care about you. I just wanted to tell you that there are no hard feelings. I realize now why you were so stressed out and I don't resent you for lashing out at me. I understand."

"Well I'm glad that you understand, Summer, because I don't. What the hell are you talking about?"

"I didn't know that Payson was sick," she said by way of explanation. He just wasn't sure what that was supposed to explain. "I understand now why you and Kim were so sensitive about my concern. You were just worried and stressed, and it's normal to say things that you don't mean in situations like that. I don't resent what you said to me."

Was she seriously delusional enough to think that he fired her because he was stressed out about Payson's illness? He was about to set her straight and let her know _exactly_ why he fired her, in minute detail, when he was interrupted.

"Sasha? You were supposed to wake me up at…" Payson trailed off as she took in the situation she'd just walked into.

He wanted to laugh. He and Payson couldn't have staged this to look any worse. She was standing in the doorway of the bedroom with tousled hair and wearing nothing but his shirt, and just in case that wasn't incriminating enough, she had a hickey on her neck. She'd come back from lunch with it the day before, after she and Austin mysteriously disappeared together, and he'd been making fun of her ever since. The make up covering it must have rubbed off while she slept, because it was clear as day now, and Summer was staring at it.

"Payson?" the woman asked, "Wha… you… why… What's going on here?"

"What does it look like, Summer?" Payson asked. Curiosity, not sarcasm, like she wasn't sure what Summer could possibly think was wrong. She was brilliant at head games, even better than Kelly when she chose to be.

Rather than answer, Summer asked, "What about Austin? The two of you have been all over the news together."

"Oh, he'll be joining us soon," Payson said. "He should be here any minute."

Sasha didn't love the fact that Payson had just implicated him in a ménage à trois with another man, but Summer's reaction was bloody hilarious. She was horrified. Sasha, partly to put an end to whatever evil plan Payson was coming up with and partly to screw with his ex-girlfriend's head, moved to where Payson was standing. He kissed her and whispered, "I'll tell you about it later." Outloud he said, "You should go get ready. I'll send Austin back to you when he gets here."

He amused himself by imagining what Summer might think Payson needed to do to 'get ready' for a threesome. It was disturbing and funny at the same time.

"Sasha, what the hell is going on here?" Summer asked as soon as Payson disappeared into the bedroom again. He crowed at the fact that he made her swear.

"It's none of your business, Summer, and since you wouldn't believe the truth anyway, I don't think I'm going to bother to explain. So you can believe whatever you want to about why Payson is sleeping in my bed, and I can guarantee you that it will be wrong."

She didn't seem to hear a word he said. "So all that time those rumors about the two of you were true? Was this going on while we were dating? I always knew there was something wrong with the way you looked at her and talked about her, but I convinced myself that I was wrong. I thought you were a better man than this, Sasha."

He bristled. "You thought I was a _different_ man. You were so busy trying to convert me to your beliefs that you never bothered to figure out who I am. If you knew me at all, you would never make these accusations."

She opened her mouth to spew more hypocrisy, but a knock on the door interrupted her. "Come in," Sasha called. He was glad for the interruption.

Austin strolled through the door and stopped dead in his tracks when he noticed the scene in front of him. Sasha saved him the trouble of coming up with something to say by speaking first. "Payson's not ready yet. I forgot to wake her up so she's running a little late."

"Uh, okay," the younger man said, clearly confused. "I'll just take her bags out to the car, then. You two keep doing whatever you were doing."

Austin picked up the suitcase and travel bag that were sitting by the door and left. Summer stared after him. "What's going on here?" she asked again.

"Absolutely nothing that you _think_ is going on. Payson and Austin are going to New York for the weekend. End of story."

They were still standing in awkward silence when Austin got back from his car. He looked between them and asked, in typical Austin Tucker fashion, "Is there something going on that I should know about?"

"No, Summer was just visiting," Sasha said. There was an unspoken communication there, as well. _Don't worry, you'll find out in a little while. I'll tell Payson and she'll tell you. _"Payson's in the bedroom if you want to wait for her there."

"No need," said Payson as she walked into the living room. "I'm ready now. Hey, babe." She slipped her arms around Austin's shoulders and kissed him. The funny thing was that it wasn't even for show. That was just the way she greeted Austin, and the fact that it bothered Summer was a bonus.

Next Payson kissed Sasha and promised, "I'll call you when we land. And be careful packing. I don't want you to screw up your knee again because you tried to move something that was too heavy."

"I'm thirty two, Payson, not ninety two," he said. "My knee will be fine."

"Then don't come crying to me when you end up on crutches." She left, and he was relieved to see her go because he was afraid that Summer would notice that Payson was pregnant. Her loose floral dress barely concealed her stomach. If you knew what to look for, she looked every bit as pregnant as she was. The door had barely closed behind the couple when it opened again, though. Payson stepped back in and said, "You know, Summer, there is something that I've wanted to say to you for a long time, but I never did because I didn't want to hurt Lauren. But since you didn't give her a second thought after you got fired, I don't feel guilty about this now. You're a hypocrite. You claim to be a Christian but you don't live the lifestyle at all, and really you give Christianity a bad name. You're a modern day Pharisee, and Jesus had some pretty particular things to say about them. Look it up."

She left again, for good this time, and Summer stared after her. Sasha gave Austin some time to get out of the parking lot and then opened the door again. "I think Payson said just about everything there is to say. Goodbye Summer."

She was too shocked to reply or argue, so she just walked out. He slammed the door behind her and hoped that it was the last time he would ever see Summer Van Horne.

* * *

><p>AN: It's just too much fun to mess with Summer. She really is such a Pharisee, and I honestly believe that Jesus does not want this character representing his name.

There are some new pics on the Amor Fati board on pinterest. There is one of Jess Torres, the original Heart Truth dress, the dress it got changed to, and the dress Payson was wearing when Summer came over.

Here's the DL on what's going on with this story… I'm like 10k words from finishing it and totally blocked. I had hoped to finish this weekend but that didn't happen, so the hope now is sometime this week. When it's done I'm gonna give ya'll massive chapters every other day for a few weeks. I'm hoping for some inspiration in the form of reviews, which has definitely worked before to unblock me. Help me get the creative juices flowing!


	72. Chapter 72

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

A/N: Thanks to all the people who reminded me that I was overdue! As an apology I'll give you and extra-long chapter :)

Just to dangle some catnip in front of you… ya'll are going to _**LOVE**_next chapter.

* * *

><p>Sasha signed the last page with a flourish and handed it to Payson to sign as well. It was like realtors were determined to take all the excitement out of buying a house by making the process as long and boring as possible. His hand was cramping with the effort of signing and initialing so many papers, but it was worth it when Samantha Roberts handed him and Payson each a set of keys to their new home. He hadn't had a place to really call home since his mum passed away fourteen years ago, and it was even better that it was with Payson.<p>

He was going out to a long lunch with the Keelers, Tuckers, and Nicky Russo, and by the time they finished their house should be full of furniture and boxes. The real estate company agreed to let the decorator Payson hired into the house early this morning, so she had been there with a team of workers for several hours already, and movers were currently in the process of loading all of their boxes into a van to tow to the new house. Payson was excited to have her full wardrobe available again; she, her mom, and Becca spent a few days last week packing up her bedroom at the Keeler house, and the moving crew was taking that to the house as well.

They met the others at a hole in the wall Italian restaurant where they took up nearly half the dining area. Payson greeted Austin with a kiss, which was much tamer than the ones they always shared at the Olympics. London had been the height of their physical relationship, and while she still spent a couple of nights a week and all her weekends with him, as well as the occasional nooner, things had cooled down between them. They were on the accelerated track of a normal relationship, and they'd moved past the initial burst of passion and into familiar comfort.

After they sat down, Austin handed a thick manila envelope to Payson and said, "A courier dropped these off at the gym this morning. Which, by the way, the Rock is chaotic without you guys."

Sasha didn't believe him for a second. "How can it possibly be chaotic on a Tuesday morning? Nobody but the elites train during the school day and nine of them have retired or left for college this past month. So that leaves what, thirteen gymnasts there this morning?"

"Fifteen," Payson corrected, "since Jess and Becca just started homeschooling."

"And Austin is totally right," Becca said. "It was crazy there this morning. People were running amok."

Payson was busy opening up the courier envelope, but she was never too busy to bug her little sister. "Really, Becs, amok? Did you get a word of the day calendar or something?"

Becca stuck her tongue out at her sister. "Just because _your_ vocabulary is boring doesn't mean _mine_ has to be."

"Supercalifragilisticexpialid ocious," Payson deadpanned, but then she pulled the contents out of the package in her hand and her neutral expression was replaced by raised eyebrows and an 'O' shaped mouth. "Wow."

"What is it?" Ava asked. She walked around to stand beside Payson and said, "Wow's right. Damn, girl, you look hot."

Payson explained. "It's the proofs for the Body Issue."

"Let's see them," Austin said. He cleared off a space in the center of the table for her to set down the pictures. Payson warned her dad that he might not want to see them, and Mark accepted the wisdom in that suggestion and went to the bathroom while Payson displayed the pictures one by one.

The first was of Payson on the beam, bent backward over her leg in the pose that people called The Payson. It was taken from an angle so that her whole body was in silhouette and the arch of her back was accentuated. Ava was right; she looked hot in that picture.

Payson put down the second one and said, "There is a note that says this is going to be one of the cover shots." It was her upside down in the air and midtwist on what was probably her two and a half. You could see the side of her body from head to toe, but she was twisted in a way that covered any more explicit areas.

"How did they get the picture at just the right time like that?" Sasha asked. Her body would be at that particular angle for just a split second during that salto—less, really—and there was no way it was caught by luck.

"It's a high speed camera. It takes some insane number of frames per second so that I could basically take a bunch of those pictures and play them back like a movie."

Payson sat the next picture beside the others, but this one was of Austin. He was holding himself in an L-cross on the rings, buck naked. Ava, who was now sitting back in her seat, said, "Oh, gag me. I do not need to see my brother like that. Nicky, will you knock me upside the head so that I can forget I ever saw that?"

Nicky thumped her on the head and she thumped him in return. Russo was still quiet and reserved, but Ava was bringing out his personality a little more. They had both moved in with Austin for the time being, and the arrangement was doing all three of them good. They worked well together, kind of like Payson and Sasha did.

There was another picture of Austin, this time doing a tucked backward salto, which Sasha knew was off the vault even though the apparatus was nowhere in the frame. Austin shook his head and said, "I can't believe you talked me into this, Pay. Or more like manipulated me into it."

"Well before you complain too much," she said, "take a look at this one. Apparently they're doing that cover shot of just me and then another one of the two of us together."

When she sat down the photograph, Austin swore and said, "You're dad is going to murder me."

Sasha agreed with the prediction. When Mark saw that picture, he would kill Austin. It wasn't explicit, but the look Austin and Payson were sharing in the picture made the whole thing look sexual. Austin was standing behind Payson with one arm wrapped around her chest and covering her breasts while the other arm was curled around her waist and entwined with hers, and Payson had her head tilted so that she could meet Austin's eyes. The camera must have captured them just as they were about to kiss, because the image gave the impression that they were drawing closer to each other. If the other nude photographs didn't shed Payson of perception of youth, this one sure as hell would.

"Really, Payson?" Kim asked. She'd been supportive of this magazine spread, knowing that it was a well respected magazine and it would help Payson's image, but this one might test her limits. "Did you have to look at him like that? Couldn't you have just smiled?"

"We did!" Payson insisted. "This must have been candid, because the actual shoot was all of us smiling. The photographer must have caught us when we were just talking."

Becca picked the print up and examined it closer. "You don't look like you're doing much talking here," she said.

"Shut up," Payson responded. Very eloquent. She sat one more picture down and said, "This is the last one, and it's more like what the couple pictures were supposed to be. Cute and funny rather than sexy."

Payson said 'cute and funny.' Sasha said 'awkward.' There was way too much of Austin showing and not enough of Payson. All you could see of her was her head, arms, and feet, whereas the only part of Austin that you _couldn't_ see was the part that Payson's feet were covering.

She said that picture was the last one, but there were still a stack of glossy papers in her hand. "So what are those?" Becca asked.

Payson blushed. "These aren't for the magazine. They're for me and Austin. The photographer did some shots of the two of us just for fun and said he would send them to us."

"When you say shots of the two of you, do you mean porn?"

Payson glared at Ava. "No. They're just a little sexier than what the rest of them were. More like the first one I showed you than the second one."

Sasha was sure that the two girls would have continued their banter is Mark's voice hadn't floated across the room. "Is it safe for me to come back now?"

"Oh, uh, yeah," Payson said. "Just give me a sec to put these up." She collected all the pictures and slid them back into the envelope, safely away from her father's eyesight.

The meal was uneventful after that, aside from quite a bit of banter between Ava and, well, everybody else. Ava Tucker was as bad as Lauren Tanner, maybe even worse, and when you put her in the same room as Payson, Becca, and Austin who all had strong personalities, there was always something entertaining happening.

When lunch was over, Payson hugged everybody and promised to be back at the gym by the time the Level 10s arrived at four, and then it was off to the house. _Their_ house.

He let Payson have the honor of opening the door for the first time. It would have been more special, he thought, to unlock the door for the first time, but it was already unlocked so that the decorating crew could come in and out.

When they stepped inside, Sasha couldn't believe his eyes. The rooms that he could see looked lived in already. It was amazing how much work a crew of twenty people could do in one morning. The walls were painted, the furniture arranged, and boxes of his and Payson's personal items stacked in the appropriate rooms. At this rate they would be able to move in within days.

Payson had a huge smile on her face as they walked through the house, exploring each room. He could tell that she longed to set up her kitchen and start putting out their picture frames to make everything more personal, but she had a mission. She saved one room 'til last, and it was the only one with no work being done by the decorators: the nursery.

She wanted to decorate the nursery herself, so the only thing that the workers did was paint blue and white stripes on the walls and a starburst pattern on the ceiling to give the illusion of a big top circus tent to go with the circus blanket he gave her for her birthday. Everything that belonged to the room was sitting in boxes and bags on the floor, waiting for the family to put together.

They had just a few hours in the house until they had to be at the gym. While the elite gymnasts trained from eight to five, the non-elite classes didn't start until school was out and lasted well into the evening. Sasha could skive off those classes occasionally, because he didn't direct teach any of them, but Payson had to be there. She was the head coach for level eight and up, and she would follow those girls through the ranks and into junior elites, while Sasha stayed the head coach for the senior elites and the current junior elites. They would essentially tag-team the gym, with Payson teaching the gymnasts the skills and self-confidence to handle his intense training at the highest levels.

"You have class in three hours," he reminded her, "so we won't be able to get much set up. What do you want to do first?"

"The crib," she said, without the slightest bit of hesitation. "Let's put the crib together."

So they sat on the floor together and assembled the cot, which was harder than he thought it would be. He'd hand-crafted furniture that was easier than this with all its bloody screws and pegs and allan wrenches. It was worth it when they were finished, though, just to see Payson's awe. She ran her hands across the wooden rails and slats, and he could tell that she was already imagining her child asleep in there. She turned to Sasha and sank into his arms. They stood like that for as long as possible, until they finally had no choice but to leave. As they stepped out of the room, Payson caught his hand and squeezed it. "I'm so, so happy, Sasha."

Walking into the gym was the last stop on a roller coaster day. It went from exciting in the morning, to boring during the closing, back to exciting during lunch, emotional at the house, and now downright funny. Two magazines were circulating around the Rock, both of which hit the stands that day: Cosmopolitan, which featured Payson on the cover and an interview inside, and OK! magazine, which was filled with pictures of her at Beyonce's party and the Heart Truth fashion show. The whole gym was tittering about it. They'd seen her in magazines before, of course, and they knew that she won five gold medals in London a few weeks ago, but now they had another thing to add to the list of intimidating things about Payson Keeler, which was probably even more intimidating to the younger girls than the medals: their coach was a model. Literally, a model. The expression in their eyes as they looked up from the pages was so full of hero worship that Sasha had to excuse himself to the office so that he could laugh.

If there was any doubt before, there certainly wasn't now. Sasha Belov had officially been replaced as the most impressive person in the gym.

o-O-o

There was an angry parent blocking Sasha's path across the gym. The week had started off so well, with him and Payson finally settled into the new house and her last blood test showing that her blood levels were finally starting to_ increase_ rather than just not decreasing. They'd all been walking on a bit of a cloud the past few days, but this mum was about to pull Sasha back down to earth.

"I don't want my daughter being taught by a girl like that. She's a bad influence."

Damnit. They all knew this was coming, that there would be uptight parents who didn't want their kids to train with a pregnant teenager, but he didn't think it would be this soon. At sixteen weeks Payson was starting to get pretty big, but he could barely even tell when she was wearing her baggy gym clothes. If he couldn't tell when he already knew the belly was there, nobody else should be able to tell either. He wouldn't give away his hand, though, because the woman might not be talking about the pregnancy. MJ leaked the Body Issue pictures last week, and that could be the reason that Payson was 'a bad influence.'

"I'm sorry," he said, all charm, "but I'm not following. What are you talking about?"

Apparently the British accent didn't do it for this woman. "Don't play stupid with me. I've had four kids, I can recognize a pregnant woman when I see one. Just because she's trying to cover it up doesn't mean that it'll work. What are you all going to do when she's three or four months along and you can't hide it anymore? How are you going to explain that to the children?"

Those words probably had a different effect than she was hoping for: Sasha was relieved. MJ said that it was important that people not realize how far along Payson was, and this woman said 'when she's three or four months along,' as if it were a point in the future. Payson was actually halfway through her third month already.

"There is nothing to explain," he said, and he was telling the truth. This was a gym, not a bloody sex ed class. The only thing that mattered was gymnastics.

"Pretend all you want, Coach Belov, but I won't have her teaching my daughter."

He smiled wide, as if he wasn't boiling mad, and said, "Of course we won't force her to work with a coach that you're uncomfortable with. I'd be happy to refund the dues you've paid for this month. Prorated, of course." Like hell was he giving her back the entire month's dues when her kid had already had three weeks of training for them.

The mother was incensed. Judging by her expression, she probably thought that he would fire Payson rather than invite her and her child to leave the gym. He hated to do that to the poor kid, because that meant depriving her of Payson's expert coaching skills, but there was no choice.

"Fine," the woman huffed. "I'll be by in the morning to pick up a check from you. And I expect today to be included in the refund since Tabitha won't be finishing the lesson."

Double damnit. He didn't realize that this was Tabitha Wood's mother. It didn't make a difference, really, but Tabitha was one of their best level eights and it would be a pity to lose her.

Mrs. Wood swung around and snapped at her daughter, "Tabitha! Get your stuff, we're leaving."

Sasha passed the young girl as she made her way to her mum and he made his way to Payson. She was confused and upset at being called out by her mum.

He stopped to stand beside Payson, who whispered, "Casualty number one?"

"Looks like."

Payson sighed. "Well, it was only a matter of time, and I'm sure she won't be the last. I just hope that Jess's mom won't react this way."

"I'd be surprised if she did. She seems like a nice woman; a lot like your mum, actually."

Tabitha was arguing with her mother. She had spunk to stand up to her mum like that, which made it even more unfortunate that she was leaving the gym. Natural talent and a fiery personality was a good combination in gymnastics.

The other level eights were watching the argument, so Payson called them back to task, but in a much kinder way than Sasha would have. "You're here to train, not to gossip," she said. "You can either practice your ring leaps like you're supposed to or you can start a conditioning circuit."

The threat of conditioning worked at any age, and the kids went back to work, taking turns on the tape, low beam, and high beam while Payson kept an eye out and made occasional suggestions.

"Should we even bother to keep it quiet now?" she asked between critiques. "You know what the gossip is like here. If one person knows it won't be long until they all know. Maybe I should just sit the parents down and tell them all at once rather than deal with the fallout on an individual basis."

"MJ said not to confirm or deny," he reminded her.

"I know, I just… I don't want to have to deal with a new kid being pulled out of my class every other day. It would be easier to let it all happen at once. And who knows, maybe the parents will handle it better if I'm just honest about it."

"They could talk to the press, though."

"So could Mrs. Wood."

She was probably the kind to do it, too. "That would just be speculation, though. She doesn't know anything for sure."

Payson snorted. "You think the press cares? They don't need proof, all they need is a rumor."

"It's your decision, Pay. I'm not sure this is a good idea, but whatever you want to do, I'll support you."

She paused to consider. "I think I want to tell them. I'm so tired of keeping secrets."

That was something he understood. It was exhausting trying to hide things from the rest of the world, and she'd been doing it now for months. It started out with not being honest about her fear at Nationals, which led to her hiding her traumatic first time with Austin, and then keeping the pregnancy a secret, and then her illness… the secrets were spiraling out of control. He understood her needing to come clean. "Okay. Do you want to do it now? All of your J.O. classes are here now, so the parents should be in the waiting room." The level 9 and 10 classes were working with Tara on strength training while Payson ran the level 8 class, but they were all at the gym.

"Yeah, it's better to get it over with, I guess. I need to talk to Austin, though. Can you go get my mom while I talk to him?"

They waved over one of the assistant coaches to take over the class, then Payson headed toward the annex to speak with Austin while he went to the office to get Kim.

Kim looked up when he came into the room and, as usual, could tell that something was on his mind. "What's up?" she asked.

"Tabitha Wood's mum just pulled her out of the gym." He didn't need to explain why.

"Oh no," Kim said. "That's such a shame. Is Payson upset?"

"A little, I think, but she's been expecting this. She wants to pull all of the parents right now and tell them at once so we don't have to keep dealing with this over the next few weeks."

She frowned. "Is that a good idea?"

"Probably not, but she's tired of lying. It would be less stressful on her this way. Right now it's like she's waiting for the other shoe to drop."

Kim leaned back in her chair with a sigh. "I feel so useless here, Sasha. I know she's grown up now, but I can't help wanting to take care of her, and this just isn't something I can help with. I wish that I could make this easier for her."

"You can," he said. "Just by being there. Telling the other parents will be easier if you're there to support her."

"One of these days you'll understand how hard that is," she said, wagging her finger at him. "When you have kids of your own, you'll realize how hard it is to just sit back and _support_ when you want to be protecting them."

Her words conjured images of tow-headed children running around his back yard, but the thought was interrupted before it could be fully formed. Payson poked her head into the office and asked, "Are you guys ready?"

He and Kim followed her downstairs to the observation room. "If you have a child that's a level 8, 9, or 10," he heard Payson say, "I'd like to speak with you in the conference room."

A long line of people followed her out of the viewing area, leaving the room almost empty. Only the level 8s and above trained on Wednesday evenings, so the elite parents were the only ones to stay behind.

She waited until they were all seated before she started. Sasha leaned against the back wall to listen and intervene if needed, and Kim stood next to him, too rigid to lean on the wall.

"You all probably noticed that Tabitha Wood is leaving the Rock," Payson said. He wasn't sure if she was trying to make a point by alluding to the gym's notorious love of gossip. "And I think that as parents you have a right to know why. Mrs. Wood doesn't think that I am a suitable teacher." The sarcasm on the term 'suitable teacher' was probably unintentional. Beside him, Kim bristled.

"Becky Wood is a blowhard," one of the moms said, which made Sasha laugh. She must be Zoe Reynolds mother; they were alike in both looks and personality. She continued, "Maybe if she got a little more action she wouldn't be so upset that you're getting it."

Anyone else might miss it, but Sasha could tell that Payson was trying hard not to smile. "That's really not what the problem is, Mrs. Reynolds. If it was she would have pulled Tabitha out a long time ago. Austin and I haven't exactly been discreet."

Mrs. Reynolds snorted. "Believe me, hon, we all know you haven't. And it would be that lack of discretion that led to your current predicament, right?"

Payson blushed. The older woman wasn't saying these things out of spite or contempt, she just didn't seem to have filters. She was the grown-up version of Lauren.

Before Payson could respond, one of the fathers spoke up. "Obviously I'm missing something here. What's going on?"

Payson laid her hand on her stomach in a protective gesture and confessed, "I'm pregnant. I hadn't planned to make it public quite yet, but some of the women"—she nodded her head toward Mrs. Reynolds—"have obviously figured it out, so I wanted to be upfront with you all and give you a chance to express any concerns you might have."

There was a long pause, and then, "Who's going to teach your classes when you're out on maternity leave?"

Sasha was expecting something along the lines of 'you're setting a bad example for our children,' so the question threw him. It threw Payson, too, but she responded, "I haven't even considered it yet. We're still a long way out from that, but probably we will go back to the old schedule with the assistant coaches for a little while."

"What about Jess?" Carmen Torres asked. "I don't like the idea of her switching coaches right before her elite qualifier."

"It shouldn't be a problem, Mrs. Torres. Her qualifier is long before I'm due." It was actually only two weeks before she was due, but the parents didn't need to know that. "And if something was to happen, she would work with Sasha. We consider Jess an elite now, not a level ten, so she's going to get elite training."

"What are you going to tell the kids?" someone asked. "You're their hero. Michelle has posters of you hanging all over her room, she wants to be just like you. And no offense, but this is not a path that I want her following you down."

Sasha was kind of offended, but Payson didn't seem to be. "Honestly, I don't plan to tell them anything. They're here for gymnastics, and my pregnancy has nothing to do with that. If they ask questions, I'll tell them the truth, but I'm not going to sit them down and give them the sex talk. That's your job."

"Let's give our kids a little credit," Mrs. Reynolds said. "They're not robots who follow Payson around blindly. They do actually have minds of their own."

The meeting delved into chaos after that. There were parents who supported Payson, parents who were concerned about the influence she would have on their kids, and parents who could care less as long as their children were still getting gymnastics lessons. Henrietta Dashelet, the mother of Becca's best friend, was the predominant voice of reason in the room. Payson barely even spoke; she just let everyone argue amongst themselves.

About a half hour in, Jess's mum stood up and said, "This is ridiculous. You're all worried about Payson being a bad influence, but the way I see it she's living the way I would want Jess to live, by accepting the consequences of her actions and not trying to shirk her responsibilities. She's not the first person to get pregnant on accident and she certainly won't be the last, so let's stop making this into a crisis. The only question that matters here is whether or not she's a good coach, and I think we all know the answer to that."

Mrs. Torres left, and shortly after Austin slipped into the conference room. "How are things going?" he whispered to Kim.

"Well, I'm re-evaluating my opinion of a few people in here," she answered, "but I don't think it's too bad. It could have been a lot worse."

"It helps that Carmen Torres is on board," Austin said. "Everybody knows that Jess is Olympic track, so Carmen is sort of the queen of the parents. They all want to be on her side."

He was right. At every gym there was one mum that lead the pack, whether by choice or not, and it was usually the mum of the best girl. Or the richest one. Kim was spared much of the fawning because the Tanners and Cruzes were richer and more open to the attention, but Jess was the only Rock girl currently on the Olympic track, so Carmen Torres was a force within the gym.

"How did you know that she was okay with this?" Sasha asked.

"She came to talk to me on her way back downstairs just now. She said congratulations and warned me that winning Olympic medals was easy compared to raising a baby."

"That's a fact," said Kim. "_Especially_ if your baby is trying to win Olympic medals."

At the front of the room, Payson finally put an end to the arguing. "That's enough. We aren't accomplishing anything here, so there is no point in continuing the discussion. You can each decide for yourself what's best for your child. But I do have to ask you to please respect my privacy. Austin and I would like to tell people about the baby in our own time and our own terms, so please don't speak to the media about my private life."

Payson took Austin's hand on the way out and led him away, probably to somewhere where she would be free to let down her walls. Sasha and Austin were the only people she ever allowed herself to break down in front of now.

In the end, six more parents pulled their children out of the Rock, which was better than they had ever dared hope. Seven people out of three classes was barely a dent, and Tabitha was the only one who was a real hit to the gym. The other six were solid gymnasts but not medal winners, and they wouldn't be missed much as far as the Rock's competitive reputation went. It looked like being coached by the greatest gymnast the sport had ever seen was too much of an incentive for people to give up.

All in all, it went better than Sasha expected, but that didn't mean that Payson wouldn't be upset about it anyway.

o-O-o

Payson led Austin to the file room and locked the door behind them, and then sank into his arms. "I know I told you not to come," she said, "but I'm glad you did."

She said that she wanted it to be a professional meeting, not a confession of some wrong doing, so he should just keep training like everything was normal. He tried to do as she said, but with very little success. He couldn't concentrate to train, so he stood by the stairs leading to the conference room and waited for her. When Carmen Torres came out and spoke to him, he couldn't wait any longer.

"Are you alright?" he asked.

"Yeah, I'm fine." She lifted her lips to his for quick kiss, and it was casual enough for him to know that she was telling the truth. When she was upset her kisses were usually desperate. "It sucks, but I was expecting it. I just needed a moment to escape."

"Do you want to go home?"

"No. I still have classes to teach, so I have to be here 'til seven, but I can steal a few minutes away to spend with you. I'm relaxing already, just being in your arms."

"Yeah, I have magic arms," he teased. "They make stress go away. I have magic other parts, too."

She laughed. "Definitely magic other parts. But I'm happy with just your arms right now. I love how strong you are. It makes me feel so safe."

"I'll always keep you safe, Pay." He said the sappiest things when he was around her, but he couldn't help it.

"I know," she said, and then closed her eyes and snuggled closer to him, which was getting harder by the day. Cuddling wasn't easy when there was a large baby bump to get in the way, and it had even changed the way they slept. They used to sleep on their sides facing each other, but recently he started spooning her instead so that they could still be touching during the night.

Payson reached for one of his hands and slid it around to rest on her stomach. "I know I'm probably imagining it," she said, "but sometimes I swear I can feel him move."

"How long do you think it will be before I can feel him?" he asked. He couldn't wait for the day that he could feel his son kick.

"Sorry, babe, but I think it will be a couple more months. I don't think _I'm_ even really feeling him yet, I think I just in my head, and from what I've read you won't be able to feel him until a few weeks after I start to. But it's going so fast that it will feel like no time."

"It is," he agreed. "I can't believe it's been more than two months since we found out."

"You know, I could never have imagined this back then, being here with you. Now I can't imagine my life without you."

"I don't think I've ever imagined my life without you, Pay."

She kissed him again and promised, "Now you'll never have to. You have me forever."

He wouldn't have her like this forever and they both knew it, but he would still always have her. They had a connection that most married couples would never reach, and that wasn't going to end when they stopped sleeping together. Payson was right; they had each other forever.

* * *

><p>AN: Still no news on finishing this thing :( I'm getting there, slowly but surely. I think I wrote about 1,000 words last night. It should be soon.


	73. Chapter 73

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

A/N: At long last, the scene that inspired this entire fic…

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><p>Something had been different about their lovemaking lately, and Austin couldn't figure out what it was. For one thing, it was more frequent, more like it was during the Olympics when they couldn't keep their hands off each other. Payson had spent every night with him for a week, and they never just slept. He could barely keep her satisfied. He hardly had time to pull out of her before she was pushing his hand down her body and begging him for more. They spent most of their nights at her house because Sasha, at the very least, didn't comment on the constant screams coming from their bedroom. Ava wasn't quite as tactful.<p>

There was something else, too, and it was the part that bothered him. There was an edginess to their sex that wasn't there before, a desperation that he didn't understand, and it didn't just come from Payson. He found himself seeking her out during the day, or rushing through dinner so they could get upstairs to be together. A couple of times they didn't even make it to the bedroom and ended up making love in the kitchen, which was awkward as they both lived in shared houses, but it felt like the world might end if they couldn't be together _right then_.

It was Saturday and they were at a movie premiere, but Austin wasn't even sure what movie it was for. He had very few memories of walking the red carpet except the fact that Payson was subtly pressing her body against his and using her flowing black dress as a shield to hide the fact that she was rubbing her calf up and down his leg whenever they stood still. He wouldn't doubt that some photographer got a picture of him with a hard on before Payson had the decency to walk in front of him. Of course, that brought a whole new set of problems, because the new position allowed her to press her ass against him when they posed for pictures.

As soon as the lights were down in the theatre, they were all over each other. If it was less crowded and she was wearing a shorter dress they would have fooled around—actually, it was a good thing that she was wearing a long dress, because they both riled up enough that the crowd alone might not have been enough of a deterrent—but as it was they stuck to making out. He hadn't spent that long just kissing someone in years.

Once they were in the limo headed back to the hotel, they made up for their relative innocence in the theatre. Austin vaguely remembered hearing horror stories about hidden cameras in the back of limos, and he sure as hell hoped there wasn't one watching them. MJ wanted to get rid of Payson's All American Girl image, but a video of what they were doing now was probably going too far in the other direction.

The walk from the car up to their hotel room seemed endless, and every second that he had to go without touching her was torture, but when they got there things changed. They went from horny movie theatre/back seat of the car kind of sex to truly making love. It was the best they'd ever had, the best he'd ever had with _anyone_, but as they laid curled together afterward realization crashed into him. He finally understood what was so different about their sex lately.

They were saying goodbye.

"Payson," he rasped, unable to say anything more. It was like his chest had been ripped open and his heart pulled out. How had this happened? They were so happy together, how could things have ended like this? It was supposed to fade away gradually, not suddenly end without them realizing it. They couldn't go from happy to over in just a few seconds.

"No," Payson said, pulling away. Tears filled her eyes and that was the only confirmation that he needed. She felt it too. "Don't, Austin. I'm not ready."

"Neither am I. I don't think I'll ever be ready." _But it's still over._

"Then we don't have to do it," she insisted, crying harder. "If we're not ready then we shouldn't end this. Nothing has to change."

He wanted her to be right. He wanted her to be right more than anything in the world. He would give up everything he owned and every medal he'd ever won to stay with her, but he knew that it didn't work that way. Their future was more important than the pain they felt right now. "But everything has changed already, Payson. We wouldn't be having this conversation if we didn't both feel it. If we try to hang on to something that isn't there anymore we could ruin what's left. We could lose our chance to be a family."

"No, you're wrong. It's not over. We're not going to ruin anything. We can be a family and get married and have a brother or sister for Alex one day…" Her voice trailed off into sobs, and Austin felt tears start to fall from his own eyes. She was offering him his greatest desires, and it was so tempting to believe that it could happen. It was killing him to say no.

They always knew that it would end one day. He just didn't expect it to be so sudden, and he didn't expect to have to be strong for both of them. He didn't want it to end anymore than Payson did, but he couldn't let them make a mistake that they would regret later in life. "It can't happen, Payson. I want it to, but it can't."

Then she uttered the words that almost broke him: "It can't end. I love you."

It was a wrecking ball to the chest. He knew she loved him, had probably known longer than _she_ knew, but this was the first time she said it. He had waited for so long to hear those words, and it was so unfair to hear them for the first time when they were breaking up. He wasn't ready for this, either. He wanted more time, but since he couldn't have it all he did was say "I love you, too," and hold Payson while she cried.

She wept for hours before she finally fell into a fitful doze. He couldn't sleep at all, not when he knew that this might be his last chance to watch Payson sleep. He was devastated; he wanted to scream and cry and refuse to let her go, but he had to be strong because she _couldn't_ be right now. He kept reminding himself that they still had a future, just not as lovers, but it wasn't very comforting at the moment. The wound was too raw.

The sky was starting to lighten when Payson woke again, and they made love for the last time while the sun rose outside their window. There was something symbolic about it, like maybe this was a beginning rather than an end, but it didn't hurt any less.

Payson brushed away his tears and said, "I don't know where to go from here. What do we do next?"

"We go home. This isn't the end of us," he promised. "It's just a change. You're not ever going to lose me."

"I love you, Austin," she said again.

"And I love you, Payson. I always have. I always will."

o-O-o

Sasha knew that something was wrong as soon as Payson and Austin stepped through the front door, but he didn't know what it was. There was just something different about the way Payson was carrying herself, and there was definitely something different in the fact that Austin didn't come inside. Normally when they got back from a publicity trip he came in and hung out for a few hours, occasionally even staying the night, but today he stood at the door and kissed her goodbye.

Sasha heard the whispered "I love you"s, and he was certain that was new. They had never said those words before, and it worried him to hear such a monumental statement when something was so clearly wrong.

He waited in the entrance to their living room until Austin left, and then stepped forward to give her whatever support she needed. She took two lunging steps toward him and burst into tears while he wrapped her in a tight hug. She was crying too hard to speak, so he picked her up and carried her to the couch. He held her for an hour before she could manage to tell him that she and Austin broke up while they were in LA, and it was another hour before she was calm enough to discuss it.

"I'm such an idiot," she cried. "I went into this with my eyes open, I knew it would end. I just didn't think it would hurt this bad."

"You're not an idiot, Pay. You're young. You don't have any experience in a relationship like this. Everybody gets hurt when they break up with their first love. But you don't regret it, right?"

"Of course not! I could never regret being with Austin."

"Then that's all that matters," he said. "It's going to hurt for a while, but everything worth it does. How many times have you been hurt in gymnastics? But that never stopped you from doing it."

"When will it get better?" she asked. She sounded so lost, and it was times like this when Sasha remembered just how young Payson was. She grew up so fast as a professional athlete, and now as a young mother, that it was easy to forget that she had very little life experience. Austin was only her second real boyfriend, the first that she'd slept with, and the first that she'd really loved. Max had been teenage infatuation, but Austin had been the real deal for her, despite the bad beginning. Under normal circumstances it might have taken her months to move past this, but with the baby and the kind of relationship that she and Austin had, Sasha hoped they could settle into a new normal soon.

"I don't know, but I know that it _will_ get better. You and Austin are different than most couples, so you'll be able to figure out a way to make this work."

She made a visible effort to calm down. "That's what Austin said. And I know it true, but I just can't see it right now. I don't know how I'm going to be able to see him without hurting."

"It will happen," he promised. "Just give a little time, and then the next time you see him you'll remember that you love him and you're having a baby with him, and that will be all that matters."

He believed what he was saying, even though he'd never experienced it himself. All of Sasha's break ups had been bad, but he never had the kind of relationship that Payson and Austin had, either. They had been forged by fire, with possibly one of the worst starts to a relationship ever, and the pregnancy, and then Payson being sick and the drama of the Olympics. No two people could go through all that together and not have a bond that lasts forever.

He let her wallow for the rest of the day. She watched TV and did some half-hearted paperwork for the gym, but didn't do much else. It wasn't her usual behavior, nor something he would encourage under normal circumstances, but she needed a time to just grieve.

She went to bed early and he went with her. He didn't always sleep with her, but it happened often enough that he knew when she needed support and when she needed to be alone, and tonight she needed him to be with her. Spending the night alone would only emphasize the fact that Austin wouldn't be sharing her bed anymore.

She was more herself the next morning, simply by merit of having had time to process, and Sasha was certain that work would help her. She loved coaching, and focusing on someone else for a while would be good for her. He just didn't take her mum into consideration.

He and Payson were in the office sorting out some information for an invitational at the Parkettes gym coming up in just over a month. It was a bold move by the Parkettes to re-establish themselves as a top gym after not having any girls qualify for the Olympics. It would work, too, since there was no way the Rock could win after all of their best girls retired. It wouldn't do the Rock any harm, though. Their reputation was cemented after London.

When Kim came into the office, she was her normal cheerful self. She sat down coffee for them, kissed Payson on the head, and asked, "How was LA? Did you have fun?"

"It was fine," Payson said. It was impossible to miss how dead her voice sounded, and Kim threw Sasha a concerned look.

"What happened, sweetie? You aren't feeling sick again, are you?"

"No, I'm fine. I'm just ready to get back to work. You know how much I hate doing publicity stuff." She gathered up some papers and told Sasha, "I'll need the floor for most of the morning with Becs and Jess, but it should be free for the elites in the afternoon."

Payson kissed him and left, and she was barely out the door before Kim turned to him and asked, "What happened, Sasha? I haven't seen her like this in months, not since the last time she got bad news about her bloodwork."

He was surprised that Payson wasn't upfront with her mum, but he guessed that just spoke to how hard this was for her. She couldn't bear to say the words, so Sasha said them for her. "She and Austin broke up while they were in California."

"What?" Kim sat down in shock. "Why, what happened?"

"Nothing happened," he explained. "They were just over. She's upset, but she's not surprised. They both knew this was coming."

"Well, _I_ didn't know it. This doesn't make any sense, they were so happy together. I thought they were going to work things out."

He wasn't sure if Kim actually believed that or if she'd been willfully deluding herself, but Payson and Austin never stood a chance as a couple. They burned too hot to last, but they would be great as friends and parents after this. The past few months had all been building toward that, forming a basis for their future. Even without a romantic relationship, they would have a connection that most married couples would never rival.

Sasha tried to reassure Payson's mum. "This is what's best for them, Kim. They aren't right for each other in the long run, and this way they can stay friends without risking it on a relationship gone bad. Honestly, I think very little will change for them besides their physical relationship." This was awkward. When he had this same conversation with Payson he said, "The only thing that's changed is that you won't be having sex anymore," but he couldn't be that blunt with Kim.

Kim sat down and dropped her head into her hands. "Can't anything ever just be _easy_ for her? I know she's chosen hard paths, but it seems like everything is extra hard for her. Why can't she be with her baby's father? Why can't it be that easy?"

He saw what was happening in the gym below and said, "Come watch this. This might not be as hard as you think it is."

Austin was standing in the door searching the room for Payson, and she looked up when he found her as if she could feel his eyes on her. She waited on the floor with her pre-elites while he made his way across the gym. Austin stopped in front of her and there was the slightest pause, and then she sank into a hug. They stood together without speaking for a few minutes before she stood on her toes to kiss him and smiled. And just like Sasha knew it would be, everything was alright between them.

* * *

><p>AN: This story has taken a lot of turns away from the original concept, but the breakup has stayed pretty much the same. Poor Austin :( You have no idea how hard it was for him to be the reasonable one in this situation, but he was right. Their future is better this way. Payson gets Sasha and Austin gets… someone else.

LauraW89 came up with a genius idea for Austin's future and my brain took off with it, but you won't actually see it in this fic because it's going to happen several years in the future. So I'll leave it up to you… do you want me to tell ya'll who Austin will end up with? I'll only tell you if I get an overwhelming number of people asking for it, so if you want to know, leave comments! I especially love hearing from brand new people :)

As usual, thank you zabini :) I don't know what I'd do without you.


	74. Chapter 74

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

A/N: This chapter was so entertaining to research. When my go-to pregnant lady told me about this particular pregnancy symptom, it was too much fun to pass up :)

* * *

><p>Sasha was worried. Not about himself and not about Payson, but rather about them together. There was nothing definite to worry him, but there was a subtle difference. They didn't touch as much, and he hadn't slept with her in over a week. He thought at first that it was just her way of dealing with the breakup with Austin, but it had continued too long, so he was worried.<p>

He didn't sleep well the night before because he kept thinking about what was happening with Payson. If he understood what the problem was he could try to fix it, but he didn't have a clue what was wrong. Why was she so closed off?

He could feel it as soon as he walked into the kitchen. There might as well have been a sign on her back that said "Don't touch me." She tensed as he approached her, so instead or slipping his arms around her waist like he normally would, he brushed his hand against her back and kissed her cheek.

He opened his mouth to say "good morning," but the words got stuck in his throat as he registered Payson's reaction to his touch. _She moaned._

He froze and tried to process what happened. Memories floated to the front of his mind of his mates teasing about how randy their wives were when they were pregnant, and for the first time it occurred to him that Payson might be experiencing the same thing. A few seconds ago he couldn't fathom the reason that Payson wouldn't want him to touch her, but it all made sense now.

He stepped away from her and asked, "Payson, am I making you uncomfortable?" The words seemed familiar, but he wasn't sure where he heard them before.

She sighed. "Yes, but that's not even remotely your fault."

"Why didn't you tell me, Pay?"

"What was I supposed to say, can you please not touch me because I'm horny? This is difficult enough already. I didn't want to drag you into it."

He understood where she was coming from. Things between them could be hard at times anyway, but with Payson feeling this way it would be a million times harder. "Is there anything that I can do to make this easier on you?"

She wrinkled her nose. "Actually, yeah. I know this is stupid, but could you change your cologne? It smells like cedar, and that's always turned me on. If you wore something a little less _me_ that might help."

"Okay, that's easy enough. I really do wish you'd told me earlier, though. I thought something was wrong."

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to worry you. It's just… this isn't new, but now all of a sudden I don't have Austin anymore and I don't know how to handle it, and I didn't want to make you uncomfortable, too."

He didn't know how to handle it either, so he didn't have any words of wisdom for her. Still, he said, "Don't worry about this, Payson. You do whatever you need to do and don't even think about me. I can take it."

"Thank you," she said. She squeezed his hand, which was the first voluntary touch she'd given him in days. He was more relieved than he could express. This was difficult and awkward, yes, but it was something they could deal with. Payson pulling away from him over the past week sent him into a panic like he'd never experienced before.

He did wash off his cologne before they went to the gym, and Payson said it helped, but things didn't get much better for her. She still couldn't touch him, and Sasha noticed for the first time that she was making a point not to touch Austin very much, either. She must have talked to Austin about this already, though, because he didn't seem to be worried and he was making an effort on his side as well. It was almost astounding to think about the way the two had changed from that first stressful, angry day that Payson found out she was pregnant to now, when they loved each other fiercely and kept no secrets. As impossible as it seemed, Austin and Payson were even closer since they broke up.

The next few days were full of awkward moments. Sasha would rather know than not, but it did make him more aware of things that he might have overlooked otherwise. For instance, he probably wouldn't haven't even heard the soft moans coming from her room when she was supposed to be taking a nap, much less computed what it meant. Nor would he have been so aware of the way her nipples hardened when she sat close to him, or how she leaned toward him out of pure instinct. In the end he was probably as uncomfortable as she was.

He was surprised when she took his hand on Thursday night and said, "Sleep with me tonight." She didn't usually ask out loud, but things were strange enough between them that he couldn't read her signs as well. Since most of her signs were telling him to keep his distance, it was difficult to pick up on the ones that told him to come to bed.

"Are you sure about this?" he asked as they made their way upstairs.

"Not really, no, but I've missed you. I think I'll be okay; I've, uh… worked off a little of my extra energy." She blushed, which surprised him because she'd said way worse than that before without batting an eyelash.

He should have let it go, but her embarrassment was too much to pass up. "Worked off you extra energy, huh? Did you sneak off to the gym before dinner for a quick work out?"

His teasing brought out her brassy side again. "Well if by the gym you mean my bedroom and by working out you mean getting off, then yes, I went to the gym to work out."

"So all these naps you've been taking…" It was number one million and one on the list of things that he shouldn't ask but couldn't stop himself.

"Sometimes I'm sleeping. Sometimes I'm not."

It astounded him how she could go from shy to tawdry to nonchalant in a matter of seconds. It was one of the things he loved about her, but also one of the things that made it hard to live with her at times. He knew things that he shouldn't know, although mostly because he asked things he shouldn't ask.

He changed in his bedroom and came back to hers just in time to see her pull a shirt over her head, giving him a clear view of her breasts in the process. He probably should have knocked, but then again she was just as likely to have said "come in" as "just a second." She didn't think much about changing in front of him unless she was making a real effort to make things easier for him, and she had other things on her mind at the moment.

"You know, it's a real miracle that you were ever able to do gymnastics with that body," he said as he crossed over to her.

She rolled her eyes. "I _didn't_ do gymnastics with this body. This came afterward, remember?"

"I'm not talking about this," he said, laying a hand on her stomach. Then, as if unable to control himself, he slid his hand up to brush the side of her breast. "I'm talking about these." Down to her hip, "And these." Around to grasp her ass, "And this. Most gymnasts look like children, but you… you're all woman. You're every man's fantasy."

"Including you?"

"Definitely including me," he answered. This wasn't news to her. She did his laundry, so she'd seen the stains from the nights he woke up from dreams about her. She'd felt how hard he was when she pressed against him at night. She could see now how turned on he was by just a few light touches.

She swayed toward him and let her nose brush against his neck. "This was such a bad idea," she whispered.

"This one was completely my fault, Pay," he whispered back. "I shouldn't have touched you like that. I just… couldn't stop." He still couldn't stop. His hand was still on her ass, trying to inch its way between her legs without his permission. He lost all self-control with that single glance of her topless.

She nuzzled her nose against his neck again. "Maybe we should both take a little time for ourselves and then try this again in a few minutes, when we're not quite so worked up."

He had to move his brain past the soft skin on the inside of Payson's thigh to understand what she was suggesting. It would probably be effective, but it seemed so wrong. But then again, how was it that different than what would happen anyway? If they decided to give up on the idea of sleeping together, he would go back to his room and dive into his fantasies and Payson would do the same thing in here. They would both know what the other was doing, so the only difference was whether or not they would sleep in the same bed when they were finished.

"Sounds like a plan," he said, and then, unable to resist messing with her, smirked and kissed her. "Have fun."

It had been a long time since they let things get this out of hand, but his fantasies had not run dry during that time. She was a permanent fixture in his mind, and since the discussion they had at the Olympic Village about masturbation, he hadn't bothered with denial. Rarely did a night pass when he didn't engage in some kind of imaginary act with Payson.

It didn't take him very long, but he wasn't sure how much time she might need, so he took his time cleaning up and then sat down with his laptop to do some checking on the Rock's budget. It was one of the least sexy things in the world to do, so it held the double benefit of killing time and killing his libido. It would be easier to sleep with Payson after a little time thinking about things like revenue and expenditures.

He did knock on her door this time, and she called for him to come in. She was reading in bed, and when he came in she raised an eyebrow and teased, "Wow, you must really have stamina to take that long."

"Funny, Pay. I was trying to give you plenty of time so that I didn't interrupt anything when I came back."

She laughed and said, "Wow, that gives new meaning to the term 'girl, interrupted.'"

"Huh?"

"It's a movie, idiot."

When he climbed into the bed, Payson sat her book aside and sat cross-legged on the bed facing him. She looked very serious, which made him more than a little nervous. "Before we go to sleep," she said, "I have to tell you something."

"Okay, what?" he asked with trepidation.

"So, obviously you know that sometimes the sex drive skyrockets in pregnant women." He snorted his agreement. That truth was hard to miss these days. She continued, "But there's this other part. Sometimes pregnant women have… dreams."

"Dreams? Like sex dreams?" It was the only thing that made sense in the context.

"Kind of, yeah, but… more," she hedged. "Like sex dreams on crack."

He laughed at her expression and asked, "So what kind of dreams, exactly?" Inappropriate question number one million and two.

"That's the thing, there's not really a _kind_. There's all kinds. Some of them are about me and Austin, some of them are about me and you, some of them are about, uh, all three of us. And then there are the really bizarre ones."

His laughter turned to coughing when she mentioned dreaming about the three of them together. He choked out, "There's something more bizarre than you dreaming about us having a threesome?"

"Yeah… there's the dreams about you being with other women, and Austin being with other women, or the ones about having sex in public. Like, last night I dreamed that I was having sex Austin in the middle of the gym while everybody watched. And then there are the dreams about me and Lauren."

He choked again. Images of Payson and Lauren together came unbidden to his mind, and as much as he wanted to stop the thoughts, he couldn't. "Bloodly hell, Payson, are you sure this is normal?"

"Definitely sure. My mom actually warned me about this a long time ago, and I googled it. A lot of women have these dreams, and some of them are even weirder than the ones I'm having. It's just some crazy side effect of the hormones."

"And you're telling me this why?" he asked. He was pretty sure he knew the answer, but he needed to check anyway.

"Because it's not just that we have these dreams, it's that we get really turned on by them. So there's a real chance that I might try to do something in my sleep."

"This is sounding less and less like a good idea, Payson. I already tend to do things while we sleep, so if you're doing it too who knows what might happen."

"Probably nothing worse than what's already happened," she said.

"That's not the point, Pays—wait, what do you mean what's already happened?" There had been a lot of wandering hands, but nothing more serious than that, at least as far as he knew. But Payson's face made it clear that he didn't know everything. "What have we done and when?"

Guilt clouded her face. "Remember that time in the Village, what you were doing when you woke up?" Of course he remembered. How could he forget? "Yeah, that wasn't the first time you're hand had been there that night."

"You said you didn't remember anything!"

"I didn't want you to freak out. You weren't ready to know that yet," she defended, "so I didn't tell you."

His mind was reeling. He couldn't believe Payson had known that all this time and never told him. "Was there anything else?"

Again, guilt. "There was another night when you did that, and a couple of times that I woke up rubbing against you. And that time you came in your sleep, that was actually me. I did that to you during the night."

He'd been humiliated when that happened. There were plenty of times when he woke up in the middle of the night and wanked in bed, but the last time he actually came in his sleep was probably before Payson was even born, so it was embarrassing as hell when he woke up that morning with a wet spot in the front of his pants. Payson had been consoling and told him that it wasn't a big deal and said that it was to be expected in a taxing situation like theirs, and all the time she knew that it was because of her.

"If you knew it was happening why didn't you stop it?" he asked. He always stopped when he woke up with his hands in a dangerous place.

"I wasn't actually _awake_ for any of this, Sasha. My orgasms woke me up, and even then it was sort of a half-sleep daze."

"And the time it was me?"

"I did that in my sleep," she said, "just like you've done it to me while you were asleep. It's what happens naturally. If I'm in bed with a man and turned on and my hand happens to brush against him, the natural reaction is to stroke."

For some reason that struck him as funny and he laughed. The more he laughed the funnier it seemed, until he finally realized that the whole situation was hilarious. He worked so hard to keep his attraction in check and all this time they'd been fooling around in their sleep. Of course, that just meant that he'd have to work harder in the future, but right now all he could do was laugh at the irony of it all.

Payson laughed with him, and when they calmed down several minutes later she said, "Honestly, Sasha, it's not that big of a deal. We aren't doing it on purpose, and it's been maybe five or six times out of the dozens of nights we've spent together. I'm not saying anything will happen tonight. I'm just saying don't be freaked out if it does."

"Fine," he agreed, "but no more keeping secrets about it. We're supposed to always be honest with each other."

"No more secrets, I promise. From now on I'll be completely honest."

They settled down to sleep, and despite all of the awkwardness and unexpected revelations, he was glad to be back in her bed. He missed it more than he would ever admit out loud.

* * *

><p>AN: I've googled so many strange things for this story that I'm not sure 'pregnant sex dreams' is even in the top ten weirdest. I seriously hope I'm lucky enough to have this symptom when I have babies :D

Several of ya'll asked for an Austin oneshot, and since I keep stalling out on the last few scenes of this story, I took the inspiration and ran with it. This way you can know Austin's future now if you want to, or you can wait until AF is over to know it.


	75. Chapter 75

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

A/N: Sasha kept intruding on the Payson/Austin part of this fic, so I figured it was only fair that Austin intruded on the Payson/Sasha part ;) This kinda snuck up on me from nowhere. Also, J-Lo ahead.

Check out Payson's outfit for this chapter on my pinterest, and I finally found a great video of Payson's photographer from the Body Issue. I watch it everytime I get on pinterest and it still makes me laugh.

* * *

><p>It was the first time Austin and Payson would make a public appearance together since they ended things two weeks ago. Payson managed to wrangle MJ into cancelling their PR work last weekend, but they couldn't cancel this weekend, nor did they want to. They were being honored at the White House, and that was something that neither of them wanted to miss. He went to the reception in 2008 and it was an awesome experience.<p>

What would be hard was pretending to be a couple when they weren't anymore. As far as the public was concerned, they were still together and would be for months longer, which meant that they had to act like a couple every time they went out together. It shouldn't be too difficult, because they were still as close as they ever were, but they had to share a hotel room and he wasn't sure how that would go. It could be fine or it could be very, very painful. Or, considering Payson's current state of mind, they could end up having sex again, and he wasn't sure how bad of an idea that might be.

But before any of that could happen, they had the good part. The part where they got to see their friends again after being separated for over a month, and it all started with one very high pitched squeal.

It came, of course, from Lauren Tanner, and it was closely followed by the blonde bombshell tackling Payson.

"It's so good to see you!" she screeched. "I've missed you so much!"

Payson's wry humor took a vacation for the time being, and she was every bit as excited as Lauren was. "I've missed you too! How's Stanford? How are things with Jake? Tell me everything."

Austin was absolutely certain about one thing in life: he didn't understand women. The girls Skyped two or three times a week, so they knew everything about each other's lives, but when they were together they had to hear it all again.

While Lauren gushed about life in California, Emily and Kelly arrived and the process started all over again. "Lo! Payson!"

It was chaotic. They went back and forth talking and interrupting each other, and none of them actually managed to finish a story. By the time Kaylie arrived half an hour later, Austin and his teammates were gathered together in a much more subdued reunion.

Nicky flew in with Austin and Payson, since he was living and training in Boulder again, and Jake and Steven came together from Oklahoma University while Max made the short hop over from the Hamptons. They greeted each other with a handshake and a thump on the back as opposed to the girls' jumping, screaming group hugs.

Once the girls became aware enough of the environment to realize that the men's team was all there, the relative peace was over and the men were drawn into the chaos. Lauren demanded that they describe every detail of their lives since they last saw each other, but these stories were much more concise than any of the women's had been. Steven summed things up the best: "I go to class. I do gymnastics. That's pretty much my life."

They decided to check in and drop their bags off, and then they all followed Lauren back to her room, where her boyfriend was sprawled out on the bed watching TV. He was the only American wrestler to win a medal, so he didn't have any friends to meet downstairs.

He shook hands with each of the men and introduced himself to the ones he didn't know, and then Jake Dalton asked, "So why are you up here when Lauren's been downstairs for the past hour?"

Jake Williams shrugged. "I'm trying to save my hearing. I figured Barbie would burst my ear drums if I went with her." It sounded like a smart plan.

"Don't call me Barbie," Lauren said, punching him in the arm. Austin got the impression that this was a frequent argument.

Kaylie ignored her friend's banter and asked, "So how is baby Tucker?"

Payson was glowing as she laid her hand on her belly and answered, "He's doing great. Perfectly healthy and growing exactly like he needs to. The doctor says me being sick hasn't affected him at all."

"We get to find out on Wednesday if he's really a he or if Payson's been wrong this whole time," Austin added.

"Wait, _what_?"

They all turned to see the shocked expression on Max's face, and only then did Austin remember that his ex-roommate and Payson's ex-boyfriend did _not_ know about the pregnancy. Payson expressed his thoughts perfectly. "Damnit, we suck at keeping secrets."

"You're _pregnant_?" Max cried.

"Yeah," Payson said. Austin could tell that she was searching for something else to say and coming up empty, and he didn't have anything to help her. What could they say to the guy that had a crush on them both when he finds out they're having a baby together? Sorry, dude, but we chose each other instead of you?

"You know what?" Max said, "I think I need a drink. I'll see you guys later."

Nicky piped up, "I'm betting on a girl tonight. Probably a hooker because there won't be as many people giving it away as there were at the Olympics."

It was horrible, but while they were in London the men's team started betting on the gender of the person Max would sleep with each night. It was their way of making light of an awkward situation, but it was still pretty damn awkward right now.

Jake Dalton broke past the discomfort in the room. "So why don't you look pregnant yet?" he asked Payson. "You're several months into this now aren't you?"

"Oh, I do look pregnant. I just have a great stylist who manages to hide the baby bump. Look." She ran her hand down her billowy top so that it stretched tight against her stomach, and all of a sudden she looked every bit of the four months pregnant that she was. It really was amazing what the right clothes could hide.

"Oh," Jake said. "Yeah, you do look pregnant."

Lauren completely ignored the exchange. "Can we go to dinner now? I'm starved."

"Hungry, I'm sure," said Kelly, "but you definitely aren't starving. You're getting fat, Lauren Tanner."

In the past Kelly might have said the same thing to insult Lauren, but now she said it as a joke. Lauren had gained a little bit of weight since she stopped training, but she was nowhere near fat, so she said, "Please, I've gained like four pounds. If anyone's fat here it's Payson."

"Hey!"

"Don't worry, Lauren," her boyfriend said, sending a leering grin her way, "I like you with a little meat on your bones."

"Okay," Nicky said, "Let's go before anyone else says something awkward."

On their way out Payson leaned to whisper something to Lauren, and Austin was the only one close enough to hear what she said. "Have you slept with him yet?"

Lauren shook her head and whispered back, "No, but maybe this weekend."

He was surprised, because Lauren's past relationships had moved at lightning speed and she'd been with this guy for a couple of months. He kept an eye on them for the rest of the night, and he figured something out pretty quickly. This was not a typical Lauren Tanner relationship. She wasn't needy and she didn't hang all over him. They were sarcastic with each other more often than not, and they pushed each other's buttons on purpose, but despite this Lauren looked happier than he'd ever seen her, and sometimes Jake looked at her the way Austin looked at Payson.

Austin mentioned it to Payson when they got back to their room that night.

"I know, and I'm so happy for her," she said. "This never would have happened a year ago. She wouldn't have had the self-confidence to be herself like she is with Jake, and he's a good match for her. He gives as good as he gets, and Lauren really needs that."

"So what about Kaylie? I'm not real clear on what it is that she's doing right now." She was living in New York, but she wasn't in school and she didn't have a job.

Payson laughed. "I don't think any of us are real clear on what Kaylie is doing, including Kaylie. From what I can tell she's mostly shopping."

"And she can't shop in Colorado?"

"Yeah, but if she stayed in Colorado she'd never figure out what she wants to do. Bumming around in New York is better than bumming around in Boulder. But I don't want to talk about Kaylie. I want to go to bed. It's been a long day."

"So how is this going to work?" he asked. "You've barely touched me all week because you're having a hard time keeping your hormones in check, so how are we supposed to sleep together without doing anything?"

She bit down on the corner of her lip. "I don't know. Not that I'm suggesting we do it, but would it be so bad if we did have sex? We do love each other, and it's not like either of us are with anybody else."

"That's what I've been trying to figure out. I've been thinking about it all day and I still don't have an answer. I don't want us to end up sex-buddies or anything, but obviously you have needs right now and I don't know if it's okay for me to help you."

"I'm feeling a little bit slutty here," she admitted. "Something sort of happened with Sasha last night, and then if something happened with you tonight… I mean, that's really slutty, right? Two different guys two nights in a row."

He frowned. "What exactly happened with Sasha?"

"Nothing serious. We just let things get out of hand and I ended up having to spend some quality time with my vibrator."

"Aren't you spending a lot of quality time with your vibrator anyway?" he asked. He knew she'd been doing that a lot since they stopped sleeping together.

"Yeah, well… the different part was that Sasha was in his bedroom spending some quality time with his right hand."

Silence, and then, "Wow. That was so much more information than I needed."

"Sorry," she said, and she actually looked contrite. Usually that word was said with a sorry-not-sorry tone. "But that makes me a slut, right, if we do something tonight?"

"No it doesn't. You didn't actually do anything with Sasha, and we don't know that anything will happen tonight. We might be fine."

She looked doubtful but said, "I'll try. I'll try to keep myself in check, but that's all I can promise. I don't know if I can do it."

"Then we'll deal with that when it happens."

He watched her change clothes, and he wasn't sure if she could do it, either. He knew her body, so he could tell how aroused she was and knew that she'd probably been that way all evening, maybe even all day. He decided then and there that he would have no hesitation giving her what she needed if she couldn't make it through the night. It was his responsibility to take care of her, and right now that included sexually.

Considering the circumstances, they should have slept on separate sides of the bed, but neither of them could bring themselves to do it. They were too used to touching while they slept, so they settled into the middle of the bed and he curled up behind her to sleep.

He woke a few hours later to Payson tossing in bed, and it took half a second for him to see that she was awake and uncomfortable. It was completely unfair to her that she was feeling this way because he got her pregnant and he wasn't even there to satisfy her need. She knew as soon as he woke up, just like she always did, and she turned to him with lust-clouded eyes. "I'm sorry, Austin. I'm swear I'm trying, but it's too much. I can't deal with it."

"It's okay, Payson. You can't control what's happening to your body. I can take care of you."

He gave her everything she needed and more. He made love to her when he could and then used every tool at his disposal when he couldn't. He was glad that he was young and had a pretty good rebound time, but the time in between he made good use of his hands and his mouth to bring her pleasure. As soon as he was hard again, she surprised him by going down on her knees for him. She said she'd been dreaming about it, and this was one of the few dreams that she wanted to and could make happen in real life.

By the time the sun rose the next morning she was a sweaty, trembling tangle of arms and legs, and she'd had more pleasure in those few hours than she'd ever experienced before.

"Feel better?" he asked. He was trailing lazy kisses up the inside of her leg while she slipped in and out of a sated doze.

She hummed her agreement. "Hmm, much. You are… incredibly good at that. _All_ of that."

He was a man, so that particular compliment never stopped being awesome to him, and Payson made sure to tell him on a regular basis. "You're pretty great at it, too," he said. She was amazing in bed, especially considering that she'd only been having sex for about three months and she had a pregnant belly getting in the way for at least half of that. He figured it was a combination of natural talent, athletic prowess, being a fast learned and, he hoped, having a good teacher. He liked to believe he taught her a thing or two.

"So, with complete honesty, does this screw us up?" She already knew the answer or she wouldn't have been so casual about the question, but he answered her anyway.

"Complete honesty, no. I don't have any expectations about this changing things or us going back to the way we were, and I know you don't either. I don't think we should make a habit of this, but as long as you need me I'll be here." He paused for a long time and tried to figure out how to say what he needed to. "You know it's okay if you find someone else, right? I won't resent it."

She ran her fingers through his hair and traced down his jaw. "I'm not looking for anyone else, Austin. I love you. I don't need anyone else."

"I know. I'm just saying in the future, if you find somebody else or if you decide you want to be with Sasha, don't hold back because of me. I want you to be happy."

"Sasha and I are just friends, Austin. Nothing's going to happen there." She said it with fond exasperation, completely confident in the statement, but Austin wasn't quite so confident. He stopped being jealous, but he didn't stop believing that there was more to their feelings for each other than Sasha or Payson either one realized. She loved Austin, yes, but she loved Sasha too.

He didn't press the issue because he knew she wasn't ready to hear the truth. He kissed his way up her body and asked, "So, with complete honesty… do you want to do this one more time before we have to get up?"

"Oh, thank God you asked." She lunged up to capture his lips with hers and then pulled the both back down to the bed. He meant it when he said they shouldn't make a habit out of this, but he was sure as hell going to enjoy it while he could.

o-O-o

Lauren thought she might be in love with Jake Williams, and there were a few big reasons why and a million little ones.

Reason number one: He wrestled on a professional circuit and made good money doing it, but if anyone asked him what his job was he would say he taught wrestling classes in a rec center in San Francisco. The classes were free, the gym was non-profit, and all the workers were volunteers, including Jake, but as far as he was concerned that was his real job and the competitive wrestling was just something he was lucky enough to get to do. He grew up in that gym and it was one of the most important things in the world to him, second only to his mom and Lauren.

Reason number two: She was tied with his mom as the most important thing in the world to him. She'd never had a guy put her first like that, and she'd certainly never had a guy care that much about his family and want her to be a part of it. He took her to meet his mom before they ever even left London, and competing at the Olympics on live television was nothing compared to the nerves she felt about that meeting. They couldn't have come from more different backgrounds. She came from a world of expensive clothes and instant gratification and he came from a world of working two jobs just to pay the bills. But in one really important way they were the same; her mom ran out on her family and his dad ran out of their family. No one could understand that kind of pain except someone else who experienced it.

Reason number three: He didn't pressure her to sleep with him. Lauren never understood how Payson could tell Sasha everything, and now Austin too, but she got it now. She trusted Jake enough to tell him anything, including her past with men. She told him that she wanted to wait because she didn't want to make him into another Carter, and he didn't even question her decision. He said to let him know when she was ready and he would be waiting, and he never complained when she put the brakes on. She knew it was hard for him to stop sometimes, but he always did, and most times she didn't even have to ask. He could tell when things were too fast for her and he either slowed down or stopped.

Tonight was one of those nights. She was ready to sleep with him, she knew it and so did he, but she wasn't prepared for how overwhelming it would be. She always thought sex was sex, but it turned out that when Payson and Emily said there was a difference between having sex and making love, they were telling the truth. She'd had sex before, but she'd never made love and the emotions were way more intense than she ever thought they would be. She didn't even realize that she was pulling away until he whispered in her ear, "Relax, Lo. It doesn't have to be tonight. We'll take it slow until you get used to feeling this way."

Tears prickled in her eyes when he said her name. He only called her Lo in their most intimate moments, and it just reminded her how much she wanted this. "No, I don't want to wait," she insisted, almost begged. "I'm ready. I want it to be tonight."

He lifted himself away from her so that he could look in her eyes. "I know you're ready, Lo, but I want this to be perfect for you. All you know is what sex is like in a bad relationship, so give me tonight to show you what it can be like with someone who loves you. Let me take care of you tonight and then we can try this again tomorrow."

One word rang out in her mind. "You love me?"

"Of course I love you, stupid. But don't you dare go saying it back."

She frowned in confusion. "Why not? Don't you want me to say it?"

"Not if you're only saying it because you think you're supposed to. I can wait for that just like I can wait for this."

For a few seconds she forgot what it was that they were doing, despite the fact that they were nearly naked in bed together. It wasn't the first time they shared a bed or even the first time they lost a few clothes in the process, but it always stopped there. Suddenly she was nervous again. "What do you mean 'take care of me'?"

"Let me show you."

She wasn't exactly inexperienced when it came to sex, but she was inexperienced when it came to being loved. This was the first time she'd ever been with a guy when she wasn't thinking about what he wanted, and Jake made sure that she was only thinking about herself. He touched her in ways she'd never been touched before and didn't ask for anything in return, and when he sent her tumbling into her very first orgasm, she realized that everything she thought she knew about sex was wrong. _This_ was the way it was supposed to be.

She drifted asleep in his arms, surprisingly okay with the fact that she was naked and he wasn't, but she woke just a few hours later. It took her a minute to realize that she was awake because he was, and another minute to realize what it was that woke him in the first place.

He grinned at her in the dark, the same cocky smirk that she loved so much, and joked, "Sounds like someone's having fun."

Noises were coming from the room next door. Noises which, unfortunately, Lauren was familiar with. "Yeah, that's Austin and Payson. They're always that loud. Although I'm a little confused since last I heard they weren't together anymore."

"I'm a little disturbed by the fact that you can identify them by their sex noises. And the fact that you don't seem bothered by it."

"We shared an apartment in London," she explained. "I heard this a lot."

"Ahh, got it. So is this gonna take very long?" he asked. "Because I don't think I can sleep with all this racket."

She snorted. "Well, it's the middle of the night, so they've probably already slept a little bit, so… yeah. They won't get tired anytime soon."

His only response was the climb out of bed and dig around in his bag until he found something. He came back holding the split headphones he bought especially for her and plugged them into his iPhone. He handed one set of ear buds to her and put the other set in his own ears as if it was a completely normal thing to do.

She laughed and leaned over to kiss him. "I love you."

The words slipped out of her mouth before she could even consider what she was saying. He couldn't hear her because he had the headphones on, but those three words were easy to lip read. He pulled them out of his ears and said, "Did you just say what I think you just said?"

She gulped. "I did."

"Not that I'm complaining, but why now?" It was one of the worst responses ever to the three little words, but she knew exactly what he meant. She couldn't have chosen a weirder moment to figure out how she felt about him.

"I don't know, you're just funny. You brought me music to drown out the sound of my best friend having sex and acted like there was nothing unusual about that. It was cute."

"Lauren Tanner, you are one of the strangest people I have ever met." He pulled her closer and kissed her. "And I love you for it."

o-O-o

There was a general air of excitement among the group touring the White House. Some of them had seen it before, maybe on a school tour or family vacation, or for a few of them this same reception after Beijing, but there were some who had never been there. Those were the people like Payson and her friends, or a lot of the other athletes who started competing on an international level at a young age. They were too busy training and competing to have time for something as trivial as a tour of the White House, at least until now.

The excitement wasn't about the tour, though. It was about what came after it. No matter how old you were or how many times you did it, being honored by the President of the United States never got less cool. Austin had been there, done that, but he was just as excited about this reception as he was about the first one.

Early in the morning Lauren pulled Payson away for some kind of girl talk, but afterwards Payson came back to Austin and linked her hand with his while they walked. He was relieved when she leaned against him with a contented sigh. It said for sure that nothing had changed between them, and also that Payson was feeling comfortable in her body for the time being. On the outside their position might look sweet or romantic, but really this was just normal non-couple behavior for them. They'd been holding back since they ended things because Payson was having a hard time dealing with her pregnancy hormones, but this was how they were supposed to be. Best friends, maybe even deeper. They were the most important people in each other's life, at least on one level. Ava and Sasha were each equally important, but in a very different way, and of course the baby was the center of all their lives.

They stayed like that for the rest of the tour, and when it was over they headed toward the ballroom where they would meet the President. Payson, always cool under pressure, leaned over and whispered, "This is so cool."

He laughed, drawing strange looks from those around him. Payson was born to be famous, because nobody intimidated her. She wasn't always this way; a year ago she turned into a screaming fan whenever she met an Olympic gold medalist, but her four gold medals at Worlds gave her the confidence she needed to speak with anybody. It wasn't conceit; she just had a great understanding of who she was and knew that she could stand with the best of them, even including the President.

She got a chance to prove it that afternoon. She was rubbing elbows with every medalist from the London Olympics, and whereas in the past she would have been seeking her favorites out to meet them, today she was the one being sought out. Payson and Austin were both tied with Michael Phelps for the biggest medal haul from London, but Payson was the center of attention, both because of the drama and controversy surrounding her Olympics and because she was hot. Hot women always got more attention than hot men.

Missy Franklin and Alison Schmitt, two of the other big stars of London, came to meet her and said they were huge fans, which Payson got a kick out of because she was a fan of theirs, too. It was hard not to be a fan of those two because they were so genuinely happy all the time, which was also a big reason that so many people loved the women's gymnastics team. People wanted to see their athletes having fun, or, in the swim team's case, lip synching to "Call Me Maybe."

Phelps made his way to her during the reception as well and, by way of introduction, said, "So you're the girl I'm supposed to have dated, huh?" Austin was standing right there, but the swimmer didn't even try to hide the fact that he was flirting.

Payson didn't give an inch. "And you're the guy that people say I've dated."

Michael picked up on her less than flattered tone. "Why do I get the impression that you're not happy about the connection?"

"I don't like it when people make stuff up about me."

"Then you're in the wrong profession," he said with a wink. "Rumors come with the territory."

Payson flashed a sweet smile. "Okay, then let me rephrase myself. I don't like it when people hit on me when they know I have a boyfriend."

Phelps looked like he'd been slapped in the face. "I'm so sorry," he said. "I didn't mean any offense. I'm just—"

"Used to girls fawning over you?" Payson suggested.

"Well, yeah," he said, humble now that Payson called him out. As much as Austin hated to see the other man flirting with Payson like that, he understood. He was in the same position himself once, where you start expecting women to fall all over you because so many have in the past. Fame did that sort of thing to you, warped your sense of reality, and sometimes it took a hit over the head to snap out of it. The Rock Rebels all hit Austin hard enough to knock him out of that mindset permanently, and Payson had just done it to Michael Phelps on at least a temporary basis. He was perfectly nice the rest of the time they talked, and he included Austin in the conversation as well.

The athletes mingled together with a few key political figures and reporters during cocktails, but after dinner and the President's speech, Barack and Michelle Obama circulated the room as well. Payson was careful not to hug anybody while she was hiding the pregnancy, but when the First Lady of the United States leans in for a hug there isn't anything else to do but hug her back, which was how Michelle Obama found out that Payson Keeler, America's darling, was now Payson Keeler, teen mom. A lot of people knew by now, but they all had at least a passing relation with Payson, so it turned out that the President's wife was the first complete stranger to find out about that Payson was pregnant.

They both had great poker faces and didn't give anything away other than a very slight widening of the older woman's eyes. She pulled away and said "Congratulations."

"Thank you," Payson said. "It's been such a great experience."

Austin was almost certain that there was a double meaning to the conversation, but everybody else would assume it was all about Payson's success at the Olympics. Which it might very well be.

"You're an extraordinary woman, Payson," the First Lady said. "I'm sure you have a great future ahead of you."

When the Obamas moved on to meet other athletes, Austin leaned to whisper in Payson's ear. "Did you just have some kind of mysterious girl talk with Michelle Obama?"

"Yeah. You have to read between the lines. She asked me if I was happy about it and I told her I was, and then I'm sure you caught the congratulations in that last bit."

Austin didn't get it, but he considered his confusion pretty normal by now. Just like when the girls first saw each other the day before, one thought stood out in his mind: He didn't understand women, and he never would.

* * *

><p>AN: The idea for Lauren and Jake is that they're the reflection of Steve and Chloe. Did that come across?

Huge, exciting news: today I wrote the last scene of Amor Fati. Less exciting news: just a couple hundred words short of that feat, I realized that I left out something big earlier on and I have to go back and add it in. Should be soon, though.

Go check out Those Left Behind if you want to find out what happens to Austin in the future!


	76. Chapter 76

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

A/N: I've never been a fan of tricks, so here's a treat for you :) Happy Halloween to you all, and a big thanks to Zabini!

Parts of this chapter are an ode to my all-time favorite episode of Castle, _Home is Where the Heart Stops_. Other parts are ridiculously over dramatic ;)

* * *

><p>Austin didn't know how Payson was so calm. He could barely keep still he was so excited, but she was sitting in the waiting room reading a magazine like this was any normal appointment. Like they weren't about to find out the sex of the baby.<p>

Out of respect for their privacy, the nurse didn't call out Payson's name when she opened the door for them to come back. She just nodded her head at them like they had already arranged at her previous appointments. Most people in an obstetrician's office had better things to think about than noticing the two celebrities in the corner, but calling out "Ms. Keeler" in Boulder, Colorado was bound to draw some attention, and the Dr. Lehmann's staff were courteous enough to work around the problem.

The nurse led them back to an examination room and did a few quick checks on Payson, then she left them alone to wait for the doctor. Once the door was closed, Payson held her hand out for him to hold and he saw it in her eyes—she wasn't so calm after all. She was just as excited as he was, but there was something else there too. Nervousness or fear, he thought.

"What's wrong, Pay?" he asked, taking her hand.

"Nothing, really. It's just… I know they _say_ he's okay, but we haven't actually seen him in nearly two months. What if they're wrong?"

It hadn't even occurred to him to worry about the baby because the doctor had assured them so many times that he was healthy, but he should have realized that Payson would be anxious. She felt responsible for anything that might happen to Alex because of her illness, even though she had no control over that, and she still wasn't completely over the fear of dying herself. She was much healthier, weaning off the transfusions to the point that she was now going several weeks in between them, but knowing how close she was to death would have a lasting impact on her. They were only now truly dealing with the truth of how sick she was, because at the time they had to focus on the positive above all else. It was nearly a month after the Olympics when he woke up to Payson sobbing because she finally broke down her walls and let herself process the truth of her illness.

He stood up and leaned against the table that she was sitting on so that he could wrap his arm around her. "Payson, he's going to be fine. Dr. Lehmann is a great doctor, so if he says that Alex is healthy then I believe him, and in a few minutes we'll be able to see it for ourselves."

She dropped her head on his shoulder. "I know, I'm just scared. I am so excited to see him again, though. The last time we saw him was at twelve weeks, and he's grown so much since then. Can you believe that we're halfway through now?"

"It's hard to believe, isn't it? It's gone by so fast."

"It seems like yesterday," she agreed. "It's crazy, when I found out that I was pregnant I thought my life was over, but now I feel like it's just beginning… God, that sounded like such a cliché."

"It was a cliché, but it's true," he assured her. "We have so much ahead of us, and I there's no one in the world that I'd rather share it with than you."

"Me too. I'm so glad it was you."

It wasn't the first time she said that, but he felt a wave of relief wash over him every time he heard it. Things were so bad between them at the beginning, and it wasn't all on Payson's side. He made more than his share of mistakes and he was still afraid that Payson resented him for that, but deep down he knew it wasn't true. It was a rough road getting there, but now she loved him as much as he loved her, and he loved her more than ever.

They didn't speak much while they waited for Dr. Lehmann because Payson got the most comfort from touch. He held her tight and linked one of his hands with hers against her rounded belly so that Alex was included in the embrace. They were a family already, the three of them and then the bizarre mix of close friends and blood relatives. The blood connection didn't make much difference for them; Kevin and his wife would be grandparents to the baby rather than Robert and Louise Tucker.

He told his parents over the phone at the same time that he called to tell them that Ava was moving to Colorado. She had already been there for a month at that point and had all of her stuff shipped out of her Dallas apartment, but they never bothered to check on her. Austin called out of courtesy for his mom, and while he had her on the phone he told her that he and Payson were having a baby. She told him congratulations and sounded like she meant it, but in the background Robert was yelling about his good for nothing son knocking up some teenage tramp. If they had been face to face Austin would have punched his father, but as it was he hung up the phone and went to Payson and Sasha's house where she spent the night just holding him until his anger melted away. The next morning he found out that Sasha called Kevin and his old coached flew in on a redeye to get him through the day. His mom never called him back, but Kevin stayed for two days.

Payson calmed down when her doctor came into the room, just like she always did. Dr. Lehmann had that effect on everyone.

"Ah, you are very anxious to see your baby again, are you not?" he said.

Payson didn't bother to put on an act. "Yes, very. You're sure he's going to be okay?"

"I am certain, but since you must see to believe, let us take a look. I will also be able to tell you if you have been calling the baby by the right name." His teasing drew smiles from both Austin and Payson. His professional advice was not to call a baby by its name until the sex was certain, but Payson held tight to her belief that Alex was a boy.

Despite what Dr. Lehman said about the baby being fine, he did the ultrasound himself rather than having a tech do it. Austin hoped that it was because Payson was considered a high risk pregnancy rather than the doctor actually expecting to find a problem, but he was at least relieved to know that an expert would be the one doing the exam so that nothing would be missed.

He understood the process a lot better than he did the first time he witnessed an ultrasound in the ambulance in London, and he had a much better idea of what he was looking at. Payson had a total of seven of them done early in the pregnancy and he had watched the videos from every one of them hundreds of times, so he could tell what was on the screen when Dr. Lehman turned it on. In ways it was harder to see than the last one at twelve weeks, because the baby was moving around a lot and the doctor had to move the probe much more, but he could see some things clearly—the head, a leg waving around, the mindboggling fact that his son was sucking his thumb. If it was in fact a son.

Payson was the first to ask. "Is it a boy?"

"Let us see," the doctor said. He moved the wand around and the image swished and blurred until it finally cleared with a very different view, a view in which it was obvious that… "Ah, you were right, Payson. It is a boy."

"I told you so." The smugness in Payson's voice was impossible not to laugh at. She was never going to let this go. She smacked him and said, "Be serious."

He sobered and lifted her hand for a kiss. "I am serious, I promise. This is the most amazing thing I've ever seen."

"I love you."

"I love you, too," he said. It was odd to have such an intimate moment in front of someone else, but this was one of the rare times that it was expected. "I love you both."

o-O-o

Payson once told him that MJ said stylists could do amazing things, and she was right. She wasn't showing much, which Dr. Lehmann attributed to her wider hips, but at 22 weeks she well into maternity clothes. At the gym it was obvious that she was pregnant, but when she went out at functions it was nearly impossible to tell. Her red dress hung in just the right way to hide her new shape.

The look was harder to pull off in casual clothes, which was why MJ booked them only at red carpet events now, and this particular red carpet was one that Payson was happy to walk. The weather was threatening to ruin it, but they were at a fundraiser for the New York Contemporary Ballet Company, of which her friend Jayden was the principal dancer. She was also getting a kick out of wearing ridiculously expensive jewelry. All the rich New York housewives came decked out in their flashiest gems and Payson had to play the part, so she borrowed a piece from her sponsor Tiffany's that cost more than his house did.

Someone called Payson's name. He turned around and found the source of the voice, a dark haired woman in a slinky white dress who he'd never met before. Beside him, Payson's face brightened and she called out, "Jayden! It's so good to see you again."

Austin's mind was blown. He'd seen pictures of Jayden in costume on the Company's website and photographs of a tomboy out fishing with a younger Sasha, but this woman was nothing like what he was expecting. He couldn't say that she was as glamorous as Payson, because nobody was, but she came pretty close.

Payson mentioned the transformation. "I barely recognized you without your baseball cap. You look amazing."

"Yeah, I don't do the girly thing very often, but it's fun every once in a while. I blame Sasha for my style, really. He was this really rough and tumble outdoorsy kid and I copied everything he did, including what he wore."

Payson introduced them. "Jayden, this is Austin. Austin, this is Jayden, the woman who inspired my floor routine."

Jayden blushed and ignored the compliment, much like Sasha would. Austin saved her from finding a response by asking "So how did you meet Sasha? I've always been curious how he gets all of the connections he seems to have."

"Our mom's were both were in the Royal Ballet together and so was Viola, Payson's teacher. My mom moved to America to marry my dad, but we all took vacations together a few times a year, so Sasha and I kind of grew up together. But he was five years older than me so I idolized him."

"And he encouraged it, I'm sure," Payson joked. "I bet he had an ego the size of the sun even back then."

Payson's last few words were whipped away by a sudden burst of wind. It was so strong that Austin slid his arm around her out of instinct, holding her up while the wind threatened to blow her over. All around women's hair and dresses were swirling around them and the photographers were going mad snapping pictures of the rich socialites suffering the indignity of a gust of wind.

Austin hollered over the deafening noise, "Let's go inside before it starts pouring." The girls agreed and he escorted them inside with a hand at both their backs, a protective gesture that he couldn't help. They were barely inside when the sky opened up. Others weren't so lucky, but dozens of staff members were prepared with umbrellas to hold over the patrons as they all rushed to the front doors of the Waldorf.

All of the dry guests were ushered to the ballroom while the less than dry guest were hurried off to some other place only to return a little while later looking like they'd never been in a rainstorm. "How do you think they did that?" Austin asked.

"I'm guessing they've got a whole lot of hair dryers in some back room." He snorted at the idea of a bunch of rich people standing around in their underwear while someone pointed a hair dryer at their fancy clothes.

It was just him and Payson for a few blissful moments. Jayden was working the room, schmoozing the people who were supporting her company and generally trying to flatter them into giving more money. It was standard protocol for any of the arts, but Austin was glad that he didn't have to do it. The NGO did it, of course, but they mainly left the gymnasts out of the process. He and Payson had to mingle and play up their image, which definitely did not include asking for money or support. The whole idea was for people to think that they were so awesome that sponsors flocked to them, which was more or less true.

A strange look passed over Payson's face and she pulled him away from the crowds and into a private alcove. The odd behavior worried him. "What's wrong, Pay?"

"Nothing's wrong. Feel this." She took his hand and placed it on her stomach, then held it there until he felt the slightest flutter against his skin.

"Is that…?"

"It is. Alex is kicking."

She'd been feeling this for weeks, but before when he laid his hand where she told him he didn't feel anything. She assured him that this was normal and it might take a while before Alex was kicking hard enough for him to feel it, but he couldn't help but feel like he was missing out. Now that he got to share it with her he understood why she lit up when he kicked. This was the most amazing thing in the world.

"I… this is… I can't believe it. That's our baby. He's moving." Stating the obvious was the best he could manage at the moment. He was too awed to find real words.

"This is our baby," she repeated. She pressed her forehead against his and placed a soft kiss on his lips. "We did this, Austin. We made him."

He could have stayed that way for hours, holding Payson in his arms and marveling every time Alex moved, but they had a very unwelcome interruption.

"Sir? Ma'am?" a bellboy said, obviously thinking that he interrupted something other than what they were doing. "You need to come back to the ballroom. We're gathering everybody together in there."

There was an urgency in the kid's voice that didn't fit with his words. Payson caught onto it. "Why? What's going on?"

"There's a tornado in the area."

Her arms wrapped around her midsection like that could protect the baby from nature's wrath. Austin laid his arm around her shoulder and led her back to where they came from, the best place for them to be during a tornado—a windowless room large enough to hold them all. "Don't worry about it," he told Payson. "Tornadoes aren't that big of a deal. We had them all the time in Texas. Once I even spent a few hours locked in a bathroom at Starbucks with ten other people."

He meant it to make her smile, but it was also true. That was one of the worst tornadoes Dallas had seen in a long time, and the safest place to go in a Starbucks was the bathroom. It was the only room in the building not surrounded by glass. The Waldorf was a great building to sit out a tornado in because it was built with steel, but the real danger would be from panicking guests who'd never experienced this kind of weather.

The ballroom was one of the most unusual sights he had ever seen. It was a mixture of people dressed to the nines for social functions, staff in their uniforms, guests in normal clothes, and people in their pajamas. He spotted a few couples who were obviously in the middle of sex when they were interrupted and a lot of people with wet hair straight out of the shower.

He led Payson to a corner and pulled a table over for them to sit on top of. It was a stupid thing to do tornado-wise, because he was surrounding them with walls that could possibly collapse on top of them, but he was far more concerned about people trampling them if the electricity went out. This way nobody could crush them in an attempt to get out.

Payson spotted Jayden across the room and called out to her. The ballerina fought her way through the crowds to join them. She hopped on the table, although her tight dress made it difficult, and asked, "Why are we up here? Aren't we supposed to duck and cover or something?"

He rolled his eyes. "That's for nuclear bombs. For tornadoes you get away from the windows and into something that won't blow away. This building should be safe, but I want us away from people who might panic." He signaled one of the staff members over and asked, "Can we get a flashlight?"

"I'm sorry, sir," the girl said, "but we're not handing out flashlights. We don't have enough for everybody and the safest thing right now is to let us handle them in strategic areas so that the light gets evenly distributed if we lose power."

It was a scripted response and Austin knew the keyword to get around it. "She's pregnant."

The girl glanced at Payson, who still had her arms wrapped around her stomach, and then looked back at Austin. "I'll see what I can do." A few minutes later she was back with a flashlight.

Jayden was staring at them in shock. While the hotel worker was gone she asked, "Is there something you need to tell me, Payson?"

For a minute Payson looked past her fright and found her normal dry wit. "No, not really. Austin pretty much covered it."

"You're pregnant? Payson gymnastics-is-my-entire-life Keeler is pregnant?"

"I guess it's not my entire life anymore," she said with a shrug. "I'm not going to pretend that this was on purpose, but we're really happy about it. Alex is the best thing that ever happened to me."

"Alex?" Jayden asked, dazed.

"Yeah, Alex," Austin said, pulling Payson against his side. She reached up to kiss his cheek. "Our little boy."

"I think I must be hallucinating." With those words, the lights flickered around them and finally died. Austin switched on the flashlight amongst the frightened screams of people in the ballroom. All around them Waldorf workers were doing the same as Austin, with lights flashing on like stars coming out in the evening. He suctioned theirs to the table and let the LED bulbs form a cave of light around them.

Payson scooted closer to him and, surprisingly, so did Jayden. "Are you sure we'll be okay?" Pay asked.

"I'm sure. I've been through probably a dozen of these things. Once I even slept through one."

"You did not," Jayden said, calling him out on what sounded like a lie.

He held up on hand like an oath. "I swear on my Olympic title that I'm telling the truth. I woke up one morning and half the shingles on our roof were missing and the tree from my backyard was lying in the front yard. I didn't even know it was happening."

Time passed slowly. Payson fell asleep first, and then Jayden, but Austin kept vigil all night long. Sometime around three o' clock people started passing in and out of the previously closed doors, and at around dawn they started leading people out of the ballroom in small groups. Everyone with a room was allowed to go back and a few select people from the social functions were allowed to take up space in the rooms that weren't reserved for the night. Austin, Payson, and Jayden were among the first to get this privilege, courtesy of the girl who brought him a flashlight earlier in the evening.

He carried Payson without waking her, but he had no choice to wake Jayden. He couldn't carry them both. They were led to what was probably one of the hotel's smallest suites, with one bedroom and a tiny sitting room, but it was more than he could have hoped for under the circumstances. He slipped Payson's clothes off while she slept, a talent he developed during the many times Payson fell asleep early, settled her beneath the covers, and went to sleep on the couch so that the women could share the bed. It was probably a little awkward for two women who didn't know each other very well, but it was the most comfortable option for them.

When he woke up a couple of hours later, Payson was sitting on the edge of the couch wearing a Waldorf=Astoria bathrobe.

"Hey, what are you doing up?" he asked.

She smiled and teased, "I missed you. Jayden's not nearly as fun to cuddle with."

He pulled her down with him on the thankfully very wide couch and curled against her back. Now that she was past her fear, her sense of humor was back in full force. "I suppose it would be bad for us to have sex while there's someone in the next room, wouldn't it?"

"That's never stopped us before," he joked back. They had sex with her teammates all just a room away, with Sasha just across the hall, with Nicky and Ava in nearby rooms, and worst of all in both of their kitchens where anybody could walk in on them. Nicky was the only one misfortunate enough to actually do that, but that was just because he had on headphones and didn't hear them. Sasha and Ava both noticed the sounds and walked the other way.

"Hmm, good point. Let's do it."

He was 99.9 percent sure that she was teasing, but that .1 percent had him a little worried so he said, "I think it might be a little different this time, though, since we don't know Jayden nearly as well as we knew everyone else. And also, we don't have a door."

She pouted. "Spoil sport."

Now he was 99.99 percent sure that she was joking, but with Payson he could never be positive. When it came to sex there was always a chance, no matter how small, that she was serious.

They went to sleep (without having sex) and didn't wake up until late in the morning. The three of them ordered room service, which the waiter insisted was complimentary due to the unfortunate circumstances that led to them staying there, and left soon after. All they had to wear was their formal attire from the night before, and rather than hailing a cab dressed like they were, Austin talked to the concierge and arranged for a car to pick them up. The car they hired the night before was obviously well past the hours of service. He offered to pay for the car, the food, and the room, but the hotel manager wouldn't hear of it. Austin guessed that they lost millions of dollars in all the complimentary rooms and services they were providing that day, but the great publicity might make up the difference. Everybody who was at the Waldorf during the tornado would talk for years about how generous the hotel was during such a hard time.

They weren't the only ones still dressed in their red carpet bests, and everybody seemed to be milling around waiting for a car to take them home or to whatever hotel they were staying at. It would probably be a while before their trio got a car, so Austin and Payson sat down on a couch while Jayden wandered over to glance at the newsstand.

"Payson," she called, "You might want to see this."

There were several different papers with news about the tornado printed on the front cover, but Jayden wasn't looking at those. She was holding a copy of Page Six magazine with the words "Payson Keeler Pregnant?" blazoned across the top. Below there was a picture taken last night, so the photographer must have barely made the deadline, of Payson and Austin being blasted by wind on the red carpet. The dress that did such a good job of hiding the pregnancy during normal weather was whipped back against her body, leaving a clear outline of her stomach. There would be no denying this picture. Within hours the whole world would know that Payson was pregnant.

"I was starting to wonder if anyone was ever going to notice," Payson said, unperturbed. "I thought this would happen weeks ago."

"So what are you going to do, put out a press release?" Jayden asked.

"No, I'm not even going to comment on it. MJ said not to confirm or deny, and to make jokes whenever people asked, so that's what I'm going to do. She hasn't steered me wrong yet."

"I don't know how you're handling this so well," the dancer said. "When I was your age I would have freaked out in your position."

"I think you might be giving me too much credit. Austin can attest to the fact that I did _not_ handle it well when I first found out. Of course, he didn't either—no offense, babe."

"None taken." She was right. Neither of them handled the news well in the beginning.

Payson tugged on his hand. "Come on, let's go sit back down. It's stupid to concentrate on this."

It was stupid to concentrate on it, but it was hard not to, especially when they left the hotel to a mob of photographers yelling questions at them. News traveled fast around here, but Payson got that last word. Just as they were climbing in the car she rolled her eyes and joked to Austin, loud enough for everybody to hear, "Geez, you gain a few pounds and everybody thinks you're pregnant. I'll probably eat dessert tonight and read in the papers tomorrow that I'm carrying triplets."

* * *

><p>AN: Austin's tornado stories are real stories that happened to me. I live smack dab in the middle of Tornado Alley, so I've been through dozens of them. When you hear about horrible tornados on the news, what they don't tell you is that there have probably been six or seven others that month that didn't cause any damage. 99 times out of 100 you'll sit huddled in a room with a bunch of other people for a few hours and nothing happens, but you can't ever get too comfortable because there is always that small chance that it really will hit you.

So I have HUGE, EXCITING news. Amor Fati is finished! I'm going to take a week off and re-read it to make sure that there is nothing I need to add/change (I'm dyslexic so my reading is excruciatingly slow), and then I'll post several gigantic chapters. Within a month this story will be complete!


	77. Chapter 77

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

A/N: There may or may not be more Summer bashing this chapter. I would bet on the 'may' rather than the 'may not.'

Sadly, the first part of this is based on the tweets that Tom Daley and Rebecca Adlington had to put up with after the Olympics, and the bit about what people said about Brooklyn Beckham is true. This website is idiotic and won't let me use the "at" symbol, so I'm using a hash tag instead. It drives me nuts because it's wrong, but there isn't much choice :(

* * *

><p>"This is just idiotic," Payson said.<p>

Sasha sat down beside her on the couch and asked, "What is?"

Her only answer was to hand him her phone. Her twitter feed was pulled up and it was flooded with messages, just like it had been for days.

There were the harmless ones. _Is #PayK really pregnant or is this made up?; Congrats to parent-to-be #PayK and #ATuck08!; I heard that #PayK is having a baby. Not really sure if it's true but I guess it means she's retired for good._

Then there were the crude ones that only got cruder as time passed. _Wish I had impregnated #PayK; Way to go #ATuck08 for knocking up the hottest girl alive. #PayK can carry my baby any day; I guess the beam isn't the only thing #PayK is straddling; I love pregnant chicks. Now I can shoot my load in #PayK and not worry if I'm the babydaddy._

It was the crazy ones that really pissed Sasha off, though. _#PayK u r going to hell. i hope ur baby dies; You are a disgrace to gymnastics #PayK; #PayK ur a fucking whore; #PayK god will kill u for what u did u deserve to die and go 2 hell_

Payson pretended not to care, but this had to be getting to her. The support of those who cared about her was the only thing that kept her from going postal from all the abuse. #PregoPayson was currently trending, but the teenagers at the gym were making it their mission to get #CoachKeelerRocks trending, and her friends were making it into one big joke.

#TeamTanner: Hey #PayK I heard you're going to hell ;) Make sure you say hi to #TheRealKP while you're there… you know, 'cause she's Satan #CoachKeelerRocks #Team2012

#TheRealKP: Haha #TeamTanner. You're just jealous because #PayK and I are so much cooler than you #CoachKeelerRocks #Team2012 #SoMuchBetterThanYou

#JDalton: Congrats to my friend #PayK … For being the impetus of one of the stupidest twitter trends ever. #UntrendPregoPayson #CoachKeelerRocks

#ATuck08: Congrats to my friend #JDalton for using an SAT word on twitter. Quit hitting on #PayK by using fancy words. #MyGFisHotterThanYours #CoachKeelerRocks

#Kaylie_Cruz: What #PayK, you're pregnant?! I'll never forgive you for not telling me. Oh wait… never mind #CoachKeelerRocks #Team2012

#MightyMightyKmetko: Sorry #PayK, my mommy says I can't play with you anymore. Something about you hanging the wrong way on the monkey bars… #CoachKeelerRocks #Team2012 #playgroundbullies

#PayK: #MightyMightyKmetko hahahaha. I love you, Em. #BestFriendsEver #Team2012

#The_Damon_Young_Band: Don't listen to her, #PayK. The real reason she can't play with you is because she's grounded. Her mom caught us chasing the weasel around the mulberry bush. #CoachKeelerRocks #playgroundbullies

#WrestlerJake: Hey #PayK, #TeamTanner just told me that someone wanted to tar and feather you. Welcome to the club. #HonoraryBlackPerson #CoachKeelerRocks

#TheOtherATuck: Sorry #PayK, but apparently you're fat. I know it must be true because I read it in my Slam Book #CoachKeelerRocks #highschoolbullies

#StevenLegendre_OU: #TheOtherATuck just outed me… I wrote about #PayK in the Slam Book. I also wrote her phone number on the bathroom wall #CoachKeelerRocks #highschoolbullies

#Nicky_Russo: You wrote the wrong number #StevenLegendre_OU. I called and it was actually #ATuck08 #awkward #wrongnumber #CoachKeelerRocks

Her friends kept her laughing through all of the idiocy being thrown her way. Lauren actually texted a quote to her the day the picture first showed up: "You better brace yourself for a whole lot of ugly coming your way on a never ending train of stupid." She followed it up with _But you'll always have me to make you laugh or let you cry, whatever you need :)  
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Sasha pulled her against him and draped his arm over her shoulders. "Be honest with me, Pay. Is this upsetting you?"

"Not really. I expected it, and I'm just relieved that everyone at the gym is taking this so well. But it makes me angry when people say stuff about Alex. They have no right to talk about him like that."

She was right. The abuse against Payson was one thing, but talking about the baby was crossing a line. Calling him a bastard or saying that he should die was just the tip of the iceberg. Sasha remembered going to a Manchester United game not long after the Sydney Olympics, when Brooklyn Beckham was just a baby, and the fans were chanting "Brooklyn takes it up the arse." It made him sick then and it still made him sick now. There had to be something wrong with a person to make them say that.

He laid his hand on her swollen stomach, a gesture that was as comforting to him as it was to her. "To hell with them," he said. "They're a bunch of miserable people who have to tear down others to feel like they're worth anything. But you're not like that. You're worth more than a million of them put together."

"That doesn't make it suck any less."

"It doesn't, but maybe a surprise will? Something to think about besides the idiots on twitter?" She was fine unless she thought too hard about what people were saying, so he wanted to get her mind off of it. He had the perfect way, a surprise that he and Mark had been working on together for weeks. It was a huge step on Mark's part, who never fully forgave Sasha for the kiss debacle, and seeing them together made Payson happy. She thought they were just bonding, hanging out in the shed drinking beer and watching sports, but the whole time they'd been creating a gift for Payson.

"Well it depends on how good the surprise is," she teased. "It would have to be pretty great to make this better."

"Oh, it is, but I can't tell you yet. It's not just my surprise to give away."

She sat up, her curiosity piqued. "Okay, now I really am interested. What's going on?"

"Wait for a minute while I make a phone call." He walked away, leaving her frustrated and completely distracted from what the rest of the world was saying, and called the Keeler house. He explained to Mark what was going on and why he wanted to spill the beans early instead of the planned reveal that weekend, and her parents agreed to come over.

"Okay," he said, sitting back down beside her, "Just wait for a little while longer and I'll tell you what the surprise is. Or _show_ you, really."

She pestered him with questions while they waited, sounding more like a kid at Christmas than a grown woman expecting a kid of her own. When her family got there she pestered them, too, joined in by Becca. The youngest Keeler had no idea what was going on, either.

Sasha gave Kim the job of keeping Payson inside while he and Mark went out to the shed and uncovered their project. It took more than a little elbow grease to get it outside and settled into the right place, but finally they were ready for Payson.

Payson looked confused when he handed her a jacket, one that she actually just bought a few days prior. There were things that men never thought about, like the necessity of a maternity coat during winter. She buttoned it up over her growing belly and followed them outside.

It took her only seconds to spot the new piece of furniture in the yard. Tucked beneath the shelter of their largest oak tree was a picnic table, hand crafted by Sasha and Mark. It was stained dark and had carved legs and child-friendly rounded edges. Mark did all of the carpentry work while Sasha did the elaborate carvings, a skill taught to him by his bunic when he was a little boy.

Payson looked between Sasha and her father. "You made this?"

"We made it for you," Mark verified. "I just put a table together, but Sasha's the one who did all those carvings."

She tossed a cheeky grin at Sasha. "You just do a little bit of everything, don't you?"

"It's not a big deal. My bunic did it, made custom furniture, so he taught me to carve whenever I spent time in Romania. I've been doing it since I was a kid."

"It's wonderful, Sasha. Thank you so much." She kissed him, their usual song and dance—a kiss on the jaw from her, a kiss on the lips from him, but then she pressed a third, longer kiss to his lips. Behind her Mark raised his eyebrows. That was big for Mark, who in the past looked like he was going to punch Sasha during those kisses. Payson drew away and went to hug her father. "Thank you so much, Daddy. It's perfect."

Sasha held up a small carving tool and said, "It's not perfect yet. I've heard that carving initials is kind of a thing for you girls."

"I couldn't! I don't want to ruin something so beautiful."

"It's not ruining it, love. It's completing it. Go. Carve. We'll all do it too." He placed the tool in her hand and she sent an uncertain look to her father. Mark nudged her toward the table.

She brushed a loving hand across the top before she placed the tip of the tool against the wood and pressed down. There was a thick layer of varnish covering it so she had to dig hard, but she carved a PK into the top of the table and then added an AT right next to it. "You know, if we all do this we're going to have to find a way to distinguish the ATs. There's three of them."

Payson handed Sasha the carving tool next and he added his own initials to the tabletop. While he was doing it he suggested, "Maybe Austin and Ava can put their middle initials in, too. That way we'll know who's who."

"Brilliant," she said, beaming up at him. She raised on her toes and gave him another kiss, causing her father to raise his eyebrows again. If he kept that up his face was going to get stuck that way and he would look perpetually surprised. Payson was oblivious to her father's looks and said, "You're next, Dad. You and Sasha made it so you should be the first ones to put your initials in."

Mark carved his and then so did Kim and Becca. It wouldn't take long for the table to be covered in initials. The Tuckers and Nicky would add theirs in the next few days, and then the rest of their teams whenever they flew in next. Sasha was going to varnish over all the carvings again so that they would last, and Payson would have a constant reminder of her friends and family.

The idiots on twitter didn't matter, but this, the relationships she surrounded herself with, did. They would last forever, and if he couldn't set it in stone he would do the next best thing—set it in wood.

o-O-o

The phone had been ringing off the hook all week. Reporters were calling Kim to ask her questions that she wouldn't answer about the pregnancy and then questions that she would answer about the Pierre de Coubertine Medal. It was announced that Monday that Payson would be honored by the International Olympic Committee with the Coubertine medal, an award given to athletes who demonstrated the spirit of sportsmanship. It was a huge honor, one that only fifteen people in history had received. Payson would be the only person from the 2012 Olympics to get the medal.

Usually people won that award for a specific act of good sportsmanship—the last three recipients, for example, were a sailing team who lent out their boat when another team's mast broke—but Payson wasn't being honored for any one thing. The IOC's press release read, "Payson Keeler embodies the true spirit of sportsmanship with her every action. Throughout the Games she encouraged those around her to achieve their best, even if that best won one of the medals she was seeking. In fact, she gave two of her hard-earned gold medals to those that she felt better deserved them. When she won the silver medal in the Vault competition she was the first to congratulate gold medalist Ivanka Kirilenko and was Kirilenko's fiercest defender to the press. Her respect for the sport and for her colleagues is evidenced by her very presence at these Olympic Games and her goodwill under adversity."

There were quotes from fellow gymnasts included in the article, as well, and some of those brought tears to her eyes. In a time when so many people were criticizing Payson, it was moving to see how well respected she was within her own community.

"Competitive sports can be cutthroat," Andrea Conway said, "and you get used to that mindset—until you meet Payson. She wants to win, but she wants to win fairly and if she doesn't think something is fair she'll take steps to fix that. The gold medal that Payson gave me means more to me than even competing would have, because it's a great thing to know that someone cares about you that much."

Ivanka said that Payson made her remember why she loved gymnastics. "I have not been treated in such a way since I was a very young girl. She was very happy for me, very proud for me. She made me feel proud for myself. It was very hurtful when people said I did not deserve to win, but Payson said, you deserve it. No one has ever said that to me before."

Lauren's quote was the most moving of all. She has known for weeks that Payson would be getting the award, but she never gave away the secret. "You see the surface, that she gave me her medal," she said, "but nobody will ever know how deep that goes. It's not that she's a good sport, it's that she's a good person and that happens to spill over into gymnastics. Payson changed my life. When you know someone like Payson, or like Emily, you can't ever go back. They make you better."

Kim hung the article in her office to remind her how lucky she was when things got frustrating. She was trying to run the gym, plan the trip to Pennsylvania for the Parkettes invitational, and field hundreds of phone calls all at once and it was exhausting. When the phone rang for what seemed like the thousandths time, she glanced at that press release again to give her strength for what was to come.

"Rocky Mountain Gymnastics, how can I help you?" She learned the hard way not to include her name when she answered the phone.

"Hi Kim," a vaguely familiar voice said. "How are you doing?"

"Who is this?" It didn't come off as exactly polite, but if this was a reporter she didn't want to fall for any tricks.

There was a pause. "It's Summer."

Oh. That was unexpected. Summer sounded hurt that Kim didn't recognize her voice, but really why should she? It had been months since they spoke, ever since Sasha fired the younger woman for interfering in their lives. Kim heard about Summer's visit a couple of months ago from Payson and from Sasha, and neither had anything good to say about it. If the former manager was looking to apologize she was going to have a tough job of it. "Oh, hi Summer. I didn't recognize you. What can I do for you?"

"I just wanted to call and say how sorry I am." So she was going to apologize… but wait, "I can't imagine how hard this is for you and I know you must need support."

Surely she wasn't… "I'm sorry, but I don't know what you're talking about. How hard what is?"

"Payson's pregnancy," … she was. "I know you've been denying it to the press, but she can't hide it forever."

Kim cut off whatever hypocritical nonsense her former friend was about to say. "We're not denying anything."

It was true. Nobody associated with Payson had said that she wasn't pregnant. They just hadn't said that she _was_, either. Summer couldn't argue with the truth so she said, "Well, I just know how difficult this is. You must be devastated, but Payson is going to need a lot of help through this. Raising a baby is difficult in the best of situations, but when it was a mistake it will be so much harder."

Was it possible that Summer thought she was being helpful? Her tone implied that she was, but her words were anything but encouraging. Kim's own voice was steely when she said, "You're making a lot of assumptions here, Summer. Just because something is unexpected doesn't mean that it's a mistake. We're thrilled about this. Payson is happier than I've ever seen her. The appropriate sentiment here isn't I'm sorry, it's congratulations."

"You don't have to put on an act for me, Kim. Your eighteen year old daughter is having a child with one man and living with another. It's okay for you to be upset." The disturbing thing about Summer Van Horne was that she believed she was doing what was right. In her head, what she was saying was supposed to make Kim feel better.

"The only thing that is upsetting to me right now, Summer, is you talking about things you know nothing about. Am I concerned that Payson is having a baby when she's eighteen? No. If she were someone else I might be, but she's ready for this. I had her when I was eighteen and I think I did a pretty good job raising her. Since she's a lot more mature that I was at her age, I think she'll do just fine. Am I concerned that she sleeping with Austin? Not really. They love each other and he makes her happy. Am I concerned that she's living with Sasha? No. No to the fifth power. I'm _glad_ that they're living together. Whatever sordid story you've invented in your mind is wrong. They're friends and they're good for each other. If Austin doesn't have a problem with it then neither should anyone else."

Kim was surprise at the vehemence in her voice. She guessed that her frustration with all of the reporters finally boiled over and Summer was the unfortunate recipient of her anger. She was also surprised to find that she believed what she was saying. She hadn't always felt that way. She was upset about the pregnancy at first, but that was only when Payson was upset about it. When Payson began to love the baby and really take responsibility for it, Kim was happy for her. Alex gave new meaning to all their lives.

Kim also remembered a time when she really disapproved of Payson and Austin's relationship, and it wasn't very long ago, but the closer they got the less concerned she was. Once they moved past the bad beginnings they had a wonderful relationship, even if it was unconventional. Kim didn't know the details, but she knew that they were technically broken up but still slept together on occasion, and even that didn't bother her. They had an understanding and a relationship strong enough to handle the admittedly strange situation.

As for Payson and Sasha's living arrangement, she was adamantly opposed to it until they were actually in their new house. Then she saw what Payson said all along, that they worked so well together that it would be ridiculous to separate them. When Mark and Sasha teamed up to build a housewarming gift for Payson, all of Kim's reservations fled. If Mark could learn to get along with Sasha, she could accept them living together.

On the other end of the phone, Summer was in shock. Silence rang across the line, and when Summer did speak she was sniffling. She cried the last time Kim talked to her, too. She could dish out plenty but couldn't take any.

"I'm sorry, Kim. I'm not trying to offend you, but I just really don't understand how you could feel that way. I don't understand how you could approve of all the bad decisions she's made."

"That's right, Summer, you don't understand." Summer saw the world in black and white, so she would never understand the gray areas, much less the red, blue, and yellow areas of life. "You look at Payson and see bad decisions. I look at her and I see maturity. Maybe sleeping with Austin in the first place was a bad decision, I don't know, but she certainly wouldn't be the first teenager to make it. Ever since then she's done everything possible to make a good life for her child, and I think she's done a good job of it. But you will never understand that. I'm sorry, Summer, but I think in the future you should just stay out of our lives."

She felt a little guilty when she hung up the phone, because Summer had once been a good friend to her, but looking back she could see how hypocritical the other woman had always been. She switched men like she switched purses and willfully got engaged to a man she didn't love, _twice_, and she judged everyone else's actions but made every excuse possible for Lauren's bad behavior. Kim once thought that Summer would be good for Lauren, but now she could see that Summer only enabled the already struggling gymnast. What Lauren needed back then was for someone to hold her responsible like Payson did and to love her unconditionally like Emily did. At some point Lauren and Emily's original hatred had turned into a sisterly relationship—they bickered constantly but stood up for each other when things got bad. Kim had no doubt that the girls would soon be real sisters.

That was the high point of Kim's rather depressing train of thought about Summer: Steve and Lauren were free from her web of hypocrisy and would soon get the family that both wanted and needed. In the end everything turned out exactly like it should be.

o-O-o

It would be an interesting weekend, and for a lot of reasons. For one, they were going to an invitational that they didn't have a shot in hell of winning. He wasn't bothered by that and it wouldn't harm their reputation as a gym, but it was strange to go into a competition expecting to lose.

It was also the debut meet for Becca and Jess. They had both competed in the past, but never on this level or against gymnasts this good. A lot of the Parkettes' girls would be elite level, as were a few of the Rock's, so this was a practice run for the elite qualifier in February.

The most interesting aspects of the weekend, though, centered around Payson. Becca and Jess's debuts also meant the debut of Payson as a coach. If they did well her reputation would be cemented, but if they performed poorly she would have an uphill battle gaining respect as a coach. On top of that, it was the first time she would appear publicly without hiding her pregnancy. They weren't confirming it and she would go right back to her concealing clothes at the next public event, but coaching meant Rock clothes, and Rock clothes didn't hide her bump. She looked pregnant.

They checked into separate rooms, but they were conveniently adjoined. And by conveniently he meant purposefully. They reserved a block of rooms for their team and he made sure that his and Payson's were connected. Becca and Jess were sharing a room with no connecting doors because he didn't want them to be tempted into anything. Overnight competitions were notorious for being more of a slumber party than a competition, and Becca and Jess didn't need to get roped into that. Most serious elites outgrew the childish behavior, but since the two girls were in fact children he couldn't expect them to stand up to the peer pressure. A lot was riding on them doing well, and the best way to keep them well rested and focused was to keep them at least somewhat secluded from the other girls.

They all got to have fun mingling at the reception, though. At national or international events the receptions were large, elaborate, and semi-formal, but a friendly meet between two gyms was much more casual, and if Sasha was honest with himself, much more fun. The gymnasts got to play dress up and the coaches went along with it in good humor, and instead of schmoozing sponsors or reporters everyone talked to each other.

Payson's purple dress wasn't doing much to hide her pregnancy, but she didn't seem to care. She was taking it all in stride and refusing to admit that she was pregnant without ever denying it. When one woman asked her when she was due, Payson smiled and joked, "I don't know what you're talking about." She was so charming when she said it that the woman asking her chuckled and said, "I'm sorry, obviously I don't know what I'm talking about either. What I meant to say was that you look beautiful." The woman thought she was part of inside joke with Payson, but if she was it was a very large inside joke. The next time someone said something about the baby Payson pretended to be affronted and asked, "You think I look pregnant?" The man stared in shock for a few seconds and then burst into laughter. By the end of the night they were eating out of her hand.

It wasn't long after they performed bed check that Payson slipped into his room wearing a pair of leggings and a man's Rock t-shirt. It was a toss up by now if the shirt once belonged to him or to Austin. She completely ignored the fact that Sasha was changing clothes and went to sit on his bed.

"It's kind of weird to be on this side of the bed check," she said.

He finished pulling on his pajamas and joined her on the bed. "What, are you expecting to get in trouble for sleeping in a boy's room?"

"A little bit, yeah."

"I think if you were going to get in trouble it would have been in the Olympic Village when you were doing a lot more that sleeping with Austin."

She scoffed. "That doesn't count. You're expected to screw around at the Olympics. It's a miracle that more of us weren't doing it."

She was right. He was surprised while they were in London by how little sex was going on. The girls were usually under strict control at the Games because they were almost always minors, but the men traditionally had a pretty free rein. Sasha probably hooked up with more women in Sydney than he had in the whole rest of his life combined, but for the most part that didn't happen for the American team this year. Max was the notable exception, but there were issues there other than just being young and horny. Even Max didn't come close to living up to Sasha's prodigious record, though.

Payson called him out. "You were one of those guys, weren't you? I can tell by the look on your face. Very self-satisfied."

"I am not self-satisfied," he insisted. "Casual sex is nothing to be proud of."

"Yeah, except that you are. Geez, with the player you used to be I can only imagine. You probably woke up in a bed with a tangle of women around you."

"Actually… yeah." She was joking, but she was also right on the money.

In the past she would have been shocked to hear him admit that, but she stopped being shocked by things a while back. Now she rolled her eyes, shook her head, and said, "Such a man whore. I don't know why I put up with you."

"Probably because I rub your back when it hurts. If I didn't do that you'd kick me to the curb."

Once he put the idea in her mind, the conversation ended with him giving her an actual backrub. He had a working knowledge of the muscles in the human body from having coached for so long, and the expectations for coaching in Romania were a lot higher than they were in England or America. He knew the basics of athletic training and sports psychology and had made frequent use of both over the years. Giving backrubs was just the latest way he was using his trainer's skills.

They talked for a couple of hours and then settled down beside each other in the bed. He missed her sleeping on top of him, but since that wouldn't be an option for the next several months they settled for the next best thing. If they were going to stay awake for a while they laid facing each other. If they were going straight to sleep he slept curled behind her. Tonight he laid down against her back and wrapped his arms around her from behind. Sometimes when he did that he got to feel Alex kicking against his hand, which he loved. That never got old.

He kissed the back of her neck and went to sleep, and when he woke up several hours later it was to an oddly familiar situation: Payson having an orgasm. The first time it happened it freaked him out, although according to Payson it wasn't the first time it happened, just the first time he woke up for it. He thought that he must have been doing something to bring her to orgasm, but that particular time he wasn't. She came in her sleep from nothing but her dreams. There were times when she came and it _was_ his doing, and then times when she was using her own hands, which is what happened tonight.

She was awake, but he waited until her breathing slowed and her eyes focused before he spoke. "I know this is the wrong question to be asking right now, but I've been curious. Are you asleep when you do that or do you wake up and do it on purpose?"

He didn't need to clarify. They both knew the orgasms weren't on purpose, but he was wondering if she was finishing it by conscious thought or not. "It's not that simple," she said, still panting. "Sometimes I'm asleep, and sometimes in that kind of half waking state where I don't really know what I'm doing. I've only done it on purpose once."

"When you were in bed with me?"

"Yeah," she said, managing to add a non verbal 'duh' with her expression. "If it'd been with Austin I would have brought him along for the ride."

She was, in the technical meaning of the term, using Austin. She only had sex with him when her need got too much to handle, and they went right back to normal the next morning. As screwed up as the arrangement sounded, it worked for them, probably because their relationship evolved in such a bizarre way. After what they'd been through together they could handle anything.

"So if you knew what you were doing," Sasha said, continuing their conversation, "why did you do it? That's pushing the limits even for us."

"I was _really_ desperate," she said. "You were asleep, so figured what you didn't know wouldn't hurt you."

"And tonight?"

"Not on purpose. I woke up mid-orgasm and it was totally your fault."

He wasn't following. There were definitely times when Payson coming in her sleep was his fault, but he didn't see how this time was. "You're going to have to explain that, because I don't know what you mean."

"I was dreaming about you with a bunch of other women, because we were talking about it earlier. Your fault."

He did not understand these dreams she had. He got the regular sex ones, and could even stretch so far as to say that he understood the threesome ones or the ones with Lauren, but he didn't understand why she got turned on by dreams about him or Austin being with other women. It concerned him a little, so he asked, and not for the first time, "Are you sure this is normal?"

She chuckled, still a little low and sultry from her orgasm, and said, "Definitely sure. My mom was even the one who warned me about it in the first place. Weird, but normal."

She rolled out of bed. "I'm feeling a little overheated after that, so I'm going to take a cold shower. Maybe you should take one, too. Or a hot one, whatever."

Only did then he realize that he was sporting an erection. Since he started sleeping with Payson he got so used to being turned on that he didn't always notice anymore. Payson was incredibly casual about it. He used to be embarrassed when she made comments about him wanking, but he got over that pretty quickly. It wasn't even jokes, it was suggestions, like, "I'm going to make breakfast. You might want to take care of that before you come downstairs."

The thing was, they were usually good suggestions, so he followed them. He did have a hot shower, and when she came back to bed a little while later he was sans hard on. Of course, when he woke up the next morning he had to repeat the ritual.

The meet was in the morning so that they could fly back to Boulder that afternoon, so they were all out of bed early to get to the gym. When they got there he expected to see Kaylie, who made the short trip from New York, but he was surprised to find Andrea Conway there as well. He shouldn't have been; her hometown of Boston wasn't that far away and she was really close with the other 2012 girls.

Her greeting reminded him of just why they all liked her so much. She hugged Payson and gave her and excited "Congratulations!" but she never asked any questions or resented the fact that Payson didn't tell her sooner. Andy and Beth were both like that. They were universally happy and neither had a nosy bone in their bodies.

Payson couldn't talk long because she was there for work, but they managed a quick conversation while the gymnasts stretched out. Sasha was standing nearby so he heard snippets of what they were saying. From Payson he heard, "We're so happy," and the word "Alex." Kaylie had a new boy to talk about, and he heard Andy say the favorite word of all newly-retired gymnasts: "dessert."

They didn't talk long, because Payson wasn't about to shirk her duties as a coach. Her friends went to sit in the stands while the competition got underway.

He and Payson were perfect for tag team coaching. Juniors and seniors needed different things from their coaches and he and Payson had the complementing personalities to fulfill those needs. Payson worked with the younger girls and would eventually coach all junior elites, teaching them both skills and self-confidence, and he coached the senior elites to perfect their skills and give them the discipline they needed. His job was about to get a whole lot easier with someone as expert as Payson coaching the juniors, because they would come up with great execution already.

The difference between them was obvious already. Sasha was focusing on the gymnastics for his girls, and Payson was focusing on the mental game for hers. Most mistakes made by younger gymnasts had less to do with skills and more to do with nerves, so Payson made sure that Becca and Jess were confident in their abilities.

The Rock got decimated, as they knew they would, but Jess ended up being the star of the meet. At just a month short of twelve, Jessica Torres placed a close second to Junior National Champion Amanda Smithson and ahead of two other members of the current Junior National Team. Jess made a splash and so did Payson. With Jess's silver and Becca's very respectable ninth place finish, Payson was established as the coach to want. There would be an influx of new juniors applying to the Rock soon.

They took the team out to lunch, finally allowing Payson to spend time chatting with her friends, but when they got back to the hotel Sasha went into his room and straight through the door to Payson's. He pulled her into a hug and said, "I'm so, so proud of you."

"I was so nervous," she admitted.

"Really? You looked so calm."

"Now you know why nobody noticed anything at Nationals last year. I'm really good at putting up walls."

He hadn't noticed then and he didn't notice today, and that bothered him. Payson was an enigma. She was a crap liar but a great actress, an open book sometimes and impenetrable fortress others. He understood her better than anyone in the world, but there was still so much about her that baffled him.

"Can you not do that anymore?" he asked. "It really scares me that you can shut off like that and none of us know. Tell me so that I can help."

She laid her head against his chest and sighed. "I'm sorry. I don't mean to do it. Old habits just die hard, I guess. Before I met you I did this a lot, hiding what I was feeling. Sometimes it sneaks back in."

"You don't have to hide anything from me Payson."

She tilted her head up to kiss him and said, "I know. So now I'm not hiding from you how much I want to go home. Is it time yet?"

She was half teasing to break out of the melancholy discussion, and half serious. She wanted to go home. Time at home was rare for her during weekends, and she didn't want to waste a single minute that she could be there.

"Not yet, but almost. Get everything ready and by the time you're done it will probably be time to leave."

He headed to his room to do the same thing, but she caught his hand and pulled him back. "No more secrets," she promised. "From now on I'll tell you everything."

o-O-o

"Payson!"

There was a short list of people with Russian accents that would be at Payson's Pierre de Coubertine Medal ceremony, so Sasha wasn't surprised when Payson's voice rang out, "Ivanka!"

He turned around in time to see the girls rush into an embrace and caught the confused looks on the faces of her teammates, with the notable exception of Lauren. That friendship formed after the other girls left the Olympic Village, and the subject never came up between the Americans. He guessed Payson or Lauren could have said, "Of, fyi, we're friends with Ivanka and Elisabeta now," but that would have been weird and forced.

When they separated Ivanka placed her hands on either side of Payson's swollen stomach and said, "Oh my God."

"I know," Payson said, and for some reason that reply made sense to the two girls.

"I did not truly believe until now."

"Well, I have no comment on the subject," Payson joked, and both girls laughed. Ivanka was in the same kind of spotlight in Russia that Payson was in back home. Both gymnasts knew what it was like to have the media hounding you. "But what I can tell you," Payson continued, "is that I'm incredibly happy with my life right now."

By now, not confirming the pregnancy was one big joke at the media's expense. Payson got tired of the hassle of hiding her belly, and twenty five weeks pregnant was a lot harder to cover than the twenty two weeks she was for her last non-work related public appearance. The dress she was wearing for the ceremony was tight fitting so there was no doubt that she was pregnant, but she refused to verify it for the press.

Lauren gave her friends their moment together, but she didn't wait long before she joined them. There was another hug exchanged, and then another conversation to follow where they caught up on what had happened for the last few months. They e-mailed occasionally, but only so much could be conveyed in an e-mail.

Austin came to stand by Sasha. "If I told you a year ago that Lauren and Payson would be friends with Ivanka Kirilenko, what would you have said?"

"I would have told you to go take some medicine, because you obviously had a fever that was making you hallucinate. But by now I've pretty much figured out that I know nothing about women and shouldn't even make guesses."

"Good point," the younger man conceded. "So explain to me why we're in Switzerland to honor Payson, who lives in Colorado. Shouldn't they come to her?"

Sasha snorted. "The IOC never comes to anyone. They paid for us to get here, which is about as generous as the IOC will ever get."

"Speak for yourself. They paid for Payson, you, the Keelers, and the women's team. I had to pay for myself. I paid for Steven and Jake, too, but don't tell them that. They think the NGO sprung for it since it's such a huge honor for USA gymnastics."

"I wonder how they got an idea like that." Both men were Oklahoma University gymnasts, so they weren't allowed to take sponsorship money. They didn't have the kind of cash flow that Nicky and Austin had, and they wouldn't have accepted the travel expenses from any of their teammates. The NGO fib worked for everybody. The gymnastics organization should have actually done it rather than just getting the credit for it, anyway.

The reception before the ceremony was an endless circle of greeting strangers. There were hundreds of people there; Payson knew maybe two dozen of them. He and Austin tried to make sure that one of them was always with her to intimidate the people who wanted to ask her overly personal questions, but every once in a while they couldn't, so the other men stepped in. It mostly worked, but there was the occasional person who ignored the glaring men beside her and asked anyway. Everyone who asked about the pregnancy got a sarcastic response, but said in such a way that couldn't be taken as offensive. The people who asked her about her health got varied responses which depended on how well she knew the person. The strangers got a fake smile and "I'm doing much better, thanks." Kevin got more details than anyone.

The other coach hadn't seen Payson since he was in Boulder after Austin's disastrous talk with his parents, so they had a lot to discuss. Some of it couldn't be discussed in public at all, and then some of it was just mildly inappropriate to talk about in mixed company. One of those topics was her health.

"I'm doing so much better," she told him, obviously excited. "I had a transfusion yesterday, we scheduled it so that I would be as healthy as possible flying overseas, and it was the first one for six weeks. My hematologist said that if the medicine keeps working I might be off the transfusions altogether around the first of the year."

There were people eavesdropping, but for once Payson didn't care. Now that she was getting better she didn't feel the need to be so secretive about her illness. Nobody outside of their tight knit group would ever know full details, but now that the risk of her dying had mostly passed she was less concerned with people knowing the general facts.

When Elisabeta Patrescu arrived, late because her plane was delayed, the girls repeated the scene from earlier. Elisa had much the same reaction to Payson's pregnancy as Ivanka had, and they all laughed at Payson's evasiveness. Someone had the idea to take a picture of the four of them to match the one hanging in Sasha's office (and sitting in his living room, too). Lauren tweeted it and within minutes there were tweets coming in about Payson's obvious baby bump. Sasha's favorite was_ Are were really still pretending like #PayK isn't pregnant? What, she's hiding a pillow under there?_

For the most part the actual ceremony was just as boring as the reception. A bunch of IOC officials gave long speeches that said a lot of flattering things about their organization and almost nothing about Payson, and then there was some official traditional stuff that always accompanied the opening of an IOC event. The saving grace of that part was that the food was good.

After the last speech wound to a close, the lights were dimmed and a large screen was lowered from the ceiling. The video they played was not a normal part of any IOC honor ceremony, but Lauren engineered the project and used her dad's money and her considerable skills of flattery to get it included in the night.

It was fantastic. Lauren was friends with a film production major and got him put together the clips—official video from the Trials and Olympics of Payson cheering on her teammates, amateur shots from the gym of her helping the other girls work on a skill or teaching the little kids, clips of the most notable experiences from the Olympics like her giving her medals to Andy and Lauren, shaking Ivanka's hand after the vault finals, and pulling Emily and Genghi up on the gold medal podium with her after the bars final. Over it all there was a score track and voiceovers of people talking about her.

Most of the people speaking thought the video was for the Rocky Awards, which were supposed to be this weekend. The event got pushed off in favor of this ceremony, but the same video would probably be used there, too. There were interviews from all of her teammates, from her family, then from Ivanka and quotes from the US commentators.

Over a clip of Payson leaning against Sasha to start Lauren's standing ovation during qualifying, Tim Daggett's voice said, "I've never seen anything like these American girls. They truly want to see the best from each other. Payson Keeler has set the standard in modern gymnastics, but I guarantee you that she wants every gymnast out there to take that challenge and beat her. She wants to see people achieve the impossible."

A quote from Kaylie said, "Payson is one of the best people I've ever know, and I've been lucky enough to see her grow into that. When she first came to the Rock she was this really shy, really focused kid who didn't even notice what was going on around her, but the older she got the more she opened up. Emily is the heart of our group, but Payson has_ always _been the soul. We never could have made it to the Olympics without her."

Kelly said, "It's funny, for years all I could think about was beating Payson, but when she became impossible to beat is was almost freeing. I got to know her and the other girls, and I realized that there was something so much more important than winning. Payson always knew that. She knew that the only way to really win was to do it with friends, and that without them the medals weren't even worth it. It's stupid to say because we're nearly the same age, but she's really been a role model to me."

When the lights came up Payson was crying. She hugged Lauren, Andy, and Ivanka, the only ones allowed to sit at the head table with her, and then moved to the next table to hug all of her friends and family. There were a few frustrated faces in the crowd because they had not allowed time for this in the schedule, and Sasha wanted to remind them that this was the very reason she was getting the Coubertine medal.

She hugged her sister the longest and the tightest before she sat back down, and as soon as she was in her seat a man was up at the podium to get the train rolling again. He gave a long winded introduction before calling Payson to the stage to accept her award. Payson cried when he placed the medal around her neck, just like she did for all six of the medals she received in London. Even though she was used to winning awards, she never took it for granted. She was proud of each and every medal she had ever won.

She blotted beneath her eyes with her father's handkerchief and joked, "You really should have played the video _after_ this so that I wouldn't be crying so hard." She reigned in her emotions and continued more seriously. "I am so incredibly honored to receive the Pierre de Coubertine Medal, but the real credit belongs to my parents. If my behavior in London was in any way extraordinary it was because of them. All I did was live my life according to the principles they taught me—to respect those around me, to be thankful for what I've been given, to remember that people are _always_ more important than medals. I didn't always believe them, because I was a kid and I was stupid, but I was lucky enough to have my amazing teammates and friends to help me realize that my parents were right, as they probably are the vast majority of the time.

"Kelly said earlier that there are more important things than winning, and I probably know that better than most because I've been blessed with so many things that _are_ more important. I've been lucky enough to win, too, but I never could have done that without the support of so many others. So thank you. Thank you mom and dad for teaching me how to live my life. Thank you Becca for being a constant source of love and support. Sasha, for believing in me when I didn't believe in myself. Austin, for loving me even when I was at my worst and for giving me the greatest gift of my life. I love you so much, babe. Thank you Lauren and Kaylie for accepting me and for all the times you've made me laugh, and Emily for reminding us all how much we need each other. Thank you Kelly for being willing to forget all the times we were horrible to each other. Thank you Andy and Beth for believing in me, for giving up the chance of a lifetime for me, and for generally being two of the most awesome people ever. And Evie and Elisa, for reminding me that we are never alone in this crazy journey. Thank you Nicky, Jake, and Steven for being the brothers I never had. Thank you Kevin for adopting me into your family, and Ava for accepting me into yours. You, all of you, lifted me onto that podium. I didn't win. _We_ won."

Payson held up her medal with her triumphant last words, starting a thunderous round of applause. The NGO and IOC would both be pissed that she didn't mention them, but the media would eat up the entire speech, especially the part about Austin giving her the greatest gift of her life. That was as close as she'd yet come to admitting her pregnancy, and it was the best first public statement that she could have made. MJ had mentioned that before, that Payson sometimes did or said the right thing by accident. She meant what she said about Alex being the greatest gift of her life, but it happened to be the right thing for the media to hear, too. The public needed to know that Payson wanted the baby, that he wasn't some accident that she would resent for the rest of her life. Her words left no doubt; she loved her child.

That night the men hung out in the hotel bar while the girls gathered together in Payson and Austin's room for 'girl talk.' Sasha took that to mean they were talking about boys, and he wondered how much Becca's presence in the room would deter them from talking about sex. He hoped entirely since Payson could say a fair bit about him if she wanted to.

His hopes were dashed soon after by a text and a tweet. Payson texted Austin to ask him if he would mind sleeping in Nicky's room that night so the girls could all sleep together in their room. He grumbled about why they couldn't sleep in one of the other girls' room but said yes, and then a few minutes later a photo popped up on twitter via Lauren. It was a picture of ten girls—the seven from Team USA, Ava, Elisa, and Ivanka—dressed in pajamas and crowded together on one king sized bed—and accompanied by the caption _Kicking #ATuck08 out of his room for a slumber party in Switzerland. _What worried Sasha was that Becca was nowhere in sight.

He texted Payson and asked about it, and she texted back, _She went back 2 her room. Mom thought we would b a bad influence on her._

Sasha was concerned about the lack of censorship in the group, but he had to admit that Kim had a point. Ten girls aged seventeen to nineteen were not an appropriate crowd for the relatively innocent fourteen year old to be hanging out with.

Nobody was giggling the next morning, which he took to be a good sign, but he would probably be paranoid from then on. He loved everyone of his girls, but for once he was glad to say goodbye to them. They would be back in less than a week for the holidays anyway, and by that time he hoped his embarrassment would have passed. If he could wrangle out of Payson what they actually talked about last night the embarrassment would pass even faster. Unless, of course, the answer was the one he didn't want to hear. Maybe it was better to never ask.

o-O-o

Sasha didn't entirely understand Thanksgiving, but he would take any excuse to get Payson baking pies.

Of course, there was so much more than just pies. There was a turkey, and a ham, and dressing, and three different kinds of potatoes, and squash, etc, etc, etc. When Payson asked if he would mind having Thanksgiving at their house since it was bigger than her parents', he had no idea that it would involve this much work.

The reasonable thing to do would have been to have it at Kaylie or Lauren's house, since both were more equipped for huge gatherings, but the Cruz house was up for sale after the divorce and the Tanners were in the middle of combining two families, which took a lot more work when the decorating styles were as different as Chloe and Steve's. Austin's house was big but the epitome of a bachelor pad, so Sasha and Payson had the honor/horror of hosting a dinner for nineteen in their home.

The dining room wasn't big enough so they were having it in the den. That meant that Sasha, Mark, Austin, and Nicky got the pleasure of moving all the normal furniture out, setting up a group of folding tables that spanned the room, and moving every chair in the house to sit around it. The tables didn't look bad when the women draped a huge table cloth over them, but the chairs looked ridiculous. Payson assure him that was fine. "Mismatched chairs are part of the Thanksgiving tradition."

The men escaped out to the work shed before they could be asked to do anything else. Sasha didn't feel remotely guilty about that. There were eleven other people coming over, and they could do some of the work themselves.

Alex Cruz was the next person to join them, and he stopped dead when he came inside. At first Sasha assumed that he was surprised by the unusual layout of the shed, which was an actual work area on one end and a "man cave" as Payson called it at the other end. It turned out that wasn't why he was so shocked. "Seriously, _Family Feud_? You're men, it's Thanksgiving. You're supposed to be watching football."

Austin responded, "Well, I hate football, Nicky doesn't care, and Sasha's confused by it, so we chose this instead."

"I'm still not clear on that," Mark said, "Why do you hate football?"

"I lived in Dallas for years, which is like an altar for football worshipers. It got old really fast. Give me hockey any day."

Other men filtered in through the next few hours, although Kaylie's dad was the only one offended by their choice of a game show marathon over football. In fact, when Damon and Brian arrived the younger Kmetko said, "Sweet, Family Feud. I love this show!"

Payson and Kim came in around noon carrying two plates of food each. Kim handed hers to Mark and Nicky while Payson gave plates to Sasha and Austin and said, "If the rest of you want lunch you can come in and earn it. You have to work for your food around here."

"They've been here way longer than us!" Damon cried. "How come they get food?"

Payson slid her arms around Sasha's shoulders while she stood behind him and said, "Our men have already done their work. They moved all the furniture. If you want us to feed you the least you can do is set the table or wash some dishes."

She leaned down to kiss Sasha on the cheek and moved to kiss Austin as well, then she and Kim left, dragging a reluctant group of men behind them. Not long after they left Leo Cruz came in carrying a sandwich to match the ones Payson and Kim just delivered. "Man, you are so lucky that you got to move furniture," he said. "Kaylie caught me on my way in and made me polish silverware. I didn't even know that people still used real silver to eat with."

Sasha frowned. "Where did it come from?" He was almost certain that he and Payson didn't own real silverware.

"That's the worst part," Leo said. "It's my mom's, so I can't hate the person responsible. That's really all you've got when you have to do something like that, the hate."

Sasha laughed because it was so true. The driving thought that gets you through an unpleasant task was how much you hate the person making you do it. He harbored a lot of hate toward Viola when he was younger because she made him do excruciating ballet exercises. In the end his gymnastics was better for it, though.

Damon, Brian, Alex Cruz, and Steve Tanner didn't make another appearance in the work shed. It seemed that the women were making them pay for trying to skive off the work, and Sasha didn't see them again until he came in for dinner.

There was no way in hell they could eat all that food. The dining room table was covered with various desserts, some of which he'd never seen before—something pink and fluffy, for example, which Payson told him was a fruit salad. He could see the fruit if he looked really hard. Then the main table, or tables if he was being technical, held more dishes than he had ever seen in one place.

The girls, finally finished with the preparations, were taking a tour of the house. They all left Boulder before he and Payson bought the house, so this was the first time for them to see it. The adults of the group seemed oddly unperturbed that he and Payson were living together; their living situation wasn't widely known, so he could only guess that their children told them what to expect.

Payson was standing with her friends in front of a line of trophy cases that filled an entire wall of their den. Lauren leaned closer to look at one particular section and said, "I think that might be the largest number of Olympic medals ever together in one place."

"Actually we're tied with Michael Phelps," Payson said. "We'll have to wait until Rio to top him."

There were four frames holding medals from three Olympics; six from Sasha in Sydney, five from Austin in Beijing, and six from Payson and five from Austin in London. The total of twenty two was, as Lauren said, very well one of the largest collections of Olympic medals in the world. If you counted Payson Coubertine medal it probably _was _the largest.

"Why are Austin's here, too?" Kaylie asked. She was bending to read the inscription on a very large trophy which happened to belong to Austin.

"Well, for a couple of reason. One, I want Alex to grow up seeing his dad's trophies next to mine, and two, Austin will probably spend more time here than his own house after the baby is born, so it's fitting that all of his medals would be over here."

Kelly cast as doubtful look at her friend. "You are aware that your life is well and truly fucked up, right?"

A long pause, and then… "Yeah. I really am."

The group broke apart after that awkward exchange to join their families for dinner. Before they ate they went around the table and said what they were thankful for, which apparently was a tradition, and Kim thought it was a good idea to have the non-American of the group start off. He blushed and stuttered and was embarrassed as hell as he said, "Well, uh, I suppose I'm thankful for this." He waved his arm to indicate the people gathered around him. "It's been a long time since I've had any kind of family."

Payson squeezed his hand beneath the table, so he knew he said the right thing. Nobody else seemed to be embarrassed when they answered, though. Payson said, "I think we all know what I'm thankful for." A few of her friends laughed, because it was so obvious. "I'm thankful for the baby and I'm thankful that I'm getting better."

Austin, on Payson's other side, kissed her hand and said, "I'm thankful for the exact same things."

It took a while to for all nineteen people to give their answers, but a few stood out. Emily said that she was thankful that her mom was so happy, Damon said that he was thankful for Emily, and Lauren said, "I'm thankful that I can actually eat this stuff for the first time in my life!"

Mark, the last person to speak because he was on Sasha's left, said the best thing that Sasha heard all night. "I'm thankful that I no longer feel the need to kill Austin or Sasha." That set Payson to laughing and they had to wait until she calmed down to start eating.

During dinner Payson subtly took Austin's hand and pressed it against her stomach. He leaned over to kiss her neck and tilted his head against hers. Sasha was the only person close enough to hear the exchanged 'I love you's and then, after a slight pause, Austin saying, "I miss you."

"Me too," she sighed. "I wish things could be different."

They saw each other every day, so the only way they could possibly miss each other was, uh, _intimately_. The thing was, Sasha wasn't aware that they stopped doing that. Last he checked they were still sleeping together on occasion, but this implied that they weren't, and that it had been a while since they stopped. He was almost tempted to ask her about it, but that involved more information than he really wanted to know, so he put it out of his mind and went back to eating.

By the time dinner was over, the food that Sasha was sure they couldn't even make a dent in was nearly gone. He thought the girls would pass out they were so full, but they had enough energy to all trek out to the backyard and carve their initials into the picnic table. They _didn't_ have enough energy to go home. Lauren and Emily slept with Payson in her bed, Kaylie and Kelly slept in what would eventually be Austin's room, and poor Austin was forced to go home because he had no place to sleep. Ava said the slumber party in Switzerland was enough girl talk to last her the next seven years, so she went back to the house she shared with Austin and Nicky.

When Sasha went to bed he thought that he still didn't entirely understand Thanksgiving, and he was dreading the cleanup work he would have to do the next day, but altogether it wasn't that bad. He could get used to celebrating American holidays.

* * *

><p>AN: Long chapter=long author's note.

I have no modesty, so I'm willing to say when I'm proud of something I written. One of the top things on that list is managing to get "chasing the weasel around the mulberry bush," #HonoraryBlackPerson, and Slam Book all within a 50 word span :D

Bunic is Romanian for grandpa.

I came across the Pierre de Coubertine medal while I was researching something else, and it seemed like a perfect fit for Payson based on all the stuff she did at the Olympics. I love it when things just pop into the story like that.

Before I forget, there is a picture of Payson's dress on my pinterest, as well as pictures from the New York Contemporary Ballet event last chapter. I keep forgetting to tell ya'll that.


	78. Chapter 78

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

A/N: Okay, so this fell a little short of the promised 10,000 word chapter, but there is a reason for that. The next 10,000 words kind of need to be all in one chapter, and big things are going to happen in it :D

* * *

><p>Sasha had only been around for the Rocky Awards once, but he took Kim's word for it that this was the largest one they'd ever had.<p>

The parents of the Rock's team members always came, but a lot of the less intensive students sometimes came with only one parent or sometimes even by themselves. This year every single parent RSVPed as coming, and the difference had a lot to do with why the awards were being held so late in the year.

The Rockys were usually held in August, but the girls were just coming off the Olympics at that point and it was too soon for another big event. Since Emily and Lauren were being pulled away from school for press obligations way too often already, they scheduled the awards the weekend before Thanksgiving, when they could reasonably spend a few days in Boulder. As Lauren explained it to Sasha, a lot of kids skipped the Monday and Tuesday leading up to Thanksgiving anyway, so it wouldn't be a big deal if they went to class a little tired those days. They did go to class tired, of course, but not because of the Rockys. The awards got pushed off again for Payson's much more important Pierre de Coubertine Medal ceremony in Switzerland. Now the girls were out of school for the semester and free to come home for a couple of weeks, so they were finally hosting the Rocky Awards, now four months late.

The year before the Rock housed the National Champion and two other National Team members. To serious gymnasts this was huge, but to the everyday person it was not that big of a deal. They just didn't understand. It was like, oh, you're a national champion, that's so nice. But everyone understood how important the Olympics were. To be in the same room with six current Olympic Champions was something that these parents could talk about for the rest of their lives, especially when one of them was Payson Keeler, the greatest gymnast of all time.

The greatest gymnast of all time who was going to be late if she didn't hurry up.

She wanted to take a bath, of all things. She said that if she was going to be stuck in a room with a hundred parents fawning over her, she at least wanted to be relaxed for it. The problem was that she couldn't get in and out of the slippery bathtub by herself anymore. She needed somebody to hang onto for leverage, and the convenient person for that job was Sasha.

She was impossible to say no to, as he learned a long time ago. "It's not that big of a deal," she said. "You've seen me naked before. This really isn't any different."

She was wrong, of course, because it was completely different. Those other time's they were across the room from each other. This time he had his hands all over her bare skin while he helped her settle her now ungainly body into the tub, and he was about to have his hands all over her bare, _wet_ skin.

He knocked on the frame of the door as he opened it, saying, "Payson, we're going to be la—" His words trapped in his throat as he caught sight of Payson doing something that he definitely was _not_ supposed to see her doing.

He knew she did it. They'd talked about it. They'd even both done it while the other one knew, but seeing it happen was different. He didn't have a problem with her masturbating in her sleep while she was in bed with him, but for some reason he still blushed whenever he heard her during the day or when she left her vibrator out on the nightstand or by the bathroom sink. It was like there was a line drawn in his head between what was acceptable at night and what was acceptable during the day, but this went beyond either. He could wake up to her getting herself off a hundred times and that still wouldn't compare to seeing it with his own eyes.

He was humiliated, but Payson wasn't embarrassed. She didn't even stop what she was doing. Not bothering to open her eyes she said, "Come back in five minutes, Sasha. Unless you want to stay and watch."

He ignored the joke and fled from the room. Sometimes it drove him nuts how casual she was about stuff like that, and he didn't understand it one bit. She used to be so self conscious about her body, so how did she get to the point that she would touch herself in front of him and not even bat an eyelash?

She said to come back in five minutes. He gave her ten and then waited after he knocked on the door until she called him in. She looked at him like he was being an idiot.

"Sasha, if we're going to live together it's inevitable that we're going to catch each other in the act. It's not that big of a deal."

"We should at least keep some boundaries, Payson. But can we have this discussion when you're wearing clothes?"

She rolled her eyes but said, "Fine, whatever. Come help me up."

Getting out of the bathtub was a lot more difficult than getting in it. Getting out of chairs was difficult for Payson now, with all her weight shifted to the front, but trying to get up off the floor in an enclosed space where everything is slippery would have been near impossible alone. He was able to put aside all of his discomfort with the situation since Payson really did need help.

She slipped a robe on and started putting on her makeup while the water drained. Sasha sat on the edge of the tub to talk to her. "Pay, we have to have some lines here. Things have gotten too blurry as it is."

"But that's the thing," she said as she brushed powder across her face, "It is too blurry. There aren't any lines left, and if there are any they're zigzagged or twisting so they don't mean anything. It's okay for me to masturbate when we're in bed together but not when I'm in the bathtub? Don't you think that's backward?"

"It is. It's completely backward, but you're not doing it consciously at night. I'm not saying don't do it; I'm just saying don't do it where I could walk in on you."

She turned to face him, eyeshadow covering only one eye. "I get what you're saying, Sasha, but answer this—do you honestly lock the door every single time?"

"No, not every time," he hedged. The truth was that he almost never locked the door, because it just never occurred to him.

"I do your laundry, so there are some things you just can hide from me. I know that you masturbate in bed sometimes. Now think about this—how many times, on the nights that we didn't sleep together, have I come into your room and got into bed with you early in the morning? I could have walked in on you any one of those times."

She went back to putting on her make up while he pondered what she said. She was right. He never thought about how easy it would be for her to walk in on him. "Okay, you have a point, but this was different. You knew I was coming back in here."

"Yeah, but I didn't think you were going to just barge in here," she said. "I thought you were going to come back when I called for you."

Damnit, he hated when she made good arguments. "Payson, I don't know what to do here. We need some limits."

"We have limits. We're not having sex, we're not kissing, we're not fooling around other than the stuff we can't control. But we're human, and if I can say this without being horribly conceited, we're both very attractive people. If taking care of ourselves helps then that _is_ the line. That's the thing that we don't cross."

Sasha dropped his head into his hand. "So our line is wanking? Christ, Payson, our relationship is so messed up."

She frowned. "I think I'm the common factor here. My first kiss had this huge secret past with Kelly, my first boyfriend was bisexual, and then you know how complicated everything with Austin is. I think I'm just incapable of having a normal relationship."

"Didn't you tell your mum once that she needed to realize that you weren't normal and never had been?" he reminded her.

"Sometimes I wish I was," she whispered. She'd never wished that before, and he was concerned about the sudden melancholy surrounding her.

"What's wrong, Payson?"

She turned away from the mirror to face him again and asked, "What's missing with me and Austin? We're in love, and not the cookie cutter candy and flowers kind of love that everybody's looking for now. It's real love, the kind that my parents have, and we're _so_ good together. So why is it that we both know it won't work? Did the beginning really mess us up so much that it's ruined everything for us?"

He wasn't clear on how the conversation took such a drastic turn, but Payson was really upset about this. She and Austin both put up a strong front, but their break up was really hurting them. Sasha stood and pulled her into a hug. "I don't know why, Pay, but I know it's not because of how things started. You've moved past that and so has Austin. I wish I could give you a reason but I just don't have one."

"Don't get me wrong," she said, laying her head on his shoulder, "I don't regret a single thing that's happened, but what's my future? What man could ever live up to you and Austin?"

"You'll just have to lower your standards."

He prided himself on his talent for making Payson laugh at all times, and it worked just as well this time as it always had before. She was still sad, but joking helped and seeing her friends would help even more, so he reminded her, "What I came in here to say when I, uh, interrupted you was that we're going to be late. Finish getting ready and we can go see the other girls."

He watched as she finished putting on her make up and did her hair, a bit fascinated by the process, and then followed her back into the bedroom. Her dress was already laying out, but she said, "Would you go get my shoes out of the closet for me?"

"Payson, you have hundreds of shoes. How am I supposed to know which ones to get?" It wasn't an exaggeration. A shoe company sponsored her, so she had several dozen pairs from them that she had to wear to events, and then she was always buying others herself. There were at least two hundred pairs in there, and a whole wall of her walk in closet was devoted to shelving them.

"They're the black studded pumps." Of course they were. Shoe-aholic Payson could never wear just plain black shoes.

He went into her massive closet, which was almost as big as her bedroom, and was once again awed by how full it was. Payson's wardrobe used to consist of leos, jeans, and t-shirts. Now she could probably wear something different everyday of the year and still have more left over. To be fair, though, most of it was free and a lot of them were things she wore to events and didn't have any use for. He never thought he would see the day that Payson Keeler had dozens of formal dresses hanging in her closet.

He turned to the shoe wall to search out what he was sent for. Black studded pumps, she said. He didn't know what a pump was, but black and studded he got. There were a lot of black shoes (and a surprising number of bizarre colors and patterns) and there were a lot of studded shoes, so he looked for the ones where the two traits overlapped. There were four of them. The pump part was probably the key to the equations, but since he didn't know what that meant he used the process of elimination. He was almost certain it wasn't the boots, and she never wore flats with dresses, so that left two. One of them had two or three crisscrossing buckles which she couldn't bend down to fasten right now, so it had to be the slide on ones. He grabbed them and went back out to where Payson was just putting on her dress.

"Are these the right ones?" he asked, holding up the shoes.

She gave him a cursory look and said, "Yeah. Will you come zip me up?"

He did as she asked and then went to get ready himself, which took a lot less time than it did for her. When he came back she was putting on her jewelry. She owned almost as much jewelry as she did shoes, thanks to another sponsor. She had a lot of sponsors, some of who dropped her when the pregnancy came out, but Tiffany's and Louboutin were two of the biggest. Chanel was her real money maker, though. They paid her more than every other sponsor combined, and they didn't mind her being pregnant at all. In fact, she had a photo shoot scheduled with them in January because they wanted to do an ad campaign with pregnant pictures of her.

They left for the Rock as soon as she was finished. The girls all flew in early this morning and went to lunch together, but Payson was working and couldn't go. She wanted to keep the Rock as a place of work and not a social gathering, so the girls agreed not to come to the gym to see her. Tonight would be their reunion. It had only been three weeks since they were last together, but every time they acted like it had been a year.

Lauren and Emily made it a point to get together at least twice a month, but meeting in the middle between Los Angeles and Palo Alto was a lot easier than flying cross-country for either Payson or Kaylie.

He spotted them as soon as they entered the gym. Kaylie stood out like a lighthouse; it had been a long time since he saw someone wearing that much pink. Emily caught sight of them over Kaylie's shoulder and shouted, "Payson, Sasha! Over here."

They made their way to where the three girls were standing and all exchanged hugs. Lauren pulled away from Payson and said, "It's only been three weeks, but you look bigger."

"Of course I look bigger," Payson said with a laugh. "Babies grow. That's kind of the whole point of this pregnancy thing."

"Well, it's good to see motherhood hasn't changed you. You're still as sarcastic as ever."

It was, as expected, an evening of parents sucking up to the girls, girls flirting with Nicky and Austin, and Payson signing a million autographs. All and all it was a little tedious, but Ava entertained them with exaggerated flirting with Nicky, mocking all of the female gymnasts who tried to catch his attention every day. What really got Sasha were the girls who flirted with Austin even though he was having a baby with Payson, and as far as they knew still dating her.

In some ways, though, the event was much better than last year. Lauren wasn't being bitchy, Kim was hosting without the hindrance of a drunk Summer, and Payson wasn't crying in the stairwell.

It was good to see Lauren and Emily getting along so well. They still bickered constantly, but there was no malice behind it, and at some point he had changed the way he thought about them. A year ago they were the Kmetkos and the Tanners, but now he found himself grouping the family together as the Kmetko-Tanners. This happened around the same time that he started to consider himself, the Tuckers, the Keelers, and Nicky Russo all as one family. Kim had a talent for picking up strays.

Becca and her friend Avery paired together to make a video of all the Rock's Olympians, and they all stood in recognition of the Rock's mind blowing twenty one Olympic medals. Of course, Nicky's five really shouldn't be counted since he trained at Dallas leading up to the Games, and technically Austin's six could be attributed to Denver Elite since he wasn't at the Rock those last few weeks before London, but they were cheating and counting them all anyway.

The Rocky Award itself went to Emily, which surprised no one. It might have been a toss up between her and Payson, because they were both well loved by the younger girls, but there was an unspoken rule that you didn't vote for the Gymnast of the Year for the congeniality award. Her speech was moving, and when she came off the stage Steve Tanner was the first to give her a tearful hug, followed by the other members of their family. Sasha was glad to see Emily finally have the father that she always wanted.

Before they gave Payson her award they played the video that Lauren had made for the Coubertine medal ceremony, and Payson cried just as hard. When she went to the stage to accept her trophy she said, "Didn't we learn anything in Switzerland, guys? You're not supposed to make me cry before I have to speak." Some people laughed, and some just looked confused because they didn't get the joke. Payson continued, "I'm horrible at speeches and always have been. Words aren't my thing. So hopefully I can say this without messing it up too bad.

"People say that I'm the greatest gymnast the sport has ever seen. I'm flattered, but it's complete rubbish. There's nothing special about me that made me win at the Olympics. I won partly because I work hard, but mainly because I've had more help than anyone could possibly imagine. If I didn't have my parents, or Sasha, or my friends, I would never have been able to do this. There are people out there who face obstacles and fight through it and never give up. I'm not one of those people. I gave up three times, but my parents and Sasha fought for me. If I'm great it's because they were great first.

"A lot of you are here at the Rock because you want to go to the Olympics, or because you want your children to go to the Olympics. There is no secret to making that happen, but the hint that I can give you is to surround yourself with people who love you. It's still going to be hard, really hard, but it would be a million times harder alone. My friends held me up when I couldn't stand, literally, so I never would have been able to fly without them. Thanks, guys, and I love you all so much."

Kim was standing by the side of the stage since she was MCing, and she came forward to give her daughter a kiss and a hug, but when they separated Payson handed her mom the glass trophy and stayed at the podium. Sasha was one of the few who knew what was going on.

Payson turned back to the crowd and said, "I said earlier that I gave up three times trying to get to the Olympics, and the third time was actually at the Rocky Awards last year. I was finished. I didn't think I could do it and I wasn't sure if I even thought it was worth it anymore, but Sasha knew. He saw me hurting, saw me pulling away from the sport, so he did something to help me. He created an award in my honor. And even though I'm not thrilled about calling it the Payson Keeler Championship Cup, I am deeply touched by the sentiment and I wanted to be a part of choosing the recipient this year. Sasha and I sat down to talk about this a few months back and quickly realized that we didn't _have_ to talk about it, because we had the exact same person in mind.

"To me, a big part of being a champion is the ability to lose gracefully, and there are a lot of athletes who exhibit this quality, but the person receiving this award tonight goes above and beyond that. It's hard to lose, everyone in the room know that, but there is only one person here tonight who know what it feel like to be the best and not even be allowed to compete. Kaylie Cruz is one of the top three gymnasts in the world. If she competed in the All Around or Vault finals she would have been on the podium, but there is a rule in international gymnastics that says only two athletes from each country can advance to the finals. She missed out on both by hundredths of a point, but she accepted it with grace and dignity. She never resented Kelly and I for taking those two spots, and she was one of our biggest supporters during the rest of the competition.

"So, I am very pleased to present this year's Championship Cup to my friend and teammate, Kaylie Cruz. It's not the medal you deserve, but I hope it's a pretty close second."

While the rest of the room watched Payson, Sasha had watched Kaylie. When she realized that Payson was talking about her she covered her mouth with her hands in shock and started crying. She was every bit as surprised as Payson had been the year before, and her response was just as emotional. Payson never did manage a speech last year, and Kaylie's speech consisted of only one sentence. "This is so much better than a medal."

When Payson came back to their table, Austin bent down to whisper something in her ear. It wasn't really a whisper, though, because he had to speak loud enough for her to hear over the applause, and the people closest to them heard what he said. Nobody else needed to say anything to her, because Austin's words said it all. "You did good, Pay."

o-O-o

Holidays were always busy, but this was ridiculous. They had gone non-stop for the last two days, and the next day would be just as crazy. At least it was a good kind of crazy, the kind that Sasha liked to be a part of.

Jessica Torres turned twelve on Christmas Day, which put her under the wire for the 2016 Olympics with just 6 days to spare. Her mum told him once that she was glad Jess was born a few days early, because she was expected on January third and that would have put her at nineteen and a half for the 2020 Olympics, and winning at that age was hard. Payson, who turned eighteen during the games, was actually the youngest of their five, with Kelly being the oldest at eighteen and a half, but they were the exception, not the rule. Nastia won at nineteen, too, but the trend was not likely to continue. If Jess wanted to win at the Olympics, which she desperately did, she had a much better shot at fifteen than nineteen.

Since they couldn't very well have a party for Jess on Christmas, her family threw one on the twenty third. It in the annex at the Rock, and because Jess was young enough to still have school friends, it was large. All of the staff worked it, helping a bunch of eleven and twelve year olds do backhand springs or hang on the low bar. Her gymnastics friends had a blast playing in what were generally considered no-play zones—having fights in the foam pit and jumping on the trampoline, for example. Payson 'supervised' that part, because she wasn't allowed to spot any of the kids doing actual gymnastics. Spotting five year olds was one thing, but a twelve year old could do a lot more damage if they accidentally hit or fell on her.

Jess got to show off her skills while the other kids oohed and ahhed. Even her friends from the gym didn't know the full extent of what she could do, because most of her work was with Payson during the school day. When Jess did her Amanar, Zoe Reynolds said, "Holy shit!" and then promptly covered her mouth and tried to hide from her mum's sight.

It was a fun day, even if the kids spilled pizza, soda, and cake on the carpet and the parents nagged Payson for information about the pregnancy. It was great to see children enjoying gymnastics so much. Even the ones who loved it with their whole heart and soul like Payson did never had this kind of freedom in the gym. This was the kind of fun that only a kid could have.

The next day, Christmas Eve, was even crazier. They went to the Keelers' early in the morning to bake Christmas cookies and watch _White Christmas_ together, even though it was in fact a grey Christmas. The traditions were probably always rambunctious since Mark and Kim occasionally acted very much like the twelve year olds at Jess's party (they're kids at heart, Kim said) and Becca and Payson could be absolute brats if they wanted to, but when you added in Ava's cynical humor, Nicky's hilarious awkwardness, and Austin and Sasha's infamous mischievous streaks, the morning was total, wonderful chaos. Sasha had forgotten what this felt like. He was invited to Christmas at the Keeler home last year, but it was different when he was actually part of the family. He only had a handful of memories like this, when his family was together for a holiday.

That evening they had a family gathering of a different sort, one that involved more people than he could count of his fingers and toes. They grew since Thanksgiving, because Lauren brought both her boyfriend and his mum. They had separate Thanksgivings because Jake helped run a free Thanksgiving dinner at the gym he worked at, but Lauren wanted him there for Christmas. It was just Jake and his mum back in San Francisco, the easy solution was to bring them both to Boulder for the holiday. Krysta Williams fit as easily into the group as Jake did.

They Kmetko-Tanner house was cleared up well enough to allow the gathering to be held there—that is to say, there weren't boxes stacked all over the house. By now they were contained in just four or five rooms. The highlights of the party were a white elephant gift exchange, which got unruly when several of the parents battled over a box of _A Christmas Story_ bandaids, and a Skype call with the missing members of their family, Steven Legendre, Jake Dalton, Kevin Mazeika, and Kelly Parker who managed to Skype in from the Philippines where she was spending Christmas with her family.

He was alone with Payson now, but it was a short respite. Tomorrow morning they would be back at the Keelers' to unwrap presents and participate in what promised to be even crazier family traditions. They only had this night by themselves. He loved every bit of the time he spent with the Keelers, but it was good to be alone with Payson for a least a little while.

Payson was wearing Christmas pajamas when he went into her room, which he found to be hilarious. As if the garish red flannel and the reindeer covering it weren't enough, the top didn't button all the way down. Her belly got in the way, so it was buttoned at the top and left hanging open at the bottom. He had to fight not to laugh.

Payson looked up at him from her place on the bed. "You're not wearing anything Christmasy. That's just…" she wrinkled her nose in distaste, "_wrong_. It's Christmas Eve, Sasha. You're supposed to celebrate."

"I celebrate Boxing Day."

She rolled her eyes. "You would." Leave it to Payson to make a play on words without using any words. She was teasing him about his former (and sometimes current) pastime, and he knew what she meant without her saying it.

"If you're going to be cheeky," he said, "I'm not going to give you your present."

She was a sucker for presents. The last present he gave her still gleamed on her right hand. She rarely took the gold band off, to the point that she had a tan line from it on her finger. He hoped that she would like her Christmas gift as well as she liked her birthday gift.

He slipped a small box out of the pocket of his pajama pants and handed it to her, nervous as he watched her open it. Her eyes brightened when she saw the pale blue pendant nestled inside. "It's Alex's birthstone," he told her. "Or at least it's supposed to be. If he's born early I might have to change it."

"Oh, Sasha, this is wonderful! Thank you so much." She hugged him and then pulled back to take the necklace of the box. "Here, put this on me."

He clasped the necklace around the throat, a skill he picked up out of necessity when they started living together. She turned back toward him and asked, "How does it look."

It looked beautiful. The silver chain—white gold, the store clerk said, but it looked to same to him—and sparking stones stood out against her creamy skin, making her look like royalty. Princess Kate had nothing on Payson. But as soon as he looked below the level of her neck the illusion was shattered.

He burst out laughing while Payson looked at him like he was mental. "I'm not seeing what's so funny about a necklace here, Sasha."

"It's not the necklace. It's _that_," he waved at the jewelry, "paired with _that_," he said, pointing at her loud PJs. "Here I am thinking how you look like royalty and then I look down and your wearing bloody reindeer."

"Ah, you think I look like royalty," she cooed, completely ignoring the second part of his statement.

"Yeah, the bloody Queen of Hearts," he said, still laughing. She punched him in the shoulder and told him to shut up, but he didn't so she hugged him instead, which was much more effective at stopping his laughter.

"I love it, Sasha. It's perfect. This is the best Christmas I've ever had, and it hasn't even started yet."

She was right. It wouldn't be Christmas for an hour yet, but already it was the single best holiday of his life. The most exciting thing of all was that next year would be even better, because next year they would have Alex.

o-O-o

Going to red carpet events got old for Austin a long time ago, but he kept doing it for Payson, even though she hated it as much as he did. It was necessary for her. If she stopped going now people would say that she was hiding in embarrassment because of the pregnancy or some bullshit like that.

Last year the whole group of them rang in the New Year at a star-studded event on Time Square, but since all night partying wasn't exactly appropriate for a woman who was seven months pregnant, nor was it something that Payson even liked, they switched out the rich and famous for the rich and important. While Emily, Kelly, and Lauren partied together in LA and Kaylie hit the clubs in New York, Payson and Austin made small talk with some of the most influential people in the world. MJ had gone above and beyond the call of duty and scored them an invite to the White House's New Year's Eve party.

The Obamas were throwing a huge bash this year, and MJ tried unsuccessfully for a week and a half to get them invited. It was possibly the longest she'd ever gone without getting her way in the industry, but at last she used a string of connections to drop word to Michelle Obama that Payson Keeler and Austin Tucker might enjoy the more subdued event over the traditional party atmosphere of New Year's Eve. Since the First Lady remembered Payson from the Olympic reception, she personally invited them. It was MJ's greatest triumph to date.

It was freezing, but the red carpet outside the White House was lined with space heaters to make it bearable for the guests, especially the women in evening gowns, while they posed for pictures and gave interviews. Most of the reporters there were actual journalists and therefore minimally interested in Payson and Austin, which was great as far as Austin was concerned, but there were a few people there who would rather speak with them than a Senator. These were the celebrity followers who liked to pretend that they were legitimate news establishments—Extra, Entertainment Tonight, Access Hollywood, and People Magazine. People Magazine would not want to be grouped with the entertainment shows, but Austin called it like he saw it. He and Payson were standing next to Vincent Gray, the mayor Washington D.C., but the magazine wanted to talk to them instead.

The interviewer tried to ask questions about the baby but Payson wasn't biting, so she switched gears and concentrated on Payson's career and the honor of being invited to the White House. The woman was a little ingenious, though, because she was the first person to wrangle any kind of confirmation about the pregnancy out of Payson; possibly Payson was ingenious for waiting for the perfect question and opportunity to answer.

It happened as they were walking away from the interview to head farther down the carpet. The woman, in a ballsy move, called after them, "Payson, did the pregnancy cause your health problems?" It was the most direct question they'd ever been asked on the subject. Payson laughed and said, "I think it was more the other way around."

Austin was floored, not only by the fact that Payson answered the question, but by _how _she answered it. He had no idea what she meant, but he kept the surprise off his face and walked forward with her like everything was normal. She didn't explain anything until they were inside and had a moment of privacy. She whispered to him, "We got pregnant because we were scared and upset, and we weren't as careful as we should have been. That's the story."

They danced and mingled, and at midnight he kissed her, but his mind wasn't on the party. He cycled back and forth between wondering what the press would say the next morning and thinking about the last time they were at the White House. They spent that night making love, and that was never going to happen again. He missed her like crazy. The part that sucked most, though, was that she missed him just as much and it didn't change anything.

It had been months since the last time. After that first night in D.C. they only had sex when Payson's need got too much for her to handle, and when she learned to manage it they stopped. It was right to stop and neither of them tried to fight it, but that didn't make him miss her any less. He wasn't sure he would ever stop missing her that way. What they had now was enough, but it was human to always want more than enough.

Sleeping in the same bed still wasn't easy, but it was easier. When they got back to the hotel after the party Austin was able to help her out of her dress and not trail his fingers over her bare skin, and while lying down behind her still had an effect on his body, he held back the part of him that wanted to act on those desires. They were moving in the right direction, at least.

They laid for a while trying to sleep, and they should have been able to. They jumped ahead a couple of hours going from Colorado to D.C., but by now it was the middle of the night Mountain Time and the wee hours of the morning Eastern Time, so either way their bodies should have been ready to sleep. It was Austin's mind that was the problem, and he was sure it was the same for Payson.

After nearly an hour of frustrated wakefulness, Payson rolled over to face him. Or tried to roll over, at least. It wasn't an easy feat for a pregnant woman to do at thirty one weeks, so he helped her shift around until they were looking at each other.

"I hate this," she said.

"Me too."

"I don't understand," she said, finally broaching a subject that they had avoided until now. "What's wrong with us? Why don't we work?"

He spent a lot of time thinking about that, and he thought he had an answer, even if it wasn't one that made him feel any better. "You know how sometimes you can have a bad copy of a key, and it looks right, and it fits into the lock fine, but it doesn't work when you try to turn it? I think that's us. We're an almost perfect match."

"And almost perfect isn't enough? People get married all the time who are horrible for each other, but we can't be together because there's one tiny little notch in the key that's not right? It's not fair, Austin."

"It's not fair. I hate it and every day I want to say to hell with it and be with you. But those people who are horrible for each other, how often are they good parents? I don't want to be that way. I don't want to put myself before what's best for our baby."

"And us?" she asked.

"You'll find your perfect match, Payson. I promise." He couldn't make the same promise to himself, but he knew it was true for Payson. They all knew. They'd all known since the day Sasha Belov showed up in Hungary to coach the girls again, and Austin had accepted that now. Whatever that missing element was for Austin and Payson, that single notch that made the key not turn, it was there with Sasha. He wasn't sure if he would ever find anyone that fit him as well as Payson did, but he was okay with that as long as she was happy.

"I don't want anyone but you."

"You will, Pay," he said, and soon rather than later, he thought. "And when it happens I'll be happy for you. Don't ever hold back because of me."

She was quiet for a long time, either not having a response to what he said or just unwilling to accept it. He reached out to hold her hand, trying to give her the comfort with touch that he couldn't give with words, and eventually she said, "I liked the last time we were here better."

He laughed, because he thought the exact same thing earlier. "Me too. But look on the bright side. You got to confuse the hell out of a reporter today."

She giggled. This was the perfect side of their almost perfect. They could always make each other laugh.

Payson managed to go to sleep an hour or so later, but he never did. He didn't want to waste the time he had with her by sleeping.

When she woke up she checked the internet for news about herself, which was something she never, ever did, but she said she wanted to know what the fallout was from her statement last night. There was already an article up with the header "Payson Keeler admits pregnancy, blames it on health problems." Everything that followed was hilarious speculation about what she meant. The main theory was that the mystery treatment she was receiving for the eryptosis caused her birth control to fail. If those idiots knew anything about gymnastics at all they would know that Payson couldn't have been on the pill anyway. Any birth control an elite gymnast used would have to be non-hormonal, and he didn't think there was any kind of medication that could cause condoms to fail.

It took less than an hour for MJ to call. When Payson answered the phone, Austin could hear the agent's voice scream through the phone. "_What they bloody hell were you thinking_?"

"I was thinking," Payson said, "that a lot of people are saying the pregnancy made me sick and that we needed to nip that in the bud."

"Wait, you mean MJ didn't cook this up?" Austin asked. He assumed that the whole plan was concocted between the two women.

MJ must have heard him, because she said, "No, I bloody well didn't. What do you mean it was the other way around? How are you going to explain that?"

"It's easy. Everyone thinks I got sick before Nationals, right? So Austin and I were really upset, and scared that we weren't going to have much more time together, and we weren't careful. If you think you're going to die then safe sex isn't going to be your primary concern."

"I… That…" Since MJ couldn't come up with anything to criticize in the plan, she said, "You should have run this past me first."

"It was a spur of the moment kind of thing."

He could imagine the agent's face, half impressed with Payson's instincts and half put out that she didn't think of it first. "And how exactly do you plan to explain your reasons to the rest of the world? Did you even think about that?"

"Of course I did. You know how Chanel was wanting to partner up with Vogue to do a huge issue centered around the new ad campaign? If you could make that happen it would be the perfect time to go public with all this." It was frightening how good Payson was getting at this sort of stuff. She just out MJ-ed MJ Martin.

There was silence on the other end of the line and then a grudging, "I'll see what I can do. Try to keep your mouth in check until I talk to you again." She hung up the phone.

A slow grin spread over Payson's face. "I really love doing that."

"It worries me that you get so much pleasure out of messing with people," Austin said.

"Not all people. Just reporters and MJ."

"Well I'm sure there will be plenty of reporters for you to mess with today. After this story," he said, pointing to the computer, "they're probably waiting for us downstairs."

"So let's skip them. We'll order room service for breakfast and then have the concierge get a car out back to take us to the airport."

She was getting good at avoiding the paparazzi, and when MJ called them back a while later with a confirmation for the Vogue scheme she encouraged Payson to avoid them as much as possible. She wanted the world to wait until that issue came out to get any more information, and questions were inevitable if they were seen much in public. Any excuse to stay at home for a few weekends was great for Austin, so he was more than willing to comply.

They couldn't avoid the reporters waiting for them at the airport, but they were pros at ignoring them by now, so they walked along having a conversation about Austin's rings routine without even acknowledging the people surrounding them. He breathed a sigh of relief when they were on the plane and headed back home, back to people who knew the truth and didn't care. As far as the rest of the world was concerned, he would need Payson to coach him on the lies they were going to tell.

A/N: For some reason I had almost no inspiration for Christmas in this fic :( I even came back several times thinking that maybe there would be something that popped into my head later, but it never did, so I stuck with my short Sasha/Payson alone time Christmas.

There are a ton of things on my pinterest for this chapter: all of the girls' dresses for the Rockys, the necklace Sasha gives Payson, and Payson's dress for New Years Eve.

A few stats for this fic: Currently it is 284,453 words long, 1,523,433 characters long, and 578 pages with standard spacing and Times New Roman 12 point font. I have four more scenes that I plan to write and add in, so all those numbers will go up a bit. The estimated cost to print it (so far) is 46 U.S. dollars. It is too big to have spiral bound.


	79. Chapter 79

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

A/N: FINALLY! *sigh of relief*

* * *

><p>Payson wasn't in the bed when Sasha woke up, but that wasn't unusual. She would be downstairs making breakfast like she was on so many other mornings. They were both early risers but Payson usually beat him by ten or fifteen minutes, at least when she was healthy. She was starting to drag a little bit the last few weeks when her blood levels started to drop, but it was nothing like it was back at the Village. It hadn't been that bad in a long time because her medicine was working well. She was now able to replenish her blood cells at almost the same rate that she was losing them, so it took several weeks for her to drop enough to have symptoms, and a transfusion was enough to resolve the problem.<p>

She had one this past Monday and Dr. Owen was hopeful that it would be the last. She went nearly two months before she needed it, and her cell production was increasing at a steady rate. She shouldn't drop below normal levels again. Five months ago it seemed impossible, but Payson was almost completely well now. She would need to be monitored for the rest of her life, and Alex would have to be tested for the same abnormality, but the doctors said that problems could be prevented if they knew about the condition.

He went downstairs to look for her and was unsurprised to find her standing in front of the stove. It was one of his favorite sights for so many reasons. He got to eat good food, that was one reason, and cooking made her happy, that was another, but the biggest reason he loved to see her in the kitchen was because it meant that she was well enough to do it. These past couple of weeks, when her levels were low, she didn't cook as much.

"Morning," he said. He stood behind her and wrapped his arms around her hips, beneath her belly, his normal greeting when she was cooking breakfast. He took a moment to inhale the scent of her shampoo, another morning ritual of his.

"Good morning." She tilted her head up to place a kiss on his jaw, which was her own morning ritual, but today something was… different. He couldn't pinpoint what it was, but he saw in the way Payson's eyes widened that she felt it, too. He brushed it aside and leaned down to press his lips to hers like normal, and that was… even more different.

A peck on the lips, that's all those kisses ever were. There was no lingering, no closing their eyes, no leaning closer, but today that changed. Payson's eyes fluttered shut first and then so did his, and the press of her lips against his was just a tiny bit firmer than usual. It lasted perhaps a half a second longer, no more, but for two people who had kissed the exact same way hundreds of times, a half second might as well have been years.

He pulled back and saw his own shock reflected in Payson's eyes. He didn't understand what happened, but somehow something had changed. He released her and put space between them in an attempt to undo whatever he just did.

He was confused and so was she. She was looking at him with a curious expression on her face, like she was trying to figure out what was going on, until she realized that she had food cooking in front of her and whipped back around just in time to keep the pancakes from burning. They both used the distraction as a chance to back out of the situation.

He set about gathering plates and silverware for them and making tea in an attempt to move on. It was one of their slip ups, he decided, when their attraction bubbled to the surface just long enough to remind them that it was there. It happened all the time. Except that this didn't feel like attraction. It felt like something… different.

Breakfast was awkward. Breakfast was never awkward. They could move past anything. Hell, he accidentally saw her masturbating and it didn't cause the discomfort that a single kiss was causing now.

He couldn't pinpoint what the change was, but it was lasting longer than just the kiss. When he took her plate to rinse off in the kitchen, their hands brushed for just a second and there was an electric spark, and every time their eyes met he couldn't pull his away. He wanted to be near her but at the same time wanted to keep his distance, because whatever was happening scared him a bit, and it intensified when they touched.

When they left the house Payson said, "I think I'll take my car today. I have a late class and then I'm supposed to spend a little time with Austin. It's silly for you to hang around that long just to wait for me."

It was an excuse. They always drove to work together and it had never been a problem. If one of them needed to stay late they either got a ride or called each other to be picked up. It wasn't unusual for her and Austin to hang out after practice, and Austin always brought her home. She just didn't want to spend the time in the car with him.

He didn't press the issue. He didn't want to pressure her into anything, and the few minutes apart might give him time to figure what the hell just happened and how he could fix it. Payson was his world. If she pulled away now it might kill him, so whatever he just did, he had to fix it.

o-O-o

Something was going on. Kim was the first one to the gym that morning, which was unusual in and of itself, but when Sasha showed up he was alone.

"Where's Payson?" she asked. She was concerned at her daughter's absence, but if Payson was sick Sasha wouldn't have come at all, so there had to be another reason.

He looked guilty, but for what she didn't know. "She'll be here in a minute or so. I think she got caught at a couple of red lights."

The last time they came to work in separate cars was months ago, back when Payson still needed to sleep late. Kim didn't know why they would change their routine now.

When Payson came in a few minutes later she was her normal self, but Sasha was being a little weird. He was careful to not to touch Payson, which stood out since she couldn't remember a time in several months when they were in close proximity and not touching. Well, other than that short period when Payson wasn't touching Sasha or Austin for reasons that Kim tried not to dwell on.

Sasha shifted on his feet and said, "I'm, uh, going to go check the equipment before the gymnasts get here."

Checking the equipment was routine, making sure that there was no wear and tear on anything that would make it unsafe to use, but he usually did that on Fridays because it was the least busy day of the week. There were a lot of two-a-day gymnasts training on Thursday mornings and the gym would be full. If he was checking the equipment on a Thursday then it was an excuse to get out of the office.

He left, but because the office was so small and Payson was rather large at the moment, it was impossible for him to get out without brushing against her. There was a slight pause, a brief moment of eye contact between them, and then Payson _blushed_.

Something was definitely going on.

She waited until Sasha was gone and Payson was sitting at the desk that the two coached shared, then she slid the door shut and asked, "Payson, what happened with Sasha?"

Payson's head jerked up. "What do you mean?"

"He's trying not to touch you and you just blushed when he did. Obviously something has happened. What was it, sweetie?"

Payson looked away, down toward the gym floor where Sasha was, and whispered, "I don't know."

"Was it…" Kim struggled with how to say this. "You're a young woman, and Sasha is a very attractive man…"

The reaction was completely unexpected. Payson scoffed. "Please, mom, we've been dealing with the attraction for months. If we were going to break it would have happened a long time ago."

"What?" Kim stuttered. "I… I mean, you… but Sasha? … How long…"

"I happen to be a very attractive woman, too, mom. It's just as normal for Sasha to be attracted to me as it is for me to be attracted to him."

She thought back to all those times that she told Mark he was crazy for thinking that there was something between Payson and Sasha, that they didn't think about each other that way, but apparently they _did_. She had worried for a while that Payson's crush was still alive, but she showed no signs of it, and at one point, when first Sasha came back from Romania, Kim was concerned that he might have feelings for her daughter, but she dismissed it as an overactive imagination. It never occurred to her that Sasha might think about Payson in _that_ way.

"How long has this been going on?" she strangled out.

Payson was definitely uncomfortable with the subject, but she answered anyway. "It depends on what you mean. For me, the day he walked into the gym. The crush came later, but the desire was always there. For Sasha, I don't know. I never asked, but I know it's been a long time. If I had to guess it was around the time I first came back to gymnastics, when my body changed a little bit. But if you want to know how long we've known it was mutual, it's been since London."

"And you've been dealing with this the whole time you've been living together?"

"Yeah. We've had a few awkward moments, but it hasn't been a problem. We're stronger than that."

It was beyond Kim's comprehension, but Payson and Sasha had always been beyond her comprehension, so this was nothing new. "Then what happened this morning?"

Payson turned back to the window to watch Sasha check the tension in the uneven bar cables. "I meant what I said, mom. I don't know."

"Try to explain. Maybe I can help." She'd actually been more help to Payson these past few months than ever before, because pregnancy and babies were something that she knew about. So many of Payson's other problems were things that Kim had never faced. She wasn't sure if she could help with anything involving Payson and Sasha because they were so inexplicable, but she could try.

"Nothing really happened, that's what makes it so confusing. I was cooking breakfast when he came downstairs, and he wrapped his arms around me from behind like he does every morning, and I reached up and kissed him like I do every morning, but something was just… different. And everything has been different since. It was different when he kissed me back, and it's different every time we touch. Something's changed and I don't understand what."

A thought creeped into Kim's mind, and she wasn't sure how she felt about it. "Payson… Do you think that you might have feelings for Sasha?"

Payson snapped her head back around. "I love Austin," she said, like she was offended that Kim would suggest anything else.

"I know you do, sweetie, but you and Austin aren't together anymore. It's okay for you to have feelings for someone else."

"I don't want anyone else." Payson heaved herself out of her chair and left, and if couldn't have been clearer that she was angry. Kim screwed that up royally.

Sasha was in a few minutes later to ask, "What did you do to piss off Payson like that? The last time I saw her that angry was when Nathan tried to do a double front without a spot."

Kim shuddered. She remembered when that happened. The whole gym remembered when that happened. One of the boys who wanted to go elite tried to do a dismount off the rings that he wasn't ready for and almost killed himself, and Payson had been furious. The frightening experience and two week suspension that Payson gave Nathan were probably enough of a deterrent to keep him from ever doing something that stupid again, but if it wasn't, Payson's anger would have been. In eighteen years Kim had never once seen Payson that mad, and nobody was likely to forget it anytime soon. They were all used to Sasha yelling, but the sight of their mild mannered, encouraging coach that angry would keep the rest of the gym in check for years. It might even reach legend standards. If Payson was really that angry now, Kim would have to stay out of her way for a while.

She wanted to explain to Sasha what happened, but she didn't know how. Instead she asked, "Sasha… do you have feelings for Payson?"

His face turned to stone and he said, "No." Then he walked out of the room without another word.

She screwed that up, too, but at least she had an answer. She wasn't sure how Payson felt, but Sasha was definitely in love. She hoped this wasn't going to ruin things for them.

She saw Payson stalking across the gym floor below her and Sasha farther away checking over the vaulting table, and they were both as angry as she'd ever seen them. The gymnasts were in for a rough day today, and all and all Kim thought she better leave. She'd get Henrietta Dashelet to cover for her and go home until they cooled off.

o-O-o

Austin got to the gym a little on the late side, which he frequently did. If he needed one on one he came in before the others, but if he was just looking for plain old practice time he slept in. He could stay late to make up for it, which he did most days anyway. Payson taught evening class a lot of times, so he stuck around to be near her.

When he stepped through the doors he felt it. There was a disturbance in the force of the Rock. There was something different than normal, like there was fear in the air, and it didn't take long to figure out why. Sasha was in one of his moods, which always made practice harder, but the frightening thing was that Payson was seething. An angry Payson was a much, much worse thing than an angry Sasha.

He made his way over to her, one of only two people in the gym who could do that with impunity when she was mad. The other person was Sasha, but that didn't seem likely to happen anytime soon.

He stood beside her by the vault run. He might be allowed to approach her, but that didn't guarantee that he was allowed to touch her, so he played it on the safe side.

"Did you and Sasha have a fight or something?" he asked. It was the only explanation he could think of for them both to be mad.

"No. I had a fight with my mom, and then apparently Sasha had a fight with her, too. I don't know what his was about."

"And what was yours about?"

She shut him out. "I don't want to talk about it."

He held up his hands and stepped away, clear signs that he was yielding to her dominance. Don't upset the lady with a grenade in her hand.

Her face softened a little when she saw what he was doing. "I'm sorry, babe. We'll talk about it later, after practice."

He didn't say anything else. He stayed where he was and waited for whatever she needed, and it didn't take too long for her to let him know. Her shoulders started to loosen and her hands unclenched, and within a few minutes she stepped into his side for a hug. She looped her arms around his waist and rested her head on his chest while he wrapped his arms around her shoulders. She told him once that his arms made her feel safe, and he hoped that it helped today.

She reached up and kissed him, which wasn't unusual for them, and said "I love you," which also wasn't unusual, but he knew that she was upset. She was trying to validate what they had.

"I love you, too, Pay. I always will. Nothing is going to change that."

"Nothing?"

"Nothing. There's not a thing in this world that you could do to make me stop loving you."

It was what she needed to hear, for whatever reason, and he held her long enough for her to calm the rest of the way down. When he knew she would be okay alone he released her and said, "I'm going to go tackle Sasha now, so if he tries to rip my heart out of my chest, I would appreciate it if you stepped in to save me."

She laughed and wiped away a tear that he didn't realize had formed. "I'm not sure that's a good idea, but it's your funeral if I can't save you in time."

Sasha was by the beam terrifying a group of college-bound elites. Austin walked up to him and slapped him on the back. "Wanna talk about it?"

"No."

"That's what I thought. I just wanted to point out that you're scaring the shit out of these girls, so you should probably either calm down or let Payson take over while you work in the office."

Sasha whipped his head around to look at Payson, who was still at the vault run working with Jess and Becca. She was fine now, all of her anger having drained out while Austin hugged her, but Sasha missed that development. He was lost in his own anger.

His eyes lost some of their steely glint when he saw her calm again. Whatever was eating at him was obviously related to whatever made Payson so furious. She said they both had a fight with her mom, so the fight might have been about the same thing.

"I'll be fine," Sasha said, the male way of promising to calm down. "She's got her own gymnasts to take care of. She doesn't need mine, too."

"Dude, she's got two."

"Dude, she's got nine," Sasha said, mocking Austin's expression. "She's in the middle of her rounds right now. Four of her level tens are here for morning practice and she's taking over the junior elites full time now."

Austin frowned. "She's taking over the junior elites? Why didn't I know about this?" Payson normally told him everything.

"It's been gradual. She's been doing more and more with them lately and we decided last night for her to take them permanently. That was always the plan, but she's doing so well that it happened faster than we expected."

"Wow. Go Payson." He was so proud of her. She was born to be a coach. She was doing it before she retired, anyway, working with the younger girls when they asked for help or when she had spare time. It was no surprise that she rocked at it now.

Sasha stared at her back while she talked Becca through her newly upgraded Yurchenko one and a half. "Yeah, she's pretty amazing," he said. There was something off about how he said it, something sad or… longing, maybe?

For a brief second Austin thought that Sasha might be figuring out his feelings for Payson, but then something happened that worried him. Payson turned around like she could feel Sasha's eyes on her back, which she probably could, but she didn't smile like normal. She stiffened and drew up her shoulders in a protective gesture until Sasha looked away. Sasha's face was painted with guilt and self-loathing.

"What the hell was that?" Austin said before he could stop himself. He trusted Sasha with his life, and more importantly with Payson's life, but his instinct was to protect Payson from any threat, and she just reacted to Sasha's gaze like it was a threat.

"Nothing," Sasha snapped. "I don't know what you're talking about."

When the surge of adrenaline passed Austin reminded himself that Sasha loved Payson and that he would never, ever do anything to hurt her. There was something going on here, something wrong to make Payson treat Sasha like a threat when the whole world knew that he would die before hurting her.

Austin played interference for Payson the rest of the day. He didn't believe that there was a real need for her to avoid Sasha, but if that was what she wanted he would make it as easy as possible for her. The two coaches never interacted face to face throughout practice, and all of their nonverbal communication played out much the way it did that morning. She threw up walls and Sasha castigated himself for whatever he thought he did. Sasha left early, which he did sometimes on the nights that Austin had plans her, but after they day they had it seemed purposeful.

Sometimes Austin and Payson went out, but tonight they just locked up the gym and laid in the middle of the floor together. He kept the conversation light, giving her time break down all the barriers she built up during practice.

"Do you miss it?" he asked, indicating the gym. He couldn't imagine what it was like to go from doing gymnastics all day every day to not doing it at all.

"I do. I do a lot, but Alex is worth it. Doing gymnastics right now wouldn't make me nearly as happy as he does."

"You're going to keep doing it, aren't you, after he's born?" He couldn't imagine Payson not working beside him in the gym.

"Definitely. As soon as I can I'll be back up on the bars. I don't know how Kaylie can give it up so easily."

Other than Emily and Kaylie, the rest of the girls were like Payson. They loved it too much not to keep doing it, so they were in the gym a couple times a week just for fun. Beth was even thinking about going another year before she retired. She was a year younger than the rest of them, so she still had time. Emily, of course, was doing it every day since she was competing in NCAA, but Kaylie just stopped. She didn't even join a gym in New York. "I think it's different for her because her dad put so much pressure on her. She wanted to do it, but it was kind of a cage for her, too."

"I'm not ever going to do that," Payson said. "If Alex wants to do gymnastics then he can, but if he doesn't love it the way we do I would never force him. I'm not going to live vicariously through my son."

"We'll be parents like your mom and dad," he promised her. "That'll be my goal. Be like Mark."

Payson laughed, but then an uncomfortable silence fell over them. They'd been avoiding the topic they needed to discuss.

"What happened this morning, Pay?"

She sat up and he did too so that they could face each other. Payson was staring down at her lap so he lifted her chin and asked again, "What happened? You can tell me anything."

"Something's changed with me and Sasha and I don't know why."

Austin wasn't sure what to make of her words. He could tell that something had changed, but she made it sound so dire, and she was acting like he had forced himself on her or something, which Sasha would never do. He decided to come at it from a different angle. "How does this connect to the fight with your mom?"

She looked away and said, "She thinks I have feelings for him."

"And do you?" He knew the answer, but he wasn't sure if she did.

She was angry again when she looked at him. "I love _you_, Austin. I don't want anyone else."

Things started to click together. Payson wasn't ready to accept the truth. She was angry with her mom for suggesting it and she was treating Sasha like a threat because he _was_ one right now. He was a threat to the way things were, because no matter how much she wanted to stop it, things were going to change. Austin never thought he'd be the one to make Payson understand her feelings for Sasha. "I know you love me, Pay, but you love him too. There's nothing wrong with that."

"How can you say that?" she asked. "How can you just give us up? I'm not ready for that."

Everything turned out so backward for them. He always thought that he would be the one trying to hold on to what they had when it was over, but it was Payson who couldn't let go. "I'm not giving us up, Pay. I'm accepting what I've always known was going to happen. It's taken me a long time to get to this place, and it wasn't easy, but I understand. I love you, but I can't love you the way he does."

"Yes you can," she cried.

"I can't." It killed him, but she had to understand. He couldn't let her be in pain like this. "It's not that he loves you more. That's impossible; nobody could ever love you more than I do. He just loves you different. You and I aren't made that way. We're made for this, for what we're doing right now."

"How do you know that?"

He tugged on her hand until she was cuddled into his chest and looking up at him, then he reached down to brush the tears off her cheek. "I know you feel it, Payson. You felt it when it was over with us, and you feel it that what we have now is right for us. And you feel it with Sasha."

Tears fell down her cheeks as she nodded. "I don't _want_ to feel it, but I can't make it stop and I feel like I'm betraying you."

"You are not betraying me. That's why I kept telling you not to hold back because of me. I knew you would end up with Sasha and I didn't want you to feel like that was wrong. We can't stand still forever. We have to move forward, and Sasha is your forward."

"I don't know how to do this," she admitted. "I don't know how to love him and love you too."

"I don't either, but we'll figure it out as we go. This is not going to break us, Pay. We're too strong to break."

o-O-o

Sasha would never, ever admit this to anyone, but he was watching Stick It. He wanted to get drunk, to forget how badly he screwed everything up, but that would just upset Payson more. So instead of trying to drink away his thoughts about her, he was doing the opposite. He was doing everything possible make himself think about her. Sitting in her favorite spot on the couch, watching her favorite movie, staring at a picture of them together that was sitting on the side table, wearing one of his shirts that she slept in sometimes. The opposite.

Kim's question kept repeating itself in his head, evolving over time. _Do you have feelings for Payson? Does he have feelings for Payson? Do I have feelings for Payson?_

He was such an idiot. Payson was the best thing that had ever happened to him, and he had to go screw it up by having feelings for her. How long had he felt this way? Whatever happened this morning wasn't the beginning, it was the culmination. Something that refused to stay under the surface any longer.

Payson knew. He wasn't sure if Kim mentioned her suspicions or if Payson figured it out for herself, but she knew and she obviously hated him for it. She barely looked at him all day, and the few times she did meet his eyes she turned to ice. She made it clear that she wanted him nowhere near her.

When he heard Payson's car pull into the driveway, Sasha switched off the movie and turned on a football match. She already hated him for what he was feeling. It would only make things worse if she realized that he was sitting in here obsessing over her.

He sneaked a glance at her when she sat down by him, but he didn't look to long. He didn't want to see her stiffen again the way she had all day. All he had time to notice was that her eyes were rimmed with red. She'd been crying.

"We have to talk about this," she said, not bothering with a hello.

He stared at the tele and pretended not to understand, as if ignoring it now could make things better. "Talk about what?"

"What happened this morning."

"Nothing happened, Pay." His lie was weak. Something did happen, but he still didn't understand what. He didn't know how he managed to ruin everything in just a few seconds.

Payson changed subjects so fast that it made his head spin. "What did my mom say to you?"

"She…" She knew already, didn't she? Kim must have told Payson her suspicions, and that was what she was so angry about when she came out of the office. She was angry at him for crossing that final boundary, for ruining everything. He didn't know why she wanted to hear it from him, but he couldn't lie to her, no matter how much he wanted to. "She asked me if I had feelings for you."

"What did you tell her?"

"No."

"Were you telling the truth?" It was whispered, barely loud enough for him to hear.

He finally allowed himself to look at her. He met her eyes and she didn't close off like she had all day. She didn't accuse him. She didn't even look angry anymore, but it was possible that he was about to undo all of that with his answer. "No. I wasn't telling her the truth."

He expected to see disgust or betrayal on her face, for her to tell him that he'd ruined it all, to say that she never wanted to see him again. He expected a lot of things, but he didn't expect what happened. He didn't expect for her to kiss him.

It was nothing like the kisses they shared so many times a day. It was a real kiss, which was something they'd only experienced twice before, and this wasn't like either of those. The first time they kissed she was proving a point, and the second time she kissed him as an outlet for her fear and doubts. This kiss was a question and an answer rolled into one. _Question:_ _Was there something more between them? Answer: There was._

He pushed her away. "Payson, stop. We can't do this."

"Why not?" she asked. "Tell me, Sasha. Why can't we do this?"

_Because he'd ruin everything._ "There's too much at stake. We can't take that chance."

"You're afraid we'll mess things up between us."

It wasn't a question, but he answered anyway. "No. I'm afraid that _I'll_ mess things up. I already have."

"How?" Her eyebrows knit together in confusion, like she really didn't know.

"Payson, you've barely looked at me all day, and the few times you did you closed off like I was going to hurt you. I can't be the person who makes you feel that way. I won't do it."

She took his hand, the first normal touch they'd had all day. "Sasha, that wasn't you. It was me. I was confused and scared. I didn't understand what I was feeling for you and I felt like I was betraying Austin by feeling anything at all."

"Aren't you?" He winced at how accusatory that sounded, but it was an honest question. Austin was the father of her son and he couldn't ever be cut out of the picture. Sasha wouldn't come between them.

"If he wasn't okay with this I wouldn't be here." The answer was firm, not conciliatory. The fact that Austin was okay with this was secondary. The true message came through loud and clear—Austin was going to be involved in every major decision in her life, and that wasn't ever going to change. Sasha would have to accept that. "I love Austin, and I'm never going to stop loving him. But we're not together anymore and we're not ever going to be. I was hanging onto what we had because I was scared. I was scared of losing him and I was scared of taking a risk with you."

"So what's changed?" he asked. "If you're so scared, then why are you willing to take that risk now?"

"Because I can't fight it now that I know it's there. We can't go back. But I think the fact that we are so afraid of losing this means that it's worth the risk. If this is so good now, then think about how good it could be if there was more."

He opened his mouth to respond, not even sure what he was going to say, but he never got to find out, because Payson trapped his lips with hers again and pulled him into one of the most soul wrenching kisses of his life. When she pulled away she left only millimeters of space between their lips, just enough space to speak. "I love you, Sasha Belov. Do you love me?"

Three words, that was all it took. Three words to change his life forever.

Suddenly he realized how long he'd been waiting to hear her say that, and how long he'd felt the same way. It went back longer than he ever knew, long before the attraction started, back even to his early days at the Rock. He remembered all those times that he thought _if she was older_. If she was older she'd be the kind of woman that he was interested in. If she was older he could spend as much time as he wanted to discover all the layers of her personality. If she was older he could see himself being married to her. If she was older they would be great parents together. It was all hypothetical, based on something that would never happen, so it never occurred to him that he might be falling in love with her even then.

He remembered the times that he flirted with her during practice and how he was convinced that it was the result of his attraction, and how guilty he felt for letting her believe it was in her head. He remembered how much he missed her while he was in Romania, how he thought about her ten times as much as he thought about any of the other girls, and how he never thought about Summer at all. He remembered that she was the one who convinced him to come back to the Rock, and that she was the only one he went to see that night he arrived in Hungary. He remembered how he avoided her when he got back and how much it hurt to do it. He remembered that he let himself get closer than he should have after Worlds, and realized how inappropriate it was for her to become his best friend when she was a seventeen year old girl. He was so blind. He didn't have _feelings_ for her. He loved her. He had loved her all along.

She was still hovering in front of his lips, and she said, "You're making me nervous here, Sasha. You're supposed to answer the question."

He didn't know how long he made her wait while he was lost in memories, but he didn't make her wait any longer. He pressed his lips to hers before he pulled back and said, "Yes. Oh God yes, I love you. I've always loved you."

o-O-o

Kim was wary when she walked into the Rock on Friday. If Payson and Sasha were still angry with her it could be a very uncomfortable day.

What she saw was unexpected. Payson was with Austin, standing between his legs while he sat up on the pommel horse, with her arms looped around his neck and a big smile on her face. Kim wasn't sure what she was expected to find if her daughter was no longer mad, but it wasn't that. She was so sure yesterday that Payson and Sasha had feelings for each other, but now it looked like Payson might be back with Austin. But if Sasha was in love with Payson and Payson was in love with Austin, this would get messy.

She was surprised again when she walked into the office to find a perfectly happy Sasha going through paperwork. If Kim was right at all about Sasha's feeling for Payson, him being happy and Payson being with Austin should be mutually exclusive.

"Good morning," she said, looking for any sort or reaction. The only one she got was a returned good morning and a smile.

Kim was confused. It just got worse, too, because when Payson came into the office she and Sasha acted completely normal. They touched just like they always had, teased like usual, kissed with no hesitation. It was like the day before never happened.

She wanted to ask, but she was trying to respect Payson's privacy. Payson would come to her when she was ready. If Kim was really honest with herself, though, she was also afraid of a repeat of yesterday. Making Payson mad two days in a row seemed like a bad idea.

Kim went for half the day this way, not knowing what was going on with her daughter, and she didn't get an answer until the end of lunch. Even then it was an answer of action, not words.

Lunch was crowded because Austin joined them, as he did most days, and the office really wasn't designed to hold four people doing normal activities. The gym moms crowding in for a meeting was one thing, because they weren't moving and many people were standing, but eating lunch was a different story. It involved a lot of movement, and space was required to put the food, so the people ended up very close together.

Payson, by virtue of being pregnant, was given a spot on the couch, with Sasha next to her and Austin and Kim sitting in chairs across the coffee table from them. Payson and Sasha were close together so that they could both put their food on the table in front of them, but it was standard behavior for them anyway. They always sat close enough to touch. Lunch was normal, which was odd considering what the day before had been like, and nothing unusual happened until Kim was gathering up the trash. Sasha whispered something in Payson's ear—normal; Payson laughed and leaned into him—normal; they kissed—normal; but if you happened to look at the exact right moment, which Kim did, you could see something that was very much not normal. For the briefest second Payson slipped her tongue into Sasha's mouth.

Kim's jaw dropped. Her first reaction to look to Austin for his, but he didn't have one. He either didn't see or was completely unfazed. She was more confused than ever, but what could she say? Excuse me, Payson, but why did you just stick your tongue in your coach's mouth? Which one of these two men are you actually dating? If she wanted to get Payson angry again, those questions would be the perfect way.

A day ago she wouldn't have doubted that Payson and Austin were broken up, but she wasn't so sure today. She knew that they slept together on occasion, and she wasn't certain that had ever stopped, and yesterday Payson had been so insistent that she loved Austin. She was as mad as Kim had ever seen her at the mere suggestion that she might have feelings for someone else. Then today, the way they were standing when Kim walked in that morning, it gave every impression of them being a couple.

It made sense for her to be back with Austin considering how much they loved one another. They had been forged with fire. If they could move past their horrible beginning, they could move past anything, and this morning Kim believed that they had. If she was honest with herself, she wanted them to get back together. She'd wanted it for months. Payson should be with the father of her baby, and even though she'd been so sure yesterday that something was going on between Payson and Sasha, she never gave up hope for Payson and Austin. It wasn't that she had anything against Sasha, because she didn't, or that she didn't want him to be with Payson if they really loved each other. Kim just wanted Payson and Austin to be together more.

She kept watch the rest of the day, looking for anything else unusual, but she didn't find anything. All three of them acted like they did every day. It was the end of the day before Kim had confirmation for any of the options. Sasha and Payson were standing close together having a whispered conversation, which they did fairly often, but Kim was near enough to hear it.

"Do you want to order dinner in tonight?" Sasha asked.

Payson shook her head. "Um um. I want to skip dinner and go straight to bed."

Sasha chuckled and said, "I think we'll need energy for that, love. We should eat something first."

They were talking about sex. They had to be, there was no other explanation for their words, but how had they gone from denying any feelings at all to sleeping together in the same day? Kim knew that she and Payson had slightly different views on sex, but this was pushing it even for Payson. Sleeping with a new man in a matter of hours, especially when she was seven months pregnant with another man's baby, was… was… Kim couldn't even think of a non-offensive word to describe the situation.

The other two were getting ready to leave, but she couldn't let her daughter go without speaking with her. "Payson," she said, "can I talk to you alone for a few minutes?"

Payson was wary. She must know what Kim wanted to talk about. She sat down but waited for Kim to start the conversation.

"I've tried not to pry, Payson. I've tried to accept that you're an adult and you can make your own decisions," Kim said, "but I've gone all day without asking any questions, and I don't think I can do that anymore. What you just said with Sasha… are you sleeping together?"

"Yes." That was all she said.

"Okay, I'm going to need more of an explanation here. Yesterday you both insisted that you didn't have feelings for each other, so how did you get to this point?"

"Mom… I was confused yesterday. I know you want to understand, but you can't. You can't even begin to imagine how hard it is to love two men."

She loved two men. Disturbing thoughts were forming in Kim's head and she needed to nip those in the bud. "So what about Austin?"

"Nothing's changed. I talked to him about it last night and told him everything, how I felt about Sasha and how I felt guilty because I didn't want to betray him, and he, I don't know, gave me his blessing. He said he knew I loved Sasha before I knew it."

"But weren't you and Austin…"

Payson sent her a scathing look. "I did not just hop out of Austin's bed and into Sasha's, although technically Sasha's in my bed. Austin and I haven't had sex in months. If you want to get really specific, we haven't had sex since October 29th."

"Payson, you're my daughter. I never, _ever_ want to get specific. I'm not asking these questions because I'm curious. I'm asking them because I'm concerned."

"Mom, I know I've given you a lot of reasons to be concerned these last several months, but me being with Sasha, that's not one of them. You've seen for yourself how good we are together. It's not like we just suddenly fell in love with each other. We realized it suddenly, yes, but the feelings have been there for a long time."

Again, Kim remembered the time after Sasha came back from Romania. It occurred to her then that Sasha might have feelings for Payson, but she wouldn't let herself believe it. Was he in love with her even then? "How long," she asked. "How long have you been in love?"

"Looking back," Payson said, "I think almost as long as we've known each other. Sasha thinks for him it was just two or three days after he came here, even though he didn't realize it at the time. For me it was a little longer, because I was so young. Not much longer, though. Before Nationals for sure."

Kim was stuck on 'just two or three days.' It was wrong for a thirty one year old man to fall in love with a sixteen year old girl. Wasn't it? But was it wrong for a thirty two year old to love an eighteen year old girl? Or a forty year old to love a twenty six year old? At what age did it become okay?

"Payson, I don't know what to say here. I don't know how to feel about this."

"Feel happy for me." Payson stood up to kiss Kim on the cheek before she left. "Be happy, mom. I know I am."

o-O-o

Sex with a new person was always a little awkward, trying to figure out each other's likes and dislikes, learning the best ways to touch one another, but that was counteracted by how well Sasha and Payson knew each other, which was in turn counteracted by the fact that she was seven months pregnant. He'd never had sex with a pregnant woman before, and they didn't have the advantage of a slow transition over the course of several months, so it was a game of experimentation, but when they figured out the best position for them it was every bit as amazing as he always thought sex with Payson would be.

When they made love the next morning it was just as amazing but less awkward, and now, spending the scant time they had together in bed, there was no awkwardness at all. Only pleasure, as much pleasure as they could get before she flew to New York the next morning.

Things were so easy with them. He had been so stupid to fight it, and so stupid not see it in the first place. Payson was right. He always thought that nothing could trump what they had together before, but this did. This was the best thing that had ever happened to him.

Payson was curled up by his side and tracing patterns on his bare chest. It wasn't much different than what they did all the time, except that this time they were naked and she was filled with his seed. He understood now why Austin said that the pregnancy was a turn on; Sasha would love to see her carrying his child one day, living proof that he had possessed her.

She placed a line of kisses across his collar bone. "I needed this so bad," she said. "You have no idea how hard it is to want sex all the time and never have it."

"You might be surprised. I think I've wanked more in the six months I've been living with you than I have since I was twelve."

She pushed up on her arms so that she was looking down at him. "You were _twelve_?"

"Yes." He was confused by her surprise. "Why? How old were you?"

"I've told you this already. I was sixteen and it was the day you walked into the Rock the first time." Now that she mentioned it she did say that she didn't start masturbating until she met him, but he hadn't put two and two together.

A grin spread across his face. "The first day, huh? And I only spent, what, half an hour with you lot?"

"Don't be smug," she admonished.

"Oh no, I'm going to be smug. I made you start masturbating with half an hour of knowing you. That might be my greatest accomplishment ever." He couldn't help but tease her. "Were you good at it?"

Her mouth twitched into a cocky smirk. "Kind of, yeah. I was embarrassed as hell and didn't have a clue what I was doing, but I was pretty damn good for a first time. I'm a fast learner."

"Don't I know it."

She elbowed him in the rib.

He teased her again. It was too much fun not to. "So were you fantasizing about me?"

She hummed her agreement while she trailed lines up and down his abdomen. "Hmm, I was. I was thinking about you doing all sorts of things that I shouldn't have been thinking of. You were a very bad coach to be doing those things to me."

He laughed. "You said you were embarrassed. When did that stop? You definitely aren't shy about it now."

"I think it was about the third time I did it. I decided that it felt so good that I was never going to stop, so I might as well start acting like it was normal. I was downright daring when I bought my first vibrator. It shipped in a box that my mom could have opened if she got to it first."

He laughed again, harder this time, and she demanded to know what was so funny. "You know Lauren used to talk about you not being interested in sex, right? And the whole time you're having vibrators shipped in right under your mum's nose and getting off thinking about your coach."

"Yeah, well now I'm getting off _with_ my coach, so apparently I was doing something right. What about you? When was the first time you thought about me?" she asked.

"Remember the day I measured you?"

She raised herself higher on her arm. "What the hell, Sasha! You got off on me being a complete bitch to you?"

"You're sexy when you're angry." She didn't buy his excuse, even though it was part true, so he continued. "Okay fine, it wasn't just that. It was the culmination of three or four days and I was trying really hard for it not to be you that I was thinking about."

"So what started it? What happened three or four days before that?"

"You took your shirt off while you were working out, and your body was a bit… different." He didn't want to say 'your breasts and hips were bigger.'

Payson had no such compunctions. "You mean my boobs were bigger. What is it with men and boobs? That's what got Austin going on me, too."

"Actually it was your hips. Don't get me wrong, I noticed the boobs, but it was the hips that really made me want you. They're the perfect size to grab onto."

She rolled her eyes. "Oh my God, who did I get into bed with?"

He tugged her back down to the mattress and kissed her neck before he answered, "The man you're in love with. And the man who's in love with you."

She kissed him again and moaned into his mouth, and they stopped speaking for a good long while. She had a photo shoot the next day in New York, so they only had the afternoon and tonight to make up for what they would miss that weekend.

As much as he was ashamed to admit it, Sasha was glad that Payson was making this trip alone. He trusted Austin and he could come to terms with them sleeping in the same bed on occasion, like she had shared a bed with Sasha while she was still dating Austin, but this was too new for him to be comfortable with that arrangement. It would take time and Payson understood that. Luckily this trip was always planned to be a girls' weekend, so it wasn't an issue. Andy was coming over from Boston and Beth was flying in from Des Moines so that they could all stay at Kaylie's place together. There was nothing in that plan that would make Sasha uncomfortable.

"What are you thinking about?" Payson asked. He glanced down to find Payson's eyes open looking at him. She had been dozing for the last several minutes with her head resting on his abdomen while he sat up against the pillows.

"So you're awake now, huh? I thought I wore you out."

"Believe me, Sasha, I'll wear you out long before you wear me out," she teased. "But you're avoiding the question. What's got you so lost in thought?"

He hedged around the question. "I was thinking about this weekend. I'm glad that you'll get to spend a little bit of time with the girls. It's good for to be around more people your age. You don't get enough of that here."

She placed a kiss on his abs. "You are very good at BS, Sasha."

"Huh?"

"Everything you just said, complete BS." She sounded more amused than angry. "I'm sure you meant it, but that is not what you were thinking about. You were thinking about Austin."

"How do you _do_ that?" It was uncanny how she always knew what he was thinking.

She kissed his abs again, in a slightly different spot. "I know you, Sasha. I know how your mind works. If you're thinking about this weekend then you're thinking about Austin and how you don't want me to sleep with him."

"I'm sorry," he said. "I'm trying to be okay with this."

"I know. Don't feel guilty about this, Sasha. It's going to take time. It's going to take time for me and Austin to feel comfortable with it, too. We don't have rush things."

In a strange way it was good to know that she was struggling with this too. It meant that she wasn't taking it lightly.

He was about to respond when he suddenly realized exactly what she was doing. She was leaving a trail of kisses along his abdomen and he was caught up enough in his thoughts that he didn't even notice. "Christ, love, you really are trying to wear me out."

"Two months," she whined. "More than two months! Two months with nothing but my own hands and hardly anything more for a month before that."

He laughed at her petulance. He didn't love the reminder that she was having sex with Austin a recently as two months ago, but it was something he would have to come to terms with. And he could appreciate her dilemma. He'd been in bed with her all those nights that she was so desperate that masturbated in her sleep. He knew how hard it had been on her.

"I know, love, but if you give me a heart attack you're going to have to go a lot longer than just two months," he joked.

She had somehow worked her way up his body far enough for her to place a wet kiss over his nipple. "So don't have a heart attack. There are other things you can do that won't send you into cardiac arrest, and they would work just as well."

He was in over his head, drowning in Payson. This woman was going to be the death of him.

* * *

><p>AN: Geesh, Sasha can be so melodramatic sometimes ;) Good thing he has Payson to knock him upside the head every once in a while.

A while back I wrote a little piece of smut that I said was a tag for something ya'll hadn't even read yet. The exact place it came from was when Payson admitted her attraction for Sasha and Kim said, "How long has this been going on?" I liked it so much that I ended up putting bits and pieces of it all though this chapter. If you haven't read that oneshot and would like to, it's on my livejournal (username flowerchild3286) and called Revelations.


	80. Chapter 80

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

A/N: I adore Beth.

* * *

><p>Beth wasn't jealous of Payson. Well, she was, but only as far as gymnastics went. There wasn't a gymnast in the world, and not many regular girls either, who didn't want to be like Payson. She was the greatest gymnast the world had ever seen. You'd have to be crazy not to want to be like her.<p>

No, it was the other stuff that Beth wasn't jealous of. The fame. She saw how hard it was on her friend to always be under the microscope, how people wouldn't leave her alone and didn't respect her privacy. Lauren and Kaylie liked the fame, but they were very outgoing people by nature, and Emily hardly noticed it. Poor Kelly just removed herself from it. She spent time in the Philippines or hid the apartment she shared with Emily, changed her hair and the way she dressed, stayed away from the cameras and let her friends take the limelight. Kelly spent her whole childhood as her mother's puppet and she just wanted to be normal for a while. She was happier that way than she ever had been as a celebrity, and she deserved some happiness in her life. She had more than her fair share of hurt and sadness.

For the most part Payson embraced it out of sheer necessity. She was the most famous of all the golden team, really one of the most famous athletes in the world right now, so she couldn't escape the attention. Trying to hide from it would just make it harder for her. The press are like wild dogs, she said once. If you give them something to chew on they'll leave you alone for a few minutes, but if you don't give them anything they'll attack.

Some of the other gymnasts, the ones who were jealous, said that Payson chased the fame because she had all those big endorsements, but all she was doing was giving the world something to chew on. Plus she did it for the money, but not in a bad way. She was loaded, but she took her money and did good things with it like paying off her parents' house or giving to charity. There were girls all over the U.S. who were only able to do gymnastics because Payson gave them a scholarship. The only thing extravagant that Beth had ever seen Payson buy was shoes. She did buy lots of those, but Beth figured that anyone who gave millions of dollars to charity couldn't be blamed for spending two thousand on a pair of shoes.

She bought them all a pair of shoes, too. From anyone else Beth wouldn't have accepted, and Payson still had to talk her into it, but she took them because she knew that Payson really wanted her to. She tried to get off buying at least a slightly cheaper pair, but Payson caught her looking at this amazing pair of boots when they first came into the store and made her get them. She felt like Cinderella when she put them on, even if they were boots instead of glass slippers.

Payson _looked_ like Cinderella right now. They put her in all these fancy dresses and had her take pictures leaning against stuff or standing in front of their fake wind so that her dress swirled around her. They were real model shots, too, the kind where she wasn't looking at the camera and had this real mysterious look on her face.

These were the pictures for Chanel, Payson said. They were going to be in all the magazines and even up on billboards, and they were doing a whole issue of Vogue where all the ads were for Chanel stuff and Payson was on the cover. Beth couldn't imagine having her picture everywhere like that when she was great big pregnant. Payson didn't look like a hippo like some pregnant women do, though. She looked glamorous.

Payson warned them that the photo shoot and interview stuff would last for a long time, and she wasn't lying. The Chanel ads took forever because they kept stopping to have her change clothes or redo her hair and makeup, but then the photo shoot for Vogue took even longer.

This was her food for the dogs again. Everybody was eating her up because she got pregnant, like it was the biggest deal in the world, and when Payson and Austin didn't answer their questions people started making stuff up. Now Payson had to do an interview to clear everything up when it shouldn't have been anyone else's business in the first place, and she had to pretend like she was happy to do it.

The pictures for the magazine started out really nice, just Payson dressed in nice clothes and being normal while the photographer did cool stuff with the angle of the camera, but then they started doing things that were a little more _risqué_. Those were the ones where Payson's belly was showing and she was sitting or laying in really sexy ways, and then one where her belly wasn't showing but she was wearing a tight black top and had her hair tousled and swept to one side while she leaned up against a table. That one was Beth's favorite, because it was sexy and glamorous at the same time. She hoped that she would be able to pull off looking that good when she had a baby.

Beth thought for a moment that they might be done with the pictures, because Payson stopped and came over to where she, Andy, and Kaylie were sitting to watch, but she was just coming to say something. "Okay, guys, I'm warning you now… these next ones are going to be nude. So feel free to stay and watch or if you're not comfortable seeing that you can go to the break area and watch TV or go do something else for a while. I'm not going to be offended either way."

She'd said that before, that if they got bored they didn't have to stay. She wanted to make sure that they didn't feel like they were stuck there, but this was different. This wasn't 'if you're bored.' This was 'if you don't want to see me naked.' Beth kind of wanted to stay because she was interested to see how exactly you did nude pregnancy pictures, but she felt like that was weird.

"Is it weird that I want to stay?" Andy asked. This was exactly why Andy was her best friend. They were always on the same wavelength, and it had been that way since they met four years ago. When Beth was thirteen and made her first junior national team, a couple of the other members picked on her and Andy marched right up and told them what's what. Andy was ranked third on the team then, behind Payson and Kelly, so all the other girls did what she said, and they had been best friends ever since. She said back then that those other girls were just jealous, and she was probably right because Beth ended being the junior national champion the year Andy, Kelly, and Payson moved up to seniors. It was kind of funny to think that three of the Olympic team members had never even been on the junior team.

Payson laughed at Andy's question. "No, it's not weird. I get it completely. You just want to see what a nude photo shoot is like, right?"

"Exactly," said Beth. Now that Andy put it out there she was less embarrassed to want to stay, too.

Kaylie stood up. "Well, I'm not all that curious and I've been scarred enough by hearing you have sex ten times a night in London, so I'm going to leave. You guys can call me when you're done."

"That is gross exaggeration, Kaylie," Payson said. "We never had sex ten times in one night. We topped off at eight."

Andy and Beth both snickered at the joke, but Kaylie just said "Ew" and left. It was probably less funny if you had to live through it. Beth couldn't imagine how uncomfortable it must have been for the other girls to hear Payson and Austin having sex.

They had to take a break to re-set some stuff (it was amazing how they could make one studio look like so many different places), so Payson sat down in Kaylie's abandoned seat and said, "Oh, it feels so good to actually sit down. It's just not the same when you're doing it for a picture."

Beth didn't really understand because she'd never experienced that, but she took Payson's word for it. "I don't understand how you do this stuff," she said. "I feel self-conscious when people take just normal old pictures of me, much less pregnant and much, _much_ less naked."

Payson shrugged her shoulder. "You get used to it, I guess. I used to be uncomfortable, but then I figured out that they photoshop everything and you end up looking ten times better than you do in real life."

"But what about the naked part?" Andy asked. "I can sort of get having them done, I mean, not like Playboy or anything, but this and the Body Issue. I just don't understand how you can take your clothes off in front of everybody like this."

"I don't think I could have done it before Austin. Partly it's because I got used to being naked in front of someone, which was definitely new, but then he's always made me feel so beautiful. Even now, when I kind of feel like a house sometimes, he tells me I'm beautiful all the time. On Sunday we were watching a movie and he just out of nowhere says 'Do you have any idea how sexy you are?' It makes this all easier because I don't feel like I have anything to be ashamed of."

Beth wanted to ask about why Austin was saying stuff like that when they were broken up, but they weren't supposed to talk about that in public, so she would wait until tonight. As far as the rest of the world was concerned Austin and Payson were still together, because the press would eat her alive if they knew she wasn't with the father of her baby anymore. That was one more thing on the long list of reasons that Beth wasn't jealous of Payson. Her private life wasn't private anymore.

Payson wasn't bluffing about feeling comfortable doing the nude stuff. When they were ready to shoot again she wasn't shy about taking her clothes off and she didn't so much as flinch when a make up artist put some kind of bronzer all over her body. Beth asked why they did that since it was going to be photoshopped anyway, and they said that it was like putting make up on your face. They can photoshop afterward but it's a lot easier if there is make up to start with.

"This is nothing," Payson said. "Last time I had a hickey on the inside of my thigh. Now _that_ is an awkward place to have someone put make up on."

"You had a hickey on the inside of your _thigh_?" Beth cried. "Why would you have a hickey there?"

Payson scrunch up her face. "Oh geez, I'm going to corrupt you. I'm sorry Beth, I shouldn't have said that. I got so used to being around Lauren that things like that just pop out without me thinking about it."

"Well you might as well tell me now. If you don't I'm just going to google it later." Sometimes she felt left out because she didn't know much about this kind of stuff. Andy said that she was sheltered but Lauren said that could be a good thing sometimes because knowing too much put ideas in your head.

"Do not ever, _ever_ google anything about sex," Payson said. "If you want to know something then ask one of us. The internet skews stuff. I'll explain it to you later when we're not in the middle of a photography studio, okay?"

"Don't bother," said Andy, and then she leaned over and whispered in Beth's ear.

"Oh. Ew."

Payson started laughing really hard and Beth started to feel embarrassed, but Payson must have realized that because she said, "I'm not laughing at you, Beth, I swear. I'm laughing because a year ago I would have had the exact same reaction."

"So what changed?"

She snorted. "Someone did it to me. Trust me, it feels a lot better than it sounds."

She would trust Payson on that, because she definitely wasn't going to go out and look for proof. Maybe someday she would let someone do that to her, but it would have to be someone she really loved and really trusted because that was not a place she wanted anybody hanging out.

They called Payson back to the set, which was now a bed, and they started taking pictures. Nude pregnancy pictures were kind of a thing right now (it was way too much of a cliché to say it was _in vogue_) but these shots were definitely not à la Demi Moore. Instead of awkwardly covering her boobs and cradling her baby bump, Payson was doing really sexy things.

At one point she was lying on a shiny floor with her arms and legs arranged so that all the important bits were covered, and the photographer said, "Okay, Payson, let's move that left hand a little bit lower."

"_No_," Payson said, which was unusual because she was pretty laid back about most of this stuff. "That is taking this too far."

Beth tilted her head, trying to figure out why Payson was so adamant, and she realized exactly where that hand would be if she moved it lower. She blushed, but Payson was around Lauren too much and didn't censor anything. "I am not taking pictures where it looks like I'm masturbating. If you want those kind of pictures go work for Playboy."

The photographer was offended so the shoot didn't last much longer, which Payson seemed grateful for. Her plane landed that morning and they only had time for a quick lunch and shoe-shopping expedition before they went to the studio, so she went for most of the day with no break. It was cool to watch, but being the one in the pictures for so many hours must be exhausting, and she still had to come back for the interview the next day.

So, no, as much as Beth admired her friends talent, she wasn't jealous. Most kids dream about being famous one day, but spending time with Payson always made Beth feel incredibly lucky that she _wasn't_ famous.

o-O-o

Cover Story: Payson Keeler opens up about her pregnancy, the Olympics, and her life threatening illness

By: Kacey Andrews

With her awe-inducing talent, breathtaking beauty, and famously dry wit it is no wonder that five time Olympic gold medalist Payson Keeler is one of the most talked about athletes in the world, but lately she has given the world even more to talk about. Her life over the past six months has been a whirlwind of gossip-worthy events, including a secret romance, a life threatening illness, a record breaking performance at the Olympics, and lastly, perhaps the most talked about event of all, a very unexpected pregnancy. She sits down with us today to give us the truth behind her extraordinary life.

KA: Payson, let's start with an easy question, but one that a lot of people have been curious about. How long have you been dating Austin Tucker?

PK: Since March of last year. We kept it quiet for most of that time, but March was the beginning.

KA: Why did you keep it quiet? Why bother hiding a relationship, and why did you choose to go public with it during the Olympics?

PK: There were a lot of reasons that we didn't tell people, the biggest of which was that we wanted to keep it out of the press. It's hard to have a relationship when everybody is scrutinizing you. By the time the Olympics rolled around, though, we just couldn't do it anymore. The Olympics are a very emotional time so it's hard to hide your feelings, and I really needed his support. That was the lowest point for me as far as my health goes, and I couldn't have got through that time without him.

KA: Tell us about that. You were rushed to the hospital by ambulance on the first day of competition in London, but you knew before then that you were ill. What made the Olympics your low point?

PK: I was sickest during the Olympics, definitely, and then that first day when I was taken to the hospital we got the big news. Before that there was a question mark hanging over my head. We didn't have a clear grasp on what was wrong, and I was afraid that I wasn't going to get better, but that day in the hospital we got answers. We found out that there was no cure, and that if we couldn't find a way to compensate—[Payson pauses to wipe her eyes. She's crying.]—I'm sorry. This is why I don't talk about this stuff. They told me that day that they were going to start a new treatment and it was the last shot. If it didn't work I wasn't going to live.

KA: You said there was no cure, but you're better now. How does that work?

PK: I'm better, yes, but not cured. My blood is still killing itself. All the medicine does is help me make more new blood to replace it. That's how I was healthy growing up. My body made way more blood than a normal person would to compensate for how fast it was dying. Now I have to have check ups for the rest of my life, and probably treatments on and off. Alex has to be tested for the same abnormality when he's born, and so will any other children I have. This isn't something that will ever go away for me.

KA: Alex? That's the baby?

PK: Yes, that's him.

KA: There has been a lot of speculation that the pregnancy was involved in why you got sick, but you said a few weeks ago that your illness caused your pregnancy. What did you mean by that?

PK: That's been taken out of context. Someone asked if my health problems were caused by the pregnancy and I said it was more the other way around. I didn't mean that the eryptosis caused me to get pregnant. The connection wasn't medical, it was emotional. We were scared. We didn't know if I was going to get better and at the time we didn't even know why I was sick, so we were living with the mindset that we might not have much time left together. It's easy to say now that we should have been more careful, but birth control isn't at the front of your mind when you don't know if you're going to live.

KA: You said you didn't know if you were going to live. Most people assume that the good news you got on the last day of competition was that there was a breakthrough in your treatment and that was the beginning of you getting better. So were you pregnant during the Olympics?

PK: When I do the math, yes, I was pregnant during the Olympics.

KA: But you didn't know?

PK: No, I didn't.

KA: Are you concerned that the intense physical demands of your sport may have harmed the baby during the early weeks of the pregnancy?

PK: I was when I first found out. I was very concerned, but the doctors all assured me that the baby was fine. It's not uncommon for professional athletes to compete before they know they're pregnant, and the research is showing that it doesn't cause any problems with the pregnancy. My biggest concern was about being sick. The placenta needs a lot of blood to form in those first few weeks, and I just didn't have any to offer, but the body provides for the baby first. I didn't have enough blood to support myself, but I had enough blood to give Alex what he needed. I've been really closely monitored and everything is fine. He's healthy.

KA: So you're not worried anymore?

PK: I'm a mother, of course I'm still worried. I know in my head that Alex is healthy, but it's a lot harder to tell your emotions that. We had ultrasounds a lot at the beginning, because I was a high risk pregnancy, but as I got healthier and further into the pregnancy they stopped doing them every week. When we went for a regular 20 week ultrasound I was a mess. Austin kept me grounded, kept reminding me that the doctors said he was fine, but I needed to see to believe. You can't just get over a fear like that, no matter how irrational it might be. It's like how I'm still afraid that I'm going to die. The risk is mostly gone, but I can't get rid of the fear yet.

KA: That's so hard to grasp, that you were afraid of dying while you were competing at the Olympics. You handled it very well.

PK: That was out of necessity. The only way that we could get through it was the push everything to the back of our heads and concentrate on the positive. I didn't let myself really think about it until after the worst danger had passed. A month or so after we got those first good blood results back I broke down. I think I scared Austin. He woke up in the middle of the night and I was—[She's crying again.]—I was hysterical, to say the least. It's impossible to explain. Nobody would be able to understand except the people who have been though it themselves.

KA: So what got you through it?

PK: The people around me. It's a long list and I've said them all before, but mainly it was Austin and Sasha, I think. My parents couldn't be around for a lot of this because it was happening inside the Olympic Village, so Sasha had to be the reasonable one. Austin and I couldn't. We weren't in a place where we could handle the truth yet. We needed the denial.

KA: So what did you and Austin do? You said that you pushed it to the back of your head. How did you manage to do that?

PK: Honestly, we spent a lot of time making love. It's life affirming. People talk about us being all over each other while we were in London, and yeah, we were, but sometimes it felt like that was all that was keeping me alive. I told Austin once that I was addicted to touch. I needed it to feel anchored to the world. If you go back and watch footage from those few weeks you can see it. If Austin couldn't be with me then Sasha, Emily, and Lauren always made sure to hold my hand or wrap an arm around me, anything to keep me grounded.

KA: Let's talk about those weeks. You were sick, scared for your life, and barely able to stand sometimes, but you managed to win a record breaking five gold medals.

PK: Four. I don't care what the judges said, Lauren won the beam finals. She was better than me that day.

KA: Okay, we'll split the difference and call it four and a half. How did it feel to win in the face of such adversity?

PK: You know, a lot of people expect me to say that it was so much more special because of all the challenges, but it's not. Don't get me wrong, I'm honored to have won and so, so thankful for the experience, but more than ever I realize that it's just a medal. I was lucky enough to stand on the medal podium, but what I felt up there was nothing compared to when I got the news that my blood levels stayed steady over the course of three days. Not going up, mind you, not being normal, just not getting worse. For 72 hours my body made enough blood not to undo the help of the transfusion and that was a million and one times better than winning a gold medal.

KA: So did your illness ruin the Olympics for you?

PK: No, not at all. It wasn't a bad Olympics, it was just a different one than I expected. And I do believe that being at the Olympics during the worst time helped me, because it gave me something else to think about. If I was thinking about competing there was less room for me to think about how sick I was.

KA: Are you proud of what you accomplished in London?

PK: Very. It was the result of thirteen years of hard work, and I'm very proud of that. The Olympics are important, and it's a worthy thing to devote your life to. I just don't think it's the most important thing in the world anymore.

KA: But you never really did put winning first, did you? That's why you won the sportsmanship award, the Pierre de Coubertine Medal, because you always put people ahead of winning.

PK: It worries me a little that people think that's special. Shouldn't that be the way it is for everybody? I am incredibly honored, though. The Coubertine Medal means more to me than any other award I've ever been given.

KA: It's not very common, is it?

PK: No, it's not. That's why it means so much to me.

KA: That ceremony was shortly after news broke about your pregnancy. Was it relieving to move away from so much negative attention and into something positive?

PK: It was in a way, yes. It took my mind off of all the horrible things people were saying. I tried to let it roll of my back, and most of it I did, but it was hard to watch people take something that I was so happy about and twist it into something bad.

KA: What were people saying?

PK: I got a lot of people telling me that I was going to hell or calling me a whore, but the ones that got to me were the ones about Alex. People said that they hoped he died, called him a lot of really offensive names. There were a lot of sexual comments made about him, and those were the ones that disturbed me most. I don't understand how anybody could be warped enough to say those things about a baby.

KA: That's so horrible. How did you deal with that?

PK: Mostly I ignored it. I tried to focus on my family, focus on getting ready for the baby. I just refused to let people ruin something so wonderful.

KA: So you are happy about the baby, even though the pregnancy was unexpected?

PK: I'm thrilled. We both are. I won't lie and say that we weren't scared when we first found out, but I think that changed with the first ultrasound. We saw his heart beating and that was just… the most amazing thing I've ever seen. After that we just felt lucky to have been given such an amazing gift.

KA: If you were so happy about it, then why did you keep it a secret?

PK: We didn't. We kept it quiet for a while, with just our family—our whole family, so our teams and coaches too, not just the people related by blood—and then we told the gym when I was a little farther along. We wanted to make sure that everything was safe before we were open about it. We weren't upfront with the press for the same reason that we didn't come forward with our relationship for so many months. We wanted our privacy. I deserve the same right to privacy as any other woman.

KA: You're not just any woman, though. You're eighteen. Are you ready to be a mother?

PK: Is anyone ever really ready to be a mother? It's always going to be a challenge, and nobody is ever going to be a perfect parent. But yes, I think I'm as ready as any woman ever is for a first baby. Most people think of an eighteen year old as still being a child, and that is true for some eighteen year olds, but it's not a universal rule. I've been an adult for a long time. I don't think anyone could ever experience the things I've been through and not grow up.

KA: Okay, Payson, I have one more question, and this is one that a lot of our younger readers are anxious to know about. Are you through with gymnastics?

PK: No. Actually, Austin and I were just talking about this a few days ago, about how neither of us could imagine me not being in the gym. I'm coaching at the Rock, and that's something that I really love, and then after Alex is born I'll be back on the equipment myself. Gymnastics is a part of who I am, and I'm not going to leave that behind.

o-O-o

Sasha wanted to drive Payson to the airport and then pick her up again on Sunday, but she said no. She left after morning classes on Saturday and he still had work to do, she argued, and it would look bad to the media if they happened to catch him picking her up. Driving herself and valeting the car was no different than Austin driving them and valeting the car.

She was right, of course, and there was no legitimate reason for him to drive her, but he couldn't move past the protective streak that didn't want her to be alone. Also, if he was honest with himself, he wanted that small amount of extra time with her. Less than forty eight hours, that's all the time they had together before she left. He wanted every minute that he could get.

He kept looking at the clock. She called him from the airport when she landed, and he hoped she would be back by now. He knew that the drive could be a little longer or shorter depending on the traffic, but he was frustrated that she seemed to be on the long side of that curve.

He waited by the entrance when he heard her car, and apparently she was just as frustrated as he was, because she was barely through the door before she lunged to kiss him. They didn't make it to the bedroom. They barely made it into the living room and to the couch, and most of their clothes were within a few feet of the front door.

It wasn't until the initial need was satisfied that they managed to speak.

"Oh God," Payson said, "I've wanted that all weekend. And I slept in the same bed as Kaylie last night so I couldn't even take care of it myself."

He chuckled. "That's a brave thing to do considering the state you've been in."

"Not really. It hasn't been nearly as bad these past few weeks. Don't get me wrong, I still want it, but I can control it a lot better now."

He raised a doubtful eyebrow. "It doesn't seem like you've been controlling it very well to me."

"Yeah, well, it's a lot harder when I'm around you. Since I'm not remotely turned on by Kaylie, there wasn't much risk of me doing something in my sleep." Sasha allowed himself an internal smirk that he had such an effect on her.

"What if it was Lauren? She was the one in all your dreams."

There was a long pause and then, "Lauren might have been a problem."

He roared with laughter and Payson hit him. "Should I be concerned about this?" he asked. "Are you going to leave me for a woman someday?"

"I might if you keep acting like this. Don't be a jerk. Dreams about other women aren't that unusual, and think about it… of all the women I know, who does it make sense for me to have a sex dream about?"

She had a good point. Lauren was the obvious choice, and for some reason Sasha thought that he would be more worried if she was having dreams about Kaylie. There was something a lot weirder about that. He had a moment of inappropriate curiosity, which he had a lot around Payson. "So who do you think the other girls would dream about if they were pregnant?"

She thought for a moment. "Hmm… I'm pretty sure that Lauren would dream about me. Kaylie would _definitely_ dream about Kelly, and I think Kelly would dream about Emily. Emily I'm not sure about. Before I would have said Lauren, but now they're kind of like sisters so that seems less likely. I don't think it would be Kaylie, so I guess either Kelly or me. Or maybe Andy. I could see her dreaming about Andy."

"So nobody's going to dream about Kaylie?" he asked, laughing.

"She doesn't exactly scream sex."

It was true. He never did understand why so many boys flocked to Kaylie, but he guessed there was a key word there. _Boys_ flocked to Kaylie. Men flocked to Payson. Emily got a lot of attention from boys as well, but she'd been in a serious relationship for so long that everyone else backed off. Lauren seemed to attract arses, so they were all glad that she was finally in a healthy relationship, and Kelly was an unknown entity. She got burned badly, so nobody knew what was going to happen for her.

They moved away from a conversation that was starting to disturb him. He ordered dinner in before she got home so that they didn't have to bother cooking or going out, and they sat naked on the couch while they ate. It was an oddly comfortable arrangement.

She told him about her weekend between bites. "The Chanel and Vogue stuff was a pain in the ass, but that was expected. I think the only photo shoot I've ever actually had fun at was the Body Issue one, because my photographer was freaking hilarious. This one not so much. He tried to get me to do a shot that looked like I was masturbating, and when I said no he got all pissy and ended the shoot."

"Sounds like a total arse."

"Pretty much, yeah."

"What about the interview?" he asked. "How did that go?"

"As planned. A little bit of truth and a whole lot of crap. More truth than I expected, though."

"At least it's over now. You've got a public statement out so people can't complain that you're hiding things. What happened otherwise?" The interview and photo shoots were the required part of the weekend, but she had fun parts as well.

"I got pestered about where Austin was a lot. The phrase 'We're having a girls' weekend' got old fast, but the actual girls' weekend part of it was fun. It was good to hang out with Andy and Beth again since I don't get to see them as often. I'm corrupting poor Beth, though."

This set Sasha to laughing again. "Oh god, what did you say?"

"Oh, I just kept saying stupid things without thinking about it. Like when they were putting make up on me for the nude part of the shoot, I made the comment that last time I did this I had a hickey on the inside of my leg. And she's so sweet you know, and just doesn't know anything, like I didn't when I was her age, but she's a teenager so of course she asked why. So I had to explain oral sex to her, and you might not get this because you're a guy, but those conversations never just stop with the plain hard facts. I'm the only one who's ever done it, so Beth and Andy are asking me all these questions, and then the natural progression is to end up talking about blow jobs, too."

"You're right, I don't get it. That's way more than I ever want to know about another man's sex life." Men did a lot of heckling and boasting, but nobody ever sat down and gave details. "So that's how you're corrupting Beth, by telling her the ins and outs of oral sex?" He was pretty sure that there was a pun there, but he didn't want to think too hard about it.

"If only. Talking about sex always spirals out of control. You know how I said the photographer wanted me to look like I was masturbating in one of the pictures? Well, we were talking about that later that night and Kaylie of all people asked if I do that because—get this—_she never has_." That was way, way, way too much information about Kaylie. Although he wasn't surprised. "And of course Beth hasn't, because like I said, she's me before I met you. Kaylie's embarrassed as hell, but Beth is curious, so Andy and I pretty much ended up giving her tips."

"Wow, you weren't kidding. You are corrupting her."

"I know. She'll end up being a hellcat in bed when she's older, though. The good girls always are."

"Like you?" he teased.

Payson grinned. "Definitely like me. Kaylie, though, I have my doubts about. I told her to get her head out of her arse and start exploring or she was going to freak out the first time she has sex."

He started to tell her to stop saying things he didn't want to know about the other girls, but something else stuck in his brain. "Did you just say arse?"

Her mouth dropped open as she processed her own words. "Crap. Now you're corrupting me. You're turning me British!"

He laughed. She hit him. He kissed her. It was a natural progression that didn't end until she was screaming out his name in ecstasy. That was never going to get old, hearing her call his name while she fell apart. He saw her come so many times when she woke up with an orgasm, but it was different in this context. It was different when he was inside her.

She was sprawled out on the couch, still panting, when something drew her attention. It was the digital clock on their DVR. "Crap, is it really nine?"

"Looks like, love."

She pushed herself up to sitting and started to look for her underwear. "I know this is the worst, weirdest timing in the world, but I have to go see Austin. I've been home for hours and haven't seen him yet. I got too caught up in you."

This was going to take a lot of getting used to. He couldn't ask Payson to stop spending time with Austin, and he would never want to, but she was right. It was the worst, weirdest timing in the world. He remembered back at Thanksgiving when Kelly said their lives were well and truly fucked up, and realized again how true that was. Payson going to see Austin while she was still filled with Sasha's cum was fucked up, but it was the way their lives had to be for a while. They would figure it out eventually, but it was going to take time.

She was at the door when she finished getting dressed, because that's where their clothes were, but she came back to where he was still sitting on the couch. She bent to kiss him and said, "I'm sorry. I know this is hard for you. It's hard for me, too. I don't know how to balance you and Austin yet, but just remember that I love you."

She turned to leave, but he caught her hand before she could go. "I know that you love me, and I don't resent the time you spend with Austin. But when you get home I'm going to spend the rest of the night proving that you're mine."

She smiled down at him. "Good. I'm going to hold you to that."

o-O-o

"Coach, why am I here?" a petulant voice asked. "This is not the kind of gymnast I am."

"But it's the kind of gymnast you're going to be. You know all that crap people say about me being the greatest gymnast in history? What's the reason they give?"

"That you combine grace and power. I know that, Coach, but I'm not you. I'm not built for ballet."

Payson snorted. "Neither am I, Jess. I'm not built for gymnastics, either, so I don't accept body type as an excuse."

Viola smiled at the banter, because Payson acted the same way when she first came to the ballet studio more than a year ago. Now she was on the other side of it.

She dismissed the young girl she was working with and moved to greet her newest pupil and scold her former one. "Payson Keeler, do not expect to be welcomed here with open arms after all you've done. A year of working together and not one single thank you in all those lovely speeches you gave! And then after you won those precious gold medals you dropped out of my class without so much as a farewell. You don't deserve to step foot in this studio."

Unlike the Payson who Sasha first coerced into taking ballet classes, this Payson was confident enough to withstand the tirade. Her eyes twinkled while she said, "I'm sorry Viola, but I wanted to thank you in person rather than in an interview, and I've been so busy these past several months that I've barely had time to breathe. It's long overdue, but thank you so much for your help. I would never have made it to the Olympics without you."

Her skills were increased even since they last saw each other a few weeks before the Olympics, before Sasha called and said she was too sick to continue classes. By that point Payson could charm a room, but now she could do it in the face of blatant abuse. Viola hid her smile and redirected the conversation. "Well, you certainly are pregnant. Perhaps we should have spent a little more time working on first position for you, dear."

"Viola!"

"Oh, don't turn into a blushing virgin on me now. The jig is up, dear. You've already flipped your skirts at the world. Now, who is this new miscreant you've brought me? And will she cause me as much trouble as you did?"

Payson stifled a laugh. "At least as much trouble as I was. Maybe more. This is Jessica Torres. Jess, this is Madame Viola. Her bark is only slightly worse than her bite. Watch out for that cane—it hurts."

The poor girl was petrified. There was no telling what ideas Payson put in her head about this class. Viola's own dark sense of humor must have rubbed off.

She sent her pupils scurrying to the barre and began her reign of terror. When she critiqued Jessica she called across the room to where Payson was observing, "If I remember correctly, dear, Sasha joined you for several classes when you began here. Perhaps you should extend the same courtesy to Miss Torres."

"I would love to, Viola, but if I did a grand plié now I might not be able to get back up. You could send me into pre-term labor."

Once the barre exercises were underway, she moved to stand by Payson while she continued to call out instructions and the occasional creative insult. In between she managed to ask, "Are you quite alright, Payson?"

"I am now," the younger woman said. "It was touch and go for a while there, but I'm doing well now."

"I read the interview in Vogue yesterday. Absolute rubbish, parts of it, but I know other parts were true. You life truly was in danger?"

The only acknowledgement Payson gave was a slight nod of her head. "How did you know I was lying?"

"It didn't fit with what I know happened. When Sasha called to tell me that you wouldn't be back to class, that was the beginning. He was in too much shock to have known for months."

Payson didn't try to deny it or make excuses, which Viola respected. She moved back to her students to make corrections in their execution and gave Payson a moment to herself. When she returned Payson was ready to move on. "Sasha misses you," she said, quiet so that the dancers couldn't hear. "You should come to dinner at our place sometime. It's silly to live so close and never see each other."

Payson must have seen the confusion on Viola's face, because she said, "Sasha didn't tell you?"

"Tell me what?" She was fairly certain that she knew what, but she needed to hear it.

"We live together. We have for months, since I first found out I was pregnant."

"I'm going to need quite a bit more explanation than that, dear." She didn't for a second believe that anything untoward was going on, but there were certainly facts that she was missing.

"Why don't you come to dinner this Saturday and we can talk. We're the big green house off Placid Drive."

There were _several_ facts that she was missing. She wasn't aware that Sasha moved out of his apartment, much less into a house with a young woman. "I will see you on Saturday, then, and I expect a _very_ long discussion to take place."

o-O-o

Sasha got a text from Payson on Wednesday afternoon and a call from Viola shortly after. He knew that Payson was taking Jess to Viola for ballet lessons, but for some reason it never occurred to him that this would happen. He didn't even realize that he was avoiding his godmother until Payson texted him to say that she was coming to dinner that Saturday and expected to hear the truth about everything. Viola was the closest thing he had to a mother, and rather than face the possibility of her disapproval he hid from her. When she called he apologized and told her the gist of the situation. The only thing she disapproved of was him hiding it from her.

Payson was making Romanian stuffed peppers again, one of Viola's favorites as well. It was his mum's specialty, taught to her by Sasha's bunică when his parents first married, and it made them both think of her. If he wasn't so nervous he would have tried to sneak bites out of the kitchen. He was nervous like this when he and Payson told Mark about the change in their relationship, as well.

Mark took it surprisingly well. They didn't talk to him until Monday since Payson was gone for the weekend, but Kim told him on Friday and he had time to digest the news. He said that he'd been expecting this to happen for more than a year, and that he stopped wanting to kill Sasha a few months ago. Kim was considerably more upset than Mark was. Sasha suspected that she still wanted Payson to get back together with Austin. She was coming around, but it would take a while because it was so unexpected for her, whereas Austin and Mark seemed to know it was going to happen.

He wasn't telling Viola that his relationship had changed with Payson, though, because she never even knew that they had a relationship. They had more than half a year to explain to her.

When his godmother got there, Payson did almost all of the talking. She showed Viola around the house, in particular the nursery, and when they stopped in front of the trophy cases Viola ghosted her hands across the glass in front of Sasha's trophies and medals. "It's good to see these again," she said. "I haven't seen them since Katherine died." Her voice drifted to a whisper. "It was so unfair for her to be taken so young."

His throat tightened. The subject was off limits, the one thing that they never, ever talked about, and this was the first time Viola had breached it since they sat in the church with Jayden holding his hand while Viola and Charlotte flanked them on either side. Jayden was the only one allowed to talk about it because she was a thirteen year old kid and didn't know any better, but even she grew out of it.

Payson didn't need to say anything. She squeezed his hand and kissed him on the cheek and then left to give them privacy. When Viola spoke again her voice was hoarse and strained, like she was trying hard not to cry. "Payson was right. It's silly for us to live so close and never see one another."

Guilt washed over him. She moved to Colorado to be closer to him, and he distanced himself from her out of cowardice. He and Jayden took the place of the children she couldn't have, and Jayden was on tour half the year so he was it for her most of the time. "I'm so sorry, Vi. I haven't been fair to you."

He could see her putting on her tough skin. He shoulders straightened and she lifted her chin and looked every bit the ballerina that she was. When she spoke it was with what Sasha always thought of as her 'Madame Viola voice.' "Well, dear, I suppose I can forgive you this once, but don't expect me to go so easy on you again."

"There won't be an again."

They both shrugged off the melancholy atmosphere. "In that case," she said, "Let's go see what your young lady is capable of. She's quite a talented woman. Do her skills extend to the kitchen?"

"They do. She might be a better cook than dancer."

"I'll hold out judgment on that. She's a great natural talent and she's had quite a good teacher, you know. There are girls in the corps de ballet who don't dance as well as she does." It was an exaggeration, of course, but not by far. Payson might not make it into a professional ballet, but she would be one of the later dancers eliminated. She had more natural talent than she would ever realize.

They found Payson in the dining room setting the table. With a single look she asked him if he was okay and he assured her that he was. Their ability to communicate with eye contact grew stronger the longer they lived together.

They talked about general things for most of dinner, but every once in a while Viola would bring the conversation back around to the overarching topic. For instance, in the middle of the meal she changed the subject and asked, "So how does this work, dear, you splitting your time between Sasha and the father of your child?"

"Very awkwardly, so far," Payson replied, "but we're learning to balance it. It works better when Austin spends more time over here, so I don't feel like I'm constantly running out on one or the other. It's hard on all three of us right now, but it's getting easier. It helps that Austin supports my relationship with Sasha and Sasha supports my relationship with Austin. If they weren't so understanding this wouldn't work at all."

Viola raised an eyebrow and asked him, "You support her relationship with Austin?"

"I do," he said with a nod. "They have a baby together, and I don't want to come between that. Besides, we've pretty much just switched places. Before she was dating Austin and incredibly close with me; now she's with me and incredibly close with Austin. Austin never resented me, so what right do I have to resent him?"

Payson was looking at him with surprise. "I've never thought of it that way. That's exactly what happened."

"And was this switch very sudden?" Viola asked.

"No," Payson said. "Sasha and I have been together for a couple of weeks. Austin and I haven't been together for months."

Viola switched subjects so fast that Sasha's head spun. "Well, Payson, this is delicious. Sasha said that you cook even better than you dance. I disagree with him, but you do come rather close."

Payson rolled with the change far better than Sasha did, and the two women continued talking as if the whole conversation never happened. He was almost glad when dinner was over because the back and forth was confusing the hell out of him.

He helped Payson carry the dishes back into the kitchen so that she could bring out dessert, an experimental treacle tart that turned out amazing, but as soon as they put down the dishes he swung her around and slammed his mouth to hers. She responded out of instinct, but when they separated she breathed out, "What was that for?"

"Do I need a reason to kiss you?"

"Not really," she said, mimicking his whispered tone, "but the timing is rather strange. Your godmother is waiting for us to come back to the other room."

Her reasoning didn't stop her from lifting her mouth up for another kiss. He pressed his lips against hers again and said, "I love you, that's what the kiss was for. I love you for not blaming me for hiding this from Viola and I love you for working so hard to make this night go well."

"I love you, too, Sasha. What's important to you is important to me. But we can't stay here kissing all night. Viola is waiting for us."

She was right, so they went back to the dining room to finish dinner. When the last crumbs of dessert were cleared from their plates, Viola volunteered Sasha to help clean up. "The cook never cleans," she told Payson. "Go relax while Sasha and I take care of the kitchen."

Payson resisted, but Viola Pettigrew always got her way, so a few minutes later Sasha was alone with his godmother in kitchen, but she didn't start rinsing the dishes. She waited until Payson was safely in the living room and slipped a set of rings from her fingers. She pressed them into Sasha's palm and closed his hand around them.

"Viola, what—"

She cut off his question. "Henry saved for a year to buy me those rings. We had thirty four very happy years together, but I cannot honor his memory by hanging onto the past. He would want you to have them. I hope that you and Payson will get more than just thirty four years together."

"Vi, we've only been together for two weeks."

"I was the very first person in this world to hold you, Sasha Belov, even before Katherine, so I know you. You love her. You love her the way Henry and I loved each other. Don't waste this time; you and I both know how quickly it can pass."

It was clear what she was alluding to—the early death of his mother and the later but equally unfair death of Viola's husband two years ago. There was no reason for Henry's heart attack, no medical problems or unhealthy life styles to blame it on. He was fine one day and gone the next.

There was nothing he could say to make Viola's pain any less, so he said the only thing he could think of: "Thank you, Vi. Thank you."

o-O-o

They were climbing into bed by the time Payson finally asked, "What happened, Sasha? You never talk about it. It's not healthy to bottle everything up."

He always knew it was a matter of time before she asked. She let him get away with not talking about his mum for an entire year, but he always knew it would happen eventually. He couldn't keep something that big from her, so for the first time in fourteen years he opened up about him mum's death. "She had cancer—uterine cancer to begin with, but by the time they found it she had a tumor in her lung, too. Stage four, they said. Six months to live at most."

Payson moved closer to him and took his hand, trying to give him either comfort or strength. He wasn't looking at her and she didn't ask him too. "How long did she actually have?"

"Nine weeks." He swallowed hard and tried to force the pain back down. "Viola and Charlotte were there every single day, they dropped everything and flew in as soon as we got the news. Dad never made it back to England. The European Championships were coming up. He thought he'd have time when they were over."

He tried to keep the bitterness out of his voice, but he couldn't do it. He'd never forgiven his father for that. Sasha competed in those Championships three weeks after his mum's funeral, full of grief and without having touched an apparatus for months, just to spite his dad. It was the first time he ever competed for England, and he won on the adrenaline of bitterness. They didn't speak for thirteen years after that. The girls would never know how much he loved them to contact his father after so many years just so they would have a coach for World Trials.

Payson stiffened beside him, either shocked by what his father did or responding to the wave of anger coming off Sasha. She pressed a hand to his face and finally made him look at her. "You are not like him," she said.

"Aren't I?" he asked. He didn't even know he was feeling it until Payson brought it up. As she had so many times before, she saw what he couldn't. "I left. I wasn't there when you needed me. You were hurting and I ignored it."

"You left to protect me, Sasha. Yes, you were wrong, but you're intentions were good. You are not like him."

"I let down Viola. I cut her out of my life for months."

"You apologized. You made it right."

He couldn't agree with her, but he didn't argue, either. It wouldn't do any good.

They were quiet for a while, Payson just sitting with him and giving him comfort, until she said, "Sasha, I know you don't want to hear this, but did you ever think that maybe the reason your dad didn't come back is because it hurt too much to face the truth?"

He tensed. She was right, he didn't want to hear it. "That doesn't make it right."

"It doesn't. Nothing will ever make what he did right, but you can't live your life hating him. He's human and he makes mistakes."

"I can't just forgive him, Payson. Not after everything he's done."

"I'm not asking you to," she said. "I'm just asking you to consider it. Consider the possibility that he's in pain, too, and maybe eventually you won't hate him, and then eventually you might be able to forgive him. It's a process, and it's not going to happen overnight."

"How do you know?" he asked. "How do you know it works that way?"

"Because that's the way it was for me and Austin. I know it's not the same, it's not even close to the same, but I had to go through that process, too. It took me a long time to forgive him for what happened if St. Louis, and an even longer time to admit that he wasn't the only one who made mistakes. But if I hadn't done that, if I hadn't let myself move through the anger and the pain, I would never have fallen in love with him. I would have missed out on one of the best things in my life because I was hanging onto the past."

It was surreal that the woman he loved was talking about the _other_ man she loved, and yet it made him feel better. He remembered how hurt and bitter she was at the beginning, and how impossible it seemed then that she would ever move past it, but she had. He also knew that the relationship he had with her now was dependent on that change. Loving Austin fixed what was broken in her, and he was the only one who could have done it. Payson was only able to love Sasha because she loved Austin first, but none of it would have happened if she refused to try those first weeks.

"I'll try, Payson. That's all I can promise."

"That's all I'm asking." She paused. "Actually, I have one more thing to ask."

He raised an eyebrow in question and she said, "Make love to me?"

It was a distraction and he knew it, a ploy to pull his mind away from painful thoughts, but he was willing to take the escape. He let himself be drawn into her and let the world close in around them so that it was just him and her together while everything else disappeared. He thought about the rings now hidden away in an inside pocket of his suit and knew that Viola was right; time was too precious to waste.

* * *

><p>AN: Anyone remember if it was Madame Viola or Mistress Viola? I'm not sure, and I guess ABC Family took the full episodes off the site? Or am I just missing them somewhere obvious?

There are lots of pictures on Pinterest. The girls' shoes from the New York trip and all of the pictures from the Chanel/Vogue shoot (I had way too much fun finding those).


	81. Chapter 81

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

A/N: There is no good way to split these next two chapters, so this ends a little awkwardly. Sorry.

* * *

><p>"How did you get from the girl who didn't want to be in a fashion show to this?"<p>

For the third time that week Payson ambushed him as soon as they walked in the door, and Sasha was pretty sure that the only reason she held herself in check the other days was because Austin was with them.

He definitely wasn't complaining, but he hadn't had this much sex since he was in Sydney. She was insatiable and he could barely keep up. There was the part of him that thought, _if I was younger_, but he pushed those thoughts aside. He wasn't sure if there was ever a time that he could have kept up with this, and he had far better control of himself than he did at a younger age, not to mention a lot more skill. Vigor was nothing without experience, and now he was lucky enough to have both. He could give Payson all the pleasure that she wanted—which was a whole hell of a lot.

When Sasha first came to the Rock he had to order her to participate in the fashion show fundraiser because she was embarrassed of her body. Little more than a year after that she posed nude in a magazine. Six months later she posed nude in another magazine whilst seven months pregnant. Now she was unabashedly naked as she laid in the center of their bed and he pleasured her. Apparently one orgasm wasn't enough, because as soon as he pulled out of her she took hold of his hand and placed it where she wanted it. The craziest thing was that they were having a normal conversation while it happened.

"I told you before," she said. "The good girls are always the ones who are hellcats in bed."

"So this has nothing to do with you being pregnant?" he asked. He was doubtful that anyone could sustain this level of randiness on a permanent basis.

Her laugh was low and sultry, and it ended with a moan when he did something that she particularly liked. "Oh no, this has a lot to do with me being pregnant. I'm horny as hell. But a lot of this was there before the hormones kicked in, so I don't think it's going to go away completely."

"God, I hope not."

She laughed again. "So I haven't worn you out yet?"

"Love, you wore me out weeks ago. But if I'm going to die, this is how I want to go out."

"No dying," she insisted. "If you died I wouldn't have anybody to take care of this for me."

"It's a conundrum. If you kill me with sex you'll have nobody to have sex with. I think it's best all around if you just don't kill me."

"Mmm, I think you're right. That's the plan: don't kill you." She was silent for a few minutes while she let her eyes drift shut and just enjoyed what she was feeling, and then she said what was perhaps the most bizarre thing he'd ever heard during sex. "We have to buy new cars."

He was confused enough that he stopped what he was doing, so she pressed her hips against his hand to make him move again. He did, but he was barely aware of what his hand was doing. "Payson, where the bloody hell did that come from?"

"We have to buy new cars, ones that will fit a car seat. I've been putting it off for months, but there's not a lot of time left."

He raised an eyebrow that she couldn't see since her eyes were still closed. "And you thought the appropriate time to bring this up was while my fingers are inside of you?"

"It just popped into my head. I've been meaning to—" she broke off with a cry as an orgasm crashed through her.

He waited until she settled back down to say, "I think I should be offended that you're thinking about cars while I'm doing that to you."

"No, you should just be impressed with my ability to multi-task. Believe me, I was fully enjoying that."

"Then why were you thinking about cars?" he asked.

She was half sheepish and half amused. "I don't think you would understand. Men just don't understand how women's minds work."

"Try me."

"Okay, fine. I was thinking about what you said about the fashion show, which made me think about how I used to fantasize about you doing this back then but I would have been completely embarrassed at the thought of _actually_ doing it, and that led to me thinking about how I blushed when this girl in my math class in high school talked about her boyfriend fingering her in the backseat of his car, and then I thought that I would really like to have sex in the backseat of a car one of these days, and I realized that neither of our cars had a backseat big enough to have sex in, which obviously ended up with me thinking that we didn't have a place to put a car seat and we needed new cars."

. . .

"You're right, I don't understand how a woman's mind works."

"So you never think about anything else during sex, ever?" she asked.

"No. Hell, there are times when I'm not even having sex that I'm not thinking about anything but sex."

She pushed herself up on her elbows. "Okay, fine. Help me up."

He did, but he wasn't sure what he was helping her up for. "Where are you going?"

"Not far," she said. "Just far enough to make you stop thinking about this."

She settled onto her knees by the side of the bed and her words finally made it through his thick skull. She was going to make him stop thinking… "Christ, Payson, didn't we just talk about you not killing me?"

"Do you want me to stop?" she asked. Her face was the picture of innocence.

"When have I _ever_ said no to this?"

The innocence was replaced by a smirk. "That's what I thought. Now get over here, Belov, so I can blow your mind."

"Nice try, but your pun sucks."

"Don't get cocky, yours isn't so great either."

"Payson?"

"Yeah?"

"I can think of a lot better use for your mouth than making stupid puns."

o-O-o

Bill hovered by the showroom door, pretending to check his cell phone. He started out to greet the people walking around a group of A4s, but there was an S5 pulling in and he wanted to see if the driver was here for service or to buy. If they were looking to buy he wanted to take them instead of the other group, because it was a more promising sale. The S5 was a more expensive car, to start with, and someone who already owned an Audi was more likely to buy another one.

The car parked several spots away from Bill, the perfect place for an interception, and a young couple got out. He just needed one good look to read them. After years selling luxury cars he knew all the tale tell signs of a good sale. At first glance the woman didn't look very promising. He could only see her shoulders and above since she was on the other side of the car, but he could tell that she was wearing a vastly oversized sweatshirt. This was not someone he would generally gravitate toward, but she was the one driving the car, and her boyfriend or husband, whichever he was, was exactly the kind of person Bill wanted to deal with. The tall dark haired man had a subtle air of money. His clothes were casual, just jeans and a sweatshirt, but they were expensive, maybe Hugo Boss. The Fendi logo was clear on his tennis shoes, and his watch and sunglasses were definitely designer. He was the perfect mark.

He hurried to meet them before another salesman saw the same potential and tried to steal. Car sales was a cutthroat business, and sometimes it was kill or be killed. Bill made sure to always be the one doing the killing.

The woman stepped around the car as he approached them, and he made a split second evaluation of her. She was pregnant, _very_ pregnant, and the sweatshirt was obviously her boyfriend's (Bill could see now that there were no wedding rings). The sunglasses flipped up on her head were Kobalt, matching the man's, she was wearing diamond studs and a Tiffany necklace, and her boots were Jimmy Choo. She was the perfect mark, too.

"Good afternoon," he called, raising a hand to greet them. "I'm Bill, one of the associates here."

He wasn't sure who was buying, so he shook hands with the woman first. Shaking hands with a man first was risky business, but it was almost always acceptable to start with a woman. If she was buying then she appreciated being addressed first; if the man was buying he liked that his girlfriend was being treated with respect. Occasionally it went wrong, but ninety nine times out of a hundred it worked.

"I'm Payson," she said, "and this is Austin."

"It's nice to meet you both, Payson, Austin." Rule number one: say their names as often as possible. "What can I help you find today?"

"Something child friendly," Payson said with a laugh.

He laughed too. Rule number two: always laugh at their jokes. "So the R8 is out of the question?"

"Oh God, the R8 was never _in_ the question. They tried to give me that car when I first signed and I said hell no."

He had no idea what she was talking about, but he figured that she must be an actress or a model. She did look familiar, but he couldn't place her. He would have to reach into his bag of tricks and pull out the one where he acted like he knew her but was playing it cool so that he didn't make her uncomfortable. He could win an Oscar for some of his performances.

"So if sports cars are out of the question," he said, "what are we looking for? A sedan or a sports utility vehicle?"

"I definitely want an SUV," she said, and then threw a sly look at her boyfriend. "For Austin, we need the most badass sedan you can find."

They were _both_ looking for cars. This was the score of the day.

Austin took her teasing the way most men did—he whined. "Nothing will ever be badass enough to replace the M6, Pay."

"Yeah, well, you can get another one when you have a mid-life crisis. For now you're buying something that we can put a car seat in."

This was going to be a great day. He had two clients, both rich and both looking to buy cars, and they bantered instead of bickering. This was the dream sale.

"Well, Payson, why don't we look around for you first and let Austin mourn the loss of him M6. Since it looks like we'll be looking on opposite ends of the lot, I'll go get a cart to drive us over." Bill went inside and through the back of the offices to grab a golf cart key and drive it back up front. As he turned the corner back toward Austin and Payson he saw a Ford truck pulling into to a front parking spot. He felt sorry for the guy that picked up that sale. People who drove trucks very rarely switched to luxury vehicles, so it was likely a dead end.

He stopped the car in front of his clients, but Payson was facing the other direction. "Mom, Sasha," she called. She signaled over two people—the two people climbing out of that truck. Her family, apparently. Bill hated crowded sales, but if he was selling two cars to this couple then he couldn't complain.

There was a woman who looked to be in her late thirties or early forties and a slightly younger man. The man looked like he was probably Payson's brother, but if the woman was her mother then there was no way the man was her brother. Possibly a cousin, Bill thought.

"Payson, I do not need a new car," the older woman said as they drew closer.

"No, but dad does, so you can get a new one and give him yours. I've been looking for an excuse to buy you a car for a year, and I'm not letting go of this one."

_Three_ cars? This was turning into the best day ever.

"I'm still not happy about this," the blond man said. "I like my truck."

"Sasha, where the hell are we going to put Alex in that thing?" Payson asked. "I can barely get in and out of it now, anyway."

_Four_ cars? This had to be a dream. He'd been doing this for two decades and he'd never sold four cars in one day. One car was a good day. Two cars was a great day. Three cars was lightning in a bottle and only ever happened during a holiday. Four was unheard of. Literally. He'd never once heard of someone selling four cars in one day.

"So you're both looking for cars today, too?" he asked, trying to pull off casual curiosity. He needed to be in control of the sale, and he couldn't do that if he came off as too eager or shocked.

"No, we're being _forced_ to buy cars," the older woman said, sending a glare at her daughter. Most people were excited at the prospect of a new car, but she acted like it was a punishment.

Payson glared right back. "Stop acting like this is charity, mom. After all the money you and dad spent on my training and all the time you spent at the gym, buying you a car is the least I can do."

He wondered how rich this girl was. She was young, barely into her twenties, but she could afford to buy two cars and her earrings alone probably cost more than Bill made in a month. She mentioned time in a gym, so she must be an athlete of some sort, but he still couldn't figure out who she was.

Payson introduced the other two as Kim and Sasha, but she didn't say how Sasha was related to her. He was British, so it wasn't a close relationship, at the very least. They set off as a group to view the choices, and it was a long, drawn out process. That made sense, though, because they were buying four cars and they all wanted different things. Kim was looking for simplicity while Payson's main concern was comfort and safety for her child, and the men were both looking for something as similar to their old cars as possible.

They were looking at an A7 for Austin, which was, as Payson requested, the most badass sedan they had—and it had the added benefit of being one of their more expensive cars—when Austin nudged his girlfriend and cast his eyes off to the side. She looked to where he indicated and groaned. "Did you _have _to point it out, babe? Can't we just pretend it's not there?"

Bill had to look; it was too tempting not to. He turned to follow their gaze and realized that he was a complete idiot. Of course she looked familiar. He saw her face every single day when he drove into work. She was on a billboard, climbing out of the same R8 they joked about earlier. It was no wonder that he didn't recognize her, though, because he rarely looked at the face on that advertisement. His attention was always on the legs. Long, toned legs stepping out of the sports car wearing fuck-me heels and the shortest skirt imaginable. The paper print of that ad cut out parts of the R8 in favor of those legs, because they would sell more cars than a picture of the actual car ever could.

It took every ounce of his talent to keep the surprise off his face. He had to act like he knew who she was the whole time, so he joked, "I don't even know what you're talking about, Payson. He was obviously pointing out a bird flying over us."

"Oh yeah, he loves bird watching. Can't get those binoculars out of his hands most days." It was dripping with sarcasm, but Austin didn't so much as flinch.

Bill spent the rest of their time together trying to remember everything he could about the girl. Now that he thought about it, he did hear once that the model for the ads was from the area, but it never occurred to him that he might meet her, much less be selling her a car. How did that work, selling her a car? Was Audi actually paying for it, or was she buying it herself? She said that they tried to give her an R8 when she first signed, so presumably they gave her the S5 in its place. Were they giving her this one, too?

Payson. Now that he had a context, he thought her name might be Payson Keeler, and that she was some big time athlete who was headed for the Olympics when she came on board with Audi. She must have done well there or she wouldn't still be in all the advertisements, but the Olympics weren't that long ago and she looked like she was late in her pregnancy, so how did that work?

It was the end of a long day when they went inside to start signing paperwork, and he dropped the standard "I have to okay this with my manager" line as an excuse to get away. Most times he really did have to run the deals by his manager, which was standard practice, but he didn't for this one. They were paying full MSRP and there was no "deal" to okay. For someone as rich as these people apparently were, a few thousand dollars wasn't worth haggling over.

One of the other salesmen was in the office already, having just closed a deal, so Bill shut the door behind him and asked, "What do either of you know about the woman in the billboard ads?"

Kyle, the man who just signed off his sale, answered, "She's hot. That all I really care to know."

"Well, if you want a shot with her, this is your chance. She's sitting in my office. But her boyfriend is with her and she's hugely pregnant, so I'm not sure that you'll get anywhere."

David, the manager and a personal friend of Bill's, said, "Is this a joke that I'm not understanding, Bill? Are you selling a car to some girl who looks like her or something?"

Bill grinned. "No, I'm selling a car to the real her. Four cars, actually. Her, the boyfriend Austin, and two family members. I just don't remember much about her. Google her, David. Payson Keeler."

He could tell that his friend was humoring him, and Kyle was planning Bill's involuntary commitment. Kyle was the second best seller at the dealership, and he was a shark in the water. He wanted that top spot and Bill was in the way.

David typed on his computer and then stared at the screen. "Is this a prank?"

"I swear on my life that I am not joking."

Kyle circled around to look over David's shoulder and said, "Prove it. Give us details."

"Fine," Bill agreed. Kyle was going to kick himself when he realized that he missed out on the sale of the year. "Payson—short blonde hair, pregnant, her jewelry costs more than we would make if we sold five R8s. Austin—tall, dark hair, bleeds money, drives an M6. The mom is Kim, and the other guy is Sasha. Tall, British, looks like Payson. The baby is a boy named Alex. Is that enough details?"

Kyle's jaw was on the floor. David ignored him and said, "If you really don't remember much, get back here and take a look at this. It's her fansite."

Bill joined the other two behind the desk and read over David's shoulder. She was a gymnast, it said, and the greatest one in history. The bio had a giant list of records she broke and medals she won, and then information about the pregnancy and some kind of blood disease that she had. There was a mention of nude magazine spreads and a hyperlink, so of course David clicked on it. The first set of pictures was beyond hot—she was doing gymnastics naked—but the second set was surprising. She was pregnant. And naked. Pregnant and naked. Bill's wife definitely did not look like that when she was pregnant.

They scrolled through a few more areas of the site and found other information about her, like the reason she was wearing such expensive jewelry: Tiffany's paid her to wear it. Apparently she also had a shoe fetish, which explained the Jimmy Choos, and she was known as a fashion icon. It was hard to reconcile the woman in those designer dresses to the woman sitting in his office wearing a sweatshirt that was four or five sizes too big.

"Wait, click on that," he said, pointing to a picture of her at the Olympics. "That's the other guy, Sasha."

"Not a family member," Kyle said. He tried to act like he knew what he was talking about rather than reading it off the computer. "He's her coach. She's buying her coach a car?"

"No, she's buying her mom a car. The men are buying their own. It is a little weird that he needs a new car because she's pregnant, but I wasn't clear on why he needed one even when I thought they were related. He must be going to babysit a lot." He straightened up from where he was bending in front of the computer. "I have to get back, though. I have a sale to finish. Kyle, try not to be too obvious when you walk past my office to ogle them."

The manager's office was the only place to go for real privacy, because the sales associates all had glass windows surrounding their offices and it was easy to see inside them. Bill didn't doubt that he was going to get a few other salesmen passing by his window to catch a glimpse of Payson. It wasn't every day that a woman you see on a billboard outside your office shows up in person.

As the group went through the process of signing the paperwork and sorting through all the final details, Bill did notice that the hallway seemed to be particularly busy, but the buyers' backs were always to the window so they didn't see any of this. Bill himself spent a considerable amount of the time calculating his commission. He had a handy skill of doing mental math while he talked to people. With all four cars and a few extras they ordered, Bill would earn just over four thousand dollars, and he was going to get some bonuses for this.

When all the papers were signed and Kim was given the key to her car—the other three were special ordered—he walked them to their cars. Before Payson climbed back into her S5 she asked, "Do you have a card?"

"Of course," he said. He pulled one out of his pocket and handed it to her. He hoped that this meant she was going to refer him to her friends.

"Thanks. You've been really great today. I have a conference call with the chief marketing officer next week and I'll mention your name."

For the first time in many, many years, Bill was speechless. He couldn't manage to get out a reply or even say goodbye before they were in their cars and driving away. He sold four cars today, made thousands in commission and who knows how much more in bonuses, and she was going to mention his name to the CMO. This was the best day of his life. Besides the day he got married and when his kids were born, of course, but really… this was the best day of his life.

o-O-o

Payson was fidgeting. She fidgeted most nights, but this was worse than normal.

"What's the matter, love?" he mumbled. Half of him was awake and talking to Payson, and the other half was asleep. He wanted his whole self to be asleep, but Payson would be in a strop the next morning if he ignored her.

More fidgeting and then, "This isn't our bed."

"Of course it isn't our bed. We're in a bloody hotel." He knew it was the wrong thing to say before the words were out of his mouth, but it was too late to stop them.

"I know we're in a bloody hotel, Sasha, but there's a bloody seven pound person living inside of me and the bed is uncomfortable. So instead of making stupid comments why don't you do something to help?"

There was nothing that he could do that would make her comfortable, but he didn't bother to say that. Payson was, unfortunately, very used to pain and discomfort, so she wasn't as bothered by some of the less than fun aspects of pregnancy as other women might be. She said once that pregnancy was a comfort cruise compared to having a fractured spine and wearing evil in the form of a back brace, but there was one major exception to that rule. She was cranky at night.

During the day she had something to think about other than being uncomfortable, but at night there was nothing to distract her. She wanted to sleep and couldn't, and she made sure that Sasha couldn't either. It was a trade out, though, because if he was sympathetic and stayed awake with her she wanted to have sex the next morning. If he ignored her, she still wanted to have sex the next morning, but she left him out of it. She kicked him out of the bedroom and took care of herself, and a single look managed to tell him that there would be hell to pay if he took care of himself in the same way.

"Do you want me to rub your back?" he asked. It wouldn't make her comfortable, but it might at least help, and it would certainly help get him back into her good graces.

She growled, a clear sign that a back rub was not good enough but she would take it anyway. She shifted, with much difficulty, so that she was sitting upright, and he moved them both so that he was leaning against the headboard and she was sitting between his legs. He knew from experience that she would end up falling asleep against his chest, which she eventually did. He went back to sleep as soon as she nodded off, but it was little more than an hour before she was awake again and the whole process started over. The back and forth happened every night. The only part that varied was how much Sasha got into trouble before it all played out.

Around six o' clock she woke up for good, already in a better mood. She was a morning person, so her endorphins kicked in when the sun came up no matter how little sleep she got. Luckily he was a morning person, too, because their schedule tended to be either wake up, have sex, eat breakfast or wake up, eat breakfast, have sex. He had no complaints either way.

Since they were in a hotel, the sex came first this morning. Even now, when she was nearly nine months pregnant, he got so caught up in her that he lost all sense of reason, but he forced his head clear long enough to say, "Try to remember that your parents and Becca are in the next room over. I don't think I would ever be able to look them in the eyes again if they heard us."

Her answer was to kiss him, which didn't make him confident that she really understood what he said, but he was too far gone to make any point of it. She was a little quieter than usual, so she must have been listening, but she couldn't stop the cry that escaped her lips when she came. Sasha hoped that the walls were really think, the Keelers were still asleep, or, best of all, both.

Afterward, they laid together talking, and the conversation inevitably turned to the reason that they were in a hotel in Denver instead of in their own home. "This is a big weekend for you."

"It's a bigger weekend for Jess and Becca," Payson said. She would never admit it, but she was proud of what she accomplished with her soon-to-be elite gymnasts. She was just more proud of what they accomplished.

Tomorrow was their elite qualifier. They trained in Denver yesterday and would stay there for the next three days, living a life of eat, sleep, train. It was cheating a little bit, practicing at Denver Elite a couple of days before they had to compete there, but elite qualifiers tended to be about those kind of cheats and nobody minded. Any gym that had girls attempting qualification petitioned to have the competition at their gym so that they would have the advantage of being familiar with the equipment, which is why they came to Denver early. The more comfortable the girls were in the gym, the better they would do.

They were cheating a lot, really. Jess and Becca were the only girls allowed to train at DE early, which Marty explained away as the Rock having asked first. He couldn't let his gym be flooded with other gymnasts to steal the equipment from his own, so he had to turn down everybody else. Choosing the gym hadn't been quite fair, either, because the NGO had a lot of pressure put on them to pick Denver Elite. DE and the Rock were the only two gyms that had girls compete in the Olympics, so they had a lot of pull with the organization, and then Beth and Andy's gyms, Chow's and Boston Elite, joined in the campaign in exchange for help getting one of the other qualifiers. It was essentially one big conspiracy, but the original reason had nothing to do with the girls getting an advantage. They fought so hard for the competition to be at Denver Elite because Payson was thirty eight weeks pregnant, and their hospital was less than an hour away if she happened to go into labor. Sasha wasn't happy about the hour away part, but Payson assured him that labor would take many, many hours so they would have plenty of time to get there.

The bad part of the arrangement was that Austin wasn't there and that bothered Payson. She didn't like being apart from Austin, especially when she might go into labor at any minute, but Marty refused to let him train at DE for those days. If he was going to turn away other qualifying gymnasts he couldn't justify letting Austin train there. Austin tried to come and just not train, but Payson said no. The most she would let him do was drive down in the evenings after practice. As much as she wanted him there, she wouldn't let him lose training time. He would be losing enough, she said, when she gave birth and those first few weeks after. She didn't complain about him withdrawing from the American Cup, at least. The press release he put out said that he could not in good conscious leave Boulder when Payson was in her last month of pregnancy. In reality she was due the day after the Cup, so he _really_ couldn't leave.

The day was going to be a typical pre-competition day, which meant busy for Sasha and Payson and not busy for Becca and Jess. The gymnasts had to practice and relax. Payson and Sasha had to coach the girls, fill out hundreds of pieces of paperwork, meet with the NGO officials, and fend off questions from every coach who came into the lobby to register. The only non-stressful part of the day was breakfast, but, stress or no stress, it was uncomfortable. Becca's blush when they met up downstairs was all that Sasha needed to verify that Payson was not quiet enough when they made love that morning. Kim and Mark didn't bat and eyelash, so they were either great at pushing things out of their mind or were asleep when it happened. Payson handled the situation by pulling Becca aside to talk before they ate.

Carmen Torres wasn't even fazed that Payson and Sasha were sharing a hotel room. They weren't being open about their relationship, and most people still thought that Payson and Austin we together, but Carmen acted like she'd known all along. She rolled with the news of the pregnancy as well, so maybe she was just great at not judging people.

Payson took a nap when they got back from the gym and didn't wake up until dinner, and then the girls were sent to bed soon after they ate, so the evening was filled with sleeping. Once Jess and Becca were in bed, though, the adults sat talking for hours. The Keelers reminisced about Payson's elite qualification at the tender age of eleven, and then Kim and Carmen told stories from when they were pregnant, some sweet and some hilarious. Carmen had them all rolling when she told them about the time she was convinced that her husband had been killed or kidnapped because he was thirty minutes late from work. It turned out that there was a wreck on the highway and he got stuck behind it, but this was before the age of cell phones and he couldn't call. She said that as soon as she got over the fear she was furious at him for making her worry, even though there was nothing he could do to control it. Sasha was glad that Payson's pregnancy hormones mostly centered around sex, so he didn't have to deal with any of the craziness. Unless, of course, her having sex with Austin in their kitchen could be considered crazy, which it probably could.

The second night in the hotel was much the same as the first, with the major exception of them making love in the middle of the night because she thought it might make her sleep better. It actually worked, and she got nearly two hours of uninterrupted sleep. Sasha suspected that sex late at night was going to become a lot more common in the next couple of weeks until the baby was born. He was going to enjoy it while he could, because sex two or three times every day would probably never happen again.

She was relaxed the next day, either because of the multiple orgasms she had over the course of the night and morning or because her famous competitive calm was setting in. She was calm and as a result so were Jess and Becca. This part of the qualification would be easy as long as they kept their cool. They had to get through the compulsories to qualify as elites, but neither of them would have a problem with that. Their skill level was far above the compulsory requirements. It was the optional the next day that were important for these two. The optional qualified them to the U.S. Classic in July, and it was the place where they could make a splash.

Their optionals were ballsy, more like a combination of Emily, Lauren, and Kelly than anything Payson did. Payson's routines were about grace and beauty, yes, but they were also pointedly sensual, and that was not something that anyone as young as Becca and Jess should be trying to emulate. Jess was dramatic like Emily, Becca had Kelly's flare, and they both had Lauren's daring big tricks, but neither girl was a copy of the London gymnasts. They made their routines their own.

There were a lot of things that Sasha expected when they stepped foot in the gym. He expected their girls to do well; he expected to be asked hundreds of nosy questions; he expected Kevin to be there because he had gymnasts of his own competing; he expected Austin to skip practice and drive down, as well as some of the other Rock gymnasts; he half expected Payson to go into labor in the middle of the competition. He did not expect to see the entire London team, with the exception of Max, sitting in the stands.

Payson moved to hug them all. "What are you guys doing here?" she asked. "You're supposed to be in school."

"Please," Lauren scoffed. "Like we would ever miss something this important to you. Plus, we have to celebrate Kelly's birthday together since the doctor wouldn't let you fly out to California last week."

Payson was a mess that weekend because of her mixed feelings about Kelly's birthday. On the one hand, she really wanted to be there for Kelly, but on the other she was afraid to go out of state so close to her due date, and she had responsibilities in Colorado with the girls' qualifications coming up. That was one of the few time that her hormones got out of control and she sat down and cried out of frustration, so Sasha was glad that they would get to celebrate together after all.

Jake and Steven greeted her like the big brothers they were turning into for her, and then Payson and Austin hugged for several minutes while they whispered to each other—it took Sasha a few weeks to get used to the weird dynamic they were bound to live with, but he wasn't bothered by the show of affection anymore. She didn't spend long with the group, though, because she had to get Becca and Jess ready to start, but Sasha stayed back and sat with them, Mark and Kim, and Carmen.

"Aren't you going to be on the floor with them?" Nicky asked.

"No. I'm strictly an assistant coach this weekend. They're Payson's gymnasts, not mine."

Kelly frowned. "So is this your way of pushing Payson out of the nest to make her fly?"

Austin answered for him. "No way. Payson never needed to be pushed out. She jumped out of the nest herself a long time ago. This is her showing everybody else how high Jess and Becca can fly."

* * *

><p>AN: Pictures of the cars and Payson's shoes/jewelry on pinterest.

Writing this chapter was characterized by needless frustration because I couldn't fit in small details that I wanted, but then I said to hell with it and let it be. I'll tell them to you now:

The reason that Payson and Austin drove to the car dealership together was because Payson was blatantly throwing Sasha under the bus. There was a board member there wanting to talk about the Rock's budget, so Payson ran away with Austin and texted Sasha to bring her mom over to the car dealership when he was done. The reason that they are staying in a hotel in Denver instead of driving back and forth is because Sasha likes short commutes, as he was kind enough to point out in episode 3 ;) Their hotel is like 5 minutes from DE.


	82. Chapter 82

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

A/N: Man, posting chapters every other day is a lot harder than I remember. I can't seem to make that happen anymore :(

* * *

><p>There were only a few dozen gyms in the U.S. that housed elite gymnasts. Of those, there were a select few that had girls who qualified for Nationals. Fewer still had girls on the National team. Right now the Rock had three junior elite girls and four seniors, none of who were National team material, but they were about to get two more juniors, and both of them would end up on the team this year. The post-Olympic year was notorious for being a low point for gyms because so many elites retired, but the Rock was coming back solid.<p>

The gym was about to become a lot more selective. Payson explained the changes to Lauren one night over the phone, and they made a lot of sense. The chances of four girls from one gym ever making it to the Olympics again were slim to none, so they decided to impose a limit of three Olympic track girls for each quadrennial. They would take girls looking to go elite as a boost to college recruitment, but anyone wanting to go to the Olympics had a much more rigorous process to go through. Basically, there were three ways to become one of the Rock's Olympic hopefuls: come up in house through the J.O. program, put in an application that would be closely reviewed and required a video audition, an in person audition, and an interview, or be personally invited by Sasha and Payson. Jess was the only Olympic-bound girl in the gym right now, so parents were clamoring to get their kids in those other two spots.

Sasha had explained the process so many times that he was likely to explode on the next parent who asked, so Lauren thought it best to switch places and put him in the middle of their group. It would be harder for people to get to him that way, and Lauren had no problem being the one to warn off people by pointing out that they were interrupting a very important competition.

Now that the threat of Sasha beating someone to death with their own limbs was over, Lauren was free to make observations. Observation number one: Jess and Becca were rocking the compulsories. They were soaring past the rest of the field and placing a big neon sign on the Rock that said it was the place to train. At the rate Becca was progressing she might even make a Worlds team in a few years.

Observation number two: Payson was happier than Lauren had ever seen her before. Her life was crazy and complicated, but she was making it work for her. She loved coaching, loved her baby, loved their bizarre extended family, and loved both the men in her life. Things between Austin and Payson were better than any of them could have hoped seven months ago.

Observation number three: Payson was having sex. It was a gift that Lauren had, a sixth sense. She could always tell when someone was having sex, and Payson was. Sasha was having sex, too, so the obvious conclusion was that they were having sex with each other, and Lauren was a little annoyed that she had to use her special powers to figure this out. Payson should have told her. She understood why she didn't, because a change like that took time to process, but it still stung. Not the Payson not telling part, but the Lauren not being here part, because if she had been in Boulder Payson would have talked to her about it before now. She loved Stanford and she loved Jake, but she missed her family and friends. She missed the Rock.

Jess and Becca took the top two spots in the competition as expected, with their scores way over the required 35. Payson placed the same stress on execution that Sasha did, so there just weren't many deductions to take from them, especially for Jess. She was as close to perfect as you can get.

The girls were bombarded with hugs when they came off the floor, and Lauren could only imagine how surreal it was for them. Pass your elite compulsories, get hugged by eleven Olympic gold medalists. Of course, when you're coached by two of those gold medalists, had been coached by another one before that, and spent large amounts of time around five more it probably skewed your concept of normal.

Lauren waited until all the media was gone before she shot a pleading look at Marty. He heaved out a long-suffering sigh and said, "Fine, go. Just don't hurt yourself."

"Thank you!" She ran to the beam and left her boots and socks at the side of the mat. It wasn't the Rock, but it was in Colorado and that was close enough right now. She chalked her hands and feet and pressed up into a handstand and then collapsed gracefully back to the beam. That's what it looked like, at least, but in reality it was a very controlled side roll down. She did some work close to the beam and then pushed back up with a Valdez, one of Payson's signature moves.

Payson's voice carried across the gym. "I do that better than you."

"Not right now you don't," Lauren teased back. Payson was right, of course. She did do the Valdez better than Lauren. She did the Valdez better than anybody ever had. It got overlooked a lot because she had so many harder moves that she did just as well, but everybody could appreciate the beauty of it.

Payson wandered over to the beam. "Have you tried my flic flac full? I bet you could do it better than I do."

Lauren was upside down doing a tic toc at the time so she waited until she was upright before she answered. She shook her head. "I haven't, but since I'm just playing right now anyway, let's do it. You can teach me, Coach Keeler."

She expected Payson to protest trying the move out on the high beam, but she didn't. It was a testament to how much she trusted Lauren's ability. "Do the half first," she said. "So I can get a feel for where you body is."

Lauren did it and then did a walkover out of the handstand, and Payson said, "Okay, you go higher and wider than I do, with a lot more power. You're going to have to hold back on some of that power or you'll go straight over backwards, and you'll need to engage your core muscles sooner since you have so much more momentum to stop. Try the full, but remember that you're not doubling your power. About half way in between this and double, that should do it."

"Okay, but you need to stand back. If I blow this I don't want to hit you."

Payson stepped back, all too aware of the danger to the baby if Lauren accidentally kicked her, and it wasn't all that unlikely. They'd all kicked Sasha a time or two working on a new skill. Lauren steadied herself, took a deep breath, and threw herself into the skill.

Payson wasn't kidding about needing to hold back on the power. She had way too much going back and would have turned it into a Rufolva if she hadn't over rotated it, too. It ended up being closer to a one and a quarter than a full, so the only thing she could do to save it was to turn it into a hip circle around the beam.

When Lauren got control again and dropped off the beam, Payson was staring at her in shock. "Okay, first," she said, "I can't believe you just saved that, and second, can I steal it?"

She couldn't help but laugh. "Seriously? You want to steal something that I did by accident to keep myself from falling off the beam?"

"Hell yes I want to steal it. If you could have just seen that, it was amazing."

Lauren was still laughing, but she managed to say, "Sure. I'm not competing anymore, so feel free to use that however you want."

"Do you think you could do it again?" Payson asked.

"I don't know, probably. Now that I know what it feels like I can probably repeat it."

Payson turned around and called, "Hey Jess, come here. I've got a new move for you to put in your beam routine."

Lauren did it again, and it was just as messy as the first time but a lot less surprising. When she landed back on the mats she heard Jess say, "Awesome. Can I try it now?"

"No." Sasha and Payson said it at the same time, and then Payson continued, "You can try it back at the Rock, in the pit, after you've worked your way up to the skill, and _definitely_ after you've finished this qualifier."

"Lauren just did it and she wasn't in the pit," Jess whined.

"Lauren is the best beamer in the world. Don't get a big head and start comparing yourself to her."

The statement was lighthearted rather than mean, but there was no mistaking that it was a chastisement. They had all at one point been too confident in themselves and it never ended well, so they needed to nip it in bud with Jess. She had a real shot at being the first twelve year old to medal at Nationals since Payson, but getting cocky would kill that dream before it even started.

Jess had the good sense to look contrite. "Sorry, Coach."

Kaylie ruined the apology with a stifled laugh, which drew everybody's attention. "Sorry," she said. "That's still weird to me, you being called Coach."

"Okay, enough of this," Kelly said. "Let's go celebrate, and then we're putting the kids to bed and celebrating my birthday."

Kelly was exaggerating, because it was just barely one in the afternoon, but they did go celebrate with a group lunch. Again Lauren thought about how strange it must be for the younger girls to celebrate their compulsory wins with the entire 2012 team. They made sure to keep it about the girls, too. There was a fair amount of back and forth between the team members, but the main attention was on Becca and Jess, and mostly they talked about their optional routines for the next day. Payson had a great understanding of what worked for each girl and what didn't, so she was able to choreograph routines for them that had high start values and great execution. Lauren never understood the importance of great choreography until Sasha came to the Rock and increased their D-scores by nothing but re-choreographing their routines. When he trained them with harder skills, too, their difficulty values went through the roof.

After lunch the girls went back to the gym for a short practice session to get ready for the next day. They looked good, and they were going to blow the competition out of the water, but after the practice and dinner they really were grounded to their rooms for the night. Lauren loved every bit of her competitive career, but being restricted to your hotel room for the entire evening every time you competed was not something she missed.

After the kids were in bed, Payson demonstrated exactly why she was known as a fashion icon. They were going to a club for Kelly's birthday, and Payson didn't have anything remotely resembling club clothes with her. She was eight and a half months pregnant and here for work, so she had no reason to bring anything but regular clothes, but when she met them back in the lobby she looked like a rockstar. Her leggings, sweater, and boots were all casual, but paired together they made a club-worthy outfit.

When they got to the club there was a huge line waiting to get in, but Payson ignored it and walked to the front. Lauren wasn't really sure when Payson became confident enough that she would line jump at a club, but they got in, so it definitely wasn't false confidence. All she did was lean close to the bouncer so he could hear her over the music, say "Payson Keeler," and point to a billboard towering over the skyline that showed her in one of the new Chanel ads. He let them all in without even checking their IDs.

She also managed to get them a VIP table up in the balcony with wait service so they didn't have to stand in line at the bar. They all ordered drinks—again, nobody checked their IDs, one of the perks of being famous—and Lauren waited until they were all holding glasses and the waiter was gone before she asked, "So, how long have you been screwing Sasha?"

Steven choked on his drink and Payson said, "Why do you have to say it like that, Lo? Why can't you just ask how long we've been together, or even how long we've been sleeping together? Why do you have to say screwing?"

"I call it like I see it," Lauren said. Ava and Nicky were laughing, Steven was still coughing, and the rest of the group was staring in shock, but Austin sat with his arm slung around Payson like nobody said anything unusual. They had such a weird relationship. "You've been acting like a married couple ever since you moved in with him and you've been sleeping in the same bed since London, but the sex part is new. So how long?"

"Okay, fine," Payson conceded. "Since January."

"Wait," Kaylie said, "You really are sleeping with Sasha? _Oh my God_. Is he good in bed?"

Austin held a hand up to stop the conversation. "Whoa, whoa, whoa. You are not having this conversation in front of me. If you want to know details you can wait until I'm not around to get them."

"Yeah, it's only fair," Emily said. There was a look in her eyes that Lauren was just beginning to recognize that said she was being mischievous. "After all, we waited until Austin wasn't around to get all the details about him."

This time it was Austin's turn to choke. "I don't want to know that, either. I want to keep pretending that none of you know anything about my sex life."

"If you don't want other people to know about your sex life then maybe you shouldn't have had sex on the kitchen table where anyone could walk in on you," Nicky said.

"Yeah, well maybe you shouldn't walk around the house with your iPod blaring so loud that you can't hear anything."

"Maybe I wouldn't have had my music on so loud if I didn't have to drown out the constant sounds of you two having sex."

"Okay," Payson yelled over the boys' banter. She lowered her voice when they stopped talking. "We are done talking about sex. This whole conversation is over."

"Hey Steve?" Jake said.

"Yeah Jake?"

"How did we ever get involved with these maniacs?"

"I have nooo flippin' clue."

o-O-o

Sasha was bursting with pride for Payson and for Jess and Becca. The two girls were the make it or break it pair for Payson as a coach, and there was not a doubt in anybody's mind now that she had made it. There were several established junior elites competing in the optionals as their bid to the U.S. Classic, but Jess and Becca were standing on the top two spots of the podium. The Classic would be harder, because they would be competing against members of the 2012 junior National team, but he expected them both to be in the top ten. The scores they put up today were as high as the current team members' were. He thought about the parents who pulled their kids out when Payson told them she was pregnant, and he bet that they regretted it now. Payson was going to take Jess to the Olympics, and probably Becca to Worlds.

The aftereffects were huge. The media was looking to speak with the girls, with Payson, with him, with the London team, with the Keelers and Carmen Torres. Suddenly Jess and Becca had huge expectations going into the Classic, and it would fall to Payson to keep them calm through it. Once they managed to shake the media, there were pictures to take. Official pictures for the USA Gymnastics website, pictures for their families, pictures with the little girls who came to see the girls they wanted to be someday. Sasha was blind from the camera flashes. Then they had to talk to the NGO, who were suddenly feeling a lot friendlier toward Payson after having shunned her for leaving them out of her Pierre de Coubertine speech. Sasha couldn't wait to get the hell out of there.

There was no big celebration today. The girls were overwhelmed enough as it was, so the adults let them go back to the Torres's room by themselves and order room service and movies to celebrate together. When they rest of them finished lunch, Carmen went up to check on them and they were both asleep.

The girls were taking Payson somewhere, but she came back to their room to change first. When the door was closed and locked, she sank into Sasha's arms.

"I'm so proud of them," she said. She rested her head on his shoulder and looked up at him. "Is this how you always felt with us?"

"It is, and I still feel that way. I'm proud of you, Payson. You've done an amazing job."

"You said once, a long time ago, that coaching might be my calling. Back then I thought you were full of it," she paused while they both chuckled, "but I think you were right. This feels like what I'm supposed to be doing."

"It is what you're supposed to be doing. It's what I'm supposed to doing, too, but it took you girls to make me remember that."

She reached up to stroke his cheek. "You were so unhappy back then. It took me months to realize it, and only then it was because I could look back and see how much you had changed. Coaching made you happy again."

"Coaching and you. You played a huge role in that."

"I love you, Sasha." She lifted her lips to his for a kiss. She pulled away and he chased her lips, and they got caught up in another kiss.

She pulled away with a sigh. "I really wish I didn't have to go."

"Me too, but I'll still be here when you get back. You're not sleeping tonight, love, and it won't be because you're uncomfortable."

"Promise?"

"Definitely promise."

She should have changed clothes, but she stayed leaning against him for a few minutes while they relished just being together. Finally he asked, "Payson? Does it concern you that all we seem to do is have sex?"

She laughed into his chest and mumbled, "We're in the honeymoon phase. Besides, we have to enjoy it now because once Alex comes it's all going to change."

He'd thought the same thing before, about enjoying it while they could, but he had started to worry about the fact that they talked a lot less because they were always making love. He was glad that Payson thought that this was normal.

"Good, then we're definitely going to take advantage of these next few weeks. Go be with your friends, and when you come back I'm not going to let you go for the rest of the night."

o-O-o

They told Payson that they had a surprise for her, but they didn't give her any hints. It was a small miracle that they were able to pull it off without her finding out, though. Well, a small miracle and a really great concierge. Two years ago Emily's only concept of a concierge was the one on Pretty Woman, but now she appreciated just how important they were. The right concierge could do anything, including sneaking in a bunch of well know people carrying baby gifts without anybody noticing.

It was Emily's idea. Henrietta Dashelet threw a baby shower for Payson a few weeks ago, but it was all friends of the Keelers and moms from the gym. The girls were invited, of course, but Kaylie and Beth were the only ones who could go because the rest of them were in school. They had all planned to be in Denver for the qualifiers, though, so it seemed like the perfect time to celebrate Alex's impending arrival. They sent out invitations to all of their friends on the elite circuit and gathered them together in Denver. To keep it from Payson, they didn't tell a single person at the Rock except for Austin. They had to tell Austin, because Kaylie, Lauren, and Kelly had money, but not Payson and Austin kind of money, and plane tickets for so many people weren't cheap. The ones who could afford it, like Shawn and Nastia, paid for their own, but not everybody had endorsements, so the girls made sure that money didn't keep anyone from coming.

Payson was late meeting them, but when she did knock on the door of Kaylie and Lauren's room, Lauren opened it and said, "Did you and Sasha just have sex?"

"Actually, no," Payson said, brushing past her friend and into the room, "but we would have if I wasn't meeting you guys."

"Okay, I know I joked about it last night," Emily said, "but I really don't want to know these things about Sasha. It's one thing when it's Austin, but Sasha's kind of like a dad to me, so I don't want to know this."

"Well I do," Kelly said, sitting up from where she was laying on Kaylie's bed. "You never answered Kaylie's question last night. Is he good in bed?"

"It's _Sasha_," Payson said. As much as Emily didn't want to think about it, she knew what Payson meant. There was no way that Sasha Belov could not be good in bed.

"You do know that it's monumentally unfair that you got two guys who are sex gods, right?" Kelly said.

Payson moved to sit beside her. "Don't go getting too jealous there," she said, "because my first time was about as bad as you can possibly get. I was drunk, doped up, an emotional mess, and it hurt like hell. I would give up the great sex now in a heartbeat if I could make that one time better."

"Wait, what do you mean you were doped up?" Kaylie asked, expressing Emily's thoughts perfectly. She knew the rest of that story, but Payson had never said anything about drugs before.

Payson flinched. "God, why can't I learn to keep my damn mouth shut? I'm sorry that I let that slip, guys, but I really don't want to talk about it. It's too painful."

Emily didn't want to make Payson re-live something that was so hard for her, but this was too concerning to let it go. "Austin gave you drugs?" She didn't want to believe that about her friend.

"No." Payson's face was a mask of pain and regret, and it made Emily want to take the question back. "Austin gave me alcohol. The drugs were mine."

"I don't believe it," Kelly said. Not an expression of doubt, but one of shock. "I don't believe you would ever use drugs."

"Look, I can't do this. If you want to know the story then ask Austin or Sasha, but I can't talk about it. It hurts too much. I didn't use anything illegal. That's all you need to know."

Lauren, who had her fair share of mistakes that she didn't want to talk about, said, "Okay, so we're not talking about that. Go back to the happy topic—great sex with Sasha."

Payson rolled with the subject change better than Emily could have. She thought that it might be a skill developed out of necessity, because Lauren and Kelly had it too. Emily had her issues, but nothing like those three girls had experienced, so maybe they were forced to look past the bad stuff in order to survive.

They sat together on the bed and talked while the hotel staff got everything ready downstairs. Emily tried to ignore the stuff about Sasha, but at some point she got drawn in. She had been sleeping with Damon longer than Payson had been with Sasha or Austin, but Payson was definitely more experienced.

Emily was a little dazed by the conversation, so she wasn't sure what led to Kaylie asking Kelly, "So it was bad with Nicky?"

"No, that's not what I meant. In some ways it was wonderful, because we loved each other, but it was… I don't know, awkward maybe? It was the first time for both of us, so neither of us knew what we were doing, and I was really embarrassed because he'd never seen me naked before so it was hard to get into it. He was really great, trying to make me comfortable, but I never did get over it. Every time it was like, oh my God, I'm naked, and he's touching me, and we're having sex, and I can't believe I'm doing this."

"I get that," Lauren said. "With Carter it was pretty much I laid there, he did his thing, and then we were done. It had nothing to do with me. So with Jake, I kept freaking out because he made it all about me and I didn't know how to handle that. I couldn't shut my mind off. He waited for months until I was ready."

"You didn't have that with Austin?" Kaylie asked. Emily couldn't imagine how hard it must be for Kaylie to talk to Payson about having sex with Austin. "Even after how bad everything was the first time, you never freaked out after that?"

"Honestly, I was numb. I had just stopped feeling things after Nationals, and the baby was starting to wake things up and I couldn't take it. The sex was all physical for me, a way to shut out everything else. The emotions didn't come until I got sick."

Emily looked away from Payson because she couldn't take the pain in her friend's eyes, and she happened to see the clock. "Uh, guys, can I interrupt this extremely uncomfortable conversation to point out that there was a reason we got together in the first place?"

Kelly looked at the clock, too, and said, "Oh, shit. It's totally time for us to be there."

"Where is there?" Payson asked.

Kaylie pulled on Payson's hand get her off the bed. "Come with us and we'll show you."

"Okay, but you're going to have to give me a little more time to get up. I can't just hop up like the rest of you."

It wasn't like she took a long time to stand up, but she was right. She couldn't jump off the bed like she used to, so it took her a few seconds to get up.

They led her downstairs and into a meeting room off the lobby, and Payson stopped dead at the sight of all her friends sitting in a room filled with presents and circus-themed decorations. The only words she could manage were, "Oh my God."

They were all there: their entire National team and a dozen or so other girls from their circuit, the girls from Beijing, Carly Patterson.

Carly, who had mentored Payson for years, was the first one to come over and give her a hug. "Congratulations, little sis. I'm so happy for you."

Payson was stuck on "oh my God." She hugged Carly back out of instinct, but she didn't really process what was happening until she hugged several other people. "I can't believe you guys are all here."

Alicia came to hug her and said, "Of course we're here, Pay. You're our friend. We wouldn't miss this for the world."

Payson started to cry and Alicia hugged her tighter, prompting Payson to say, "I'm fine, I swear. I don't usually do the pregnancy hormones thing, but a lot has happened this weekend. Thank you all so much."

She continued to cry as she hugged everybody else, and then Emily led her to the spot of honor in a rocking chair. "The chair's not a gift," she clarified. "We just thought it was appropriate so the concierge found us one."

Everybody sat around her on couches and chairs that had been brought in to accommodate them, though a few people sat on the floor out of pure habit. As gymnasts they spent a lot of time on the floor and were used to it.

They were joking that the shower Henrietta threw was the "grown up" baby shower and this was the teenage one, but it was more or less accurate. They ranged from sixteen to twenty four, and not a single one of them had children of their own. Payson bought all the big stuff herself—a highchair, a stroller, car seats for multiple cars, furniture—and the moms at the last shower made a point to give her things that they found useful when their children were babies, but this was a purely fluff baby shower. They had no idea what kind of stuff Payson needed, so they stuck with the cute stuff.

"Just a warning," Lauren said, "Since there's not a real adult in sight, we're going to make you play stupid baby shower games."

Payson laughed. "We played some of those at the other shower, too. I'm assuming that you're not going to give me cards with helpful hints for motherhood, though."

They did play a lot of games. There were the normal ones, like the clothes pin game where you lost every time you said the word "baby" and the one where you guess how big around the mom's belly is, but they had some other ones, too. They played bottle bowling, which Payson was pretty good at, and then a word scramble where everybody had to come up with as many words possible using the letters from _Alexandru Mark Tucker_. Beth won that one, which didn't surprise anyone. She was sweet and innocent, but she literally had a genius IQ so she was the smartest person in the room.

When they did the baby shower version of a beer chugging contest, Payson laughed so hard that she couldn't breathe. They filled baby bottles with milk and had a contest to see who could drink it the fastest with the nipple on. It didn't take long for someone to tweet a picture of Nastia Liukin and Shawn Johnson having a bottle sucking contest. Considering who they all were, it made complete sense to them to give fake Olympic medals to all the winners of the contests, and when Shawn won she playfully shouted, "Oh, who's the gold medalist now, Nastia?"

Emily was running the show, so she reigned in her laughter and said, "Okay, I think we should open the gifts now. If we don't stop the bottle chugging we might send Payson into early labor."

The gifts were all insanely adorable, mostly clothes and toys. There were a few things that Payson would have to return because she got multiples of them, like the monkey bath hood that she got three of, but some of them were definitely one of a kind. Chellsie had a blanket embroidered with Alex's name, Kelly gave her an elephant nightlight and Emily gave her a stuffed elephant, both of which matched the blanket that Sasha gave Payson for her birthday, and one of the onesies that Andy brought Payson had a fit over. It had a dinosaur on it and a word bubble that said "rawr!" Payson loved it and said that she was probably going to wear it out from putting it on Alex so much. As usual, though, Lauren's gift stole the show.

Payson pulled the tissue paper out of the bag and looked into before saying, "Oh my God." That usually indicated one of Lauren's notorious gag gifts, but Payson continued, "Where on earth did you find Fendi baby shoes?"

She took the present out of the bag and they were, in fact, Fendi baby shoes, just like the adult version that Austin wore. Lauren brushed off Payson's question. "Duh, from Fendi. Keep going."

Payson pulled another item out of the bag, and it was just as cute as the first. It was a tiny pair of Cobalt sunglasses with a strap that went around the head to keep them on the baby, and then there was a pair of Boss jeans and a Boss hoodie that looked exactly like one Emily had seen Austin wear before. It was a miniature copy of Austin's clothes even down to his favorite brands.

"This is amazing, Lauren," Payson said. "I'm not gonna lie, though, the shoes are my favorite part."

"Who here is surprised that Payson likes baby shoes?" Kelly quipped. Everyone in the room knew about Payson's love of shoes.

"Come on, you know these are awesome," Payson said. "Hold on while I take a picture of them."

She took a picture with her phone to send to Austin, and then put it up on twitter, too. _Yet another reason that I love TeamTanner. She bought Alex Fendi tennis shoes to match his daddy's._

"Wow," Alicia said, "that's a hard concept to grasp. You as a mom I totally get, but Austin as a _daddy_? That blows my mind." Austin and Alicia were both in Beijing and they were roughly the same age, so she probably got a front row seat to see Austin in his bad boy days.

"That's just because you don't spend much time around him anymore," Payson explained. "He's not the same person he was a few years ago. He's really ready to be a dad."

"So what kind of a person was I a few years ago?" They all turned around to see Austin standing in the doorway, sporting a huge grin and the same shoes they were just discussing.

Payson didn't hesitate to answer. "An arrogant jackass. What are you doing here?"

"I came to see how you ladies were doing. Your mom said that things were pretty wild in here, so I wanted to make sure that you survived whatever crazy stuff these four girls came up with."

Payson pushed herself out of her rocking chair and went to him. "Yeah, she and Carmen stopped in during bowling, so I think it was a little too rowdy for her. But I'm still alive and not in labor, so I think I survived."

"Good, because he is staying put for another couple of weeks. You hear that, Alex?" he said, placing his hands on either side of Payson's belly. "You are not ready to be born yet. Don't go making an early appearance."

Payson laughed at his antics and reached up to kiss him. "You can tell him that all you want, babe, but I don't think it's going to stop him if he decides to come. Although I agree with you; he should stay put for a while longer."

"Do you need me to put this stuff in my car when we head back to Boulder?" he asked. "You've got five people and five bags in Sasha's car, so I'm not sure this would fit with you guys."

She kissed him again and said, "You're wonderful. I'll call you when we're done in here so we can pack everything up."

When Austin left, Kelly said a phrase that they were all familiar with by now. "You're life is so fucked up, Payson."

Payson glared at her friend. "I'm well aware of that, Kelly, thank you."

Emily could see the confused expressions on everyone's faces, but nobody in the know attempted to explain away the strange comment. Most of them would probably be okay about Payson being with Sasha, but if they told a room full of girls it wouldn't take long for everybody to know.

Emily left the room on the pretext of finding a bathroom, but she actually ran to catch up with Austin. She called out his name to get his attention and said, "Come with me. We need to talk."

She pulled him into another empty conference room and turned to face him. Her voice was steely cold when she asked, "What happened in St. Louis?"

"What do you mean what happened? Doesn't the fact that she's pregnant tell you everything you need to know?"

"She said she was using drugs."

Austin paled. "If she told you that then why don't you ask her about it," he suggested.

"She didn't mean to say it. You know how she is, how she just doesn't watch what she's saying sometimes." They were all familiar with the particular tendency. It didn't happen with most people, but the people she was most comfortable around caught a lot of things on accident. "We asked her, but she said she didn't want to talk about it but we could ask you or Sasha if we wanted to know. I need to know this, Austin. Was she really using drugs?"

"Probably not the kind of drugs you're thinking about," he said. She could tell that he didn't want to talk about it, either. "She was taking Xanax. A lot of it, all through Nationals and for a week or two after."

"Why would she be taking Xanax?" That didn't make any sense. Xanax was a sedative, and Payson would never want to be sedated during Nationals.

His face hardened. "I don't know, Em, you tell me. What could have happened at Nationals that would push her into abusing narcotic anxiety medicine?"

It had been a long time since Austin had been that caustic, and never with Emily at all. He saved that particular tone for nosy media, which made Emily feel like crap. She was on the same level right now as nosy media.

"Her back?" she said, and waited for Austin's validation with a terse head nod. "I don't get it. She had problems when she first came back, but she got over that ages ago."

"You don't just get over almost being killed, Emily. It's PTSD. She was having flashbacks and panic attacks, and the pills were the only thing that got her through it."

"So what about… that night." She didn't know what to call it. "What happened?"

"Are you sure you want to know?" he asked. His voice made her think that maybe she didn't, but she needed to hear it. She nodded and he said, "Okay, then we better sit down."

They pulled a couple of chairs off a stack in the corner and sat down facing each other. Austin began his story. "I don't remember most of it, so a lot if this I only know because Payson told me. I guess what I should start out with is this—I was in love with her. I know you thought I had a crush on her, but I didn't. I loved her, and I should have told her but I was an idiot. I imagined a rejection that wasn't even there and I let it eat at me.

"We all knew that Nationals wasn't easy for her, but I really thought she was handling it well. I just thought she was a little stressed out, so when I asked her to go celebrate with me I thought, I get to spend time with her and she gets to relax, so good all around, right? But I just kept letting it eat at me that she didn't want me, and the more I thought about it the more I drank. I kept telling her to drink more, too, and Payson told me later that she just wasn't strong enough to say no that night. I took me months to figure out why I was pushing her so much, but I think it was a little bit of revenge. Not at her, because it never even occurred to me that anything bad would happen, but at Sasha. I was making her do something that he wouldn't want her to do.

"I remember that we started doing body shots, but I've pretty much lost everything after that. At some point I guess Payson got drunk enough to tell me everything, and my jackass reaction was to tell her that she needed to fuck somebody, and since I needed to fuck somebody, too, we should just solve the problem. Put yourself where she was—she was a little bit high, drunk, and screwed up enough that she was drugging herself into oblivion every night. Good decisions were out of her grasp at that point.

"I did a shot off her chest after that, and Payson glazed over what happened, but I can guess. What I do know is that I made damn sure she knew I wasn't joking. She kissed me, and that was all the encouragement I needed. I don't… like I said, I can only make guesses, but I hadn't had sex for a really long time and I resented her a lot for choosing Sasha over me, so I'm sure I was aggressive."

His words were full of self-loathing, but she couldn't manage any kind of comfort for him. The way he said it put things in a new perspective for her. She knew all the things Payson had said, about how much it hurt and how it felt like she was being held down because he was so much bigger than her, but Emily never really grasped that. In her mind, it made sense that it hurt because Payson was a virgin and they didn't take their time, but Austin said he was _aggressive_.

"Oh God, so when Payson said it was horrible, she didn't mean just bad. She really meant _horrible_."

Austin's face turned to stone and he left without another word, and only then did Emily realize how it must have made him feel to hear that. She felt like an idiot all around, for not understanding what Payson meant and for being stupid enough to mention it in front of Austin. Payson had said the same thing to him before, of course, but it was different hearing it from someone else. She sat stunned for a few minutes before she had the presence of mind to do something. She pulled out her cell phone and texted Payson, the only person who could even hope to help Austin right now. _Austin's upset. I said something really stupid._

It was several minutes before Payson answered. _I know. I'm with him now._

She didn't know what to do. It was stupid to just sit alone in an abandoned conference room, so she went back to the party to see what kind of damage she'd just caused. What kind of idiot was she to ask Austin about Nationals during Payson's baby shower?

When she stepped back into their own, very crowded conference room, Lauren asked, "Where have you been? And where is Payson?"

She lied about the first part. "I was on the phone with Damon. Why would I know where Payson is?"

"Just a little while ago she looked around and asked where you were," Kaylie explained, "and when nobody knew she said 'crap' and left."

Emily repeated the sentiment under her breath, and then said, "I don't know, maybe she's looking for me and we just missed each other." It wasn't very convincing. She wasn't a good liar like Lauren or a good actress like Payson. She tried to deflect attention. "So what did I miss while I was gone? What did she open?"

Kelly, another great actress, picked up on the diversion and ran with it. She managed to get all the attention on her while she showed off the newest items and made jokes about each one, and then pulled up an If They Mated app à la Conan O'Brien on her phone and connected it to the room's big screen TV. They made hilarious (and ugly) pictures of what Alex might look like.

The TV was on the back wall, so they didn't notice Payson come back until she said, "That is not what my son is going to look like. He'll be beautiful."

She was right. With Payson and Austin for parents, Alex was going to be gorgeous.

"Where did you go?" one of the younger gymnasts asked. Most of the older ones had figured out by now that something bad had happened and were nice enough to ignore it.

"I went to check on Emily, but I saw Austin and got a little bit distracted." This was where Emily could see the distinction between lying and acting for Payson. She wasn't just spitting out a lie, she was putting on a whole new personality. Her words had depth. She managed, with a single sentence, to convey concern for Emily, guilt for getting distracted, and absolute wantonness for the implied liaison with Austin. She turned to Emily and asked, "You're not sick again, are you?"

"No, I'm fine," Emily said, trying not to be flustered. "I just wanted to talk to Damon." If it had been one of the other girls saying that, Lauren would have had a backstory for it, Payson would have used an inflection and manner that explained it away, and Kelly would have had something outrageous to distract from it. Emily had none of that, so she depended on one of the other three to use their skills.

Kelly did it, because distraction worked the best for this particular situation. "Well, now that you're done macking on your baby daddy, can we get back to the presents? You've only got a few left, but one of them is mine so you're missing out on sheer awesomeness by waiting."

Payson agreed and came back to her seat of honor, but when Emily leaned in to hand her the next present (Kelly's) she whispered, "I know this is my fault, but seriously, Em, did you have to ask him now?"

Emily mouthed the word 'sorry' while her back was to the rest of the guests, and that was the end of the discussion. The party finished, girls started to leave, and Austin came back to gather up the presents to put in his car. Any real apologies would have to take place over the phone, because their short time together was up. Payson's bags were already loaded into Sasha's car along with her family's, and the girls had planes to catch out of Denver International. Emily wouldn't see Payson again until she gave birth.

She did have the comfort of knowing that she hadn't completely screwed things up between Payson and Austin, because when Austin came in to pick up another load of baby gifts to take to his car, Payson slid her arms around his shoulders and said, "I love you so much, Austin." Then she laid her hand on his chest and stayed that way for a minute or two. They loved each other and they always would.

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><p>AN: I love it when I get to make up completely unrealistic gymnastics moves. And when I get to write totally cheesy endings to chapters.

Loads on pinterest for this chapter: Jess and Becca's floor music, a video of what a Valdez is, Payson's clubbing outfit, and a few of the baby shower gifts. I googled Fendi baby shoes on a whim and was amused to find that they really do exist!


	83. Chapter 83

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

A/N: This chapter is a compilation of stories that friends told me and a few things that I read on the internet. I feel like there is a drinking game to be played here—every time you read the word 'push,' drink. It's like the word 'squat' was in the Bones season 7 premire.

* * *

><p>Payson was four days overdue, but she and Sasha were having more sex than ever. For two reasons, really. The first was that she said the only time that she wasn't uncomfortable was those few seconds of pleasure during her orgasms. The second was that she was trying everything possible to go into labor, and sex was high on the list of things that could start the process.<p>

Dr. Lehmann seemed to think that it would happen soon—something about dilating and effacing and position of the baby that Sasha didn't understand. He did know that you had to be dilated to have the baby, and Payson had been for a week and a half, but not enough. She topped off at 3 centimeters and stayed there. She had today and tomorrow to go into labor or they would induce on Saturday, something that neither Payson nor Dr. Lehmann wanted to do, so they'd spent the last week eating Thai food, walking, and having lots of sex.

Her breathing was still heavy when he helped her roll over onto her back and then, from there, onto her side. It was another of the long list of things that Sasha sort of understood but not really. She wasn't supposed to lie on her back for very long because it cut off her circulation, but for some reason she could sleep leaning back against his chest and that didn't cause a problem.

In the past she would have said something along the lines of "that was amazing." Now, she said, "If this baby doesn't come soon I'm going to _pull_ him out."

He let his curiosity get the best of him, as it had so many times before, and asked, "What would you do if you and I weren't together?"

"Don't ask questions if you don't want to hear the answer, love."

That was all the answer he needed. If he wasn't around to help her induce labor, she'd be using Austin to fill the same job. She was right; he didn't really want to hear that answer. Rather than think about it, he strolled right on to a new topic. "We've got to get up or we'll be late for work."

"Yeah, yeah, whatever," she mumbled. She was only half joking. The gym was incredibly important to her, but right now it wasn't all that high on her list of priorities. Her main motivation for going to work right now revolved around other people. She knew that her gymnasts, with the exception of Jess and Becca, were not going to get the same level of coaching while she was out on maternity leave and she wanted to give them as much as she could before that happened, and she wanted to be around Austin but refused to let him stop training. So every day she got up at five a.m. and trekked to the gym, even though she would rather be sleeping in.

She got in the shower while he pulled out his shaving kit, and a few minutes later she called, "Sasha, what time is it?"

He dug his watch out of the tray on the bathroom counter and answered, "Five thirty."

"It was barely five twenty when we got out of bed, and I know that ten minutes have not passed," she said, annoyance clear in her voice, "so what time is it really?"

"Okay, it's really five twenty six. Do four minutes really matter?"

She didn't answer. She just finished her shower and started getting ready. She didn't speak until he was done shaving and his razor was back where it belonged. "If you freak out I will hurt you," she said, "but I just went into labor."

His first reaction was, of course, to freak out, but he believed Payson when she said she would hurt him, so he fought hard to stay calm. "How do you know? You've been having contractions for weeks, so how do you know it's real this time?"

"Trust me, I know. This one was different."

"Shouldn't we go to the hospital?" he asked. He was in a state of barely controlled panic.

She rolled her eyes, which frustrated him a bit. This didn't seem like the appropriate time to be rolling her eyes. "Sasha, we probably have hours before that. If we went now they would just send me home. Until my contractions get closer and stronger or my water breaks, it's business as usual."

"How do you even know how close together they are? Haven't you only had one?"

"Exactly. It's been—" she picked up his watch and looked at it "—eleven minutes and I haven't had another one yet, so it's definitely not time to go to the hospital. I'm going to call Austin and Dr. Lehmann, and you need to get in the shower. We're going to be late for work if we keep standing here."

"_Now_ you want to go to work? Half an hour ago you didn't even want to get out of bed. How the hell are you so calm now?"

She shrugged. "Before everything was up in the air. Now it's not. I've never been worried about the labor part. It was the inducing part that scared me."

He suddenly realized what he was seeing—she was in her competition mode. Make a plan, get it done. It was infuriating as hell to see her so calm when he was half way to panic, but at least he understood where her head was. It was easier to follow her that way.

He managed to take a shower, although it was lightening fast, and when he came out Payson was just hanging up the phone. She kissed him and said, "Get dressed and go make me some toast. I still have a few more phone calls to make."

He raised an eyebrow in question. She said she had to call Austin and the doctor, so he wasn't sure what other calls she needed to make. She clarified, "I need to tell my mom, and then the girls want to be here for the birth so they need to catch planes. Go get ready."

It was easier for him when she gave him orders, because he had something to think about other than the fact that she could have a baby any minute now. He got dressed and made her breakfast (it wasn't quite as casual as she was making it out to be if she was letting him in the kitchen, even if it was just to make toast), and when he brought it up to her she was putting on her make up while the phone was on speaker. He could hear Lauren's sleepy voice on the other end, and when she hung up Payson called Kelly. Sasha could hear what they said.

Kelly answered the phone with "Don't you know it's impolite to call people before 5 a.m.?"

"Sorry, Kel, but it's after five here. You're just living in the wrong time zone."

Something must have clicked with Kelly, because she was suddenly awake and asking, "Oh shit, _why_ are you calling before 5 a.m.? Do Emily and I need to be getting on a plane?"

Kelly couldn't see the smirk on Payson's face, but Sasha could. "It might be a good idea. I think you probably have a few hours to spare, but I can't guarantee that."

There were a bunch of bumps that indicated Kelly was running across her apartment, and then pounding on a door. "Hey Emily!" she yelled. "Stop screwing Damon and get out here. Payson's having the baby!" To Payson she said, "We'll be there as soon as we can," and then hung up. Payson stood laughing at the bathroom counter.

He sat her food down in front of her. She was a master multi-tasker, so he knew she was probably going to eat and dry her hair at the same time, but she surprised him by kissing him first. Not a quick kiss like she did so many other times, but a passionate, searing kiss.

"I love you," she said. "I love you for supporting me since the beginning, I love you for never resenting the time I spend with Austin, I love you for loving Alex like he was your own. I love that you accept all my flaws and own up to yours. I love you, Sasha, and I'm so glad that I have you in my life."

He wasn't sure where it came from but every word meant the world to him. "I love you, too," he said. "You and Alex both."

She kissed him again and then moved on as if they hadn't just shared an extremely intimate moment. "Change of plans," she said. "You're going to work, and Austin and I are going to the doctor's office. I should be at the gym within an hour, probably less. Dr. Lehmann just wants to check how dilated I am and where the baby is before he sends me off to work."

"Why?" he asked. She was insistent that she didn't need to go to the hospital, so it concerned him that suddenly she needed to go to the doctor's office.

"Nothing bad has happened, if that's what you're thinking," she said. "He just wants to see how far dilated I am since I was already at three centimeters. I had a head start at the gate, so to say."

"Fine, but I'm not leaving until Austin gets here."

"I never thought you would. Now get out and let me dry my hair." She shoved him out of the bathroom and plugged in her hair dryer, and he could see that he was right. She was going to eat and dry her hair at the same time.

He paced until Austin got there, and then he drove to work and paced some more. It was going to be a long day, and he wouldn't be comfortable until Payson was in the hospital holding her son.

o-O-o

Austin was calmer than Sasha, but that wasn't saying much. Austin should have been the one who was more worried, but Payson was so calm that it helped calm him down, too. She'd spent a lot of time walking him through what was going to happen when she went into labor, so he wasn't going in blind.

Dr. Lehmann said that everything was fine and she would likely have most of the day before she went into hard labor and had to come to the hospital. Austin tried to talk her into staying at home for the day, but she said that women had been having babies since the beginning of time and many of them had worked right up until it was time for them to push, so she could afford to work for a few more hours, too. He didn't agree, but he knew it would be a fruitless battle. Payson always won.

She was amazing. Nobody at the gym realized that she was in labor, and she carried on like she wasn't in any pain at all. He asked her about it and she said that it hurt, but not as bad as her herniated disk and not even close the first few weeks after she broke her back. The only indication that she was having contractions at all was her frequent glances at the huge clock hanging high on one wall. He glanced every time she did, so he could tell how close they were getting. At some point they hit seven minutes apart and stayed that way. For five. Freaking. Hours. She called Dr. Lehmann after a couple hours of that, but he said she was fine unless the contractions started lasting for longer periods of time, her water broke, or she started having the urge to push. The hospital was only twelve minutes away (Austin timed it) so the doctor wasn't concerned about her not being able to make it there in time.

The girls arrived long before Payson was ready to go, but they were forbidden to step foot in the gym. It was a wise decision, because if they came it would have been chaos. Instead, they collected at the Tanner-Kmetko house and sent anxious texts to Kim every half hour.

It was nearly the end of the training day when Payson walked over to him and said, "You should go shower and change. It's time for us to go."

"Uh, isn't that wasting a little bit of time? If it's time for us to go, shouldn't we go _now_?"

"We have five minutes to spare, babe. I'm sure I'll get sweaty enough for the both of us, so you don't need to be, too." She reached up to kiss him. "Go. I'll be fine."

It was the fastest shower he'd ever taken. He was in, out, and dressed in the span of time that it took for Payson to leave instructions with the assistant coaches. Elite training might be ending for the day, but there were still classes to be held, and Payson coached three of them. Leave it to Payson to be thinking about who was covering her classes when she was about to give birth.

When they were alone together in her car, which they took that morning because it was easier for her to get in and out of than his, he said, "Seriously, Pay, how are you not freaking out right now?"

She laughed. "What would be the point of that? It's not like we can stop it from happening."

"You're really not scared at the prospect of pushing a small person out of your body?"

"When have I _ever_ been scared of pain?" she asked. She had a point. "I know it's going to hurt, but I also know it's temporary and that it's going to be worth it."

She stayed calm, all the way to the hospital and through check in and getting settled into her room, but when Austin walked through the hospital doors all of his control flew out the window. Holy shit, he was going to be a dad.

Mark was the first person to arrive once they were in their room, and Austin thanked God that he was. He had done this twice before, so he saw the panic in Austin's eyes and laid a steady hand on his shoulder. Suddenly Austin got why everyone talked about Payson needing someone there to support her during labor, because just having Mark standing beside him helped. He had done this before. He survived. He remembered a conversation long ago with Payson when he joked that his goal was to be like Mark. He concentrated on that. Be like Mark.

Not long after that, Sasha, Kim, and Becca showed up. They were trying not to make it obvious at the gym that Payson was about to have the baby, so they waited until the elite day was officially over and Becca was done with training before they came. It came as quite a shock to Becca, who didn't even know that her sister was in labor.

Payson had thought this out. Their room was more like a suite than anything, complete with a sitting area, so she got to spend a little bit of time with her family while they waited for the time to pass, which he hoped wouldn't be too long. Her water broke right before they left the gym, and Dr. Lehmann looked at her when she first came in and said that she was six centimeters dilated. It took her damn near twelve hours to get from the three she started at to the six she was at now, but supposedly the last few centimeters went way faster than the first several. If they had to go for another twelve hours he might lose his cool altogether and have a panic attack.

She didn't let them call the girls until she had spent some time with her family and was used to the room, because she knew that four excited teenagers would be overwhelming when she first got to the hospital. Even with the wait, they were still a little overwhelming. Her family switched out with the girls so that there were still the same number of people in the room as before, but somehow it seemed much more crowded.

Lauren cast a critical eye over Payson when they sat down. "You know, like eighty percent of the time I don't get the fashion icon thing, but then you do something like this."

At first Austin didn't know what she was talking about, but then he stopped to think about what Payson was wearing and realized that it was unusual. Her slinky gown and matching silk robe weren't exactly typical birth attire.

"I've spent enough time in hospital gowns to last me a lifetime," Payson said, "so I am not going to deliver my son in one. These gowns are designed for having babies."

They talked for a while, but when her contractions got past the point that she could handle them easily she asked for them to leave and send her mom back in.

The nurse, who was very nice but obviously hadn't read Payson's chart, asked, "It looks like you're headed into the hardest part now. Do you want me to get the anesthesiologist to do an epidural?"

"Well, if I didn't have a blood disease or a spine full of cement, that would be great, but since I have both the epidural is out of the cards for me."

She didn't say it in a mean way, but the nurse was still flustered. "Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't realize. Don't worry, though, these last few centimeters are the hardest part of labor, but they're also the shortest. It doesn't last very long and then you're ready to push."

Kim came in during the tail end of the nurse's awkward attempt at comfort and said, "It's not that bad, sweetie. I didn't have time for an epidural with Becca and she ended up easier than you."

Payson wasn't concerned about the epidural, but she was concerned about something else. "Where are Ava and Nicky? They should be here."

"They're outside in the waiting room. They got here about the same time as the girls and they didn't want to interrupt. Ava wants to see you though, if you're up for it."

"It's Ava. Of course I'm up for it. I want to see her before I get too far into this." They both knew that, even though Payson had experienced much worse pain before, she was not going to want visitors once the show really started. The contractions were already lasting longer and coming faster, so she needed to see Ava now.

Kim went to get his sister, and when she came in all she did was hug Payson for a long time. Then she let go of her and hugged Austin for just as long. This was one of the few times that Ava ever let herself be seen crying.

"Looks like you're going to be an aunt, A," he said, managing to get the words out despite the fact that she was crushing his lungs.

She pulled back and said, "And you're going to be a dad. Try not to screw the kid up too bad, big brother."

"Oh that's reassuring. You're really helping to calm the nerves here, sis."

"Don't be a wuss." That, strangely enough, was reassuring. It was good to know that even though the rest of his life was about to change, Ava was still the same. She turned back to Payson and had one of the girliest conversations he'd ever seen from two very un-girly women. They were both hugging and crying and saying things like "I'm so glad I have you in my life now" and "We're sisters now, and that's not ever going to change." It was like watching a zebra change its stripes and turn into a horse.

When Ava left, the whole atmosphere changed. Payson managed to push past what she was feeling long enough to talk to Ava, but her contractions were one on top of the other now and she was in pain. Fourteen hours into her labor, she finally lost her calm, and Austin found his. Now he had a purpose: help Payson.

"This is the worst part," Kim said. "You just have to get through this and then it's a downhill ride from there. Pushing won't be this bad."

A little over two hours later, Payson was muttering, "I'm going to hurt that nurse. If this is her idea of not lasting very long then she's obviously never done this."

She was leaning back against Austin's chest in one of the big arm chairs in the sitting area. The nurses kept trying to get her to lie down, but it didn't take her long to realize that she hated the bed with a fiery passion. They finally stopped telling her to lie down when Dr. Lehmann came to check on her and said that she should stay wherever she was most comfortable, but they didn't stop badgering her with offers for pain medications. Payson wasn't necessarily insistent on a natural birth, but she'd had too many experiences in the past where numbing pain had ended up causing her more harm than good, so she was going for more of a mind over matter approach. It was sort of working.

She'd moved around a lot during the past couple of hours, but the place she came back to most was sitting in this chair with Austin behind her. Her favorite way to sit had always been between his legs and leaning against his chest, which was apparently a universal preference for her. She sat the same way with Sasha a lot, too.

"In the nurse's defense, sweetie," Kim said, trying to placate her, "I don't think this is normal. When I had you it lasted about forty minutes, and with Becca it was only about fifteen. And believe me, I was counting every second."

"Then why is it taking so bloody long with me?"

Austin didn't answer, because he knew that Payson didn't want to hear anything about having a baby from a man. He let Kim answer all of these questions. "You're body isn't the same as everybody else's, Pay. We knew that this might be different for you."

Payson was sweaty, exhausted, and cranky. She kept muttering under her breath that it wasn't that bad and she'd had worse, obviously trying to remind herself of that. The thing with pain is that no matter how much worse you've had before, it doesn't make feeling it again any better. Even still, she was handling it really well. Austin had never seen anyone give birth before, so he couldn't be sure, but he thought that Payson was dealing better than most women. She wasn't in crippling pain; she was just tired, frustrated, and wanted it to be over.

She was muttering swear words under her breath when Dr. Lehmann came back in to check on her. He said something that nobody else could have gotten away with. "You are taking a very long time, aren't you?" If Austin or Kim had said it Payson would have bit their head off, but it was hard to get angry at Santa.

"Please tell me you're here to say it's almost over," Payson said. "Because everyone's been saying 'not much longer' for over an hour and it's starting to piss me off."

Dr. Lehmann chuckled. He was never bothered by anything Payson said. Mothers in this stage of labor were allowed to say whatever they wanted, he told them, because they were the ones doing all the work.

"Let us check," he said. He knelt in front of her to check her cervix, which Austin took as proof of what an awesome doctor he was. He didn't make Payson move around so that he could be comfortable while he examined her; he moved around so that _she_ could be comfortable. From all the stories he read (and he read a lot of them), most doctors were not that considerate. He smiled up at her and said, "Not much longer."

"That is not funny, Dr. Lehmann."

Dr. Lehmann appeared to disagree, because he was laughing. "You will laugh later. It is, however, true. Before long you will be ready to push, and my patients tell me that pushing is much more pleasant than labor."

She did laugh at that. Austin thought her laughing at all was a good sign. "I guarantee you than no woman has ever used the word pleasant to describe giving birth. I have the pain tolerance of a god and I'm still not enjoying this."

"I might be paraphrasing. Regardless, you will feel better when you have time to rest between contractions. They will slow down and then you will feel the need to push, and then your Alex will be with you."

Payson groaned. "Don't get me wrong, I'm so ready to have him, but does this mean I have to get back in that damn bed?"

"Not if you do not wish to," the doctor said, and Payson relaxed in his arms. It was ridiculous that she was more intimidated by the thought of getting in bed than having the baby. "If you are uncomfortable lying down then we will find a position that you are comfortable in. You may even have the baby in this chair if you wish."

A horrified look crossed the face of the nurse standing behind Dr. Lehmann. He obviously didn't clear this idea with the rest of the staff. Payson was rendered speechless by a particularly painful contraction, so Austin spoke for her. "Is that even possible? Isn't sitting in a chair kind of a bad position for a baby to be born?"

"She will be fine if you are there to support her back as you are now. We will move her to the edge of the cushion and let you hold her weight. Is that agreeable to you, Payson?"

"Giving birth in a handstand would be agreeable to me as long as it meant I didn't have to get back in the bed. But the chair is probably the better plan."

Somehow, without them noticing, the labor had leveled out while they were talking to Dr. Lehmann. The contractions were as intense as ever, but Payson had a few seconds to breathe between them. Dr. Lehmann said, "See? I told you it would be not much longer. Now, if you are going to stay here for the birth then we must make it ready for you. I suggest you walk for a few minutes, because you will not have a chance for quite a long time after this."

They did get up and walk for a few minutes, with Austin hovering anxiously behind Payson and Payson for once not protesting. She didn't really care if he was overprotective at this point. Her only thought was about how soon this would be over.

While they walked, the nurses covered the chair and the floor in front of it so that it was as close to a sterile bed as possible. They obviously thought that it was insane for Payson to have the baby in a chair, but Austin only cared about Dr. Lehmann and Payson's opinions. Payson said that lying in the bed was uncomfortable—or at least _more_ uncomfortable than the other options, since she wasn't comfortable anywhere—and he trusted her. She made a living off of knowing what her body could and could not do. Besides, he didn't really understand having the baby lying down. If she wasn't supposed to sleep on her back, then why was she supposed to give birth on her back?

Everything after that was a blur. He remembered her saying that she thought it was time, and he remembered holding her while she pushed, and then what seemed like just a few minutes later Dr. Lehmann was saying that he could see the head. Kim later told him that it was exactly thirty three minutes between Payson's first push and her last.

She was tired, not so much from those thirty minutes but from the two relentless hours before that, and Austin was completely supporting her weight, but he was whispering in her ear, "You can do this, Pay. Just a few more minutes and it will be over, and you'll have Alex in your arms. Just a little bit more."

He was overwhelmed by how much he loved her, and a couple of minutes later when he hear his son cry for the first time, he knew that everything was worth it. All of the pain that he and Payson went through together, all of the mistakes that he made before that, every mean word that his father ever said to him, it was all worth it because it ended with him here, in this hospital, holding Payson while their baby took his first breaths.

Payson collapsed back against him and the doctor laid Alex against her chest. He was red and wet and covered in slime, and he was the single most beautiful thing Austin had ever seen. This tiny, amazing little person was his son, half him and half Payson. Everything was worth it.

All that Payson could manage to say was a tearful "Oh my God." She laid against Austin's chest crying and gazing at Alex, unable to look away except for a single glace over her shoulder to say, "I love you, Austin. I love you so much."

The doctor and nurses were still working, but Austin didn't notice any of it except Dr. Lehmann quietly saying, "Let him nurse if he wants to, Payson."

Every second with Alex was more amazing than the last. He didn't know what he expected from breast feeding, but it was awe-inspiring. It was so natural; Alex was only a few minutes old and he knew how to seek out food. Austin kept coming back to the same word: amazing. He was amazed by Alex.

o-O-o

Alex Tucker was born at 8:09 p.m. on March 7th, seven pounds six ounces, eighteen and a half inches long.

It was now nearly 10:30, and they were still sitting in the waiting room. Kelly didn't resent the wait at all, but she never realized how boring births were, at least for the people not in the delivery room. It was hard, too, because if her baby had lived she would have been born around this time last year. Kelly never told anybody this, but she had a name for the baby. Sophia Grace Russo. She might not have even been a girl, but that's how Kelly thought of her. She would have Nicky's eyes and nose, Kelly's coloring and smile, and the dark hair that they both shared. She would wear blue instead of pink, because that was Kelly and Nicky's favorite color. At least that's how Kelly always imagined her.

It still hurt to be around Nicky, but they had all the same friends so it was unavoidable. She was almost used to it now, and she could almost deal with the fact that he had his arm around Ava's shoulders for most of the time they were there. She was reasonably certain that they weren't dating, so that helped, and she was also pretty sure that he was only doing it because Ava was so nervous, which helped too, but it still stung. Kelly had loved Nicky since she was three years old, and it was hard to deal with the fact that he would eventually fall in love with someone else. She would too, she guessed, but she couldn't imagine it now.

Ava was in with Payson right now. They were going back to see her one or two at a time, and there were a lot of people higher than Kelly on that list. Payson's dad went in right after the baby was born and stayed with them for a long while, and apparently she was sleeping for a lot of that time. When he came out he sent Sasha back, but he had lots of pictures to pass around for them to look at.

Sasha didn't stay very long because he didn't want to keep the sisters from seeing their nephew, but Kelly knew the real reason that he was being so selfless. He would be staying the night at the hospital and therefore would have more time with her than the others. His role of godfather and unofficial step-father earned him a chair next to Kim for the night, while everyone else would see them once and then come back the next day.

Ava and Becca had been back with Payson for a while, but Kelly wasn't keeping track of how long it had been. It would be a while before she got to see them anyway, so she was trying not to watch the clock. She figured that it would probably be Nicky next, since he was Austin's surrogate brother, with either Emily or Lauren since they were closest to Payson out of all of them. Then whichever one was left and Kaylie, and then Kelly. She didn't mind being last. She was the newest of the group and the fact that she was here at all said that she was family. Mark, Kim, Becca, Ava, and Nicky made up the Keeler family, and Emily, Lauren, Kaylie, and Kelly made up the Rock family. She wasn't sure how Nicky got lucky enough to be adopted by the Keelers, but at least he finally had someone in his life that gave a crap about him.

Becca and Ava came back to the waiting room and brought even more pictures for them to look at, but in the process of passing around her iPhone, Ava came to Kelly and whispered, "She wants to see you next."

"What?"

Ava's only response was to nudge Kelly's foot and jerk her head toward the door, and Kelly didn't know what else to do but to go. Why did Payson want to see her now?

Kelly knew exactly what she expected to see in the room: Payson wrapped in her silk robe looking all glowy while she held a baby bundled up in a blanket. What she actually saw was Payson with her silk robe hanging open and one shoulder of her gown pulled down while she held a baby that was sucking on her boob. "Geez, Payson, do you have to do that while people are in the room?"

"Actually, yeah. Alex doesn't care that you're here to see him. He cares that he's hungry, so if you want to see me at all these next few days, get used to this. It's gonna happen a lot." Kelly had worried that Payson would be different after the baby was born, but this was still the same old Payson, just with a baby attached to her boob. She moved Alex around in her arms and asked, "Do you want to hold him?"

"What? Why?" It was the wrong thing to say, but Payson didn't look offended. It's not that Kelly didn't want to hold Alex; she just didn't understand why Payson wanted her to.

Payson juggled the baby around and pulled the top of her gown back in place (thank God). "I know that being here is really hard for you," she said. "I might just be making it worse, I don't know, but I thought that holding him might help. Don't be afraid to say no if this is just too much too soon, but if you want to hold him you can."

"I…" she tried to find words to express what she was feeling, but she couldn't think of anything that would remotely be enough, so she settled for a lame, "Yeah."

Austin took the baby from Payson and brought him over. He showed her how to hold him—how did the world get so upside down that Austin Tucker was showing her how to hold a baby?—and then all of a sudden there was this tiny creature in her arms looking up at her… and crying. "I don't think he likes me."

"Give him time. So far his only experience outside of mommy and daddy is a nurse who stuck him with needles, so he probably has trust issues."

Kelly laughed at the incredibly Payson-like joke, proving again that motherhood had not changed her friend, but then the rest of what Payson said caught up to her. "Wait a minute, you mean that I'm the first person to hold him but you guys? What about your family?"

"He's only a few hours old," Austin said. "He's not quite ready to be passed around yet. Tomorrow he's probably going to get motion sick from all the back and forth, but for tonight it's just me and Pay. And now you."

Kelly was horrified to realize that she was crying. "Thank you. Thank you so much." Then, for some reason that she couldn't explain, she started talking to Alex. "You're a pretty lucky kid, you know that? You've got a whole room of people out there who love you. Some people don't even get one, but you've got a whole room. So when you grow up and get too cool for us, just remember that. You're lucky. You've got it pretty great here."

Payson's voice was soft, but it carried the few feet to where Kelly was standing. "I think we're the lucky ones here."

Kelly nodded but couldn't manage to pull her eyes away from the baby in her arms. "I think you're right. You're really, really lucky."

o-O-o

Austin was out cold in what the staff jokingly called the daddy bed and Kim was unconscious on the couch, but Sasha was drifting in and out of sleep. He slept upright quite a bit during the last month of the pregnancy because Payson liked to sleep leaning back against him, but it was different doing it in a chair. Every time he fell asleep some new ache would jolt him awake again, so he wasn't getting much rest. Neither were Payson and Austin, because they had to wake up every couple of hours to feed Alex.

A nurse tapped on the door, a courtesy that Sasha thought to be ridiculous in this situation. She was knocking lightly so that she didn't wake anybody up, but the whole point of her being there was to wake people up. It was time for Alex to eat, so she was there to make sure that Payson was awake to do it. Sasha put his hand out to stop her and whispered, "I'll do it."

She looked doubtful. This particular nurse, Cynthia, was doubtful about Sasha in general. She didn't understand his relationship with Payson or why he was even here at all, so that translated into distrust. Sasha didn't let it bother him. Kelly told them on a regular basis how messed up their lives were, so he expected people to be confused by the strange dynamic between him, Payson, and Austin. He didn't care that Cynthia didn't trust him as long as she didn't ask him to leave.

He ignored her and walked to where Payson was asleep in the bed. This place was like a hotel. No, that was a lie. The room she had the baby in was like a hotel. The room that she would be in for the next day or two was like a resort, complete with creature comforts and a view to kill for. Payson enjoyed the comfortable bed, but she laughed at the Jacuzzi tub. Who would ever want to sit in a tub when they could be spending time with their baby, she said.

"Wake up, love," he said, rubbing her shoulder. "It's time to feed Alex."

She mumbled into her pillow. "I'm awake. I never really went to sleep."

"Should I wake Austin so he has to suffer with you?" he teased.

"Laugh all you want, but when I start pumping you're going to be on night duty, too. Leave Austin alone and hand me my son." She sat up against a few pillows while Sasha lifted Alex out of his cot. A woman came in earlier and showed her how to nurse lying down, but he knew why she wanted to be up this time. She moved over so that he could sit beside her.

It was the first time they had alone since they left the house early in the morning. She rested her head on his shoulder and said, "So Austin and I have been talking about what Alex should call you. We were thinking maybe tătic, if you're okay with that."

He had never stopped to think about what Alex would call him, but he was floored that they would suggest tătic, especially Austin. Sasha thought back to the first day at the Rock when Austin raved against him. None of them would have believed then that Austin would suggest his son call Sasha daddy, even if it was in a different language.

"I—" he cut off, his throat too tight with emotion to speak. He took a minute to get himself under control and continued, "I would love that, Payson. I would love to be Alex's tătic."

Payson kissed his jaw and then turned back to her son. "Hear that, Alex? This is your tătic, but you know him pretty well, don't you? You heard his voice all the time when you were in my tummy, so you're old friends by now."

"I'm hard to miss, puiule. I'm the only one who speaks real English." He reached out to stroke a finger down Alex's cheek, and just as he was marveling at how soft the skin was, Alex grabbed his finger and gave him something new to marvel at. He couldn't believe that such a tiny little person could squeeze so tight.

"See, he does recognize you. He knows who we are. You know mommy and daddy and tătic, don't you Alex?"

Alex didn't stop nursing, but he did give a strong tug on Sasha's finger, prompting Sasha to say, "He's going to be a rings worker with a grip like that."

Payson glared at him. "No gymnastics propaganda, Sasha. If he does gymnastics it will be because he wants to, not because we've drilled it into his head."

"Sorry, love," he said. He chuckled while he dropped a kiss on her forehead. "No more, I promise. But if he does want to do gymnastics and he turns out a rings worker, I'm going to say I told you so."

"Do you _want_ to be kicked out of the bed?" He didn't answer, but she didn't carry through with the threat. Instead she snuggled closer to him and said, "You've been so wonderful today. Everything has been about me and Austin, and it means so much to me that you don't resent that."

"Today was _supposed_ to be about you and Austin. You had a baby together and today should be about that. I know you love me; I don't need you to give up Austin to prove it."

"Are you sure you don't mind him living with us for a while?" she asked. She knew he was. They had planned this from the beginning. A room for Austin was one of their requirements when they were looking for a house, but the day had been emotional enough that she needed validation.

He didn't hesitate. "I'm sure, love. Austin should be near his son. Besides, Austin being there means fewer night feedings for me."

The joke made her smile. She didn't say anything else; she just let them enjoy the time together in silence. When Alex was finished with his feeding Payson passed him over to Sasha to hold, and he felt his throat tighten again. She wasn't letting other people hold him yet, not until the next morning, so he was honored to be was one of the first.

Payson and Austin spent a lot of time speculating what Alex would look like and what characteristics he would take from each other them. Now that he was here, Sasha thought he looked more like a baby version of Mark than anything, but they got two things exactly right. The hint of downy hair on his head was dark like Austin's, and his eyes, when they were open, were a carbon copy of Payson's. Those eyes were one of the things nearly guaranteed to be on the children Sasha and Payson had together. Any child of theirs would have the blonde hair and green eyes that they both shared.

"Do you want another one of these someday?" he asked.

She hummed into his shirt, drifting off even as she spoke. "We'll see how much trouble this one gives us first, but yeah, I'd like to do this again with you."

Sasha thought he'd like to do this with her a few times, but that could wait for a while. He had to remind himself that she was only eighteen and that was very young to be having babies. In a few years though, he hoped that he could experience the same thing that Austin was experiencing now.

* * *

><p>AN: I have friends all the way through the birthing spectrum—some who are all about natural home births, some who want the typical hospital experience, and some who prefer a spa-like birthing center like the one Payson is at. As you can probably guess, the friend who gave birth in an arm chair was a home birth person, and the friend who told me about birthing gowns is a birthing center person. And speaking of birthing gowns, Payson's is up on pinterest.


	84. Chapter 84

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

A/N: I got on here to post this a couple of hours ago, but then I got caught up in google image searches for pictures for the AF Universe's future. I had way too much fun. If you've read Those Left Behind, go look at the Amor Fati Universe-Extra Stuff board on pinterest. If you haven't read Those Left Behind, you can still go and look, but you might be wondering who the hell the girl is.

I was trying to figure out how to write the way we say "doesn't" down here in the Texas/Oklahoma area and couldn't figure out how to do it. Something along the lines of "d'n't", but since that makes absolutely no sense when you're trying to read it, I went with the slightly more hillbilly option of saying "don't."

* * *

><p>Sasha was surprised by how quickly Alex took over their house. When they first brought him home everything felt foreign. Austin was living across the hall, there was a constant stream of people in and out of the house, and suddenly there was a small person sleeping in a bassinet beside their bed. It was chaotic.<p>

When the girls left Sunday evening it became more natural. The house was still busy, because Alex had a lot of family in Boulder, but there were boundaries. People called before they came over and it was mostly after work, training, or, in Ava's case, school. Austin and Payson got time alone with their child during the day to learn all about him, and Payson told Sasha everything he missed while he was at work. He would have liked to stay home with Alex, too, but he had no legitimate excuse to take time off.

Viola was over frequently, and she was already in love with Alex. She even went so far as to let Payson name her ViVi. Kevin and his wife, Laura, who visited a few weeks after Alex was born, gladly accepted the names Pop and Nina and their role as honorary grandparents. The poor kid was going to be very confused by the concept of a nuclear family. He had three parents, four grandparents, a great aunt, six aunts, and three uncles, and only six of the whole group were related by blood. That's not even taking into account that he had two other grandparents who were related by blood and weren't being counted. Their family was bizarre and wonderful.

Their house was covered now with evidence of a baby, and so was the office at the Rock. Alex was a month old and Payson was taking him to the gym a few hours every day while she worked and Austin trained. She wasn't coaching full time yet, and she hadn't gone back to her J.O. classes, but the U.S. Classic was little more than three months away and she needed to make sure her juniors were ready. They had a rhythm going that more or less revolved around Alex's feeding schedule. She would nurse him, play with him, and then work while he slept. She was now at the point that she would let her mom bottle feed him mid-morning, the most important time of the training schedule, and then take more time off in the afternoons.

Currently she was joining her girls in part of the afternoon conditioning set. She couldn't do all of it yet, but she could do some, and it was good exercise for her and a morale booster for her gymnasts. They couldn't complain that it was too hard when their recently-pregnant coach was doing it with them. Payson was enjoying it. No matter how active she stayed toward the end of her pregnancy, it couldn't compare to the satisfying burn of a hard work out.

When she got worn out she called Jake to take over and headed back to the office. Sasha followed and found her breathing hard while she sipped a Gatorade. "That is a lot harder than I remember it," she said.

Kim laughed. "Welcome to the post-pregnancy bliss. In reality it means that you're tired a lot and things that you could do before seem harder than they used to be."

"Yeah and the timing sucks, too," Payson said, frowning. "I can't justify changing the training schedule, but I missed play time with Alex."

She fed him at lunch and then went straight down to work, so now that she was back in the office he was asleep on his mat. Sasha kissed her forehead and said, "You have to share, love. If Austin is going to change diapers and feed him, he needs to play with him, too."

It was a running joke in their house that Payson didn't want to share Alex. It was a carryover from the early days of the pregnancy when she was so afraid that she would miscarry. She still had vestiges of that fear and she was always reluctant to let someone else take care of him. She wouldn't even let Austin keep the bassinet in his room on the nights that he did feedings until just a few nights ago. Alex woke up fussing twice while she and Sasha were trying to have sex for the first time since he was born, and after that Payson decided that she could deal with him sleeping in Austin's room a couple of days a week. Sasha wasn't sure if she told Austin the reason for the change of heart or not, and he didn't want to find out.

Payson returned his kiss with one on the lips, but it wasn't their usual peck. She slid her arms around his shoulders and pressed her body to his until he responded in kind, and considering that he had only had sex one time in over a month, it didn't take him long. She told him once that working out turned her on, but this was the first time he got to experience that. He had a feeling that he was going to enjoy this aspect of her.

There was a sharp throat clear behind them and Payson said, "Go away, mom."

"Do you realize that you're in a public office in a building filled with people who don't know you're involved?" Kim asked.

Payson pulled away but, as usual, was not as contrite as she should be. "Spoil sport," she said. She flopped down in her chair and asked, "So did I miss anything incredibly important with Alex while I was downstairs?"

"Yes, he learned to walk."

Sasha had known the women for two years now, and they still both managed to surprise him. Payson could go from overprotective to amorous to flippant in a heartbeat, and even though Sasha had heard Kim be sarcastic before, that response was a new level for her.

Payson grinned. "That's my boy. Awesome even at five weeks."

Kim looked over to where Alex was asleep on his mat and her expression softened. "He's been awesome since day one."

"Definitely awesome," Payson agreed. Her expression was identical to Kim's. "He takes after his daddy."

Once again Sasha thought back to the early days of the pregnancy. Payson's opinion of Austin then tended to be that he was an arse, but now she attributed all of Alex's good qualities to his father. When someone said something nice about Alex, Payson's response was always, "Yeah, he gets it from Austin."

With another lightening fast change, Payson told Sasha to get out of the office so she could do some work. The subject changes were all good natured and teasing, and he came to expect them by now, but his head still spun when it happened. He did go back to work, splitting his time between the senior elites and the junior elites as long as Payson was upstairs. When he went back to the office a while later Payson was nursing Alex while she sorted through the new applicants, sitting aside two for them to review in greater detail later and all of the others into the denial pile, and when he came back a second time she was sitting on the floor with Alex lying against her propped up knees. She was telling him a story, apparently from memory.

She read _Don Quixote_ to him every night, and when Sasha asked why she was reading that instead of a children's book, she said that it wasn't the story that was important, it was her voice. It was soft and soothing, and Alex seemed to have figured out that when she read to him with that tone of voice it was time to go to sleep. This was completely different, and it was enchanting to watch her. She was telling the story with silly faces and excited exaggeration:

"_Wild_ creatures with _wild_ eyes, TOO MUCH hair, and _very_ bad manners lived there…"

Sasha leaned against the door to watch her, and he noted that Kim was watching too, just as enraptured as he was. He loved seeing this side of Payson.

Alex was loving it, too. He squealed whenever she did something crazy, waved his arms around when she took a dramatic pause like he was begging her to keep going, and cooed whenever she kissed him to match what was happening in the story. When Payson finished the story and clapped his hands together, that was a game in and of itself and Alex was fascinated.

Kim was the one to break the spell they were under. "I'd forgotten all about that book."

"How could you?" Payson asked, still smiling as she looked up from playing with her baby. "Becca made us read it every night for a year. I know it by heart."

"Obviously," Sasha said. Payson startled because she didn't know he was there. She was far too caught up in Alex to notice Sasha coming in.

"Geez, someone should have warned me that I had an audience. I wouldn't have been so crazy with it."

"I like you crazy with it," he said. "You were amazing. A natural mum."

He wasn't surprised by how great Payson was at parenting. He knew from the beginning that she would make a great mum because she had a great mum to model herself after. He was a little surprised at how great Austin was at it. Sasha supposed that Austin was so used to being silly at the gym that being silly with a baby came easy to him, and he knew from his own family experience what _not_ to do.

Payson gathered Alex in her arms and scrambled to her feet. "It's really nice to be able to do that again," she said, referring to getting up off the floor. Then she turned to speak to Alex. "Let's take a trip downstairs, cuddlebug. You've been up in this office all day long and you need a change of scenery. I'll bet daddy's ready to take a break and play with you."

Alex's response was enthusiastic. He just recently figured out how to make noises and he was testing them out at every opportunity. They went downstairs and Sasha watched through the window as Payson passed him over to Austin and they had a short little family time. A few of the gymnasts stopped by to say hi to Alex and shake a little hand or foot, but Payson made it clear from day one that having a baby on the floor was not an excuse to stop working, so it was always drive by cuddling.

Sasha settled into the chair that he was constantly juggling with Payson. They had three people working in this office and only two desks, so they all moved around depending on what they were doing. Technically he and Payson shared a desk and Kim had the other, but it really worked out more that he and Payson shared one and they all shared the other.

"So what's going on in the media now?" he asked. He hated the media rubbish and tried to avoid it as much as possible, but occasionally he checked in with Kim or Payson to make sure that there was nothing concerning. "Has all the fuss about the blood transfusion cleared up?"

"Mostly, but there are still a few people spreading around that she's terminally ill." The day after Alex was born, Austin tweeted a picture of Payson looking down at the baby in her arms with the caption "The two most beautiful people in the world." It was supposed to be a low key way of announcing the birth without MJ having to put out a press release, but the picture had unintended consequences. In the background there was a bag of blood hanging from an IV pole, given to ensure that she didn't have a relapse post-pregnancy. Austin didn't even notice that it was there, because transfusions stopped being a big deal to them a long time ago, but it sent the public into a frenzy. There were people predicting her death within minutes of the picture being posted.

Later that day Payson released an official statement, drafted by MJ: "I appreciate the outpouring of concern and support in response to a photo shared by Austin earlier today, and I would like to assure you all that both I and my baby are in perfect health. If we had realized that the transfusion was taking place in that photograph then Austin would not have posted it, but receiving blood is, unfortunately, very commonplace for me and not something that we give notice to. Transfusions are a routine part of any medical procedure for me and do not in any way signify a regression in my health. I am very healthy and very happy, and I can joyfully say that my son has been tested and does not share the red blood cell abnormality that has caused me so many difficulties. I am honored that so many people care about my health and am thankful that I can honestly say there is no need for concern."

Sasha was glad that he never had the kind of attention that Payson got. He had several endorsements and got a lot of publicity for being 'Britain's Bad Boy,' but it was nothing compared to what Payson had to put up with on a daily basis. Austin's fame had been akin to what Sasha's was until he was linked with Payson. The connection with her made Austin a lot more important in the media, and it was still only a fraction of the attention paid to Payson.

"I worry about what all this attention will do to Alex," Kim said. It was a worry that they all shared. "He'll be under so much pressure. I almost hope that he doesn't want to do gymnastics when he grows up, because who could ever live up to the expectations that the public will set for him?"

"He has Payson, though," Sasha said. "If a child has to be born into fame Payson is the mum to have. She brushes it all aside."

Kim cast a sly look at him. "Have the two of you talked about having children of your own one day? I can hear it in your voice that you want them."

"We have." He wasn't entirely comfortable having this conversation with Kim, but he couldn't get out of it. "She said that she wants to wait for a few years, which is understandable. She looks like an adult and acts like an adult, so it's easy to forget that she is technically a teenager."

"Well, just do me a favor and get married before you have them," Kim joked. "I don't think I could deal with Payson having _two _children before she's married."

She was teasing, but Sasha's mind went back to the corner of their closet where his suit was hanging and a set of rings was tucked away in the pocket. Don't waste this time, Viola said. He was just trying to figure out the line between asking too soon and waiting too long, and he wasn't sure where that was yet.

o-O-o

Kim and Payson were out having a moms' day, so Austin and Alex were having a boys' day. Sasha was nice enough to make himself scarce for a while so that Austin could have some one on one with his son. Austin was going to have to return the favor one of these days and let Sasha have some bonding time with Alex, too. Their house was so busy that even though they all spent tons of time holding, caring for, and playing with Alex, there was almost always another adult around.

This was the first time that Austin had a full day taking care of Alex by himself, and the conclusion that he drew from it was that he was very glad he wasn't a single dad—not in the conventional sense, at least. He appreciated the help that he got from Payson and Sasha on an everyday basis, because a day by himself was one thing, but a whole life taking care of a kid by himself was another thing altogether. He'd go nuts.

Austin was finishing up a diaper change and a clothes change, because Alex spit up on himself, when the doorbell rang. Most people called before they came over, so he was confused about who was there, but then he realized that he didn't have his phone with him. He backtracked until he found it hiding under Alex's stuffed elephant and unlocked it as he headed downstairs. There were six missed calls from Ava.

He swung the door open and said, "Whoa, A, where's the fire?—_Mom?_"

Even as he took in the sight of his mother standing on his front porch, his phone vibrated again. He picked it up and said, "Got the message, A. Mom's here." Then he hung up. He knew that's what Ava had been calling to tell him. His parents didn't know where he was living now, so of course she would have had to go by his lakehouse first.

"Hi baby," she said. She looked nervous. The last time they saw each other was nearly two years ago, and they had only spoken a handful of times since then. "It's been a long while. How ya' been?"

"Gooood," he dragged out. He wasn't sure what he was supposed to say. "Won some gold medals, had a baby. Can't complain."

She reached her hand out to Alex, who groped for it with all the enthusiasm you would expect from a ten week old baby. He smiled and laughed and reached out to her until Austin reluctantly handed him over. It wasn't that he didn't trust his mom; he just didn't really know her anymore. He moved out as soon as he cashed his first endorsement check and almost never saw her after that. He didn't know what to expect.

"I thought he'd look more like you," she said. He appreciated the honesty, at least. A lot of people said, "Oh, he looks just like you!" even though they knew it was total crap. The only thing Alex got from Austin was his hair. He was the spitting image of Payson's dad.

"So does the fact that you're here mean that you've left your abusive bastard of a husband?" he asked.

"Austin, don't talk that way about your daddy."

"That's a no." He didn't really expect it to be true. He gave up on that hope when he was thirteen and they moved to Dallas. She stood up to him, and Austin owed her so much for doing that, but she could have left Robert in the Oklahoma dust and they all would have been better off for it. For some reason that Austin would never understand she loved the bastard. "So what are you doing here? There's no way he knows you're here. He would never let you come."

She cringed, but he didn't apologize for telling the truth. "He's in Shreveport with some friends from work this weekend, so I thought I'd come by and meet my grandson while I had some free time."

"You mean he's out with some other men who pretend to be mechanics from that garage that they pretend is a business, gambling away the money they made on their one customer this year, and you thought you would take that opportunity to sneak away and see your kids. Please tell me you didn't give him any of my money to spend there."

"I kept my promise, baby," she said. Austin was twenty four years old but he still felt all the force of his mother's disapproval over his rant. "He don't know about the money. There ain't no call for you to be behavin' like this."

"I—" The excuse died on his lips. She was right; he was acting like a child and he shouldn't set that example for Alex. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that."

She smiled and she looked so much like Ava that he was stunned. "Well can I come in then or should I stand here holdin' my grandbaby on my hip all day?"

"What? Oh, uh, yeah. Come in." He stepped aside for her to pass into the house and it occurred to him that this was going to be even more awkward that he first thought. He had to explain Sasha.

She passed by him into the living room and looked all around. With a jolt he realized that she had probably never seen a house like this. They lived in low income housing all of his life, and she grew up in a single wide in Madill, Oklahoma, so this was the fanciest home she'd ever been in. It made him ashamed to think about the ridiculous extravagance of his lakehouse.

"The place looks nice, baby. You did real good for yourself."

"Well, it's actually not my house," he said. He might as well rip the band aid off quickly. "I'm living here indefinitely right now because of Alex, but it's Payson and Sasha's house."

Louise Tucker was nothing if not calm. She had to be to put up with Robert for so many years, so she didn't have much of a reaction to Austin's words other than to say, "Sasha's you're coach, right? So why would he be ownin' a house with the mama of your son?"

She knew or she would have said girlfriend instead of 'mama of your son,' but he spelled it out anyway. "Because they're a couple. Have been for a few months now."

"Austin, baby, I'm gonna need some explainin' here." That was it. No judgment, no disappointment, no shock. Nothing but a request for an explanation, which finally broke him. He told her everything, from falling in love with Payson and the night in St. Louis, to their bad beginning and the development of a real relationship, to the end of it, all the way up to what they had together now.

She listened without ever interrupting him, and when he finished his story she said, "I'm proud of you, baby. You're right, lettin' go when things are over is what's best. Me and your daddy hung on too long and it weren't no favor to you and Ava."

"So why are you still hanging on?" he asked. It was a question that plagued him his whole life. "If you know you're no good together then why do you stay?"

"It's too late, Austin. What do you think would happen to him if I left? I know I don't do much, but I keep him alive and I keep him outta jail, and he can't do that for himself. His mama took care of him and then we got married and I took care of him, so he don't know how to do it himself. He'd get in trouble borrowin' money and be dead within a month, and it would be on my head."

Austin had no idea what to say. He always thought that his mom didn't leave because she wasn't strong enough or brave enough, but it never occurred to him that she might have an actual _reason_. He couldn't figure out if she was being brave and self-sacrificing or if she had Stockholm syndrome. Austin liked to think that he'd shaken his own Stockholm syndrome, but he wasn't entirely sure it was true. If he'd completely written off his dad then he wouldn't have left him tickets to London and he wouldn't have been so angry about his reaction to the pregnancy. Mostly he tried not to think about it.

His mom changed the subject, which she was an expert at because she had to spend so much time diverting Robert's attention away from things when he got on a tirade. "That's enough of that. The whole reason I came here was to meet my grandbaby, and we haven't said a word about him yet. Tell me all about this little angel."

They sat talking for hours, and it was awkward, but at least they didn't have the possibility of his dad coming home hanging over their heads. Austin knew this would be the last time they had like this, because she would go back to Texas and Robert would never let her leave again. This was a stolen opportunity, and there probably wouldn't be another one.

Payson was surprised when she got home, but she handled it with grace. The three of them had dinner together and the women got along okay, even though it was clear that neither of them understood the other. In a way it was good that his mom wasn't going to be nearby, because she and Payson were so different in their ways of thinking that they would never see eye to eye. Payson would never understand Louise's decision to stay in an abusive marriage and subject her children to the consequences, and Louise would never understand Payson's assertiveness.

Ava wouldn't come. Austin protected her from a lot of the emotional abuse, but she still felt the full force of their parents' neglect and she wasn't ready to forgive them yet. Austin wasn't really, either, but he could (mostly) put aside the resentment for one night with his mom.

Louise wasn't staying in Boulder. She couldn't; she had to be back before Robert, and she didn't know when that might be. She caught a plane out of Denver late that evening so that she could be home long before the sun even rose the next day.

Austin saw her off in a cab rather than driving her to the airport, because he didn't think he could handle being alone with her without the help of Alex, and then went back inside. Payson handed him his son as soon as he sat down next to her. She knew that it had been an emotional day and he needed the comfort that holding Alex always gave him.

"I never knew that you had an Oklahoma accent," she said. It was an obvious attempt to distract him and it worked.

"I _don't_."

"Yes you do, babe. You did all night. I guess being around your mom brought it out."

Crap. He worked hard to get rid of that accent and he thought it was gone for good, but apparently it was still there when he let his walls down. "I don't have an accent, Pay. I had an accent when I was a kid and then I moved to Dallas and practiced 'til I got rid of it."

"Okay, fine," she said, throwing him a cheeky smile, "You don't have an accent. But I thought it was cute anyway."

"Oh yeah, accents are kind of your thing, huh?"

He was pretty sure she would have shoved him if he wasn't holding Alex, but instead she rolled her eyes and said, "You're incorrigible."

"I'll have you know that I'm completely corrigible," he teased. It was an old joke, but it still made them both smile.

She gave him the distraction he needed long enough for him to sort out his feelings, but they had to talk about it eventually so she asked, "Are you okay? The last time you talked to her didn't go very well, and she kind of sprung this visit on you."

"I'm fine, Pay. Last time wasn't her fault. It was dad's."

"But she let it happen." He hated when she did that. She knew what he was feeling even when he didn't. She was like a character in a fairy tale, and her magical power was to look into people's hearts—obviously Austin needed to stop listening when Sasha read Grimm's Fairy Tales to Alex. It was warping his mind.

"I feel like a horrible person. It's not like I didn't enjoy seeing her again, because I did, but the whole time she was here I kept thinking, thank God Payson isn't like her." Alex was at the forefront of any decision that Payson made, but it had never been that way for the Tuckers. With the one huge exception of moving to Dallas, Austin and Ava were an afterthought in their parents' lives. His mom never thought about how her staying with Robert would affect her children, but Payson wasn't like that. She gave up Austin because it was best for Alex, and Austin and Sasha were the only ones who truly understood how difficult that was for her.

Payson curled into his side to comfort him. "You're not a horrible person, Austin. You're a wonderful person and a great father, and I love you. It's okay to be mad at her. Just don't let it eat at you."

He sat for a little while just holding his family, which helped him deal with the whirlwind seeing his mother had started inside of him. Alex wiggled in Austin's arms until his little eyes were staring up at Austin and telling him that it was all going to be okay, and little by little the tension washed away.

"Do you mind if I keep Alex with me tonight?" he asked Payson. Whenever any of them had a bad day, Alex was always the one to ground them and comfort them, and even though it was Alex's bedtime, Austin wasn't ready to give that up.

"Of course you can." Payson reached out to stroke her baby's face like she was coming to terms with parting with him, which he knew she was. Alex slept in Austin's room a couple of times each week so that he could do the night feedings, and Payson always had a hard time putting him to bed on those nights. She hated being apart from him for even a night, but she knew it was necessary for all of them. Austin needed the time with Alex, Payson needed to cope with her separation anxiety, and Payson and Sasha needed time alone together. They went from spending hours alone with each other every day to having only the time in the evenings before they fell asleep, and it was hard on both of them.

"Look at it this way," Austin joked, trying to break the tension she felt about sleeping without Alex. "Now you can have uninterrupted sex."

He got a smile out of her. "If Sasha ever gets home I can. I'm sure if he knew that you were going to take Alex he wouldn't have stayed out so late."

"Yeah, where is he, anyway? I didn't get a clear idea of what he was doing with your dad all day."

"They're fishing," she said. "Out on a boat and everything, and apparently the fish bite better in the evenings."

"You should wait until he's actually here to mock him, Pay." He was enjoying the normalcy with her after such an un-normal day. It should probably worry him that this was their normal, but it didn't.

"Oh don't worry," Payson said. "I'll mock him again to his face when he gets home."

Alex was getting fussy because it was past his bedtime, so Austin broke up their family time so that he and Payson could put their baby to bed. It was the same every night—Austin bathed him, Payson nursed him, and then they put him down in his bassinet while Payson read to him. Austin found that he needed the routine as much as Alex did. It was like an official end to the day, which he never had before. Growing up the end of his day usually involved hiding in his room while his dad insulted them ten ways to Sunday, and since he moved out on his own his bedtime ritual was either to work out until he was so exhausted that he passed out or to drink until he passed out. He liked the new way better.

When Alex nodded off Austin and Payson laid back together on the bed. This wasn't part of the ritual, but it was always nice when they got to do it. It took a while for them to be comfortable in bed together after she and Sasha got together, because it was a new dynamic for them, but they were past that initial confusion. They knew where they stood with each other, so they could sleep in the same bed without it being romantic. It was the same strange balance that they had in the rest of their lives—all the intimacy of being husband and wife, but without the sex. Sometimes he even thought that they were _more_ intimate than most husbands and wives.

As usual, Payson's mind was in the same place as his. "I feel sorry for your mom," she said, "because she never got to feel this. Sometimes I think I'm either extremely lucky or extremely selfish to love you and Sasha both so much. Some women never even get one real love, but I got two."

"Well I'm not quite as selfish," he joked. "I'll settle for just the one."

"You'll fall in love with someone else too one of these days. Just make sure she knows that she has to share you with me, because I'm not going to give you up."

He didn't tell her she was wrong because it would just make her feel bad. She wanted to imagine that he would find someone and love her the way she and Sasha loved each other, but he knew it wasn't going to happen. She was it for him. He was sure that he would date other women eventually, but Payson was always going to be the one he came home to, and he was okay with that. Like she said, most people didn't even get one real love, so he wasn't expecting a second. Payson was enough.

o-O-o

Sasha was in his office playing with Alex when he heard the unmistakable sound of feet pounding across the floor. The last J.O. class ended fifteen minutes ago and all the gymnasts were gone, so there was only one possible explanation for the sounds. Payson was tumbling.

He'd been wondering when it would happen. She was doing the whole conditioning circuit with her juniors now, and she had been sending longing looks at the equipment for weeks while she worked with them. Most people might not notice, but Sasha did. Austin, too. They even had a bet on about when she would start and what apparatus it would be on. It looked like they were at a draw. Austin got the when and Sasha got the apparatus. Sasha expected her to give in earlier but he knew it would be on the floor; Austin knew that she needed more time but thought that she would start on the bars.

He picked Alex up and carried him to the door so that he could watch his mum. She was spectacular. The Rock t-shirt she wore during the day was discarded on the side of the floor so that she was tumbling in just cut off sweats and a sports bra, something that she would never do if other people were around. She joked around that her body wasn't ready for prime time yet, but he thought she looked bloody brilliant.

The skills that she was throwing were a reflection of her time coaching. There was an order to what she was doing. A back tuck first until she had a perfect understanding of her new body, and then a back layout, a half twist, a full twist. She worked each skill until she was completely comfortable with it before she moved to the next. When she mastered the basic back saltos she moved on to the front saltos and repeated the process, and then followed those with an Arabian. Within an hour she had all the B-level tumbles and even one C, and she was working her way toward a back one and a half, which was another C-level skill. A and B skills were instinct for someone who had been doing elite gymnastics as long as Payson, but from here on out it would be a little tougher. It wasn't just a matter of freshening up her muscle memory and adjusting for a few changes in her body; if she wanted to get back the advanced tumbles she was going to have to rebuild her strength and relearn the skill.

She landed a decent one and a half, though it was far from perfect, and then looked up toward the office. She knew she was being watched, had known it for the past hour, but she could tell out of instinct that Alex was getting fussy and it was time to stop. She bounded over to them and climbed over the railing rather than taking the stairs. Doing gymnastics for the first time in nearly a year had energized her to the point that no stranger would be able to tell she had a baby three short months ago.

She reigned herself in when she reached them so that she wouldn't rile up Alex. She took him out of Sasha's arms and peppered kisses on the top of his head, and then she raised on her toes to give Sasha a very different kind of kiss.

When they broke apart he said, "You were brilliant, Payson."

"What, the gymnastics or the kiss?"

"Both. But I was mostly referring to the gymnastics."

If she was less excited she would have a sarcastic reply, but as it was she said, "That felt amazing, Sasha. I've missed it so much, and I think it's going to come back better than I thought. That one and a half wasn't great, but my shape didn't mess it up as much as I thought it would."

"Just don't get complacent," he said. He couldn't stop the coach part of him from coming out even when he was talking to his girlfriend and fellow coach. "I don't think you're body is done changing, so don't get so comfortable with it that you don't pay attention."

On any other day she would have been annoyed that he was talking to her like a junior novice, but she was still riding on a gymnastics high and let it slide. "I'd love to keep working, but we need to get home. It's nearly cuddlebug's bedtime and he is not going to be a happy baby if we keep him up late." The last part was said more to Alex than to Sasha. She was right; he would be going down a little bit late as it was, but if they stayed around talking it would be even later, which meant that Alex would not sleep well. It threw everything off for him when his routines got messed up.

It wasn't until they were home and she was nursing in the rocking chair that Mark and Sasha made for her that they addressed the subject again. She, Sasha, and Austin talked in hushed tones while Payson told Austin every detail of her impromptu training session. She was in a state of forced relaxation, because if she got excited then so would Alex. On the outside she was calm, but there was fire in her eyes. She caught the gymnastics bug again.

"I can't do this again, though," she said when she finished describing her forward full, the only C skill she perfected that night. "It's not fair to Alex to keep him up late so I can work out, so Tuesday and Thursday nights are going to have to be off limits."

Tuesdays and Thursdays were the days she coached the level 8, 9, and 10s, and that didn't end 'til seven. With her practice tonight it ended up being past eight thirty when they got home, so they couldn't quite manage Alex's normal nine o' clock bedtime. They didn't miss it by much but, as she said, it wasn't fair to do that to him on a regular basis.

"You still have the other days," Austin said, "and you could probably do a morning workout with Jess if you really wanted to. She could learn a lot from working with you like that."

Jess was much like Payson and came in early every single day, which was the reason that Payson and Sasha had to be there early every day, too. Technically only Payson had to be there, but she would get in a strop if Sasha didn't go with her.

Payson chuckled, making sure to keep it soft so that she didn't disturb Alex, and said, "I'm not training again, Austin. I'm just doing this for fun, so I don't need to practice every day."

"Yeah, but you will."

Austin was saved from a retort by the fact that Alex was starting to doze off, so Payson eased him off her breast and laid him in his cot. She read to Alex, kissed Austin goodnight, and then crawled into bed with Sasha, bringing their day to a close. But after day came night, and that was one of Sasha's favorite times with her.

All of the joy and passion she felt doing gymnastics that day boiled over into their lovemaking, and it was one of their best times—top ten at least, maybe even higher. When they laid together after, Payson groaned out, "God, this has been a great day. First gymnastics and then this."

Something she said earlier was weighing on his mind. She was so excited to be doing gymnastics again, and he understood in a new way how deeply the sport was ingrained in her. Sasha did miss doing gymnastics, but coaching was enough for him. It wasn't for Payson. She needed to be _doing_ it, not just teaching it, so he asked, "Payson, are you sure you don't want to train again? The way you were out there, and the way you've been talking about it… you don't sound like you're finished."

"I'm not finished, but that doesn't mean I'm going to start competing again. It's the same for me as it is for the other girls. We're doing it for fun."

The other girls were just doing it for fun, but Payson wasn't like them and never had been. She would never be content to stagnate. She needed to challenge herself, and Sasha wasn't sure where that challenge would take her. He was sure of one thing, though—the gymnastics world had not seen the last of Payson Keeler. Not by a long shot.

o-O-o

As far as Sasha could tell, Americans took every excuse possible to gather for an unhealthy binge of food and alcohol. He took this as proof that America and the UK weren't so different after all.

Apparently this holiday required the use of a large yard, so he and Payson were the obvious choice of hosts. Sasha and Mark constructed several more picnic tables for the occasion, although none of them had the fine craftsmanship of the first table. They were slap jobs and looked at odds with the several other pieces of furniture that the two men had painstakingly created over the past year, but would serve their purpose well. After the party they would deconstruct them and use the wood for something more suited to the house.

He still thought it was ridiculous that the holiday was referred to as the 4th of July rather than Independence Day, but nobody listened when he grumbled about that fact. It didn't take him long to drop the subject because, as with Thanksgiving, he would take any excuse that led to Payson baking pies.

She wasn't going to eat the pies or most of the other unhealthy foods. Sasha and Austin both agreed that the restraint was a result of her unacknowledged desire to return to competitive gymnastics, but she said, and probably believed, that she was still mindful of her baby weight. Her very brief dress gave lie to that excuse. Nobody self-conscious about their body wore a dress that short.

That dress was making it very hard for him to concentrate on driving the citronella torches into the ground. She kept leaning over to place things on the table, and each time her hem rose to show an indecent amount of skin. It would be so easy to—no, he would not let himself think about that. If his mind went there it would be too easy for his body to follow. They had done it before, with almost the exact same circumstances. Her wearing an indecently short skirt and leaning across the picnic table to reach something, and him unable to stop from pushing up behind her and lifting her skirt the rest of the way over her hips. The difference was that then they were enjoying a romantic dinner alone, and now they were surrounded by several other people. He was already plotting a way to get her alone for a few minutes.

It seemed like more people were arriving by the minute. School was out for the summer, and the access to a state of the art gym made Boulder, Colorado the destination of choice. Steven, Jake, Emily, and Beth were still training and needed a place to work out every day, and they got to spend time with their Olympic family during the evenings. It also helped that the Boulder residents all had houses big enough to house a few spares, so the boys, Beth and Andy, and Kelly had places to stay and people to cook for them.

By the time everybody arrived and brought various dishes, and Mark fired up the grill, there was more food than at Thanksgiving. The atmosphere was much more relaxed, though, and people ate whenever they wanted and wherever they wanted—standing, sitting, or moving from place to place. Alex was being passed around as much as any dish of food was.

Sasha was deep in conversation with Viola and Carmen about Jess's progress in her ballet class, and Becca's corresponding progress in her jazz class, when Payson came and took his hand. "No shop talk at a party," she admonished. "Now if you don't mind, I'm going to steal my boyfriend for a little while."

She pulled him a few feet away and stopped. "Did you need something?" he asked.

"Hmm, yes. I desperately needed you."

She kissed him, making sure that he knew she wanted more than a kiss. "Payson? Are you forgetting that we are surrounded by thirty of our closest friends?"

"Not forgetting," she said, kissing him again. "Not caring. It's the 4th of July, summer love and all that. Besides, most of the people here are halfway to drunk. They could care less what we do."

He accepted her lame reasoning because he wanted this as much as she did. He pulled her tighter against him and got lost in her, keeping only the thread of common sense that said he could not slide his hand below her waist.

They kissed for longer than they should have before she said, "Want to go somewhere?"

"Yes. But if we did, everybody would know what we were doing, and there are impressionable young girls here."

"Good point. I'm corrupting Beth already, I probably shouldn't corrupt Becca and Jess, too. I'll come up with something," she promised.

They split and returned to the party where, as Payson predicted, nobody seemed to care that they were just snogging in the middle of the crowded yard. Sasha put a tryst with Payson out of his mind for the time being, so he was surprised when she found a way for it to happen half an hour later.

"Hey Sasha," she called from her place among the other girls, "We want to go lay out on the pond. Will you help me pull in the rafts?"

The pond behind their property was bordering on the size of a lake and they had two large rafts that they used for laying out or fishing. They were roped to their dock and stayed floating in the middle of the pond most of the time, so whenever they wanted to use one they had to haul it back in. One person could do it, but it went much faster with two, making it a plausible excuse to get away. The fact that it was half a mile down their trail didn't hurt, either. They would have plenty of privacy and wouldn't have to rush.

Austin rolled his eyes at the excuse but didn't say anything, so Payson and Sasha set off toward the pond together. She didn't say much on the way down, or give any hint that they were going to do anything other than pull in the rafts, but Sasha wasn't fooled. He also wasn't the least bit surprised that she slipped off her knickers when they reached the grassy bank and tossed them onto the table they had situated a few meters from the waterside.

"You know, it has occurred to me that this dress might be too short. All you would have to do is lift it a…few…inches," she dragged her fingers across the fabric so that it slowly traveled those inches, "and I would be completely exposed."

"It's occurred to me, as well," he said, playing along with her game, "but I figured that you weren't in too much danger. After all, your leos don't cover much more than your knickers anyway."

"But now I'm not wearing any. What would I do if there was, say, a sudden gust of wind?"

"Then I might say it was serendipity and we should take full advantage of the opportunity." He grinned and closed the gap between them, bent on following his own advice and taking advantage of the opportunity.

o-O-o

Lauren waited until they were all changed into their bathing suits and in the middle of the pond on two tied together rafts before she said anything. "So, you and Sasha just had sex down here, huh?"

"Yep."

"Oh my gosh, stop saying stuff like that! I don't want to know it."

Andy ignored Emily's plea and sat up to look at Payson. "Seriously, you had sex out in the open like this? When all of your friends were back at your house? You have some serious balls, Pay."

"I don't, but Sasha does." Payson flashed an upside down grin, since she was lying with her head toward Lauren, Emily, and Andy's raft.

Kaylie scrunched up her face. "Ew."

"Oh come on, Kaylie, it's not like you didn't know Sasha has balls. He's a man, all men have them. Do I need to give you the birds and the bees talk?"

"I know he has them, Lo, but I would rather not think about that particular part of his body."

Payson snorted. "I started thinking about that particular part of his body about five or six hours after I met him. And let me tell you, reality ended up being so much better than my imagination."

"You're full of it," Lauren said. "You were totally sex clueless when he first came to the Rock. I'll buy you thinking about him a few months later, but not at the beginning."

"I was sex clueless," she admitted, "up until the day he showed up at the gym. It took me hours to connect the dots and realize what I was feeling. After that all it took was a little bit of, uh, experimentation to figure out the basics."

Lauren scrambled off her back to sit next to Andy and asked, "And you were thinking about him? What were you imagining?"

"What do you think? I was imagining having sex with him. Oddly, though, what sent me over the edge was when I imagined kissing him. I guess maybe the feelings were there already and I just didn't realize it." A wicked grin crossed her face and she sat up to face them. "Don't you want to know about the first time he thought about me?"

Lauren and Andrea said "yes" at the same time that Kaylie and Emily said "no." Lauren looked at Beth and Kelly and said, "Okay girls, it's up to you. Break the tie."

"I'm ambivalent," Kelly said, not bothering to look up from where she was lying in the sun, "but I'll throw a yes into the pool because it's fun to make you guys uncomfortable." Lauren saw through the façade. Kelly wasn't trying to make Kaylie and Emily uncomfortable; she really wanted to know but didn't want to admit it.

"Beth?"

"Yes."

Beth was so cute. She was always so curious about this kind of stuff, and it was like she was storing up knowledge for the day that she would need it. Payson was right; Beth was going to be a hellcat in bed when she found the right guy.

Beth sat up to face Payson, Kaylie and Emily tried to focus their attention anywhere else, and Kelly continued her act of indifference. Lauren started the story. "Okay, so first thing, when was it?"

"It was the day you guys did that Rock Rebel photo shoot. I tease him that he's a masochist because I totally bitched him out that day, but he says that I'm fiery when I'm mad and that was kind of the straw that broke the camel's back. He'd been trying not to think about me for a few days."

"Okay, so what started it a few days before?" Emily asked. She always said she didn't want to know, but then she always got roped in.

Payson rolled her eyes. "He's a guy, that's what. I worked out in my bra and it was the first time he'd seen me like that since, you know, my body changed. Apparently he has a thing for hips."

"Ew."

"Shut up Kaylie. Get back to that day. I'm assuming you're talking about the first time he got off thinking about you, right? So what was he thinking about?"

Payson fought down a laugh. "Well, he was _trying_ to think about Summer. He knew he shouldn't be thinking about me, so he hoped if he steered his mind in a different direction he might get over the attraction."

"Obviously that didn't work," said Andy.

"Obviously not," Payson agreed. "He told me that he couldn't get me out of his head so he gave up on the idea of Summer and kept telling himself that he was just picturing some made up woman."

"I hate myself for asking this," Emily said, "but what was he imagining you doing?"

"Giving him a blowjob, and then at some point he switched to us having sex. He kept trying to convince himself that it wasn't me, but he said my name when he came, so that sort of ruined the excuse."

"I remember that photo spread," Andy said, "And it was a really long time ago. He was thinking about you all that time?"

"Apparently, yeah, but he was living in total denial. Em, that time you caught us kissing at the Olympic Village, that was part of what it was about. He admitted that he thought about me and I could tell that he was beating himself up about it. He thought he was doing something so heinous."

"It's kind of crazy that you guys ended up together, don't you think?" Beth asked. "Back then, did you ever think that it might turn out this way?"

"Not even a little bit. That was the excuse I used whenever I fantasized about him, that it was never going to happen in real life so it didn't matter if I imagined it."

Andy took them all the way back to the original topic. "So you really just had sex down here? Why? I mean, you live together, it's not like you have to sneak around to find time together."

"We kind of do," Payson said. "Between work and family and Alex, we aren't alone very often. Alex is usually a good sleeper, but sometimes he wakes up before we finish, or sometimes we're so tired that we don't even try. Whenever we get an opportunity, we take it."

"So how often?" Emily's morbid curiosity was getting to her again.

"It depends on the situation. Sometimes every day, sometimes not for several days, but any of it seems low to us because before Alex was born we were having sex two or three times a day, _at least_."

"Wow," Lauren said. "Two or three times every day? I'm sore just thinking about that."

This cracked Payson up and Lauren splashed water on her to make her stop laughing. Some of the water hit Payson, but the majority of it landed on Kaylie's face, prompting her to retaliate. Within seconds they were in a full blown water fight, and shortly after that Andy became the first person to be pushed off the raft.

They didn't stop until they were too tired to stay afloat, then they hauled themselves back onto the rafts and laid around laughing.

"You know how Emily is always talking about those moments when we're the perfect team?" Lauren asked. "This is totally one of them." It didn't matter that the Olympics were over and they weren't competing anymore. On that day, soaking wet in the middle of the pond, they felt every bit as happy as they did standing on the podium.

A/N: Bonus points to anyone who figures out what story Payson was reading to Alex in the office.

So what's a guy to do when he's so in love with one woman that he can't love anyone else? Find a girl that's equally as damaged, of course. Austin and V have their own kind of happy ending. (If you don't know what I'm talking about, go read my fic Those Left Behind, which is a snapshot of Austin's future life.)

Pics on my pinterest of Payson's dress, shoes, and swimsuit for the 4th of July, and a picture of the nursing sports bra that Payson was working out in, because, as previously mentioned, I research everything. I spent a fair amount of time trying to figure out how Payson would nurse Alex if she was wearing a sports bra. I also have a rather embarrassing search history for the few days I wrote this section because I was looking up all the stuff about sex after giving birth.


	85. Chapter 85

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

A/N: A few things about pinterest: 1) I said last time that I was going to put 4th of July pics up and apparently forgot to do that. They're up now. 2) There are pics from this chapter up now, too, and Payson's dress and shoes are borrowed from my Paystin universe. She wore them on their first date. 3) I said last time that if you hadn't read Those Left Behind you might be confused about who the girl was in the _Amor Fati Universe-Extra Stuff_ board. Now you'll all be confused, because I added more pictures :) The entire Tucker/Belov family is now up on that board, following the kids all the way up into adulthood. Once I started doing this I learned a lot more about the universe that I didn't know before. It's funny how that happens.

Warning: Unrealistic plot line ahead.

* * *

><p>U.S. Gymnastics took the Olympics by storm, and now they were doing the same thing with the ESPYS. They were nominated in all the expected categories—Payson for Female Athlete, Championship Performance, Record Breaking Performance, and Female Olympian, Kelly for Female Olympian, and Austin for Male Athlete and Male Olympian—but there were a few that were unexpected, too. The women's team was nominated for Best Team and the men's team was nominated for Best Upset, both of which usually consisted only of major league sports, Lauren's standing ovation during the prelims was nominated for Best Moment, and Sasha was nominated for Best Coach, which was another category usually reserved for major league sports. Payson was expected to win several, much like Michael Phelps did after Beijing, but the others were less likely. It was surprising to be nominated in the first place.<p>

Sasha hated red carpet events, and the worst part of this one was that Payson looked bloody amazing. That shouldn't be a bad thing, but since they were still in the closet, so to speak, he had to behave himself and that was difficult to do with her looking like that. MJ told the stylist sexy but not slutty, and nothing that looked like a mom. The idea was to separate the image of Payson as a mom and Payson as a sex symbol. Mom-Payson got some face time on the cover of magazines all the time when she took Alex out about town, not to mention the well-publicized fact that Payson was flying in and out of LA on the same day so she wouldn't have to be apart from Alex overnight.

These things always felt like there was a loop of questions on repeat, and luckily very few of them were directed a Sasha. At a gymnastics event he was a big fish, but at the ESPYS he might as well be a guppy. Payson, unfortunately, was a big fish wherever she went, even at an event this prestigious. She kept walking and kept all her answers to three or four words thrown over her shoulder. "What is it like being a new mom?"—"It's absolutely amazing." "Where is Alex right now?"—"With his grandma." "How does it feel to be nominated for so many awards?"—"I'm completely honored." She answered them all like the pro that she was.

The gymnastics group made their way through the red carpet in as short a time possible. The others might have been bothered by the mad dash if they didn't care so much about Payson, but they understood that the moderate fame they enjoyed was nothing compared to the enormous pressure put on Payson, and they didn't resent her need to escape the media. They took their seats in the massive Nokia Theatre without even the smallest regret for missing out on the fanfare.

The event started out with an excruciatingly bad monologue filled with jokes that people pretended to laugh at. Their group really was laughing, but not at the host. Lauren and her boyfriend were tag teaming jokes at the host's expense, and everyone around them, including some in the rows in front of and behind them, were rolling with laughter.

On stage the wannabe comedian was talking about some of the best scores of the past year in various sports, and he ended with the punch line "But I think we all know who the real top scorer was this year, right? Austin Tucker for scoring with Payson Keeler."

Payson was in an outside seat since she was expected to win several awards, so there was plenty of room for one of the crew to get up and shove a camera in her face. What was expected was for her to shake her head and give an 'ah, shucks' laugh, but what she did was something that MJ would either love or hate. Payson looked straight into the camera and said, "Bite me."

There was a delay of a couple minutes while the host kept going with his monologue, but eventually someone on the production let him know what had just happened. He looked to the side like he was checking facts with someone just off stage and said, "Seriously? Payson Keeler really just said 'bite me'?"

The audience started applauding before the man could even make a joke, and much more than they had for any of his attempts at humor. Getting roasted by someone of equal caliber was one thing, but all the athletes were secretly narked when this moron insulted them in the name of comedy. Payson was speaking for the crowd.

The idiot kept going. "I can bite you if you want," he said, "but I thought that was Austin's job."

There were a few laughs and a few boos. It seemed that once they were on a roll most of them didn't want to stop, and the monologue didn't go well after that. The host got uncomfortable as his jokes failed to get the fake laughs that he was accustomed to. He looked glad to get off the stage at the end.

Austin was up for the first category, Best Male Athlete, so there was another camera up in their faces to watch his reaction when they announced the nominees and then the winner, who, unsurprisingly, was Michael Phelps. Austin was tied with Phelps and Payson for the biggest medal haul and would have had a real shot at the award if not for Phelps breaking the total medal record.

Next was Best Female Athlete, and Payson's unexpected rebel attitude last time she was on camera was replace by her normal charming smile, although she did refuse to look at the camera. She kept her eyes on the stage where a video montage was playing. When they announced her as the winner, she was able to pull off flattered sincerity, but didn't bother trying for surprise. It would have been fake and everybody would have known it. Nobody even considered that she might not win.

Her speech was much the same as it always was. She took the stage and hugged the celebritante handing her the statue and then said, "Thank you so much! I'm not sure I could ever thank all the people who got me here because the list is so huge, but I've got a start. The biggest thank you is to the fans for supporting me through everything, and then—sorry guys, but I really do have a list—mom, dad, and Becca for putting up with my single mindedness for thirteen years, Sasha for being the best coach in the world, Austin for being altogether amazing, Emily, Lauren, Kaylie, Kelly, Andy, and Beth for being such great teammates, Nicky, Steven, and Jake for being my surrogate big brothers, and Kevin for being a second dad. I love you all so much."

She exited the stage, where she was supposed to stick around for a few minutes and do backstage interviews, but Sasha knew that she would be in the wings of the stage waiting to hear the results of the next category—Best Moment, which Lauren was nominated for. She was up against Michael Phelps's nineteenth medal, but Payson insisted that Lauren was going to win. She campaigned hard for her friend, getting on twitter, facebook, and her official fan page to encourage people to vote, and using all of her considerable star power to influence the competition. That was what gave Lauren a fighting chance, because Payson was far more famous that Michael Phelps was. Phelps was an amazing athlete, but he just couldn't compete with someone as sexy as Payson.

When the announcer called Lauren's name she really was surprised. Even with Payson's help, it was hard to beat someone breaking a forty eight year old record. She climbed the stage with tears in her eyes.

"Wow," she said. "This is so amazing, I don't know what to say. How about ditto to everything Payson just said? We really do have the exact same people to thank, so thank you to all of them, and a few in particular. The biggest one is the fans, because you're the ones who give us the strength to do what we do, and my dad who is my biggest fan of all, to Chloe for being my mom even though I was a complete brat to you when you and my dad first started dating, and to Payson. She's the reason that I'm up here in so many ways, starting with the fact that she's the one who got people to vote for me." She let people laugh at the joke and then looked off stage at Payson and continued, "Pay, that routine was for you. You inspire me every day with your strength, your courage, and your kindness. I am honored to be your friend."

Lauren hurried off stage—straight into Payson's arms, he was sure—and the show moved on to the next award, which they were also nominated for. They had nominations in eight of the first eleven categories, so they were in a constant state of anticipation. Best Team was another unlikely nomination, but the Fantastic Five, as they were being called, were America's darlings, and they might be able to pull off a win like the U.S. Women's Soccer Team did in 2000.

The presenter for the Team award was some Australian comedian named Rebel Wilson who was a hell of a lot funnier than the show's host. With her deadpanned lines, perfect amount of physical comedy, and willingness to make fun of her own weight while she discussed her search for the perfect sport, she was the most entertaining person they were likely to see all night.

"See, first I thought about doing basketball, but every time I jumped my boobs"—she lifted her breasts to demonstrate her point—"would bounce up and hit me in the face. Once I poked myself in the eye with my nipple, and after that they kicked me off the pee wee team." She paused just the perfect amount of time for the audience to laugh and then moved on.

"So next I tried gymnastics, and I was really really good at it, look"—she tried to slide into the splits but got stuck long before she reached the floor and had to have her co-presenter pull her back up—"I thought I could go to the Olympics, you know? So I was getting really excited until I got on those bar things—you know, the ones they swing on so that they're upside down"—she bent sideways to demonstrate—"but I never got to go upside down because the bar broke. I fell on my ass and my mum had to pay a lot of money to replace it—the bar, not my ass."

"But after that I found the right sport for me. Rugby—that's like American football except it's a real sport—is so great because I'm allowed to beat people up. And there's basically no rules, so I can bring weapons if I want to, or if I don't happen to have a Billy Club with me I can just sit on them. Sometimes I bite people too, or fart in their face. Yeah… it's a really great sport."

The other presenter looked like he didn't know how to follow that, so he stumbled a bit reading out the winner—the U.S. Women's Gymnastics Team.

Sasha was blown away that his team had won not just one but two of the long shot categories they were nominated in, first Lauren and now as a team. He was so proud of his girls as he walked with Kaylie, Kelly, and Emily to accept the award, while Payson and Lauren joined them from backstage. There was a round of hugs and handshakes from the presenters, and Rebel Wilson made sure that she was close to the microphone when she asked Payson, "Can I bite you?"

Anyone watching on the tele who missed the beginning of the show was probably very confused, but Payson laughed and said, "Sure, why not?"

"Oh, this is awkward," the comedian said, her poker face flawless. "I thought you would say no, and now I'm not really sure how to get out of the situation."

"You could bite him instead," Payson suggested, pointing at Sasha.

"I better not," Rebel said. "My parole officer says that I'm not allowed to bite any more men before my hearing."

She left and they let Emily accept the award for them as team captain. She gave an emotional speech and they all headed backstage, where Payson and Lauren were finally able to give their post-win interviews. Onstage they were awarding for Best Coach, but Sasha didn't win, nor did he expect to.

They got back to their seats just before they announced the award for Best Championship Performance, one of the categories Payson won the year before. She wasn't at that ceremony because she was preparing for the Olympics (and at that time reeling from the news of her pregnancy), but she won three awards based on her four gold medals, one silver, and one bronze at the 2011 World Championships—Championship Performance, Breakthrough Athlete, and Comeback of the Year. She was head to head with Michael Phelps this year, but most thought she would take this category because of the challenges she faced during the Olympics, and Michael Phelps would take Best Record Breaking Performance, the other award they were both up for.

When they announced her name this time she was surprised, because even though she knew she had a shot, she was going up against an Olympic legend. She didn't expect to lose, but she didn't expect to win either.

Her speech was different this time. "You've heard all of my big 'thank you's," she said, "but I think it's time that I thank some people behind the scenes who I haven't given enough recognition to. A lot of you know that I _hate_ talking about my health, but my doctors really deserve to be thanked. I had a team of doctors in Boulder and London who really went above and beyond to keep me healthy enough to compete, and I owe my medals and my life to them. So thank you so much to all of you who took care of me then and continue to take care of me now."

They asked her about it when she got back to her seat after the awards for Best Play and Best Upset—which the men were nominated for but did not win. She said that she couldn't give the same speech over again, so she was trying to get creative.

Payson was one of the loudest cheerers when Missy Franklin won the next category, Best Breakthrough Athlete. "She reminds me of myself when I was younger," she explained once, and Sasha thought that was hilarious. Missy was only one year younger than Payson, but he did understand the sentiment. Missy still had the innocence of youth, and Payson was forced to give that up a long time ago when she broke her back.

The next award was Best Record Breaking Performance, which the media was trumping up as another Keeler/Phelps showdown, but none of the gymnastics group took that seriously. Michael Phelps broke the biggest record of all time. He would be the winner hands down.

The cameras flashed shots of all five of the nominees on the stage screen, but as they drew close to the announcement the screen settled into a split shot of Payson and Phelps, watching for their reactions.

"The fans have spoken," the announcer said, the standard ESPY line, "and the ESPY goes to… Payson Keeler!"

That split screen image got better reactions than they could have hoped for, because Payson's face was full of open shock, and Phelps's face was a mask of barely concealed shock. Sasha had obviously underestimated the power of celebrity. Phelps might have broken the biggest record of all time, but he wasn't as famous as Payson. People admired Michael Phelps. The same people and a whole lot more either wanted to be Payson or wanted to sleep with her.

Once she got over her obvious shock, she took the stage for a fourth time and said, "This one is dedicated to my first coach, Sam Cobb. When I was four years old I watched the Magnificent Seven win in Atlanta, and the next day I went to my tumble tots class and told Coach Cobb that I wanted to be Shannon Miller when I grew up. Instead of patting my head and brushing me off as some silly little kid he said, 'Well, the first step is reaching level three. Let's get started.' He coached me into the elites, and when I got scouted by the Rock he was the first one to tell my parents that I should go. When I saw him at Christmas five years ago he said"—she paused as her voice tightened with emotion. Getting emotional in public was something she tried to avoid outside of the podium, which is why she never talked about her old coach in interviews. She continued, "He said 'make me proud, kid.' He passed away two months after that so he never got to see me compete as a senior, but I really hope I made you proud, Coach."

Payson talking to her dead coach would probably be in the papers tomorrow as one of the most memorable moments of the night, as would her 'bite me' invective earlier in the evening. There couldn't be a more drastic contrast between the two statements.

The rest of the ceremony was largely uneventful since the other categories were related to sports that none of them watched, but there were two more important awards for them. Best Male and Female Olympians were awarded toward the end of the night, and they both went to the most expected people: Michael Phelps and Payson Keeler. Payson's last speech of the night would be quoted by gymnastics coaches for years to come.

"This is for all the little kids who watched us on TV last summer and started dreaming. I was that kid once. We all were, and there are some things that every kid on this path should know. The life that we've chosen is hard. You're going to get hurt physically, you're going to get hurt emotionally, and you're going to want to quit a million times. There are going to be people who stand in your way and try to push you down. You're going to have to fight. But I'm standing here as an Olympic Champion telling you that it's worth it, not because of the medals but because of who you're going to become. If you chase your dreams you're going to learn discipline and hard work, you're going to learn when to stand on your own and when to lean on others, you're going to learn how to love something with your whole heart, and, most importantly, you're going to be happy. You're going to be so incredibly happy because you get a chance to do what you love every day. People like us, we have sports in our soul. We don't do this to win. We do it because it's part of who we are."

o-O-o

It was so late when they got home that it could almost be considered early morning. Payson was exhausted, but that didn't stop her from bounding up the stairs to check on her baby. Alex was in good hands with his grandparents, but Payson needed to see him for the same irrational reason that she needed her parents to sleep at her house rather than taking Alex to sleep at theirs. It was unnecessary fretting, but Sasha didn't point that out because he had the exact same irrational need to have Alex close. The only reason he wasn't bounding up the stairs himself was because he knew that too many people at once would wake Alex.

He opened the door to one of their several trophy cases and placed Payson's four new ESPY trophies near the three that she won last year. The awards last year were barely noticed because she won just days after she discovered her pregnancy, and by the time they were shipped to her in Boulder she was caught up in the beginnings of her illness. They were just three more trophies among dozens of others, but this year was special because she was at the ceremony. She was there to give her acceptance speeches and to hear thousands of people applauding her, and there to experience the surprise of unexpected wins. It meant a lot to her to be chosen by the fans because it wasn't that long ago that people were decrying her as a bad influence. It was good to know that her reputation had recovered to the point that so many people would vote for her.

Alex wasn't with her when she came downstairs and she explained, "Austin has him right now. It's pretty adorable, Austin in his Armani holding Alex in his monkey jammies. I snapped a picture."

Sasha cross to her and slinked his arms around her waist. "I'm so proud of you," he said. "Now that you've won all of these, maybe you'll believe me when I tell you how extraordinary you are."

"I'm not extraordinary, Sasha. I know that I've done extraordinary things, but there's nothing special about me except the people I'm surrounded by."

She would never understand her greatness. She knew that she was important to the sport, but she didn't have a concept of _how_ important she was, and he doubted that she would ever realize the full extent of her talent. She had blinders on; he remembered one evening that she was frustrated with herself for not mastering a two and a half twist over the course of the training session, and then the next day she worked on the same pass with Jess and, with complete sincerity, told her to relax because nobody learned a skill in a single day.

"I wish I could make you see what I see in you," he said.

"I think we've had this conversation before. Weren't you going to commission a painting of me or something?" she teased. He'd forgotten about that night, when they first admitted their attraction for one another and he compared her to a Degas painting. Looking back, they were blind not to realize their love.

"Maybe I'll still do that, but I wasn't talking about how beautiful you are. I was talking about how talented you are, and how kind, and how brave, and all of the other things that make you who you are. You're amazing, Payson."

She shook her head and said, "_You're_ amazing. You amaze me every day, and I am so glad to have you."

"Are we about to start an 'I love you more' tête-à-tête here?"

She laughed at his joke, but neither of them admitted how close to the truth it was. They were already one of the cheesiest couples in history. They didn't need to make it any worse.

"Come on, let's go upstairs," he said. "I haven't seen Alex yet."

Payson described Austin and Alex together as adorable. Sasha wouldn't go quite that far, but the sight of Austin wearing a suit while he sat in a rocking chair with a baby in his arms—in monkey pajamas, as Payson pointed out—was definitely picture worthy. He wouldn't be surprised if Payson tweeted the photo.

Austin kissed Payson goodnight but handed Alex to Sasha rather than to her. They joked about taking turns with the baby, and Payson had already taken her turn.

Sasha sat in the abandoned rocking chair and cradled Alex in his arms. He was still amazed by this tiny creature. No matter what went wrong or how bad a day had been, Alex could make it better with a single smile. There was so much of Payson in him. Her smile could make things better, too.

Sasha remembered a time when Payson's smile was hard to find. When he first came to the Rock she was so serious, so focused on her goal of Olympic gold that she wasn't living her life. The first time he saw her really smile was at the Rock's fashion show. He was lucky enough to watch as, little by little, she broke down her walls and that smile made more frequent appearances. Now, with someone as wonderful as Alex to make her happy, it was rare that she _didn't_ smile.

While Sasha cradled Alex, Payson slithered out of her skin tight dress. The action should have been sexy, but the affect was ruined by her less than attractive underclothes. According to Payson, and her stylist agreed, she did not have the body to wear a dress like that yet. Sasha thought they were both bonkers and that she looked bloody amazing, but he wasn't allowed an opinion on clothes. She wore Spanx—s-p-a-n-x, not s-p-a-n-k-s, she informed him—which looked great underneath the dress and ridiculous when she took the dress off. He made the joke that would probably get him in trouble: "All I've been able to think about all night was getting you out of that dress, but now that you're out of it, it's a bit of a turn-off."

"Yeah, well you can be turned off all you want, but I don't want to be on the wrong side of the best and worst lists for all the fashion blogs tomorrow. Besides, it doesn't matter if the Spanx kill the mood, because I am way too tired to have sex."

"I don't think you need to worry about the fashion blogs, love. I think you should worry more about what the gossip rags will have to say about your 'bite me' invective earlier tonight."

"Oh, come on, you know I wasn't the only one thinking it. Everyone hates those stupid jokes." As she said it, she crossed the room to put away her jewelry. Sasha took that as an excuse to change the subject rather than agreeing with her, which she would take as the joke that it was. Sometimes he made a point out of not admitting that she was right about something.

"I've been having fantasies about making love while you have those on," he said, indicating the diamond cuffs that she was putting back in her jewelry cabinet. "One of these days we're going to make that happen."

"Love, if I wasn't so tired we'd make it happen right now. Unfortunately, we'll have to wait until another time for you to get your rocks off thinking about me in shackles."

"I am not thinking about you in shackles!" he protested. "All I was thinking is that you look very sexy wearing them."

"Yeah, because I look like I'm wearing diamond incrusted shackles. Let me guess, you're the king and I'm your nubile young slave forced to obey your every command. Did I get that right?"

Now that she mentioned it, those cuffs did have a certain bondage look to them, but that wasn't where his head was when he made the suggestion—not that he was aware of, at least. He could see the appeal in the scenario she was painting with her joke, though. "I was not thinking about that," he insisted again, "but I like your idea. Let's play that game."

She slipped one of his t-shirts over her head and moved to sit on the bed. "As long as we can switch it up one night and let me be the queen while _you_ are the nubile young slave. But for now, King Sasha, put the prince to bed and come cuddle with your slave girl."

He settled Alex in his crib and stripped down to his boxers, leaving his clothes in a pile that Payson, for once, didn't protest. She would be cranky about it in the morning, but she was going to be cranky no matter what because she didn't shower or take off her makeup. For now she was just too tired to care. He slid into bed next to her and let her drape herself on top of him, already falling into the sleep that she needed.

Just before she surrendered to sleep, she snuggled into Sasha and whispered, "This was a really good night."

o-O-o

There were camera crews camped out at the hotel that was booked for the Secret U.S. Classics, waiting to catch the arriving athletes. Some girls were ignored, the way Emily was when she showed up at her first Nationals, and some were singled out for interviews with gymnastics magazines and websites. A select few were interviewed by NBC Universal. And then there was the Rock team.

They were swamped the moment they walked through the door. A lot of attention was directed to Becca and Jess, who were being touted as up-and-coming stars, and overwhelming amounts of it were aimed at Payson. Austin got a fair share of attention by merit of being one of the most decorated men in history and his connection to Payson, and Sasha by merit of having coached the greatest team America had ever seen. MJ had given a media lesson to all of the Rock girls before they came, so nobody was saying anything they shouldn't.

Payson made sure to say her response loud enough for several reporters to hear at once so that she had to repeat it fewer times. Every time someone shoved a microphone in her face she said, "I'm sorry, but I need to get my son settled right now. I'd be glad to speak with you later."

Alex was being shielded from the chaos as much as possible. Payson put baby ear plugs in his ears before they left the van, and the canopy on his carrier seat was pulled over his face as far as it would go. The sights and sounds of a media frenzy were enough to overwhelm adults, much less an infant.

Those who were used to the attention led the way for those who weren't, helping them navigate the maze of reporters, and got them checked into their rooms. The elevator was like a sanctuary from the insanity outside, but unfortunately Sasha had to wait quite a while before he could get on it.

The Rock came with a huge group, because all four of Sasha's seniors and all five of Payson's juniors qualified to the Classic, and they all had family with them. Payson and Austin were in the first elevator up because they needed to get Alex settled for a nap, but Sasha had to wait until all of the thirty five people associated with the Rock were headed up before he could join them. He was a tad jealous of Payson for getting to skip the chaos of check in.

Tara and Jake were both helping run the show, and Sasha couldn't have done it without them. They handed out keys and directed people to their rooms until, one by one, everybody found their destinations. The process was much easier when the gymnasts and families were experienced, but seven of their nine athletes had never been to a major national competition before. They were 'Classic Virgins,' as Payson called them. She insisted the term was in use long before she came to the Rock, and Sasha didn't believe her until he heard one of the senior girls use it in casual conversation.

When everyone was sorted out Sasha went to the room he was sharing with Payson to change. They were leaving again in half an hour for practice, but at least this time they were leaving the families behind. As gym manager, Kim had to deal with the families the entire time they were there, but Sasha got to forget about them after the initial rush. They were staying on the opposite wing and wouldn't be allowed at practices, so all Sasha had to do was manage was the athletes, and that was more than enough.

Alex was already asleep in his play yard when Sasha reached their room. He had a rough day. He didn't like the airplane (and who could blame him) and cried for most of the three hours they were in the air, so he missed his morning nap and finally fell asleep out of pure exhaustion when they landed. Sasha expected a rough night, too, because it was Alex's first night away from home and there was a two hour time difference between Colorado and North Carolina. They wanted to keep his normal schedule as much as possible, but some concessions had to be made. They couldn't start the day at three thirty in the morning, which is when Alex's little body would probably tell him to wake up, so it was going to be a game of trial and error for the next few days.

Payson was busy converting the desk into a changing station and Austin was nowhere in sight. Sasha took advantage of the temporary privacy to press against Payson's back and slide his arms around her waist. He kissed her neck and asked, "Miss it?"

"Immensely," she said. She leaned back into his chest and sighed. "You know, I was thinking about it and the Classic was the last normal event I competed at. I was a mess at Nationals and Trials, and then the Olympics were all kinds of complicated. I feel like I've come full circle, back here but with a new kind of normal."

"You know what I've been thinking about?" he asked her. She shook her head no. "I was thinking that it was exactly a year ago today when we landed in London."

"Oh my God, you're right. I can't believe it's been that long. It seems like yesterday that I found out about Alex, and it's been more than a year already."

"Do you want to go back to London some day?" he asked.

"Definitely." She looked up at him from over her shoulder and he leaned down to kiss her—and someone knocked on the door. Payson swore under her breath and then called, "It's open, Austin."

Austin came in and flopped down on the bed. It wasn't that Austin didn't know he just interrupted something; he knew and didn't care that he was ruining their moment. They had gotten far too comfortable living together.

"Shouldn't you two have coachy things to do?" he asked.

Payson went back to her original task of sitting out various baby necessities. "We have about fifteen more minutes of _no_ coachy things," she said, "before we're out of here and you have fathery things to do."

They could have left Alex at home with Austin, which nobody was comfortable with, or they could have brought him to Charlotte while Austin stayed in Boulder, which nobody was comfortable with either. If they were at an in and out competition like and invitational it might have been different, but none of them wanted to be separated from Alex for four days. The solution was that Austin would come with them and care for Alex while Payson and Sasha were working.

Payson finished arranging the temporary changing table and then turned to Austin. "Let him sleep himself out and then bring him over to the practice gym so I can nurse him. You should be able to get a car out back so he doesn't have to go through the crowds again, but I packed some more earplugs just in case. If you do end up having to pass the photographers then put the canopy down on his carseat or put on his sunglasses to block out the flashes. If he's fussy when he wakes up give him—"

"Payson," Austin said, cutting her off and resting his hands on her shoulders to calm her. "Relax. You're leaving him for an hour, not a week. He will be fine."

She pouted. It was a familiar sight, because she did it every time someone called her out on her overprotective micromanaging. "But he's in a strange place," she reasoned, "and he's never been around reporters before. He could get scared."

"If he gets scared then I will be here to make him feel safe again. It's part of the job description. You can look it up. It'll say 'Dad—the person who scares away monsters and reporters.'"

That made Payson laugh and she collapsed into Austin's arms. She had her head buried against Austin's chest, so Sasha could barely hear her muffled "What would I do without you?"

"I have no idea," Austin teased. "Now get ready for practice, Coach Keeler. You have work to do."

Payson and Sasha both changed into their Rock clothes, which for Payson was a pair of jeans and a specially made nursing vest that had a Rock logo on the front. Sasha never realized before that you could have nearly anything specially made. Then they left Austin alone with Alex (Sasha had to drag Payson away) and went to gather their charges, but before they loaded into the bus Payson surprised Sasha by whispering, "When we get back from practice I expect you to finish what you started up there."

He whispered back, "Love, I'll finish it and then start it again."

That set the tone for practice. The rest of the day was filled with charged tension, to the point that Sasha was shocked that nobody seemed to notice. If Lauren was there she would have said that he and Payson were having eye sex, and they weren't being subtle about it. They hadn't come forward with their relationship yet, but anyone bothering to look could figure it out from the way they were looking at each other.

When Austin showed up a couple of hours later with a very unhappy baby, Payson amazed them all with her ability to multitask. She calmed Alex down enough that he would nurse, which in turn calmed him down a lot more, and then continued to coach while he fed. The girls from the Rock were used to this, because she nursed him out on the floor quite often back home, but they were surrounded by fifty or so other gymnasts who were surprised to see Payson walking around the gym with a silk scarf wrapped around her while she breastfed her son. And through it all she continued to send smoldering looks toward Sasha.

Their girls were amazing during practice, but most of Sasha's thoughts were back in their hotel room where he could live up to the promise he made Payson. He was thankful when all of the gymnasts started to pack up and head out of the gym. He barely tasted his dinner because he was so anxious to be alone with Payson.

When they reached the hotel and saw all of the girls back to their rooms with strict instructions to rest, Austin took Alex from Payson's arms. She protested but he said, "I'm not an idiot, Payson. I know exactly what you and Sasha are going to be doing in there, and I'd rather my son not be around to witness it. He can stay with me for a little while."

Payson's agreement was conditional. "Fine, but he's still sleeping in our room tonight. I know what you said about making him feel safe, but since you don't have breasts with milk in them, your ability to comfort him during the night is somewhat limited. Besides, the Pack 'n Play is already set up in our room."

Austin ignored Payson's bizarre reasoning and said, "Okay, I'll bring him back in a couple of hours, just promise me that you're not going to be doing anything that would be awkward to interrupt."

"Better make it three hours, then," Sasha said, pulling Payson through the door and leaving an exasperated Austin behind. He dismissed all thoughts of Austin and pushed Payson up against the wall by the door. From the way she responded, she already forgot about Austin, too.

It was a rare time of total privacy for them, so they made good use of every second. Sasha didn't want it to end, so he was frustrated when he heard a knock on the door a full thirty minutes before Austin was due back.

"I'm going to kill him," he muttered.

He got up and pulled on his jeans, but he didn't bother to put on a shirt. Austin said he didn't want to interrupt anything awkward, so he bloody well shouldn't have shown up early. Sasha wasn't going to make it any easier on him. Payson wasn't either, because she didn't get up or put clothes on. She was going to make it perfectly clear what Austin was interrupting.

Sasha swung open the door and said, "It has not been thr—"

He stopped, because it wasn't Austin on the other side of the door. It was Marty, who now had a clear view of Payson lying naked in their bed. Thank god she was covered with a sheet.

Marty's head swung back and forth between Sasha and Payson until finally he sputtered, "What the hell is going on here?"

It was the wrong thing to say, because it knocked Payson out of embarrassed and into defensive, and a defensive Payson tended to say very bad things. "Did you never get the birds and the bees talk, Marty? Do we need to draw you a diagram?"

Marty managed a few coherent words. "You!... and you!... You're…"

"Well we were until you interrupted us," Payson said. Sasha snickered. "I'm sure you can understand why I'm not all that comfortable being naked right now, Marty, so could you step out into the hall for a minute while I dress? I promise that you can come in when I'm done and throw your tantrum."

Marty was too horrified to protest the word 'tantrum,' so he walked out the door and Sasha slammed it shut behind him. Then he turned to Payson and said, "Did you have to do that, love?"

"Yes."

For some reason he was fine with that answer. He searched out his shirt and waited for Payson to re-dress before he opened the door again. Marty was standing outside, half catatonic, and he walked toward them like a zombie, pausing just inside the doorframe like he was too disturbed to come in. Payson was the first person to speak. "Really, Marty, are you just now figuring this out?"

"_Just now?_" he cried. "How long has this been going on?"

Sasha shrugged. "Coming up on seven months."

"Seven months… so when you kept insisting that there was nothing going on between you and her, you were lying?"

Payson cut Sasha off before he could even answer. "No. There wasn't anything going on back then. I was with Austin. Don't cheapen what he and I had together by suggesting that anything was going on with Sasha at the same time."

There was enough venom in Payson's words to reduce Marty to a kindergartener in trouble with his teacher. He muttered an apology.

Payson walked forward and took Sasha's hand in her own. "There's nothing untoward going on here, Marty. We're both adults and we love each other. Austin and I were over long before anything happened with Sasha. If Austin doesn't have a problem with this relationship then nobody else should, either."

Marty turned a shocked look on Sasha. "She's your _gymnast_."

Sasha understood what he meant. Marty viewed Payson the same way that Sasha viewed Kaylie, Emily, and Lauren, and in that light the relationship was heinous, but Payson was different than the other girls. He told Marty, "It was different for us from the start and you know it. It was always a partnership. We were equals, and that changed the way we worked together."

"I was a kid when I worked with you, Marty," Payson said. "I did everything you said and never asked questions, but I wasn't like that with Sasha. I wasn't a kid anymore and I didn't follow him blindly. I fought him from day one and _made_ him see me as an adult. I'm not the girl that you remember and I haven't been for a long time."

Marty looked at Payson again. "You could do so much better than him, Payson." Sasha wanted to be angry but he understood what Marty meant there, too. Sasha had a spotty past, and more of those spots were dirty than clean.

"No I can't," Payson insisted. "He's not perfect, but we're right for each other. You can't see it because you're stuck on the idea of me as a little girl, but ask someone else and they'll tell you that we just fit together. Talk to Kevin."

As usual, Austin had impeccable timing. He came out of his room across the hall carrying his son and an ice bucket, and he stopped dead in his tracks at the sight of the three people standing just inside the open door. "Uhh… what am I interrupting?"

"Nothing," Marty mumbled, and then took off toward the elevators. He was headed either to his room a couple of floors above or the bar downstairs.

Payson didn't seem to mind the abrupt exit. She moved forward and took Alex into her arms like everything was normal. While she asked Alex if he had fun with his daddy and interpreted his babbling as answers, Austin asked, "Why was Marty here?"

"Huh," Sasha said. "I don't actually know."

o-O-o

It was the first night at a major competition, and it had become a tradition that Marty and Sasha go have a beer and heckle each other about old times before they went back to semi-hating each other. So when he knocked on Sasha's door that was what he expected: a beer and a few jokes at his expense. What he did not expect was to see Payson lying in the bed, clearly having just… just…

What happened to the Payson he coached for four years? She was quiet and reserved and didn't care about anything but gymnastics. She didn't think about sex, she didn't joke about sex, and she sure as hell didn't _have_ sex, so how did she turn into someone who would get caught in an older man's bed and make jokes about it?

He knew that she was different than she used to be, but he tried to brush it off as a product of her illness. Being on the brink of death had changed her, and it had led to some bad decisions that ended in her pregnancy. He didn't know how to justify the changes he saw during the year before the Olympics when she suddenly poured emotion into her routines, laughed more, and walked down a red carpet with confidence. His Payson would never have done those things, but that was the problem. Now she was Sasha's Payson, in more ways than one.

A coach sleeping with one of his gymnasts was wrong. It was a violation of… of everything. There was no way to justify what Sasha was doing. It didn't matter that Sasha was only thirty three and Payson was nearly nineteen. It didn't matter that she was sixteen when Sasha met her instead of twelve like she was when Marty met her. It was still wrong. Sasha mentioned once that the first time he noticed Payson was when she competed at Junior Nationals when she was eleven. _Eleven. _The passage of eight years did not make it okay for him to sleep with her.

Payson said to talk to Kevin, so that must mean he knew. Marty couldn't imagine that he was okay with this. He had daughters Payson's age, and he was a coach himself. He understood the boundaries. Marty didn't know what Kevin could possibly say to make this seem okay, but the only way he was going to find out was to call him like Payson suggested.

He dug out his phone and pulled up Kevin in his contacts. The other coach answered after two rings with "Hi Marty. What can I do for you?"

Marty didn't bother with a polite response. He said, "Payson and Sasha."

"Alright." There was a pause on the other end of the line. "Are you going to give me any more than that? Because I'm not following your train of thought."

"How long have you known about them?"

There was confusion in Kevin's voice. "About a week or two after it happened, I guess. Why do you want to know?"

"Are you seriously _okay_ with this? He's her coach!" Was Marty the only person who understood why this was so wrong?

Kevin didn't answer. Instead he asked, "Are you just now finding out? I thought you would have known months ago."

"No, apparently I'm not high enough on the list for that. I didn't get told. I had to find out by catching Payson in his bed."

"Ooh," Kevin hissed, a universal sign of horrified empathy. "That's a horrible way to find out something like that about a girl you coached when she was young."

"So why did you rank high enough to be told so soon?" Marty asked. He tried not to sound bitter, because that was not the primary reason for this call. It didn't matter that Kevin got told and Marty didn't, or at least that's what he told himself.

"Laura and I are godparents for Alex," Kevin explained. "We've spent a couple of weekends at their house, so it would have been hard to hide it from us. I'd been expecting it for a while, though, so it didn't come as a shock."

"You haven't answered my question. How are you okay with this? Sasha is her coach."

He could hear the confusion in the silence, even though that didn't make sense. It took Kevin a minute to answer, but when he did it was surprising. "Have you seen them?"

"Of course I saw them. I just left their room." He shuddered at the thought of that hotel room being 'theirs.'

"No, that's not what I meant," Kevin said. "I mean have you ever just watched them whenever they're in a room together? Paid attention to the way they act around each other?"

Marty still wasn't following. "Yeah, I've watched them, and what I've seen is that they're totally inappropriate with each other."

"Well then you've got your eyes closed," Kevin said, reprobation clear in his voice. "Or maybe I just see it different because I'm married and I know what to look for. They're made for each other."

"You can't seriously believe that, Kevin. _Made_ for each other? That's fairy tale crap."

He had offended Kevin. "I believe that Laura is the one person in this entire world that I want to spend my life with," he said, managing to counter the sappy statement with his anger, "and I believe that Payson is like that for Sasha. You've known him for even longer than I have, so you know how much he's changed. I could tell from day one that Payson was the reason for that."

Marty had noticed the change in Sasha, but he never really attributed it to Payson. He thought maybe a combination of age and coaching again had tamed him, worn down the aggression of his younger days. At the most he thought the girls as a group had opened him up a bit. It never occurred to him that Payson had been the reason for the change, and if she was… that meant that Sasha felt that way about her from the beginning.

"I'm still not okay with this," he said. "I don't care how much Payson has changed him, he's still her coach. He crossed a line."

"You don't have to be okay with it," Kevin said. "It's not your decision to make. You have to learn to live with it."

Marty wasn't sure that was possible.

* * *

><p>AN: I don't think I've ever had so many unfinished fics on my computer before. There are two unfinished smut outtakes—one for the fourth of July and one for after the ESPYs, and then an unfinished scene from AF that needs to be written in the next day or two, an unfinished outtake about Lilah (who is my new favorite Belov), the very _very_ unfinished sequel to AF, and my unfinished Paystin universe. Then there are the two big ones—Mother Knows Best and Cat and Mouse. Mother Knows Best is next on the list when I get this story finished up in a week or less. Cat and Mouse may never be finished, I'm not sure. It depends on where the inspiration hits.


	86. Chapter 86

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

A/N: It's so much fun to screw with Summer.

* * *

><p>The day of the Classic was filled with nervous anticipation. For most of the Rock girls this was the biggest competition they had ever been to, and it was the qualifier for Nationals, which was the ultimate goal for a lot of gymnasts. There was a very select group of girls who were on the radar for a Worlds team, much less the Olympics, so competing at Nationals would be the highlight of some of these girls' careers.<p>

Sasha wasn't on the floor for the junior competition. They wanted to make it clear that Payson was the coach, not Sasha, so he hung back with the seniors and walked them through pre-competition practice. He didn't get to watch, but he heard the whispers threading their way around the Time Warner Cable Areana. There was a coup taking place, and it was headed up by Jess Torres. She was in second place going into the final rotation, knocking some of the more experienced girls down a peg.

He let the seniors move out of the warm up rooms and huddle in one of the tunnels to watch the last rotation, because in a lot of ways Becca and Jess's performances were more important to them than their own. They were competing for college scholarships, but Jess was Olympic-bound and Becca was at the very least going to be on the National team. It was an honor to be training at the same gym as them.

They were on beam, Becca's best event and the one on which Jess would debut her new skill, a quarter turn flic flac into a hip circle. Jess was frustrated to be doing the quarter turn. She was still working her way up to the ultimate one and a quarter turn, but right now she had the three quarter down cold and the competitor in her wanted to do it. It would catapult her into first place, but Payson insisted she wait. The idea was to get the skill named as a Torres, and the first opportunity for that to happen was at the Youth Olympic Games the next year. It was inevitable that someone would try to steal the move for the World Championships in October, and no matter how unlikely it was that they would pull it off, Payson didn't want to take the chance. Jess would debut the three quarter at the Junior Pan Am and the one and a quarter at the Pacific Rim Championships.

The event went much as planned. Becca ended up in third place on the beam and seventh overall, Jess got first on vault, second on beam, and fourth on bars and floor with a silver in the All Around, and all five of the Rock athletes qualified to Nationals. Payson's reputation as a coach got bigger still.

Jess was disappointed with the second place finish, but nobody outside of those closest to her would notice. She wanted gold, and no matter how many times Payson told her that the silver was better for her right now, she was too competitive to be okay with it. Sasha tried to imagine Payson's reaction if someone told her when she was younger that she needed the silver rather than the gold. That conversation would not have gone well.

She was right, though. Jess was twelve years old with three years to go before the Olympics. She could not peak early, nor could she give the impression of having peaked. The rest of the world needed to see her grow every year so that they would be intimidated as hell when 2016 rolled around.

After the medal ceremony, there was a flurry of hugs between the juniors and seniors, and Sasha held Payson longer than he probably should have in public. They wouldn't be hiding their relationship too much longer, at least not from those at the Rock. They would come clean after Nationals, when there was no major competition to distract from.

Payson moved to the stands for the senior competition and, as was becoming the norm, the cameras spent more time on her than they did on the athletes. Not only did it annoy Payson, but it was bad for her image for her to be stealing the spotlight from others, so MJ personally spoke with the video coordinator from NBC Universal and asked them to cut back the amount of time that they aired Payson on the JumboTron. Perhaps they did, but it wasn't by much. Anytime there was a lag in the important gymnasts competing, they cut to footage of Payson in the stands with Alex, Austin, and the other 2012 girls. Right now Emily, Payson, and Austin were making utter fools of themselves playing with Alex, but acting crazy was acceptable with babies.

The seniors from the gym didn't have the kind of success that Becca and Jess had, but they all qualified to Nationals, which was the only thing that mattered for them at the moment. Nationals meant college scouts, which meant scholarships.

The post-Olympic year was a notorious low point in gymnastics and the Rock came back with a vengeance. A team like Payson, Emily, Lauren, and Kaylie was once in a lifetime, but the gym would move on, and it looked like it would happen in a big way.

Their celebration, like all since London, was rowdy. Most of the gymnasts went to celebrate with their families, but the Keelers, Team 2012, and Jess and Carmen Torres all had dinner together to honor Jess, Becca, and Beth, who won the seniors' gold. The party was long enough and loud enough to warrant another five hundred dollar tip, which Sasha was getting used to doling out. It seemed like every time this group went out he ended up trying to make amends for their behavior with large sums of money.

When everybody was back at the hotel and headed for bed, Sasha wrapped his arms around Payson's waist and whispered in her ear, "I know what you want."

She nuzzled her nose against his neck and hummed, "Hmm… You inside of me?"

"Uh, no," he said, as much as he hated to admit it. "You want to go to the gym. You've been wanting to for the past three days."

"Okay, so maybe I want two things. We could do both at once."

He couldn't stop the groan that escaped his lips or the way his hand tightened on her hips. "Don't even joke about that, Payson. It's way too tempting and it would be a disaster if we got caught."

She pouted, which only made him want her more. "Fine, one or the other. Or how about one _then_ the other?"

"That's a plan I like. I pulled a few strings and got the keys to the practice gym. Let's go."

"Aren't you forgetting something?" she asked. "Small guy, poops a lot, requires constant supervision."

"Yeah, and lucky for us there is a great form of supervision staying right across the hall, and he happens to be free tonight. It's almost like I planned this."

There was a smirk on her lips but excitement in her eyes. "Well, if you worked so hard to plan everything we should probably get going. I wouldn't want to miss the fun."

Payson was like a kid on a playground when she was in the gym. It amazed him sometimes; she had been doing gymnastics for fourteen years and the sport had nearly killed her multiple times, but she was still in love with it. No matter how many times she denied it, he wasn't sure that she was done with gymnastics.

She was gaining back a lot of skills on beam and floor, mostly C and D level tumbles and D level dance skills, but bars and vault weren't coming back and wouldn't until she stopped breastfeeding. Her breasts had always been too big for gymnastics, but she was a prodigy and her talent overcame the obstacle… obstacles. She was still overcoming them, but bars and vault were all about precision and balance and that wasn't going to happen yet. She was working a Yurchenko half on vault and A and B skills on bars. Tonight she was practicing giants on the bars and enjoying them just as much as doing a Jaeger. Gymnastics was gymnastics and she loved it no matter how difficult the skills were.

She dismounted with a fly away and landed with a huge smile on her face. Sasha clapped his hands together a few times and said, "That was beautiful, Payson."

She blushed, which told him she knew exactly how serious he was. "It was just giants and hip circles. Nothing special."

"Everything is special when you do it." He always found himself the cheesiest things when he was around her.

She crossed over to him and wrapped her arms around his neck. "Thank you," she said. "You were right, I've wanted this for days, and I love you for making it happen."

"Are you sure you want to retire, Payson?" he asked for the sixth time. He was keeping track, because he promised himself he would not ask more than ten times. If she kept saying no then he would let it go.

"Sasha, why do you keep asking me that? Do you want me to keep competing?"

"No, it's not that," he said. He didn't want her to feel like he was pushing her into it. "I just want you to be happy, and when I watch you in here… I don't want you to give this up because you feel like you're supposed to."

"I didn't retire because I feel like I'm supposed to. I retired because even though I love gymnastics, there are other things that I love more."

He tilted her chin up to meet his lips for a kiss before he said, "I just want you to know that you can have both. You don't have to choose between your life and gymnastics."

"I know, and thank you for pointing it out… often." She drew him into a passionate kiss and he let his hands roam until he was starting to consider her original suggestion of sex in the gym, but then she broke away, grinned up at him, and said, "You know what I feel like doing? Working a double back on floor."

She scampered away and Sasha called after her, "You're evil, love. Evil!"

o-O-o

The best thing about running a gym was that you had it all to yourself outside of training hours. Sometimes Sasha used it to work out, and Payson spent a lot of time on the equipment when the gym was empty. She worked out with Jess during the mornings and for an hour after her short work days, and every once in a while she stayed late into the evening to practice while Austin spent the time with Alex. This was one of those nights.

They were leaving for Nationals in two days and she was nervous, not about how her girls would do, but about how she would react. The last two National Championships had been disastrous for her, and there was no guarantee that the flashbacks and panic attacks wouldn't resurface. She was stressed to the max and needed to do something about it. Playing with her son was her normal form of de-stressing, but gymnastics stress required a gymnastics solution. She was working on the bars again, and he couldn't help but remember the last time she worked on bars, when they were alone in the practice gym in Charlotte. Things had gotten so heated that night that he had seriously considered taking the risk and making love in the gym. It wasn't nearly so much of a risk in their own gym, though. It was locked up for the night and the only other person with a key was Kim, who would definitely not be stopping by.

He knew as soon as she dismounted—with her newly learned and very sloppy Comaneci—that she was feeling it just as much as he was. She was broadcasting it like radio waves; everything about her screamed sex. This could be just as effective at battling her stress as the work out was.

"That Comaneci sucks," he said.

Payson stalked toward him and hooked her fingers in his belt loops and so that she could tug him closer. She whispered, "It's not the only thing that does."

He set her up for the dirty joke, of course, but that never made it any less hot to hear, nor did it in any way lessen his enjoyment when she unbuckled his belt to prove her point. This was what he wanted so badly that night in North Carolina, or at least _part_ of what he wanted, and he only wasted a little bit of time before he took things to the next level.

Payson was caught up in lust, but she did have the presence of mind to point out that they should move to the mats. He should be bothered by the fact that she was thinking about ease of cleaning up before they ever even started, but really it turned him on more. It meant that she had thought about this before, enough to figure out the logistics of having sex in the gym. And it was always better than thinking about cars during sex, which his ego had never fully recovered from.

He could think of more than a few ways to incorporate the bars into sex, but his bad knee killed that fantasy so he contented himself to having sex underneath them. One of the best things about being with Payson outside of their house was that they didn't have to be quiet, so Payson didn't have to force back the screams that she stifled when they were home— but the scream Sasha just heard didn't belong to Payson.

His hips kept moving out of instinct even as he lifted his head to find the source of the scream, but Payson dug her fingers into his hair and forced his eyes to stay on her. "Don't you dare stop. Just a couple—more—"

She broke off with a cry as her orgasm crashed through her, and there was no way to stop himself from following after. Part of him was horrified that they just continued having sex when they knew someone was watching, even if it was a matter of seconds, and then there was a part of him that was turned on as hell that Payson considered finishing more important than getting caught. He knew she could be brazen, but this was taking it to a new level.

He allowed himself to bury his head in the crook of Payson's neck while his breathing and heart rate slowed down, and her hips continued to thrust beneath his. As much as he wanted to believe that it was still her being brazen, he knew the movement was coming from a primal need to draw out her pleasure. If there wasn't a more pressing matter to deal with he would have taken care of that need himself.

He lifted a few inches off of Payson to see who was in their gym, and it was someone he never could have expected. Summer Van Horne was standing in the entrance defying all reason. Why couldn't this woman stay the hell out of their lives?

"Are you some kind of masochist, Summer?" Payson asked, her own head twisted around to look at the door. "You've pissed off every person in this gym to the point that even my _mom_ was a bitch to you, so why do you keep coming around to stick your nose in our lives? Do you get off on being insulted?"

Summer didn't say anything. They might have shocked her to the point that she was brain-dead. Payson pushed Sasha off of her to gather their clothes, which happened to be several feet away, and brought them back. They dressed while Summer continued to stand expressionless in the doorway.

When they were clothed again, Payson walked to the other woman and snapped her fingers in front of her face. "Earth to Summer. You want to tell us what the hell you're doing in our gym?"

Summer jerked back like she'd been slapped, but didn't seem to come out of her daze. "I… I came to see Steve, and he's… he's _living_ with Chloe, and when I drove by here I saw a car and I just…" She turned to look at Sasha. "I just wanted to see you again, to let you explain everything with Payson…"

"_Let_ me explain?" he asked, offended that she seemed to think he was the one who needed to explain his actions and that she got to dictate when that happened. "Well _let_ me explain this to you, Summer. My life is none of your business, and you are trespassing on private property."

He was kicking himself for never realizing that Summer still had a key, and was incredulous that she thought it was appropriate for her to keep it after she was fired. Payson's mind was in a different place.

"What did Steve say to you?" she asked. Now that Payson brought his attention to it, he could see that Summer's eyes were bloodshot from crying. Steve would never say the viscous things that Sasha had sometimes said to her, so he, like Payson, was curious about that confrontation.

Summer was in a drone-like state and answered the question without hesitation or emotion. "He said he was sorry, that he never meant to hurt me and he thought he loved me at the time. He said that it was all his fault because he tried to hold on to something that just wasn't there."

Steve was kinder in his assessment of that situation than Sasha. Sasha thought it was almost completely Summer's fault, because Steve did at least believe that he was in love with Summer, whereas Summer knew she didn't love Steve and stayed with him anyway. She was still that same girl who needed a man's attention to feel good about herself and she chased after whichever one she thought she could get. Whenever one man rejected her she went crawling back to another, which was exactly why she was here tonight. She probably came to see Steve after a break up with another man, and when he was with Chloe she came running back to Sasha.

Payson frowned. "You know, I'm starting to feel sorry for you. What happened to you to cause your self-respect to be so low that you would repeatedly come back to the same men? Is this why you're so judgmental of other people, because you have to do that to make you feel better about yourself?"

"I'm not judgmental," Summer sniffed. "I just try to help people."

"Maybe you should concentrate on helping yourself first," Payson said. Sasha wasn't sure how she ended up trying to help the woman who had been a bane to them, but Payson had a tendency to do that. "Try just being single for a while, figure out what you need."

Tears started falling down Summer's cheeks as she nodded. Somehow both women seemed to have forgotten that Summer wasn't supposed to be there and had just walked in on Sasha and Payson having sex, and now they were having a girl-on-girl counseling session. Summer wiped her cheeks and said, "I should go."

She turned to leave and Sasha reached out to stop her. "Look, I'm sorry to break up this little love fest, but you've got a key to this gym and I'm going to need it back."

She fumbled around for the key and handed it back while Payson shot disapproving looks at him. When Summer was gone Payson shoved his shoulder and said, "You are such a jerk!"

"Seriously?" he cried. "Have you forgotten all the things that woman has said to us in the past? Or the fact that she just broke into the gym?"

"She's crazy, Sasha. Insanity is an acceptable excuse in court." She was fighting to keep her voice serious and a smile off her face, but it wasn't working. They both knew how preposterous the whole situation was.

He stepped closer and slinked his arms around her waist, sliding one hand down to her ass, and said, "If I remember correctly, we were in the middle of something when she interrupted us."

"Give it up, Sasha. The mood is dead."

o-O-o

Hartford was overrun with the best gymnasts in the country, but a lot of them were in the stands this year, and one in particular was coaching. It was a different world for Payson at the 2013 Nationals, but she was busier than ever. Being a coach came with a lot of responsibilities, and she had the additional burden of being highly sought after for interviews. Most of them wanted to talk to her while she was holding Alex because it was a good publicity angle, but she refused nearly every one of those. MJ insisted that she do at least one with the baby and no more than three, so Payson obviously opted for doing one. It was with Nastia and John Roethlisburger for the 'Around the Gym' gimmick, because Nastia was a friend and knew which questions not to ask.

Nastia was holding Alex and he was zonked out on her shoulder. She was wearing an expression common to young women who weren't familiar with babies, equal parts awe and discomfort, but she wasn't letting it interfere with the interview. Payson and John were bantering about diapers, and Nastia brought the interview back to gymnastics with a slightly awkward transition. Sasha guessed it took a lot of years to learn the smooth subject changes that Matt Lauer pulled off in his interview with the girls.

"Is it hard being out on the floor coaching?" she asked. "I know it was hard for me my first year after retirement, and I was on the sidelines. I can't imagine actually being out there and not being a part of the competition."

"Yeah, in some ways it's hard," Payson said. "It's more strange than anything, I think. I competed at the Classic and Nationals for seven years straight, so that was normal to me, but I love being out there with my girls and I'm so proud of what they've done here so far. They had a great first day of competition this morning and they're going to have another great day on Sunday."

"Are you still doing gymnastics? Is that how you lost your baby weight?" John teased. He was always the comic relief of these interviews.

"Oh, geez, don't talk to me about baby weight. It took me months to feel comfortable with my body again, and I'm still not willing to put on a leotard."

The mention of a leo was as close as Payson wanted to come to verifying that she was still doing gymnastics, but it was never that easy. John pushed forward. "So you are doing gymnastics, just not in a leotard?"

Sasha was eavesdropping from his place on the edge of the floor so he couldn't see them, but he could imagine the look on Payson's face. A mixture of guilt and frustration. She wanted to keep Nationals about her girls, not her, but the journalists were interested in Payson first and everybody else second. If she confirmed that she was still doing gymnastics it would be all over the news and the new National Champion, who was likely to be Beth, wouldn't get the attention she deserved. The men's side shouldn't be affected, since they received about a quarter of the attention that the women got anyway.

Payson hedged her answer. "I still work out sometimes. We all do. You can't devote your entire life to something and just quit at the drop of a hat. Just ask Sasha. He retired thirteen years ago but sometimes I have to scream at him to get off the bars and do his paperwork."

"Scream at him?" John asked. "It sounds like motherhood has turned you into a dictator."

"Oh, that has nothing to do with motherhood. I was telling Sasha what to do long before Alex came along." Sasha snorted. It was, sadly, true. She had been bossing him around for years now, ever since she figured out that she could.

The juniors' day one competition finished up a few hours ago, and now they were getting ready for the seniors to start out. In a few minutes Payson would head to the stands to sit with her friends, and a few minutes after that the announcers would start introducing this year's athletes. For the first time in his coaching career, he was coaching a major national competition with no expectation of winning. All of that expectation went to the junior girls, who did fantastic that morning, but they were Payson's gymnasts, not his. He was facing gymnastics mediocrity for the first time in his life. It would change, though. Becca would be a senior next year and they were still looking to fill their other two Olympic hopeful spots, so he would have serious contenders soon. For now he was content to enjoy the break and watch as Payson worked her way up the coaching ladder.

It seemed like the competition flew by, and at the end of the day all of his girls had put in a solid performance and one of the older ones was even speaking with a scout from the University of Florida. It had been a good day, and he couldn't wait to get back to his room to celebrate with Payson.

The men had finals the next day, but the London girls had the free time to spend in Payson and Sasha's room, because, as Sasha had learned, this was what they did in hotels. Apparently it was tradition for them to gather together in one room and talk about nothing in particular. Austin was there too, obviously, but he shooed the others when it was time for Alex to go to bed. A lot of times the three of them would sit around talking after they put Alex down for the night, but tonight Austin left. Payson didn't understand why, but Sasha did. He was trying to give them privacy for what he knew was about to happen.

Sasha pulled Payson to him and they spent a while drowning in each other's lips, enjoying the intimacy without trying to take it to the next level. When he pulled away she chased his lips with her own and kissed him again, and then breathed out, "I love you."

"I love you," he said back. Then he gathered his courage and said the words he'd been trying to say for weeks. "Marry me, Payson."

She drew back in shock. "What?"

He reached up and stroked her face, hoping to make her relax. "Marry me. Lauren always jokes that we act like a married couple, so let's make it real. I want to be your husband, Payson. I want you to be my wife."

She was stunned, and her reaction was less than reassuring, even if it was what Sasha expected. She said, "Sasha, this is insane. We've only been together for seven months. It's crazy to get married that fast."

"Crazy is kind of our thing, love." It was true. It was crazy for them to be together at all, much less get married, but it worked. It didn't matter that he was fourteen years older than her or that she had a baby with another man. It didn't matter that he used to be her coach or that he thought of her closest friends as daughters. It didn't matter that her ex-boyfriend was living with them. What mattered was that they loved each other, and their bizarre life was better than any of the 'normal' lives they were surrounded by.

"Did you ask my dad for permission?" she joked. It was a diversionary tactic to give her time to think, but he didn't mind. He knew he sprung this on her from nowhere.

"No, I asked Austin."

That conversation had been a lot less awkward than he thought. Payson made it clear from the beginning that Austin would be a part of every major decision in her life, so Sasha knew that she would need Austin's approval. When Sasha approached him, Austin said that he came to terms with Sasha and Payson's relationship long ago, and that he knew Sasha would make Payson happy and be a great step-dad to Alex. That was all that was important to him.

If possible, Payson was even more stunned than before. "You asked _Austin_ for permission to marry me?"

"I knew you would need to know he was alright with this," he said.

She lunged to kiss him and cut off anything else he might have said, and when he was so caught up in her that he forgot he even asked the question, Payson gave him an answer. "Yes," she said, her lips mere centimeters from his. "I'll marry you, Sasha. I love you."

It wasn't until their passion was spent that he remembered the ring. He retrieved it from his bag and slipped it on her finger, and to him it looked even more beautiful on Payson's torn and calloused hands than it had on Viola's perfect, graceful hands.

"Sasha, where did you get this?" she asked. "It's beautiful."

He wasn't sure how she knew that he didn't buy it, but he wasn't surprised. She knew him better than he knew himself sometimes, so this was no different. "It was Viola's. She gave it to me the first time she came to our house."

"The first time? Sasha, we'd only been together a couple of weeks then."

He laughed a little, because that was what he said to Viola when she gave him the rings. "I know, love, but she was insistent that she knew what she was doing. Apparently she was right."

"Apparently so," she agreed, staring at the ring in wonder. "Was there _anyone_ who didn't figure out how we felt about each other before we did?"

"Yes, your mum."

This made her giggle, which turned into a full blown laugh that didn't stop until Alex gave a soft cry to remind them that he was trying to sleep. She sighed and leaned into Sasha's chest. "If someone told me when you first came to the Rock that things would turn out this way, I would have said they were insane. Back then I never even though about life after the Olympics, much less imagined that it would be so crazy and wonderful."

"Emphasis on the wonderful," he said. He knew it was cliché, but as they drifted off to sleep together, Sasha thought he must be the happiest man in the world right now.

o-O-o

There was a knock on the door of the men's locker room and Payson's voice floated through. "Is everybody decent in there?"

Austin did a quick check to make sure that everyone was dressed and then called for her to come in. He was glad she was there. In the spirit of typical Nationals chaos, she had been running around all day and he hadn't seen her. She missed breakfast because of a mix up with one of the junior girl's member ID, and after that was fixed she had to be on the floor for the junior men's finals. Nathan Foley, the Rock's newest male junior, was a joint project between Payson and Sasha, so when he competed both coaches were present. That meant that Payson was at the XL Center instead of the practice gym, and Alex was in the stands with Mark. When the junior competition was over the men were thrown head first into preparation for their own final, so this was the first opportunity he had to see Payson.

She came in with Alex in her arms, and Austin laughed when he saw what his son was wearing. Payson had him dressed in a onsie emblazoned with the words "My Daddy Rocks." It was such a Payson thing to do.

"Alex wanted to come wish you luck," she said, crossing the room to give Austin a kiss and hand over Alex.

He looked into the tiny green eyes that were a perfect replica of Payson's and couldn't help but grin. "Well with you as a lucky charm, kid, how could I lose?"

Alex's response was to hit Austin in the face and squeal out "bababa." Austin turned to his friends and said, "In case you didn't catch that, he just said that I'm awesome and I'm going to wipe the floor with you guys."

"He also wanted to tell you something else," Payson said. Her back was to the other gymnasts, so she held her hand up in front of her for him to see the shiny new ring on her finger. Sasha finally had the guts to do it.

"Oh my God, Pay," he exclaimed. "That's so great, congratulations."

"Cut the crap, Austin. He already told me he talked to you about it, so you don't have to act surprised."

"Oh. Well then just regular old congratulations. I'm really happy for you." He stopped for a second to really look at her, and he realized that something was seriously wrong. "But _you_ don't look very happy. What's going on?"

She sighed and reached out to hold Alex's hand, which was her comfort gesture when she was upset, but Austin didn't understand why she would be upset about getting engaged. "I don't know, it's just… this is so crazy, Austin. It's been seven months. _Seven months_. And less than a year ago I was sleeping with you. It's all happening so fast, and it's all so complicated. I have Alex with you, and he's so much older than me, and we're still hiding our relationship for God's sake. Is this how we're going to come clean at the gym, 'Oh, by the way, we're getting married'? It's too much too soon."

He was blown away by her storm of doubts. He didn't understand the female mind, even one he knew as well as Payson. "Okay… if you're feeling all of this then why did you say yes?" He wasn't questioning the decision; he was trying to understand her thought process. If she really didn't think they should get married then she wouldn't have said yes, so he needed to find the side of her that wanted this.

"Because I love him," she said, torn with emotion, "and I want to spend my life with him, and… and because he asked your permission!"

… "You just lost me, Pay. You're going to have to explain that one."

"He knows me well enough to know that I needed him to ask you for permission," she explained. He saw her shoulder's drop as she obviously came to the same conclusion as Austin: that she wanted to marry Sasha and her doubts were just nerves rather than serious concerns.

"Of course he knows that, Pay. He knows you better than anyone does except me. Which is why you want to marry him, despite everything you just said."

She raised an eyebrow at him. "You do realize that it's really weird that you're talking me into marrying Sasha, right?"

"Yeah," he drawled out. "Probably not as weird as when I talked you into being with him in the first place, though. Sometimes even _I_ am disturbed by our relationship."

"Weird but wonderful," she said. She leaned into his chest and looked up at him from where her head was resting on his shoulder. "You know I'll always love you, right? Even though I'm with Sasha, it will always be you first."

"I know. And I'll always love you."

He held her for a couple of minutes until he realized that there were several people staring at them, and he remembered that they were standing in the men's locker room surrounded by his friends. Luckily the only people close enough to hear where the men from London, who knew about the strange dynamic between Austin, Payson, and Sasha. Going through the Olympics together forms a bond, so they naturally congregated together in the locker room while the other male athletes were separate and farther away. To everybody else it would look like an intimate moment between Payson and Austin rather than a discussion about Payson's future with another man.

When Payson became aware of the situation she stepped away from him and said, "Okay, obviously I should go. FYI, guys, we are not talking about this in public yet, so, you know, continue acting the same way you have been for months." Only then did Austin notice that the ring was on her right hand rather than her left. She wouldn't want to steal the attention from the girls competing.

Jake stepped forward to give Payson a hug and whispered, "Congratulations, sis'. I'm really happy for you."

After that Steven hugged her, and then Nicky, and she wished them all luck before she left. It was one of the strangest starts to a competition Austin had ever experienced.

o-O-o

Payson joined Sasha at the edge of competition area as he watched Beth be awarded her gold medal. It had been the same way when she was a junior, that she won her title as soon as she was no longer competing against the other girls who ended up on the Olympic team, but she didn't mind in the least. She was a lot like Becca in that way. She loved gymnastics with her whole heart but didn't feel that driving need to win that the others did. She was grateful to win but not bothered when she didn't.

Payson didn't speak until the national anthem was playing to mask her words. "Looking back at what Nationals was like last year, it's hard to believe how great this week has been."

Sasha smiled thinking about just how great the week was. Jess was the junior silver medalist, she and Becca were both on the Junior National Team, Nathan made the 14-15 Junior National Team by the skin of his teeth, and Austin and Nicky went one-two for the senior men. And not to mention the best part—Payson agreed to marry him.

"So I was thinking about taking a trip," she said.

"Oh yeah? To where?"

"Romania."

He was flummoxed. They had talked about going to Romania together someday, but they never had any definite plans and he didn't know why she wanted to go now. Before the discussion had always been about a romantic getaway, and that wasn't even on the table as young as Alex was. Payson wouldn't leave him for a day, much less a couple of weeks.

"Alright, I'll bite," he said. "Why do you want to go to Romania?"

She glanced at him from beneath her lashes but averted her eyes before anyone could notice. They were still using the ceremony as cover. "Well for starters you dad is there, and then there is all that beautiful country, no paparazzi, and the Belov _conac_ could easily house thirty of forty people…"

He raised an eyebrow that she couldn't see. "So when were you thinking about taking this trip?"

"Well Jess and Becca have to get their fanfare when we get back, but the girls go back to school in just a couple of weeks, so I'd say like… a week from tomorrow?"

"Just to clarify, are we talking about what I think we're talking about?" he asked. He thought they were talking about getting married in Romania a week from now, but he wasn't sure how they got there.

Her only response was, "Yes."

"What changed, love?" Two nights ago she was hesitant to even say yes, and now she wanted to marry in a week. He knew that despite her doubts, she meant it when she said that she wanted to marry him, and he even knew that she wouldn't want a long engagement, but this was skipping over the engagement altogether.

"Dinner with Austin last night," she said. "You know how he is. He gets me better than I get myself sometimes, so we talked through everything. It helped me get a grasp on what I wanted."

Payson and Austin still went on dates occasionally, sometimes with Alex and sometimes without. Last night they ordered room service together in Austin's room while Sasha spent some quality time with the baby. Sasha realized that it was weird for Payson to go on dates with her ex-boyfriend and it was especially weird the night after Sasha proposed, but a lot was changing and they needed to work things out together. It was just part of their strange life, as was the fact that Austin had twice now talked Payson into a major progression in her relationship with Sasha. Austin just wanted her to be happy, which Sasha respected.

"Alright then. A week from tomorrow it is." After more than two years of being in love, a year of living together, and seven and a half months of being together, Payson was _finally_ going to be his wife.

A/N: Pictures on pinterest of Alex's outfit, the Belov conac, and the ring is already up there if you wanted a reminder :)

One more chapter to go! I should probably finish writing it…

So I have a challenge for ya'll. There are an insane number of references to shows, books, songs, and one or two from other fanfics in this story. I don't even know how many, but I know it's a huge number, and some of them are so obscure that I would be flabbergasted if anyone noticed them. So here is the challenge bit: The first person to discover at least thirty of these will get a one shot of their choice from the Amor Fati universe, anytime before, during, or after the story. The next person to get a one shot will have to give me 35, then 40, etc. The only rules are that the direct mention of the name 'Stick It' only counts once (but any other references do count) and that it has to be an intentional reference on my part. If there happens to be something in there that I didn't do on purpose, I won't give you credit for that :) Let the fun begin...


	87. Chapter 87

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI or these characters, and I'm not making any money off of this story.

A/N: Lots of stuff on pinterest for this chapter, which is huge. If I had realized how big this was I would have split into two chapters, but since I already promised you the last chapter, here it is :)

There are two big changes in style at the end of this, but being allowed to do that is one of the great things about writing fanfic :) One of the other great things about writing fanfic is that you're allowed to put in lots of irrelevant details, which I am very fond of doing. Everything is so detailed in my head that I want it to be that way on the paper, too! Sadly I'll have to take those out, but read more about that at the end…

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><p>For some reason Lauren was thinking about the day that Emily first came to the Rock. It was the day that changed everything, and even though a big part of that change involved Lauren being a brat, she didn't regret her actions. She was ashamed of her actions, yes, but she didn't regret them. If Emily hadn't come then Lauren would never have thrown a tantrum and left the gym, her dad would never have sought out Sasha to coach the Rock, they never would have become a family, she wouldn't be an Olympic Champion, and, most importantly, they wouldn't be sitting here on a plane about to fly to Romania. Lauren liked to think that she played some small role in making Payson so happy today, even if it was the role of a villain.<p>

If Lauren remembered correctly, Payson ignored a little kid asking for an autograph the day Emily came. Well, 'ignored' wasn't the right word. It was more 'didn't notice what was in front of her face.' She was so focused on visualizing that she didn't realize the girl was there until they pointed it out to her. Now when she signed autographs she always made time to talk to the little girls and make them feel special.

When they day-dreamed about what they would do after the Olympics, Payson's no-nonsense response was "I'm going to concentrate on winning in Boston." Back then Lauren could never have imagined that the girl who couldn't be bothered to fantasize about a celebrity lifestyle would one day hire a private jet to fly thirty-something people to Romania to elope with her coach.

There was one thing that hadn't changed, though. That day Payson was the first one to talk to Emily and complement her for a well-done tumbling pass, and the first one to cheer for her at the in-house competition for Nationals ranking. Payson never could stand by and watch someone not get the recognition they deserved. It was what made her a good leader, and the reason that there were so many people devoted to her enough to drop everything on a week's notice and fly halfway around the world for her wedding.

Payson's wedding. That still blew her mind. They were the same age, had known each other since they were twelve and gone through hell and back together, but somehow Payson became an adult and left the rest of them stranded in teenage-land. It would be easy to say that being a mom made her grow up early, but she was an adult long before she got pregnant. The turning point, as far as Lauren could tell, had been when Sasha left the Rock. Her heart was broken more than even she knew, but she found her strength to push through and hold the gym together.

Lauren heaved a sigh as she pushed her thoughts out of her head and herself out of her chair. The two Jakes were bonding, so she was temporarily lacking a boyfriend to sit with. She was on a plane full of people that she loved like family, so she had a lot of options for who to hang out with, but she chose to sit down by Becca and Jess, who were huddled together giggling over an issue of Cosmo. There was a three year age gap between the two girls, but they were the only elites at the Rock with international expectations, so they spent a lot of time together.

Lauren spoke to Jess first. "So how weird is it for you, being in the inner circle like this?"

"_Very_," Jess said. "Sometimes I think that I must be locked up in an asylum somewhere and this is all one massive hallucination."

That was stolen and Lauren called her out on it. "You totally got that from Buffy the Vampire Slayer."

"You watch Buffy the Vampire Slayer?" she asked, her voice rising to an incredulous note. "Could you be any cooler?"

Lauren was gloating about the obvious hero-worship when Becca pulled her back down to earth. "Yeah, she could be a lot cooler, actually. Don't buy into the hype. She's a great gymnast, but so are you. The only difference between you is that she's seven years older and bitchier."

"I am not bitchy!" Lauren cried. Then she considered it and amended, "Anymore."

"Okay, I'll give you _less_ bitchy," Becca said. Going elite was turning her into Payson.

Lauren changed tracks. "So how is Payson as a coach, really? Does she torture you with conditioning like Sasha always did with us?"

Becca said "yes" at the same time that Jess said "no," which was easy to interpret. "Oh, you're like her and get off on the pain. Pay always loved conditioning, too. So you're the only person from the Rock that got invited to this shindig. Is it weird for you that she would invite you to her wedding?"

The younger girl wasn't thrown by Lauren's schizophrenic line of questioning. She answered with a question of her own. "Was it weird for you to throw a birthday party for Coach Belov last year?"

"Huh. Good point." Being on the Olympic track did tend to form strong bonds between coaches and athletes, as evidenced by the Rock Rebels' family. It included parents, too, because Kim and Carmen became good friends when Payson started coaching Jess. There were maybe ten girls in the entire country with a prayer of making it to the Olympics each cycle, so parent support was necessary.

Lauren asked Jess if this was her first time out of the country, and then continued to ask bizarre, out of the blue questions for another hour before Payson came over and asked a question of her own. "Lo, why are you badgering my gymnasts with twenty million questions?"

"Boredom," she answered. "Talking to you guys just isn't enough entertainment for an eleven hour flight. I had to find something to do."

"Well leave them and alone and come play with my hair, then. I don't know what I'm going to do with it tomorrow."

Lauren had been appointed stylist for the wedding, a position she was more than happy with. Of course bridesmaid would have been better, but she understood why Payson was only having Becca in the wedding. The entire guest list consisted of fourty people, so having five bridesmaids would look ridiculous. Lauren was content to do hair and make up, especially since it meant that she would be the first person to see Payson in her dress.

Nobody had seen it except her mother, and all the women were trying to catch a peek. So far Payson wasn't biting, but Lauren tried her luck again as they walked to the back of the plane where Sasha, Austin, and Alex were. "You know, I really need to see the dress to know what to do with your hair. The styles for both need to fit together."

"Nice shot, Lauren, but no. You can wait until tomorrow to see it. But until then…" she dug out a small, flat box and handed it over, "you can see this."

It was a headband. A beautiful, delicate headband made with gold and a few tasteful diamonds and pearls. The golden bowtie twisted into the medal was a perfect hint of Payson's personality for those who knew her well. "Pay, this is gorgeous. How did you get this in just one week?"

"The same way I got my wedding dress: lots and lots of money. People are very helpful when you pay them extra. My rep at Tiffany's found this for me, although he doesn't know what it's for."

Lauren was notorious for throwing around money to get her way, but she was nothing compared to Payson. Payson used hundred dollar bills as casually as most people would use singles. Not in a bad way, though. She never used money to manipulate people like Lauren had in the past, but she was willing to pay what was fair (or more) to get things done, like dropping a cool fifty grand to have Monique Lhuillier hand alter a dress from a line that hadn't even been debuted yet. This train of thought led Lauren to realize two more things that were different about Payson since Emily joined the team: one, Payson was willingly wearing a dress _and_ paying out the ass for it, and two, she had the connections to get things like that done. It was a far cry from having to borrow a dress from Kaylie for the Nationals send-off party.

"Okay, _Coach Belov_," Lauren said to Sasha, mocking the name that most of the Rock gymnasts still called him, "You need to go away. This is wedding stuff and you can't see it."

She could tell that he was humoring her, but he picked up Alex and said, "Come on puiule, let's go visit grandpa. You don't want to stick around for all this girly stuff anyway, do you?"

She watched after him as he walked back up the plane to sit with his future father-in-law, a little bit in awe. "Honestly, I never figured Sasha would be good with kids. It's so weird seeing him with Alex like that."

"He is pretty great at it," Payson agreed.

"Which is the only reason I'm letting him marry Payson," Austin said, joining the conversation. "If he wasn't a great stepdad then I wouldn't let him anywhere near Payson or Alex."

"Don't you think it's a bit chauvinistic to say that you're letting her get married, Austin?" Lauren asked. "It's not like you control her decisions."

Payson dropped into the chair beside him and said, "It's not chauvinistic, it's true. Austin has a say in all my big decisions. Sasha even asked him for permission before he proposed to me."

"Seriously, your fiancé asked your ex-boyfriend for permission to marry you? Kelly is right, you life is well and truly fucked up."

Payson had the slightest hint of a raised eyebrow when she said, "Do you want to sit alone in a room in Romania while you watch me get married through a window?"

"Okay, fine, your life is all sunshine and puppies and not remotely weird. Happy?" She ended the discussion by pushing Payson sideways in her chair and saying, "Now shut up and let me work here. We have to figure out what to do with your hair."

o-O-o

Payson greeted Dmitri Belov like a long-missed friend or relative. Sasha greeted him like the awkward re-acquaintance of two people who didn't get along very well in secondary school. Sasha was making an effort to mend his relationship with his father, just as Payson asked, but bitterness had fourteen years to sink its claws into Sasha, and it wasn't letting go easily.

There were a few phone calls now and then, but nothing resembling closeness between the two men. The first time Sasha called, he let his dad know that it wasn't by choice. "I'm calling because Payson asked me to. She wants us to get along."

When Dmitri asked why Payson's opinion was so important, Sasha was frank about their relationship. He didn't sugar coat it or try to explain anything, and Dmitri was smart enough not to comment. Any trip down that avenue would likely have ended with Sasha hanging up and not speaking to him for another fourteen years. They talked about fishing and gymnastics and the renovations taking place in the centuries-old conac that Sasha spent his summers in as a child, but they avoided more personal subjects. Now, months later, they still hadn't breeched those subjects.

Payson talked to the older Belov much more frequently, and much more openly, than Sasha did. Sasha asked her once what she told his dad about him, and she said nothing other than normal anecdotes of their life. It was their job to work through their feelings, she said, and she wasn't going to act as a mediator. She wasn't going to do that here in Romania, either. She spoke with Dmitri for a few minutes and then left with some of the others to explore the house, leaving Sasha and Dmitri alone for the first time since World trials.

"You and I are more alike than I knew," Dmitri said as they watched Payson walk away. "Your mother was a little older than Payson when we married, but people still wondered how such a young, beautiful woman could marry a worn out, beat up old gymnast like me. I never thought that you would follow in those footsteps."

"I'm not following in your footsteps, dad." If his tone wasn't enough to convey his contempt, the word 'dad' certainly was. Sasha stopped calling Dmitri tata the day his mom died, and calling him dad was a slap in the face every time. "I put Payson first, not my job."

The older man sighed as if resigning himself to his fate and then said, "It is different for you, son. You and Payson share the same passion. Katherine and I did not. We tried. I tried to bring her to Romania with me but she was unhappy here, away from her dance and her friends, and we tried living together in London but I was unhappy being away from my home. We lived separate lives, but that did not stop us from loving one another."

"Look," Sasha said, "I know that Payson would tell us to sit down and hash this all out, but I'm getting married tomorrow and I don't really want to start that by fighting with you. So can we not talk about this?"

His dad looked hurt, but Sasha wasn't to the point that he could talk about his mom and not get angry. It was better for them both if they put the subject aside for now. According to Payson, there would be a day when they _could_ have this conversation and not fight about it, but that wasn't going to be today. Instead Sasha gestured to the door that Payson left through and said, "Let's go find the others. You haven't met Alex yet, and Payson gets a kick out of introducing him to people."

They found Payson, Emily, Lauren, and Austin together in the gym, one of the renovations that took place in the sixties and had been kept up to date ever since. Austin was holding the baby while the girls took turns trying to out-do each other with tumbling passes. Lauren was rusty because she mainly trained beam now, but Emily and Payson were keeping pace with each other. Emily's skills were harder, but Payson's specialty now was bizarre combinations. She did a round off, full twist, into another full twist, followed by two more just like it. She called things like that her 'WTF combinations,' because nobody would ever think to do that. It wasn't particularly hard and it wouldn't bring any points at all in competition, but it looked impressive and she had fun doing it.

Dmitri whispered, so as not to interrupt the girls, "She is something, is she not? More personality in one tumbling pass than you see in some girls' entire routines."

This was something that Sasha could have in common with his dad. They could both talk about Payson without any chance of getting angry. "She walks into a room with more personality than some girls ever have. It's different now, too. She's happier."

"That is clear to see. Motherhood has done her good. And so have you."

On the floor, Payson launched into the dance pass she'd been working on for the past couple of weeks—a chaine turn, a split leap with a full turn, a split ring leap with a full turn, and finally a double turning cat leap. It could have been straight off the stage of the Royal Ballet.

"_Doamne_," said Dmitri, "She looks just like Katherine."

She did, and Sasha couldn't figure out how he'd missed that for all this time. There was the obvious similarity in coloring, just as Payson and Sasha had the same blonde hair and green eyes, but otherwise there was no great resemblance. Payson was on a larger scale than his mom was, and she didn't have Katherine's fairy-like features. But when she danced… despite the differences in appearance, Sasha could almost imagine that his mother was alive and dancing again.

Viola always said that there was something special about Katherine that made her a principal dancer while Viola and Charlotte were just soloists, and whatever it was, Payson had it. It was the same unidentifiable quality that captivated audiences whenever Margot Fonteyn danced. Just like Margot, when Payson danced, you couldn't take your eyes off of her.

What Sasha heard in his dad's voice was more than just admiration for Payson, though. It was adoration and longing for Katherine, which was something that Sasha remembered only from his childhood. He lived in England with his mom during the performance season and traveled with her while she was on tour, but whenever they came home to Romania, Dmitri greeted her with that same adoration. For a few weeks his parents would be the perfect couple, but then a gymnastics competition would come up or she would have to go back to England and they would be separated again. As a teenager, Sasha stopped seeing those reunions, but it only now occurred to him that they probably still took place. He was at training camps more often than not during those years, but his mom still came to Romania on her down time.

"She asked me not to come," Dmitri said. For a minute Sasha thought his dad was talking about Payson and the wedding, but he clarified. "Your mother, she asked me not to come. She didn't want me to see her wasted away. My favorite ballet for her to dance was _The Dying Swan_, and she had danced it for me just weeks before we found out. She wanted that to be the death I remembered."

Sasha never knew that, and he wasn't sure he was ready to hear it yet. He swallowed down his emotion and said, "You should have come anyway."

"Would you deny Payson her final wish?"

"You should have come for me." There was so much good to be taken from the admission—that Dmitri had cared, that he had not abandoned his wife at the end of her life, that his parents weren't estranged as Sasha had believed for so long—but Sasha's judgment was clouded by one truth that he couldn't look past. His dad lied to him. His mother was dying and his dad _lied_ about why he wasn't there.

Dmitri didn't make the excuses that Sasha expected. "You are right. I was foolish not to realize that you needed me and selfish not to tell you the truth. I didn't want to face it myself."

Sasha didn't know how to handle this new information, so he cleared his throat, which was feeling suspiciously tight, and moved on like they had never mentioned his mom in the first place. "Come on, you should see Alex. After all, he will be your step-grandson tomorrow.

Payson noticed them as soon as they stepped closer to Austin and Alex. Sasha suspected that she had baby-radar and could tell when someone was near her son even if she wasn't in the same room. Then again, Payson said that she has Sasha-radar and always knew when he was nearby, so it was possible that she was aware they were in the gym and didn't pay them any mind until they moved to Alex.

Payson gave a simple introduction of "This is your bunic, Alex," and then let Dmitri hold the baby while she had a silent conversation with Sasha by which he conveyed the gist of what just happened with his dad. They would actually talk about it later, but for now she slid her arms around his waist and rested her head against his heart, using her body to tell him that everything was okay and her eyes to say how much she loved him.

o-O-o

Mark slipped into the room where Payson was supposed to be getting poked and prodded by Lauren, but he should have known better than to expect Payson to act like a typical bride. While Lauren did Becca's hair, Payson was sitting on the floor trying to coax Alex to crawl. Even as Mark watched, Alex lunged forward for his favorite elephant. He didn't make it, but Payson reacted like he had.

"You know, when you were doing that you looked just like you do when you're about to mount the bars," Mark said. "You were a baby on a mission."

Payson smiled up at him. "Apparently so is he. He's moved nearly a foot since we started this. He's bound and determined to reach Ellie."

"Yeah, and tell him when you started," Becca called over her shoulder.

"Half an hour ago," Payson said. "Becca thinks I've been doing this for way too long, but I think he's done pretty well for not quite six months, don't you?"

"Definitely," he agreed. "He's a prodigy, just like you."

"I wouldn't go quite that far," Payson said. She picked up Alex and the elephant and clambered off the floor. Mark would swear that Alex looked disappointed not to finish the game himself.

There was a photographer taking pictures, someone who owed Sasha a favor or two, and he had probably never seen a bride like Payson. She was barefoot, wearing leggings and a man's button up shirt, and holding a baby. Still, she had the glow of a woman in love. She looked beautiful.

He moved forward to give her a hug while he said, "Just because you don't believe you're a prodigy doesn't mean that you aren't. I knew you were from the first time you did a back handspring when you were three years old. It seems like yesterday, and now you're grown up and getting married."

"I'm still you're little girl, daddy. I know I've grown up, but I'm never going to outgrow you."

"I know sweetie, but I've been thinking really hard about this and… I don't think I should walk you down the aisle today," he said.

"What?" Payson cried.

She looked hurt, and that's not what he wanted to happen. He just didn't know how to say it any better. It took him a few days to become accustomed to the idea that Payson and Sasha were going to get married, much less so soon, but as soon as he got used to the idea something started to weigh on his conscious. He tried to ignore it, but the thought ate at him until he had no choice but to accept it. "Once when you were a little girl you had a pretend wedding with the boy next door, do you remember that? You made me walk you down the aisle and give you away, and I remember thinking how hard it was going to be to do that for real. But Payson—" his voice broke and he swallowed hard "—I don't think you're mine to give away anymore. This is really hard for me, but we both know that I am not the one giving you to Sasha today."

"Austin is," she whispered, finishing his thought. The fact that she understood only reaffirmed what he knew. As much as Mark wanted to walk his daughter down the aisle, it wasn't his job anymore. It was Austin's.

Payson hugged him tight again and said, "I love you daddy." Alex grabbed onto Mark's shirt like he wanted to join the hug, too, and Mark knew that Payson was right—she would always be his little girl, just like Alex would always be her little boy. He would always look at her and see that five year old little girl wearing a white tutu and a big lace doily for a veil.

o-O-o

Lauren knew exactly what she thought Payson's wedding dress would look like: lacy and a little bit slinky. A mixture of old fashioned and sexy. Payson didn't really do frou-frou. She usually went for her own version of subtle sexuality, even when she was pregnant. Big skirts and tulle and satin flowers just weren't her style. Or so Lauren thought.

When they took the dress out of the bag Lauren wondered what the hell they did with her Payson and who the stranger standing next to her was, but once the dress was on, Lauren could see it. It was Payson, as simple as that. Any other dress would have looked ridiculous on her in comparison.

It was hard not to cry when she saw her best friend in her wedding dress for the first time. It was even harder when she watched Kim and Payson have a quiet moment together before they went downstairs. It was impossible when Payson walked down the aisle on Austin's arm. Thankfully she wore waterproof make up.

They stopped in front of the make-shift alter, an elaborate fountain in the Belovs' garden, and had a short whispered conversation before he handed her over to Sasha. Lauren was close enough to hear them say 'I love you' before they kissed and Austin left Payson alone on the alter with her groom. It was so bizarre to see Sasha and Payson standing together in a suit and wedding dress, but it somehow seemed _right_. Not in a 'they're so perfect for each other' kind of way (even though they were) but like this was meant to happen from the beginning. They all thought that everything that happened in the year leading up to London was about their Olympic journey, but maybe they were wrong. Maybe the Olympics were just a step along the way on _this_ journey, leading to this moment.

When the minister started talking Jake leaned over and whispered, "That'll be us one day, Barbie."

She was already crying and that just made her cry harder, so she laid her head on his shoulder and let him hold her. For most of her life Lauren thought of marriage as a trap, and the key was either to avoid it altogether or make sure you were the one doing the trapping. Now the thought of marrying Jake made her feel all tingly and shiny, even if he did call her Barbie and annoy the hell out of her more often than not.

Her dad's voice drifted from behind her in a whisper only loud enough to carry a few feet. He was sitting in the chair behind Lauren, and his words to Chloe were almost identical to the ones Jake just said. "That will be us up there soon."

He proposed the first night they had as a family when Emily and Lauren got home from college. Brian was the only one who knew—he helped Steve pick out the ring—so the girls were just as surprised and excited as Chloe. That had been a night to remember at the Tanner-Kmetko home, and those were the kind of memories that were slowly replacing the ones Lauren wanted to forget, like the way that she tricked them into breaking up when they were first together. She loved Chloe so much for forgiving her for that, like she loved Payson for forgiving her for the kissing picture. She was ashamed of her actions now, and glad to be moving on and growing up.

Payson and Sasha were being cute up on the alter. They weren't acting at all like a bride and groom were supposed to act during a wedding. Instead of solemnly staring at each other over held hands and three feet of empty space, his hands were on her hips and hers were resting on his arms, and they were laughing together with only inches between them. More than once the minister stopped and waited for them to act more appropriate, but they never did. They were too in love to worry about being appropriate.

When they started the vows the laughing stopped, but they didn't move farther apart. Payson cried when Sasha promised to love and cherish her, and both laughed and cried when she vowed to love and cherish him in return. Not a laugh of amusement, but one of complete and utter happiness.

When the minister pronounced them man and wife and said, "Sasha, you may kiss your bride," the two held onto each other for so long that Lauren felt herself blush. She'd seen them kiss before, but this was so much more intimate because it was their first kiss as a married couple.

They didn't break apart until they heard a pointed throat clear from the minister. He indicated for them to turn around and face their family and friends and called out, "Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you for the first time, Sasha and Payson Belov."

o-O-o

Austin stood to the side and waited while the photographer took a picture of Payson, Lauren, Ivanka, and Elisabeta. It matched the ones taken at the Closing Ceremony in London and Payson's Pierre de Coubertine ceremony in Switzerland. They were forming a collection of pictures like that which would eventually chronicle their lives together. He could imagine a picture of them as four old ladies at Payson's seventieth birthday or something.

Once the photographer walked away, Austin interrupted their reunion by asking, "Can I steal the bride for a dance?"

"Of course you can," Payson said, wearing the smile that she only used for him. Marriage wouldn't change a thing. She was still his Payson.

He led her to the dance floor and twirled her into his arms. He dipped her, which made her laugh, and then pulled her back up to say, "Congratulations, Mrs. Belov."

"I like the sound of that," she said, grinning. "Payson Belov. But is it bad that there's still a part of me that wishes it was Payson Tucker?"

"Well that depends. What does Sasha think about it?"

"He says that it's normal and that it's okay to regret what you and I couldn't have." He thought Payson would have told Sasha what she was feeling, but he was glad to know for sure. He didn't want to come between them, and as long as Payson was open with Sasha that would never happen.

"He's a smart man," Austin said. "There's a part of me that wishes it was Payson Tucker, too. A big part of me, but as cheesy as this sounds, we weren't meant to be. I'd rather you be happy with Sasha forever than happy with me for just a little while."

"I'll be happy with you forever, too," she said. She laid her head on his shoulder and looked up at him through her lashes. "In case you haven't figured this out yet, I'm never letting you move out of the house. You're stuck with us forever."

He'd wondered about that. He moved in because of Alex, but it had been six months and they still hadn't discussed how long he might stay there. The longer he was there the more permanent it felt, and he hated the idea of moving away from his son, even if it was only a few miles away. He had definitely considered staying, but he didn't want to force himself into Payson and Sasha's home. If Payson was talking about it now then she had already discussed it with Sasha and they had agreed that they both wanted him there.

"There is nobody in the world I'd rather be stuck with. Besides, Nicky and Ava have taken over my house. I'm not sure if I even have a bedroom anymore. Nicky might have turned it into a weight room."

"More likely Ava has turned it into a closet," Payson teased. "I think she has more jeans than I have shoes."

"We might need to have a shopping intervention with both of you. Especially with A, since she's shopping with my money." Ava was studying geological sciences at CU Boulder, where she put all those jeans to good use by wading into lakes and digging in the mud, but Austin was supporting her financially. He was actually very proud because she found something that she loved, but he almost never let her onto that fact. He'd rather grumble that she was blowing through his money and that she better go to work for an oil company and pay him back for every cent, etc, etc, etc. She didn't take him too seriously, as evidenced by the three thousand dollars she just spent for a new core drill, even though the university loaned out drills to the geology students for free.

Payson ignored his less-than-serious complaint and said, "Our family is pretty fantastic, isn't it? It's weird as all get out, but still fantastic. All that's missing is someone for you."

"I don't need anyone. I have you." He couldn't imagine ever loving anyone other than Payson, and even if he could learn to accept a relationship without love, it wasn't fair to ask that of anyone else. Women deserved to be loved, and he couldn't offer that.

Payson raised a doubtful eyebrow. "So you're going to be celibate for the rest of your life?"

He'd thought about that problem and still didn't have a solution, and there was only one way to get out of the question with dignity. He turned the tables with a subject change radical enough to distract her. "Are you going to do competitive gymnastics again?"

The trick worked. "What, are you conspiring with Sasha now? Why won't anybody believe me when I say I'm retired?"

The 'conspiring with Sasha' part was pretty close to the truth. They'd talked about it several times because they both saw the competitive fire still burning in her eyes. Sasha thought that having Austin's permission, so to say, might go a long way toward breaking through her doubts. "I believe that _you_ believe you're retired. I just worried that you're doing this because you're scared or because you feel like you're supposed to. I see the way you are out on the floor, Pay. You're not training like a girl who's doing gymnastics for fun. You're training like a woman who wants to be the best. Like someone who wants to win Olympic gold."

"Can we please not talk about this anymore?" she begged. He dropped the subject, but he could tell that he planted a seed. For the first time since the Olympics ended, Payson was letting herself think about the possibility of competing again.

o-O-o

_June 19__th__, 2011_

"_A switch ring leap with a half turn would be a D level skill _and_ it would be named after you. You could upgrade it to a full turn in a few months for an even bigger increase in score. There is no downside to this move, Payson."_

"_There's a huge downside to it! My ring position sucks. A well executed acro skill would be better for my score than a poorly executed dance skill. We should upgrade the forward double to a two and a half instead. It would give me the same tenth point increase."_

_This woman—_girl_, he corrected himself—drove him mad. He'd never coached a gymnast who fought him like she did. A lot of them would complain or whine, and Emily still occasionally disagreed with him, but they always obeyed him in the end. Payson, though… god help him if she didn't win most of the time. "I've already said no to the two and a half. I'll consider it _after_ you've increased you dance skills. No matter how hard your tumbles are, it can't make up for having B's and C's for your required dance elements."_

"_If I wanted to dance I would have been a dancer, but I'm not. I'm a gymnast, so I'm not going to prance around the floor like the sugarplum fairy." She stamped her foot as an exclamation point and that broke him. He fought hard not to smile, because if she noticed that he was amused he would have to explain it, and Payson would not take kindly to being laughed at. Also, it would be very bad for his authority as a coach if she were to realize that all she had to do to win a battle was act petulant._

"_Fine," he said, pouring as much displeasure into his voice as he could manage. "We'll nix the ring leap and change it to a full turning switch leap instead, and you're upgrading that Johnson to a three-quarter. Once you've mastered those skills we'll start talking about the forward two and a half, but if I hear one word about it before then, you'll be cleaning every inch of this gym."_

"_Yes, sir," she mumbled, and then she walked to the edge of the mat to work on her new skills. How was it possible for someone to fight tooth and nail like that and then be demure and respectful two seconds later? She had so many layers that he couldn't count them all, and he still found new side of her every day. He'd never been so intrigued by a woman in his life. _

_It wasn't until he turned around that he realized the other gymnasts had been watching them. This wasn't the first time that they'd had an audience while working together and it certainly wouldn't be the last. A gymnast arguing with her coach was unexpected, some might say shocking, and when added to the fact that they were, at times, quite loud, it was natural that they would draw attention. Luckily most of the others in the gym were in such awe of Payson that they didn't attempt to follow her example in arguing with him. _

_He yelled, "Get back to work," and headed to his office where he could smile without damaging his reputation a hard-ass. Kim and Summer were in there discussing wedding details, though, so he reigned in his amusement and pointed to Kim. "If I have an aneurysm before Nationals, it will be your daughter's fault."_

"_Oh? What did she do now?" Kim had the same twinkle in her eye that Payson sometimes had, but the difference was that Kim shared that emotion with everybody, whereas there was a very small pool of people who were privileged to see Payson's mischievous side. As far as he could tell she only shared that look with her family and, very occasionally, Sasha._

"_She staunchly refuses to do the ring leap I tried to put in her floor and is still pushing to add a move that I already shot down. I don't know how Marty managed her for so many years without going mad."_

_Kim frowned as she thought about it. "She didn't really do this with Marty. She always followed his directions to a T."_

"_So you're saying she doesn't respect me as a coach?" he asked. He didn't believe what he was asking or that Kim intended it that way, but it was fun to make her squirm._

_She didn't squirm. She took him exactly as serious as he was—that is to say, not at all. "No, you have just had the misfortune to inherit a more grown up Payson who has opinions of her own. She also doesn't take well to being pushed outside of her comfort zone, which you seem to have made it your goal to do."_

"_I have been trying," he admitted, "but so far it's been a bit of a tug-of-war, except instead of pulling a teenage girl, I'm pulling an elephant."_

"_Don't worry, I'm sure she'll come around," said Summer, which made Kim laugh. _

_Kim explained, "Payson hardly ever 'comes around' to something. There are times that she can be forced into something, but usually she either gets her way or has to be subverted, which Sasha seems to be good at. If she thinks she's won then she'll make small changes; if not, she'll refuse to make any changes at all."_

"_I think you're giving me too much credit," he said. "It's not so much that I let her think she's winning as it is that she's _actually _winning and I'm desperately trying to hold onto any semblance of authority. But speaking of authority… I'm sorry, Summer, but you're not supposed to be up here."_

_Kim sent him a disapproving look so he scrambled to explain. "We have confidential information up here—health records, addresses, credit card numbers. Nobody is supposed to be in the office without a legitimate reason."_

"_Wedding planning is a reason, Sasha, which you would know if you were a woman. You should get used to this now, because whenever you decide to get married you'll have to put up with it for a lot longer than us sitting up here for a few hours."_

_Sasha ignored Kim's teasing and was doubtful of its truth. He rather thought that he would marry someone like Payson, if she were older, and he could not imagine Payson talking about place settings and planning something as cheesy as 'Steve and Summer's Sweetshop.' She'd be more the type to throw a wedding together in a month that was classier and more beautiful than anything she could plan in a year._

_He listened to them prattle for half an hour while he worked, during which time he became absolutely certain that Payson's wedding would be completely different than Summer's, until he finally escaped back to the floor to see Payson's progress on her new leaps._

_She was working on the three-quarter Johnson, and it was not going well. She was too stiff and her legs weren't in the proper position. "You're not turned out enough," he called to her as he neared the floor._

_She glared at him. "Really, more dance? Shawn Johnson was not a dancer."_

"_No, but she borrowed this skill from one. Go to any jazz class of Broadway and they'll be doing this leap. Nearly all of the dance skills in the code of points have been around for decades, sometimes centuries, before they made it onto the gymnastics floor." He circled around behind her and laid his hands on her waist. "Now do a piked straddle jump."_

_His hands moved with her as she bent slightly and then sprang into the air, helping to lift her so that she could do the skill slower and more precisely. When she landed he tapped on her right thigh and said, "Lift your leg."_

_She raised her leg to the side, and her form was horrible. It astounded him that that she could do a perfect backward triple twist, but when she tried to do a straddle her toes weren't pointed, she wasn't turned out, and she could barely lift her leg above horizontal. He held one hand at her waist and moved the other down her leg toward her ankle._

"_Point your toes." He waited until she had done so before he said, "See, it looks better already." He trailed his hand back across her calf and to her knee. "Straight, not bent. You're losing the line here." He slid his hand to the inside of her thigh and applied the slightest amount of torque with his wrist. "Now roll your hip back. Your knee should be facing the top of the wall behind you, but it's not from twisting your leg. It all comes from the hip."_

_He could feel the change in her whole body as she settled into the much more natural turned out position. Her balance settled back to center, her quads relaxed and her hamstring released into a gentler stretch, and there was greater flexibility in her hip. He moved his hand a little lower inside her thigh and lifted up so that her leg rose to a greater angle. Payson gasped. _

"_I didn't hurt you did I?" he asked, concerned that he pushed her too far when he pulled her up at the hip._

_She was biting her lip and had her eyes closed, but she shook her head and said, "No, you didn't hurt me. That was just… surprising."_

"_Sorry. I probably should have warned you that I was going to do that."_

_He slipped his hand back from her thigh to her waist, leaving her to support her own leg, and blushed when he realized where exactly his hands had been. He'd been thinking about form and technique and not realized that he was touching places that probably shouldn't be touched. He briefly wondered if that was the reason for Payson's gasp, but he dismissed the idea quickly. She would have been just as focused on perfecting the skill as he had been. _

_He shook his head and moved away from those thoughts. "Lower your leg now, nice and slow, but don't lose the turn out… Good. Now stand in first position; feet together, shoulders over your hips, turned out, knees pointed the same direction as your toes. You know, there are professional dancers who would kill to have your natural turnout. Now, lift your left leg."_

_She did as he said, and he worked to perfect her form just as he had on her right leg. While he was adjusting her rotation she asked, "So how do you know all this stuff anyway, about turnout and first position and dance studios on Broadway?"_

"_My mum was the principal dancer for the Royal Ballet."_

"_I don't know what that means, Sasha."_

_He chuckled into her ear. "It means that she was the star. I spent half my childhood backstage while she danced, so I learned a thing or two about ballet."_

"_Well, no offense to your mom, but I still have no desire to dance. I'll give you that it's helping with this skill, but I'm never going to be good at this stuff."_

"_You will be when I'm done with you. And I'm not letting you get out of that ring leap. We're working on your ring position later today. Now jump." He lifted her waist again as she did another piked straddle, exponentially better than the first was. "See what a difference that made? Now do the Johnson and remember to keep your turnout."_

_They worked until it was perfect, and then he reluctantly left to work with the other girls. This was a problem, and he would have to be more careful about it. Kaylie and Lauren, and now Emily, were certainly a draw when Steve Tanner begged him to come coach at the Rock, but he didn't tell anyone that Payson was the reason he agreed to come. He'd wanted to work with her for years, and Steve gave him an unexpected opportunity, but it was unfair for him to spend all of his time with her. He would have to limit how much they worked together. Unfortunately it wasn't really appropriate for them to spend time together outside of work. If she were older he would get her outside of the gym and show her how to put _life_ into her gymnastics._

_He didn't let himself work with her directly again that day, but he didn't bother to stop what was quickly becoming a game between them, where he sent disapproving looks at her every time she did something less than graceful and she glared back at him. It was a strange version of a staring contest which, unlike most of their arguments, Sasha was winning. He had a world class poker face, but Payson had already cracked up twice. _

_It wasn't until the end of the day, after everybody else left, that he allowed himself to go back to her. She was working on her Amanar, something that she did with an enormous amount of grace, but she couldn't carry that grace over to her leaps. "I told you we were not done discussing that ring leap, Payson. It's time to face the music."_

"_You're fighting a losing battle here, Sasha. I'm never going to be good at that move."_

"_I told you, you will be when I'm done with you. Now get over here." He got her into a split and then bent her back leg up at the knee. "Payson, I have never seen you do an acrobatic skill without your toes pointed, so why is it that every time you do a dance move your foot is suddenly flexed?"_

_She grinned at him over her shoulder. "Maybe it's a mental block. Maybe I just hate all this dance stuff so much that it makes me suck."_

_No matter how hard he tried, he couldn't stop his smile. "I feel like there's an inappropriate joke to made there."_

_Her mouth dropped and her cheeks turned red, unable to decide between embarrassment and amusement, and it occurred to Sasha that he should not have said that. It was a little too easy to forget the boundaries with Payson._

_She finally decided on amusement and let a small giggle slip out of her mouth. That was new to him. He'd heard her laugh before, but never giggle. "I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to say things like that in front of me."_

"_You're right. I'm sorry. Although technically I'm behind you right now." He should have let it drop rather than making another joke, but the words slipped out. Payson giggled again._

"_You two sound like you're having fun," came Kim's voice from the office. "I almost hate to break it up."_

_Payson ignored the way that Sasha was adjusting every aspect of her leg placement and whined, "Do we have to leave? We just got started."_

_Kim waffled. "I don't want to pull you away when Sasha has finally got you to work on some dance skills, but I have to get home. Becca's already home from school and I don't want to leave her there alone any longer than I have to."_

"_I could give you a ride home, Kim," Summer offered. "I don't mind at all, and Payson could drive your car home when she's done."_

"_Oh, thank you, Summer, that would be so great. Pay, I'll just leave the keys in the office for you."_

_When the women left, Payson and Sasha had moved on to using the wedge mats to work in oversplit, where Payson's form was already improving. If he could ever get her to agree, they could put such an artistic element in her routines._

_Payson followed them with her eyes as they left. "What was Summer doing here anyway? Is she here solely to piss off Lauren?"_

"_In a way, I suppose. Your mum is helping her plan her wedding."_

_Payson made a rather outrageous sound of distaste. "I hope I can get out of going to that wedding; it's going to be horrible. I don't have anything against weddings, but does it really have to be such an _ordeal_?"_

_Sasha was pleased to find that Payson's thoughts on weddings were exactly as he imagined them to be. She was exactly the kind of woman that he wanted to marry, and he hoped that he would be able to find an older version of Payson one day, although he wasn't sure that any woman would ever live up to the one he was working with now._

Sasha drifted awake with the memory still in his mind. If he'd know then how things would turn out… he probably would have ran away terrified. If he'd known then that he was in love with Payson, he never would have allowed himself to stay.

He reached out and pulled her closer to him, and she rolled into her favorite place on top of his chest. Even if he had imagined back then what being with Payson would be like—or any of the times after that when he _did_ imagine—it could never touch the reality. Everything about his life with Payson was better than he expected. Or nearly everything. The wedding was exactly as he thought Payson's wedding would be, except that it took her even less time to plan it than he thought back then. That day in the gym he thought that Payson would throw together a spectacular wedding in the span of a month, but it turned out that she only needed a week. Everything that day had been perfect.

Rather than falling back asleep, he stayed awake to watch Payson. She didn't wake up when she moved closer to him, but he wasn't surprised; he'd exhausted her enough that she wouldn't wake 'til the next day. Sex between them had always been amazing, but the fact that it was their wedding night, that they had just vowed to spend their lives together, intensified everything. It was difficult to imagine that their love making could get any better, but he'd believed that a hundred times before and it always did.

He was happier than he ever thought possible. He was married to the most amazing woman he'd ever met, and he would get to wake up next to her every day for the rest of his life. He could see them now, raising Alex together with Austin, one day having children of their own, coaching Olympic Champions, spending their lives together. For years he looked ahead and saw lonliness and bitterness, but now… when he looked ahead in his life, all he could see was happiness.

o-O-o

Sometimes Payson still couldn't believe how much her life had changed, or how much she loved those changes. When she saw that positive pregnancy test, she thought her life was over. Her shot at the Olympics was gone, her life was no longer hers alone, and she would be forced to spend the rest of her life dealing with the man who got her pregnant, who she couldn't even bear to look at. She blamed Austin for what happened in St. Louis for a long time. She may have started it, but what he did… no woman's first time should ever be like that.

She could almost forget that night now. The memory would never go away completely, but it was like a scar that faded with time. There were so many good memories to replace the bad ones, and she loved Austin so much. Love can cover a multitude of sins, as the phrase went. They both had plenty of sins to cover, but a love strong enough to do it.

Sasha… if there was anything in the world that surprised her as much as getting pregnant did, it was Sasha. She had fantasized about him, but she never thought anything would actually happen. She certainly didn't think she would end up his wife. How long had she loved him? She still wasn't sure, but she remembered hugging him at the Nationals send off party in 2011 and feeling something that she didn't understand. Now she knew it was love, but sixteen was too young to understand that. She wouldn't understand it now, either, if it hadn't been for Austin. Being with him taught her how to love like a woman rather than a girl, and it put Payson and Sasha on the equal footing needed to love each other.

No life was perfect, but Payson thought that hers must be pretty close. She has Sasha, she had Austin, and she had Alex. Alex—her tiny, amazing little angel. Having a baby wasn't part of the plan for years to come, but he barged into her life and took her as a willing captive. He was the reason that she fought so hard when she was sick.

Getting sick, that was another unexpected turn of events. She still couldn't wrap her head around the fact that she had this condition her entire life and never knew about it. They said that the pregnancy didn't necessarily cause the problem to flare up, but she didn't see how it could be otherwise. The timing was too close to be a coincidence. She didn't care, though. She would live through the illness a million times if it meant having Alex, and it sure as hell wasn't going to stop her from having more children. She loved being a mother, and she wanted a chance to experience that with Sasha. She would wait until she was older, of course, but she didn't want to wait too long. Maybe after the 2016 Olympics, when Jess had a gold medal around her neck and life at the Rock settled down for another couple of years.

She knew that Sasha and Austin wanted her to compete at those Olympics, and she would be lying if she said she didn't want it, too. Every time she got on the equipment she fell in love with gymnastics more, and it was a purer love than before because there was no obsession. Now it was a choice; before it had been a need. Choosing to do gymnastics was a lot different than choosing to go to the Olympics, though, and as much as she wanted to make that choice, there were just too many reasons that it wouldn't work. She could enjoy doing gymnastics alone in the gym instead of in front of a crowd, just like she was doing now.

It was ridiculous for her to be in the gym during her honeymoon. It wasn't planned. Alex woke up early because his little body still had no idea what time it was in Romania, and Payson got up to nurse him. When he was through she decided that she didn't want to go back to bed, so she brought Alex and his bouncer seat with her to the in-house gym. Sasha didn't even know she was here, but he would find her soon.

Her movements on the beam were causing loud reverberations, but Alex wasn't bothered by the sound. He seemed to find it comforting, which either meant that he spent way too much time at the Rock or that he took after Payson. Beam reverb was one of her favorite sounds, and it made her feel like she was home.

She was working a front double twist off the beam, and she tried to ignore the reason she chose that skill. A dismount of D-level or above was required for competitive beam routines, and the double twist happened to be the only D-level front skill—but that didn't matter, because she wasn't going to compete again.

Front skills were signature for her. They reinforced the image of a swan because they looked like she was diving forward. She wasn't sure if she would ever be able to do her double front stretched again, but she wondered about a front two and a half twist. Nobody had ever done it before, so it would be named after her if she managed it—but it wouldn't be named after her, because she wasn't going to compete again.

She was landing the skill by the time that Sasha found her. It was very sloppy, mind you, but she was at least standing it up. Sasha picked up Alex as he said, "I'm glad you're keeping a front salto, and that round off, half twisting flic flac prep is very creative. It looks great and gives you a two tenth connection bonus. I never would have come up with that."

She thought about that connection bonus when she put together the combination, but still she insisted, "The points don't matter, Sasha. I'm not competing."

"So you keep telling me. You're not getting enough height on the salto. Go back and do it again." Sasha slipped into coaching mode as easily as he slipped into her… both of which he did frequently.

It was like a step backward in time, with him coaching her through some new move until it was errorless and her following his every command. The only difference was that he was wearing a wedding band and holding a baby while he barked orders at her. Her own rings were tucked safely away in her shoes, where it was virtually impossible to lose them.

The move was solid by the time she landed it for the last time, and she felt the familiar thrill of a task accomplished. Sasha sat Alex back into his bouncer and came to join Payson beside the beam.

"Payson, do you realize you've done in two hours what it would take most gymnasts days to do?" he asked.

"Four hours," she corrected him. "I was working for two hours before you came." She understood his point, though. Jess was one of the best out there, but she would not have been able to learn a new skill that quickly. Even Lauren couldn't have done it, and beam came naturally to her.

"I promised myself that I wouldn't ask you any more than ten times, and this is the ninth—are you sure you don't want to keep competing?"

Eight times he asked her that question and she had a no held ready at her lips. This time she hesitated. "You can't compete after you have a baby, Sasha. My body is completely different now."

He answered so fast that he must have had it prepared. "Larisa Latynina won six Olympic medals after she had a baby."

"That's different, Sasha. _Gymnastics_ is different. Women competed when they were older back then, and the skills weren't as hard. I was pushing it with my age and body type already."

"And you won five gold medals and a silver despite those obstacles," he argued. "You changed the sport to fit your body, and you can do it again. You had a baby six months ago and already you're performing at the level of most of the girls at Nationals, so imagine what you'll be capable of in a year."

He had a point, but there were other things to consider. "I have responsibilities, Sasha. I can't train all day like I used to. I have girls to coach and a baby to raise, and that doesn't leave me time to train competitively."

"You can train with your girls while you continue to coach them. You've already been doing it with Jess, and you can see how much it has helped her to learn from you that way."

He had an answer to everything. Maybe he and Austin really did plot together. "What about Alex? Competitive gymnastics is a rough life. It's not fair to put him through that."

"Payson, loads of professional athletes are mums as well. I travelled all over the world with my mum and most of my early memories are backstage at the Royal Opera House. I loved that life. I loved watching my mum do something that made her so happy, and Alex would love watching you do this."

Finally Payson admitted the doubt that she was ashamed of. "I'll never be as good as I was."

Sasha's reaction was unexpected: he laughed. "You really have no idea how talented you are, do you? You're a prodigy, love. You changed the entire sport to fit your abilities. If you can't do some of your old moves then we'll change it again."

His faith in her gave her confidence, but she still wasn't ready to make the commitment. Sasha could tell, as he always could, what she was thinking and feeling, so he gave her an out. "You don't have to make a decision right now, love. Try getting back on the beam. It will clear your head."

She was more than willing to put competition out of her mind for a little while, so she let herself get sucked back into the coach and athlete dynamic that worked so well for her and Sasha. He wanted to see her mount with a cartwheel through a neckstand down to a v-sit, which was something she had never tried before. They worked on it until she had a good grasp on the move and then started adding to it. A Valdez, which Payson had already; a hop in sur le cou-de-pied with one and a half turns; a jump backward with a full twist to a front walkover, connected to her full twisting flic flac to a handstand and back walkover; a split ring leap into a sissone; a forward walkover; a single turn in arabesque connected with a single turn with her back leg dropped below horizontal; her newly created dismount series. They both kept throwing ideas out until she had a fully formed routine that was more creative than anything she had ever seen. Sasha did a great job choreographing her routines for London, but if this was the kind of material they could come up with together… Sasha might be right. She might be able to recreate herself again.

She landed her dismount after having performed the entire routine for the fifth time, and Sasha walked to her and kissed her soundly. When he let her go he said, "That was brilliant, Payson. _You're_ brilliant, and I never get tired of watching you perform."

She couldn't hold back her smile. "That routine—Sasha, I've never seen anything like it. I can't believe we created that together."

"I can. We're the perfect team, love. I promise this is the last time I'll ask this question, and if you don't have an answer yet then I'll stop asking and let you make a decision in your own time. Do you want to go to Rio?"

She needed that last bit of reassurance. "Do you really think I can do it?"

"You can get there," he promised, "and you can win."

She slid her arms around her husband's shoulders and smiled, finally giving into a desire that took hold of her the first time she stepped back on the floor four months ago. "Then I guess we're going to the Olympics again."

From behind them came a squeal, and Payson turned to see her son waving his arms and smiling. The happy sounds that he was making felt like a sign. Even though he could have no idea what was happening in front of him, Payson was sure of his meaning—Alex was happy that his mommy was going to the Olympics.

* * *

><p>AN: THE END! At least in this story, but the 'verse lives on in my head. I know what happens for years down the line, even in the children's lives, especially Lilah's! So as for a sequel… Will there be one? Probably. Will it be posted? Who knows. Probably not, but we'll see. There will probably be some oneshots from the 'verse, though, like _Those Left Behind_. I've got one for Lilah partially written already.

Before I can even think about a sequel, though, there are two big things to be done. The first is finishing _Mother Knows Best_, and the second is the enormous undertaking of turning this story into an original work. I have to change a million things, cut out all the hugely improbable plot lines (like Payson getting sick), and get rid of all those irrelevant details I love so much. It should be a fun ride!

It's been a blast writing this story, so I hope ya'll enjoyed it!

p.s. If anyone wants a hint about the hidden references in this story, here's a huge one: my favorite TV show is Firefly, which is the best show ever made.


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